A/N: I just checked my followers today, and can I just say holy crap. There are some legends there! These are people who's stories I read and reread, often thinking to myself, 'how the hell do you even'. I'm sure a lot of you, readers and writers alike, have seen traces of their influence on my writing style. I'm not going to pretend everything on here is some purely original thought,because it's not. I believe you have to give respect to those that came before you.
It's a huge honor to be followed by you, and by everyone else for that matter. I don't want to name names because its always awkward leaving some people out, but like I said, I'm sure everyone can see your influence on my work; and honestly the different ficwriters styles and ideas have blended so much in my mind over the years that its hard to tell what came from whom exactly.
So thanks. Enough gushing. Here's the story.
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9.57PM, Washington D.C.
"This is where you chose to take me? It doesn't even have a name." Diana said as she passed Steve the helmet.
"Yeah it does, it just doesn't have a big neon sign flashing it. It's called Maverick's. What, you think I was going to take you to some fancy restaurant someplace? In bike leathers? They wouldn't let us in. Besides, that's exactly where you go when you want to get hounded by the media. Dives like this, most people don't even know they exist."
He walked over to the door and held it open with an outstretched hand.
"After you Princess." She stepped in and he followed suit.
"You don't like it?"He asked with mild concern.
"I like it. It is a welcome break from the sterile, brightly lit restaurants I have been going to ever since I got here. And I'm glad to be wearing something other than an evening gown. How did you learn of this place?"
"It's a very popular hang out for military types. These types of bars started after the Vietnamese and Cold wars. Most veterans couldn't have a drink in peace without being insulted or bugged with endless questions,so they opened their own bars, and they only admitted men and women who were either in the military or were still serving. This one was opened in the late 80's. These days a lot of Special Forces types hang out at these spots because of the discretion. There's a ton of places like this around the country. Hundreds more around the world. But this is my favorite spot."
"May I ask why?"
"Well, I could say its because this particular bar is frequented largely by Air Force servicemen. But really its because they have some of the tastiest, greasiest food I've ever eaten."
Diana surveyed their surroundings. The room was filled almost exclusively with men, and most of them wore some variation of personalized leather bomber jacket similar to Steve's. Many of them had dog tags displayed prominently about their necks. A lot of them were fairly pedestrian in appearance, not what one would expect hardened veterans to look like. But for every 'normal' looking veteran; there was a muscle bound,scarred, tattooed,bearded gung-ho Commando type.
The walls were lined with numerous photographs and plaques of fallen soldiers,alongside banners,crests and group shots from various sports teams and military regiments. Behind the bar, above the extensive drinks cabinet that was stocked with all manner of exotic liqours, was a Winchester rifle. Across the room there were more guns from every age mounted on the wall. Some were antique muskets and flintlock pistols with ornately engraved iron stocks. Others were sniper and assault rifles with laser sights,scopes,rails and hand guards that even Diana's untrained eyes recognized as sophisticated modern weapons. Almost all of the furniture was bolted down, which said a lot about the kind of people that frequented Maverick's.
Steve scanned the crowd out of habit, spotting a familiar face.
"Hold on, I think I know that guy. Excuse me, do I know you?"
The man was also wearing a leather bomber jacket. He was roughly Steve's height but he had a slightly leaner build and his hair was dark brown. He didn't even bother turning away from the woman he was speaking to.
"I doubt it pal." He continued talking to the woman, who giggled.
"You sure? You seem really familiar."
"Look man, I'm just trying to have a good time here-" the man began in a somewhat irritated tone as he turned to face Steve.
Then he stopped. He looked a little shocked. He glanced at Diana and his brown eyes widened considerably.
"Excuse me. I need to...use the little boys room." The man quickly rose from his seat and went towards the bathroom. The lady at the bar gave Steve and Diana a dirty look before moving away from them.
"Well, that was odd." Steve commented as they settled into their booth.
"I think he recognized me." Diana said worriedly.
"It's fine. These guys can keep their mouths shut. Didn't you find that odd?"
"Perhaps he was just nervous."
"Yeah..." He didn't sound convinced at all.
"Perhaps he is one of those fake soldiers you told me about. The ones that hang out at bars to get free drinks and pity pussy."
