Brute force is always a solution, although never a good one.

-Planeptunian proverb

Nicos was wide awake, even in the middle of night. For this night was a special one. All the large screens, signs, and billboards held a countdown that slowly ticked down; people around the city were following this process expectantly. Almost no one worked on this night

A gentle snowfall accompanied the proceedings, coating the metallic city in a coat of pure white.

The new year was but a few minutes away.

Far above everyone else, IF and Neptune were watching. From this far up high, the people below them were little bigger than ants; she could see the streetlamps and a few impromptu bonfires, as well as mages providing either light or flame for brightness and warmth.

Cold wind entered the CPUs' home through the open window, ignored by the three of them; IF was more entranced by the purplish aura that coiled around Neptune, dissipating into the air outside as it reached further from her. Neptune herself obviously could not care less.

And Histoire, who had joined them for the time being, obviously had no problem with the cold either. The Tome stayed to the side.

IF was not entirely sure what her friend was doing there, but she could guess well enough. The weather forecast had mentioned strong wind and heavy snowfall around Nicos, not the light one they were having at the moment. She assumed that Neptune was keeping the weather steady for the new year.

It was fascinating how casually a CPU could exert her will over nature. She had rarely seen it before, as Neptune did not do this too often.

Nonetheless, the purplette wore a serene smile as her eyes wandered over the many people filling the streets below. From children to elders, everyone gathered together to celebrate the arrival of a new year. "I love festivals," she chirped while turning her head this way and that.

"I agree," Histoire offered from her place on the table, sitting in a tiny chair and with a tiny mug in hand. "Everyone is in high spirits during those events. It is quite invigorating." The small woman took a sip from her tea, though she lowered the mug when Neptune began to giggle.

IF just raised an eyebrow while the CPU turned her head to meet her Oracle's eyes. "Silly Histy, I love festivals because you can't stop me from stuffing myself with pudding!" She lazily motioned for a small pile of empty plastic cups, all of them originally full. The purplette was only half-joking, they knew, but Neptune was enamored with her pudding.

In response, the Tome just shook her head; IF refrained from rolling her eyes this time. She was used to the purplette's antics by now.

It was still a little sad that Nepgear could not join them; the younger CPU had insisted on taking care of a group of Turtles that spawned in the north. Be it either so Neptune herself did not have to go, or so the airforce did not have to call their people in.

It had been surprising that the sisters did not insist on spending the whole day together like Nepgear said a few days earlier; when IF brought it up however, Neptune simply told her that Nepgear was an adult. She took her work as serious as IF herself, even if that was less visible. She would be back within two hours and they had already lazed around together in the afternoon. For Neptune, that seemed to be more than enough. IF could see why, even though she did not like the pang of envy it made her feel.

Her thoughts were interrupted by the countdown, which had reached the final stretch. It hit zero moments later, accompanied by cheers and the hissing of fireworks. The CPU and Tome shared a chuckle over the sight, then Histoire turned her head to IF with a smile. "Happy 513, Isabelle."

The brunette smiled right back. "Yeah, happy 513, Histoire, Nep." The purplette gave a thumbs-up while the blonde nodded. Truthfully, it had taken some time to get used to calling the Tome by her name in private; Histoire had insisted, so IF complied despite feeling a little odd. She definitely could not call her by a nickname like Neptune did.

Either way, a new year had finally arrived. Five hundred and thirteen years since Planeptune was founded, more than half a millennium. IF mulled that over while she watched the sky being painted in myriads of colours below her, Planeptower standing so high the fireworks did not reach beyond it. The most prominent colour was obviously purple, reminiscent of the home Neptune had created for them.

On impulse, IF poked the purplette's shoulder and offered her a smile. "Thanks for your hard work, Nep." Much different to her usual behaviour however, Neptune did not become hyper or tease her. She just smiled back.

Like this, the three of them watched the lights for a while. It was a little weird to see from above, though IF did not mind the different perspective for a change. She shivered a little under the cold air, but quickly found a blanket winding around herself. Histoire did not say anything else on the matter, though.

