Chapter 58: The Ministry's Biannual Security Check

The next weeks went by and the first Quidditch game of the year approached fast. Luckily the weather held true, and the sun shone brightly that November day and so the friends now sat on the Gryffindor stands eagerly watching the ongoing match. Luna in a show of support for their team decided to wear a hat in the form of a lion's head.

Currently, it stood at 90:70 for Slytherin, but that didn't perturb them as they all knew that a game can change very suddenly, so it wasn't as if Gryffindor was losing.

That was when Harry came flying over to them. It was fortunate that they sat in the front row seats right behind the railing so that Harry could hover beneath them and not hindering the view of anyone.

"Hey, enjoying the game?" Harry asked Jor, who was sitting in his father's lap and excitedly bouncing up and down.

"It is great, so much fun!" the boy piped but didn't take his gaze from the happenings over him.

Just at that moment, Gryffindor scored, and Jor jumped up, cheering loudly. The others though weren't any better and also shouted and cheered. Harry couldn't help himself, he laughed. It was nice to see that Jor began to enjoy life now that he was reunited with his father.

"Say, aren't you supposed to find and catch the snitch?" Loki asked amusedly.

"Hey, I know where the snitch is at every time," Harry retorted indignantly. "At the moment it is hovering right next to the left Slytherin hoop."

"Thank you, Potter," suddenly a voice from above them said amusedly, and they all watched how Draco sped away in the direction Harry had pointed out.

Harry laughed, winked at Jor and followed his cousin at high-speed. It took him a few seconds, but in the end, he managed to catch up with him, even with Draco flying the faster broom.

"You knew that I was there and did that on purpose, didn't you?" Draco shouted over to him.

"I wanted to spice things up a bit, well and I wanted to see who of us the better flyer is," Harry shouted back.

Draco just shook his head and leaned forward to gain more speed. Harry followed that example, diving when the snitch suddenly changed direction. They both flew through the narrow trench that surrounded the pitch, having to dodge wooden beams that supported the entire construction.

Both flew out of the trench and back into the open field. They were closing in on the snitch, and at that moment it was unclear who would catch it as they were dead even. Draco grabbed for the snitch at the same time as Harry did, when suddenly a Bludger appeared out of nowhere and hit Draco's broom.

Thanks to the impact, Draco was thrown off his broom, fell about two metres before he collided with the ground, rolling quite a distance where he then came to a rest. Harry instantly turned around while putting the snitch he had caught at one wing in his pocket.

He swiftly landed right next to Draco, threw his broom to the side and knelt down right next to the moaning boy. With a few flicks of his hand, he knew what was wrong and had to suppress a gasp. Once he knew what was wrong with his friend, he went to work, healing the more severe injuries like the broken ribs first. Harry was just treating the broken arm when finally Snape, Pomfrey and a few other teachers arrived.

"He had several broken ribs, which I already healed, his forearm is also broken, sprained ankle and several bruises all over his body," Harry quickly summarised, not stopping his healing of the broken arm.

Severus just nodded, began to dig into his potions bag that he was always carrying around and pulled out several potions he gave Draco.

Pomfrey in the meantime cast several charms of her own to see whether Harry missed anything. It wasn't that she didn't trust him, she was just thorough and needed the scan for her files.

That was when suddenly another person spoke up.

"A broken arm? I can fix that in a jiffy," Lockhart said in an arrogant tone while squeezing himself through the crowd that formed around them.

"Touch him, and I promise you my retribution will be swift," Harry growled without as much as looking up.

Lockhart blinked a few times but puffed up indignantly.

"I can understand that a boy like you is protective of his friend, but you have to see that I have much more experience with situations like this. It was in 'Travels with Trolls' where I had to heal a fellow traveller who had a close meeting with one of the trolls. It wasn't a nice sight I can tell you," the man recollected. "So, you see why I'm more qualified to heal the poor boy than you are."

