Disclaimer: Same as usual.

Author's Note: Holy. Crap. I feel like total poop. I'm so sorry. It's been almost a year since I updated. I guess I had to take knd of a break, cause I had no inspiration to continue this chapter because I had no idea what to do. Also, there's been the fact that my grandfather was ill but now he's on his way of healing (please take a moment to pray for him, it'll be appreciated by all of my family. Thanks!). I have no excuse that makes me sound innocent for ditching this for a year. Thanks to anyone who actually still enjoys and continues to read this story, and welcome to new readers! Enjoy this chapter that took me almost six months to finish! *Phew*. Also, a huge thanks to those who reviewed, favourited, followed, and special thanks to those who gave me plot bunnies, feedback, and ideas. They're all appreciated :)

Chapter Eighteen

In this chapter Fili is 14 and Kili is 9

"NO!"

"Excuse me?" Thorin raised an eyebrow, surprised at the sass his older nephew was showing to him. "What did you just say to me, young dwarfling?"

Fili huffed and crossed his arms defiantly. Everyone at this point knew never to say 'no' to Thorin Oakenshield. But Fili and Kili were both at that stage where they were both quite rebellious no matter what Thorin threatened them with.

"I said no!" Fili spat back, glaring.

Thorin glowered. "Fili, I will not tell you again." When Fili just continued glaring, he pinched the bridge of his nose in exasperation. "Fili. Do you really want to have this discussion right now?"

Fili dropped his gaze reluctantly and shook his head.

"That's what I thought. And apologize to Balin for being so rude while he's over."

"Sorry, Balin," Fili murmured, looking properly chastened.

Thorin shooed Fili upstairs telling him to be quiet and work. Kili had already gotten a taste of his fiery scolding, and had ran upstairs but Fili had stubbornly stayed behind.

"Oh, and Fili?"

Fili paused in going up the stairs.

"We originally planned to go take a walk outside after dinner. But you and your brother's behaviours were appalling. That walk is cancelled until tomorrow." Thorin glowered again when he caught Fili rolling his eyes and huffing before stomping upstairs.

"They're getting quite cheeky," Balin mused thoughtfully, lighting his pipe.

It was cold outside and Thorin had invited Balin inside after the older dwarf dropped off Fili and Kili after their lessons. Thorin threw some more wood into the fireplace when he saw that the fire was dying. "Aye," he sighed in reply. "They are." He threw himself onto the couch and lit up his own pipe, sticking it into his mouth. "I don't know what to do, Balin," he muttered around the pipe.

Balin raised an eyebrow. "You don't?"

Thorin sighed again. "Well, I do," he said reluctantly. "I should give them a good tanning."

"Aye. I recall that's what your father did to you whenever you got a wee bit cheeky."

Thorin flushed at the reminder.

"They're testing you, Thorin," Balin told him, smirking a bit around the pipe. "They want to see how far they can push you. When was the last time you spanked them good, Thorin? And I'm not talking about those little whacks that you give out when they get cheeky or mischievous."

"Erm ..." Thorin nibbled a bit on the end of the pipe. "I believe the last time I spanked them properly was quite a long time ago."

"Exactly." Balin pointed his pipe at the stairs over his shoulder. "They're testing you. They want your attention, Thorin. It's like food or water to them. They can't survive without it."

"I reckon I have been busy over the last few weeks," Thorin reckoned, staring into the fireplace. "Do you think I'm too harsh on them?"

"No." Balin gave a low chuckle. "You're never too harsh on them. You're never too weak on them either. You're a father figure to them, Thorin. They love you as if you were their real father. And Fili actually thinks of you as a father. He tries to do the things that he could not do with his father with you. In their eyes, Thorin, you are the only one left for them."

Thorin hummed. Balin's words were like a song. They flowed along beautifully. Lost in his thoughts, he did not even notice that Balin was putting out his pipe and putting on his cloak.

"Are you leaving?" he asked, distracted.

"Aye," Balin answered. "You seem busy enough with those two younglings without me bothering you." Balin smiled at Thorin, opening the door. "I'll see you and the lads tomorrow, Thorin."

