Can't Lose You
Imagine Person A almost walks out into the street in front of a car and Person B quickly grabs and pulls back Person A before they get hit. Person B worriedly holds Person A close to them as the car passes while Person A is still in shock that they almost got hit.
S9 AU where no one dies. Meddison, Slexie, Calzona, Cristina/Teddy, Japril
A/N: This idea came out of nowhere. The chapters are going to be pretty long, but hopefully you'll all stick through me. I've made a few differences than what was stated in canon, both Grey's and the few Private Practice equivalents, but I think it'll be good. Enjoy this first chapter.
Meredith sighed softly to herself as she stepped outside the hospital doors. It had been a long, grueling day at Seattle Grace Mercy West. Two days ago, they'd been rescued from the plane crash. They'd been missing for over a week. The Seattle Five, they were called. Her, Cristina, Mark, Derek, and Arizona. The ones who survived. But they weren't without their own scars, their own silent battles.
Mark was still recovering from his injuries he sustained in the plane crash, and Lexie had been sleeping in his room every night. She still had nightmares about her sister joining her and the others on the plane. Callie was in Arizona's room every morning before she started physical therapy for her new leg. She usually had Sofia with her so the blonde could see her little girl. It always made her smile seeing Arizona light up at Sofia. She knew how much losing her leg had affected her, but she was sure that overtime, she would know that it was to save her life.
Cristina was still off work, still not mentally ready to come back to work. Teddy was taking time off as well to care for her, something that she was sure bugged Owen to no end. She wasn't quite sure what was going on between Teddy and Cristina, but she knew that her best friend would tell her when the time was right.
Derek was in physical therapy for his hand. Since the crash, maybe even before that, he'd been distant. She wished she could figure him out. One minute he was happy, the next, he was angry. He was still adamant about going to Boston, but she knew it wasn't the right move, even if she'd initially been all for it. And that led to more fighting. She wasn't even sure if he would come home tonight. Amelia had Zola for the night, which means just maybe she could get something to drink before she went home.
She, like Cristina, was lucky. No internal injuries, no amputations, no life-altering surgeries. But the mental scars were there. Listening to Arizona scream and moan in pain, staying awake to keep the wolves away, listening to Jerry, their pilot, coughing up blood and eventually dying, while they were unable to do anything. Listening to Mark and Derek try to keep each other awake. It was so much, too much. Cristina had Teddy. Teddy was there for her. She didn't have anyone. Derek was worried about his hand, his career, and it wasn't like she could talk to Amelia, not about this. And she couldn't talk to Zola about it. She was alone, her mind its own warzone.
As lost in her thoughts as she was, she didn't see the car as it came speeding towards her.
Addison was still laughing quietly to herself as she stepped into the cold night air of Seattle at something Mark had said. The news of the plane crash sent her running back to check on her friends. Callie's wife Arizona had lost a leg to the crash, having to be amputated to save her life; Mark was healing from internal bleeding; Derek had damaged his hand trying to free himself from debris. Cristina was still off work, according to Callie, and Teddy Altman was staying with her. The rumor mill was that Cristina was a mute now, traumatized, and unable to fly again, though she had no idea if those rumors were true. But until she spoke to Cristina herself, she wouldn't speculate. And Meredith…
She paused. Honestly, she hadn't seen the former-dirty mistress today. She had been expecting to, even if only in passing. When she'd asked Derek, he'd fired off some excuse about her being in surgery. She'd barely managed to avoid rolling her eyes. Typical Derek. He was concerned about his hand, whether he could return to surgery, his career, his life, and hadn't even bothered to see how his girlfriend (wife?) was doing after this traumatic event. Besides, there was no way Meredith was cleared for surgery yet. As far as she knew, yesterday was the day everyone had been able to be moved from Boise Memorial, stable enough to be moved, yet sedated to be flown safely. There wasn't a part of her that objected to the sedation.
She'd left Mark's room, Lexie sleeping on the cot by his bed, his voice ringing in her ears.
"Maybe you can get yourself a Grey too. We can compare notes."
Maybe. She rolled her eyes. Meredith Grey was with her ex-husband. Addison was a lot of things, but she wasn't going to destroy their relationship the way she'd ruined hers and Derek's.
