"How long do we have before the orcs reach us?" Dáin asked.

"Three days." Harry answered. "You and your dwarves should get here late tonight, that will give them two days to rest, prepare and be briefed. We estimate that the force from Dol Guldur should arrive first, likely early morning, the force from Gundabad will be a few hours behind them. Thorin and Severus believe that this is deliberate, the intention being to let us get into the battle and then overwhelm us from two different directions."

"But as you know this, it won't be a surprise and won't have the effect that the orc leaders are hoping for." Dáin nodded approvingly.

"Exactly." Harry grinned.

"Well, done." He thumped Harry on the shoulder and stomped off towards Colin. "Let's get back to my lads, before they think I've abandoned them." He settled on the carpet and nodded to Colin. "When you're ready, Master Colin."

"See ya later, Harry." Colin waved and the carpet rose into the air and began its journey east.

Harry became aware of the blankness around him, first. Then there was a waft of air that brought with it a faint smell of fires and cauldrons and potions, mixed with the sharp scent of Alihotsy and bloodroot. That meant one place.

Hospital wing.

Again...

Slowly, other things began to make their presence felt. The scrape of stone against wood, that could be a chair being moved, but being followed by the tiny crunch of rocks breaking? That meant chess, wizarding chess. Then he could hear quietly mutter conversations, that was… Bill and Charlie, then there was Mione and McGonagall and was that Remus and Sirius…? But the Veil? Didn't Sirius…?

He focused on that so hard, that the memories opening in his mind, startled him. Memories of duels, lessons, pensieves, caves, killing curses, towers, camping, running, elves, horcruxes, battles and courtrooms, filled his mind. Closely followed by meetings, with Hermione, with Kingsley, the Unspeakables, daily meetings with McGonagall and shifting into Longfang, over and over, again. Training and the gauntlet. Saying goodbye to his friends, the family of his heart and walking into the Veil. Beorn with his ponies and animals, Hermione and his trunk and all the people she's hidden in it, Thorin and his Company.

And Sirius… Sirius was alive!

Something else nudged at his mind. He let out an inadvertent snicker.

Sirius was knocked up. Pregnant. Oh, how dad would be laughing his ass off.

"He's awake." Fleur said.

"Not quite." Hermione objected. "But almost, give him a few more minutes."

"I'll fetch Sissy." Fleur said.

Sounds continued and Harry continued to process them, letting his mind sort them into things he could understand.

"Let's see how he's going, shall we?" Narcissa's gentle voice floated down from above him as she began to cast her medical scans over him. "I agree with Hermione, he's not quite awake, yet. But given how hard he came down, it could take more than a few minutes. He's got quite the concussion, it's going to scramble his senses for a few days. Magic can do a lot to repair the damage, but not even magic can repair it, instantly. He will progressively improve."

Harry grunted his disagreement.

"That's not how Harry works, Miss Sissy." Hermione corrected the healer, from somewhere off to Harry's left.

"No?" Sissy asked.

"Oh, no, not Harry. Once he wakes up, which should be in about… half a minute… he'll be back on his feet inside the hour. He was unconscious for approximately forty-eight hours, that means that he'll only take an hour or two and he'll be pretty much back to normal." She paused. "Normal for him, anyway."

"I don't-"

"It's something to do with having phoenix tears in his blood, Madam Pomfrey theorised. He recovers fast, once he wakes up, even broken bones. Skele-gro is supposed to take twenty-four hours to regrow bones, but Harry takes less than a third of that. He-"

"Not phoenix tears." Harry grunted. "Lockhart was before basilisk. Croaker said, more to do with magical strength." He forced his eyes open. "Hey…"

"Harry!" Headley and Charlie both cried out and darted across the room, coming to a halt and falling to heir knees, one on each side of his stretcher.

"Oh, Harry…" Headley started to cry, his shoulders hunching and shaking.

