Chapter 7: Coming to Terms
Sunlight streaked through the room, hitting the young woman as she tried to snuggle farther into the warmth of the comforter to escape the invasive beams. Giggling broke through the fog as she realized that she'd never get back to sleep if her children were up and ready to explore the new day.
The laughter grew closer to her closed door, a smile gracing her lips as she stretched languidly beneath the covers, intent to stay in the soft bed as long as possible, though a rumble in her stomach and a brief burst of queasiness made her grumble.
The doorknob rattled, little hands unable to open it all the way as she sat up and stretched once more, her back popping slightly. Noah creaked the door open, his little nose poking into the room first. When he saw her sitting with her focus on the slowly opening door, he giggled and pushed it wide, a loud "sup'ize!" filling the once quiet room.
Jake wasn't too far behind and Sydney could hear her mother's encouraging voice urging him. Stepping into the room with a tray containing buttered toast and a large bowl of oatmeal, he flashed his own dimples before making his way to her bedside.
"Well, look at this!" Noah climbed up onto the bed and went straight into her arms, a wet kiss squishing against her cheek before he stuck his thumb between his lips and snuggled into her side. "What's the occasion?" Pushing away her upset stomach she cuddled her littlest boy.
"Mommy…it's your birfday. Did'ja forget?" Jake's eyes never left the tray, his tiny steps making the trek across the room much longer than usual.
Realization swept across her features as her mother laughed from the doorway, a glass of orange juice in her possession as she didn't entirely trust the five year old to carry it without staining the carpets and hardwood floors. "You know what…I did forget. Thank you for reminding me, my boys, this is the best birthday present ever."
Taking the food from her eldest, letting him climb up to side on her other side like his brother, she munched on the toast before casting it back to the tray.
"What do you want to do today, momma?"
"You know…I think we should go into town and play on the new playground grandma was telling us about. What do you think?" Noah 'hoorayed' from his spot before standing and beginning to jump on the comforter.
Laura swept him up with tickles to his sides as she rebuked him for jumping on the bed in a way only a grandmother could, as Sydney set the tray aside, the sight of the food making her stomach feel a bit uneasy.
"But that's what you would do on my birfday. What do you want to do?" Jake looked up at her with piercing blue eyes, intent on doing whatever his mother wanted to do – even if it was wasn't as much fun as a playground.
Sydney smiled sweetly, cupping his chin and setting a kiss to his forehead. "I want to spend the day with my two favorite boys having fun. So, you should go get dressed and I'll get up out of this bed."
Before her sentence was even complete the boys were off, their footy pajamas scuffing across the carpet as Sydney stood, stretching for the last time as she straightened her crooked camisole and made her way over to the bureau to grab clothes.
"I don't want you going into town alone, honey." Busying herself with making her daughters bed, she felt more than saw Sydney's eyes boring into her back.
"Mom, it's been two and a half weeks. If Rick was going to show up, he would have done it already."
"You don't know that."
Heaving a sigh she made her way into the adjoining bathroom. "Mom…I - I don't want to be afraid to go outside with my kids. Why do we have to suffer and be stagnant because he decided to get a little punch happy?"
"Because he almost killed you Sydney. You don't think that learning it was Rick instead of the car accident was easy on us, do you?"
Sounds from the bathroom stopped as she poked her head out and saw the tears on her mother's cheeks. "You weren't supposed to know that," she grumbled, splashing cold water onto her face in an attempt to try and cool herself off a bit, willing her stomach to settle so she could start her day.
"Well, now we do."
Laura flopped down on the bed with one leg folded under her lithe body as she stared at the partly closed door of the bedroom.
"Mom, if you're so worried why don't you come? Rick would have to be out of his mind to try anything with you around." Her chuckles from the bathroom made her mother laugh, knowing that her daughter was likely right.
"I'll leave a note for your father."
The new park wasn't crowded and the boys instantly wanted to play and touch everything. Noah journeyed into the sandbox with his big-wheeled truck and a bucket while Jake sprang into action and climbed to the top of the jungle gym and slid down the long, yellow curled slide.
"I'm proud of you, you know." Sydney turned to face her mother, the women seated on the bench overlooking the playground.
"Thanks mom. You were right you know." Seeing the confusion in Laura's eyes she continued, "about me needing to leave sooner."
"Honey, I also know that it was easy for me to say while it was almost impossible for you to do."