The air hit her face, and she realized that Meredith was only a few steps in front of her, lost in thought.
"Meredith." She called in greeting.
The blonde didn't seem to hear her, just continued to walk. She cocked her head to the side, confused.
"Meredith?" She called again. And again, there was no response.
She saw the lights of the car, speeding in the lot. Heading right towards the woman. She saw Meredith start to step onto the asphalt and couldn't explain the sudden way her heart stopped.
"Meredith!" Her feet moved as she shouted the blonde's name, panicked.
She wrapped her arms around the blonde Attending, pulling her back seconds before the car zoomed past and kept going.
Meredith blinked as she was yanked back suddenly, the car zooming past her as she and the mystery person land hard on the ground. The fog surrounding her thoughts suddenly dissipated, the person's voice floating into her ears.
"...okay? What the hell were you even thinking? Christ, Meredith, you were rescued from a plane crash two days ago, for God's sake! Are you even listening to me?"
She looked up into the face of Addison Montgomery. Her face was slightly red from the cold. Her hair was slightly longer than the last time they'd seen one another, coming to rest just above her collarbone, her eyes still just as sharp. She was just as beautiful as ever. Wait, what?
She realized the redhead was still talking.
"...head CT."
"I'm fine," She replied automatically, attempting to detangle themselves from the mess she'd caused by her scatterbrained thoughts, "Just zoned out."
Addison's eyes roamed over her face again, and she felt her body heat up in a way it shouldn't have, not out in this cold. She felt completely out of touch with herself. Addison reached out her hand to help her up, and she felt the electric shock shoot through her body. What was wrong with her?
"Let's get you checked out real quick," Addison said, gently pulling her towards the hospital doors.
"I'm fine," She insisted. When the redhead ignored her, she huffed, "Dr. Montgomery."
Worried blue eyes captured hers, and whatever else she was going to say fled her brain in a rush.
"Don't Dr. Montgomery me, Meredith."
Addison wasn't even sure what had come over her. Meredith Grey wasn't her responsibly. Her heart was still racing from adrenaline. Had she not gotten there in time, Meredith would be in surgery right now, or possibly even dead. She hated the dread she felt at the thought. She hated what that meant.
"Richard should still be here," She started.
"No," Meredith interjected, "He'll think something is wrong."
Something is wrong, she wanted to say, but she held her tongue.
"Who do you want then?"
"You're so insistent about it, you do it."
Normally, she would argue. It was late, but her flight wasn't until evening tomorrow, so it wasn't like she needed to be up early. She was just relieved that Meredith was allowing the exam. She walked with the woman to an empty exam room. Just one quick exam and then she would be able to sleep tonight. She nudged the blonde into the room, unaware of the pair of eyes watching them.
Derek Shepherd was not a stupid man. Arrogant at times, yes, egocentric maybe. But stupid? Oh no. So, when he saw his ex-wife leading his current wife into an exam room, he knew exactly what was going on. Really, he couldn't believe he hadn't seen it before. He'd been right all those years ago. She really was just a cheating whore. Why didn't he see it before? Or maybe he had just ignored it. He fixed his coat, heading towards the door.
Meredith blinked as Addison waved the penlight in front of her eyes.
"Addison," Her voice held an edge of a whine to it, "come on, I'm fine."
"Stop saying that word," Addison's voice was a near growl as she waved the pen again, "You didn't see a car that was speeding towards you."
"I got lost in my thoughts. My eyesight is," She bit her lip as she started to say fine, "my eyesight is okay."
The corners of Addison's mouth went up slightly. Addison put away the penlight and moved to check her vitals. As Addison moved to grab her stethoscope, the door was pushed open loudly. Despite herself, she jumped. And then she felt childish for doing so. It was just a door. But as soon as she made eye contact with Derek, she felt a sudden sense of unease. He was angry. No, he was livid. Over what, she didn't know, but she'd only ever seen this anger a few times. When he'd flung her engagement ring into the woods. When she'd messed with his clinical trial. When he was so mad that she worried that maybe he would hit her.