"Harry…" Charlie reached for Harry's hand, his fingers grasping the battered digits gently. "If you scare me like that again, I'll let Sirius lock you up, like he threatened to do after the Umbridge thing."

"Nooo…" Harry whined, curling closer Charlie's side. "No, don't let him, no…"

"Harry, you dive bombed their communications tower." Charlie replied. "You knew that they had backup coming and you knew that we were coming to back you up, but you went ahead anyway. No, no more. No more risking your life, unnecessarily. Do you want our children to grow up with only one parent?" Charlie's voice was quiet but very firm. "No more, Harry."

Harry's eyes opened wide and the expression on his face could only be called stunned.

"Before you hand him over to Sirius, let me finish up my scans." Narcissa's lips twitched, but she managed to withhold her smile… just.

"How did we go?" Harry asked. "Is anyone else hurt? Did we lose anyone?" He looked for Hermione for answers, finding her on a bed, two over to his left.

"The landmines performed as expected." Hermione smiled grimly. "Very few orcs managed to ignore the results, some did, but they numbered in the hundreds, not thousands. The archers cut those numbers down further and the ground warriors took care of the rest. We lost fourteen dwarves from the Iron Hills, two elves from those that King Thranduil sent with Jessian and Lendalen. Dwalin, Balin, Fíli, Kíli, Thorin and Tauriel were injured, most of them not severely but Miss Sissy and Fleur are still working on them. Thorin's got the worst of it, a sword through the upper chest, damn good thing that Severus and Sirius were close by, Sirius managed to boost Severus as he dropped Thorin into stasis and place him under a disillusionment charm. They sent a Patronus to Miss Sissy, who called Justin to go and fetch him as soon as it was safe, before they went on to finished off the orcs in that area. That's about when you did your kamikaze stunt."

"Is he going to be alright?" Harry had come to like the stubborn dwarf and counted him as a good friend.

"He's still under stasis, Miss Sissy wants her, Fleur and Sirius rested and ready, before they remove the charm. Then they plan to use the de-aging potion, Sissy thinks it's the only real chance for him. That raises another issue… If it works, Severus feels that it's going to react differently for him than it does for humans. Severus, if you would explain, please?" Hermione looked to the potions Master, who was leaning against a wall, his body language exposing exactly how tired he was.

"Of course, Mrs Malfoy." It was said quietly. "In humans, the de-aging potion reverses their body's aging, giving them back the years that were taken from them. In my experiments using the potion on Thorin's dwarves, if doesn't quite work the same on them. Yes, it repairs the damage their bodies have received over a certain number of years, but it doesn't extend their lives by those years, as it does in humans." He sighed, again. "Their bodies will repair the injuries, but they won't be de-aged like humans would be."

"But… if it works, he'll be healed?" Harry asked, his eyes begging for a positive response.

"If it works, yes." Severus nodded.

"How long will it take to know?" Harry asked.

"We should have a clear response within a couple of minutes." The potions Master replied. "His injuries are visible, if we see them repairing, we know that it's working."

"But I refuse to take the risk before Fíli and Kíli are awake, they deserve the chance to say goodbye, if the potion doesn't work." Narcissa warned. "And both are currently heavily sedated."

"And I have had an idea on how to modify the potion, it may increase the potency for non-humans." Severus added.

"But he's under stasis? That worked? He won't get any worse?" Harry asked.

"The charm is holding fine." Miss Sissy assured him.

"Okay…" Harry lay back, linking his fingers through Charlie and Headley's. "So…? The battle briefing…? Who's going to present that?"

"Hermione's got that." Charlie huffed. "She seems to know what you want to know, before you even ask."

"That's Mione. She knows me better than I know myself, always has." Harry gave a broken laugh.

"Of course, she does." Charlie shook his head. "She's been there through everything, she knows exactly what sort of rubbish you get up to."

"And usually, she's right there beside me." Harry grinned.

