Chapter Twenty: Hate the Way You Love Me

Well I hate the way you see me

Like a man who can't be fixed

Like a fool fooling all but you

Who he really is

And I hate the way you hold me

Nervous as a cat

Like I might get the big idea

You'd forgive me just like that

I wouldn't have it any other way

Heaven knows a sinner needs a saint

Oh but when I've been at my most ugly

I hate the way you love me

– John Paul White (formerly of The Civil Wars), "Hate the Way You Love Me"

Heero looked from Relena to the interloper, registering the shock that flickered across both their faces. He wasn't sure what he'd just stumbled into, but whatever it was, he didn't like it.

Relena, seasoned politician that she was, quickly schooled her features. "Heero," she said smoothly, sounding friendlier toward him than she had in months. "You remember Dr. Paul Montgomery?"

A needless question; Relena knew full well he remembered Paul. Heero only wished he'd throttled him at that stupid gala last week, to avoid whatever this was.

"Of course," Heero said with exaggerated warmth that could only sound sarcastic, coming from him. "What brings you to our home?"

Relena looked like she was going to kill him. Heero fought back a chuckle.

"Paul… brought me soup," she said, holding up a brown paper bag.

"How thoughtful," Heero returned, sarcasm still cloaking his every word.

"I was just leaving," Paul said, giving Relena what appeared to be an apologetic smile. Then he held out his hand to Heero. "So nice to finally make your acquaintance." His eyes gleamed behind his spectacles, and Heero again found himself wanting to punch the man.

"The pleasure is all mine." Heero gripped Paul's hand in a firm shake, while unleashing his most sinister smile. A terrifying sight to behold, Relena had told him more than once. He caught her glaring at him out of the corner of his eye, and wouldn't have been surprised if she decided to lob the soup at his head.

So far this was more fun than Heero had expected. He continued to smile menacingly as Paul stepped awkwardly around him, ambling over the threshold and onto the front porch. The doctor mumbled a goodbye to Relena before darting down the steps. She smiled and waved after him, saying she'd see him Monday. Paul scurried off to the fancy car that was waiting for him in the stone driveway.

Heero continued smirking as he watched the car drive off. When he finally turned back to face Relena, she looked even more pissed off now that they no longer had an audience.

"Could you have been any ruder?" Her eyes flashed at him, like blue lightning.

Yes, yes he could have. Heero chuckled.

"What do you mean? I thought I was perfectly polite."

Relena rolled her eyes and turned her back to him. "Come inside before you catch cold. The last thing we need is both of us being sick right now."

"There's that smothering affection I missed," Heero deadpanned.

"Ha." Relena didn't look back at him as she headed for the kitchen. Heero shut and locked the door behind him, then followed after her. He found her at the island, removing a plastic, cylindrical container from the takeout bag. He set down the two bouquets of roses he'd bought while out and about with Duo this morning– and yes, his friend had teased him mercilessly at the time. Not that Heero cared. If flowers could soothe Relena's temper even a little, then it was well worth it.

Her gaze flicked to the roses. "Are those for me? Because you really shouldn't have."

"You and Ellie," Heero clarified. "I couldn't get flowers for just one of you."

"Yes, you could have. She'd appreciate it more."

Heero shrugged. "Pretend they're both for her, then."

"It's fine." Relena waved a hand. "You can put mine in the dining room." Heero wasn't sure, but he thought he saw the tiniest hint of a smile tugging at her lips.

"Roger that." Heero picked up the larger of the two bouquets – two dozen for Relena, and a dozen for Ellie; she was still a kid, after all – and headed for the sink. While he busied himself cutting the stems and trying not to make a huge mess of the kitchen, Relena walked over to the refrigerator with the container of soup in hand.

"What do you think you're doing with that?" Heero shot a glare in her direction.

"What?" she asked innocently, arching her brows.

Heero abandoned the roses and strode over to Relena, plucking the container out of her hands. Her eyes widened but he ignored her as he made his way to the trash can, which he opened up and dumped the container unceremoniously inside.

Relena's mouth dropped open. "Heero! You don't just throw away perfectly good soup!"

