Weaver

by The Lucky Lady

Mahrig, a woman who suffered a life of imprisonment in Cyrodiil due to the mysterious nature of her birth, has fled to Skryim to begin a new life. After a series of events that leads to her near execution and destruction of a town, she is joined by A Paladin named Gareth. Gareth soon finds himself battling self doubt and regret as Mahrig struggles to find a place in the world.

15. Sun's Dusk

Disclaimer: I do not own any rights to the Elder Scroll Series.

Chapter 15: Sun's Dusk

Gareth

16th of Sun's Dusk, Solitude

Mahrig often crossed my mind in the two months of her absence. Little things would remind me of her. The giggle of the children that lined the large stone streets of Solitude is what had made me think of her recently. It reminded me of the way she would giggle at my attempts at sarcasm, which led me to think of her long locks of ashen blonde hair that almost looked Silver in the candlelight, or her Ivory skin that seemed to glow as she would bask under the dim light of the night skies. I sat in the Winking Skeever Inn sipping on the mountain flower tea that the inn keeper had suggested. The warm hearth blazed, warming the chill that had creeped into my bones from being so far up North. I was followed by the templars for two weeks before they disembarked. I assumed they had hoped that I would lead them to Mahrig, but in reality it was I that hoped I could follow them to her.

I did end up following them for a short time after their departure of my surveillance. They travelled vigorously, never stopping to take care of any problems that presented themselves. Cleaning up their neglect of the bandit ridden roads of Skyrim had caused me to lose them rather early in my efforts. I had given up hope of ever finding Mahrig until rumors began to spread. The College of Winterhold had a new Arch Mage named Tolfdir, not the first choice. Rumor spread that Tolfdir was appointed Arch mage after someone else Declined the position. This "someone else" used their Thu'um to aid in protecting The College of Winterhold. I wasn't sure if the stories were true, but I couldn't think of anyone else that could shout like a dragon, besides Ulfric Stormcloak. There would be no possible way he would have taken an interest in the college though, and only Mahrig would be humble enough to turn down such a position. Mahrig had been very busy in her efforts to forge an alliance with a very powerful group to ensure her permanent residence in Skyrim. No doubt her high standing with the college would deter the lesser branches of Kvatch officials. My only fear was that they would send higher ranking men and women after her, not just Templars.

It was clear that she didn't want me to find her. Whatever she had done in her past life had caught up to her, and she left me behind with her fear of being caught. That day in Shore's Stone felt like an eternity ago, but something inside of me hoped that she would walk back into my life as swiftly as she had left. Theo had no doubt went with her, he never returned. I couldn't exactly look for them at the time. I had no idea that they had left for good. I simply thought maybe Mahrig had taken Theo with her to lay low. I was wrong. No matter how far I had traveled no one had seen her or the peculiar man I described as Theo.

It was in Ivarstead that I decided she had left for good. Her efforts to learn more about her inborn gift of being the Dragonborn were forgotten when the Templars had arrived. No one in Ivarstead had seen the two prepare for travel up the seven thousand steps. I offered to carry supplies to the top for a man named Klimmek. He claimed to take the steps once every month to provide the Greybeards with supplies. I offered to make the trip for him that time. Deep down I knew it was because I hoped that Mahrig would be at the top, fulfilling her destiny. I met a few people on pilgrimages along the treacherous path that led to the top. It almost pained me to hear of the absence of two travelers while in their journey and meditation up on the mountain. I had to face the fact that Mahrig wasn't there.

I prayed to the divines night after night. There were never any answers, but I was often taught as a young man that if ever the Divines did not answer, it was because I was asking the wrong questions, or was simply missing the signs. I almost gave up, until I began hearing the rumors about a week ago. I was convinced that if Kynareth wanted me to continue my journey with Mahrig, then she would give me a sign, and she did. She gave me a few actually in the form of two women scurrying through the city of Whiterun. Rumors about the new college Archmage Tolfdir and his Dragonborn Master Wizard surfaced fast considering most of the people in Skyrim disliked the college. I almost left immediately after hearing the shopping rush hour chatter, but a completely different line of overheard dialogue stopped me. According to a passing courier a dragon had been spotted on the peak of the mountain above Solitude.

