AN: Just a little bit of nonsense. AU as of book 5ish probably but, I'll be honest, there's not a huge amount of plot here to wade through :D

Ron Weasley: Matchmaker

Ron looked over the top of his morning newspaper and resisted the urge to roll his eyes. His friend was sitting opposite, his back bent, his forehead on the table, an occasional groan escaping from between his lips.

"I told you not to drink so much," Ron said, turning the page and wishing he was alone in his kitchen.

"I'm not hungover," the man replied, "although I wish I bloody well was. It would be better than dealing with this abject humiliation."

"Don't be so dramatic," Ron told the mop of black hair as he sipped his coffee. He'd brewed one for the man opposite but it remained untouched by his elbow as he continued to face-plant the table.

"Well what would you call it?"

"A bit bloody pathetic, to be honest. I mean seriously, we practised using his first name for days, you promised me you'd walk up to him and address him by it and then what happens? He comes up to say hello and you go all stony-faced and say, 'Good evening, Potter', not even a bloody smile. Honestly, Sev, I could brain you"

Severus groaned and lifted his head from the table, looking at Ron with a despondent expression. "I just froze. His name stuck in my throat."

Ron rolled his eyes and chucked his paper down on the table, saying, "How the bloody hell are you going to ask him out if you can't even call him by his name?"

"Well obviously I'm not going to ask him out," Severus sneered. "It would be too bloody humiliating."

"So I have to put up with you for the rest of my days, do I? I have to look at your despairing mug over my cornflakes every morning for the rest of my life while you pine away for The Boy Who Lived?"

"Man," Severus corrected with a growl. "He's 25, he's the bloody man who sodding well lived."

"He'll live to be 50 before you pull your head out of your arse and tell him you're in love with him," Ron said exasperatedly, sipping his coffee.

"I am not in love with him," Severus protested fiercely.

"Well you do a bloody good impression of someone who is," Ron retorted. "Is this what you want? To just sit and nurse your feelings for him rather than actually doing something about them?"

"What would you have me do?"

Ron pinched the bridge of his nose and said, "Jesus, Sev, how about being fucking nice to him for once? How about having a conversation where you don't growl and snarl and insult him? How about giving the poor bastard some indication that you can actually stand to be in the same room as him?"

Severus pursed his lips and fiddled with the edge of the newspaper, looking like a chastised teenager. "It's not that easy," he said, and Ron resisted the urge to kick him.

"It's not easy to treat him like a human being? To have a civilised conversation? To give him some inkling that you like him as a person?"

"Oh piss off, you condescending twat."

"Well there's a charming introduction to a Saturday morning," said Draco as he sauntered into the kitchen, his hair wet from the shower and a dressing gown hanging loosely around his frame. "Why is he still in my house?" he asked, leaning over and running his hand over Ron's chest as he kissed him good morning.

"He's your godfather," Ron told his husband as the man reached over and swiped his coffee.

"He's your friend," Draco countered.

"I shall go if I'm not welcome," Severus said, folding his arms.

"See you then," Draco said with a smirk, sliding into the chair next to Ron and stealing his toast.

"I suppose making your own breakfast is out of the question?" Ron asked, resting his hand between Draco's shoulder blades.

"Check our marriage vows, darling. What's yours is mine. So Sev, still pining over Harry?"

Severus' lips went thin and he said, "I'm going home. I don't need to stay here and be insulted."

"No? Where do you usually go?" Draco asked with a smug drawl and Ron smiled in amusement at Severus' perturbed look. "I mean really, what do you expect? You turn up here time and time again, wearing that hangdog expression and mooning around after Harry like a lovesick schoolboy."

Severus' face soured further although Draco was thoroughly unruffled by it. "I am not mooning around after Potter," Severus said through gritted teeth.

"Harry," Ron corrected. "For Merlin's sake, if you're in love with him you should be able to say his name."

"I'm not in love – oh for the love of – I'm going home."

"Toodles," Draco said, sliding a foot up and down Ron's calf. "Don't trip over your devotion to Harry on the way out."

Severus apparated away with a face like thunder and Ron sighed, saying, "You shouldn't wind him up like that."

"He asks for it," Draco replied, finishing Ron's coffee. "He's 45 years old, for God's sake, and he can't tell someone he likes him. It's pathetic."

"Sev and Harry have a complicated history, it doesn't make things easy."

"We have a complicated history," Draco returned, "and we managed to get together."