She didn't realize she'd grabbed Addison's hand until she felt the pad of her thumb running gentle circles along the back of hers.
"What the hell is going on in here?" Derek's voice was nothing more than a bark, an order.
She opened her mouth to answer, but no sound came out.
Derek's anger and Meredith's reaction to it had Addison's patience extremely thin. She didn't have time for his games, not tonight, not right now.
"How's your hand?" She questions in lieu of answer to his question.
"What. Is. Going. On?" Derek repeated.
She met his gaze coldly, "A car tried to run your girlfriend over. I pulled her out of the way. She was spaced out."
"I'm fine," She heard Meredith grumble under her breath.
"And you had to do the exam? You should've paged me!"
"Lower your voice," She hissed. Briefly, she wondered why Meredith hadn't asked for Derek, or even paged him herself. Though seeing his reaction now, she could understand why. He hadn't even asked if she was okay.
Meredith sighed and moved to stand, "Thanks, Addison, but I'm okay, really."
As she stood, she stumbled just slightly. Instinctively, she reached out to steady her. Like hell she was fine, she thought to herself. For the second time, their eyes met. She felt her heartbeat quicken.
"Are you sure?" She wasn't completely convinced. Even with the exam interrupted, she still noticed things. Meredith's unfocused gaze, her quickened pulse. It was worrisome.
Meredith smiled softly, "I'm sure."
Derek's voice broke the moment, "There, you see? Now, let's go home Meredith."
"I'll still be here tomorrow, Meredith," She said as Meredith moved to the door, to Derek, "No one likes to be a patient, but I'd like you to check in with me please."
"Sure thing," Meredith agreed as Derek practically pulled her out the door.
She didn't miss the glare he sent her way either. Not wanting to follow the couple out, she made her way back up to Mark's room. For a few minutes, she watched him sleep, the way his hand held Lexie's as Little Grey slept in the cot beside him. She wanted that. That security. That love and devotion.
Maybe you should get yourself a Grey too. Mark had said jokingly. She thought back to Meredith's hand in hers, the unease she felt at Derek's yelling, the way Meredith had shrunk slightly in response. Derek Shepherd didn't deserve Meredith Grey. The sad thing was, she knew she didn't either.
Meredith wretched her arm out of Derek's grasp the moment she could, unconsciously rubbing the throbbing area. There was no reason for him to grab her so hard. Besides, she could walk.
"Let's go to Joe's," Derek said, reaching for her again.
She dodged his hand, "I'm tired, Derek. I want to go home."
He tried again, reaching out towards her, and she barely stopped herself from flinching as his hand cupped her cheek. God, what was wrong with her? She loved him. She knew he wouldn't hurt her.
He sighed softly as he took her hand, gentler this time, and together they walked to the car. She started towards the driver's side when his voice stopped her.
"What are you doing?"
She looked at him in the semi-lit lot, tilting her head in confusion, "Driving home?"
He shook his head, "I'm alright to drive."
She looked from him to his still-bandaged hand and commented dryly, "You have one hand."
"I'm good to drive."
"We're not fighting over this, Derek," She replied adamantly, "I drove us in, I can drive us home."
The calm demeanor changed in an instant, his eyes stormy with anger, "I said it's fine, Meredith."
"Derek," She started with a weary sigh.
He crossed the distance between them in an instant, snatching the car keys from her. She felt her heart leap into her throat, felt her body start to tremble in anger and the tiniest hint of fear. She didn't do fear. She was Meredith Grey, damn it.
"Get in the car, Meredith." He breathed the words so quietly that she almost missed them.
She stepped away from him, her mind made up, "Fine, take the car, Derek, but I'm not going home with you. I'll call a cab."
"Meredith," Frustration edged into his voice, but she ignored it, walking back towards the hospital.
She didn't bother looking back, hearing him curse and the slam of the car door, the rev of the engine. It wasn't until she was almost to the door that she saw Addison walking towards the exit. Curious blue eyes found hers, and all thoughts of Derek were forgotten.
Addison was confused seeing Meredith walking towards the hospital entrance, even more confused not seeing Derek with her. It had only been about ten minutes, but she was sure the two would've been gone by now.