Mahrig may have given up the chance to learn more about her dragon blood, but she wouldn't turn her cheek to rumors of dragons. I had seen the fierce level of hatred she felt toward the beasts, and knew in an instant that Solitude is where she would be heading to if she caught wind of it. That's how I ended up in the Winking Skeever, sipping my tea. I arrived the day before and just waited. Mahrig would no doubt visit the city first to get the specifics, and I would be waiting for her.

I sat in my chair by the hearth, sloshing the last bit of tea in my mug around. Many bards littered the inn. Solitude was home to the Bard's College, so it was no surprise that a few of them spent their evenings practicing their arts on the ears of the tavern patrons. I didn't mind the sound, a few bards compared skill, while a few others that gathered in a corner battled for the small audience that had gathered around them. The people of Solitude didn't seem to mind throwing around their gold for entertainment. I guess it happened everywhere, I just noticed it more in a heavily populated area. The evening crowd was growing as the work day was coming to an end. Many guards sat in the inn ordering beverages and food, while numerous merchants that I recognized ordered beverages before returning to their families.

A few men disappeared with the less than dignified female entertainment to the top floors of the inn. I knew that the night ahead of me would be filled with the similar sounds I had heard the previous night. The thick fur cover's and feathered pillows that covered my rooms bed would come in handy once again. Finishing my last bit of tea I stood. I made my way toward the bar where the owner, Corpulus Vinius, made eye contact with me. He knew fully well that a Paladin did not condone such acts, but it was legal and only considered morally wrong. A big part of his business was made through the exchange of money for sexual favors by his many tavern women. Since the Civil War began more women flocked to the profession with the loss of family, suitors, or husbands. I did not judge these women for what they had to do to support themselves or their families, but I couldn't imagine being a customer of a woman who thought that was something she had to do to survive.

Corpulus took my mug and gave me a small smile. I returned the gesture and headed for the stairs. In my room I sat at the small table on the far side of the room and picked up reading where I had left off earlier that morning. The Wolf Queen Vol. 1 had caught my eye on the small shelves that lined the wall. There were a few other volumes of The Wolf Queen present in corresponding order and some other miscellaneous reading material, but reading The Wolf Queen just seemed fitting considering Potema, the Wolf Queen, once occupied the Blue Palace in Solitude.

Reading was something I used to do often as a young lad in training. Many Scholars would pass through the Priories I sought residence in. In return for services of cooking and shelter for the night they would sometimes pay me in books instead of gold. My father had taught me to read at a young age, and I'm thankful that he did. Reading was an escape from reality, something that I often found myself drawn to, especially recently since coming to Solitude. The sounds I could hear coming from the other rooms were easily forgotten with a good book. That is, until a familiar voice registered above the combination of noises coming from the hall.

Mahrig

"I thought you said we would be in and out." Theo exclaimed loudly as the barkeep showed us to our room. Normally I would have rented seperate rooms for Theo and I, but the Barkeep had informed us that his inn was booked due to visiting wedding guests for the town's very own Vittoria Vici, cousin of the Emperor and high ranking business woman within the East Empire Trade Company. I knew of her from a recent trip I had made to Solitude, she had been planning her wedding then. Now it would seem her long awaited wedding day was quickly approaching. I was happy for her. She was in fact a hard worker, and very kind considering most Imperials that dwelled within the harsh climates of Skyrim.

"I know what I said Theo, but I didn't realize your little detour through an ancient Spriggan infested glade would cause us to lose so much time. We'll rest tonight and find out what we can in the morning." I tried to ease Theo's nerves, but he wouldn't comply, and in turn made me regret even renting a room.