Ron grinned and said, "Yes, well I don't think Sev's going to win Harry by getting drunk, cornering him at a school reunion and slurring, 'You know, I think you're fit as fuck, fancy a shag?'."

Draco wiggled his eyebrows wit a lascivious smile and said, "Worked on you, didn't it? You married me."

"I'm easily snagged, clearly. With Harry and Sev I fear it'll be more complicated."

"You have a plan, Mr Weasley?" Draco asked, moving closer and slipping a hand into Ron's shirt.

"Well if those two won't help themselves, they'll have to have a little third party intervention."

"I take it nothing that can be put into practice today?" Draco asked as his other hand danced up the inside of Ron's thigh.

Ron raised an eyebrow and said, "You have plans for me, Mr Malfoy?"

"Don't I always?"

"So um…you and Severus went home together on Saturday?"

Ron looked up from the report he was reading to see his best friend looking up at him from the other end of their shared office. He grinned and said, "Yeah, I took him home for a threesome with Drake. He rocked our world."

"Tosser," Harry said with a tut, scratching his forehead. "I just meant…well he stayed at yours…"

"Yes?" Ron prompted, trying not to smile too much. Harry was adorable and thoroughly incapable of subtlety and Ron always enjoyed these little dances they did when Harry would try to wheedle information out of him about Severus.

"Well…did you enjoy the rest of your evening with him? Did he…talk about…things?"

"Things?" Ron repeated innocently. "Oh yes, we talked about things."

Harry's cheeks flushed, a muscle in his jaw twitching. "What sort of things?" he pressed, irritation creeping into his voice.

"Oh all sorts," Ron said breezily, turning his attention back to the report in his hands. He heard Harry's annoyed huff and tried to hide his smile.

"Well like what?" Harry asked, beginning to tap his foot agitatedly. "What did you talk about? Did he mention his work, or what he thought of the party, or…or whether he was seeing anyone?"

The last part was said into his chest as he began playing with his pot of quills, his attempt at being casual falling decidedly short. Ron resisted the urge to roll his eyes, or perhaps chuck something heavy across the room at his friend. Severus might be an emotionally stunted man-child but at least he'd admitted his feelings to himself, which was a damn sight more than Harry had managed.

"He didn't mention anyone, no," Ron said, taking pity on the man and watching as Harry's shoulders relaxed. "What about you?"

"What about me?" Harry asked, looking startled.

"Well did you hit it off with anyone at the party? Get up to anything naughty?"

"No," Harry said, shaking his head. "No one…took my fancy."

Ron raised an eyebrow and said, "Well maybe next time."

Harry had never vocalised his feelings for Severus, not explicitly anyway, but Ron knew his friend better than anyone and could read perfectly between the lines. Harry had had it bad for Severus for years but had managed to do no more than gaze moon-eyed at him from a distance. Between Harry's pining and Severus constantly buzzing in his ear about his feelings, he was ready to throw the pair of them off a cliff.

There was a long silence while Harry re-arranged the various detritus on his desk and, after moving his stack of folders three times, he eventually said, "What do you two talk about?"

"Beg pardon?" Ron said, realising he wasn't going to finish reading his report anytime soon.

"You two," Harry said, dog-earing the edge of his folder then folding it back again. "What the bloody hell do you talk about?"

Harry had never quite understood the friendship that had blossomed between Ron and Severus, indeed most people were baffled by it, but the two men were really quite devoted to one another. It had begun during the war when they'd been partnered together on assignments. They'd sniped and argued for months but eventually those arguments had turned into contests of one-upmanship and Ron had realised that he enjoyed their verbal sparring.

He had no longer been afraid of the man and began to find him funny and intriguing, able to see past the layers of snark and barb-tongued comments to the man beneath. He found himself enjoying Severus' company and their arguments slowly turned into conversations, ones that would often stretch long into the night. What began as a partnership of necessity developed into a genuine friendship and Ron held Severus as highly as he did Harry.

"We talk about the same kind of things that you and I do," Ron said with a shrug.

Harry gave him a sceptical look and said, "You talk about quidditch and your sex lives?"

Ron snorted. "No, not exactly. We just…talk about life stuff. I don't know, Harry, next time I'll make a list of the topics and let you know."

"I just…I just don't understand how you find it so easy to talk to him," Harry said, his expression despondent.

Not being head over heels in love with him helps, Ron thought wryly, but instead said, "We've known each other a long time. We understand one another."

"Must be nice," Harry said sulkily and Ron wondered how much time he'd get in Azkaban for hexing the Slayer of Voldemort.

