Hi guys,
after watching that idiotic mess of a promo I needed some writing therapy and came up with this. I hope you'll enjoy reading it.
Miss Eliza
„Ladies and Gentleman welcome to Chicago. Please remain seated until the aircraft has reached its parking position." Gabriela Dawson was anxious to get out of the plane. It had not been a very long flight but her feet were swollen and she really needed to pee. Maybe she should have listened to Antonio. Her brother had told her not to go back to Chicago yet, but to take some time to think about everything. In fact, there was not much to think about. She was on a mission and when Gabriela Dawson was on a mission no one could stop her, not even her brother. The people in the aircraft finally started moving and Gabby opened the overhead compartment to get her carry-on luggage and got in line with the other passengers. It took her some time to get out and as soon as she arrived in the airport terminal, she looked for the nearest bathroom. When she finally found it, she sighed in relief. Two minutes later she felt much better but still anxious. This would not be easy but she had to do it. There was no other way, even if Antonio wanted to make her believe there was. Of course, the conveyor belt for her flight was miles out, the last one in a long row. Baggage trolleys were lined up next to her like little soldiers waiting for the battle to start. She took one of them and started walking towards the conveyor belt. It felt good to walk after the flight. If only her suitcases were not that heavy. Antonio had helped her with them in San Juan but now she was on her own. She looked around, maybe there was someone who could help her lifting the heavy suitcases from the belt. A noise interrupted her thoughts. Suitcases started dropping out of the hole in the wall. She really needed help, there was no way she could lift her suitcases and her brother had warned her this would happen. Her annoying big brother, who of course had been right but she was Gabby Dawson and Gabby Dawson never backed down from a mission not even if it meant… she forbid herself think about what she was going to do. Too afraid she would not find the courage to do it. She spotted her suitcases and looked around for someone to help her. "Sir?" She asked the man next to her. "I can't lift my heavy suitcases from the conveyor belt. I need some help." The man turned around, he looked like he was in his early forties. "Oh of course, which ones are yours?"
She pointed at two big brown suitcases with black zippers. "Those two." The man nodded and put both of them on her trolley. "Thank you very much." Gabby said, but he was already gone, she saw him reaching out for a small pink suitcase with a princess print on it. Probably his daughter's. "Alright, let's do this. I got this." Gabby mumbled to herself and started pushing the trolley towards the exit. It was really heavy. Why the hell did she have to bring all her stuff back to Chicago at once? She really should have listened to Antonio. Finally, she made it through the green exit, she had nothing to declare. Well, at least nothing custom related. There were taxis lined up outside the terminal and Gabby pushed the heavy trolley to the one in front. The driver got out and helped her put the suitcases into the trunk. He looked at her. "You really shouldn't be doing this." He closed the trunk. "Where do you want to go?" She told him the address of the apartment she had rented. It belonged to one of the nurses from her camp. She had offered her to take it until she found a permanent place. "'I know where that is. Nice residential area." The driver opened the door for her and Gabby got into the car. It was early afternoon in Chicago and traffic was not as crazy as during rush hour. It didn't take very long to get to the apartment. Gabby was lost in her thoughts. She tried her best not to panic. Her hands were shaking slightly. "You okay?" The driver stopped the engine and got out of the car to open her door. "Yeah, I'm alright. Just a little bit tired." "Understandable." He placed her suitcases on the sidewalk. "Is there a lift in the building?"
"I have no idea." Gabby shrugged. "I'll be fine", she assured him and gave him some dollar notes. "Okay, have a nice day" He got into his car and drove away, leaving her on the sidewalk in front of her new temporarily home. The keys were in her purse and Gabby took them out to open the front door. Dragging the suitcases in, she saw a lift. Maybe her life was not a complete mess after all. Maybe this was a silver lining. Susan, the nurse back in San Juan, had told her the apartment was on the 3rd floor. Her fingers pressed the cold metal button and she waited for the doors to close. Slowly the lift started to descend. It felt like an eternity but finally the doors opened on the 3rd floor. Once again, she had to drag the damn suitcases out of the lift and into the apartment. Number 308, Susan had told her. There it was, right down the hallway. This time it was easier to move the suitcases since they had wheels attached, she could roll them. Gabby unlocked the door and looked around. It was a nice one-bedroom apartment with an open living room and kitchen area. Everything was kept in white, grey and a light pink the bedroom was small but cozy with a white queen size bed and a walk-in wardrobe. There was a door leading to the adjoining bathroom. The center of the living room area was a dark grey couch with a TV in front of it. On the other side of the room were large French doors leading to a small balcony. The room was L-shaped, with a white kitchen around the corner on the shorter end. Gabby decided that she liked the place and wrote a quick text to Susan thanking her once again for letting her live here. She also sent a short message to her brother, telling him she had arrived in Chicago and was still alive. He immediately called her.
"Hey, big brother"
"Hey, sis. Everything alright?"
"Yeah I just arrived at the apartment, I'll get freshened up and take Susan's car to drive to his place."
"You really sure about that?"
"Antonio, we have talked about this. I have to do it. There's no other way. I already waited too long."
"You did not. You couldn't get out of here because of the earthquake and you couldn't tell him on the phone because there was no reception for at least two months."
"I know, but now I have to do right by him. He deserves it."
"Sure. Tell him I said hi and if you happen to see Sylvie tell her I said hi too."
"Will do. I have to go now. I'll call you later."
