Hello… this is kind of a filler chapter and I wasn't even sure I should post it but I haven't had the best of weeks and I needed both the distraction and the hurt/comfort. Eventually I decided to post it because: what the heck? It's already written…

So here it goes!

. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .

Chapter 3: It takes two people to fight

By this point in his life, Alex had lost count of how many times he'd woken up on a hospital bed. He was 20 years old and he must've been hospitalized at least half that number.

So when he opened his eyes to white curtains and beeping machines, he remained calm. Hospitals were controled environments, not dangerous per se, unless you count the reason you end up in them which in his case can cover a wide expanse of scenarios.

The lastest one: having a panic attack because he'd been blindsided by the fact his uncle was alive and his brother knew about it.

Ian...

Ben. Ben and Ian.

Vict. Focus on Vict.

He needed to find him.

Alex was dismayed to notice someone had put him on a hospital gown and that he was hooked to an IV, which must have been carrying some kind of pain medication because his neck felt stiff but not painful and his shoulder was hardly a bother. He wanted to take it out.

But seeing as he didn't want to end up on the bad side of whatever nurse came through that curtain next, he decided not to just jank it out and take care of it himself. He wanted to be let go soon so he could go looking for Vict. And talk to Ben. And Ian. Because how could they do something- Vict. Focus on Vict.

He pressed the call button and waited for someone to appear while he tried to keep all thoughts of Ian and Ben from his mind.

An elderly woman with short black and white hair came to his call and regarded him with such kind eyes it was hard not to smile at her when she praised him for being awake.

"You gave everyone quite the scare out there" she said in a tone that was both scolding and light. Alex chose to ignore the comment.

"Do you know if I have to stay here for long?" he asked instead.

"Young people" the nurse said shaking her head as she came closer to him "Always in a hurry"

"I need to look for someone. He was in the car accident with me" she checked the IV bag that was already empty, which told him he must have been unconscious for at least two hours.

"Ahhh that boy from box 3" Alex perked up at that.

"Do you know how he is? Is he okay?"

"He's stable but has a nasty concussion that one" he's hurt. Vict was hurt, because of him.

"I need to go see him. Is he awake?"

"He was moved to one of the upper floors because he's being admitted for a 48 hour observation period" Alex really, really wanted to get out of there and go find him.

"But you said he was stable"

"And I also said he has a nasty concussion. Worse than yours" I don't have...

"I don't have a concussion" he stated the first thing that came to his mind.

"Really? Try standing up on one leg and say the alphabet backwards. I didn't mean right now!" the woman exclaimed scandalized when Alex went to get up from the bed "I was joking. Now, get back on that bed"

"But I need to go see him" he got the feeling he sounded like a broken record, but he didn't care.

"You will, you will" she said with a placating manner "Once you're checked by the doctor and I assume the police will want to talk to you" Alex's stomach sank. I caused the crash. It was my fault. He swallowed.

"Police?"

"They were asking questions a while ago. I guess they'll want to get a statement, though I haven't seen them for a while"

"But-"

"Ah! Finally I got away from the man in box 5" a doctor said suddenly upon walking through the curtain "Alex, right? Car accident, complaints of neck, head and shoulder pain, unconsciousness due to stress?" stress, right.

"Umm, yeah"

"Alright, let's take a look at this"

Again, Alex bit his tongue and just went with it. The sooner he was done here, the sooner he could go to Vict.

The man was very methodic about his examination, asking questions here and there to complement his assesments. Alex specially had a hard time agreeing to take off the top part of the light blue gown he was wearing so the man could manipulate his shoulder.

He's just a doctor. Just a doctor.

"There seems to be some swelling of the tendon but some painkillers and lots of ice should take care of that" the man signaled for him to put the gown back up "Your neck though... I'm gonna give you another dose of this and the same painkillers for your shoulder should work on it too. I think the headache has more to do with the tension in your neck muscles than with a concussion but try not to hit your head again for a while. You need to avoid extanuating activities for the next couple of weeks but, overall, I think you were lucky. You're in pretty good shape" yeah, that was him, the luckiest person in the world.

"So I can leave?"

"I don't see why you shouldn't. Is there someone out there we can call for you?"