"Well, not today, me bucko." Bill said as he ambled across the… was it a room or a Hall(?), with most of their allies behind him. "Fleur's just given her a phial of Dreamless Sleep. She suggested that each of us give you a quick run through and she can give you a more detailed briefing tomorrow."

"That would be brilliant, Bill." Harry grinned and nodded, accepting a mug of soup from an amused Remus, while a fussing Sirius fluffed around behind Harry, trying to put extra pillows behind him. Charlie snorted, tossed the pillows away and put himself behind the younger wizard, earning himself a pouting glare from Sirius. "Who's first?"

"Me." Headley grinned. "I saw a pair of orcs have their clothes turn into something from a Victoria's Secret Catalogue, complete with wings and their weapons turned into a muggle kid's fairy wand, with ribbons."

"I watched some have theirs turn into bad drag queen costumes, feather boas and all." Seamus laughed.

"Most of ours just had their turn into swimwear." Padma stood with Parvati and Lavender.

"Yeah, ours had theirs turn into lingerie." Remus nodded.

"Ours got covered in foam, I mean, their armour turned to foam." Colin added.

"A whole group of them had their weapons turn into rubber chickens." Dennis bounced beside his brother.

"Fred and George added something to our section." Lavender fake-glared at the twins. "All their boots turned to thigh-high stiletto boots and their weapons into band-leader's batons."

"A lot were shrunk and, unfortunately, not all of those were found." Snape added. "Although… I did see Mrs Malfoy shrink and summon a giant, I do believe that she gave it to Smaug as a chew toy."

"She did." Draco snorted. "And she was most put out when Smaug proceeded to keep it as a pet. Charlie insisted he wash it and made the beast little clothes, so the blasted thing can stay with him, he's been sleeping with the bloody thing, like it's a plushie toy."

"There were also a heap that had their boots turn into roller-skates." George grinned.

"And some that ended up wearing lace corsets and nightgowns." Fred waggled his eyebrows.

"Most weapons turned into pool noodles or rubber versions." Justin was biting his lips in an effort not to laugh.

"Some turned into kids' plastic ones." Natalie laughed.

"And they didn't know how to deal with fireworks or the twins' explosives. Near the end, any time one went off, an orc nearly cried." Neville smiled in remembered bliss. "It made it so easy to pick them off."

"Frank hit a small pack of wargs with the shrinking potion, but it must have reacted badly with their system." Alice added. "It just de-aged them. Now, he's got a pack of warg puppies, that think he's their daddy, following him around." She jerked her thumb over her shoulder and when he looked, Harry saw a carpet holding half a dozen huge puppies, floating in the corridor.

"Dáin's dwarves had grand time." Balin added. "It's not often they're allowed free rein like that."

"Aye, they did." Dáin agreed. "Your people fought well, better than I thought they would."

"Always the tone of surprise." Harry sighed.

"What? Did I sound surprised?" Dáin frowned.

"No." Harry shook his head. "It's a standing joke between Hermione, me and a friend that we had to leave behind. One of us said it every time someone admitted they didn't know something." A look of sadness flittered across his face before he forced it away.

"Ah… In that case, yes. I admit it, I was surprised at how well they fought and how few injuries they gained." Dáin allowed.

"Magicals tend to be a little more… robust… than non-magicals." Sissy replied.

"Well, you're going to have trouble with some of them." Dáin held up a hand when Harry went to object. "Wait a bit. The trouble's not so much with them, but… My second Cohort have decided that they want to keep a couple of your lads."

"Oh…" Harry exclaimed.

"Aye. And the leader of my Seventh Cohort wants to Court one of your ladies." Dáin warned.

"Oh, Merlin…" Harry buried his face in his hands.

"And who would that be?" Balin asked.

"Lady Parvati, Balin." Dáin answered. "My son, Thorin Stonehelm. He's enamoured with the way she dealt with a few of the rowdier lads."

"Oh, boy…" Harry knew Parvati's temper rivalled his. "What did she do?"