They said their goodbyes and Gabby hung up. After taking a shower she got dressed in fresh clothes and took the car keys from the small table next to the front door. The car was parked right in front of the building. Susan had called her sister to bring it here and Gabby was very thankful for that. It meant she didn't have to buy a new car right away. She got behind the wheel and started driving to his place, but when she was halfway there she got cold feet. This was not as easy as it had seemed. At the next crossing she turned left and stopped the car in front of a supermarket. Gabby decided she needed a friend first. She typed the new address in the GPS of the car and followed the instructions. There was a parking space right around the corner and she parked the car and started walking towards the old building with the number 902 painted on its front door. What she did not see was the silver truck standing on the other side of the street. Right opposite the building. She was too focused on her thoughts. This whole situation was complicated but she was sure Sylvie would be able to calm her down. She had talked to her two weeks before and she had told her the new address and to come by next time she was in Chicago. Well here she was. In desperate need of her friend. Gabby chuckled slightly. This was so not her. Usually Sylvie was the one asking her for help but this time it was different. If she had not been so lost in her thoughts, she would have seen the blonde guy entering the building. But she did not. Not until she opened the front door of the building and walked into the hallway, took the stairs to the first floor and watched the unimaginable happen. Matt was standing right there. Right in front of Sylvie's apartment door. They talked about something and at first it looked friendly. Gabby could see both of their faces from where she was standing at the top of the stairs. But then she heard Sylvie say "It had always been you." Matt had turned his head, she couldn't see his face, it all happened so fast. Before she knew what was going on they were kissing. Right there. Right in front of her. It felt like someone was pulling the rug out from under her feet. Like a knife being stabbed right into her heart and twisted around. Quickly she hid in another entrance to make sure they did not see her. It was hard not to cry, unimaginable hard. But Gabby managed to. She waited until the door closed behind them, ran down the stairs, back into her car and that was when she broke down. Tears were running down her face, sobs escaped her mouth uncontrollably. It was hard to breath, her chest felt tight and her whole body hurt. She tried to compose herself but there was no composing yourself after watching your best friend kiss the love of your life. There was no composing yourself when you felt betrayed and stabbed in the back. There was no composing yourself when you just lost everything you ever believed in. She cried for almost half an hour and still was not able to calm down enough to drive back to her apartment. Reaching blindly into her purse she got her phone out and dialed a familiar number. "Hey Dawson, how are you?"
Nothing. She could not speak. It was too hard.
"Dawson, are you okay? Dawson? Are you crying?"
Sobbing was the answer.
"Where are you? Are you in Chicago?"
"Yes" Was all she managed to say without crying. Then after a 5 second break she added: "In front of Brett's place." That was all she needed to say.
"Stay where you are. I'll come and get you. Don't drive, you hear me?"
"Yes, I…I'll wait." She still could not control the sobbing. Gabby ended the call and buried her face in her hands. Tears fell through her fingers and left wet spots on her jeans. What the hell had just happened? Maybe this was just a bad dream and all she needed to do was waking up. Unfortunately, it was not. It was real and it sure felt real. Her whole body was in pain, even her skin seemed to burn. After what felt like an eternity someone knocked at the window of her door. "Unlock the door, Gabby." She did and then she was in his arms. A sobbing mess. Pain written all over her face. It broke Kelly's heart to see one of his best friends in the world like this. He knew there was no point in asking her what had happened. Not now. Not here. She did not look like she was able to walk, so he lifted her up and carried her to his car. When he put her down and fastened the seatbelt, he noticed something. But once again he decided not to say anything. Now was not the time. Since he was slightly aware of what was going on between Casey and Brett, he knew what she must have witnessed and it made him wanting to kill the idiot. How could he do this to her? Hell, how could both of them do this to her?! Kelly was aware of the fact that he could not take her to his place, he was living with that bastard after all. He looked at the heartbroken woman in his passenger seat. "Do you have a place to stay?" She nodded. "Can you tell me the address?" She did and Kelly started the car. During the drive to her place she never stopped sobbing, a few times it seemed like she calmed down a little bit only to take a deep breath and start crying again. Finally he found the right building, parked the car and helped her out.
"Can you walk?"
"I think so." She was weak from all the crying and probably from all the pain she felt in her heart. He put an arm around her and walked her into the building. "Which floor do you live on?" "Third. Apartment 308." They got into the lift and she managed to walk to her apartment door but her hands were shaking and she could not open it. Without saying a word, Kelly took the keys and unlocked the door. Gabby walked in, threw herself on the couch and broke down again. This time he knew he had to say something. He had to talk to her, he needed to know what had happened. If he needed to kill Casey or just punch him. Carefully he sat down next to her and stroked her back. She looked up and he took her in his arms, trying to comfort her. "Can you tell me what happened?"
"I wanted to see him and then I got cold feet and decided to drive to Sylvie's and when I walked up the stairs I saw Matt standing in front of her door. I heard her say…I…I…she…." Gabby started crying again. He shushed her. "She said "It has always been you" and then they…they kissed and they closed the door." Okay, he definitely needed to kill the idiot.
"I'm so sorry, Dawson. I'm so sorry you had to see that."
"Why?" She looked at him with her teary Bambi eyes and it broke is heart once again. "Why did they do this to me? What did I do to deserve this?"
"Nothing. You didn't do anything to deserve this, Gabby."
"She…" Sobbing. "She said it had always been him, what does that mean? Where they doing it the whole time I was away? Was she in love with him all those years? Did they do it behind my back when I was still in Chicago?"
"Of course, not and you know that. It must have happened recently. I was not even aware he was about to make a move. I told him not to do it."
"Thank you, Kelly Severide, you are a good friend." She seemed calmer now. Maybe this was the right moment to ask her.
"Dawson?"
"Yeah?" She lifted her head from his shoulder.
"Why did you come back?" He gestured towards the suitcases, which were still standing next to the bedroom door. "Did you come back for good?"
"I thought so. But now I don't know. Antonio is in San Juan, mom lives in Florida now and dad just bought a house there too. There is no one left here."
"I am still here."