A comfortable silence filled the moment as she squeals of her boys wafted over.
"Sometimes I wish I was as strong as you; maybe I would have left earlier."
Grabbing her child's hand Laura squeezed it hard. "You're my daughter and I love you, but you never give yourself enough credit."
"It's been a problem since I was a kid," Sydney laughed, shaking her head. Noah called out for her as he stood in front of the swings, so she set their light jackets on the bench and walked across to him.
"Sing!" His little smile lit up even the outdoors as she set him in the toddler seat, poking his legs through and making sure he was comfortable before giving it a gentle push.
"Ooh…me too momma!" Jake scampered off the slide and over to his family before jumping up onto the seat.
"Let's practice pumping on your own." Helping him start she reminded him to tuck his legs under and to lean forward when going backwards and the opposite when going forwards.
Jake started to get the hang of it, though his little body got tired quickly, and Laura watched from the bench as the now single mother pushed both of her boys, three different laughs filling her heart with warmth.
She couldn't keep her thoughts from wandering as she quietly folded her hands over her crossed legs, her memories floating to the previous year.
Pulling up and parking in front of the small townhouse, Laura and Jack exited the car with excitement bubbling in their stomachs. Each carrying several wrapped bundles they made their way up to the front door, knocking three times.
Their breathless daughter answered with her one-year old son on her hip and a purpling bruise on her right cheekbone.
"Mom…dad…what - hi!"
"Sydney, goodness!" Dropping the gifts in the entryway Laura cupped her cheeks and examined her face. "What happened?"
"Oh, don't…nothing – it was an accident. A…the students were playing baseball a couple days ago and I had recess duty and got nailed. What are you two doing here you said you couldn't make it in for Noah's birthday!" Deftly changing the subject she passed the excited toddler over to her mother and accepting a large hug from her father.
"Gammy! Papa!" Jake thundered down the steps and threw himself at his grandfather.
"Where's Rick?"
"He said he won't be home until late because he and his friends have their game night. Which is basically watching football at a bar rather than in the living room."
They chatted into the evening as the boys played with the new toys the grandparents had given them, Sydney staring at the stack of children's clothes that now littered the table.
"Papa do story-time?" Jack couldn't refuse his grandson and carried him upstairs, the three-year old leaning in to give his mother and grandmother hugs and kisses before being hefted over a shoulder and bounced up the stairs.
Laura turned serious hazel eyes on her daughter, Sydney flinching and turning away from the intensity in her mother's gaze. "Tell me how you got that bruise."
"Mom…I told you."
"I've always been able to tell when you're lying, Sydney Anne, don't think that since you're not fifteen-years old that you can get away with it."
Unable to take the severity of the conversation the flustered daughter rose and began cleaning the dishes in the sink from the cake and ice cream. "Please don't mom…just accept that it was an accident and leave it, alright? Please?"
"Sydney you are smarter than this!" The slump of her daughters shoulders made her soften her voice to a near whisper, "if he's beating you…you have to leave."
"He's not beating me! Can't you just drop it?"
"You are my daughter and I will not just sit by while you let this man ruin your life!"
"I'm not kid anymore; you can't just walk in here and assume that my life is terrible!"
"I'm not assuming anything with that giant bruise on your face!"
Sydney stopped pretending to wash the dishes as her eyes filled and spilled over, tears plopping into the water before she turned hurt and sad eyes on her mother, "I just…I don't want to leave him mom; it…it was a stupid mistake."
Laura desperately wanted to pull her daughter into her arms like when she was a child, but needed to accept that Sydney would live her life how she wanted, regardless of her advice. Calming down a bit she rose slowly, making her way into the kitchen where here sniffling daughter stood.
"Honey, I…I'll trust your judgment on this one, alright? You know him better than I do. But know that I'm worried and I don't want to see you or the boys hurt in all of this. Promise me that if it happens again…you'll leave."
Pulling away and wiping her nose on a napkin she flashed her megawatt smile, dimples caving her cheeks in as Laura reached up and wiped her tears away with the pads of her thumbs.
"I love you, mom."
"Love you too, sweetheart. If…if you need to leave you are always welcome at the house – you know that."
Nodding as her father walked into the room, "Jake's asleep honey, out like a light." He stopped seeing his two girls crying in the kitchen, both sets of chocolate eyes pleading with him not to say anything.
