I won't tell you it's a secret you need to keep at all times. You can let others know if you think they are close enough to either of you. The knowledge about who we are changes relationships, oftentimes making humans go out of their way to accomodate us because they feel like they have to. That's why we keep our civilian forms a secret.
-White Heart
"Now that I think about it, how did your birthday go?"
Gabriel's question was directed at IF, who wondered what kind of thought brought him to this subject more than a month after the day. Not that they did not have time to talk, the plains south of Nicos were near-deserted save for a few Dogoos. December did that to flora and fauna alike, with only Monsters remaining.
After a moment of recollection, the brunette shrugged slightly. "Nothing much, I don't celebrate it most of the time and the girls can only force me to a certain point." Alexis quietly chortled in the background while Gabriel rolled his eyes, the redhead used to her behaviour by now. Nepgear wore a lenient smile as she joined the conversation: "It was a little weird... but just watching a movie with another friend was nice, too."
Thankfully, the purplette did not call her out on the half-truth. Nepgear and Compa could only do so much, but the younger children had been much more enthusiastic and much less willing to cooperate. Mari encouraging them did not help the matter, either.
"But seriously," Alexis chimed in from her other side, eyes still focussed on their surroundings, "most kids wouldn't miss out on a chance to party. Don't give me that look, teens are still kids to me, too."
"A perk of being old?" IF immediately regretted having said that, even though the dumbfounded look Alexis threw her way was hilarious. André and Gabriel laughed at the expression.
After a moment of quiet and fake seething, the brunette shrugged. "Perhaps? You've gotten more snarky the last few months." IF quietly agreed, knowing the one responsible without even having to think.
"Let's just say Nepgear's sister is a handful and I'm not nice enough to let her get away with everything she does." She did not apologise, even though it might have been a little much. Everyone here took as many jabs as they gave.
"Anyway, I was never one for that kind of excitement. I can understand people celebrating Lady Purple Sister because she is a CPU-Candidate... but I rather spend my time exercising." Her late response to the implied question made Gabriel chuckle and André nod at her; for some reason however, Nepgear became uncomfortable. The other girl displayed her usual tell, averting her gaze from IF just a bit and fiddling with her skirt's hem.
She did not comment, even though she took note of it. Her friend had been doing this noticeably more often over the last month. Whatever it was likely was not her business, though; if it were, Nepgear would have said something by now.
With silence descending on them again, the group of five continued on their way; at one point they exchanged greetings with another patrol passing by, but that was all they said. Gabriel occasionally tried to tempt her into a match of Dogoo-sniping, but the purplette did not take him up on the unspoken offers.
At some point, Alexis fell back from the men and walked alongside the girls, throwing a concerned look in Nepgear's direction. "What's with that cloudy expression? Is everything alright?" IF remained to the side and waited for what the response might be, though she hoped it was nothing serious. Another part of her doubted that it was as trivial as Nepgear having trouble to keep up with her curriculum.
The girl herself sighed after another moment of silence, turning a helpless gaze toward the brunettes. "I... I am thinking about something. It's very personal and sis always says to think about it a lot... but I just don't know anymore. I'm running in circles in my head." Both of them nodded understandingly; personal problems were well known to everyone, especially the difficult kind. Had her friend not emphasized on the fact it was private, IF would have asked to hear it and tried to provide her own opinion. Seeing that Alexis did not ask either, she thought similarly.
Nonetheless, IF took a step closer and gave her friend a light slap on the shoulder. "If you feel like talking about it at some point, I don't mind listening." She mainly wanted Nepgear to know that the offer was there.
The purplette nodded slowly, her brow scrunched as she considered. "Thank you... I... I have to think about that, too."
When Alexis returned to the other adults and the day went on, Nepgear's expression already brightened quite a bit. She was not back to her usual gentle air, but no longer giving off a feeling that worried her friends.
. .
. .
IF had already forgotten about the matter when her and Compa's winter break started. The last one before their graduation.
Much in difference to her usual behaviour however, IF found herself reading a book lent from her friend; it was neither a textbook nor an actual novel, or at least it did not deserve the latter as a descriptor.
Indeed, IF, current gem of the Guild and agent to be, was busy going through a second-rate romance 'novel'; the girl lay sprawled on her bed, naked feet poking over the edge without a care. Her room was warm and she had a cup of juice on her desk, completely shut off from the cold outside. The girl turned another page and frowned down at the numbers, having finished about three fourths of it in the previous hours.