"Ah, there are the two sexiest aurors in the business," said Draco as he came sweeping into the office. He planted a wet, sloppy kiss on Ron's lips then did the same to Harry.

"Must you?" Harry protested, wiping his mouth with his sleeve.

"Don't want you to feel left out," Draco said with a grin, settling himself in Ron's lap.

"I'll survive, trust me."

"What are you doing here, love?" Ron asked his husband as the man continued to use him as an armchair.

"Deposition," Draco replied. "The client's being a bastard but we've got him banged to rights. Case should be closed in a day or two."

"Congratulations."

"Thanks. Take me out to lunch to celebrate. Face-ache over here can come too."

"Who says I want to come?" Harry asked moodily.

"Oh he's so cute when he sulks," Draco said, getting up from Ron's lap and moving over to Harry to pinch his cheeks. "Can we keep him? Shall we take him home with us?"

"Get off me, you pillock," Harry groused, slapping Draco hands away.

"Cheer up, darling. Maybe you'll find someone to take your mind off things tonight."

"Tonight?" Harry echoed.

"Dinner at George and Neville's," Draco said, examining his fingernails.

"Oh…I was thinking of crying off."

"Oh shame," Draco said casually, straightening his cuffs and brushing imaginary lint from his sleeves. "Sev's going to be there."

Ron watched as Harry's eyebrows rose and he tried to school his features into passive interest. "Is he?" Harry asked. "Well…maybe I'll pop by…just to be sociable."

"Yes," Draco said with a cutesy smile. "Can't hurt to be sociable."

Ron wasn't sure he would ever get used to seeing his brother kissing Neville but he couldn't deny that they made a pretty cute couple. They seemed incapable of leaving one another alone for too long and always migrated back to one another for a kiss or a cuddle. It was pretty sweet to see them together; George constantly had an arm wrapped around Neville's waist and Neville was forever gazing adoringly at George.

"Don't they make you sick?"

Ron turned his head as Severus sat beside him on the sofa. "I was just thinking they were quite cute actually."

"Don't be insane. I'm in danger of losing my dinner."

"You don't have a single romantic bone in your body, do you?"

"I try not to."

Severus had been working with George for a couple of years, helping create new products and devise new lines alongside his mail order potions business. They worked well together and had had several successes with their inventions. They managed to socialise on occasion although they'd never quite developed the friendship that Severus had with Ron.

"Have you spoken with Harry yet?"

Severus sipped at his scotch and said, "No."

"Oh for fuck's sake," Ron sighed. "Look, he's over there nursing his glass of wine. He's obviously trying to impress you."

"How do you work that one out?"

"He's wearing his 'come get me' outfit. He always wears that when he's out on the pull."

"Oh, out on the pull regularly is he?" Severus asked, his lip curling.

"Well he wouldn't be if you pulled your finger out and made a move, would he? You could be the one taking him home and introducing him to untold pleasures that have his eyes rolling backwards."

"Would you shut up?" Severus hissed. "He'll hear you."

"Good. Maybe then you'd work up the nerve to tell him you're in love with him and you could act out all those little fantasies you've spent months wanking over."

"I really hate you"

"No you don't. Harry!" Ron called, and felt Severus' nails dig into his thigh. He ignored it and said, "Harry mate, come on over!"

Harry, with his hands shoved in the pockets of his very tight jeans, shuffled over, his cheeks flushing as he nodded at Severus.

"Harry, tell Sev about that illegal potions ring we broke up last month," Ron said with an encouraging smile.

Harry went to perch on the edge of the sofa but Ron shoved up and pulled him down to squash in between himself and Severus, Severus' eyes widening and Harry's body stiffening. "Go on," Ron encouraged, "tell him all about how you tracked the leader down."

"Oh," said Harry, pushing his glasses up his nose. "Well it was nothing really," he said, trying to move his thigh from pressing up against Severus' but Ron held his legs out wide and stopped him from moving.

"Sounds fascinating," Severus said dryly, and Ron stopped himself from reaching over and smacking the man upside the head.

"Severus," he said pointedly, "tell Harry about the breakthrough you've made with sleeping draughts."

"I added a different amount of powdered boomslang skin."

"Oh."

"Merlin's fucking gonads," Ron said in exasperation. "I need a drink."

He hauled himself off the sofa and stalked into the kitchen, grabbing a bottle of whatever was nearest and necking a few hearty glugs. He winced as it burnt his throat and opened his eyes to see his brother looking at him with amusement.

"Problem?" George asked, offering him a glass.