"Are you also more qualified than I am?" Pomfrey hissed. "Because I trust Mr Potter with the healing of Mr Malfoy, however, I don't trust you to do as much as removing a splinter, not to mention healing broken bones."

Lockhart bristled at that but relented, deciding that it would be a good idea instead to keep the mob away. Harry wondered whether he used up his remaining brain cells to come up with that idea, but he was glad nonetheless.

A few minutes and the administration of several potions later, Snape conjured a stretcher and carefully levitated Draco onto it. Afterwards, he levitated the stretcher and walked briskly towards the exit of the stadium closely followed by Pomfrey.

Harry also stood up and turned towards Madame Hooch.

"By the way, here's the snitch," he said while throwing her the ball.

"So Gryffindor wins," she exclaimed.

"Yes, no," Harry told her with a crooked grin. "Actually, Slytherin wins. We caught the ball simultaneously before the Bludger hit Draco's broom. I only didn't let go of it and pocketed it. And no matter whether you give us both the full 150 points or divide them up, Slytherin would still win since they scored more goals."

Everyone that stood around him, which were the professors as well as both Quidditch teams, looked at him incredulously. Some of the Gryffindor team seemed shocked that Harry just handed the victory to Slytherin, while the Slytherins were surprised that Harry didn't just claim that he caught the snitch alone.

That was when the twins walked up to him, and each threw an arm over his shoulder, sandwiching him.

"Fair is fair," the first twin said.

"But you'll have to bake us all a cake for losing against that blond ponce," the second one ended, but it was without any bite to it, being friends with Draco themselves.

"As if I wouldn't have baked one anyway," Harry replied with a laugh.

"Good boy," the left twin said while patting his head.

"Is Draco going to be alright?" Hermione asked worriedly, finally having joined them together with the others.

"Yes, I think Madame Pomfrey just wants to make sure that everything is healing properly and keeping him in her ward to observe him because of a concussion," Harry summarised.

They all looked relieved that their friend would be alright and out of the hospital wing by evening or tomorrow morning the latest.

"Now that the game is over, I suggest that you get changed and back to the castle," Hooch, who came from announcing the winner, told them.

They all nodded, Flint and Wood shaking hands for a game well played before the teams left to their respective locker rooms. Half an hour later they went to the castle, where Harry split off towards the kitchen. It didn't take an hour before the entire house was in the magically enlarged common room, talking about the game and enjoying Harry's cakes.

While some were peeved that Harry gave away the victory, they could see his reasoning about fair-play and therefore kept their complaining to a minimum.

Jor on the other hand excitedly babbled away retelling the entire game multiple times though no one wanted to stop him. They were all glad that the child was happy.

By now everyone was used to the six-year-old boy, and quite a few took a liking to the feisty boy. During classes, he always sat with Loki and Harry after a long talk with Michael. At first, the teachers had thought that it would be boring for Jor to attend the classes, but it became quickly apparent that while the boy looked six-year-old, his mind was developed much further and he quickly grasped the taught material. What he didn't understand, Loki explained to him.

Besides that, Jor also was uncomfortable with letting either Harry or Loki out of his sight for long though he wasn't as clingy anymore.

Draco soon fully recovered from his Quidditch accident and time went on, classes were taught, and new spells learned.

Until Jor proclaimed that he was bored.

Had anyone foreseen what massive chaos would follow this exclamation, they would have run and fast. But as it is no one knew what that innocent and straightforward statement would trigger.

It was only two weeks until the winter holidays would begin and the friends were sitting in the Gryffindor common room in front of the fire, Draco having joined them in his disguise again. Though when Sam joked that he was becoming a Gryffindor with how often he was there, Sam learned just why Draco was a Slytherin, having been tricked into doing Draco's history homework for the week. It was Saturday afternoon now, and they all were relaxing after having done their homework in the library. By this point it was a usual sight that they would sit together, helping each other when someone had problems with a topic.

