Chapter Thirty One:

Kakarot and Chi Chi sped through the air over the green mountain, heading towards Chi Chi's village where even now smoke was rising. Their hair flowed behind them in a brisk wind as they went on. From where she sat at the front of the Nimbus Cloud, the dark haired girl suddenly widened her eyes in horror as a flying fortress rose into view of them, towering above them. It looked quite ominous, veiled as it was in smoke.

'Thats Pilaf's death fortress!' cried Kakarot.

'Its gigantic!' cried Chi Chi.

Then the fortress sped towards them, soaring over their heads and flying into the distance at a colossal speed. The force of its movement sent them tumbling off the Nimbus. Kakarot grasped at the cloud, but he was pulled through, while Chi Chi grabbed at his tail. The pain was terrible, and the two of them tumbled towards the broken and shattered remnants of the village at a breakneck speed.

'Nimbus, catch us!' cried Chi Chi.

The Nimbus cloud obeyed, and snatched them from their fall mere moments before they hit the ground. Overhead a massive green plane shot past them, soaring after the death fortress at a similar speed.

'That was close…' said Chi Chi.

'Please let go of my tail…' whimpered Kakarot.

In the meantime, Pilaf relished his victory as he clutched the ball. 'Yes! There is nothing like the glow from a genuine dragonball, is there? Not that you two would know. But its unmistakable.'

'Unmistakable?' asked Shu 'Then how come you paid all that money for a fake ball?'

Pilaf hit him over the head with his very real dragonball to make sure it was genuine. 'Hey, what did you say?'

'Um… nothing,' said Shu.

Pilaf directed his moving chair to stand between Mai and Shu's own chairs. 'So about those army people, are they still chasing us?'

'Yes, their following.' said Mai, looking at the screens. 'but for the time being their keeping their distance.' She looked up. 'I think we're still safely outside of their attack range.'

'I wonder who they are.' said Pilaf. They could be serious trouble.

Meanwhile Colonel Silver and his subordinate were thinking the same thing as they soared through the air in their plane. 'Who are they Colonel Silver?'

'Probably some reckless millionaires looking for kicks.' muttered Silver. 'They don't know what their getting into. Now less questions and more flying!'

'Yes sir!'

Silver raised his communicator to his lips. 'All soldiers man your fighter jets immediately, stand by for my coordinates.'

Then Colonel Silver pursued the mysterious flying fortress at top speed.

Back at the village, Colonel Silver's men heard the command, and at once halted their tanks. Getting out of them, they got behind the massive vehicles and pressed buttons on the back of them which reduced them to capsule form. As they stooped to grasp them, however, a blade lashed out of nowhere and dug itself into the ground where the soldiers hand had been.

'What was that for?!' he cried.

'You are literally standing in the ruins of her Kingdom.' said Kakarot ruefully. 'You know, the ones you made.'

'I'll ask the questions!' snapped Chi Chi. 'This is my village! Who are you people?!'

The soldiers lowered their guns in ranks. 'I don't like her tone of voice!' said one, cocking his gun.

Then Kakarot was upon him. He knocked the gun from his hand, then leaped up and snapped his neck. The others went at him, but he plunged his hand through one mans chest, before drawing it out and roundhouse kicking another in the neck with such force that there was a snap.

At that moment a series of energy blasts were unleashed, and Kakarot turned to see Chi Chi beating down quite a few red ribbon forces. 'Your not supposed to hit girls!' she cried, as she ducked and weaved throughout them. 'Shame on you!'

Then she was standing atop a mountain of defeated opponents, crying. Kakarot walked up to one of them and gripped him by the throat with one bloodied hands. 'Where is the Ox King? Tell me, or I'll crush your throat, and ask someone else.'

The man looked terrified, and pointed away. 'That… way…' Then he fainted.

Kakarot looked up and saw a massive figure bound in many nets. A great hand forced its way through, and Chi Chi stopped crying as the Ox King arose once more, unharmed.