She smiled at him. "And I'm very thankful for that but you can't help me with this." She looked down at her stomach. "Thank you for not mentioning it earlier."
"You're welcome." He looked at her. "When did this happen? Five months ago, when Casey took furlough and went to see you?"
She nodded. "He told you that?"
"No, he didn't but I'm not an idiot."
"No, you're not."
"So, you're five months along?"
"Yeah and I couldn't come earlier or even call because of the big earthquake."
"So, you took the first chance you got to tell him in person, because this is not something you want to tell someone on the phone, but when you went to see him you got cold feet, drove to Brett's instead and saw them?"
"Yeah" Tears threatened to fall down again. "I felt like I needed my BFF." A single tear rolled down her cheek. "Why? Why did they do this to me?" For what felt like the umpteenth time she started sobbing uncontrollably.
"Gabby, you need to stop crying, please. This is not good for you or the baby. Please try to calm down a little bit. I'm worried about both of you." But she didn't.
"Gabby, please. They're not worth it. Don't risk your or the baby's health because of them." He reached for the phone in his pocket and hit speed dial.
"Hey Kelly, where are you? Did you notice that Casey didn't come home last night? He must have stayed at Brett's. Good for him." Stella laughed. "He went there again after shift …"
"Stop it" Kelly told her. Gabby's head still was on his shoulder and he knew she had heard Stella. "What's that noise? Where are you? Is someone crying?"
"I am at Dawson's new place. It's her. She saw them."
"Oh my God, I'll be over there in a minute. Text me the address."
That made Gabby lifting her head and taking the phone from Kelly. "Stay where you are. I don't want to see you. You knew about all of this and you didn't think of telling me?! Did everyone forget about my existence? Am I of that little value to all of you?" Gabby sounded desperate and Stella didn't know what to say.
"I'm sorry, Gabby. But I didn't feel like it was my place to tell you."
"You just said you were happy for him."
Before any of them could say something, they would regret, Kelly took the phone from Gabby. "Stella? Let's talks about all this later and don't tell Casey. I will tell him."
"Yeah sure, call me if you need anything. She knows I'm not really a fan of Brett and Casey, right?"
"I'm sure she does." He ended the call and looked at the picture of misery in his arms. "You know it's not Stella's fault, right? She's not happy for them. In fact, she doesn't like the idea. She was joking."
"You sure about that?" Kelly nodded.
"Text her to come over here and bring burgers and fries from Small Cheval." Kelly did as he was told. He was happy, Gabby seemed willingly to eat something and maybe he could convince her to drink something too. "You want to drink something? Maybe water?"
"Sounds good, too bad I can't have a whiskey. I feel like downing a whole bottle."
"Totally understandable but I can`t let you do that." Kelly went into the kitchen and came back with a glass of water.
Gabby sighed. "I still have to do the right thing and tell him, right? Because I feel like running away and never coming back."
"That is not an option. He might not deserve it but your baby deserves to know who their father is. Don't take it away from them."
"Him" Gabby smiled. "It's a boy."
"Wow" Kelly had the biggest grin on his face. "That's wonderful. I'm so happy for you."
"Thank you, Kelly. I really appreciate you being here." She sighed. "I should have called."
"That wouldn't have changed anything." He rubbed her arm.
"You sure about that?" Gabby felt numb but at least she was finally able to stop crying. "Because I am not."
"I don't know." He really did not. He just did not see it coming and he swore to God he would tell Brett and Casey off. Kelly Severide might have had his fair share of women but he never broke the code and Sylvie and Matt definitely did. "But I do know that the Matt Casey I know is a decent guy."
"The Matt Casey I know would never do something like this to me." She looked completely crushed. "He would never even think of it."
There was a knock on the door before Kelly could say something, he got up and opened it. "Where's my girl?" Stella gave the food she brought to her boyfriend, dumped two duffel bags on the floor and stormed into the living room, she saw Gabby sitting on the couch. Her face was pale, her eyes still red from all the crying and she looked like a shadow of her former self. She sat down next to her and gave her a hug. "I'm sorry. I made a stupid joke. I would never be the cheerleader of the whitest couple ever."
"I'm sorry, too." Gabby leaned her head against Stella's shoulder. "But I can blame the hormones." She knew there was no point in trying to hide her pregnancy. It was too obvious, Stella only had not seen it yet because she was sitting and her sweater was wide.
"Oh my God!" Stella was shocked. "When did this… wait… five months ago. When Casey went to see you?"
"Yep"
"And you never said a word, because…"
"I couldn't. There was this earthquake and no cell phone reception and the landline was gone. Plus, I didn't want to tell him about our baby boy on the phone. I came here as soon as I could. But apparently not soon enough." The new reality hit Gabby again and she sobbed violently. Kelly came back from the kitchen with three plates of food in his hands. He placed them on the coffee table. "Dawson, we agreed on no more crying." Sitting down next to her he took her in his arms once again. Stella did her best to comfort Gabby too. She was more or less trapped in a bear hug in-between her friends. It took them five minutes to calm her down. "I'm sorry, Kelly. I can't help it."
"I know, but you need to eat something." He reached for a plate and gave it to her. They ate their meal in silence. None of them dared to speak, afraid it would cause Gabby to start crying again. When they had finished their meal, Stella's phone started vibrating in her pocket. She took it out and saw the name flashing Matt Casey. She looked apologetically at Gabby. "I have to take it." She went into the bedroom and pressed the accept button. "Hey, Casey"
"Hey Kidd, where are you guys, I thought we could have dinner together?"
"I'm sorry Casey, but we can't. We won't be home any time soon."
"Okay, no worries. I'll heat up the leftovers from yesterday."
"Alright, see you tomorrow at shift. I don't think we'll come home tonight."