"In this place? They'd clock a civilian in zero seconds flat. And how would a civilian find this place anyway? Wait, did you say pity pussy? I don't remember using those words. You probably shouldn't use that in public. Or ever. Where did you learn that anyway?"
"Television. Technically I am a civilian too Steve, and I know this bar."
"Yeah, I guess you're right. But still..."
"Enough! Let us eat. I am ravenous."
He shook his head as one who was clearing a fog from his mind.
"You're always ravenous. So, what'll you have?" He asked as he picked up his menu. A matronly looking waitress with her hair tied in a bun approached them.
Diana studied her options.
"What is the Eggscellent Challenge?"
"A 12 egg omelette with cheese,eggs,peppers,tomatoes and ham, served with a large steak,biscuits,onion rings,and a bowl of chilli cheese fries. It has to be finished in under an hour." said the waitress.
"I think I'll have that. And the largest pitcher of beer to wash it down." The waitress raised an eyebrow skeptically but said nothing, obviously doubting that a petite woman like Diana could put away so much.
"I'll have the steak with chilli cheese fries, and a bottle of Bud Light."
"Coming right up."
"Do I get a prize if I finish it?" Diana asked Steve.
"I don't know. I guess we'll find out. No one's ever finished it before."
"So."
"So?"
"Well, get on with the story!"
"Jeez Diana. Ever heard of foreplay?"
"There's a time and place for that. We're here, lets do what we came here to do."
"Wow. Ok. Where do I start?"
"At the very beginning."
"Well, I was literally raised in the cockpit. My mom signed up at 23 actually, but we can forgive General Dunford for telling a little white lie. Anyway, because of the nature of her work we travelled around a lot from base to base. It was an interesting, if fragmented life. Went to a lot of places. Somehow she was always stationed at the best bases, I think she knew someone on the inside. I lived in Germany,Hawaii, Italy and even Hungary. I never got to keep friends for more than a few years, so I became something of a loner. I spent a lot of time with the mechanics,engineers and maintenance men whenever they were fixing, building or modifying things. It was all very interesting to me. By the time I was 14 I could strip and reassemble most small aircraft engines with little assistance. My mom, thank god, recognized my interest, and whenever she wasn't out flying, she would teach me everything she could about piloting."
The waitress returned with the pitcher of beer, two mugs, and Steve's beer.
"You'd better not try to drink this young lady under the table Trevor." She said as she waggled her finger at him.
"I wouldn't dream of it Patricia." Steve said with a smile.
"Good. Your meals will be ready soon."
"Thank you." Diana said.
"Where was I? Oh yeah. So she would teach me about piloting. When I was 15,she taught me how to drive. I flew my first craft, a Littlebird, around the base a few months later. Mom got in a lot of trouble for that." He smiled bashfully at the memory. "When I turned 16, I discovered girls. Started hanging out with the wrong kind of people. We kind of drifted apart. Basically I got stupid as teenagers do. My mom had me when she was pretty young, so that didn't help things at all. I used to think she resented me for holding her back somehow. I realize now that was never the case. But no matter how bad our relationship got, we always shared a love for the skies. That never changed."
He paused and took a sip of his beer.
"My mom disappeared a few years later, just before my 18th birthday. Her jet just...went off the radar. She was assumed KIA after a while, which means killed in action. You'll notice I don't talk about my father. Never knew the guy. Don't really want to. I don't even know if he's still alive. Anyway, I enlisted immediately after I got back from the memorial."
The waitress appeared with their food. She sensed the tension in the air and departed quickly without a word.
Diana dug into the food right away, as did Steve. Both saw no need to speak. They ate in silence for a long while. When Steve was finished and looked up all that was left of Diana's steak was the bone, and the omelette was gone, as were the bacon rashers. It was like she inhaled her food. He looked at her face. Not a stain on it. He wondered if all of that was going to come out of the other end. It was a thought that he banished from his mind immediately. No man wants to visualize the woman he is courting taking a massive shit.
"How?"
She smiled with her mouth full,swallowed and dabbed at her mouth with a paper towel before answering.