"I'm bored," Jor suddenly moaned. "It is the weekend, I want to do something fun!"

Harry, hearing that, suddenly had a contemplative look on his face while the others looked at him in trepidation. The last time Harry sported such an expression, everyone in the castle had problems getting back in their respective common rooms because all guardians suddenly asked the students to show an example of the character traits that were associated with the houses. The only ones who didn't have a problem with getting into the common room were the Ravens as they were used to showing their intelligence by solving a riddle.

So it was to be feared that whatever Harry was concocting would be huge and possibly would make their lives harder in the foreseeable future.

"I have an idea," Harry suddenly said with a bright smile, effectively ripping everyone from their musing about what he would come up with. "Luna, Hermione, I think you should grab the twins. They need a makeover."

Hermione though just looked at him in confusion, but Luna seemed to know what he was after, jumped up and dragged her over to the twins before pulling them to the boys' dorm. Everyone in the common room looked after them in confusion but shrugged it off.

It took them nearly an hour, but eventually, the four came back down. All heads snapped towards the twins, and some even whistled appreciatively.

The twins wore black leather trousers, as well as a black leather jacket with fringes over a deep red button-up shirt. On top of that came black dragon leather cowboy boots and black cowboy hats that hang on their back held by leather strings.

Harry, who in the meantime also had left to don his Lord Frilly Pink outfit and already returned, had to admit that the two girls did a beautiful job.

"Well done you two," he complimented them. "That calls for extra Christmas presents."

"Would you please tell us what you planned?" Hermione muttered.

"Ah, ah, ah, that would spoil the surprise, wouldn't it?" Harry laughed while walking over to Loki. "You'll probably learn tomorrow from the papers."

He leaned close to the pagan god and whispered something. Loki looked at him in disbelieve but after a few moments nodded with a broad smile.

"Good, Puck come here," he called out to his Demiguise, which dutifully jumped on his shoulder, draping his tail around Harry's neck and shoulder.

Once the monkey was in place, Harry held his hands out to the twins, who warily grabbed them. Without a sound, Harry vanished closely followed by Loki, who by that time had picked up his son.

The atrium of the Ministry of Magic was filled with people milling around, entering or leaving one of the chimneys connected to the Floo system, apparating in and out or just running around doing their business. A constant noise was filling the air, and so, it was no wonder that no one heard or saw the boy dressed in a dark deep pink and his companions arriving in the middle of it. Barely anyone gave them a second glance, thinking that they had just a strange sense of dressing before they returned to whatever they were doing.

Harry scowled when no one acknowledged his arriving, and so, he slammed his cane down on the floor three times. The magically enhanced sound echoed through the entire atrium, effectively stopping everyone in their tracks and making them stare at him.

"Good, now that I have your attention, hello!" Harry greeted everyone.

"What is the meaning of this?" someone shouted enraged that he was interrupted.

"Ah, good question. You see, I recently became the new Dark Lord, and I thought that it would be prudent to introduce myself," Harry replied, ignoring the fearful gasps and muttering. "I'm Lord Frilly Pink, and those two are my right and left hand, the Los Dos Bros."

"Wait, your right and left hand?" the first twin asked surprised.

"We never agreed to that," the second continued.

"So you don't want those positions? Too bad," Harry said with a shrug before he called out to the staring masses. "I'm sorry my mistake, it seems that the positions as my right and left hand are still vacant. Applications can be sent to…."

"Wait, wait," one of the twins exclaimed.

"What do these positions include?"

"And who of us fills which?"

"We'll discuss that later, but for now the plan is to have some fun," Harry told them when suddenly Madame Bones together with no less than seven Aurors came running from the elevators.

"What is this about? Who are you?" Bones called out.

"Oh, look there. Snow White and the seven dwarves," Harry said with a chuckle before slamming his cane down again and transforming the Aurors into seven dwarves and Bones into Snow White. "I'm the Dark Lord Frilly Pink, and those are the infamous Dos Bros. For why we're here, well I thought it a good idea to introduce myself, and since we're already here, I wanted to conduct the biannual security check."