It was not her normal reading material, but she could at least admit that it was nice to just turn her head off for a while. Furthermore, reading one of these before deciding the genre had little of interest for her felt better than just dismissing it outright; now IF knew she really was not missing anything.
However, she did take note of one fact. A character introduced early on was constantly running around with a bothered expression, which she knew applied to Nepgear as well. Much later, it turned out that person had a crush on the protagonist but was too reluctant to admit it.
Deep down, IF knew this was unlikely to be the case with her friend. Yet she could not help but wonder if, perhaps, Nepgear did have a crush on someone. That kind of secret would fit her previous explanations on the matter as well.
She also wondered how to react if that crush was directed at her, as unlikely as it was. What could, or should she say in such a situation? Nepgear was both gorgeous and a great person, but IF remained secure in knowing that she did not feel that way for her. Even if she did, she had no time for a relationship in the first place. Exercises, practice, studies, all of that ate most of her days without much trouble. That was one of the reasons she looked forward to her graduation; with school no longer taking large chunks out of her day, she could focus more on what really counted.
A few minutes after IF finished the book and put it aside, someone knocked at her door. The brunette slid on her coat out of habit, taking but a moment before answering: "Yes?"
With a slow movement of the handle, a most familiar face came into view once the door was opened; slightly sharp features framed by dark pink hair and softened by a gentle smile. Mari gave her a lookover as she opened the door fully. "It's unusual to see you lazing around, Isa."
IF snorted in response, though she had to agree with the statement. "You're not wrong. I just got done reading something that Compa recommended... and now I was trying to figure out if there is anything in it I should actually remember." Mari's smile warped into a smirk. When her charge pointed at the book in question, she began to laugh outright. "Pfff, sure. Nothing useful in there, trust me. Pfehehe, I read that one before."
The brunette offered a smirk of her own and bit back the comment she immediately thought of. Then she realised Mari was an adult just like the others she got along with, so she would probably not mind. "So you're saying your taste in books is terrible? Good thing you didn't imprint those on me while I was in my formative years."
The laughter drained quickly, being replaced by a sly smirk and a flick to her forehead. "Feisty, aren't we? Be glad I'm not the kind of woman that regales your friends with what you did when you were younger."
She quietly agreed, though the subject was changed rather abruptly in her opinion. "I guess? What would you even tell them?"
Only after saying it did IF realise that she ran right into a trap. Mari grinned and sat down with her, tapping the girl's toned stomach. "Oh, I don't know? Maybe like the time you got your first period and thought it was a training accident. Or-" "I get it, please stop."
She held up her hands in surrender and Mari was kind enough not to push further. She just chuckled over IF's luminescent blush. "Don't be too embarassed about it; you were eleven."
She was right about that, but the brunette still felt the way she did. Sex Ed was taught in the third year of Middle School in Planeptune, meaning that she did not 'officially' learn about these things until a year after it already happened to her. It would have been even longer, had she not entered Elementary School at five years old due to her studious behaviour; most students that turned six amidst the school year had to wait until the next one started.
Mari finally reigned in her mirth and pointed at the door with her thumb. "Care to take a walk with me? I don't have time and we need to talk." IF smiled in understanding; they were understaffed lately, with quite a few of the older people retiring or switching elsewhere. Mari remained as one of the most senior members of the staff despite only approaching forty. Now she had to run herself ragged keeping an eye on everything until they were done hiring and integrating new people. She did not show any signs of exhaustion, though.
To IF, it was a sign of trust that Mari even told her this much.
She quickly pushed back her chair to get up and downed the remaining juice, motioning for Mari to go ahead as she did. IF took her glass along to drop it off in the kitchen. "So everyone's mom has to go check that the kids are behaving?"
They looked at each other for a moment, then Mari smirked. "Naturally. And I'm bringing everyone's big sister because they actually listen to you." Both of them chuckled now.
"But seriously," the older woman noted after catching herself, "You're a great help when you have the time. I'm still sad you won't work with children yourself, you would be good at it." IF just hummed in response. She liked working with the younger children as well, but long since decided this was not for her.
Mari kept quiet for a while, following a train of thought IF could hardly guess. She absent-mindedly blew away a stray strand of her pink locks, taking in the girl walking by her side with a fond smile as she did. "You've grown up. I still remember the time you used to hug my leg and now you're taller than I am. You will turn eighteen next year."