Laura remembered how Jack had nearly given them both whiplash after slamming on the breaks with his desire to turn back and throw the lot of them into the vehicle – and she now regretted that she convinced him not to.
"Mom? Hellooo?"
The subject of her thoughts waving hand in front of her face brought her back from the past, the two smiles of her grandsons and the curious face of her daughter made her chuckle and wipe at the tears on her cheeks.
"Sorry, I drifted off there."
"Can we get happy meals grammy? Wiff chickie nuggs?" Laura agreed quickly, hefting Jake on her hip as the group made their way back to the car.
The two women walked into the house each carrying a sleeping child. Things were quiet and they shed their shoes before carrying the boys up to their bedroom and getting them tucked in. Ten minutes later they were laughing at the kitchen table when a knock on the door pulled Sydney away, the young woman forcing her mother to sit and relax.
Tossing it open the smiling green eyes of Michael Vaughn greeted her. "Hey,"
"Hey. Can Jack come out to play?"
She giggled and moved aside letting him in. "I don't even know if he's here. Why don't you get something to drink in the kitchen and I'll check his office."
They went their separate ways, Sydney jogging up the steps and making her way into the large den. Her father sat at the large desk poring over papers, his glasses sitting low on his nose. She knocked gently when he didn't hear the door open and his focus shifted, Sydney smiling a greeting.
"Morning, sweetheart."
"It's afternoon, dad. What have you been up to all day?"
"You know…things."
"Michael's here."
"Oh good! Can you let him up?"
Sydney grinned as he went back to his paperwork. "Am I going to get a paycheck for being your assistant?"
His chuckle followed her as she retreated, skipping down the steps and reentering the kitchen. "He's in the den, you can go on up."
Snagging a muffin from the pile sitting on the table he said his farewells and left the ladies to their chatting.
"How are you feeling?" Laura asked with concerned brown eyes on her daughter. "Your spirits seem lifted this last week."
"Emotionally? I feel better. I mean I'm pretty sure I'm still a wreck which – I hope is normal," she smiled, twisting her fingers together.
"It's normal, honey. I'm just glad that you're feeling something other than fear and sadness. You never deserved any of that, Sydney."
Nodding her agreement tears pooled in her eyes as she looked back up at the strongest woman she knew. "I'm glad I have your help to get over this…over him. I'd probably still be there if I didn't have you and dad – thank you for being my friends as well as my parents."
Laura's eyes spilled over as she pulled her little girl into her arms, the two crying into each other's hair. "Look at us – speaking of emotional wrecks,"
"I'm sorry, mom."
"For what sweetheart?"
"I didn't really realize that staying with him for so long would hurt the people around me. I…I just assumed that if I kept it secret and didn't let it leave the house that – that no one would know and you'd all be safer for it." Sydney wiped at her cheeks, guilt coursing through and settling in her stomach.
"Sydney…you can never know how you're going to react when things go wrong. Your father and I don't blame you for wanting to try and stay in your marriage or for thinking that the man you gave your heart to was deserving of a second chance."
"And a third…and a fourth…and a fifth," releasing a pained laugh at her morbid joke she propped her head up in her upturned hands, the counter cool on her arms. "I just…I'm sorry."
"Apology accepted, though not necessary."
Sitting in silence yet again, this situation beginning to be a habit between the two of them, her mother noticed the paleness of her daughter's cheeks. "Are you feeling okay? You look pale," she slipped into parent mode and placed the back of her hand to Sydney's forehead.
"I actually haven't felt that great for the last couple days – maybe it's a bug, maybe it's stress, I dunno. All I know is that food is really unappealing lately."
"I'll make you something for your stomach."
Standing and preparing a cup of peppermint tea, Sydney couldn't help but smile as her mother doted on her. She also wouldn't admit that she loved it, despite the fact that she'd always hated being coddled. Truth was, her stomach had been doing all sorts of things over the last few days and Sydney couldn't quite figure it out. The sight of food made her queasy and mid morning to early afternoon seemed to be the worst – which was always when the boys had lunch.
Laura's movements in the kitchen stopped as Sydney's eyes snapped up, realization dawning on them both simultaneously.
"Oh god…"
"Sydney … are – could you be…" Laura was interrupted by her daughter as her face fell into her hands, the words slipping through her fingers.
"Oh…please don't let me be pregnant."
…