He ignored it and swigged from the bottle again, shuddering at the taste and saying, "I have never met two more irritating people in my life."

George peered around the kitchen door and grinned. "Oh, those two. Pathetic, aren't they?"

Ron looked at his friends. They were both sitting in silence, their backs ramrod straight as their eyes darted around the room. "I'm ready to knock their heads together. I'll be drawing my pension by the time they sort themselves out."

"Well you can't expect conventional methods to work on those two. A little gentle nudging isn't going to cut it, is it?"

"What do you suggest then?"

A devious smile spread across George's face and Ron was transported back to his childhood, watching as his brothers came up with another nefarious scheme. "I have just the thing," George said, and Ron felt a little shiver go through him.

Harry sat at the table in the posh restaurant in the wizarding quarter of Bath, looking around to see if Ron had arrived yet. They were meant to be meeting at eight and it was now quarter past; it was unlike his friend to be late. He perused the wine menu and was considering ordering a very pricey Chablis when a shadow fell over the table.

He looked up and saw Severus standing there, looking very uncomfortable. "Good evening, Mr Potter," he said stiffly. "I um…I was meant to meet Ron."

"So was I," Harry said, confused. "Um…sit down, please."

Severus shifted awkwardly into the chair opposite Harry and laced his fingers together. "I assume he's forgotten he made an appointment with either of us."

"Yeah maybe," Harry said, feeling his heart start to pound. He was rarely on his own with Severus and he never knew how to act. He was 25 and yet, around the former spy, he always felt like a tongue-tied teenager.

"Gentlemen," said a waiter, appearing at their table and bearing a tray with a couple of drinks. "I have a message from Mr Weasley. He says he's been unavoidably detained but would like you to have these brandies on him while you wait."

He put the drinks on the table and left them with a smile. Harry picked his up and downed it in one, receiving a raised eyebrow from Severus. "Long day," he said by way of an explanation and Severus took a few sips of his own.

Harry licked the brandy from his lips and took a deep breath. "How was your day?"

"Fine, thank you. I was just putting the finishing touches to my article for Potions Monthly."

"Ah. Sounds interesting."

"Well, probably not compared to your work."

"Oh it's mostly paperwork. We're only in the field about 20% of the time."

Severus gave him a wry smile and said, "You forget that I hear first-hand accounts from Ron. I know just how much time you spend in the field and how dangerous it can be."

Harry shrugged and said, "Sometimes, I suppose. To be honest, half the battle is having a partner you can trust with your life and who complements your strengths and weaknesses. I wouldn't be able to do my job effectively without Ron."

"He says much the same about you. It stands to reason after all your years together."

Harry nodded with a smile. "Can't get rid of the bugger. Thank God Draco's around to pick up some of the slack."

"Apologies again, gentlemen," said the waiter as he appeared beside them once more. "I have another message from Mr Weasley."

He handed Harry the letter and Severus a box of chocolates, which Severus accepted with a confused frown. Harry opened the letter and read aloud,

'Dear Harry and Sev,

Apologies for doing this, and please forgive my underhand methods, but frankly I can't take your pathetic behaviour anymore. The brandies you were given have been laced with veritaserum, which should be kicking in any minute now. I suggest you use the portkey, which I believe Sev is holding, which will take you to a nice, secure location where you can finally air all your pent-up feelings once and for all. You'll thank me for this one day.

Ron'

Harry looked up at Severus in horror, seeing the same expression reflected in the man's features. His mind immediately went into panic mode and he grabbed the other end of the box of chocolates just as the portkey activated and transported them both out of the restaurant.

"Why the fuck did I do that?" he asked as they landed. "Why didn't I just go home? I'm going to kill Ron. I'm going to kill him slowly and painfully and distribute parts of his body to the four corners of the globe!"

"Potter, would you calm down for a moment?" Severus said and Harry wheeled around to look at him in disbelief.

"Calm down?" he echoed. "Calm down? You do realise what's happening don't you? You do realise that I'm about to humiliate myself in the worst way possible?"

"I know exactly what's about to happen but as we appear to be stuck in this…hotel room I don't see what we can actually do."

Harry took that moment to stop and finally take stock of where they'd ended up. "Oh that bastard," he said as he recognised the room.

"You know where we are?" Severus asked.

"Oh yes," Harry said, cataloguing all the dark magic he knew to use on his so-called friend. "We broke up an illegal trafficking ring here."

"What were they trafficking?"

"Not important. What they used this room for is the pertinent issue."

"And that would be?" Severus asked, agitation creeping into his voice.