She almost sighed the last part, which was enough to tip IF off. Now she knew what this conversation was supposed to be about.
The afternoon sun cast its warm gleams through windows they passed, ignored by both of them. If Mari expected her charge to speak up, she was waiting in vain; IF had no idea how to respond and thus stayed silent. They had stopped at some point, looking out and toward the leviathan that was Planeptower. Mari gently leaned on the windowsill. "It feels weird to know you are leaving soon. How do you feel? Excited to start your own life in earnest?"
Her first reaction was a shrug, though IF took note of Mari's saddened look. "I haven't thought about it all that much yet. It might be a bit lonely to be by myself all of a sudden." The pinkette moved to say something, but reconsidered and closed her mouth again; her lips curled into a weak smile over the words spoken, though neither of them missed the fact something else stood in the room as well.
Once she was of age, IF would officially inherit her parents' possessions as per their wills.
"It has been a long time," the brunette noted with a wistful glance outside, tracking a handful of snowflakes; they were but the vanguard of a heavy snowfall that would soon begin, with the sky already clouding over. "But it doesn't feel like that."
"Heh, I know that feeling. You will probably do better than me when I moved out; you already have a job waiting for you, and a clear goal in life." She chuckled drily.
"You never stopped, did you? You still want to become a Maker."
It was a statement, seeing that they both knew the answer. IF shrugged again and turned her head to the older woman. "That's the plan. MAGES. and CC2 made it at twenty-two, so maybe I can make it in another seven years."
The pinkette chuckled again before squeezing IF's shoulder. "If this came from any other person, I would not believe they could actually do it. With you however, Isabelle... I think you can." With her words, she pulled her charge into a gentle embrace.
IF let it happen, enjoying the warmth and wrapping her arms around the smaller woman's back. "Heh, thanks. I'm glad you always believed in me. I might not be the way I am if you hadn't."
Mari remained silent for a few moments, both of them unwilling to break apart just yet. "You know," she finally whispered to the girl in her arms, "at first I thought you would give up two weeks in. Then you didn't. Your self-discipline is awe-inspiring, to all of us. I'm glad I got to watch you grow up like you have."
She said nothing more and Isabelle did not ask. She simply stayed where she was, content with how things were going. She had no parents of her own, yet being like this with Mari made her happy in a way nothing else could.
This, she reasoned, was what a mother's embrace had to feel like.
. .
. .
Some weeks went by in peace and soon the year would come to an end.
Running in the cold was a weird sensation; IF had to wear a tracksuit to keep her body warm, and felt warm for as long as she moved. Once she stopped however, it started to get cold rather soon. Sweating like she did was not nice in winter.
In this case, she was out early to get her exercises done before she had to meet up with Compa; they decided to celebrate the new year together, which meant that her evening and night were unavailable.
As she followed one of the main roads however, a horn sounded nearby and made her slow down to look. Then she came to stand at the sight of Neptune; the purplette was clad in a heavy coat and wore a helmet, stopping close to the sidewalk on a motorcycle of all things.
The amused smirk she threw at IF once she took off the helmet conveyed everything about this matter, though she did not comment on her surprise. "Fancy seeing you here, Iffy. Training?" The brunette nodded a confirmation, then looked over the sleek form under her lilac-haired friend. It was a dark blue with silvery parts, not really the kind of colours she would have expected from Neptune. "I'm more surprised you have one of those."
She was given a shrug and the small woman slapped her machine. "It's getting a little old and I don't drive it all that often. But I got some free time with Nepgear in Lastation, so I thought 'why not'." It was a good point to IF; her colleague spent the whole break with Uni after noting she had little chance to visit her otherwise. The brunette had considered tagging along, but ultimately decided against it for this time. There was no real reason, she just did not feel like it.
After a momentary pause, Neptune's grin grew a little wider and she leaned forward. "I'm sure you would look cool on one of those bikes, too."
IF just raised an eyebrow at the purplette, suppressing a shiver when a cold breeze blew past them. She considered it, taking classes once she finished her education. With her income from the Guild, something like that was... not cheap, but affordable. There would also be time left for driving lessons after her graduation.
"Aha, you're thinking about it!" Neptune giggled over the unamused expression thrown at her, then patted IF's shoulder. "If you go for it, just let me know and I'll sell you mine for a discount. It's old but reliable, and Nepgear improved both the capacitors and the engine a bit."
IF snorted at the impromptu sales pitch, then shook her head. "Whatever you say, Nep. I might take you up on that next year."