"Well, this is only a theory, but... I have observed that Amazons are several times stronger and faster than humans, and our stamina and durability is much higher as well. As a result of that we have rapid metabolisms. So rapid we do not even produce waste. The...egestion of waste was one of the biggest surprises I encountered when I first came to Man's World. Because of my Olympian heritage I do not actually need sustenance, but growing up on Themyscira I learned to love food."
"Oh."
I won't have to worry about any awkward bathroom moments. I wonder if she... No, I don't think I can EVER ask her that.
"So your powers are unique to you?"
"Yes. As far as I know no one else on Themyscira is as strong as I am, or capable of independent flight. No one else had senses as keen as mine either. They used to say my hearing was better than that of a wolf, my sight better than that of an eagle, and my sense of smell sharper than that of a Themysciran Hunting Hound. But whether my abilities are merely an amplification of my Amazonian physiology by my Olympian heritage or a manifestation of Olympian abilities all by themselves I do not know. It is all magic based, that is the only thing I am sure of. Anyway, this evening is not about me. Please continue with your story. I am interested in learning how you received your accolades. Back home there is no such thing as a medal for valor in combat. Every Amazon is expected to give her all and then some."
"Right. So I enlisted at 18. Or rather I tried to. I had to go back and get a college degree. No one tells you these things, y'know? This was way before . General Dunford skimmed over that embarrassing detail in his little Oval Office speech as well. The man should have been a politician, I don't know why he joined the military. Anyway, I came back a few years later with a degree and got accepted into the Air Force Academy. I won't bore you with the intricate details of my training, and honestly speaking some of it is classified, but I did graduate after 4 years and finally got to be a pilot. I'll just say that our training isn't quite like yours. There is just as much academic work involved as there is physical and tactical. War has changed a lot since your times, and in some ways it hasn't changed at all. It's still brutal and costly, and peace is always preferable to a period of conflict. The objectives are more or less the same, only the politics and methods change,and even then it's not so different."
He paused to sip from his bottle, and finding it empty, poured himself a mug of beer from Diana's pitcher, which was now half empty.
"You uh, you feeling all right?" He motioned at the pitcher.
"Oh, that is more for the taste than anything else. Although I am regretting it now. No offense, but compared to what we drink back home, American beer tastes like pig's urine. Anyway, your alcohol is like water to me. You should try Bana-Mighdallian mead, brewed by another tribe on Themyscira. It could floor an elephant."
"Our beer tastes like pig's urine compared to yours? Mead that could floor an elephant? All of that sounds a tad exaggerated."
"I shall bring you a bottle of each one day and then we shall see if I am exaggerating."
"You should try absinthe. It's 70 proof."
"Yes. I got a mild buzz from that, but it was not worth it. It tasted foul. The chemical tang is just too sharp. It hurt my tongue and nose."
"Do I even want to know how you got access to absinthe?"
"No, you do not. Go on with your story."
"All right...where was I? Oh yeah, so what really is different is the style of warfare, and the rules of engagement. Modern warfare is so much more complicated. You can't just field 1,000 men against 1,000 enemies in an all out melee battle. It's not as simple as being a good fighter either. There are rules about what we can and cannot do,even in a time of war, despite the fact that the very nature of our work revolves heavily around violence and bloodshed. We are expected to lead, plan, prepare, execute and coordinate complex missions. We're expected to give and receive orders in the field, and we have to adapt to the mission as it changes. Believe me, no mission I ever took part in went according to plan. Pretty much everyone is as competent as you are if not better, and those are just the conventional forces. Special Operators, men like the Admiral and the Commandant, need a whole other level of skill and intelligence,not to mention a very high level of motivation, mental and physical conditioning to perform optimally on such a playing field. I'm not doing this to talk myself up by the way. You need to know all that so you can understand why people get medals for doing what may seem commonplace to you."
"I did not realize the work load was so great. I often wondered why I did not see younger soldiers. But it still does not beat my training. On Themyscira I began training from the age of seven. But I hated the academic classes more than anything." she said as she polished off the last of the onion rings and started on the chilli cheese fries.
"Like the Spartans eh?"