"No" he answered, though he knew from experience that Ben was never too far away when he was hurt. He just felt like he couldn't deal with that particular situation right now.

"Oh! There's that handsome man on the waiting room asking about you every five minutes"

"Martha..." the doctor laughed shaking his head "You're a lost cause, really" the woman, Martha, turned to Alex.

"He's your brother right? He and that other man were making quite the scene earlier too" Alex's heart quickened at that. So it hadn't been his imagination, something he was still praying was the explanation for what he remembered.

"Can I go now?" he asked again, impatiently.

"I'll give you the medication and then you're free to go"

Alex refused the nurse's help to change back into his clothes, though bending down to put on his shoes made spikes dig painfully into his brain. His shirt was dirty and had some bloodstains on it but he didn't care. He needed to move.

They made him sign a release form and then shoved him through the doors back to the waiting room of the ER. The place was so full that Alex was sure they were glad to get rid of him.

Alex scanned the crowd nervously looking out for either Ben, Ian or the police. Out of the three, he was more worried about the police wanting to take him in before he was able to see Vict.

In the end, though, it was Ben he'd spotted pacing in front of some chairs, which made him turn around fast so the older man didn't see him. He started heading away from there.

He would've liked to use the stairs and save himself the time it would take for the elevator to arrive, but even when he hadn't been seriously hurt in the crash, he was sore and his pounding head wouldn't appreciate the excercise. The moment the doors opened he stepped inside and made sure to hide behind the other occupants of the elevator in case Ben decided to glance his way at that precise moment. The doors dinged closed and Alex let out a relieved sigh.

It was hard not to feel like a fugitive when all he wanted to do was get away from his own brother, keep a look out for his uncle (his not so dead anymore uncle) and the police.

Alex liked to think he was a good person, with a complicated and shady past, yes, but a good person none the less, so he wasn't actually going to run away from the police if they came to arrest him. He just wanted to make sure they didn't do it before he was certain that Vict was going to be okay.

It took some time and a lot of persuation on his part for people to guide him through the different hospital floors until they told him where Vict was. They'd given him a room of his own and even though he'd insisted they were as close as one could get, no one gave him any detailed information about his condition. He'd just have to wait and see.

He wasn't proud of the amount of time it took him to gather the courage to enter the room once he found it. There were so many scenarios that could be waiting for him. Vict could still be unconscious, hooked up to a ventilator and hanging on by a thread. Or he could be awake but have serious repercussions after his head injury. He could even be completely fine but so angry at him that he'd scream at him to leave him alone forever, that he never brought anything but heartache and pain into his life.

Alex steeled his nerves. It was time to know, and however things might go, he just needed to know.

He opened the door slowly and went inside. His heart stopped when the first thing he saw was the terrifying bruise on Vict's forehead.

There was a row of steri-strips covering a thin line just above his temple and some other scratches on his face and arms. The thing that stood out the most though, was the fact that he was awake.

"Alex!" Vict was half sitting on the propped up bed, but as soon as he closed the door behind him, the older boy sat up straighter "They wouldn't tell me anything about you. Are you okay?" he sounded genuinly concerned, not angry, not like before. He also didn't look as bad as Alex had imagined. He nodded as he shyfully approached the bed.

"I'm fine" he answered, lingering a few feet away from the bed.

"What are you doing? Get over here..." Vict beconed him over and Alex had no other choice but to comply, seeing as the other boy was scooting over to give him room to sit on the bed. Alex sat down but remained silent, he didn't know what to say "What is it?" Vict asked.

Alex stared at him for a few seconds before answering, shaking his head to get rid of the images rolling around in his mind: the wreckage, the blood, the car. Vict unconscious, Ian alive...

"How are you?" he asked. The older boy shrugged.

"Sore, I guess. And my head hurts a lot. They say I can't sleep for more than an hour straight for the time being, so that's gonna be a challenge" it made sense, Alex thought, if Vict had such a nasty concussion that they'd want to monitor it as closely as possible, but having to wake him up every hour to make sure he didn't slip into a coma wasn't exactly fun "I'm better off than the last time I went to the hospital though" and Alex knew all about that time. Even if the memory of that day wasn't a pleasant one, the fact that Vict compared his injuries with those and still thought those were worse meant a great deal of relief for Alex.