Thorin waved to Balin goodbye before sighing and glancing up the stairs again, deep in thought. Perhaps he should visit his nephews and talk with them.

"Uncle Thorin's stupid!" Fili huffed to his younger brother, throwing himself onto the bed. "All he wants is us to do our homework!"

"Fee?" Kili asked quietly.

"What do you want, Kili?"

"Is that walk really cancelled?" Kili pouted.

"You heard?" Fili sat up, glaring. "You promised Uncle Thorin that you wouldn't eavesdrop anymore!" Normally he would have gone running to Thorin, yelling that Kili had eavesdropped again, but he was too cross at his uncle to do that.

"I didn't eavesdrop!" Kili said defensively, eyes flashing. "I just happened to hear."

Fili rolled his eyes. "Sure."

"So, anyway, is it cancelled?"

Fili gave a curt nod. Kili pouted and whined, "But Fee, I really, really, really, really wanted to go for that walk! It was the first time Uncle Thorin had time for us alone over the last few weeks!"

"I know, Kee," Fili sighed. "But Uncle Thorin said no."

"Uncle Thorin's mean," Kili huffed.

"Kili." Fili sat up straight. "What if we sneak out? We don't have to listen to Uncle Thorin!"

"Fee? Are you saying that we should sneak out?"

Fili just smirked.

"Fee?"

"What, Kili?"

Kili said timidly, "Unca Thor'n will be mad."

"Of course he'll be mad." Fili rolled his eyes. "I know that, Kili." He tried to keep the fear out of his voice. They were lost. Lost with a capital L. He and Kili were so dead. Thorin would be so mad. And everything was his fault.

"Fee?"

"What is it now, Kili?" Fili glanced around at his surroundings, but he still couldn't tell where they were. It was dark, the moon was high in the sky and they were still lost!

"Will we be lost forever, Fee?"

Fili bit his lip. "No," he said slowly. "I don't think so, at least not forever. Uncle Thorin will come soon. He'll find us, he always does."

"Maybe." Kili sounded doubtful and scared. "We shouldn't have sneaked out, Fee."

Fili remained stubbornly silent, before reluctantly muttering, "I suppose."

"But Uncle will find us, right? He always finds us," Kili rambled on, following Fili's footsteps tiredly. "Fee, I'm tired and hungry and sleepy. When is Uncle coming to find us?"

"Soon, Kee," Fili said. Or never, he thought wearily before sighing and pausing. "Kili?" He turned back, frowning. "Kili? Where'd you go?"

No answer.

"Kili, seriously! It's not funny anymore! Come out!"

"It certainly isn't funny, at all," a voice growled out.

Fili flinched. He recognized that tone and voice. "Hi, Uncle," he said weakly.

They were screwed.

There was no other word to describe what Thorin was feeling right now.

Fury.

He'd panicked when he had gone upstairs to check on his nephews - they had obviously both been sulking at the change of plans - only to find nothing but an open window and an empty room.

His heart had skipped a beat as he frantically threw on his cloak and rushed out of their house, searching for at least an hour before deciding to venture into the forest, heart pounding even more in anger and fear of what might have happened to them. The forest was strictly off limits, especially during the night, for his two nephews, and they knew that quite well.

"Uncle?"

Thorin let his I'm-extremely-angry-at-you-both-right-now look snap onto his face the moment his younger nephew spoke.

"We're sorry," Kili whispered, looking over his shoulder from the corner.

Thorin narrowed his eyes and twirled his finger, indicating that Kili was to turn around immediately. Kili slowly turned back, head dropped, but Thorin hadn't missed the unshed tears welling up in Kili's chocolate brown eyes. He sighed and pinched the bridge of his nose, trying to calm down.

They could have died. They could have been torn to shreds by some dangerous creature, or broken their neck by doing some reckless deed that only his nephews could achieve. He took a deep breath to calm himself down further before looking at Kili.

The young dwarfling's shoulders trembled as he cried softly, and Thorin sighed again. He had to get this over with, for both of their sakes.

"Kili," he said softly. "Come here, please."