"Please. The Spartans wish they were as tough as the Amazons. And the Spartans never had to sit in a classroom for 10 hours everyday for more than 10 years."
"You sat in class for 10 hours? How did you make time for everything else?"
"The days are much longer on Themyscira, almost 30 hours long in the summer. And who said nightfall meant an end to training? I am sure that was not the case for you."
"No, it wasn't. But 30 hours? Wow. Your body clock must have been wrecked when you came here."
"Yes. Honestly speaking I have never fully adjusted to this time zone."
"So what did you study that you hated so much?"
"What you would call Classics. Mostly ancient texts from scribes of old. Tacitus, Ovid, Homer, Plato, Aristotle, and many more that mankind does not even know exists. I studied everything from the Epic of Gilgamesh to the Iliad. Some things were more recent, by our standards at least."
"Like what?"
"The writings of Niccolo Machiavelli,Leonardo Da Vinci, Confucius, Aesop, Sun Tzu."
Steve laughed.
"What?"
"It's just... you consider Sun Tzu and Machiavelli as recent.. It's an interesting perspective, that's all. Anyway, it doesn't sound that bad."
"I said recent by our standards. And that was just what the 'conventional', if you will, Amazons had studied. As a royal I was expected to know all that and much more. Almost everything really. I studied a lot of world history, mathematics,astronomy,philosophy and sciences. I studied some very basic magic, but I was hopeless at it. I am not as clueless as you might think. It is just that many of your modern terminologies escape me. But I am learning. Anyway, the focus is supposed to be on you Steve."
"This is a date, not a confession. I can't be doing all the talking."
"Fair enough."
"All those writers you named, they were men. I thought Amazons, y'know..."
"Hated men? Yes and no. We take what is useful to us and discard the rest. Literature, medical texts,architectural designs,even cooking recipes. Besides, not all of us are so rigid in our mindsets."
"Good to know. What else did you study?"
"Academic or otherwise?"
"Everything."
"Let's see... Politics, etiquette and diplomacy at the knee of my mother. Martial arts under General Phillipus. Pottery, painting and sculpting from various artisans, although I was quite bad at those, even worse than with magic, and that is really saying something. Art is definitely not my thing. Smelting and weapon forgery from the blacksmiths. Horse-riding,hunting, tracking, land navigation, survival and foraging with the Scouts. Fishing, celestial navigation and swimming with the Beach Guard."
"I must admit, all that put together sounds a lot harder than anything I ever did at the Academy. I was only there for 4 years. It's interesting that the higher the station the more you're expected to know. I don't think any royals around here were learning how to forage for food in the woods at seven years old."
"Yes, but it is a different world out here. Themyscira is a lot like Israel. We must be self sufficient and ready for battle at all times. That necessitates a grueling-some might even say brutal-regimen for all Amazons. Moreso for our leaders. And I found that learning all these trades gave me a greater appreciation for my sisters."
Steve nodded thoughtfully.
"And when you say martial arts, do you mean..."
"No, not that kind. Not for me anyway. There are Amazon scouts that have ventured outside of Themyscira and brought back scrolls on various other fighting styles, some of which are practiced and taught in the military. Jiu Jitsu, Eskrima and Capoeira are quite popular. I however, learned battle tactics and strategy. I studied the lives, philosophies and methods of all the legendary Generals and warriors of old. I learned how to fight with all edged and blunt weapons. I learned how to use spears. I learned archery. For unarmed combat I stuck to the traditional Greco-Roman Pankration. A combination of wrestling and boxing. It was the most effective fighting style for my abilities."
"I imagine there were a lot of broken bones over the years. That's why you got mad and called me an asshole in the car, isn't it?"
"Yes. It was not easy growing up different on Themyscira. I could never tell if they were being nice to me out of fear of my father, a sense of servitude to my mother or a feeling of genuine kinship. Whenever I hurt someone or broke something I felt horribly guilty about it."
"Doesn't Themyscira loosely translate to 'Paradise Island'?"
Diana smiled sadly.
"It is a paradise in the sense that it is free of all artifice. Not a paradise in the sense of a utopia."
"From what you described it seems it wasn't devoid even of that."