The blond then put a hand on Vict's shoulder and leaned forward to hug him. When he felt Vict's arms surround him as well, he almost felt like weeping.

"I'm sorry" and if only he'd started their previous conversation that way, there might have been no fight and therefore no accident "I'm so sorry, I wasn't paying attention and I was so stupid for being angry and now you're hurt because of it. I'm sorry" he confessed into the other boy's shoulder. Vict ended the embrace and held Alex at arm's lenght, regarding him with a serious expression.

"The crash wasn't your fault Alex" but the blond shook his head.

"I was driving, I missed a red light" Vict frowned.

"Hasn't the police talked to you?" it was Alex's turn to frown "One of them was here not long ago. I think he was a detective? He said the other car rammed into us. You didn't miss any red light. Our light was green, that much I remember" the blond was sure he shouldn't feel relieved about it but he did.

"Do you remember everything?" because maybe he didn't and that's why he didn't seem angry right now. He must have shown his doubts on his face because Vict softened his expression and ran his fingers through the hair at the back of Alex's head.

"It takes two people to fight, Al. It would've been my fault too"

"I'm still sorry"

"Me too" Vict tugged on his arm until their lips met softly, once, twice, three times and then they rested their foreheads together "Are you sure you're okay?" the older boy asked. Alex felt compelled to tell the truth.

"My neck's a little stiff but I'm fine. I can sleep all night if I want to" and right then he'd give anything to always be able to banter with Vict the way they always did.

"Ouch" the older boy said, faking hurt and clutching a hand at his chest.

"I'll stay with you though" Alex added unnecessarily, he wouldn't leave the hospital until Vict did too and the other boy knew it.

"You don't have to, you should rest too"

"I'll rest here"

"Okay" he didn't put much of a fight and Alex chuckled because Vict looked more than relieved at not having to spend the next two days alone.

Vict then rested his head forward on Alex's shoulder and the blond carded his fingers carefuly through his hair. He must've had one hell of a headache if his concussion was so bad he couldn't sleep much for now. Alex's neck was protesting the movement of his arm and so was his shoulder but he'd be damned if he put his comfort above Vict's. Vict was all that mattered to him right now.

But a knock on the door had the two boys sitting straitghter and Alex didn't miss the fact Vict flinched when he moved back, bringing a hand to his side. Was he hurt more than he was letting on?

"I figured you'd be here" Ben's voice reached him from the doorway and Alex's reaction was instantanous. All other thoughts left his mind to be replaced with warning bells spiking up is own headache. His back stiffened and his eyes darkened so much that Vict frowned at him before greeting the newcomer.

"Hi Ben" he said. Alex remained quiet and with his back to the door. He dropped his eyes to his lap and bit his tongue. He didn't know what to say. He didn't know what to think. And he didn't know how to act when the one person he could always turn to for anything was the same person he wanted to avoid. His brain and his heart were short circuiting and he didn't know how to handle that.

"They didn't have apple juice" Ben stated, probably walking further into the room though Alex wasn't gonna turn around and check.

"Bummer) Vict must have been awake for a while if he and Ben had already been talking before he showed up. Alex began playing with the hem of the sheets.

"Everything alright Al?" Ben asked and what sort of question was that? Couldn't he see that everything was not alright? That Vict was hurt and Ian was alive and he had lied and there was a crash and they'd fought and everything was so not okay!

Instead of saying any of that, Alex looked up briefly at Vict's questioning eyes, no doubt puzzled by the blond's strange behavior and he thought about answering, he really did think about turning around and facing the problem right then, but then the feeling of betrayal hit home again when he remembered Ben's words from earlier: I told you to wait before seeing him. Ben had known. He had known something as important as his uncle being alive and he'd never said anything. He'd betrayed him. He couldn't handle a betraying Ben, he just couldn't.

So he merely shook his head before hiding it on Vict's shoulder, reversing their roles from a few seconds ago. He put his arms around the other boy's back and just prayed silently for Ben to leave, just leave so he could be able to think again, able to breathe again without the oppresive presence of his brother (not brother) by his side.