'Oh good you're alive.' said Kakarot.

'Daddy!' cried Chi Chi as she approached and hugged him by the hand.

'Lets get out of here!' cried a soldier, tossing a capsule out. The others followed suit, and there were many poofs of smoke, before a series of planes appeared. The soldiers rushed for them, and Kakarot turned round in full. 'Oh no, you don't get to trash my friends villages and live to tell about it. Kaaameeehaaameee-'

Chi Chi set a hand to his shoulder and shook her head. 'Don't kill them Kakarot, it won't fix the houses or bring anyone back.'

As the planes flew away, Ox King groaned, and Chi Chi rushed up to him. 'Daddy are you alright? We need you!'

Kakarot kneeled down by the corpses of his defeated enemies and fished around in their pockets. After a moment of searching he found two capsules and put them into his pockets for later.

Meanwhile Silver's plane had been led into some cloud cover, so that nothing could be seen in front of their faces save the clouds themselves. 'Its getting foggy,' said the pilot 'visibility is poor!'

Silver marveled at his ability to state the obvious and looked out the window, bored.

'Its impossible!' cried the pilot. 'They've vanished into thin air!'

'What!' said Silver, turning his attention to the front, and seeing that, sure enough. the fortress had simply disappeared before them. However lights could be seen shooting down through the higher clouds. 'Up! Go above the clouds!'

The pilot obeyed and soared upwards until they righted themselves and shot over the clouds far above the world. Yet still no sign of their quarry could be seen. 'Hmm,' said Silver 'not here. Well I guess the hunt is on…'

At that moment a shadow blocked out the sun, and Silver looked up to see the fortress not before them, but behind them! Machinegun turrets came out of the walls and opened fire. The pilot screamed in fear and tried to avoid, but after only a few moments they were caught on the wing and sent spiralling downwards towards the ground.

There was a terrible sudden impact.

Pilaf's laughter resounded throughout the death fortress as the plane careened down to earth to crash as a flaming wreck. 'Serves them right!' he proclaimed. 'Oh yeah, whose got the dragonball now?! Ahahahaha!'

As Chi Chi bandaged her fathers wounds, Kakarot waited for his friends to arrive. Finally his curiosity outweighed his desire to seem in control. 'Who were those soldiers? Did you know them?'

'Uh… well… no.' said Ox King 'But given my past, I must have some enemies out there. You see I used to be a very bad man to those who were not my subjects.' Chi Chi looked up in shock, with wordless exclamation. 'But thats besides the point, they crashed your party.'

'Crashed my what now?' asked Kakarot.

'You're terrible,' said Chi Chi 'how can you even pretend you don't know?'

'Didn't know what?' asked Kakarot.

'Thats weird,' said Ox King 'you sure did seem to enjoy that feast we set out in your honor.'

'Feast?' asked Kakarot 'You mean those apples I ate?'

'No,' said Ox King 'well… you were…'

Why did Kakarot get the feeling this was going to be one hell of an awkward conversation? 'Can we eat?'

Meanwhile the remaining members of Silver's forces flew through the air, seeking their superior. They scanned the surrounding landscapes in vain. Finally someone caught site of Silver, standing unharmed by the wreck of the planet, stoic faced. The body of his pilot lay on the ground, gruesomely deformed by the crash, and covered in blood.

They landed and gave Silver his radio, before assembling before him. Silver kneeled down by the radio, and opened a channel. 'Headquarters this is Silver, we have come under fire and lost our fix on the target. Can you pinpoint their location with the dragon radar.'

Back at the Ox King's village, explanations were being made. while Kakarot eat a meal.

'So if that wasn't Kakarot at dinner, where was he?' asked Ox King.

'Oh he was with me,' said Chi Chi, blushing. 'he came right out of an apple tree when I was at the pond. We were talking about how wonderful it would be to get married and have a family!'

Kakarot marveled at her ability to misinterpret his words to fit her own personal delusions. He considered making some snarky commentary, and then decided the food he was eating was of a higher priority than trying to explain thing to her. He'd probably just get slapped again.