"What? You think you can get far within the Ministry of Magic?" a man snorted. "How old are you? Ten? Eleven?"

"Well, technically I'm thirteen, officially…twelve…I think…. How old am I?" he asked one of the twins.

"Twelve, my Lord," one of the twins said with a flourished bow.

"Ah yes, twelve."

"As if a twelve-year-old boy could be a Dark Lord, or storm the Ministry," another man said, barking out a laugh.

Harry looked at the man because the voice was familiar when he realised that it was Sirius, who together with Remus, Lily and James were standing close to the front desk. Seeing that a Cheshire grin spread over his face.

"The infamous Marauders. I have an idea…let's see who of us is better, or do you fear you'll lose?"

With that, Harry pulled a small bag out of his pocket and handed it Puck, who took it before jumping down and vanishing in the crow that looked confused because Puck was invisible to them. In the bag was a little something that he bought in Japan and that should redecorate the Ministry quite nicely.

James though who stared at the small bag that was bobbing in the air and vanishing between the people had a suspicion of who was standing in the middle of the atrium flanked by two handsome boys. He chuckled lowly.

"I accept your challenge, may the better prankster win," he replied, ignoring the indignant shout of his name by Lily.

Harry's grin widened impossibly further before he stomped his cane on the floor again and sent his magic through the building, activating what Puck had left all around it.

It took a few moments but soon the first screams were heard, and vines came crawling out of the corridors, covering every wall with a green blanket of leaves. Grass burst out of the floor and not much later the entire atrium looked like a massive greenhouse.

Bones gave a few instructions to her dwarf Aurors to not use any harming spells, who instantly sent curses towards the three. Harry immediately ported away. One of the twins, on the other hand, erected a shield while the other sent hexes back.

Unknown to the Aurors, Harry reappeared behind them, and with a few flicks of his hand, he had banished a few potions in their system. Others he just hexed.

The hairs of one of the Aurors suddenly grew exponentially and covered him from head to toe like a cloak, pooling around him on the floor. Said Auror began to curse and tried to get to see something, but it was to no avail. In the end, he only managed to tangle himself so that he fell over with a thump.

Another Auror in the meantime was hit by one of the twins' spells and suddenly felt the urge to recite poems.

Sirius, who saw that, broke out into laughter. Looking at James they both nodded, pulled their wands and also began to throw hexes at the twins and Aurors alike. What they didn't anticipate though was that Loki, who had disillusioned himself and his son to watch the chaos, decided to participate in this chaos that had erupted. So it was quite surprising when Sirius suddenly looked like the Marchhare while James gave a performance as the Mad Hatter. Lily in the meantime found herself as Alice.

As it was, most people had fled down the corridors in the hope that they could escape the chaos in the atrium and the hexing but they quickly found out that it seemed to be even worse there. Endless masses of plants grew everywhere and also blocked entire corridors. Some tried to cut them down with hexes, but it quickly became evident that this wouldn't work, the plants grew faster than they could cut them down.

In the meantime, in the Atrium, the Unspeakables, as well as several more Aurors, arrived to help to contain the chaos and aid their colleagues. Bones quickly instructed them what to do though with the involvement of Loki they promptly went into defensive mode when suddenly small humanoid looking plant creatures came crawling out of the plants and tried to entangle them.

In between all that, James had a lot of fun to transfigure small stone people who shout out pieces of advice on how to fight that Dark Lord as well as questioning their fighting style, distracting the Aurors with it. At some point, one of the Aurors decided that enough was enough and blasted them apart.

"Where is that blasted boy?" Bones muttered, hiding behind a pillar from the oncoming barrage of spells from the twins.

Thanks to the twins, currently fireworks was continually exploding under the high ceiling, clouds of different colour were covering the floor, colouring anything and everything they came in touch with, while two of the Aurors looked like angry birds.