"Where's Derek?" She asked as she watched the Attending enter the hospital.
Meredith rolled her eyes, not at her, but at whatever Derek had done, "The Neuro-God decided he was fit to drive."
She sympathized with Meredith. Sometimes, Derek was single-minded.
"Would you like a ride home? No offense, Meredith, but you look like you could fall over any second."
It was almost cute the way Meredith's nose scrunched up at the accusation, "I was going to call a cab."
"I can charge you," She joked and was rewarded with a half-smile from the blonde, "It's up to you, Meredith, but I would feel better knowing that you got home safe."
"I almost don't want to go home. Zola is with Amelia tonight, and I know that he'll just want to start another fight."
She knew that well. Another fight, another accusation. Another night of him sleeping anywhere but next to her.
"Come home with me then," She blurted the words without thinking, and then immediately regrets it. They weren't friends, not really, they were barely colleagues. She was the adulterous ex-wife, and Meredith was the wronged other woman, the ex-dirty mistress. In what world could they ever be friends?
Meredith blinked up at her, startled at the offer, "What?"
Okay, she could fix this. Just redact the offer. Except, when she opened her mouth, redaction was the last thing on her mind, "My hotel is downtown. We can get take-out and complain about Derek. And that way I can keep an eye on you."
"Chinese?" Meredith asked skeptically, and she smiled. Derek hated Chinese food.
"All the Chinese you want."
Meredith's smile was a welcomed relief from the hell she'd stepped into. And for the first time since coming back from L.A. into the shitstorm that was the plane-crash, she had faith that everything would turn out alright.
The numbers on the clock read close to midnight when Derek picked up his phone and dialed Meredith. She still wasn't home, and it was both worrisome and infuriating. He didn't build this house for her to sleep in it alone.
You've reached Doctor Meredith Grey. I can't come to the phone right now, but leave a message and…
He growled low in this throat as he hung up, not even bothering to leave a message. As of late, she was grating on his nerves. They were both in the plane crash, and she was probably the only one who came out the most unscathed. She didn't have to worry about her surgical career possibly ending. She didn't have to worry about her best friend taking a nosedive in the middle of the night. Hell, even Cristina was lucky, even if she'd suddenly gone mute from the trauma. But Meredith was fine. That's what she said, so what right did he have to disagree with her? She knew herself better than he did after all. He wished she would focus on him for once; he was struggling, and she was fine.
He glanced over at the clock again, watching the numbers change over to 12:30. He suddenly felt angry. She said she would be home, and she lied. As he turned over to sleep, he thought of just where his wife was. If she wasn't going to be home, she shouldn't have lied to him that she would be.
Addison was jostled awake by flailing limbs, Meredith's quiet pleading reaching her ears. She reached out for the woman, trying to coax her awake.
"Meredith," She whispered softly.
The blonde jolted awake, reaching forward and clinging onto the front of her shirt on instinct, physically shaking and crying. Her heart ached for the woman. Hesitantly, she wrapped her arms around Meredith's back, reassuring her softly. And if Meredith buried her face into her shirt again, she wouldn't tell anyone. She wasn't sure how long it was before Meredith stopped crying, but she didn't look at the time. She didn't care.
This was what she had been worried about; no matter everyone thought, Meredith wasn't as fine as she liked everyone to believe.
"I keep dreaming," Meredith began quietly, "that Lexie was on the plane with us. That she died out there."
"She wasn't. She didn't." She answered as she drew circles on Meredith's back in an attempt to calm her.
"It felt so real," In the quiet of the night, she felt Meredith's haunted eyes on her.
She just wanted to take the pain away.
"It wasn't," She reassured her. She could feel the change in the air, and it scared her.
Their breath mingled together for long moments. She'd never felt such a pull before. She wanted to close the distance between them, wanted to take all of Meredith's fears away.
When they'd gotten ready for bed, she had no problems sleeping beside the woman. It was platonic. Friends did this. And they were sort-of friends. They stayed up late and talked about cases and L.A., and anything but Derek. She'd long ago started to see Meredith as more than the woman who stole her husband. She was a talented surgeon, someone who was just as broken as she was, just as strong as she was.