'Then who fooled me at the table tonight?' asked Ox King, thinking about it.

'There is only one man with the audacity and cunning to successfully impersonate me, and steal a dragonball from the grasp of heavily armed troops.' said Kakarot 'This was the work of Emperor Pilaf! No doubt he seeks to rule the world once again!'

'Emperor Pilaf?' said Ox King. 'You mean he was after the dragonballs? Like the one you took from my castle.'

'Yes,' said Kakarot 'and I fear it falls to me once again to stop him. Even so, this is a master stroke even for him. To have convincingly impersonated me tail and all…' Kakarot shuddered at the thought. 'he is truly my greatest enemy. Either that or everyone in this village is a complete and total moron.'

'Kakarot!' came a call from out the door. 'Kakarot are you here?!'

He looked up. 'And here are my friends. One moment please.'

They moved to the doors and found a car blazing down the road downwards the house. It pulled to a halt, and Bulma got out, looking around in shock. 'What happened here? Kakarot, did you do this?'

'Kakarot I thought we'd talked about you destroying villages and how it was wrong.' said Blue Launch, before sniffing at the air. 'Ah, ah, achoo! Alright so… wow I someone really messed this place up.'

'It wasn't me,' said Kakarot 'those guys did.' He pointed to the mangled corpses of his enemies. 'Them and ten others who got away.'

'Ah,' said Bulma, averting her eyes. 'well I'm glad you're alright, kid.'

'Did you get the dragonball?' asked Puar.

'No,' said Kakarot 'once again Pilaf has outwitted us.' He drew out the dragon radar and read it. 'Even now he is fleeing away from here in his death fortress. We must stop him.'

'Kakarot,' cried Chi Chi from behind. 'what about the party?'

'…I'd say the party has been more or less crashed.' reflected Yamcha, looking at the ruins.

'Meh, as far as mass destruction goes I give this a six out of ten.' said Launch, loading her gun. 'Needs work. Lets waste em.'

'Bye Chi Chi,' said Kakarot as he leaped into the chair. 'I look forward to putting a collar around your neck!'

'What kind of goodbye is that?' asked Yamcha as he gunned the engine.

'I've got plans.' was all Kakarot would say as they drove off.

'Kakarot!' cried Chi Chi angrily. 'Harems are not romantic!'

Ox King came forward and set his hand on Chi Chi's shoulder. 'Chi Chi, are there some details about your relationship with Kakarot that you haven't told me?'

'No,' said Chi Chi with a sigh. 'he's just a barbarian.'

'Be patient, that boy is on a quest.' said Ox King 'But he'll settle down. One day.'

'Oh,' said Chi Chi, feeling disappointed in how things had turned out. 'I guess.'

For a bit she had been in the adventure, but now it seemed she had fallen out of it.

Black, an imposing dark skinned man in a fine suit, looked at the dragon radar with impatience as the ball came to a halt. He looked to General Red, where he was sitting. 'The radar says the ball is now stationary.' he stated quickly.

'Sir, we've just received the coordinates.' said Silver over the com. 'We need to verify the position. I have… PX303 Southwest. Correct?'

'Roger,' said Black 'its within a one mile radius of your current location.'

'There is nothing here but a barren desert!' snapped Silver. 'They wouldn't have ditched the ball here after such a hard time getting it. It doesn't make any sense!'

'The radar is highly accurate.' snapped Black, irritated by his tone. 'Your current position is correct. Now you are wasting your time! You can mull over how much sense this all makes while you're conducting your search. You'd better get started. It'll be dark soon.'

Kakarot drew out his dragon radar. 'Now lets see what the radar says.' To no ones great surprise they were still a ways off. The days of travel had goten boring.

It took a number of days to come anywhere near the balls location, and as they rushed through the desert they would stop every so often for Yamcha to teach Bulma and Launch more martial arts. They were, in truth, in less of a hurry then perhaps they ought to have been. Bulma and Launch were learning the tricks little by little, and becoming more proficient. Launch in the mean time was teaching Yamcha to use the kamehameha wave, with occasional advice from Kakarot.