"Did I do something wrong? You sound weird."
"Listen, I promised Kelly not to say anything okay? And I won't break that promise. Let's talk tomorrow. I really have to go now. Have a nice evening with Brett." Stella couldn't help it.
"Wait, what?! How… she's not even…." But she didn't let him finish the sentence, because she was really mad at him. "I don't want to hear it. Bye Casey." She hung up and went back into the living room where Gabby and Kelly were still sitting on the couch. Kelly had turned the TV on and Gabby was snuggled into his side, covered with a warm blanket. "That looks comfy."
"It is" Kelly reached out for her. "Come here, you can have my right shoulder, maybe even my chest." He joked.
"Well that is an offer I can't deny." She sat down next to them and laid her head on his shoulder. "What a day."
"Tell me about it." Gabby's voice came from under the blanket she had pulled up to her nose. "You know, I heard you, right? You don't have to stay here with me. You can go home."
"Nice try, Dawson." Kelly looked at Stella, who nodded in agreement. "We won't let you alone. Not tonight, not until you feel better and it's better for me to stay here and face the happy couple at the firehouse and not at home. Otherwise I might do something, I'd regret later."
"Like what?" Stella raised an eyebrow. "Kill them both? I'd be more than happy to help."
"Thank you for being the best friends I can imagine." Gabby raised her head a little bit so she should look at them. "I really appreciate you staying here. But did you bring your stuff?"
"Girl, get to know me already" Stella rolled her eyes. "Of course, I brought everything. The moment I heard what had happened, I knew this would take longer."
"You're my heroes." Gabby chuckled. "First Kelly saved the damsel in distress and then you brought me my favorite junk food."
"You're not a damsel in distress, never have been never will be. You're superwoman. I don't know many people who would've made it all the way down and back into the car before breaking down. Hell, I would have started crying on the stairs." Kelly stated.
"True" Stella agreed with him. "I would've made it to the sidewalk though. I'm tougher than you."
"There's no denying that." He agreed with her and reached for the remote. "Want to watch a movie?"
"No" Gabby shook her head. "I just want to sit here and talk, so I don't have to listen to my thoughts." That was what they did. Stella and Kelly tried their best to distract Gabby. They talked about all kinds of stuff but avoided everything Casey or Brett related, which was a real challenge but they handled it with aplomb. When it was time to go to bed, they took their turns in the bathroom and Gabby slipped under the covers of the queen size bed in the bedroom while Stella and Kelly took the large couch in the living room. At first, they thought she finally fell asleep but after 20 minutes they heard crying from the bedroom and Stella got up. "I'll stay with her. Poor thing, she really deserves better than this." "She does." Kelly agreed. "You should've seen her in the car earlier. I've never seen her like that." He sat up and kissed her. "You go in there. Try to calm her down and I'll stay here. See you tomorrow. Sleep well. I love you."
"I love you too." Stella waved at him and opened the door to the bedroom, where Gabby was lying in bad crying. She looked like a picture of misery. Carefully Stella sat down on the bed and touched her shoulder. "Hey sweetheart, scoot over. I'll stay here with you." Gabby did as she was told. "You don't have to."
"I want to." Stella laid down next to her and took her in her arms. "Try to get some sleep."
"I can't" She sobbed. "When I close my eyes, all I can see is them."
"I know but this is not healthy for you. Try to think of your baby boy. You don't want to cause him any harm, do you? You're a strong and single minded woman, Gabriela Dawson. You got this, no matter what and we'll be right here at your side. Every step on the way."
"I don't feel very strong at the moment." Her voice was still shaking and tears escaped her eyes. "I can't stop asking myself the same question over and over again. Why? Why did they do this to me?"
"You might never get the answer to that question." Stella decided it was time for real talk. "You can't let that haunt you. Please Gabby, please try to stop crying and get some sleep." It took Stella almost an hour to get her to sleep and there were several times in the night where she would wake up from Gabby's sobs. The next morning, she felt absolutely whacked and she prayed for a nice and easy shift without any nasty calls. Gabby was still asleep when she got up and walked into the open plan kitchen, where Kelly was already making coffee. "Good morning, beautiful." He kissed her. "Did you two get some sleep?" "Not much. I really think it's not a good idea to work today, yesterday I was mad at Brett and Casey but today I'm furious. She kept asking herself the same question over and over again. I'm afraid we can't leave her alone and she needs to see a doctor. I'm sure her blood pressure will be too high, she's very stressed. I don't have anything here to check it."
"Alright. I'll give April a call." Kelly reached for his phone on the kitchen counter. "You do that, I'll take a quick shower and get ready or do you want to go first?"
"No, I can take one at the firehouse."
Stella walked back into the bedroom, where Gabby was nowhere to be seen. Suddenly the bathroom door opened and a completely dressed Dawson walked out. "Morning."
"Morning. You feel a little bit better today?"
Gabby shrugged. "Not really but there's this numbness, it kind of helps me not to be a sobbing mess."
"Well, that's a start. I think you should see a doctor, just to be sure."
"Yeah maybe that's a good idea."
"Kelly is talking to April right now. Let's go have a coffee or in your case a tea and ask him what she said."
The women left the bedroom and joined Kelly in the kitchen. "Morning, Dawson. I just talked to April. She squeezed you in for an appointment, we'll drop you off at Med on our way to work."
"Okay" Gabby opened several cupboards, looking for some tea. She finally found some and put the bag in the mug Kelly had already placed on the kitchen counter. "I can take a taxi to get the car afterwards."
"No way." Stella interrupted her. "I won't let you anywhere near that place. Kelly and I will get it tomorrow after shift."
Gabby poured some hot water from the kettle into her mug. "I won't be able to avoid them forever. I still need to tell him about the baby."