Though the twins also had been hit with the odd spell, resulting in Fred's tongue being numb which made pronouncing spells nearly impossible, not that it impaired him in the slightest since he practised his mind magic a lot. George, on the other hand, was bound by ropes though thanks to his legs being freed, he also had no problems of defending himself.

What none of them all knew though was that Harry long since left and now entered the completely empty Department of Mysteries. He passed several different rooms that looked highly intriguing, but for now, he had another goal in mind. So, he walked through the Department until he reached a massive hall that was filled with long rows of high shelves. In these shelves laid hundreds of thousands of small glass orbs with little notes attached to them.

Wandering through the rows, he soon learned that the orbs were sorted by the time they were created. With that in mind, he walked down the rows until he reached the row that roughly fitted the timeframe he was looking for.

Carefully looking at each label, he walked along the row until one label caught his attention.

Lord Voldemort & Harry James Potter (?)

With a victorious smirk, Harry carefully picked the orb up while covering it in an unbreakable charm before placing it in a velvet bag and then in his pocket. Done with what he had come for he teleported away and straight in the office of the Minister of Magic.

Said man was sitting in his chair, worrying about what was going on.

Harry's smirk widened when he walked through the, thankfully plant free, office towards the man.

"Hey there, I'm the Dark Lord Frilly Pink," Harry greeted him with a wave of his hand. "By the way, your security sucks."

The Minister was gaping like a fish out of water. How had that boy gotten in here? His office was supposed to be impenetrable during a lockdown, which had been erected as soon as the first spells went flying. He had no idea what was going on, just that someone attacked the Ministry and now that boy came in here and said he was a Dark Lord!? Preposterous.

He just wanted to say something when Harry spoke up again.

"You see, you have two choices now. Either you admit defeat, and I'll just leave you sitting there in all your glory and unharmed – well, except what the Prophet will print about you –, or you antagonise me and well…you'll have to face my wrath."

However, that only managed to enrage Fudge.

"You cannot come in her and demand such things from me! I'm the Minister of Magic. How old are you even? How did you get in here? This office is supposed to be impenetrable," he raged.

"Ah, what a pity," Harry replied with a sigh, waving his hands.

Though after a moment he could only stare at the place the Minister had sat at. Now there was a small, cute looking little white bunny.

Harry snickered, picked the bunny up and sat down with the rabbit in his lap. At first, the Minister tried to get away, but when he realised that it was to no avail, he just cowered down in hope to be as small as possible. Harry again waved his hand before he leaned back and made himself comfortable.

They sat there for quite some time, Harry humming lowly when suddenly the door burst open and revealed an enraged Madame Bones together with five Aurors, who undoubtedly had seen better times. One was wearing only a mini-skirt that was just long enough to cover everything inappropriate, while another one looked like Heidi.

"Welcome ladies and gentlemen. How may I be of help on this wonderful day?" Harry asked cheerfully.

"You could start with telling us what happened with the Minister," Bones snapped.

"You mean this cute little bunny here?" Harry replied while holding up said bunny. "Don't worry, you'll have your panicky little Minister back in no time. You see I saw Alice and the Mad Hatter earlier and thought that all that was missing was the White Rabbit. However, I was just here to introduce myself and see how good your security is. Well…at least you fought back, the MACUSA just broke out in utter chaos. So, you only get a Dreadful instead of a Troll. Hooray! I'll hope that you'll do better next time. See ya."

With a broad grin, he sat the bunny on the desk and just at that moment, Puck ran into the room on jumped on his shoulder as if knowing that they would leave, before Harry teleported away, leaving a not very amused head of the DMLE and a frightened bunny behind. Ah yes, and unknown to those also a large banner in the atrium.

LOKI'S APPRENTICE 1 : MoM 0 : MARAUDERS 0
Seriously have you been trying at all?

A/N: 'til next chapter!