"Addison," Meredith's voice was soft, and she was reminded of the blonde being high on morphine.
I know you hate me and all. Meredith leaned up, their lips a breath away, and she felt her body heat up. She could never hate Meredith. She ran to L.A. to hide the fact that she was falling in love with the intern her husband had left her for. When she came back the first time, when Meredith had been a resident, she should've told her. Instead, she tried to push them back together and left again. Because she was tainted. She didn't deserve her. And then again, coming back for Archer and Callie, but by then, it'd been too late. She was always too late.
"Meredith," She replied just as softly.
I don't hate you.
Meredith closed the distance between them, but Addison didn't stop her, didn't push her away. Salty tears were still on her lips, but Addison didn't seem to care as she deepened the kiss. She would do anything to push the nightmare from her mind.
She should stop, she knew it. Reluctantly, she felt Addison pull away, and she moaned in disappointment. Addison's shuddering upon hearing the sound nearly made up for it. She needed more, damn it. She moves from the redhead's mouth to her neck, pressing open kisses to the soft skin, smirking victoriously as Addison moaned. That was a win for her.
"Meredith," Addison hissed softly, "Meredith, we can't."
She couldn't help but notice Addison wasn't pushing her away. In fact, Addison's hands continued to run along her back gently, in a calming manner. She could feel Addison's pulse beating beneath her tongue. She pulled away slowly, breathing hard. She'd never felt this before. Desire pulsed through her, heady and encompassing. Not even with Derek. She froze.
"Oh God," The realization of just what she'd done fully sunk in.
She felt the burning shame and guilt. This was wrong. She knew it. This time, she was the adulterous whore, and Addison was Mark Sloan. Even if it was only kissing, she'd cheated on her husband with his ex-wife. The irony wasn't lost on her. He'd cheated with her on Addison, after all.
"We can stop," Addison's voice was measured, like she was trying to convince herself.
"What if I don't want to?" She'd already gone this far. She just needed something to take her mind off of the crash. Maybe, maybe this was fair. Maybe it was karma.
"Meredith, you don't want to make the same mistake I did," Addison gently stroked her cheek, and unlike with Derek, she didn't flinch away, "I don't want you to get hurt by him again."
Her body felt on fire, and all she wanted to do was cool it down.
"I don't want to talk about him tonight," She leaned forward again, capturing Addison's lips once again, "Help me forget."
She felt Addison's resolve crack as she kissed her back. Nimble fingers pulled at her clothes, stripping her quickly. She moaned as those same fingers found her wet and slick, pumping two fingers inside her, and then three.
"Meredith."
"Addison, fuck." She twisted slightly so she was sitting overtop the redhead.
"Meredith."
"Please," She hissed out. She was so close. Fuck, so close…
"Meredith." She felt the softness of a pillow hit her face, waking her instantly.
She sat up slowly, looking over at Addison, who stood in the doorway of the bathroom, wearing a soft-looking robe, her hair wet from the shower.
"Shower's free if you want to get one before work."
She fell back on the bed, staring at the ceiling. It had all been a dream. Fuck.
Addison didn't like how quiet Meredith was being on the drive to work. She suspected that it had something to do with how vulnerable she'd been last night, and she was trying to figure out a way to reassure the new Attending that everything was okay. On the other hand, she wasn't sure if Meredith was much of a morning person. What if she didn't talk much in the mornings? Maybe Meredith was quiet by nature, but that didn't mean she had to like it. She took a slow breath. She wasn't one to shy away from something like this.
"Are you alright?" She questioned gently, "You haven't spoken much."
Meredith turned to her, looking slightly startled, like she was shocked that she'd spoken at all, "I don't remember what happened last night. I had a nightmare, I think."
"About Lexie," She confirmed, "You we're thrashing in your sleep. You calmed down enough to fall back asleep." It didn't feel right to tell her about her sleep-talking or the way she'd clung to the front of her night shirt, how she'd fallen back asleep holding tight to her.
"That's all?" Meredith looked relieved at her admission, and she felt her heart plummet.
Thoughts about their near-kiss flooded her mind, but it seemed like she was the only one excited about that. She swallowed roughly, "That's all."
