Author's Note: This was fun to write. :D Sorry to anyone who was having problems viewing the last chapter - I think this site was having update problems for about a week, after I posted it. But hopefully everything's fixed now.
Jane pushed open the door to her safehouse, her mind still preoccupied by her parting from Kurt. When a startled gasp and a clatter met her ears, her attention was wrenched out of its rut.
"Oh, my god—Jane…"
Patterson stood in the kitchen, wearing only a towel wrapped around her torso,. A bowl of cereal was partially upended on the counter, and she was staring at Jane with all-encompassing horror, her mussed, damp hair lending a comedic touch to the scene.
"This isn't what it looks like," Patterson said in a rush.
Shocked, reflexive laughter bubbled up inside her, but Jane fought to maintain a straight face. "It, uh, looks like you and Roman did more than just play board games last night."
Patterson covered her face with her hands and groaned. "We did. We totally did. Roman said you wouldn't be back for another hour, and I was just gonna eat this cereal and then go. This…this wasn't how I wanted you to find out. I'm sorry."
She blew out a breath and waited for Jane's judgment.
Which meant that Jane had to figure out how she felt about this whole thing, and her brain was still too taken aback to process it all.
"So…where's Roman?" she asked hesitantly.
"He was in the shower. I think he just shut the water off as you got in." Patterson abandoned the cereal and began to pick clothing up off the floor, her face flushing with embarrassment. "I'll just, um, I'll get dressed and I'll…I'll go. You're probably tired after your trip, so…"
Jane set down her go bag on the nearby table, and stooped to pick up a bundle of cloth, realising only as she straightened that it was Patterson's shirt, her bra still tangled inside it. "Uhhh, here."
"Thanks." Patterson took the clothing from her, avoiding her eyes. "God, this is…awkward."
"Yeah," Jane agreed, and they both laughed, breaking the tension slightly.
"Hey." Roman's voice came from the doorway, filled with trepidation. He was dressed in sweatpants and a T-shirt, which had clearly been pulled on in a hurry. "I thought your flight was only getting in about now."
"Nope. The text said I'd be home about now." Jane sighed and picked up her bag. "I'm gonna go unpack."
Roman and Patterson exchanged a swift, panicked glance, and Jane stared at them both, putting the pieces together. "You spent the night in my bed? Roman!"
Patterson studiously began to clean up spilled cereal as Roman sighed. "Look, sis, I'm sorry. I know this is…weird."
Jane pushed past him into the bedroom, stifling an irritated noise at the disarray he'd left her personal space in.
"I've been sleeping on the couch, remember? There's only one bed in the house, and you weren't using it. I, uh, was planning to change the sheets before you came back," Roman added, his voice sheepish. He rubbed the back of his neck uncomfortably. "I'll get it done before you go to bed tonight, I swear."
She wanted to be back on the road trip with Kurt so badly at that moment. Biting her tongue, she dumped her dirty laundry into the hamper in the corner of the room, then set about refilling her go bag for the next emergency—a few pairs of underwear, a spare sports bra, some socks, pyjama pants and T-shirts. I should just take this right now and go over to Kurt's…
Wait.
She spun to face the doorway, but Roman had retreated. Following the sounds of a quiet argument back to the living room, she found Patterson struggling into her shirt while Roman retrieved various items of his own clothing from the floor.
They both looked up guiltily as she came in. "You know what? Don't worry about it. I'm gonna go crash at Kurt's."
Patterson's brows rose, a small smile at the corners of her lips. If the situation had been different, Jane might have allowed herself to be drawn in for some gossip, but she still needed time to process before she could act normal around her friend.
"You're over-reacting," Roman protested.
"You had sex in my bed."
"We're both consenting adults—"
"I'm not saying you can't have sex, I just… I need a little time where I don't have to be around you, while I try to wrap my head around this. Patterson is one of my best friends." Before he could reply, she added to Patterson, "And Roman is my brother."
"I know. I know." Patterson held up her hands as Roman came to stand protectively beside her. "Just…take your time. We can talk about it tomorrow, maybe?"
"Yeah. See you guys tomorrow."
Jane headed for the door, still conflicted about this whole thing. As she opened it, Patterson added, "For what it's worth, I'm happy that you and Kurt…" She interrupted herself before Jane could reply, taking her cue from the incredulous look on her friend's face. "You know what? This isn't the time for that conversation, so, um…bye."
"Bye." Jane made her escape before her mind could unravel any further.