"Amazons, for all their wisdom, knowledge and power, are still humans-very old humans-but humans all the same. As they say, to err is human. I would expect even a utopia to have its imperfections, if it was conceived by the minds of humans."
There was silence for a few moments as Diana finished off the rest of her chilli cheese fries. When she looked up Steve was staring at her mystified.
"What is it? Is there something on my face?"
"I feel like I use this word too much with you, but wow."
"Pardon?"
"You have a good head on your shoulders. A lot smarter, more mature and objective than most people double your age. You'll make an excellent leader someday Diana."
"Thank you Steve." she said, her face coloring as she took a sip from her mug.
Just then Patricia came back to clear their plates.
"I expect you'll need a doggy bag..." She trailed off mid-sentence as her eyes fell on Diana's large, empty plate and the empty beer pitcher. Without taking her eyes off of the plate, she called over her shoulder. "Hey Darnell!"
"Yeah!" Came a shout from the kitchen.
"Get the trucker hat!"
There was a loud crash, then a wiry dark skinned man with a hairnet over his massive afro emerged from the kitchen.
"I know you didn't say what I think you just said."
"You heard me. Get the hat."
The cook disapearred back into the depths of the kitchen, where there was a series of clattering sounds.
Diana noticed a hush had fallen over the room, and all eyes were on their booth. The cook returned with an ancient looking box. He opened it, to reveal a tightly wrapped package that he proceeded to peel back tenderly. Inside was a cap, which he passed to the waitress. It was white, with a blue brim and see through netting at the back. The waitress presented it to Diana with an air of reverence.
"Ma'am, in the 30 years this place has been open, no one has ever completed the Eggscellent challenge."
Diana read the words on the hat out loud.
"'I'm Eggscellent'. Ha-ha. I get it."
"Put it on." Steve said. She obliged.
"Say cheese." The cook said. Diana barely had time to smile before the blinding flash.
"This is so going up on the Wall of Fame." He said as he went back into the kitchen.
There was a slow clap. It built up slowly until everyone in the room was clapping,cheering and whistling loudly.
"Eggscellent! Eggscellent! Eggscellent!" They chanted.
Diana found herself being hoisted up onto the shoulders of two burly men and carried around the room. It was certainly in the top ten of the most bizarre moments in her life. She laughed joyfully.
"All right! All right! We don't want her throwing up all over the place boys! Put her down! Easy now!" Said the waitress.
Steve rose, reaching for his wallet. The waitress stilled him.
"Don't bother Trevor. This one's on the house. As far as I'm concerned you two can eat and drink here at no charge for as long as you live."
"Thanks Patricia." Steve said. He turned to Diana. "I guess we should leave now. It's getting late, and nothing good ever comes from these guys getting excited at this hour."
As they walked out of the bar, the waitress grasped Steve firmly by the arm.
"You hold onto her as long as you can Trevor. I mean it." her eyes were locked on his. He merely nodded, and she released him.
"Are you ok to ride?" Diana asked when he joined her outside.
"Yeah. I'm solid. You need a ride or will you be using... alternative transport methods?"
"I'm fine. Thanks for offering."
"Ok. That was pretty surreal."
"Yes. It certainly was. I had a very good time. And the food was certainly delicious."
"I'm glad to hear it. Sorry I didn't get around to telling you the story. Yours was just so much more interesting."
"It is all right. There is always next time."
"So there will be a next time?"
"If that is what you wish."
"I'd like that very much."
Diana stepped forward and kissed him lightly on the lips.
"Goodnight Steve." She said as she floated into the air.
"Goodnight Diana." He said. He felt like he was right up there with her. She flew off into the night sky.
After about 5 minutes of flying she heard Steve whooping faintly from somewhere below.
"I'm the luckiest man aliiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiive!" he shouted as the bike engine roared and the tires screeched, the bike tearing down the street.
Diana laughed again.
Silly man, she thought to herself.
A/N: Skilgannon, glad you like my characterization. My biggest fear is getting someone totally wrong, for all my bravado about not caring what people think of my characters.
