Sirius' Tomboy:
A/N: if you fail at all things, just make sure you can yeet the people who get in your way — selveyet
Disclaimer: Nope, nopey, nope. I don't own the world of HP because if I did Hogwarts would only allow in cats for students.
"So... he's in Lily-land?"
"Let's first focus on, erm, reviving James." I dodged the question then tried to smile but the fake thing easily slid off my face.
The three boys gave each other looks and gestures, well only Sirius made the exaggerated gestures, but I couldn't understand any of it if I tried. It was something I'm only close enough to my siblings to do so these guys must be close. Wait—what am I on about? They're the frigging Marauders.
"Then let's get started." Remus said, only giving me a pointed look that told me I wasn't off the hook and turned his attention to the still-frozen James.
Sirius's small frown didn't leave his face as he glanced at me and it almost made me tell them the truth there and then. Happy people aren't supposed to look so troubled.
But then he told me, "drink your milk," and turned to face Remus.
I silently followed his order and watched as he asked Remus, "so can I wake up James now?"
Remus sighed like the answer was going to hurt him and he said, "Yes. But don't hurt him as much as last time."
Sirius winked, most of his sadness gone. That's good. "I'm sorry Moony, but you must know by now that I can't make many promises I can keep."
"But you gave him a bruise last time." Peter highlighted and I almost choked on my drink, how hard does he hurt his friends to make them bruise? But my ex-friends have done worse so I can't really say anything...
"And...?" Sirius' eyebrows ruffled as if trying to get what the problem was. I swear he's crazy.
"Just hurry up Sirius." Remus groaned looking like it was near the time of his transformation.
He had told me he was a werewolf last year when something happened concerning him and Severus Snape. Remus looked so sad at the time and I knew he blamed himself and he distanced himself from the guys but after a few talks over a few weeks, I finally got him to realise that it was an accident, what ever 'it' was.
"Jeez Moony, where's your trust in me?" Sirius moaned dramatically.
Remus gave him a look similar to Tulberry's stricter ones. Hey!—where was my cat anyway?
"OK. OK. I won't hurt him that much." He seemed to be as scared of Remus' look as I was of T.B's.
Sirius swiftly stood up and stepped around me to James and said in a sing-song voice, "Prongs if you don't respond in ten seconds I will do what happened to you last time."
I stopped drinking my milk to ask a question. "What's Sirius going to do?"
Peter grumbled when it was clear Remus wasn't going to answer, "bruise James' arm again."
I just absently nodded and turned back to watch Sirius.
"7... 6... 5... 4, 3, 2, 1, Punch time!" Sirius exclaimed, speeding up halfway through the countdown.
Before I could blink, Sirius swung his arm back and punched James' arm when he brought it forward.
"Bloody hell!Padfoot!" James shouted as he clutched his arm. "What in Merlin's pants was that for!?"
I seemed like pain was the only way to bring back James from Lily-land. A world of pain.
"Sirius I told you not to go hard on him." Remus annoyedly moaned through his fingers that covered his face. By the way he was acting it was clear he didn't like seeing any of his friends in pain. I wish I could say the same for them.
"I'll have you know that's impossible because I am straight." Sirius said with a smirk that rivaled Malfoy's.
I turned around on the bench to kick him on the leg and muffled my snort when I saw how irritated James looked. I wordlessly cast a scourgify on his glasses so Sirius could see the daggers I could just feel coming off James.
Sirius let out a groan of hurt, distracted, and I laughed at his pain, "ha, ha! That's what you get for not listening to me and purposely being annoying."
I was possibly injuring one of the school's icons and I didn't really care. What was the world coming to?
James grabbed Sirius as he stood up and made to take a hit at him but Sirius slipped out of his grasp.
"Come back here, you dog!" James shouted as he chased after him down the Gryffindor table after Sirius.
The kick I gave him sadly didn't seem to injure him as much as I wanted, judging by the way he was easily running.
Sirius shouted cheerfully, "sorry James, can't let you do that. My handsomeness needs to be shown to the world!"