She just needed to get through the day and then back to L.A. tonight.
Derek stalked into the hospital, his anger rolling off of him in waves. He could maybe understand Meredith not coming home, but she hadn't even acknowledged his phone calls or texts. Amelia had called to say that she was fine keeping Zola another night. Hopefully, that meant that he and Meredith could actually talk tonight.
As he made his way into the Attendings lounge, he finally found Meredith. His haze of anger disappeared instantly, at least until he realized who she was talking to. Addison. What was she still doing here? She'd checked in on everyone already. Why couldn't she just go back to L.A. so they could all get on with their lives?
The two women had yet to acknowledge him. For some reason that made him angrier. Meredith was in the process of handing something back to Addison. When he looked closer, he saw that it was Addison's Yale hoodie.
"Why do you have that?" He questioned, pulling the two women out of their conversation. Meredith glanced at him, something akin to guilt in her eyes, and he felt his patience being tested. Had she actually cheated on him? And with Addison? Surely not.
Addison's fingers brushed against the fabric of her old hoodie. She hadn't seen it in years, not since the night Mark had borrowed it during a rainstorm. His boyish grin was still engrained in her memory, the promise that he'd give it back to her the next day. She'd given up on ever getting it back.
"Lexie found it in Mark's apartment, in a box. He said it was yours," Meredith explained.
She made a mental note to visit Mark before she left today, "It was. Mark had borrowed it in college. I never thought I'd get it back, so I bought another one."
"Oh," Meredith replied softly.
Staring at the object of her affections, she thought back to last night, to their almost kiss. That's what it was, right? She was so sure that Meredith was going to kiss her, was anticipating it. When she'd snuggled into her arms and fell asleep instead, she was disappointed. And then she was angry at herself for that disappointment. Meredith wasn't single, wasn't hers. She should've been glad.
"Keep it," She placed her hands on the worn clothing.
"Are you sure?" She hated the frown Meredith wore, wanted nothing more than to kiss it away.
Damn it, Addison, get a grip.
"Why do you have that?" Derek's voice was accusatory, and she let out a slow breath. He certainly knew how to ruin the mood. He looked between the two of them before settling his gaze on Meredith, "You never came home last night. You said you were going to take a cab."
In all the time she'd known Meredith, she never saw the woman as weak. She always spoke her mind, stood up for what she believed in. So, to see Meredith shrink back in fear twice in less than twelve hours unsettled her.
"Can we do this later?" Meredith asked, her fingers tightening on the hoodie as she reflexively pulled it into her chest.
"You're wearing the same clothes as yesterday," He hissed out, not even caring that she was standing right there.
They were friends. She decided right then and there. She and Meredith were friends. And friends didn't let each other get verbally abused by whatever Derek was. She stepped forward, her eyes simmering with anger.
"And just how did you get home last night, Derek? I'm sure Callie would love to know that you were straining your hand. It's not going to heal right if you use it."
"Piss off, Addison," He bit out, and she knew she'd struck a nerve. He turned to Meredith again, "Where the hell were you last night?"
Meredith wasn't exactly sure how they'd gotten into this situation, with Derek accusing her of God knows what and Addison defending her. She appreciated Addison more in this moment than she did last night. Flashes of her dream filtered through her consciousness. Their breath mingling together, desire pulsating through her. It hits her like a bucket of water that what she was remembering wasn't a dream. She'd been extremely close to kissing the redhead. And it seemed like Addison was completely okay with that. She'd never heard her name sound so revered.
"Where the hell were you last night?" Derek's question broke through her thoughts.
She looked at him, really looked at him. For the first time, she felt that she could truly see past the McDreamy persona he put out. She was seeing past his perfect hair and perfect smile. Past his brilliance. He was arrogant, egotistical. He was jealous, angry. And, God, so controlling. He dangled surgery over her head as a reward. She'd fallen for his looks without seeing all of him. How could she have been so stupid?
"Answer me!" He yelled, and she jumped. She felt like a little kid again, her father gone, her mother too busy with work.
I raised you to be an extraordinary human being, so imagine my disappointment when I wake up after 5 years and discover you're no more than ordinary.