Kurt had just finished unpacking, and was considering what to make as a snack, when there was a familiar knock on the door.
No… Can't be her. I just dropped her off less than an hour ago.
Even so, his hopes rose as he crossed to the apartment door. Pulling it open without checking the peephole first, he broke into a smile. "Hey."
"Hey." Jane looked up at him, seeming a little shy. "I, uh… I was kind of hoping I could stay here tonight. I know that wasn't the plan, but…"
He silenced her with a quick kiss, then drew her into the apartment. "Sure you can. Did something happen with Roman?"
"You could say that." Exasperation colouring her tone, Jane pushed the door shut behind her and let her bag slide to the ground. He held her lightly by the hips, not wanting to smother her with too much affection while her mind was preoccupied, but unable to help but remain in contact with her.
"Is he okay?" Kurt was reasonably sure the answer was 'yes'—she never would have left his side otherwise—but he couldn't quite get a read on the situation.
Jane rolled her eyes. "Oh, he's fine. All that worrying I was doing about him last night? Totally unnecessary, because Patterson was kissing him all better. In my bed."
Kurt's mind came to a standstill for a moment as he adjusted to the idea. "Patterson and Roman?"
Jane nodded, outrage and amusement both blooming in her expression.
Kurt attempted to keep a straight face. "Do I want to know how you found this out?"
"Patterson was pouring cereal in my kitchen as I walked through the door. Dressed in nothing but a towel. And there were clothes all over the floor." Jane rested her forehead on his shoulder, a small grunt of annoyance muffled between them. "I should have handled it better than I did, but…"
Kurt allowed himself a quick grin before he pressed his lips to the top of her head. "Come on, let's grab some coffee and sit down. Unless you need something stronger. You know—for the shock."
"Don't tempt me," Jane grumbled, lifting her head to look up at him again. Her eyes softened. "Coffee's good. Thanks."
Kurt had been waiting for a new pot to brew as he'd pondered the refrigerator. It was just about done, but he couldn't help but give his partner another soft, lingering kiss before he moved away. Jane was more addictive than caffeine could ever be.
He poured them each a mug of black coffee as she leaned against the breakfast bar, then handed one to her, his skin tingling as their fingers brushed.
"Thanks," Jane said softly, smiling down at the mug.
He took his own mug and led the way to the couch, speaking over his shoulder. "You know, this reminds me of when I found out Reade was dating my sister. Seems like years ago, but it wasn't long after you first came to us."
"I actually forgot about that," Jane admitted, sitting beside him and folding one leg beneath her. "I remember you were angry, but there was a lot going on around that time. We never really talked about it."
Kurt sighed, thinking back to his mishandling of the situation. "Yeah. I just…" He caught himself. "You should be the one talking right now."
Jane snorted. "Please. I would really rather focus on your sibling issues than mine right now."
"Okay." He sipped his coffee, marshalling his thoughts. "We were in the middle of the Fischer thing when Reade told me. He was afraid I'd hear it from someone else because of his polygraph. Said he'd never found the right time to tell me. Later, I asked him if it was serious between him and Sarah, and when he said it was, I just told him to end it and walked off."
Jane took his hand. "I can understand the reaction. My head is kind of spinning with the idea of Patterson and Roman, so…"
He squeezed her hand. "You probably handled them better than I handled Sarah."
Jane frowned up at him. "What happened?"
"I let my own issues get in the way. You know how dangerous our job is, and…all I could see when I looked at Reade was someone I had to protect, if I wanted Sarah to be happy."
"Oh, Kurt…" Jane leaned her head against his shoulder.
"I know. I knew how happy he made her. She'd been coming home for weeks from dates and sleepovers, looking happier than I'd seen her for years. But as soon as I found out who she was dating, I couldn't see that. All I could imagine was the worst case scenario. I just imagined having to tell her that I'd let her boyfriend die in the field; imagined her hating me for not protecting Reade better."
He sipped his coffee, then shook his head. "I yelled at Sarah that I couldn't do it, that the pressure of having to protect everyone all the time was just breaking me. She packed her stuff and started to move out the next day."
"Oh, no," Jane murmured sympathetically. "You must have felt horrible."
"It wasn't my finest hour," he agreed, shame returning to him with the memory. "We talked it out later, but I wish I hadn't reacted that strongly."
"You're only human," Jane said. "And feeling responsible for Reade's safety was something you did anyway, even before Sarah started dating him."