"I really don't like crowds Mahrig, maybe we should just stay in our room and snuggle or something. That will keep the tension away." I turned swiftly to glare over my shoulder at the teasing Theo before entering the room that the barkeep had designated as ours.

Relief washed over me at the sight of two beds instead of one. It was a smaller room considering the lush luxuries of The Winking Skeever. A room that was no doubt meant for common folk instead of visiting nobles. I sighed and sat my bag down on the bed closest to the door. Theo tossed a few gold to the Barkeep and shut the door. He slung his bag across the room. Surprisingly it landed on the bed without spilling it's contents. A new bounce entered his step as he came to my side while I rummaged through my bag for a new pair of clothes.

"So, you didn't say no to snuggling." Theo beamed a smile in my direction. In all that I learned at the College of Winterhold, still nothing helped me deal with Theo. His flirtations had increased recently, putting me on edge. I didn't mind the compliments and flattery, but what woman did? It was nice to be complimented, but at some point I fear I had given Theo the wrong signals. We spent quite a lot of time apart while I attended classes at the college. He did however accompany me many times on business I had away from the college. In his spare time he even learned a few new spells which impressed me considering he didn't really seem to care too much for anything besides his nature spells.

"Theo, we need to find you a hobby." He chuckled at my reply and spoke.

"I already have a beautiful hobby, one that many men are jealous of dear." Theo's smile grew as I felt the heat seep into my cheeks.

"I'm not a hobby, and no one is jealous. If you don't mind I'm going to bathe." Theo's smile turned into a full on grin at my reply.

"Can I join you?" I snorted at his persistence.

"In your dreams Theo. Since you hate people so much maybe you should stay in the room." Theo sighed with humor.

"Ah, very well my dear. Maybe one day you will finally submit to me my flower." I scoffed at his use of my newfound nickname, " Flower." I had guessed that my obsession with collecting herbs for experiments while in our travels contributed to the nickname. I didn't mind much, but having a nickname reminded me of someone I tried my best not to think about.

My Lady… I found myself replaying those words in my head often. Pain normally followed the memories, but I couldn't look back to the past, not in a moment like this. I done what I had to do then, and it brought me here. A free woman, educated in all branches of magics, creating a life for myself in Skyrim. The things that often haunted me most, were the fears I had of how Gareth perceived me after his run in with the Templars.

I guess my face had taken on an image to mirror my thoughts, because Theo's grin disappeared as he creased his brow.

"Hey, Mahrig I'm only jesting. What's wrong?" He tilted my chin so that our eyes met. I blinked rapidly and clutched the blue silk dress in my hands I had chosen before putting on my best smile.

"Nothing, nothing at all. Everything has just been a blur at the college recently. I guess my mind was trying to figure out how things went so badly so quickly." I made a small gulping sound, hoping that Theo would buy my story. His features didn't indicate any change.

"I really haven't had time to ponder anything with all that has happened. We dealt with it as it came and didn't really have time to plan all the unexpected trips and races against time. I'm just glad its over." Theo shrugged and stepped closer placing his hand on my shoulder.

"Well in that case you should be smiling. You landed a great spot among the college." I sighed and shook my head, secretly relieved that Theo humored me on this.

"We lost a lot of good people after the Thalmor ambassador ran mad with power over our discovery of The Eye of Magnus. I never intended to increase my rank by those means." Theo's smile turned to one of sympathy.

"Mahrig, there was nothing you could do. It's not wise to be a milk drinker in these lands. So don't cry over spilled milk." Theo's words made me want to smile, but the subject was still a bit touchy. I had covered up a painful memory with another one. I shook it off and turned toward the door.

"I assume this discussion is over?" Theo's voice sang from behind me. I glanced back to see him crossing his arms and plopping down onto the edge of my bed.

"Yes, it is." I replied.

"Anything I can do to help lift your spirits a bit?" Theo winked before I turned back toward the door.

"If you're feeling so generous, how about you have a sweet roll waiting for me when I come back?" I answered only half serious.

"I thought we went over this, I don't like crowds." Theo retorted. I opened the door and turned for one last reply.