"That's correct but you don't need to do that today. Do you want me to tell him what happened?" Kelly knew he had to ask her this.
"I don't know. Maybe. I mean you can tell him where you were last night, if he asks. But don't tell him about the baby."
"Of course not. I promise I won't get into details but he needs to know what he did to you. Both of them."
Gabby took a moment to think. "You know what? I'll come to the firehouse after the doctor's appointment. Maye it's time to rip off the band aid."
"At the firehouse?" Stella was not so sure about that. "You don't want to turn it into a trash TV show, do you?"
"No, I was thinking of talking to him in his office but being at the firehouse will help me to stay strong."
"If you say so." Stella was still not entirely convinced. "That's your decision to make."
"I want to do it."
"Then you do it that way." Kelly looked at his watch. "We have to leave now if you want to be there in time for your appointment."
"Alright, let's go. Stella and Kelly took their duffel bags, while Gabby went into the bedroom to get her purse. It was still early and they didn't have any trouble getting to Med in time. Gabby got out of the car and walked into the familiar building. As soon as April saw her, she opened the door to the emergency department and let her in. "Dawson! It's so good to see you. I hear congratulations are in order? I'm so happy for you."
"Thank you, April. But I'm sure Kelly told you what happened?"
"He only said you were having a hard time because of everything going on in Puerto Rico and being pregnant didn't help making it any easier. Kelly Severide is not a tattle tale."
"No, but he's a great friend."
"That he is." April agreed. "Now let's get you a nice room. Natalie will be there to see you soon. She's in the locker room changing. You're her first patient today. Nice coincident, huh?"
"April, you're the best." Gabby followed her into an examination room and April closed the curtains to give her some privacy. "you don't need to change into a gown. Just lay down. I'll take your blood pressure and draw blood. "
"Alright." Gabby did as she was told. It wasn't the first doctor's appointment during her pregnancy. There had been an OBGYN at the refugee camp. She had checked her out on a regularly basis but she hadn't had a proper ultrasound yet. The scanner at the camp was old and you could barely see a thing. She just wished she was not alone. She could really need someone here. Well not someone. Matt., She wanted Matt to be here. But before she could go down that rabbit hole again, the door opened and Natalie walked in. "Gabby Dawson, it's good to have you back."
"Hi Natalie, thank you. It feels good to be back."
Natalie raised an eyebrow. "Yeah sure. You look like you want to be anywhere but here. Want to tell me what happened?"
Gabby shook her head. "I can't. Not yet."
"Okay, in that case I will ask only the important questions. How far along are you?"
"Almost five months."
"Any complications so far?"
"No, just some morning sickness at the beginning. I had an ultrasound in San Juan. They told me it was boy."
"That's great." Natalie smiled at her. "Let's take a look at your baby boy then." She applied some gel on Gabby and pressed the transducer into her belly. After a few seconds a whooshing sound filled the room. "Your baby boy here has a strong heartbeat. Everything looks fine so far. Nothing to be concerned of. But your blood pressure is a little bit high, it's not concerning yet but you have to reduce the stress. Bloodwork looks fine though."
"It's easier said than done." Gabby admitted. "But I'll try my very best."
"That's what I want to hear. I'll tell April to discharge you and give you the number of my OBGYN. She's great and not in this hospital. I guess you want to tell the father first before becoming gossip item number one around here?"
"That's correct." Gabby got dressed again. "I'll do it today. I'm not taking any risks."
"Sounds like a plan." Natalie winked. "Tell him I said hi."
"Will do." They left the examination room and April handed Gabby all the information she needed. When she left the hospital, her phone started ringing in her purse. She took it out and answered the call. "Hey Stella, I just left Med. I'll take a taxi to 51 now, because I can't find the keys to my car. Any idea where they could be?"
"I took them." Stella admitted. "We didn't want you to drive in case things wouldn't go well."
"You really do care about me, don't you?"
"Yeah we love you. Now move your ass over here, I can't wait to see you."
"I'm on my way." Gabby hung up and walked over to the taxi stand. She got into one and told the driver the address of the firehouse. This time she wasn't nervous but she still felt the numbness. It was like her body had started protecting her from her mind. There was no pain, no tears left to cry. At least for now. All she had to do was keeping her eyes open, because the moment she closed them all she could see was the backstabbing bitch of an BFF and her whore hound of an ex-husband kissing each other. She really didn't want to think of it. It made her feel sick to her stomach. It made her flesh crawl. She had not dared to think about the future yet. What role would the backstabbing bitch play in her baby's life? The surrogate mother? Okay. She needed to stop or she would throw up. Her thoughts were interrupted by the driver. "We're here. That makes $15." She handed him the money and walked towards the firehouse. The doors of the apparatus floor were open and the rigs parked. All three of them. Every one of her steps was accompanied with the sound of her heart beating out of her chest. The nearer she got to the firehouse the more she wanted to run. But this was not the time to run. This was the time to fight. She walked through the large doors into the firehouse. No one was there, but she could hear voices from the inside. Gabby took a deep breath and walked toward the familiar silver doors. She felt like throwing up. Her shaking hands reached for the doors and pushed them open. The voices came from the kitchen and she was sure they had seen her by now. Luckily, she was wearing the big hoodie again, she didn't look obviously pregnant. Taking a few steps into the house in direction of the kitchen area, she did not dare to look up. Too afraid of what she might see but after three more steps she had no choice but to lift her head. The voices fell silent. Everyone was looking at her, well everyone but Matt and Sylvie. They were not there and she did not dare to think about there whereabouts. She looked at them and smiled. "Hi guys!"
Herrmann was the first to break the silence. He walked towards her and gave her a hug. "Dawson, what a nice surprise. What brings you here? Missed all the ugly faces, huh?"