After a few minutes however, Neptune began to smirk while the aura permeating the air grew in power. The glow even included IF by the purplette's side; she could have told either way, knowing that nothing should taste of gentleness and mirth. That was not tastes, yet they lay on her tongue in these moments. "Nep, what are you doing?" She was not concerned, but there was a wary edge in her voice. IF knew the things that could happen when Neptune had ideas.

By their side, Histoire curiously watched the display as well. However, her expression changed to an understanding one at around the time the CPU's smirk widened; she had already analysed her partner's actions.

"Just you watch, gals! This is how CPUs do fireworks!" As if on cue, which it was, the sky brightened in purple light that bathed the entire city below them. Once it did, the hail of rockets and other fireworks ceased as people stared upward throughout Nicos.

IF also leaned closer to the window, but could not properly see anything from where she was. A few more attempts were made, but she could not figure out what her friend had done.

Not even a minute after Neptune started, IF could feel her phone vibrate. Opening it, she found Chirper, which had already been going strong with chirps about the new year, in the process of exploding over one image; Planeptunian sky, full of snow yet illuminated.

Up high, purple letters formed a neat row, wishing the people a happy new year. IF got to see it from every possible direction before closing Chirper and snapping her phone shut. When she looked up, she found the biggest grin on Neptune's face and sighed. Even though exasperated, she could not help but smile fondly. "Why am I not surprised?"

Histoire chuckled in her seat. "Oh Neptune."

The purplette nodded in satisfaction, then wiped a few beads of sweat from her forehead. "Whew, I'm beat." The light died down a moment later, as did her friend's aura. "That's it from me today." Her gaze wandered back outside, but soon returned to IF; the smirk had turned back into a smile, though this one was much softer. "Shall we get going?"

The brunette blinked before nodding quietly. She was a little confused about her friend's exhaustion, but being reminded of their plans for the night pushed the question out of her mind for now.

"If you do not mind," Histoire noted as they got up to leave, "I would rather stay and watch the fireworks." The blonde remained on her little chair, offering IF a reassuring smile as both her and Neptune nodded. They quietly left the room as the Tome rose into the air, the elevator's doors closing when she touched down on the windowsill.

Once they began their long descent, IF's mind slowly began to turn into a roller coaster.

She did not want to see these things, she really did not want to. Yet she knew she had to do this sooner or later. As much as she disliked it, she could not just let this sit. It still hurt, even after all this time.

To get her mind off of it for a little while longer, she cast another curious glance at her friend. Neptune still had this earthy scent about her, despite being sweaty and panting a little. "Did that really tire you out?" she could not help but ask.

Neptune blinked at her, then shrugged. "Yeah, it's not as easy as it looks." The purplette tilted her head and looked at the ground in thought as she recounted: "You know how us CPUs can terraform?" It was a rhetorical question, they both knew that. "Well, it is one of the few things even Candidates can't. Main CPU only, possibly because it takes so much energy. Or maybe it's arbitrary, I don't know.

"Fact is, terraforming is a powerful, powerful thing. I made it combat-capable during the war and trust me, the gals hated me for it." IF's eyebrow rose in surprise over the admission, mainly because this was the first time she ever heard Neptune bring up the Console War. The purplette continued before any questions could be asked. "It lets us rearrange the landscape on a whim, change the composition of the ground and the air, everything. Weather control is more of an extension."

The elevator's display noted that they only had another hundred storeys to go until ground level, though neither woman paid it any mind. Neptune continued after a moment of thought. "It takes a lot out of us, even with hundreds of years of practice. Same as staying transformed for longer amounts of time. Y'know, a little like you feel at the end of a long day. I can recuperate without sleep, but I'm still exhausted at the end. Weather control is easier than the rest, but the lightshow took a lot more effort. Had to change the air in the right areas, keep the gas contained there, light it up, create more as it burned out, remove the waste products, you get what I mean. Lots of finnicky bits."