"Hey, you offered remember? Anything that will lift my spirit." I smiled and left.

By the Nine. I waited in the tavern for almost an hour before finally being able to use the bathing room. My recent thoughts had guided me toward a few mugs of Alto Wine while I waited. Two people were ahead of me, and everyone thought it best to take their time, so when I finally entered the room I decided to relax and do the same. Another reason I took my time was because of the dizziness I encountered when moving too quickly. I sat down the bottle of red wine I had purchased after finishing my two mugs of Alto wine. Red wine didn't taste quiet as well, but it was cheaper to buy in the bottle, and in that moment I needed it. I watched as a few people brought in buckets of fresh hot water to pour into the stone tub. I waited patiently sipping on my wine. The sound of the drain beneath the tub rushed with water below. I sat in silence until the group returned with more water. It took a few trips, but eventually the tub was full and I was presented with a fresh bath. I guess the waiting was worth it. Unlike most taverns in Skyrim there was a limit to how many times bath water could be used before it was changed. This was probably due to the populated Imperial presence within Solitude. Their bathing practices were much more sanitary than the Nords. I personally didn't mind bathing after a few people, but there had been a few taverns where I had decided to wait and bathe in a river or stream because of how murky the bathhouse water was. A shiver passed through my body at the thought causing me to involuntarily giggle as I slid my body into the tub.

By the end of my bath I couldn't tell whether the heat was coming from my flushed drunken state or the water. I was engulfed in a warmness that wasn't necessarily physical, but emotional. My earlier thoughts were just echoes in the halls of my mind. My drunk mind fumbled with the mechanics it would take to dress myself properly. My slurred speech was almost inaudible as I peeked my head outside of the room to inquire a barmaid for help. A flash of something familiar crossed my vision. A silver chest plate that I couldn't quite place in my memories. The sight was gone as soon as the barmaid shut the door behind her and attempted to help me dress. The chestplate was forgotten, until my drunken mind slipped into sleep once I returned to my room.

My dreams were filled with dark halls. I was in a lighted area that seemed to sway and mix with the darkness that lay at the edge of each entrance. Four halls surrounded me, I sat in the lit intersection. I gazed into the darkness of each hall, trying to figure out where I was. My mind did not realize at the time that I was dreaming, and so my panic was real as the silver glint of steel caught my attention. Someone was approaching me from one of the halls. I kept my attention astute on the approaching figure. The light danced around the features, never giving me a clear view, but I heard the familiar deep voice. My lady… It was only a whisper, but it was enough to send me running down the opposite hall. I ran blindly, trying to disappear from the one person that I missed most. I couldn't return now, or ever.

I kept running until the light behind me from the intersection of halls faded and the dim light of a torch appeared in front of me. One torch became two, two became three and so on, until I realized I was heading toward a group of men and women. The group of Templars I had spent most of my free years evading. I tried to stop running, but my legs wouldn't listen. I grew closer to the group dressed in Templar attire. My breathing was not ragged from running. It was the terror that was slowly seeping into my dreaming mind. My body involuntarily pushed forward, as my fears tried to pull me away. I felt something hard and cold grab my shoulder and stop my movement. The shock from the foreign feeling jolted me awake, but not before I turned to see Emerald eyes. After waking up I wasn't sure if the shock had been from the armored hand, or the eyes that I had seen.

I woke in a cold sweat, my hair clung to my face. The sick feeling that washed over me signaled my need to find a bucket, and soon. Thankfully Theo had observed my drunken state upon my return and already prepared. I didn't like to admit it, but this was a normal occurrence. Once a week I would be careless and spiral into a drunken mess, while Theo safeguarded my fragile and vulnerable self. It wasn't something I was proud of, but my life wasn't exactly sunshine and red mountain flowers. I was thankful however that my past indulgences had prepared Theo for this moment. Out of the corner of my eye I saw Theo swing his legs over the side of his bed and grab the nearby bucket he had set aside, no doubt for a moment like this. I grabbed the bucket without a word, and buried my face. I swore lightly under my breath between my gasps for air after each interval of my stomach emptying its contents. I didn't dare look at Theo. I couldn't bare to see or even imagine another disapproving look from a friend.