Mouch was the next one to approach her followed by Cruz and Capp. "Does that mean we'll get a decent meal today?" Mouch joked.
"I'm afraid not." Gabby was happy they acted normal. Maybe they didn't know what had happened between their Captain and the backstabbing bitch (Gabby refused to even think of her real name). "Wait" Hermann suddenly said. "Why are Kidd and Severide sitting over there on the couch like nothing happened? Did you know she would swing by? They nodded. "You've already seen her, haven't you?" Once again, they nodded. "And you didn't tell us?!"
"Herrmann, I asked them not to. I wanted to surprise you."
"I'll get Casey, Brett and the Chief." Cruz said but Severide stopped him. "No, you won't." He looked at Gabby. "They're talking to Boden."
"Alright, I'll go to his office." Gabby swallowed and tried to compose herself. She didn't want them to notice anything. Thank God no one had noticed her swollen belly while hugging here. They had been too excited to care about the details. "You want me or Stella to come with you? He doesn't know a thing. We haven't talked to him yet." Kelly whispered into her ear. "No, but stand by please. I might need you if things went downhill." Gabby whispered back. "Alright, will do." He gave her hand a squeeze. "You go this, Dawson."
"Thanks, Severide" She winked at him and threw a kiss to Stella while walking out of the common room. The hallway was empty and she didn't know any of the new staff in the bullpen. The door to Boden's office was closed, he was standing behind his desk talking to Casey and Brett, who were standing in front of his desks with their backs turned to her. No one had noticed her standing at the door yet. She reached out three times to knock at the door but she couldn't bring herself to do it. "It's fine, Dawson. Just go in there." She heard Stella's voice behind her. "I will be right here."
That finally gave her the courage to knock. Boden looked up and Brett and Casey turned around. Gabby reached for the handle and opened the door. "Hey, Chief" She chose to ignore the backstabbing bitch and the whore hound for now.
"Dawson" Boden walked around his desk and gave her a tight hug and he noticed. Gabby could tell by the look in his eyes that he had noticed it. But he recovered very soon. "What a nice surprise. It's so great to see you. How have you been since the last time we saw you?"
"Mostly good." It was not a lie. She had not felt like crap until she saw the other two people in the room kissing. "There had been a big earthquake and I couldn't get out of there plus there was no cell phone reception. The landline was gone too. I took the first plane out of there."
"Glad to hear you're fine." Boden looked at Casey and Brett, who still had not said a word. They looked uncomfortable and he sensed that maybe there was a conversation about to happen which he did not want to be part of. "Alright. Brett, that's all. You're dismissed. Casey, I'm sure you want to have a word with Dawson." He still did not dare to look her in the eyes. What a spineless bastard. Gabby didn't feel sad anymore, she was boiling with rage. The backstabbing bitch took the chance to get out of there and went back into the common room. Stella made sure to look daggers at her.
"Um..yeah sure" Casey answered and finally looked her in the eyes. "Want to go to my office?"
"yeah sure" Gabby looked at him and he immediately knew something was very wrong. "Let's go" She followed him through the hallway and into his office. She had not been here the last time she was in Chicago. Nothing had changed but the picture of her was not on his desk anymore. Well at least there was none of Brett. She decided there was no need to beat around the bush. She sat down on his bunk while he took the chair. "I saw you." He didn't get it. "What?"
"Yesterday. I saw you, yesterday" She added. He still looked confused. "Where?"
Okay, that was enough. "I came back to Chicago yesterday, because I needed to talk to you but on my way to your place I got cold feet and decided to swing by my best friend's place before seeing you." Now it hit him. "Oh my God, Gabby. I'm so…."
"Don't you say you're sorry! I saw you standing in front of her door and I heard what she told you and then…then I saw you kissing who I thought was my best friend. But apparently, I was wrong. Apparently, she was in love with you all those years, apparently it had "always been you" and I was just the idiot getting in her way. What about you, huh? What do you have to say about this?" She was still furious but her voice started shaking. Tears threatened to roll down her face. Matt could see how hurt she was and it broke his heart. This was the one person in the world he never wanted to hurt. "I really am sorry, Gabby. I really am and I get that what you thought you were seeing upset you, but…"
"What I thought I was seeing? Are you saying I'm hallucinating? Because your lips clearly had been on hers and I doubt they got there by accident."
"It's not what you think it is." He tried again. "I went there to check on her, maybe you noticed the ambo on the apparatus floor? It's not 61. They had an accident, a pretty bad one and I just wanted to make sure she was okay."
Gabby could not believe her ears. Did he really wanted to make her believe there was nothing going on? It hurt. It really hurt to see the love of her live taking here for an idiot. "And you needed to kiss her for that?"
"No, of course not. It just happened, I didn't mean to." Matt hated himself for the poor explanation he was giving. He could see in Gabby's eyes that she was not buying it.
"Oh, you didn't mean to, then what did you want to do? Lick the lipstick off her lips?! You know what, I don't want to hear it. I came back to Chicago, because I thought there might still be a chance for us, but you made it clear to me there isn't. Don't get me wrong. I don't blame you for kissing somebody. I blame you for kissing my best friend. You of all people should know better than that. Weren't you telling Heather you couldn't be with her because of Andy? Weren't you the one telling Otis not to go after Brett, because Cruz was his best friend and they had just broken up? The Matt Casey I used to know and love had a sense of decency but apparently you lost it." This was not how she had imagined the conversation to go but her emotions had gotten the better of her. She was not able to hold back the tears anymore. She had always thought that Matt would never hurt her. Not like this. Oh, how wrong she had been.
It was hard for Matt to see her like this but he did not know what to say anymore, he only seemed to make things worse. "Gabby, I don't know what to say but I'm really sorry you saw that. I never wanted to hurt you. Would you please let me explain?"
