Sirius' Tomboy:

A/N: I'm still using a side of James that I nicked from the fanfic "Coconuts and Lily Evans" by Moonstone. It's a long one-shot but go check it out it's great.

Disclaimer: I don't own this world J.K.Rowling has created because (pfft!) Sirius Black would never have died. He was too hot to die, don't you guys understand?

"What are you on about? Milk's the best!"

Lily Evans' footsteps echoed in the silence of the Great Hall and I idly wondered if James would actually die. But looking over to the teachers table Dumbledore wasn't in any state of worry, in fact his blue eyes were twinkling in amusement.

Lily stopped right in front of James and I could hear, rather than see him gulp. But then a familiar smell I hated entered my nose. Freaking tomatoes!

My eyes darted over to where the fruit was being held in Lily fist. The red juice that was dripping down her hand was easily contrasting against her porcelain skin.

"So you don't like coconuts?" Lily asked slowly as if thinking over something.

"Yeah I said that before didn't I?" James responded nervously, his eyes wide behind his glasses.

Whatever they were saying went right over my head as I fully focused on the fruit in Lily's hands. Slowly the hand relaxed then started moving backwards then forward in one swift movement.

Knowing what was going to happen I squished my face into Sirius's chest with a shout of (so what if I was touching the school's heartthrob but I wasn't going to worsen my phobia again), "not today!"

Then came the noise I was waiting for the squelch of that fruit hitting innocent skin, a harsh breath then more silence.

But...

"Faith, Faith, you've got to look." Sirius breath warm on my neck from the position we were in, his words choked up with laughter.

I didn't move for a moment but them Sirius started shaking me with ridiculous vigor, his hands easily finding their way to my shoulders.

With a groan, I carefully pulled my face from the place that was safe of certain red fruits to look up at him. "What is it?"

"Just. Look." His words were reduced to whispers by the amount of laughter he was trying to keep at bay.

I lifted myself off him and turned around to see a sight.

Lily wasn't aiming for me at all, despite my reflex, but she got the next best thing: James.

Over the journey from her hand to James' face the tomato had been transfigured into what I'd recently learnt was James' worst fear.

His face was covered in coconut pulp and Lily's palm was still rubbing it in, his glasses were taking the brunt of it. Her face was alight with satisfaction while James was frozen, his mouth gaping in a silent never-ending scream.

A few seconds later it seemed like Lily was done with her piece of 'art' as she stood a step away to analyse James not unlike a painter with their creation.

She snapped out of it within a second with a, "Come on girls, let's go."

Like a shoot for a movie, her friends stood up in one fluid motion, looking as if they walked out of the Great Hall with everyone's eyes on them everyday. Oh wait. They did. The girls went with the swishes of their school-appropriate skirts and left behind the silent Great Hall.

"What are we gonna do with you Prongs?" Sirius' amused sigh seemed to reach every person's ears and like a switch, the mutterings and talk of the students of Hogwarts returned.

"J-james are you alright? Remus is he alright?" Peter's worried voice was just heard over the chattering.

Sirius cut in before Remus could speak, "Wormy he's just been lathered in his worst nightmare but by the best person he could dream of."

Remus raised his eyebrows and said, "for once I agree with Sirius, Peter, so he should be fine after a while like the several other times Lily 'touched' him."

Sirius snorted, "Those touches definitely weren't gentle."

"No innuendos," I interrupted. "I've not even drank a cup of milk yet."

"And whose milk would that be?" Sirius asked, a crap-eating grin on his face.

I slapped his chest repeatedly for every word. "No. Innuendos. Until. I've. Had. My. Morning. Milk."

"Oh, so it's yours. Kinky." His grin grew at my exasperated face.

I tried not to laugh and ignored him as hitting seemed not to work in shutting him up. He didn't stop did he? Was this what the girls liked about him? His annoyingness?

I stood up talking to Remus and Peter since James seemed to be out for the count and I was still ignoring Sirius. "I'm going down the table to look for milk and maybe spot Tulberry."

Peter spoke up clearly despite the amount of food in his mouth, okay now that was impressive. "Isn't there any here?"

"No." I answered, if there was I would have smelt it ages ago... and I would have drank it all, I thought with a wince. I'm a terrible milk hoarder. I guess after all these years, Tulberry's tendencies have rubbed off on me.

I waved and strolled down the Gryffindor table, scouting for the drink and T.B but careful of not being close enough to them. I wasn't going to tempt fate now was I? I wanted to get through my first day back more or less as I started: unscathed.

"Hiya." I had approached Ebony Richards and her friends who sat around her.

"Hi!" She and the girls all smiled when they saw me. "Thanks for helping me last year."

"Nah, it was fine," I smiled back at the black-haired girl. "How is your dad anyway?"

"He's recovered very well, since I came crying to you!" She laughed.

"Like I said at the time and I'll say again, it's no problem. You were going through a hard time anyone would want help through that."

Then she did what I wasn't expecting; she jumped up and hugged me.

"It's alright...erm...are you alright?" I awkwardly raised my arms and copy her actions.

It had been a... while since I'd had hugs from people outside family members. Her eyes were shimmering and I couldn't help but raid my mind of anything I could have said to hurt her.

"No, I'm just being being silly," she giggled using one hand to rub her blue eyes. "Is there anything I could do to pay you back?"

"Erm..." Kind of embarrassed with the prolonged hug (I needed to work on that) I asked, "have you seen my cat?"

"Yeah!" She giddily answered, "I saw her prowling around earlier so I gave her some of my scrambled egg."

Thankfully she let go of me as I playfully responded with, "the only thing that you could pay me back by is lending me your jug of milk."

The three girls all laughed, happy looks in their eyes as they gave me the jug of my favourite drink of all time. Yep, Tulberry definitely has rubbed off on me.

"See you later girls and if there's anything bothering you remember you can always talk to me about it." I reminded them, my heart light with the happiness I could see in Ebony's past sad eyes.

At their nods and goodbyes I turned around in the Marauders direction but not before catching a glimpse of the grinning female who had replaced me in my ex-group: Marlene Mcminnon.

It immediately damped my happy mood and I sighed. I still didn't understand why she hated me since even when I used to hang around people who hated her, I was still always nice to her like I was to everyone else. I frowned then plastered a fake smile on my downcast face in case the boys saw me. Why is life so complica-

My thoughts were interrupted when I almost tripped over my feet and the jug of milk almost spilled everywhere. The only reason I had thrown off the hex I recognized as the leg-lock jinx was because...

I whipped my neck around to catch sight of Mary McDonald smirking at the others and I wondered why her tripping me up with a hex didn't surprise me.

Aren't my old friends delightful.

Or maybe Fate just really wanted me to suffer.

I carried on the journey to the Marauders side of the table keeping up the happy facade.

"Are you okay?" The concerned tone on Remus was startling and almost made me drop the jug again. Why do I keep making people who actually care about me worry?

"Yeah, yeah, fine." I lied, placing the milk jug hard on the table but light enough so a drop wasn't spilt.

"Most people after being hexed by a leg-lock don't usually feel fine after." Sirius said, carefully taking the jug from in front of me and pouring the milk into my goblet. A frown was pulling at the corner of his mouth as he avoided looking at me.

"Yeah they're normally hurt." Carried on Peter rubbing a non-existent bruise on his cheek that he sported when the Marauders clashed with Malfoy and the older Slytherins last year. The bruise was there for weeks.

My eyes widened and danced between their faces, "you guys know?"

"We all know," Remus but in softly. "The question is why you were able to throw it off like second nature?"