Kili, head still bowed low, stumbled over to Thorin, vision obviously blurred by tears. When he arrived in front of Thorin, he cupped his nephew's cheeks in his large, calloused hands, affectionately and gently wiping away the tears.

"Tears, Kili? Already?" Thorin murmured softly, rubbing a thumb on Kili's cheek, knowing that it would comfort.

"'m sorry," the younger dwarf sniffled, swiftly clearing his eyes with his arm.

"I know," Thorin said sympathetically. "But we both know we have to do this, yeah?"

"We don't have to," Kili whined, looking up at Thorin with a trembling chin. "Please, uncle?"

Thorin gave an apologetic and fond smile and patted his knees. "Over my lap."

Pouting, Kili threw himself over his lap and hugged his leg, pressing his cheek on Thorin's thigh.

"You're being very good," Thorin soothed, stroking Kili's hair as he tugged down his trousers and pants in one swift move. "Let's get this over with, hmm?" Not waiting for an answer, he landed a firm smack.

"Owwww!" Kili whined, kicking out a bit.

Thorin didn't say anything, just letting his hand talk instead. When Kili began to cry softly again, Thorin inhaled sharply and prepared himself to speak. Whenever he was forced to discipline his nephews, it always broke his heart, but he did it for them. He had to. With those thoughts in mind, he forced himself to speak.

"Kili, why did you sneak out?"

"OWWW, Uncaaaaa! D-Don't you knoooowwww? Ow!"

"Getting cheeky, are we?" Thorin noted, swatting down again, grimacing a bit when Kili let out a loud wail.

"N-Noooo! Didn't m-mean to be cheeekyyyy!"

"Hmm, never mind that," Thorin said, continuing to swat down even as he spoke. "Answer the question, my little cub."

"I-I ... I f-forgot it!" Kili yelped when Thorin swatted down hard.

"Are you sure?" Thorin raised an eyebrow.

"Y-Yes, s-sir!" Kili sniffled, biting his bottom lip.

Thorin narrowed his eyes and swatted down hard, murmuring sternly, "Are you lying to me right now, little cub?"

Kili quivered and groaned. His bottom hurt. It burned, increasing whenever his uncle swatted down every now and then. "I-I didn't mean to," he sniffled. "Dinna mean to lie, Uncaaaaa. S-Sorry."

"Hmph."

"O-Ow," Kili sniffled, going limp. "I-I said sorry. P-pleeeeaaase, Uncaaaaa. I'm sorrrryyyy."

"Why did you sneak out?" Thorin asked once more, in a tone that clearly told him to answer or else.

Kili sniffled. "I-I ... Fili said so!" he wailed, feeling immensely guilty at the end.

"Hmm." Thorin stopped in spanking for a moment, and spoke softly. "Did Fili hold a dagger to your heart and tell you that you had to follow him? Did he force you to? If he threw himself off a cliff, would you do it too simply because your brother had too?"

Kili let out a sob. "N-Nuh uh," he whimpered. "A-And I know that it's all my f-fault and-"

He flinched when Thorin swatted down hard, scolding, "None of that, now. I know you must feel hugely guilty and horrible right now, but no going hard on yourself, little one. Aye, it was your fault as well, but Fili should have known better as well, as the oldest."

Kili saw Fili's head drop out of the corner of his eye. Was it possible to feel even guiltier? "S-Sorry," Kili whined to no one in particular. He was just sorry. There was no explanation for it. "I-I was sooooo dumb, Uncle. I know t-that I shouldn't have gone o-outside and ... and- OWWWWWW!"

"Kili." His uncle sighed. "What did I just say, Kili?"

"Ow, ow, ow," Kili sobbed. "Y-You said, n-not all my f-f-fault ... a-and ... n-no going hard o-on myself."

"Indeed," Thorin hummed. "Listen, little cub, we're almost done here now." To Kili's absolute dismay, Thorin continued to swat down. They were light smacks, but they still hurt. "I just need to know that you are truthfully sorry and why you're sorry."

"I-I'm sorry I made you worried! I'm s-sorry I snuck out! S-Sorry I put myself i-i-in danger! U-Uncle, pleeeeaaase!"