Gareth crossed my mind as another wave of nausea hit, sending convulsions through my abdomen muscles. I sat gasping for air, remembering the voice I had heard in my dream. Gareth's voice, and eyes haunted me. I straightened my back and Theo looked me over. I could tell from the corner of my eye that he was observing the mess before him.

"Too much wine again my flower?" I nodded slowly wrapping my arm around my stomach as I clutched the bucket with my other arm. It wasn't safe to put the bucket down yet. I had made that mistake before and poor Theo had paid the price.

Theo made his way over to the small water basin and dipped a cloth rag inside. He brought the rag back to me and offered it. When I felt safe enough I distanced myself from the bucket and accepted the rag. I wiped my brow, face and finally my mouth, giving the rag back to him when I finished. Theo discarded the rag on a dresser and came back to sit at the edge of my bed. I sat the bucket in the floor and sat back up to meet Theo's gaze.

"When will you learn you can't find happiness in a bottle?" I shrugged at his words.

"I don't do it to find happiness. I just like a little escape is all. I'm always so on edge, you can understand why I'm sure. I've told you about the people who keep looking for me." Theo nodded slowly.

"Yes, but you never did this before…" Theo's words trailed off as he tried to figure out a way to word his thoughts.

"What I'm trying to say is, you didn't have this problem before we hightailed it away from the Rift after you saw the Templars." I didn't want to talk about my problems, but it was quite clear that Theo did.

"It's not like that. The college put a lot of stress on me is all." I shrugged and laid back against the wooden headboard of my bed. Theo shook his head slightly.

"So that's why this started before we even made it to the college? This began in Windhelm Mahrig. You drank most of the Nords under the table and almost ended up in one of their beds." I frowned as a blush heated the cold clammy skin of my cheeks.

"That's not what I intended to do. I had no desire to sleep with that man. I just got a little carried away with the singing and dancing and he got the wrong idea." Theo gave me a sly glance before turning his attention to the footsteps that seemingly paced the hall on the other side of the door. It seemed that we weren't the only ones that couldn't sleep. He turned his attention back to me as he spoke.

"I didn't say that was your intention, I just meant that alcohol gets you into trouble, and right now you don't need anymore trouble." I nodded slowly. A bit of irritation entered my emotions at Theo's patronizing speech. Theo sighed and leaned in to catch my gaze. His deep mahogany eyes seemed to search my own for the source of my behavior.

"I don't mean to sound course, or bring up anything, but I realize what's hurting you." Theo raised his eyebrow looking for a response as he spoke. I sat quietly and listened no longer hearing the footsteps outside of the room.

"You left a friend when we departed. You didn't get to say goodbye. I'm no expert on the subject, but I imagine not saying goodbye and just leaving without notice can weigh on a person's conscience." I sighed as Theo spoke.

"Do we really have to revisit my shortcomings?" I asked.

"Yes we do Mahrig, because obviously something is bothering you, and while many things bother you, nothing before that incident had led you to drinking, at least not as heavily as you do now. I say we get your feelings out on the table, so we can put this behind us." Theo crossed his arms and tried to give me a stern look. He wasn't going to back down, so the only two choices I had was to either put him out of the room for the night or hear him out and comply with his terms. With as shaky as my body had become from the weakness I felt, putting him out of the room would be a long shot.

"Gareth was a dear friend, and I hid a lot from him. I'm the bad guy here. I wouldn't blame him if he hated me. So really there is nothing to talk about. I'm sure you probably already knew how I felt, but making me say them out loud isn't going to change anything." I stared down at my shaking hand that rested on my covered knee.

"Mahrig, that's just it. How could Gareth hate you for doing nothing wrong? Unless you lied to me, those people had no reason to be holding you prisoner. Who imprisons children? Hell, who imprisons babies?" I shook my head after he spoke.