"Okay" Was all she managed to say, maybe he deserved one last chance.
"Like I already told you I went over to Brett's to make sure she was okay. She and Mackey had a pretty bad accident. Some nut job pushed the ambo off a bridge with his truck. Brett was very lucky. She only had some minor injuries but I was worried about her because we had become friends over the last two years. So yesterday after my construction job I stopped by and knocked at her door. She opened it and thanked me for pulling her out of the ambo and then before I knew it she was kissing me."
Gabby had listened to his explanation and she wanted to believe him but she knew what she had witnessed. "You kissed her back, you pushed her into the apartment and then you closed the door." A pair of teary brown eyes was looking at him. "I saw it. And I heard what she said, so please stop making up half ass excuses."
"I'm not making up excuses. I kissed her back for a second, but then I realized it was wrong and I stopped her. I didn't sleep with her. Please Gabby, don't be mad at me. It wasn't my fault."
That was too much for her. "Matt, I saw you kissing her back and it sure did not look like you didn't want it. But you know what hurts the most? That's exactly how our first kiss went. You rescued me and then you showed up at my front door. We both know what happened next and yes, I do believe you when you say you didn't sleep with her. But that doesn't make it any better. You still kissed her and even if she started it, you kissed her back. I had to watch my best friend and the love of my life kiss. Yes. I still love you, I can't help it. That's why this hurts like hell." She looked so small and fragile and all he wanted to do was to hug her, kiss her and tell her everything would be okay. He reached out for her but she slapped his hand away. "Don't touch me" She sobbed. "Don't you dare touching me." She had to get out of there, she could not tell him about the baby, not now when she could barely stand looking at him. He was visibly hurt by her words. Never before had she told him not to touch her. "Gabby, please. What can I do to…" "I don't know, Matt. I don't know." A sob escaped her throat. "Just give me some time. I need to think and we still need to talk. But not now." She wanted to leave but when she moved away from the bunk her hoodie rucked up she tried to pull it back down but it was too late. Matt's eyes widened, he dropped his gaze and looked at her swollen belly. "Gabby? You're pregnant? Is it…"
"Yes and yes" She interrupted him. "That's why I came back to Chicago and that's why I wanted to talk to you but after what I witnessed yesterday… I…I just can't." She was on the verge of another breakdown and stormed out of his office. Stella was sitting on her bed in the bunkroom. Kelly was in his office, doing some paperwork. Both of them noticed Gabby running out of Casey's office with the saddest of all expressions on her face. Immediately followed by Casey. "Gabby, wait" But she did not stop. "Casey, don't" She got up and managed to get in his way. "Let her go. If you still love her, let her go. She needs some time. I will take care of her." She turned around and followed Gabby who was running in towards the bathroom. Meanwhile Kelly had left his office. "Casey, let Stella talk to her." Matt turned around. "Did you know this? Why didn't you tell me? I…"
"Okay, stop right there." Kelly barked. "You want to blame me for not telling you? Fine. But you don't get to yell at me after what you did to this amazing woman."
"I didn't do anything, Brett kissed me not the other way around."
"Brett kissed you and you couldn't stop her? you had to push her back into her apartment while still kissing her? Sorry, I don't buy it. I watched you two over the last few months and I did not say anything because I knew you stayed in contact with Dawson after she came to Chicago. Never in my wildest dreams did I imagine you doing something that stupid. She somehow made it back to her car after she watched you kissing her best friend. When she called me I could barely understand her. I was so worried about her, I told her not to drive home. I went there and had to lift her out of her car, because she wasn't able to walk. She had a complete breakdown. I've never seen her like that. Never. She couldn't stop crying and she kept asking me the same question over and over again: Why? Why would you do this to her? It broke my heart to see her like that. She looked so small and fragile. I called Stella to help me and somehow we managed to get her to eat and hydrate. We couldn't leave her alone, because we were afraid she would choke on her sobs. We begged her to stop crying but she couldn't. Stella stayed with her while I slept on the couch . She barely got her to sleep. This morning we arranged for a doctor's appointment. That's how bad it was. Luckily everything seemed okay only her blood pressure was too high but that's understandable after what she went through. I've never seen her like this, Casey. You and Brett, you completely destroyed her, you stomped on her when she was already on the ground. So please don't tell me you didn't mean to hurt her, because it sure looks like you did." Kelly was so furious, he had missed the change in Casey's expression. At first, he looked sad but now he looked guilty and heartbroken. "Don't you look at me like that" Kelly was in disbelief that Matt never had thought about the consequences his actions might cause. It was not like him. "You thought it was okay to kiss your ex-wife's best friend?" Matt looked down. "No, I didn't. That's why I stopped it the moment the door closed behind us. I told her I could not do that and that I still loved Gabby. She tried to convince me, it was okay but I wouldn't have it. I left and ever since then we haven't talked. Until today, when Boden called us in his office to ask about the accident report."
Kelly sighed. "You know what? I believe you but I'm still mad at you. Dawson went through hell the last 24 hours. She deserves better than that."
"I am mad at myself for being so stupid. I hate myself for doing that to her." Matt had a hard time composing himself. "All she wanted to do is telling me about the baby. Hell, she wanted us to get back together and I ruined it within seconds."
"I'm not so sure about that." Kelly started to feel sorry for his best friend. "Part of the reason for her breakdown was the fact that she really loves you. She still does."
"I know, she told me" Matt ran his fingers through his hair. "I was an idiot, I not only let her go one but two times and as the cherry on top I let her BFF kiss me." He looked at Kelly with teary eyes. "What can I do to make things right again? Because I would do anything."