"Okay," Thorin soothed. "Alright. We're finished. Shh, little cub. Cuddles, now."

Kili continue wailing out apolgies as Thorin soothed him, hugging him tightly. After a few minutes had passed, Kili snuggled into his uncle's warm embrace, sniffling.

"Hey ... cub," Thorin said softly. "I'd love to cuddle more with you, but Fili's still waiting for his turn."

Kili whined and pouted.

"How about I make you two some hot chocolate after his turn, hmm?"

"And cookies," Kili said stubbornly after a pause. "And all the hugs I want."

"Of course," Thorin agreed with a small smile. "Now, how about you lay down on your front on the couch while you're waiting? Can you be good and do that?"

"U-Uh huh." Kili blinked blearily as Thorin moved him gently. "I can be the goodest, Uncle. Promise. I'll be the bestest."

Thorin grinned and said, "I know."

Kili after his bottom warming was just plain adorable, Thorin thought as he beckoned Fili with a crooked finger. He wasted no time in tugging his eldest nephew across his lap and pulling his trousers down.

"Comepletely. Unacceptable," Thorin growled as he landed a spank.

"Ow!"

"I can't believe that you could do something like that, Fili!"

"AHHH!"

"Not only making me worry," Thorin was scolding. "But also putting yourself and your little brother in danger?"

"AHHHHHH!"

"Unacceptable." Thorin shook his head disapprovingly. He knew that Fili was probably remorseful as hell right now, but he had to do this anyway. It was for Fili's own good. "What in the name of Durin were you thinking?"

"I-I just thought that it'd be okay t-to go out for a little walk," Fili answered meekly, tensing.

"Okay," Thorin echoed disbelievingly. "You thought it was okay? Fili, you could have been killed!"

"I-I know," Fili whimpered.

"What if I hadn't found you?" Thorin growled, not stopping his swats. "Hmm? What if you and Kili had been lost in that God forbidden forest? What if you had been kidnapped?"

"S-Sorryyyy! I wasn't t-thinking!" Fili wailed.

"No, you weren't," Thorin agreed sternly.

Fili began to sob and Thorin felt slightly bad for being so harsh on the lad. But he had to be firm. Fili had to know how dangerous that had been. But he figured he should at least finish up as quick as possible, so he wouldn't have a miserable sobbing little dwarfling on his lap.

"Fili," he said softly. "We're almost done here. Think you can do ten more swats?"

Fili just sobbed.

"Fili," Thorin repeated. "Ten more, yeah? Then no more."

"O-Okay," Fili whimpered.

Thorin landed the first smack and said, "One. That was for being foolish."

Smack!

"Two. For making me worry."

Smack!

"Three. For putting yourself in danger."

Smack!"

"Four. For putting Kili in danger."

Smack!

"Five. For disobedience."

Smack!"

"Six. For sneaking out."

Smack!

"Seven. For being bratty and arguing with me."

Smack!

"Eight. To make sure you never do it again."

Smack!

"Nine. For sneaking out through the window. You could have broken your neck.

SMACK!

"And ten. Because I love you," he finished tenderly, scooping up the sobbing dwarfling into his embrace, soothing him. "Shh," he hushed. "It's okay. I love you. I care you, and that's why I do this. You understand?"

"Uh huh," Fili whimpered.

Thorin gave a small smile and beckoned for Kili to join. After a few minutes of cuddling, Kili shifted and said, "Uncle?"

"Yes, cub?"

"Hot chocolate and cookies now?" he asked hopefully, looking up with his adorable chocolate brown eyes.

"Alright, scamp," Thorin smiled. "Go and wait for me in the kitchen." He watched Kili and Fili run off and he shook his head fondly.

Boys will be boys, he thought.

End of Chapter Eighteen

Author's Note: Well, finally. I'm really sorry if it didn't make up for waiting a year just for this chapter the equivalent of poop. (Trying not to swear here, lol). Reviews would be appreciated! Ideas are always welcome! The more ideas, the faster the update will be (hopefully). Thank you to all of you! Love you all!