However much Kakarot enjoyed looking at Bulma and Launch working up a sweat, and the clothes they wore clinging to her nubile form, he was not at ease. Something kept bothering him. He kept looking at the capsules in his hand, reading their label. Finally he looked up. 'Bulma, can I ask you something…'

'Yeah Kakarot, what is it?' asked Bulma.

'What is capsule corp?' asked Kakarot finally.

'Uh…' Yamcha opened his mouth then closed it.

'Its only the worlds biggest company!' said Bulma proudly. 'My dad invented capsules, and everyone wants to buy them.'

'Why don't others sell them?' he asked.

'Well we've got copyright of course,' said Bulma 'my dad patented the invention. It won't wear off for years and years.'

'Okay,' said Kakarot 'may I ask why you are supplying our enemies?'

'Er… what?' said Bulma.

'The soldiers who ransacked Ox King's village used capsule tanks and capsule planes.' said Kakarot simply. 'I want to know why you've been selling to these goons?'

Bulma's face turned white for a moment, and she seemed to remember something else that made her troubled. 'Well I… you don't understand, people just buy these things. We're not really responsible for what they do with them.'

'…You are.' said Kakarot in deadpan.

'Now hold on a second Kakarot, thats not fair.' said Yamcha.

'I think the Ox King's subjects might have a different opinion, Yamcha.' noted Puar.

'Yeah,' laughed Launch 'those red ribbon goons did sort of mess the place up a lot.'

'We aren't very big on weapons tech.' said Bulma weakly.

'Bulma,' said Kakarot 'this capsule corporation sells everything. Literally everything. Houses, means of transportation, tanks and aircraft. Are you seriously telling me that you don't ask what people are going to do with the heavy weaponry they purchase?'

'I…' Bulma stammered.

Yamcha seemed at a loss for words on how to defend her. Puar and Launch were looking at her matter of factly, and sweat dripped down Bulma's brow. 'I don't know, okay! Just because I'm the daughter of the CEO of Capsule Corp doesn't mean that I understand how it works! I don't know what kind of questions my dad asks before a sale, because I'm not involved in the running of the company! Now can we please keep moving?'

'Fine,' said Kakarot 'but you really should learn a bit more about this at some point.'

They rushed onwards through the sands in silence. No one knew quite what to talk about now that they were on the road again. The earlier confrontation had spoiled the mood. In boredom Kakarot looked at his dragon radar.

'Hmm, we're getting very near,' he said, scanning the area. 'but I'm not seeing anything. Bulma could this thing be broken?'

'Its not broken.' snapped Bulma.

'Could you look at it before you make a judgement.' said Kakarot in irritation. 'This thing has seen a lot of action!'

'I know my own inventions Kakarot!' she snapped.

'Then why don't you know who buys them?!' shot back Kakarot.

'I don't need to justify myself to you!' shouted Bulma back.

'Quiet.' said Yamcha in a cold tone of the sort no one wants to disobey. 'We're approaching soldiers. See.' He pulled his car to a halt, and they saw many soldiers walking too and fro with metal detectors. They sifted through the sands with their hands, and dragged the butts of their rifles through them in the beating sun.

A series of planes flew over their heads.

The plane soared over his soldiers hard at work seeking the dragonball. From where he sat in the co pilots seat, Silver contemplated the matter. 'If that huge fortress landed or crashed I would have surely seen it out here.' He thought to himself.

Then he looked back down to his soldiers and continued to wait.

The group crept up behind a grouo of soldiers, hiding on the dune beyond as the two men sifted through the sands. They were hunched over, and looked very bored. 'You know, I don't think the dragon radar's working.'

'You know, I agree.' said the other 'I think they spend too much on that kind of junk.'

'Well, we now know for certain they have a dragon radar.' mused Kakarot. 'Care to comment, Bulma?'