"No, he would hate me because I never told him. He shared a lot about his childhood with me, and even his years as a teen. I couldn't give him more about myself because I was afraid he might figure me out and turn me in or something. He probably hates me, because the people his order is associated with probably made up lies about me. There is no way to know what they tell people about me to scare information out of them. I know they won't tell the truth about imprisoning me without ever giving me a reason. I grew up in imprisonment, it was all I knew." Tears began streaming down my face, and Theo's demeanor changed. Before I knew what was happening I felt Theo press my face against his chest. My sobbing involuntarily grew louder as Theo soothed and shushed me.

"No, that Paladin was a lot of things, and I still think he's a jerk, but he could never hate you. Even if by some twisted chance he did harbor ill feelings toward you, it wouldn't be hate." Theo patted my sweat dampened hair as he spoke.

"Speaking of shortcomings my flower, he had a lot of them, but that man seemed to care for you more so than he cared for himself. That says a lot about a person. Him and I didn't get along, but that was partly my fault for being too forward with you." I sniffed rapidly to keep my blubbering mess from soiling Theo's shirt. I pulled away and glanced up at him. His eyes were not on me. They rested on a small spot of his pant leg where he had attempted to patch a hole. I had promised over and over again to fix it properly, but instances like this and other chaotic events in my life kept leading me to forget. I always felt so guilty for everything I did. It didn't matter how small or big my discretions were, the guilt played out the same.

Theo's words, whether meant to calm my worries or were genuinely how he perceived things, did not go unnoticed. His lighthearted approach to describing Gareth surprised me considering their last encounters before our departure. It was clear to me that Theo had pondered the subject often, whereas I had avoided thinking about it as much as possible, which I will admit had lead to a string of drinks I consumed in the past. Theo knew what he was talking about, or at least he had prepared this lecture long before I was willing to admit to my own woes. Being more prepared for the matter led me to feel inclined to Theo's view on things. Even so, I couldn't return to Gareth. I had caused him so much pain and then up and vanished without a trace. I wouldn't have forgiven him, so why should he forgive me?

"I hurt him." I whimpered. Theo creased his brow and slowly rubbed my shoulder to soothe the tears that had already swelled my eyes once more.

"Everyone hurts everyone. It happens." Theo replied in a low voice.

"No, I hurt him. I let that bandit mutilate his body. I could have shouted sooner, but I was too afraid with Gareth so close. I begged the man to stop, but he didn't listen. I know if I had tried I could have done more. Gareth was only in that position because I willingly put him there." Theo shook his head as I spoke.

"No, you didn't get him caught Mahrig. His big bulky armor did the trick." He snorted trying to lighten the mood, but it didn't work.

"I hastily agreed to your plan without much thought." Theo flinched at my words.

"I'm not saying it's your fault. No, Gareth always let me make the calls. I made that call, you only presented the idea. It was all we had and I wanted to deal with them quickly." I shrugged.

"All of that happened because of me." Theo had silently been shaking his head as I spoke.

"No my flower, that wasn't your fault. I don't think Gareth thought so either. If you could have seen the look in his eyes when he came back to take care of the leader, you would have known he wasn't doing it because of the torture he endured. He did it because of what that bastard did to you. I've never seen a man look so fierce, and for a moment I thought he would take me out too." Theo chuckled as I stared at him with wide curious eyes. He brushed his hand through his sand colored hair.

"For an instant I actually feared the man." I sighed as Theo spoke. I had been too wrapped up in my own emotional baggage to notice much of what transpired after Gareth had taken me away from the campsite. I found my next words easier to say as Theo's own admissions were out in the open.

"I told myself Gareth would be better off without having to tag along with me. He saw it as his duty, but I saw it as blindly following someone that could get him killed, and I almost did get him killed. I kept telling myself he would be happier and safe if he wasn't with me. That was the only thing that kept me from turning back and trying to convince him of my innocence after I fled when the Templars arrived."