Ironically, I got sucked into Fanfiction mainly because I was so disappointed with how they portrayed many characters in the new crop of DC animated films and comic books. Fanfiction changed all that and introduced me to the possibility of moulding these characters and universes as I'd like them to be,instead of being stuck with how they are being or have been characterized. Flash and Cyborg are the only characters they got right IMO. The rest are horrible.
Green Lantern for example. Sure, a hotshot test pilot is expected to be cocky, but I feel he is portrayed too often as this 'dudebro' character,like a college fratboy with a power ring. Yes, he's a flirt and a thrill seeker, but he was also an Air Force fighter pilot. You have to be pretty intelligent,disciplined and level headed to be entrusted with flying a jet that costs millions of dollars. If he was an immature idiot, would the Guardians really leave someone so unstable with The Most Powerful Weapon In The Universe? Just because he has awesome willpower? Nope. There are billions of humans, millions with insane willpower,hundreds of thousands with the same skill set as Hal Jordan.
The "This Is Bigger Than Us" speech Bruce gave Lantern was extremely Out Of Character. IMO Bruce wouldn't preach his life story to a complete stranger, hero or not,identity known or not, just to make a point. Not even if the world itself was coming to an end. I don't think he'd admit he's only human so easily either,(again) especially not to a stranger,just so he can prove his superiority by distracting him and taking his ring. A hallmark of Batman I've always liked is the mystery surrounding him. People doubt his very existence, and those that don't can only speculate on what he is or does. And while the ring theft was cool, it was dick swinging. That's a Beta Male move. To me, Batman is far too self-assured to do that.
Shazam is even worse. I feel like the writers are so scared of upstaging Superman's place as the 'Big Gun' that they made him too childish to properly wield his abilities other than carelessly shooting bright sparks of lightning.
While he is a kid in a man's body, I've always felt Shazam has the innocence of a child, not the mentality of one. And Billy Batson doesn't have to be a saint, but a truant,thief and brat? Again, would an ancient and infinitely wise being entrust such a person with such great power?
Clark and Diana became Jock and Cheerleader. In my mind Superman possesses a quiet confidence, but new Superman is Zod-like in his pigheadedness. And Diana is usually brash, yes, but new Diana is spoiled and immature. The whole sword waving and shouting about stuff like a 6 year old who just realized she's cute is very OOC too. Apparently she just 'connected' with Superman because he effortlessly blasted Parademons. Cheerleader sees Quarterback score a touchdown and suddenly they are soul mates. I know they're targeting a younger audience, but my god, no one is that stupid. "It's nice to meet some people that get me." *intense gaze* then "I've *never* met anyone like you Superman." NO. It's all in the build up people, of which there was none. Then by the start of the next film they're dating, because Loneliness=Compatibility. Once again, no build up, just SMASH. It felt like Superman took advantage of how vulnerable she was feeling at the time, which is creepy AF. Do you see the common douche bag theme here with all the males?
Finally the worst, Arthur Curry in Throne of Atlantis. At the start he's just a depressed drunk,then he suddenly gains the necessary skills and confidence to become a king-literally within a few hours-because Destiny, and his mother was killed before he got to know her. At the start he's a messy brawler, but overnight he is transformed into an expert spear-man and unarmed combatant with skill far exceeding that of Orm and the Atlantean soldiers, who have had a lifetime of training and experience. Are we supposed to believe 'its in the blood'? Or that its willpower? Also, how is it that he absolutely flattens his brother-who should be stronger/more powerful by virtue of being FULLY Atlantean AND having royal blood-but struggles with a few normal humans? Being drunk isn't enough to explain it,neither is the 'he killed mommy and I must save the world(1 city in America)' factor. And his 'relationship' with Mera? They must have spoken for a grand total of 10 minutes the entire duration of the film, then at the end,BOOM they kiss and they're in love, together forever they rule Atlantis.
I mean WTF? Is DC staffed by 12 year old boys? I understand they have to squeeze in months of writing into little more than an hour, but even without those glaring inconsistencies, they can do much better. How hard is it to give the illusion of time passing? Or of a relationship developing? The older DCAU films did that quite well I think, but then again, they were fairly longer. Oh well.
I could literally fill a page with criticism, I damn near have, so I'll just stop there.
As always,
Read and Review.