Vict hugged him back, not before Alex felt him signaling Ben, probably saying that he had no idea what the heck was going on, which he didn't.

"I guess I'll wait outside"

"I'm staying here" Alex surprised even himself when his muffled voice reached his ears. Vict squeezed him harder. There was a pause and then Ben sighed audibly.

"Then I'll come back tomorrow with some clothes and something decent to eat for you both. You let me know if you need me" he said, apparently directing his words at Vict because the other boy began to nod.

"We will. Thanks Ben"

Alex waited until he heard the door clicking shut before dislodging himself from his hiding place. He took in a huge gulp of air while he tried to make his brain understand that this wasn't the right time to burst into tears. There was never a right time to be bursting into tears.

"Wanna tell what was that all about?" Alex shook his head.

"Not really" Vict ducked his head and grabbed Alex's chin to tilt his head up.

"Al..." Alex glanced briefly at him but averted his eyes just as quickly.

"I just don't want to talk to him right now" he confessed, feeling smaller than a little kid right now and a hundred times more vulnerable. Usually he was comfortable being vulnerable in front of Vict, if that made any sense at all seeing as Alex didn't like to feel vulnerable ever. In fact, beeing able to strip himself naked both figuratively and litterally in front of him was the base of their relationship, what allowed them to be together. But this was something he found he couldn't share with the other boy simply because the other boy didn't know anything about his past. His real past. It was as simple and as complicated as that.

"Is it about the car?" He must've interpreted Alex's silence as an affirmative because he kept talking "Ben has to be the most dedicated brother out there. Anyone who's only known him for a few minutes could already know that he'd do anything for you. He knows the crash wasn't your fault. He won't be mad"

Alex's eyes dampened against his will and his control was severely tested when a tear threatened to spill, but he looked up and away and was able to keep it from falling. Vict had no idea how much his words were rubbing salt in the wound right now. If Ben cared so much about him then why had he lied?

Alex gathered his control back and sent a fake smile Vict's way.

"When was the last time someone came check you were still awake?" Vict rolled his eyes at the obvious change of topic but said nothing about it. He reclined back into the bed with a small grimace before finding a comfortable position.

"About half an hour ago"

"Then you can sleep some before they come again"

"What will you be doing?" Vict asked, playing with the hem of Alex's shirt. The blond shrugged, feeling every one of his aches with the motion.

"Watch you sleep" Vict snorted.

"Psycho" Alex smiled.

"I know"

They stared at each other for a while until Vict finally relented and closed his eyes. He didn't have time to actually fall asleep when a nurse came into the room to check on him. They both new the problem wasn't keeping him awake right now, the problem would come later when Vict was actually tired enough to want to sleep for more than one hour straight.

Time went by funnily inside hospitals. It was always hard to tell the difference between night and day unless you were right next to a clock or next to a window, so he was surprised to notice it was already past midnight, almost one in the morning, when he looked into his phone which had miracolously survived the crash and still had some battery left. He wasn't surprised though to find himself physically tired but wide awake. He assumed at some point his body would want to just shut down for several hours but until that moment came, he was content with playing with Vict's fingers on his own and staying vigil at his bedside.

Little did he know that whatever peace they were enjoying now wasn't gonna last through the night as every time someone had to come in and wake Vict up, the other boy felt more and more restless and his headache spiked up so much he had to be lightly medicated even though the doctor was reluctant about giving a light sedative to a concussed patient. Vict's constant grimace of pain was enough to convince him.

Alex's hand hurt with how hard Vict was squeezing it, his grip so hard he could feel the older boy's rapidly beating pulse through the skin under his thumb. Still, he held on.

By the time morning came, Vict had vomited a total of three times and he'd had to be changed out of his gown at least once when he sweated through it. It was safe to asume Alex hadn't slept through the night either.

The reprieve came when the doctor making the morning rounds allowed Vict to sleep for periods of three hours instead of one and Vict was out like a light the moment the woman left the room.

Even though three hours sounded like heaven after the night they'd had, Alex couln't take advantage of the time as well as Vict was. He slept for maybe an hour before spurting awake with a more than stiff neck. He could barely move it. Thay's when he remembered he should have been taking the prescribed painkiller, which he hadn't thought of getting the night before.