Bulma shook her head.

'Oh yeah,' said a soldier 'big money.' Then he exclaimed in surprise! They looked up and saw that one of the soldiers had vanished. He looked up to his friends. 'Hey come here!'

'You find it?' asked a soldier.

'No, no…' said the man, before suddenly his legs were submerged in what appeared to be quick sand. In moments he had disappeared from sight. Before the others could react, they too were dragged down by some unknown force.

'What is happening here?' wondered Kakarot.

Suddenly Bulma stood up, as she saw a communicator lying in the sand. Without warning she burst forward towards it.

'This is Silver, come in search party.' No answer. 'Hello, is there anyone there?! This is Colonel Silver, do you read?! Search party come in!'

At that moment Bulma picked up the communicator. 'Hi there, how are you today?' she asked in a false cheerful tone.

'What the… who is this?! What is your unit?'

'Oh I'm not part of your little club of scoundrels.' said Bulma 'I'd just like to thank you for taking part in this successful capsule corporation test.'

'Capsule Corporation… what is the meaning of this?!'

'Well I mean I did invent the dragon radar,' boasted Bulma 'so I've been experimenting with creating emitters specifically designed to project the same energy as the dragon radar.'

'Don't try to fool me, you brat!' snapped Silver 'I know that there was a dragonball in that store! Our scanners detected-'

'The scanners I invented.' said Bulma 'Quick question, hot shot? Did you ever actually see a dragonball in the store?'

There was silence on the other end.

'Didn't think so,' said Bulma smugly 'see I figured I'd test out the emitter by setting up a shop which sold fake dragonballs. I was going to give everyone who purchased one a free refund, but you didn't actually pay for the product did you?'

'…You've been deliberately wasting our time, you little bitch!' snarled Silver.

'Hey no need to get hostile,' said Bulma 'oh wait you already did get hostile! You walked into town and started murdering people in lieu of asking politely. I had to get your little cadre of psychos as far away from civilization as possible.'

'This is the last mistake you'll ever make.' said Silver. Then the channel cut out.

There was absolute silence within the HQ. The conversation had been an open broadcast, and had reached all channels on the Red Ribbon Army. Black looked to where General Red was stroking his pet with a shudder of rage. 'Kill her.'

'Colonel Silver,' said Black 'your orders are to abandon the search and kill the girl.'

'Understood sir.' said Silver.

There was a pregnant silence as they waited around, without any clear idea on how to move next. After a moment Kakarot came up behind her. 'So, may I ask what the point of all that was?'

'I don't know!' cried Bulma 'I'm making this up as I go!'

At that moment there was a terrible sound of droning and they looked up to see a vast host of aircraft approaching them. 'Whats going on?' asked Puar.

'Run,' said Launch, cocking two machine pistols. 'thats whats going on!'

They fled to the vehicle, as the sound of machinegun fire came from behind them. Bullets tore through the sands around them as they leaped into the car and drove off. Bulma swerved this way and that to avoid the shots that tore around them. Launch pulled herself up out of the sun roof and opened fire with her guns, trading fire with the planes. At the same time Kakarot looked out the window. 'You know you could just use a kamehameha wave don't you?!' he called up.

'Are you kidding?!' cried Launch as her guns downed a plane which exploded. 'Killing these punks with guns is the sort of thing I live for! Ahahahaha!'

Kakarot reflected to himself that Launch looked truly appealing holding machine guns. He'd love to see what she looked like clad in chains. He could picture her defiant expression as he forced her down onto a bed…

'Ah, ah, achoo! Ah! What am I doing standing here, its not safe! Eeek!' Blue Launch tumbled down as machinegun fire raced past where she had been moments before. 'Why does this keep happening to me?'

'Puar,' said Yamcha 'get me my RPG.'

'Right,' said Puar, before using a capsule that revealed an anti tank weapon.

'…Why were you keeping that?' asked Kakarot, morbidly curious.