Heero returned to his work at the sink. "The last time you were with that guy, you wound up with food poisoning. Think I'd take any chances? Anyway, if you want soup, I'll get you some. Or better yet, make it myself."

Relena groaned and threw up her hands. "I let you back into the house for one day, and you're already in crazy-overprotective mode?!"

"I come home and find you letting random men into the house?" Heero shot back. "I think my reaction is valid."

Relena huffed and crossed her arms over her chest. "Yes, well, I didn't invite him here, just so you know. He stopped by of his own volition. And I told him I can't have any more visits like that, because of Ellie."

"You're gonna continue to date him, though?"

Relena began tapping one foot while continuing to glare at him. "I'm not dating him."

"You said something about seeing him on Monday."

"Yes, at work," she retorted hotly. "To meet about the project we're working on. Jealous much?"

"Of that guy?" Heero snorted. "Hardly."

He finished trimming the stems of the roses, then opened a nearby cabinet and pulled down Relena's favorite crystalline vase, which he filled with water and the plant food that came with the bouquet. He could feel Relena's eyes on his back as he placed the flowers in the vase.

"So. You wanted to discuss something," he said without turning around.

Silence. Heero turned around to find Relena still standing there with her arms still folded over her sweater, only now her eyes were glued to the floor. And her face had gone beet red.

"It's nothing," she muttered. Her eyes looked like they could burn holes into the tiles.

Heero arched a brow, wondering what he'd said to illicit that reaction. "You sure?"

"Forget it." Relena's gaze snapped up to his. "I'm no longer in the mood."

Heero's interest was immediately piqued. "In the mood for what?"

Relena's head tipped to the side, one brow sliding up in a look of pure exasperation. Heero knew that look well; it meant he was supposed to read her mind.

He preferred the direct approach. "Just tell me what you want, Relena." When she again didn't answer him, he chanced a step toward her. "You're the one who asked me to come home early. So what did you want to talk about?"

Relena heaved another sigh. "I don't want to talk any more. I'm tired of talking."

"What do you want to do, then?" Heero only prayed that she wouldn't try to kick him out again. After all this time he'd waited to see Ellie… that would not be acceptable.

But as Relena raised her eyes to meet his once again, she looked more vulnerable than Heero was expecting. He took in her pink-tinged cheeks and luminous blue eyes gleaming up at him; they had a sheen to them, like they were about to fill with tears. A thousand emotions seemed to cross over Relena's face, all at once. Heero's chest constricted. He was hesitant to approach her, not knowing what would happen if he were to close the distance between them. She looked like she might kiss him, or slap him. Maybe both. Hell, at this point he'd take either.

He came to stand right before her, and suddenly they were closer than they'd been in a while. She tilted her face to look up at him, her ocean-colored eyes swimming. Heero resisted the urge to brush his fingers against her cheek, forcing himself to remain perfectly still. Her throat bobbed as she opened her mouth to speak, her eyes holding his hostage all the while.

"Heero…"

He swallowed around a lump that formed in his throat out of nowhere. "Relena…"

Commotion at the front door cut off his words. They broke away from one another abruptly and turned toward the noise. There were only a handful of people who had the codes to the front gate and door. Which meant…

"Ellie's home," Relena said softly. She glanced back up at Heero briefly before turning and exiting the kitchen.

Heero followed after Relena, his heart hammering in his chest.

They reentered the foyer, where Zechs and Ellie stood shaking snow off their coats. Heero's brother-in-law was tall and imposing as ever in his dark trench coat. His silver gaze immediately slid to Heero's, and Heero automatically braced himself for a confrontation. Their eyes met only briefly before Zechs turned toward Relena, who was coming over to greet him. Ellie, meanwhile, had busied herself with unfastening the toggles on her pink winter coat, her back to Heero. He paused and waited for her to turn around, and couldn't stop the grin spreading across his face.

Relena shot Heero a smile over her shoulder before she bent down to Ellie and tugged on her coat.

"Hey, Ella-bella," she teased warmly. "Look who's home…"

Ellie's head snapped up. First, she looked over at the duffel bag Heero had left sitting in the foyer. Then she whirled around, stopping short when she saw Heero. Her blue eyes bulged, and she shrieked.

"Daddy!?"