With a heavy sigh and a heavy body, the blond lifted himself off his seat and limped out of the room. For not having anything wrong with his legs, walking with a stiff neck was proving to be slightly difficult.

He went to the hospital's own pharmacy and asked for the medication. He was glad his wallet had been safely inside his jean pocket and had been recovered from the crash along with him. He didn't want to have to call Ben for help right now.

As it was, he didn't know how he was going to face the older man now, or if he was ready to do so.

As it turned out, he didn't have to wait long to find out because Ben was already waiting inside Vict's room. Vict was still sleeping, so Alex considered walking back out and avoid confrontation, but Ben beat him to it.

"Alex"

. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .

"Not now" Ben didn't need to hear Alex's defeated tone to realize he was at the end of his rope.

The bruise on his cheek had blossomed to a deep red-purple color and he had dark bags under his eyes. He was moving stiffly and as he walked closer to the small table next to the bed, Ben saw him taking out a white pill from a small bottle and swallow it carefully. He swallowed the urge to ask about him because he knew what the answer would be, that he was fine.

"How's he doing?" Ben waited for an answer as he watched Alex studying Victor's face. He looked relieved to find him resting apparently peacefully.

"He had a rough night" Alex said, keeping his eyes locked on Victor and away from him.

"Looks like you had a rough night too" he ventured, hoping Alex could see the opening to share what he was feeling. No such luck though.

"I'm okay"

"Listen, Alex-"

"Not now" he almost snarled and Ben recoiled a bit at the venom behind the words and the hard look thrown his way.

"We're gonna have to talk about it eventually" he didn't want to insist because he knew how unreasonable his younger brother could get when he was angry, but he needed to make Alex understand what was really going on.

"Well, not now" the blond said again, this time signaling with a jerk of his head to the boy on the bed. He was still sleeping but Ben guessed Alex was right, they couldn't risk talking about it in front of Victor. He also knew there was nothing in the world that would make Alex leave the room right now, but Ben was afraid that the longer time went by without an explination, the harder it would be to gain back Alex's trust, something he'd worked so hard at getting and wouldn't let Ian's sudden reappearance screw up.

Ben understood he needed to respect Alex's space to process in order to do that.

"Fine. I brought you something so you can get changed and some of your loosest clothes for Vict. If they let him, I think he'll be more comfortable in them"

"Thanks" Alex answered somewhat dismissively.

"Have you eaten breakfast?"

"Not yet" Alex said, arching his eyebrows at him as if challenging him to say something about it. Ben didn't know what to say and didn't like traveling through uncharted waters when it came to Alex. He decided to be blunt.

"I'm gonna go, but you and I are gonna talk about things once he's released tomorrow, do you hear me?" he just hoped he wasn't making everything worse by it.

"Sure" the blond replied with a shrug as he started rummaging through the bag he had brought.

Ben felt a wave of anger at Alex's seemingly uninterested tone. After all, him getting blamed for Ian was as unfair as it could get, but he needed to remember that Alex's tone was only a testament of how bad the blond was handling things and that if there was anyone to blame, it certainly wasn't Alex.

Ben sighed and held back the instinct of reaching out with a hand to put it on Alex's shoulder. He was sure the blond wouldn't take kindly to that. He decided to go.

"Just make sure you rest some too. You look like death warmed over and you're not helping him any if you can't stay on your feet" at least he got a nod of confirmation that the message had been received. How much of it had actually gone through, he wasn't quite sure.

He left Alex sitting on a chair with his back to the door and his hand holding Victor's. The former spy and military man could use to his advantage the fact he knew where Alex was going to be for the next 48 hours. He had people to talk to and a crisis to solve. He wasn't gonna leave any stone unturned when it came to protecting his younger brother's life and emotional stability. That was his number one priority after all.

When his phone rang and he saw the name displayed on the screen, he sighed in relief. He could use some help and more people on his front right now. He hit the answer button.

. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .

Writing this chapter was more like therapeutic writing. I'm not sure how much it accomplished in making me feel better but I thought at least someone might like it. Any thoughts?