'I'm a former bandit,' said Yamcha as he shouldered it. 'I come prepared.' Peering out the sunroof, he launched a shot which soared towards a plane that was hit, and exploded into flame, its wreckage crashing to the ground. The others, however, intensified their shooting.

Suddenly their tires were shot out, and the ride became far rougher. Out the window, Kakarot could see a vast swath of foes heading towards them at high speed. 'Bulma, I hope you have an escape plan.'

'I'm doing the best I can!' snapped Bulma 'Why don't you fire a kamehameha wave or something?!'

'Even I can't shoot down that many planes!' snapped Kakarot before he remembered Chi Chi's fight with Master Roshi. 'Wait a minute! We don't have to! KaaameeehaaameeeHAAA!'

He launched the wave straight out the back window. In an instant the beam shot out like a rocket, and all the windows shattered. The force sent the car speeding across the desert at a speed that sent the whole landscape out as a blur. Launch fell out to land in the front seat with a crash. Bulma was slammed against the back of her seat. Puar cowered, as the wheels caught fire and the car was sent hurtling through the air, propelled by the kamehameha wave.

Then, in entirely different surroundings, they crashed.

The group limped out of the car wreck, clutching their heads and feeling terrible.

'Well that… certainly happened…' said Yamcha.

'Why won't the world stop spinning?' asked Puar, eyes swirling.

Bulma fell to the ground with a crash. 'Why did I decide to provoke the red ribbon army again?'

'I don't know!' snapped Kakarot 'The only thing you've done is get them off Pilaf's back! That… may or may not be a good thing.' He raised the dragon radar. 'Alright, alright, so lets just pretend as though Bulma's plan made sense, and start looking for another dragonball. With any luck we'll be able to get it before Pilaf and his cronies do.'

Meanwhile the five soldiers who had been dragged down awoke within a cell. A video camera sprang to life before them, showing a blue imp like creature. 'Welcome to my humble abode!' he said 'I presume you belong to some army, what with those snappy uniforms of yours. Why don't you come work for me?'

'Never!' snapped the leader 'Just let us go!'

'Well you may change your mind soon enough…' said Pilaf.

'Sire,' said a woman's voice. 'the enemy army has moved on. Their chasing the kids who stole your wish last time.'

'Excellent,' said Pilaf 'now we need only gather the other dragonballs and we'll be home free!' Things were looking up for Pilaf and his henchmen.

Authors Note:

Okay, just a quick note, I have no plans to make this a harem. I am merely writing Kakarot in character at this stage. The whole harem sub plot is almost certain to crash and burn, and the sooner Kakarot develops past this phase the better. Even so, for now he wants a harem. I didn't plan this, but I'm running with it.

Now you may be wondering why I choose to keep Pilaf in the game. After all, he's just a joke character. He isn't very menacing in his first arc, and he only gets less so afterwards. So why keep him?

Because, and you aren't going to believe this, I consider Pilaf to be a far more competent main villain than General Red. Seriously, just look at their resources, their plans and their results. Pilaf has no strong fighters, only having gadgets and his death traps. When he mistreats his subordinates, its mostly to speed up their results. He has to rely on out smarting Goku and the Red Ribbon army, and given limited resourced and manpower he does a pretty good job. He also has a very strong evil plan, he desires to rule the world. And he comes pretty close to doing it.

In sharp contrast, General Red has many strong fighters at his disposal. He has a massive army, and yet he wastes it. He singlehanded kills off his best and brightest soldiers not just for one failure, but for partial success. As for his evil plan, he wants to make himself taller, its pathetic, really.

So yeah, General Red might look more menacing, and kill more people, but Pilaf is overall the more competent and resourceful adversary. Primarily because he has a plan worth a damn, and doesn't waste his resources.

The reason that this chapter was so delayed, aside from the reasons stated in the previous chapter is because I'm binge watching Dragonball season 2, to figure out how to fit everything together. Updates for this season will likely be a bit slower, because I plan to deviate more from the source material.