I looked at the figures running around the Great Hall with amusement, "Rem, are they gonna be alright?"
His hands seemed to be permanently stuck to his face but he smiled slightly saying, "this happens every time. Sometimes James gets him, sometimes he doesn't but it isn't normally in front of the whole school."
I suddenly felt a small, warm body brushing against my leg and I breathed a sigh of relief. "Tulberry, where have you been?"
"You found her?" Peter asked slightly nervous, while Remus pulled away the hands I believed were superglued to his face.
"Yep!" And I lifted her from underneath the table over the near-empty plates and into Remus' now free arms. "It's your turn to hold her now Rem!"
However Tulberry seemed more focused on climbing Remus' neck and lying there, than just letting him hold her.
"Is-is this normal because animals usually hate me—" Remus started looking anxiously at Tulberry.
I knew he was thinking that she should hate him because he was a werewolf but I was ready to dismiss that thought.
She loved my uncle Stephen and he was one. T.B and Stephen were attached to the hip whenever he visited and it took catnip and a bunch of treats to pull them apart when it approached the end of a holiday.
"Rem it's fine. Her lying on your neck means she really likes you." I stated while I chuckled at Peter, who was nervously moving away from T.B.
But before I finished Remus was shaking his head, "you don't need to humor me."
"I'm not," I argued, ready to stop Remus doubting himself again. "She only does that to me and my uncle, who, btw, is a werewolf Remus, and it now seems like she'll forever do it to you too."
I gave him a moment for what I said to settle in his mind, "just because you are what you are, doesn't mean you should always be expecting the worst thing to happen."
Tulberry miaowed and rubbed her nose against his neck in agreement, "maybe it helps so you don't gain hope to lose it but when the best thing that happens happens, don't disbelieve it."
I smiled when Peter leaned over, carefully distancing himself from T.B he gave Remus an awkwardly arranged hug. But it was a hug nonetheless (it was better than the ones I could give anyway).
"You look too sad," was the only warning we got before a coconut-y James appeared behind Remus and Peter, and threw his arms over their shoulders.
"I'm happier now." Remus said, a sincere smile on his face. Happy people look much better when they're happy.
"OK," James said, all earlier anger gone but he still hugged his friends while coconut pulp dripped down his face.
Before there was another moment of peace, a now bruised Sirius appeared near James with a complaint. "Why aren't I in the hug?"
I covered my snickers with my beautiful drink of milk I had unforgivably left on the table.
When no-one answered he strode up to the Remus-hug and added himself to the pile, "Now it's complete because nothing's complete without me, Sirius Black."
"I don't think the Great Hall is big enough to hold your ego Sirius." I added, chuckling at his comment about himself.
As we laughed at him trying to think of a comeback, Professor McGonnagall click-clacked over to us.
"What is all this ruckus about, and so early in the morning?" She asked, her question aimed at the coconut-covered James and the ever-rowdy Sirius.
"Nothing Minnie, we're just giving Mooney some emotional support." Sirius said with a wink that made Remus' eye twitch.
'Minnie' sighed in defeat at his nickname for her. No matter how many times she had told him to stop and all the detentions she gave him, he just wouldn't.
"Well, I hope Mr Lupin is feeling better," McGonnagall said sincerely. "Here are your timetables for this year. Try to be better behaved."
Sirius just sent her another wink this time accompanied by a finger gun, "can't make you this promise Minnie but I can make one that involves a ring."
Having been subjected to Sirius for now the sixth year, McGonnagall knew it was best to just carry on walking down the table to pass out the rest of the Gryffindor time tables.
"Aww, rejected Padfoot!" James laughed as he slapped him on the back when they ended the Remus-hug.
"Whatever Jamsie, I'll get her someday," Sirius promised, "unlike you with Lily."
But the joke that normally knocked a bit off James ego surprisingly added to it.
"But Pads, you seem to forget that she willingly touched my face and let me just say she wasn't repulsed." James proudly stated.
"Blah, blah, blah," Sirius said, mimicking James. "You say it as if she was feeling something else."