"It's a fealty room."

"I beg your pardon?"

"A fealty room," Harry said with a sigh, throwing himself down into an armchair. "Criminal rings use them to ensure those in their teams are loyal. The room won't let you out until your true feelings are revealed."

"Merlin's balls," Severus hissed.

Harry buried his head in his hands and said, "Between that and the veritaserum my life is officially over. How could he do this to me?"

"To us, Mr Potter," Severus corrected, suddenly pale. "And here I was thinking he was my friend."

Harry looked up at him with a thoughtful frown and said, "Why has he done this to you too? I mean, why dose you with the veritaserum too? Surely he just wants me to spill my guts and die from the humiliation."

A muscle in Severus' jaw twitched and he perched on the edge of the armchair opposite. He looked as though he would like to throw himself out of the window and Harry could sympathise.

"I believe he feels there are some things I should say to you."

"We can fight it though, right?" Harry asked desperately. "I mean…there have been cases of people fighting off the effects and if anyone knows how surely you do."

Severus shook his head. "I have no idea. We're doomed."

Harry slumped in his chair and wondered if perhaps he could use magic to sew his mouth shut. He wasn't ready for this, he wasn't ready to vocalise how he felt to anyone, least of all the man who had a staring role in all his romantic daydreams. He'd been in love with him for so long and had kept that love a closely guarded secret that it was almost painful to consider bringing it into the light.

"What things?" he asked, looking over at Severus.

"Sorry?"

"You said that Ron felt there were some things you should say to me. What things?"

Severus stayed silent and Harry said, "You're going to have to tell me sooner or later. Neither of us has any choice in the matter. I mean…is it bad? Do you need to tell me that you're sick of me hanging around and you only put up with me for Ron's sake, or that…that I'm a pain in the arse or…or – "

"Harry, for Merlin's sake, stop rambling," Severus said, pinching the bridge of his nose, and Harry was so startled by the use of his first name he snapped his mouth shut.

Severus stood up and began pacing the room, growling, "Couldn't that red-headed menace have provided us with some alcohol? He's put us in this deplorable situation, surely he could have given us something to take the edge off!"

"Look Severus," Harry said, getting to his feet and feeling proud he hadn't tripped over the man's name, "I'm a big boy. If there's something you want to say then just say it. I'm sure you've been dying to tell me what you really think of me so go on, let me have it."

One black eyebrow rose and an unreadable look crossed Severus' face. "What do you think I want to say to you?"

"Well I don't know!" Harry said with an exasperated huff. "Probably that I'm a snot-brained half-wit who only defeated Voldemort thanks to sheer dumb luck and now that's done and dusted you'd really prefer not to have to associate with me further because you've had more than enough of saving my scrawny arse."

"Your arse is not scrawny," Severus said, his eyes widening and his cheeks flushing as he realised what he'd said. "I just mean…you're a grown man now with a very…healthy physique."

Nonplussed, Harry just gaped at Severus, the wheels in his head starting to grin into action. "Do you…do you fancy me?" he asked, the words themselves sounding ridiculous.

"No," Severus growled out through clenched teeth.

"Oh," Harry said, feeling embarrassment blossom in his chest. "Well no of course you don't. Why would you?"

"I do not fancy you, Mr Potter," Severus said, his chest rising and falling as though he was exerting great effort. "I certainly feel nothing so puerile, nothing so simple."

Harry swallowed around the lump in his throat. "What…what do you feel then?"

"What do I feel?" Severus echoed. "Well, let's see, shall we?" He stepped closer and Harry felt a thrill to through him. "I think you're the most beautiful man I've ever had the privilege of setting eyes on. I think you're kind, intelligent, brave, resourceful, creative and a million other things I couldn't possibly put into words. In short, I am head over heels in love with you and I feel like a prize fool because what would a beautiful young man with the world at his feet want with a washed-up ex-Death Eater who's a pariah in most social circles?"

Harry blinked at him in stunned amazement, his world making no sense at that moment whatsoever. He was tempted to pinch himself to make sure he wasn't dreaming but he could feel the veritaserum compelling him to speak.

"What would I want with you? Gee, I can't imagine what I could possibly want with a darkly handsome, fiercely intelligent, staggeringly brave man who I've spent the last few years fantasising about."

"You're joking," Severus said guardedly.

"I bloody well am not! I've been in love with you since I was 19 and I spend far more time than is healthy fantasising about being with you. I thought it would go away as I got older but it's only got worse and worse! I daydream about you all the time, you're the only thing I can ever think about!"

