Wonderland

A Julia songfic

Flashing lights and we
Took a wrong turn and we
Fell down a rabbit hole
You held on tight to me
'Cos nothing's as it seemed
And spinning out of control

"Wanna come to the carnival with me?"

Julia looked up from her magazine with a raised eyebrow. "And why would I do that?"

"Hopefully because you want to?" Karl gave her a charming smile that she hated to admit was working. Didn't he have someone else to annoy?

"I'm going with Gracie and Louise," she said dismissively, looking back to her magazine. "Maybe next time."

"Ditch them," Karl shrugged, putting his hands in his pockets. Through her eyelashes she could see him grinning at her but pretended not to notice.

"Unlike you, I actually like my friends," she said shortly, turning the page. Out the corner of her eye, she saw a few girls whispering and pointing at them in scandal. "What brought this on? Is this supposed to be my thank you for making sure you don't fail math?"

"Maybe," he said, shrugging again. "So, if you just happen to find yourself by the Ferris wheel at around nine, that would be just us running into each other, wouldn't it?"

Before she could quip back, Karl was already leaving. Julia smiled from behind her magazine, trying her hardest not to blush.

Didn't they tell us don't rush into things
Didn't you flash your green eyes at me
Haven't you heard what becomes of curious minds?

"I'll catch up with you guys later," Julia said, her eyes on the Ferris wheel. Louise had run off with some other girl in their class, saying something about the hall of mirrors, while Gracie's boyfriend Max was tagging along. And as much as she liked the two of them, their constant cooing at each other was just on the other side of annoying.

"Where are you going?" Gracie exclaimed, breaking away from giggling with Max to join her.

"I think I might try out the Ferris wheel," Julia said, trying to sound casual. She had a few minutes before it was nine, and she didn't want Gracie following. "I'll catch up with you guys later."

Gracie looked back to Max, who was already pulling her into the direction of the carousel, and gave Louise a quick, excited grin before following him. Louise waved them off, smiling a little at Gracie's antics. It was about time the two of them realized how much they liked each other. And that he had no problem with her being a mermaid… she couldn't believe how lucky they were.

She wove through the crowd, and when she finally made it, the first thing she saw was Karl's smile. Her heart seemed to calm down and speed at the same time, and she immediately smoothed out the fabric of her dress. She didn't normally get nervous around guys, what made Karl so different?

Oh, didn't it all seem new and exciting
I felt your arms twisting around me
I should've slept with one eye open at night

Fireworks lit up the sky, and Karl snuck a quick kiss on Julia's cheek.

She blushed brightly, and she was glad that the darkness concealed it. She looked over to him, her eyes wide. "Why did you do that?"

"Because I wanted to," he said confidently, but his demeanor quickly softened at her expression. "Unless… I'm sorry, Julia, I shouldn't have assumed-"

Julia cut him off with a kiss of her own, the fireworks lighting up the sky and his surprised eyes when she broke away. She smiled shyly again, giggling softly. "It's okay," she whispered, and reached over, taking his hand and resting her head on his shoulder. The two watched the fireworks go off from the top of the Ferris wheel, and Julia sighed with contentment.

We found wonderland
You and I got lost in it
And we pretended it could last forever

"I'm dating Karl," Julia announced a few weeks later. Gracie and Louise looked at her in shock.

"Julia, what about our secret?" Gracie demanded, looking around to make sure no one was looking.

"I'm being careful," she said shortly, an edge creeping into her voice. "I'm not stupid, Gracie."

"We're not saying you are," Louise said, trying to choose her words carefully. "It's just… why Karl? He's a creep."

"Not to me," Julia said, smiling softly. "He's a way better guy than I thought. I can trust him."

She chose not to see the hesitant looks between her best friends and dove into the water away from them. She knew him, knew him better than she ever thought she would.

So, we went on our way
Too in love to think straight
All along or so it seemed
But there were strangers watching
And whispers turned to talking
And talking to screams

"I feel like we never see her anymore," Gracie complained as she walked with Louise to class.

"At least she's happy." Louise reminded her. "I don't like Karl either, but she apparently sees something in him. We have to respect that, Gracie."

"I do," Gracie pouted. "I just don't want her to get hurt. You know what a jerk Karl is."