"I know." Kelly assured him. "But I guess Stella is right. Give her some space, she'll come to you when she's ready. She wants you to be part of your kid's life, she told me that."
"I'm going to be a dad" Matt couldn't believe it. "Yes, you are but before you freak out about that, I have to make sure Dawson didn't kill Brett in the bathroom." Kelly left Matt in the bunkroom and walked towards the locker room. He could hear voices from the bathroom, then he heard a door being pushed open.
"Gabby" Brett walked into the bathroom where Gabby was sitting on the vanity, accompanied by Stella. "What do you want?" She barked. "You already took Matt. When I told you, your Casey was out there, I didn't mean him. Is it so hard for you to find a guy outside this firehouse? Because all you seem to do is inhouse dating."
"That's the pot calling the kettle black" Brett countered. "You left without saying goodbye, you dumped him and now you blame me?"
"Excuse me? I didn't dump him and you don't know why I left. I doubt he told you the real reason, because it's none of your fucking business." She looked at her former best friend. "I heard what you told him. Was it true? Have you always been in love with the love of my life?"
"Of course, not but we got closer after you left and then I started to feel something. When he came to my place yesterday I decided to act on my feelings but he stopped me."
"I know. He told me, because I saw you. I came to your place yesterday, in need of a friend but instead there was a backstabbing bitch kissing Matt. I never thought the two of you would hurt me like this. Never. But here we are and I think there's a slight chance I might forgive Matt but you, I'm not so sure. I'm done here. I need to leave." With that Gabby left the bathroom. Brett was dumbfounded. "How could she say something like that to me?! It really hurt."
Stella looked at the paramedic in disbelief. "Excuse me? Can you please not make everything about you? Gabby is hurt. Really hurt, because she witnessed the ultimate betrayal yesterday. You broke girl code, Sylvie. You don't get to whine about your feelings being hurt, not after doing something like that. You hurt your best friend really bad."
"But she left" Sylvie tried to defend herself. "She left and he was free to do what he wants."
Stella rolled her eyes. "Well that didn't include doing you and you deep inside you know that but you wanted what Gabby had. So, you decided to ignore every rule in the book and just went for it. You had a front row seat to their love story but you still decided to do it and you knew he was not over her. Hell, he never will be over her. He will always lover her and all you ever were to him was a nice distraction. So please stop acting like a whiny cry baby and get your act together. And now excuse me, I need to go and look after my friend, whose heart you stomped on." Stella left the bathroom. She had had enough of Brett and her selfish behavior. She found Gabby in the locker room with Kelly. "Dawson, I think you need to go back in there and talk to him. I told him to give you time but time is not exactly something you two have. He looked at her pregnant belly. "Yeah, I guess you're right. Time to rip the band aid off." "You go girl!" Stella cheered. "Call us if you need help with the body afterwards." Gabby managed to laugh. "Will do." She decided to walk straight back into the bunk room, she knew Matt would be still there and she was right. But so was Sylvie. They were talking in his office or maybe arguing. As she got closer she could hear them. "Matt, I'm not sorry for what I did."
"I don't care if you're sorry or not. Why don't you get it? I don't have that kind of feelings for you. Never had. All you can think about is yourself. We hurt Gabby pretty bad with our idiotic kiss."
"It wasn't idiotic" Sylvie disagreed. "Why do you still want her back after everything she did to you? Don't you see that I'm better for you?"
"EXCUSE ME?!" Matt was furious. "After everything she did to me? She did nothing to me, I was the one who hurt her, I made her go to Puerto Rico because I refused to listen to her. You want to know why she left? We had a fight about the right way to have children. It was a stupid fight but I was too stubborn to admit I was wrong. Her leaving had nothing to do with her being selfish. Gabby is the least selfish person I know. She doesn't make everything about herself, unlike you. You always think about yourself first and I'm sick of it. You're not better for me. You never meant anything to me." Sylvie left his office and looked at Gabby. "Congratulations. You won." She took a closer look at her. "But I guess you knew that about 6 months ago."
"Five months ago, and you're right but this was never about me winning, this was always about you realizing you never stood a chance."
Brett left the bunk room and Gabby walked back into Matt's office. "I'm sorry for telling you about the baby like that. I never meant to do it like that."
"No." He stopped her. "Stop saying you're sorry. You don't need to be sorry about anything. I am the one to blame here. I should've stopped Brett earlier but I didn't. "
"All that matters to me is that you did stop her." Gabby took a deep breath. "The fact that you never wanted to kiss her and what you said to her made me realize, that I might be able to forgive you."
"Do you think that maybe one day you'll be able to not only forgive me but give us a second chance?"
"Maybe" Gabby sat down on the chair. She reached into her pocket and got the ultrasound picture out. "Here. That's your son." She smiled at him. "I am very happy about this."
"Gabby" He as visibly touched. "It's a boy?" She nodded. "He's amazing. Just like his mommy." He paused and looked at her baby bump. "May I?"
"Yes" She took his hand and placed it on her bump. The moment Matt's hand touched her, she felt their son kicking. He must have felt I too, because he looked at her in awe. Was that…?" "Yes, that was our son kicking. This is the first time I could feel it from the outside. He must know that his daddy is here."
"I'm sorry for being such an idiot." He took his hand from her baby bump and placed it on her arm. "Do you think that maybe one day we'll be a family?"
"We already are a family, Matt. I just need some time to think about everything but I want you in my life."
"I want you in my life too. Both of you." He took her hands. "Gabby, I know you need time but I do want you to know that I never stopped loving you and I know there's still a lot to talk about but I want us to be together again one day."
"I want that too." Gabby admitted. "I never stopped loving you either but like you said, there's a lot to talk about." She squeezed his hands. "I need a little bit more time but this time we'll make sure we're never breaking up again, deal?"
"Deal"