IF nodded slowly, making sense of what was said without actually understanding what Neptune talked about. She doubted her ability to grasp it even if her friend had put it in exact terms. Like Nepgear said a few months ago, it was like trying to explain what magic felt like to someone who had none. They could not really understand the feeling of it flowing through one's body, focussing through even an unconcious thought. They never felt the tingling magic left when it slid over one's nerves once one began to focus it, or the disembodiment of still being connected with it once it left the body.

IF had heard it described as having an additional, unconnected limb, but that was barely adequate as a description. Her own control was so bad she barely could keep it in her grasp either way, but the amount of detailed work a seasoned mage could do was astounding.

The ding of the elevator startled her out of the tangent; at the same time, Neptune's hand snaked into her own and squeezed it gently. "We're here, let's go."

And as Isabelle turned to look at her friend, she found the purplette with a calm yet barely readable expression; she was led through underground corridors, Neptune silently reading the labels on each door they passed. Planeptower's storage area was large out of necessity, for all the bad that implied.

No words were spoken, though Isabelle took note of the light layer of dust coating the corridors; there were a few sets of footsteps in them, but not many. She could guess that they cleaned only sporadically, seeing how few people came down here.

The young woman knew all of their possessions had been stored below Planeptower for many years; this even included the furniture, which had been preserve until she was old enough to sort through it. Having to decide which to keep, however, did not feel like a good task to her. Her chest was throbbing in old emotions; Isabelle thought she was over it by now, but had to realise she was not.

Soon enough, Neptune slowed down in front of the correct door, which she opened before letting Isabelle enter first. The human woman was tempted to let her friend go ahead for a long moment, but shook it off and stepped inside.

Then she was wandering between old furniture and other belongings, neatly sorted and placed together. She tried to remember anything concrete about it, but managed no more than finding some things familiar. She felt like she recognised the pattern on that table cloth, or like she had seen this cupboard before, but her memory refused to cooperate.

Whatever might have been there was now lost to time, as well as an iron mind refusing to allow what little was left back up to be refreshed over the years.

Neptune remained in the background, though she never strayed far from Isabelle; the younger woman considered asking if she had been down here before, but figured it was not really worth talking about at the moment. The purplette kept looking around curiously either way, just like Isabelle herself.

Her steps were dull in this quiet place as she wandered, but Isabelle soon came to another halt next to a set of picture frames. They were as old as everything else, but the metal and glass had done its work in preserving the images they were guarding. Pictures of her family.

She quietly regarded a much younger her, one which she had seen on some old pictures Mari took. This Isabelle held an honest smile, still full of holes as not all her teeth had broken through just yet. Another was happily sitting in her mother's lap, the woman's face barely recognisable. She could recognise her, though; they shared enough traits to be familiar, from their hair to their facial features.

In another picture, her mother and father stood together with their hands intertwined. A young couple like so many others she saw over the years.

In the present, Isabelle felt hollow. Her eyes stung from unshed tears while her fingers ran over the pictures, back and forth, back and forth.

Taking a deep breath, she rubbed the wetness from her face and went on, Neptune quietly strolling after her. The purplette obviously knew what was going on, but mercifully kept quiet about it.

Isabelle took some time looking over her parents' belongings, investigating old jewelry and other such things carefully. At some point however, she felt Neptune pulling on her sleeve; the CPU wore a soft expression, but the lack of a smile gave the human pause.

"It's okay to be honest with yourself, you know?" The question lacked its usual pep, quiet and honest while Neptune herself took a step closer to Isabelle, who was not sure how to react. "I can tell you're still hurting." Following that, she gently brought her arms around the taller woman and pulled her into a warm embrace.

It was different from Neptune's casual hugs. There was actual strength in her arms this time, squeezing Isabelle tightly and making her feel safe; a slender hand soothingly stroked her back while she relaxed into the embrace, slowly returning it.

The aching in her chest was still there; she missed them so much more than she had admitted to herself over the years. Yet Neptune was there, holding her, ignoring her silent tears. She did not need to say anything, the purplette knew it all.