Theo let out a long sigh after I spoke. He snorted and turned his attention to his own bed, his eyes were lost in thought for a moment before he replied.

"You did it out of love. No one can blame you for that." Theo glanced back up at me, with an expression I didn't recognize. A sudden racket outside of our door caused both of us to jolt upward off of the bed. Heavy footsteps quickly hurried down the hall. Theo bolted for the door and peered out. When I looked to the area beside his feet I noticed a vase had been knocked from the table near our door outside in the hallway. The porcelain vase was shattered, and the beautiful floral arrangement lay in disarray on the wet floor.

Gareth

The cold night air of Solitude soothed the burning heat that formed in my cheeks as I walked the darkened streets. I had shamefully been eavesdropping when I heard the conversation between Mahrig and Theo unfold. It hadn't been my intention to eavesdrop and it wasn't a habit I wanted to exhibit ever again on unsuspecting people who had done nothing wrong. I just couldn't bring myself to knock on the door and face Mahrig. I had so many questions, and some were answered, and even more had been realized. Theo had said Mahrig made her decisions out of love, but I never imagined her capable of having those type of feelings for me. She had revealed a side of herself to me that she showed no one else but that just meant we had forged a strong friendship, and with friendship comes a form of love. That must have been what Theo meant.

I argued with my thoughts for a long time as I travelled the deserted streets. The lack of guards patrolling the streets was rather peculiar for such a large city, especially in times of Civil War. I was in the residential area before I realized how distracted my thoughts had made me. Upon turning back onto the main street I peered down the long valley that extended past the Bard's College and lead to the brightly illuminated Blue Palace. One of my questions was answered. The palace garden and walls were heavily populated with guards toting torches and weapons. It would seem most of the security had been diverted from the streets to the palace, and rightfully so with the war growing in intensity by the days. Solitude was the main base of operations for the Imperial Legion. General Tullius operated from the Citadel within the city arranging scout squads and his different branches of armies that spread across the land of skyrim. Couriers and even legion men delivered orders to different hidden encampments all across the land. Solitude was where the strategy come from, ordered from the very top, and so Solitude was a high priority for Ulfric's Stormcloak rebellion.

I rubbed my hand through my disheveled unkempt hair. Prior to two months ago I would have slicked it back in an acceptable fashion with my herbal oils, but I rarely found the motivation to keep up my appearance. The stubble my hand found while rubbing across my features was proof enough that my discipline was slipping. I realized previously after my separation from Mahrig what was happening, but I never admitted it to myself. I sighed deeply and continued walking. I couldn't return to The Winking Skeever just yet. There was no way I would be able to tell if Theo and Mahrig had exited the room after I had foolishly knocked over the vase while spying. My surprise at Theo's words had sent a shock through my body causing me to jerk. My gauntlet caught the table causing it to jar, and the vase was knocked off balance causing a loud crashing sound as it hit the floor. Panic had filled me. I knew I was going to be caught, so instead of returning to my room I headed for the stairs. The stairs had been my closer option, and I wasn't ready to face Mahrig. Not with the confusing emotions that surfaced after seeing her drown herself in wine, or hearing the reason she thought I would hate her.

I walked a while longer, hoping things would calm down at the inn. I wanted to be sure Mahrig and Theo returned to bed before I made my way back to my room. I didn't want to chance any awkward meeting. Most of all I didn't want Mahrig to panic and run away from me. The thought almost terrified me. As to why I couldn't guess. I needed to find a way to let Mahrig know I wasn't mad, more importantly I wanted her to know that I would do everything in my power to protect her from the people she feared. My only regret in doing so, would be the act of going against my own order, The Knights of the Nine. I'm sure that if the path I had chosen was the wrong one, then the Gods would have intervened, that or my emotions toward Mahrig were clouding my judgment. I could only pray that Kynareth would allow me to protect her. If she didn't, I wasn't sure where my allegiance would stand, and this did terrify me.