They both exchanged brief smiles, then Neptune pointed at her clothes. "Anyway, how is training going? You're rocking that track suit, by the way."
IF looked down at herself over that, seeing nothing out of the ordinary and sighing at the comment. "I'm doing fine, almost done with my daily run." She decided to ignore the rest entirely.
After a moment of introspection however, another thought made it back to the forefront of her mind and she cast a more serious gaze in Neptune's direction. "Actually, is everything alright with Nepgear?" Neptune immediately snapped to attention and IF quickly added an explanation: "She has been acting weird for a while and said it was something personal. I won't ask you what it is, but... is she okay?"
The purplette relaxed as fast as she had tensed up, her lips curling into a much more faint smile this time. "Yeah, she's okay. Or she will be, I guess. Just give her time to sort this out; it's something she got to do by herself and I can't help her, even though I wanna."
IF accepted that reasoning and would have fallen into her usual habit of awkwardly standing around for a moment, but this was Neptune she conversed with. The older woman gave her no chance to drag her feet like that. "Hey, do you wanna have lunch? Eating together is much more fun than eating alone."
She considered the question for a moment and was in the process of shaking her head; there were still other exercises waiting. Then however, the brunette realised she rarely spent much time with Neptune before. They got along well enough, but there was just never the time; this was an opportunity.
Instead of turning her down, IF nodded slowly. "Sure-" "Great! Hop on!"
Neptune patted the remaining seat behind herself, grinning up at the surprised teen in front of her. When IF began to move, she quickly produced a second helmet for her to put on. "How lucky I have two helmets with me today~"
The brunette took a deep breath to shake off the snark that bubbled up, putting on the helmet with unused fingers. Once it was on, she got onto the machine behind Neptune and tightly wrapped her arms around the smaller woman's midsection. Said woman just nodded back at her. "Good to know you know how it works. Off we go!" With that, she started the engine and reinserted herself into traffic.
. .
. .
Far to the east, two girls were hard at work. Around them stood workbenches, containers with all kinds of mechanical parts and tools, and many more.
Nepgear, clad in her comfortable non-school uniform, was seated at a table to the center; before her lay a mass of metal parts and loose screws, which she carefully placed one by one after taking them out of the arm-sized contraption in front of her. She slowly worked through each and every part, examining them with critical eyes before making small alterations or putting them back where they belonged.
Next to her, in casual black as usual, Uni was busy filling cartrigdes with gunpowder; one by one, she added the mixture with practiced motions. At times she unconciously licked a flake off her fingers, though those missteps remained rare. While she could use a machine for that, doing this by hand like her sister felt much more satisfying.
After some more rooting around, Nepgear carefully put the last pieces of the rifle back together and set it down. "I'm done. The safety was blocked after all." Her hands wandered over the metal while she spoke. "Though there are a few weird edges around the handle. Can you smoothe those out?"
Both of them were relaxed during their work, though Uni's eyes narrowed at the criticism. The Lastationite cast a withering glance at her latest creation, reminding herself that being angry at her friend for telling the truth was wrong. She made a mistake, so she had to fix it. Her sister certainly would have managed it flawlessly.
Nepgear only had a weak smile for the younger girl's sigh. She knew very well that her friend wanted to reach perfection.
Then however, Uni surprisingly changed the subject. "Anyway, how is IF doing?" Her expression gave nothing away and thus gave everything away; Nepgear knew well how this kind of face always hid an emotion her childhood friend did not want to display. Curiousity was the most likely contender in this case, though concern might also be present.
After a moment of thought, the purplette shrugged. "She is doing as fine as always; her dedication to the job is inspiring." She did not need to elaborate on that, having described her friend's regular routine's before. She also knew that Uni approved of such strict self-discipline, even if it was much more common here in Lastation. Not to mention that her older sister Noire set an even more inspiring baseline.
Then again, nobody could take it up with Noire in terms of work ethics.
"There is more to it." Uni did not seem to have shared Nepgear's tangent, having kept an eye on how the purplette's expression clouded over. "Did she hurt herself, or... did you have a fight?"
She weakly shook her head in response, slumping onto the table. "Nooo, none of that! I want to tell her and I'm not sure if I should." She sounded miserable in a way that confused Uni for a moment.
"Tell her... what? Oh." Then realisation hit and the Lastationite paused.
Nepgear used the silence to add to her words: "And sis won't tell me if it's okay!"