"You know, I'm the first person to blame myself for what happened to you," Neptune started. Isabelle listened quietly, comprehending yet unwilling to react. "If I'd been faster that day... but that is so long in the past, and I can't do anything about it. You and I are here now, and it happened." The words continued to come, hurting and soothing her at the same time. "Your mom and dad aren't here, and I'm sorry that I couldn't save them, too. So I'm going to say it in their stead."

With that, the warmth receded a little as Isabelle was held at arms' length, Neptune's lilac eyes wandering over her warmly. "I'm proud of you. I love you."

Then she was pulled back in, stunned as she was. Isabelle had no words to speak in response, just weak sobs as she began to cling to the CPU. Neptune kept comforting her gently and with quiet words: "You're gonna make it big, Isa. I mean it, I love you. If I actually could have kids, I'd have wanted one just like you."

Neptune's words made warmth blossom in Isabelle's chest, but her voice still failed her. She just quietly clung to the smaller woman for an instant of eternity; neither knew how much time exactly passed, and neither of them cared.

As Isabelle calmed down and her tears had began to dry, Neptune let go and held her at arms' length again. A playful smile brightened the purplette's expression. "This would be the point where I tell you that you're pushing yourself too hard, but, well, that would make me a hypocrite and you wouldn't listen, so let's not."

Isabelle nodded quietly, taking in the words but having no actual response at the moment. She quietly started to wipe the wetness off of her cheeks, but was quickly interrupted by a soft cloth handkerchief driving her sleeves away. Neptune carefully wiped her face clean, gentle from beginning to end. She continued to talk, her words making the human girl feel as if she was transparent: "I know you think it wouldn't work either way. You are who you are and you don't want to be anyone else."

Their eyes met and Isabelle averted her gaze quickly; it did not stop Neptune from speaking, though. "And you are right, in a way. I won't ask you to become someone else, either. All I want is that you don't break yourself, yes? Can you promise me that?"

The silence held for a long moment, then Isabelle nodded; her mind was in turmoil yet deadly quiet, not allowing her to talk back at the moment. As she began to push it back into order, a pair of soft hands cupped her cheeks and made her meet Neptune's lilac eyes again. The CPU was no longer smiling. "I won't tell anyone about this," she promised. "And I'll tell you a secret, too: I'm not okay either."

The admission gave Isabelle pause, but Neptune just shushed her. "Don't, please. No talky, yeah? I don't like talking about it any more than you do." Once the brunette nodded again, the purplette sighed. "It's just... this is between us. Even Nepgear has no idea and I don't want her to know. Heck, I haven't even told any of the gals." The mischievous twinkle failed to brighten Neptune's eyes this time, making Isabelle worry as she saw it. She did agree not to speak though, so she waited.

"It takes a lot more to phase one of us," Neptune finally told her thoughtfully. "But there are things that will. I haven't ever suffered from Bad End Syndrome like the other CPUs." She paused over the younger woman's lost look and explained: "It's basically the worst one of us can get. Constant flashes of imagined ruin, panic attacks... it is our equivalent to depression, I guess."

Then she shook her head and got back on topic: "Anyway, I don't have that. Never did, either." That did give Isabelle several questions, such as what the other CPUs got such a thing from, but Neptune already went on: "what I have is... in some ways worse, as it won't ever go away. I got to stare oblivion in Her eldritch face before."

The revelation made Isabelle suck in a breath; Neptune did not need to explain who she meant. The Deity of Sin herself. "The problem is... she doesn't leave. Even if you avert your gaze, even if you never come back, she is still there. Sometimes I can even hear her speak. It's not a good thing, Isa."

Neptune spoke quietly, but her eyes never left the younger one's face. "So don't forget: it's okay not to be okay. It is something you have to live with, and to make the best of. Just... don't ever give in. Do not let it win, even if 'it' is a part of you."

She left it at that and embraced Isabelle again; the brunette timidly returned the hug and just remained like that for a long while.