"It's none of your business where I was," She replied, anger in every syllable.
"I am your husband!" He roared.
The ring burned on her finger, a reminder of another mistake she'd made. It may have gotten her Zola, but she didn't want to be married to him anymore. She took off the rings, tossing them at him.
"I want a divorce." She snarled the words, sick of it all, and in the silence that followed, she stormed past him.
He was too shocked to even stop her. That worked well enough for her. The clicking of heels on the floor as Addison followed quickly behind her reminded her that the neonatal surgeon had been in the room during that entire fight.
Derek was still in shock, and if she was honest, she was too. She almost didn't believe it happened. But the rings were on the floor in front of Derek, and Meredith was quickly storming away. She picked up her hoodie that Meredith had dropped and moved past Derek, not bothering to glance back at him. She needed to find Meredith. God, Meredith could walk fast when she wanted to.
She saw Meredith enter a stairwell, and she quickly followed.
"Meredith, wait," She called out to the fleeing woman, "please."
She was relieved when Meredith listened, stopping on the next landing. She stood beside her, waiting for her to say something. She didn't have to wait long.
"I need a lawyer."
Despite the situation, she felt herself smile, "I know an excellent one." Meredith turned to face her and looked at the hoodie pensively, "You dropped it," She said gently, holding it out.
She felt the tension in the air then, Meredith gazing into her eyes. Their fingers met as Meredith reached for the hoodie, and she felt electricity shoot through her at the touch. Shit.
"Thanks," Meredith said.
"You're welcome," She felt her eyes drop to the blonde's lips. Fuck.
"Addison," Meredith's voice was quiet, and she felt her body react.
She needed to touch her, needed to kiss her. She held onto Meredith's waist as she gently pushed her against the wall. Like last night, their breath mingled. One beat. Two. The hospital disappeared around them, leaving them in a world of their own. Meredith gazed into her eyes, and she found herself transfixed. But she knew they shouldn't do this. She'd promised herself she wouldn't ruin their marriage.
"We shouldn't."
"Please," Meredith breathed out, and with that one word, she knew that there was no way she could ever tell her no.
She leaned down to capture her lips in a gentle kiss, and she smiled softly as Meredith moaned, returning the kiss just as gently. Meredith arched into her, her fingers tangling into her hair as the kiss was deepened, and she couldn't stop her own moan from slipping out. She pulled back slowly, gazing down into Meredith's hungry eyes, trying to control the urge to kiss her again.
Luckily, or maybe unluckily, their pagers went off in tandem.
Annoyed, Meredith looked at hers, "Bailey."
She couldn't quite stop the smirk from slipping onto her lips, "Chief Hunt."
"I should ah…" Meredith started.
She couldn't resist, just one more kiss. As she pulled away and headed towards the doorway, she spoke, "I'll get my lawyer to draw up those papers for you, Dr. Grey."
"Thanks for the consult, Dr. Montgomery," Came Meredith's immediate reply.
She laughed, "Anytime."
Addison knocked loudly on Owen's door, opening it a bit. She was still on her high from her kiss with Meredith, and she was riding that high quite well.
"You needed to see me?" She questioned, looking into the room.
He smiled at her reassuringly, "Dr. Montgomery, come in."
"Addison," She corrected him.
"Addison," He amended, "I was hoping to talk to you about taking over Arizona's patients while she's recuperating."
She arched an eyebrow, "You know I'm only here to check up on my friends, don't you? I have a private practice in L.A. I have a cat."
"I know, I know, but hear me out."
She looked at the clock and then sat down across from him, "You have 15 minutes before Mark is expecting me upstairs."
Mark wasn't expecting her, but she didn't expect Owen to know that.
"Grey," Bailey called out as Meredith made her way back to the Attendings lounge. Bailey was joined by Alex and April. She was relieved to see that Derek wasn't in the room, "Nice of you to join us."
"Won't happen again," She replied immediately. Bailey looked her over, and she realized she was still holding the hoodie, still not in her scrubs, "I'm still not cleared for surgery," She offered as an explanation.
