"Have a good night, Penelope, Derek!" she called out as Spencer unlocked their door, letting them inside. The bed situation hadn't changed from that afternoon, and she wondered how they would work things, really.

Spencer closed and locked the door while she made her way overt to the plush chair, almost collapsing onto it. "Are you still craving?" he asked gently as he knelt in front of her, taking her hands in his.

"A little. Alex does that to me. I'm sorry."

"There's nothing to be sorry for, Erin." He changed position to sit Indian style, and took off her shoes, gently rubbing her feet and calves. "I still get the cravings, bad ones. They've gotten worse since I lost Maeve."

"You didn't deserve to lose her, I'm sorry we didn't get there in time. You know that you could have taken more time off. You didn't have to rush back to the office."

"I think I did, Erin. I would have lost myself to ennui had I not. I miss her, so much." He gently set her foot back down on the floor as he began to openly cry. In that moment, Erin felt her heart break for him and she slid out of the chair to kneel next to him, wrapping him in a tight hug. His arms snaked around her waist, holding her tightly as his tears gave way to sobs. For some reason, she began to cry as well, tightening her hold on him. "We're quite the pair, aren't we?" he whispered as he helped her to her feet after long minutes had passed.

"I guess so. I didn't realize I needed to let that out. Thank you." Leaning forward, she gently kissed his cheek, needing to comfort him. His breathed fanned out against her cheek and she sighed a little, letting him lead her over to the bed. They sat softly and she curled up into him, wanting to feel sheltered for just a little while longer.

"Would you mind if I took my shower now?" he said, gently disentangling himself from her arms. She shook her head as she motioned to her back. "Ah, yes, turn a little." She did, and he gently ran the zipper down her back. His long fingers caressed her back and she bit back the moan that threatened to escape from her lips.

"I'll probably be sleeping by the time you get back in here. This air has made me quite tired." She yawned a little, trying to cover up the way her body reacted to him. Spencer nodded and picked up his night clothes before heading into the bathroom.

Once the door was closed, she released the breath she'd been holding and tugged the dress from her shoulders. Stepping out of it, she quickly hung it back on the hanger before taking off her bra and burying it in her bag. "Erin, could you…"

She gasped and whirled around, hurriedly crossing her arms across her chest. "I, I should have waited until I heard the water running," she babbled as she looked anywhere but at him.

"Where did you get that scar?"

Her entire body stiffened as she turned her head to look at him. "You would focus on that first. Alan, well, my ex-husband and I used to get into really bad fights in the first few years of our marriage. We both have such strong personalities that it took a while to learn how to compromise and live well together."

"And how did he give you that?" he asked, probing further as he came to her side, his fingers brushing against the jagged line that ran across her stomach.

"We were arguing about something stupid. He picked up a vase and it broke in his hand, cutting him. Alan was furious, and he stabbed me with one of the pieces. Luckily, it wasn't very deep and only took a few stitches to close up." The tears returned and he opened his arms, letting her rest her head against his chest.

"Shh, Erin. Did you ever talk to Rossi about that?" She nodded a little, and his arms tightened a little around her body. "And he let Alan live?"

"Yes. I wouldn't let him do anything." He nodded a little, not letting her go. "It was such a long time ago, Spencer. I'm not that girl any longer."

"No, you're all woman." The quiet reply startled her and she pulled away from him a little. "Life never let you be a girl, did it?"

"No," she whispered, wondering how he could see her so well.

"I know that feeling very well. Now, I need to grab my razor, that's what I forgot. Are you doing okay?"

She was a bit mortified that he had to ask her that, and she nodded slightly. He still didn't let her go and she listened to the rustle of clothing before feeling him tug a nightgown over her head and she slipped her arms into the sleeves, letting it fall down around her knees. "Thank you."

"You're welcome." They let go of each other and he rummaged through one of his bags to get his razor before heading back in the bathroom. Erin took a few deep breaths to try and calm her racing heart and she made her way over to the bed, pulling back the covers and climbing in. The mattress was firm, like she liked it, and she fluffed the pillows before snuggling into it, bringing the covers up to her chin.

And then she tried to get to sleep. She was tired, the bone weary exhaustion that came from emotional honesty gnawing at her brain. Yet try as she might, she couldn't drift off, couldn't give over to sleep. Her mind was racing a mile a minute, trying to think of ways to save face with Spencer. It wasn't so much that he's seen her body as it was he had seen her soul. Erin would rather have had him leer, stare, comment on her breasts, her hips, anything but bring up the scar on her torso.

Spencer's look had left her vulnerable, so vulnerable, and she longed to take a drink of something that would make her forget how his look made her feel. Emotional nudity was still something that she was becoming accustomed to, and Erin knew she had to deal with how she was feeling at some point.

When the door to the bathroom reopened, she still had not fallen asleep and she turned on her side to watch him put away his things. "In the morning, I'll help you get everything put away in the drawers and closet. I hate feeling like I live out of bags." He met her eye and smiled and she found herself smiling back, beckoning him over to the bed. "I thought you were tired."

"So did I. I can't sleep, and I don't know why." He nodded and got into bed, letting his arm drape over her waist, running his thumb up and down her side as he just looked into her eyes. The sorrow she found there seemed to reflect the sadness in her own heart and she found her smile wobbling a little as she let him pull her close.

"I miss Maeve. More than I ever thought I would. I was so used to thinking that love was nothing more than a social construct."

"And then it happened to you. Real, true, love, the kind that can gut you in a heartbeat, if you let it. Oh, I remember that feeling. I had thought I would find that again in David, but I was wrong, so wrong. We're better off as friends, and there's still this hole in my heart."

"Just like there's a hole in mine." She nodded a tiny bit and he lifted his head to gently kiss her forehead. The tender gesture calmed her and she snuggled into him, needing the warmth that he exuded. "Go to sleep now, Erin. Everything will be clearer in the morning."

"I certainly hope so," she said through a yawn, curling her hand around his shoulder as she let her eyes close and sleep finally took over.