"We'll be there if she needs us, that's all we can do."

"I've got a bad feeling about all this."

"Well, it worked out with you and Max, right?" Louise said. "Maybe it'll be the same with those two."

They rounded a corner just in time to see Karl and his friends shoving someone to the ground and yelling a few improper words at their victim before walking away. Gracie's eyes went wide, and after checking on the other kid, went to find Julia, who shrugged off what her friend had to say.

"Maybe it was a misunderstanding," she said rationally. "Karl wouldn't do that."

"But he did!" Gracie exclaimed, Louise nodding in agreement beside her. "We saw him!"

"No, no, he wouldn't," she repeated again.

Didn't they tell us don't rush into things
Didn't you flash your green eyes at me?
Didn't you calm my fears with a Cheshire cat smile?

It was a couple months after their kiss at the fair, and a few weeks since Julia told Gracie and Louise about her relationship with Karl. It was a beautiful day, but even the happiness Julia felt was hampered by the dark cloud of her secret. She had to tell him; it was only fair.

"Karl, I have something to tell you," she said hesitantly.

"What is it, Jules?"

"It's… hard to say," she said nervously. "It's a little difficult to explain, and you might not believe me."

He stopped and pulled away, and for a moment, Julia thought he was leaving. But instead, he pulled her close to him, pressing his lips to her in a passionate kiss. For a moment, everything melted away, and Julia nearly went weak in his arms. When they pulled away, she stared up at him, her eyes wide, and his smile understanding.

"Anything you have to tell me, I'll understand, Jules," he said quietly. "I love you."

A surge of emotion went through Julia, and she breathed, "I love you too."

Didn't it all seem new and exciting
I felt your arms twisting around me
It's all fun and games 'til somebody loses their mind

They had tried to warn her. Julia had told Louise and Gracie about her intentions of telling Karl her secret, it was only fair after all. They tried to tell her not to; they saw the person he really was. Unfortunately, Julia thought she did too.

"Karl, please, you said you loved me!" Julia cried out, trying to hold him, but he cruelly pushed her away.

"Then why didn't you tell me sooner? All that talk about trust, was it just nothing?"

His eyes looked completely different as he glared at her. They were hard and cruel; he looked nothing like the nervous boy who kissed her cheek under the fireworks.

"I'm still the same person you knew yesterday," she insisted, and her voice started to crack as she struggled not to cry. "I thought you deserved to know the truth."

His face contorted into a look of pure disgust and he pushed her away. "Just stay away from me, you, you, you… freak!"

Julia stood still on the beach, her mouth slightly agape as he turned and left. She could hear her own heartbeat pounding in her ears, but it didn't overpower the loop of what he said. When she finally looked up, she saw Gracie and Louise walking up the docks, but she just couldn't deal with anyone else. Julia shook her head and dove into the water, speeding off in any direction that took her away from there.

When he asked to meet her a few weeks later, she should've known it was a trap.

I reached for you
But you were gone
I knew I had to go back home
You search the world for someone else
To make you feel like what we had
And in the end, in Wonderland, we both went mad

Julia didn't know how long she had been sitting on the dock, holding her knees as she stared at the water. Gracie and Louise were giving her space, which she was grateful for. She should've known. Karl was everything everyone said he was… She was stupid for thinking otherwise.

She softly touched her lips; the very memory of their kisses made her stomach turn. The look on his face when she had told him her secret, something that she didn't even entrust her parents with… that look she knew would haunt her the rest of her life.

The girls had kept trying to cheer her up, and on a deep level she didn't want to admit to, she was grateful that they cared so much, but right now all Julia wanted was to curl up and never move again. Out of the corner of her eye, she saw Gracie and Louise approaching her, but still didn't move.

"Honey, I am so sorry," Gracie whispered, wrapping her arms around Julia, who gratefully reciprocated it. She didn't want to talk about it, and thankfully they understood that without even having to say it.

"You wanna go for a swim?" Louise asked, kneeling beside her friends. "We haven't gone swimming together in a while."

"Yeah," Julia nodded, breaking away from Gracie and wiping her eyes. She smiled gratefully at her two friends, and they all dove into the water.