"Yeah." Kurt dragged his mind back to the present. "I know you're not Patterson's boss or anything, but…"
Jane deflated a little. "After what happened with Borden, and David, I just… I don't want to see her get hurt again. The end of her last two relationships were technically my fault, and—"
"No, they weren't," Kurt interrupted, not caring that he was cutting her off. "Patterson doesn't blame you. None of us hold you responsible for that."
"Even so, it was my tattoo that led to David's death."
"No. David was trying to be an agent. He wasn't qualified, and he had no backup. He was out of his depth. You and Patterson can argue all day over whether you or she could have done more to save him, but it won't change what happened, Jane." Kurt met her eyes steadily. "And Borden? He played all of us. You didn't know he was a mole until around the same time Patterson did."
"I guess," Jane said, sounding anything but convinced.
"But I get why you're worried about her with Roman." Kurt attempted to pull her out of the spiral of self-recrimination, kissing her temple gently.
"Roman… He's my brother, and I love him so much, but what happened to him as a kid really screwed him up. He's not—" She caught herself mid-syllable, guilt in her eyes.
Kurt filled in what he guessed she'd been about to say. "Stable."
"Yeah." Jane stared into her coffee cup unhappily. "I know I can't compare before the ZIP to how he is now, and he was having a breakdown when he was in the cell because of his claustrophobia, but he's gonna need a lot of help. I don't want Patterson taking that on. She needs a partner who can steady her."
"I know." It worried Kurt, too. These days, he thought of Patterson like a little sister—he couldn't stand to see her suffering, especially after Borden's final betrayal.
Jane scowled. "And Patterson—I know I asked her to take care of Roman, but she slept with him. In my bed."
Imagining how he would have felt if he'd found out Reade and Sarah had been in his own bed, Kurt winced. "In Roman's defence, I guess the ankle monitor meant they couldn't go anywhere else."
"And she knows he's traumatised," Jane continued, ignoring Kurt's words. "He doesn't have his head on straight right now. They're both traumatised, and…"
She trailed off with a sigh. "They're grown adults. It's none of my business. At least, it wouldn't be, if they'd gotten dressed and changed the sheets before I got home. I can't control how they feel about each other. I just wish it didn't feel like a disaster waiting to happen, you know?"
"I know. But whatever happens, we'll help them through it." I hope.
"I just feel so responsible," Jane half-whispered.
"You're already doing so much for Roman. And I know how much Patterson values your friendship, too. You can't take the whole world on your shoulders, Jane."
Even as he spoke, he knew what her response would be. Sadly amused, she nudged him with her shoulder. "You should take your own advice, sometimes."
"Nah. Easier to deal it out to other people."
She laughed despite herself, then leaned over to the coffee table to put down her mug. When she turned back to him, her expression was wearily affectionate.
"Thank you," she told him.
"For what?"
"More things than I can count. But most recently, for listening. And for giving me a place to crash while my brother and my best friend are building a love nest in my safehouse."
"Let's not think about that." Kurt set down his own mug and pulled Jane into his lap. "Right now, I'm just gonna focus on how happy I am that you're here. Though I should probably tell you the bad news now."
Jane blinked down at him, waiting with a slight frown for the 'bad news'.
"There's only one adult-sized bed in the apartment, so we're gonna have to share again." He grinned as she gave his arm a light punch in retaliation for misleading her.
"Yeah, that sounds awful." She laughed as he nuzzled her neck. "But somehow, I guess we'll make the best of it."
"Somehow." He nipped her earlobe teasingly.
She ran her fingers down his arm, her voice becoming huskier. "I just hope we can get more sleep tonight than we did last night. You know, since we might have to dodge bullets in the morning?"
"Hmm. I was hoping the bullet-dodging could wait until noon, at least." Kurt kissed her jaw, and she immediately turned her head to guide his lips to hers.
I will never get tired of kissing this woman.
He wasn't sure if the kiss lasted a minute or an hour. All that mattered was that it consumed them both equally, until they broke apart with breathless smiles, heat in their shared gaze.
"Maybe if we get the distracting stuff out of the way before bedtime, we can get a good night's sleep?" Jane suggested softly.
"I think you're underestimating how much I want to distract you. But it's worth a try."
Author's Note: And this is probably the end of the fic! I haven't made Jeller say 'I love you' yet, but I'm really not sure if I have anything in my head for a last chapter, so I don't want to force it. So I'm going to mark this fic as complete and then un-complete it if inspiration strikes at a later date. Thank you all so much for reading! I'd love to know what you thought of the story. :)