Now the black-haired girl pushed her cartridges away, some of them rolling off the table and pinging off the ground. She slowly layed her head onto the table so the two girls could see in each other's eyes again, still alienated but more worried about her friend. "I do think she is a nice enough person, but I didn't expect you to think that much of her. There is no one like her in my squad, either. And... I haven't really had a reason to talk to sis about this myself."
Nepgear appeared generally unhappy, rubbing her cheek on the rifle she worked on earlier without a care. Before either of them could do or say anything else however, another voice had them snap up and sitting straight: "You wouldn't know what to do even if we talked about it."
Their heads turned in sync, surprised gazes focussing on the third woman that somehow managed to sneak into the room without either of them noticing. While taller and generally more mature than Uni, Noire was rather obviously her sister as they featured the same pale skin, black hair, and red eyes. Where Uni's face was more round and a little bit softer, Noire's appeared sharper.
The adult nonchalantly strode through the room in measured steps, sitting down opposite to them with a casual grace neither girl could match. Her eyes took in both Uni and Nepgear, though her lips were tugged into the beginning of a lenient smile. "This is a decision each of us needs to make for themselves. It is also left to each of us how to approach the matter. We can... and should not help you sort out your own feelings. If you not think but feel the time is right, and that your friend earned it, you should tell them. Not a moment sooner and not a moment later."
Her tone was a note more gentle than most times they met, but Nepgear knew it still left no room to argue. Uni had immediately clamped up and tried her best to sit straight, a futile attempt to imitate her sister's posture. The purplette sighed and slumped again, not bothering to keep up appearances around friends. "I know. It's just, I would have liked a second opinion at least."
Noire casually flicked one of her twintails back behind herself, offering another weak smile to Nepgear. "I know Neptune would love to help you, but she wants you to be independent one day. You need to base some decisions on your own judgement."
The purplette just groaned in response; she understood, but she did not have to like it.
. .
. .
It was a weird atmosphere IF found herself in, having tea with Neptune while looking out at the setting sun. What little of the sky one could see beyond Nicos' imposing skyline was painted orange, the shine even further covered by errant clouds.
Neptune did not talk for once, busying herself with some kind of paperwork; she took sips from her drink in-between, going through the sheets at a rapid pace. IF could guess that those were related to her work, but decided against asking. She still remembered that the woman in front of her was with the Inquisition.
The time they spent together flew by like nothing; dinner had been simple but nice, with the two of them talking about recent events. Among others, they discussed the fact that while two new Makers had been appointed earlier in the year, another had retired without a replacement. With Rosso gone, Planeptune now had only two active Makers.
This was highly unusual, for a nation to go without their third Maker for more than a month, let alone three. Neptune had no idea why Purple Heart was taking her time with Rosso's replacement, either. The remaining two, Tokai and Steamax, kept a strict silence over the matter, even when asked directly.
With no answer forthcoming, the subject had ultimately changed and the two of them exchanged their Chirper-nicknames. IF did not really chirp a lot, so her account was not that well known; Neptune greeted her as "a fellow lurker" in response. That, on the other hand, was weird; the bubbly purplette appeared like the kind of person who could chirp away all day.
Then again, appearances could be deceiving. IF already knew that her older friend had much more depth to her than she usually revealed. Now that they were done eating and Neptune got to working, this insight once again affirmed itself. The brunette did not try to pry, but she had to admit to herself that she was curious. "Aren't you off-work right now? Why do you have to go through those?"
For some reason, the purplette snickered in response and shook her head. "Silly Iffy, I'm never really off-work. And I've got lots and lots to do, I'm a busy Nep. I just sneak in some work when I feel like it, that's all."
IF nodded throughout the explanation, having to suppress a lenient smile. Despite how carefree she usually appeared, there was a diligent side to this woman as well; it was as unusual as Neptune herself, but it was there.
Soon after that exchange, they finished up and saw each other off. As night descended on them, Neptune rode into the dark with her usual cheer and a loud honk. IF could not help but let out an amused huff as she realised she got tricked out of three hours of her workout routine; it was almost time to meet up with Compa, so all she could still do was getting changed for that.
She knew she should be exasperated, but it was clear that Neptune had no ill will toward her. IF made a few stretches and jogged off, wanting to make up for at least a bit of the exercises on the way home. She just had to be careful not to slip and fall.
In a way, even though Neptune and her rarely got to spend time together, they seemed to have become good friends already.