"She silenced them." Dáin laughed. "She silenced them, stuck them to their seats and proceeded to ignore them and any request to release them. Then, the next morning, she made sure that they went without your headache potion and charmed little bands of instruments to followed them around, clashing and ringing their little clangers off. By lunchtime, the lads were truly sorry, begging for help but she reminded them that they liked that level of noise the night before. My Thorin was most impressed. He asked me to inquire if she was betrothed and if not, would she consider his suite?"

"Ooh, that's going to be a problem…" Ori gasped.

"Why?" Dáin asked.

"Ah, well…" Balin was the one to reply. "Thorin and Draco have already reached an agreement. Lady Parvati suggested and it was agreed upon, that they would wait until we had dealt with the orcs before a contract would be signed."

"Lady Parvati? She was involved?" Dáin asked.

"Aye. It t'was she and Fíli that Thorin and Draco in regard to the matter." Balin.

"Is she genuinely interested in Fíli, do you think? Or would my Thorin stand a chance?" Dáin asked.

"Parvati's genuine." Harry growled. "That girl doesn't have a deceitful bone in her whole body, not one. If she says she's interested in someone, then she's interested in them. The fact that she's prepared to admit it, shows just how much she's come to trust Fíli."

"Why? What happened to cause a lack of trust?" Dáin asked.

"I told you about the girls and how they came to be with us?" Harry asked and when Dáin nodded, he went on. "Well, Parvati and a few others were attacked by a… well, let's just call him a monster. He wasn't an orc like Azog, but he was the closest that our world had. Greyback hunted innocents for the joy of hearing them scream or beg for death. Remus was the one to take him out, almost cost him his own life to do it, though. But Parvati was hurt. Not just physically, but also emotionally. And her family's reaction didn't help."

"For her to acknowledge her interest in Fíli?" Sissy entered the conversation. "That's a huge step for her, we honestly thought that she was going to become an emotional recluse."

"So, my Thorin's really not got a chance, then." It wasn't a question.

"No, no chance."

"Well, damn."

"However…?" Balin drawled.

"However…?" Dáin frowned.

"I can tell you that it wasn't Lady Parvati that hexed your men, it was Lady Padma." Balin smirked.

"And how can you be certain of that?" Dáin's frown grew darker.

"Parvati hasn't left Fíli' bedside since the battle. Padma's the only one that's been out of the infirmary." Balin replied innocently.

"But…" Dáin blustered. "My Thorin said…"

"And how would he know? Padma and Parvati are twins, Dáin." Balin chided.

"Twins? Oh, dear… that complicates things." Dáin grimaced.

"Indeed." Balin sighed.

"Ah…? For those of us that don't know dwarfish culture, what does that mean?" Remus asked.

"Ah, right, yes. Well… Twins aren't separated. They might marry different people, but they live either in the same household or within yards of each other." Balin explained.

"And Parvati and I have already decided that's how it's going to be for us, too." Padma's voice cut in. "Greyback's tried to split us up once, no-one else is going to get the chance. When Draco and Thorin sign a contract for Fíli and Parvati, Severus and Draco are going to sign one for Justin and I. And Justin has signed on to be Fíli's magical tutor for the next few years." There was no doubt in her voice, it was filled with certainty.

"I see." Dáin sighed. "Pity. I should have liked to have had a strong daughter-in-law. More chance of children, if a dwarf's got a strong wife."

"I don't think your Thorin could cope with a wife as strong as these ladies, Dáin." Balin told Dáin. "Young Thorin's not the most… confident of dwarves, a strong wife might be too much for him."

"You could be right, you could be right." Dáin nodded. "But how else do I get grandchildren? Our birth-rates are so low, only strong dams have children as it is."

"There? We might be able to help you." Sissy said. "I'd have to scan a few of your… dams, just to be certain, but there is a chance."

"Any help would be greatly appreciated." Balin replied and Dáin echoed him.