Remus, who was surveying his time table with T.B, promptly choked on air while Peter tittered and I howled with laughter. Why did I find his dirty jokes hilarious? But they were high standard jokes. I wonder if he created them on the spot.
"Normally I'd... be hitting... him but..." I tried to explain to Remus' look but didn't get much more out through my laughter as the boys made their way to sit down.
"It's alright Faith, you don't need to deny my hilaribility." Sirius stated as he plonked down in his seat.
"Yeah, of course that word is real and of course you're hilarious Padfoot. I'm sure it's not that people just laugh at your ugly mug." James grumbled. I think we had made fun of him a bit much this morning.
"Stop being a moany-pants James you know we're only messing." Sirius advised absentmindedly while he messed with his hair. "What have you got first lesson anyway?"
He stretched around me and swiped James' timetable from him when he didn't answer. "Hah! You've got Care of Magical Creatures first!"
"You say it as if you forget I chose that." James mumbled. Yep, definitely a tad too much this morning.
"James remember," I leaned over to my left to whisper to him. "You still have a chance with Lilly and he, unsurprisingly, has none with McGonagall."
It seemed like the words did the trick as he snorted and rolled his eyes at Sirius.
"What are you two whispering about?" Sirius, the gossip, wanted to know.
"None of your business." I stated back with a knowing smile.
"Hmph, meanies. What lesson do we have first Moony?" Sirius asked boredly.
"Why don't you look yourself. You went all that way to get James' what's stopping you from getting your own?" Remus asked dryly.
"It's effort I can't be bothered doing." Sirius replied lazily, his head resting on the table.
"We've got Ancient Runes, lazybones." I said, putting my timetable in my bag after I'd checked.
"Yes! Professor Brent is my fave." Sirius said with sudden happiness, standing up. "Can we leave now?"
"Your so lucky that you've got Mr Brent. He's well better than Professor Kettleburn. She hates me." James complained, following Sirius in standing up.
"You mean she finds you totally annoying." Sirius said matter-of-factly.
Wait - so these guys eat food, get hit by food, run around and then leave?
"What?" I asked, lost.
I never really kept track of popular people's lives. Well until now that is.
"We're going to first lesson now. Well, we normally do once the lot of them have stopped mucking about." Remus said, standing up while being careful not to make Tulberry fall.
She was determined to keep her spot on Remus' neck and I almost laughed at the familiar scene. Almost.
But I pulled a face as I rose from my seat, "are any of your lives simple?"
"With my wonderful parents, Slytherin duels and a 'furry little problem' I think not." Sirius answered, counting along on his fingers.
"Ok, ok but what do you mean your parents?" I cautiously asked.
I had heard rumours about Sirius's life that went around the school. And the things said about his parents weren't 'wonderful' at all. They sounded just as wonderful as my old friends are.
"Nothing. Nothing for you to worry about." Sirius said briskly and stood up. I guess it wasn't something to be talked about with a virtual stranger. I don't blame him.
"Are we going?" Peter questioned, looking dejected at the food magically refilling on the empty plates.
"Sorry Pete, we might sneak into the Kitchens later on for you." James added, as he picked up his bag.
At the mention of the Kitchens, Peter's eyes lit up but that didn't stop him from picking up a bacon rasher from the table as walked.
"Why don't you have something healthy, like apples Wormy?" Sirius moaned, picking up the fruit from a random person and gave them a wink in return.
He seemed to have worn off the quiet spell and was back to normal. Guess it was impossible for people like Sirius to be silent for a long time.
"Because bacon tastes nicer." Peter argued, stuffing the rasher in his mouth before anyone could say otherwise.
"Can't argue with him there Padfoot,'' James commented while Remus and I nodded.
"Whatever, but just in case, catch Wormy." With that short warning Sirius threw the green apple over the table to Peter.
Peter let out a squeak of surprise that was similar to the one he let out when he held Tulberry. Then he held out both hands towards Sirius to catch the fruit and doing it successfully but-
He hit into the side of the table and shook the apple bowl at the end off it.
And the apples piled into a pyramid inside that towards the floor.