Heero began to cross the room, but Ellie was already on the move. She broke away from Relena and launched herself into Heero's arms. Heero caught her and spun her around. Ellie let out a joyful peal of laughter. But then when Heero stopped spinning her and scooped her into a fierce hug, she began to cry.

And when the tears welled up in his own eyes, Heero didn't fight them. Any shame he might have once felt over such a candid display of emotion had long ago evaporated.

So Heero let the tears fall, and held his baby girl like he would never let go.

Relena was having a hard time holding back her own tears as she watched Heero with Ellie. She reached up to dab at her eyes while she stood next to her brother, her heart twisting. She felt really, really guilty for keeping father and daughter apart for so long. She wished now that she could take it all back, the weeks of pain and heartache she'd put them all through. It wasn't worth it, and she realized how selfish she'd been. She'd let her fears take over and make her into the worst possible version of herself. She vowed then and there to never let that happen again, no matter what.

Relena turned misty eyes up to her brother, whose face was unreadable. He slipped an arm around her shoulders and guided her into the kitchen.

Once they were alone, Milliardo released her. "Are you sure you're all right, having him here?" He jerked his head in the direction of the foyer.

"Yes, I'm sure." Relena laid a hand on her brother's arm, doing her best to smile reassuringly at him. "We'll be fine, thank you."

His silver eyes glinted. "Well, if you have any problems, you know where to find me."

"Of course." Relena gave his arm a squeeze. "I really appreciate everything you and Lu have done already. Please thank her again for me."

Milliardo nodded, his gaze straying back to the foyer. "He seems…" His voice trailed off.

"What?" Relena asked, following her brother's gaze.

"Different than I expected."

She frowned. "Different how?"

Her brother shrugged. "Or maybe it's me. I figured I'd feel like pummeling him the moment I saw him again. Teach him a lesson." He turned back toward Relena and smiled faintly. "Guess I'll let the bastard be, for now."

Relena rolled her eyes. "You don't need to teach Heero a lesson, Milliardo. He's been through enough already."

"So have you. And I can't help but want to make him pay for it."

"Well, I already have, so you can save the overprotective big brother act for another time." Relena patted his shoulder.

Her brother loosed a chuckle. "Fine. I'm not going to insert myself where I'm not wanted. But if he crosses the line again..." He tightened his right hand into a fist.

"Let it go, Mill," Relena sighed. "Please."

Milliardo looked like he was waging his own inner battle, but he nodded. "If you insist."

Her brother left, and Relena found Ellie still clinging to Heero. When Relena approached, Ellie released one arm to hug Relena's legs. Relena laughed and bent down to ruffle her daughter's hair.

"Were you surprised, Ellie?"

Her little girl sniffled and nodded. Relena laughed again and kneeled down to pull Ellie into a tight hug. Which brought Relena in very close proximity to Heero, who was still crouched on the floor, both of his arms around their daughter. Heero loosened one arm and snaked it around Relena's waist, drawing her close. Relena didn't offer up any resistance, and realized she didn't want to. She kept one arm wrapped around Ellie and draped the other around Heero's neck, burying her face into his shoulder. Heero began to rub her back in slow circles, and fresh tears brimmed in Relena's eyes.

And as she hugged her daughter and husband, Relena thought she could feel the pieces of her broken heart starting to mend.

A/N: Well friends, I'm about ready to wrap up this story pretty soon and turn my attention to other things...there are at least a few chapters left, though, so be on the lookout! This month I'm participating in the resurrected Church of Lemons, which, if you follow me, you have probably already noticed. :D My first contribution posted the other day, and it's a 3xR (with hints of 1xR) that I'm particularly proud of, because the story itself is different from anything I have ever written. So, even if 3xR isn't your cup of tea, I do hope you will give it a chance and can enjoy it for what it is!

For those of you hardcore 1xR shippers, this Saturday, Feb. 8th, I will be posting a 1xR one-shot for CoL; however, it's too explicit to share on this site, so it's going to be exclusive to AO3. My pen name there is RelenaForPresident, so I do hope you'll hop over there and check it out! The story is titled, most appropriately, "Dark Side," so look for that this weekend!

In the meantime, happy hump day! I hope you're having a great week and a wonderful February so far.

Love love love,

- RFP