"Your interns have already been picked out, they arrive in a few weeks," Bailey started to hand her the list before stopping. She looked her over once again, "Unless you'd rather someone else to take over until you're cleared."
"I'll be cleared before the get here," She grabbed for the list and read it over, "I'm fine."
"Is that even a word anymore?" Alex questioned.
She rolled her eyes, "I have a meeting with my therapist today," She looked at the clock and then pulled her hoodie over her head, "And I'm going to be late for it apparently."
Lexie came running into the room, breathing hard, "I'm here. What's wrong?"
Bailey glared at April, who blinked innocently, "You didn't tell me which Grey."
"It was for me, Lexie," She explained to her sister.
"Oh," She looked at the hoodie with a secret smile, "You didn't go to Yale."
She rolled her eyes with her own smile, "Nope, I didn't."
She didn't do hugs. She was dark and twisty. But she would never take her sister's hugs for granted ever again.
"I'm going to go tell Mark!" Lexie said excitedly into her ear.
"Don't you dare," She whispered back, "I haven't even gotten the papers filed."
For the first time in a very long time, Meredith felt free. She hadn't felt trapped in her relationship with Derek, but he always seemed to put his surgeries ahead of her, his career ahead of hers, his ambitions over the family she'd wanted with him. And she deserved more than that. She thought of Addison and smiled softly. Soon, she would be free to love who she wanted.
I make no apologies for how I chose to repair what you broke. She remembered telling Derek that. As she mused, she caught sight of red hair. She looked over Lexie's shoulder to see Addison and Callie coming into the room.
"Have you heard the news?" Callie asked with a smile.
"News?" She pulled from Lexie's hug, looking at the two of them confused.
"Addison is taking over Arizona's cases until Arizona's back."
"Oh great," Alex groaned, but she could hear his smile.
"Just until Robbins is back?" Bailey questioned with a small laugh.
Addison smirked, "For right now."
She had to keep the blush off her face as Bailey looked between her and Addison, "For right now," The woman mimicked.
"You have time before your appointment?" Addison asked, turning to her.
She nodded, and just like in the stairwell, it felt like they were the only two in the room.
"I have to get to the pit," April said, brushing past the two of them and Callie.
"I'm going to check on Mark before rounds," Lexie said, hugging Meredith again before exiting the room.
Callie at Meredith's hoodie with confusion, "I didn't know you went to Yale."
Alex laughed, placing his hand on Callie's shoulder, "Let's go check on Arizona."
"Oh uh," Callie looked back at Addison, "Lunch?"
"Sure," Addison confirmed.
There weren't many things that scared Addison, much less people. But there was something about Miranda Bailey that scared her. Not enough for her to show it, of course, but still. So, when Bailey stepped towards them, she had to force herself not to step back.
"Does Shepherd know?"
"Not about," Meredith stopped and started again, "I'm serving him divorce papers as soon as they're drawn up."
"And how did this," She pointed a finger between them, "start?"
She bit her lip, "Last night, Meredith almost walked out in front of a car."
"That I didn't see." Meredith added.
She sighed softly, squaring her shoulders, laying everything out on the table, "Maybe the feelings started back when we first met, but nothing happened until today. Meredith told Derek she wanted a divorce and threw her rings at him. All we did was kiss."
Bailey looked between them again before she headed to the door, "Fine," The shorter woman looked at her again, "Don't hurt her, Montgomery."
"I won't." And she meant it.
"And you," Meredith looked up at Bailey bewildered, "Have you heard from Yang?"
"No, I was going to call after my session."
Bailey nodded and then smiled softly, "Good." And then she was gone.
Left alone again, she turned to Meredith, wrapping her arms around the blonde, "You do look good in my clothes."
She loved seeing the blush crawl up Meredith's neck, settling warmly on her cheeks, "What did you want to talk about? I really do need to get to my appointment."
She pressed a soft kiss on her lips, unable to resist, "My lawyer is drawing up papers on your behalf. I hope that was okay."
She would never get tired of feeling Meredith pressed against her.
"Yeah," Meredith agreed, "It's fine." She made an annoyed noise from the back of her throat. Meredith smiled at her, "It's perfect."
A/N: Please don't forget to review.