They stared at one another, both breathing heavily and looking absolutely stunned. Harry wanted to stuff the words back into his mouth but it was an impossibility. Besides, he couldn't un-hear what Severus had said, not that he wanted to.

"You're in love with me?" he asked in a breathless whisper.

Severus' cheeks hollowed for a moment as he pursed his lips, looking as though he was fighting with himself. "I am," he confirmed with a defeated sigh. "I've tried not to be, I've fought against it and told myself it's ridiculous but the heart, it seems, is not to be dictated to."

"Fucking tell me about it," Harry said with a snort. "I've spent years telling myself that I was just imagining things, that it was some kind of childish infatuation but I can't shake myself out of it. I'm hopelessly lost."

There was another silence and Harry wished he'd mastered Legilimency. He wanted to know what the other man was thinking, wanted to know why a frown had settled between the dark brows and whether or not he was about to get his heart broken. They were in a strange kind of limbo; the truth was now out there, it couldn't be taken back and neither seemed to know what to do now.

"I think we're both idiots," Severus said eventually and Harry gave a nervous laugh.

"You figure?" he said, wondering what would be next out of the man's mouth.

Severus nodded. "Certainly. Two grown men in love with one another and it's taken a situation like this to get us to confess our feelings. Well…I didn't suffer through 20 years of spying and subterfuge only to live my life afraid of my own heart. Harry, I love you and, quite frankly, I'm sick of pining away for you when I could be leading a rich and fulfilling life with you in it."

Harry squared his shoulders. He wasn't a Gryffindor for nothing and he wasn't about to be outdone in the bravery stakes by a Slytherin. "Well," he said, gathering his courage, "I love you too and I'm not keen on spending the rest of my days a lovesick fool either."

Severus' lip quirked into a half smile and Harry's stomach fluttered the way it usually did when Severus pulled such an expression. "As I'm compelled to tell the truth," Harry said, feeling suddenly giddy with the lightness he felt at having finally unburdened himself, "I feel I have to tell you that if you don't kiss me in the next 60 seconds I may go mad."

"Well we can't have that," Severus said with a smirk. He moved closer and slid a hand over Harry's waist while his other one cupped Harry's cheek gently. Harry's heart was beating so fast he thought it might burst out of his chest and his mind could hardly comprehend that his most hoped-for wish was coming true.

Severus' lips met his and fire shot through Harry's body. He wrapped his arms around the man's neck and pulled his body flush against him. It was glorious, it was wonderful, it was everything Harry had imagined and more. It was sensual and slow, Severus' hand hot in the small of his back as he held him close.

"The sensible thing," Harry said as he pulled back, breathless, "would be to have a mature conversation about what we want to do and how we want to move forward."

"That would be sensible," Severus agreed, his hand moving to cup Harry's backside as his eyes simmered with lust.

"But as we're both idiots I think perhaps we should skip that and get straight to you fucking me into the middle of next week."

"That's the best idea you've ever had."

"How do you think they're getting on?"

"They've either killed one another or they're shagging each other's brains out."

Draco grinned at his husband as he slid into bed next to him and said, "Let's hope it's the latter, eh?" Ron lifted up his arm and Draco tucked himself into the man's side, running his hand over the man's toned torso. "I can't believe you used veritaserum on them."

Ron laughed and said, "Don't be daft, of course I didn't."

Draco raised his head to look up at the man and said, "What do you mean?"

"As if I'd dose them with veritaserum, Merlin only know what would come tumbling out! It was enough that they'd thought they had been."

"And the fealty room?"

"Just a replica. We dismantled the original room weeks ago. There was no magic involved at all.

"You little sneak," Draco said with an approving smile.

"It was George's idea; I just arranged the nuts and bolts."

"They're going to kill you, you do know that, don't you?"

"Why do you think we're going on holiday tomorrow? By the time those two come up for air we'll be on the other side of the planet, nice and safe," Ron said with a grin as he raked his fingers through Draco's hair.

"Do you think they'll ever forgive you?" Draco asked as his hand began to move lower, his fingers teasing the waistband of Ron's pyjama bottoms.

"Sure," Ron said as he rolled Draco onto his back with a wicked grin. "In about ten years, perhaps. Anyway, enough about those two. Fancy helping your husband get lucky?"

"Have you even known me to say no?"

"Mm, I love my life."

AN: I couldn't resist, this little ficlet has been swimming around in my head for months and I just had to write it finally. I hope you all enjoyed it and that it made you smile. Please leave a review and let me know.