Red Herring: Part 1

"Five! Four! Three! Two! One!"

Tick!

"YEAH!"

"WOOHOO!"

"ALRIGHT!"

Dipper, Mabel, Stan, Ford, Soos, Melody, Ryland, Wendy, and Waddles all stood together in the Mystery Shack's gift shop, watching as the time hit five o'clock, to which everyone then erupted into a series of various cheers. Everyone's eyes darted toward Wendy, who had both her fists raised in the air excitedly as she stepped forward to the center of the room.

"Five o'clock! And with that comes an end to my final shift at the Mystery Shack," she declared happily. "I am now officially…"

She reached down and unclipped her work ID from the front of her shirt before raising it in the air.

"...unemployed."

"WOO-HOO!" everyone else cheered.

"Hooray for unemployment!" Mabel shouted as she raised Waddles' little arms up in the air.

"Wow, what an odd thing to cheer about," Dipper admitted as he gave their celebration some thought.

"Soos, you've been an awesome co-worker, a great friend, and an even greater boss, and it's been an honor working for you these past few years," Wendy stated as she handed her ID over to him, which he accepted emotionally. "Also, I was absolutely the one stealing all your cereal bars in the back. Sorry, man."

"Heh, well, who could blame you?" he shrugged off carelessly. "They're delicious. You think I didn't take from Mr. Pines' Toffee Peanuts drawer when I worked for him?"

Stan's eyes bulged at this unheard confession. "Wait, you did what?!"

Soos' response and laid back reaction toward her own confession began to make Wendy grow slightly emotional herself. "Ah, man...I'm not gonna find another boss like you again, am I?"

"Haha, absolutely not," Soos bluntly told her. "But the Mystery Shack isn't gonna find another worker like you again."

"Soos, I know I liked to complain about work all the time, but let's be real, I hardly ever did anything around here. Like...ever."

"I know. And that's the charm this place will be missing," Soos told her. "Without you around here to do nothing, this place will always be missing something."

Ryland looked up and saw this as an opportunity. "I mean...I can do absolutely nothing around here instead if you want."

Soos glanced over at him, to which one could see he was visibly giving it thought. "Nah...it wouldn't be the same."

Ryland accepted his response but still felt slightly dejected. "It was worth a shot."

"You did what you could," Mabel said as she placed a supportive hand on his shoulder, prompting an affectionate smile from him.

Stan looked between Wendy and Soos and took a step forward as he casually held a can of Pitt Cola. "Well, as touching as this interaction you two got going on here is, let's not forget about the one who got ya this job in the first place."

"Grunkle Stan...c'mon!" Dipper whispered as he nudged Stan the arm.

"I've given you enough credit already, old man! What more do you want from me?" Wendy asked with a light chuckle.

"Nothing! I just serve to remind," Stan innocently claimed. "You're lucky I picked you up to work here. You could've ended up working for any other low life in town, but instead, you ended up working for this family of low lives. I just hope you're grateful."

Wendy chuckled yet again at his words, which she can't say she didn't expect from him. As snarky as she could be in response, she knew she owed him and everyone else her greatest sincerity.

"I'm forever grateful," she began as she looked around the room at everybody. "Seriously. You've all brought me adventure, amusement, love, and so much more that I wouldn't have ever expected to be gifted with at an ordinary gift shop job. But turns out you guys are all far from ordinary. Whatever job I get in the future won't bring me memories like the ones I've made here with you guys. Still, whatever the future brings, I'll know to make sure it includes all of you."

Despite the knowledge that Wendy wasn't actually leaving until the next morning, everyone in the room couldn't help but grow emotional by her words. And it was warranted, as seeing her officially leave the Mystery Shack was a major change that just further built up to the morning of her departure, and it was sad to see.

Soos was the most emotional, as he was visibly growing choked up, sniffling away as tears formed in his eyes. It was so obvious that Melody leaned over and handed him a tissue, which he tearfully and gratefully accepted.

Wendy took the whole thing in stride, putting the front that her departure was what she had always wanted and that it was a miracle she even had her job for as long as she did. But realistically, she was just as saddened to be leaving as the others were to see her go. But still, she embraced it, grabbing her own Pitt Cola can from the counter and raising it up in the air in cheers.

"And so...to this family of low lives!" she declared.

Everyone else simultaneously raised their own drinks in hand in honor. "To this family of low lives!"

"SQEE!" Waddles exclaimed directly after their cheers.

"And Waddles!" Mabel tacked on with the rise of her drink again.

Everyone else exchanged quick glances and shrugs before raising their drinks yet again. "And Waddles!"

"We love you, Wendy!" Soos shouted directly after, prompting yet another series of loud cheers for Wendy, which she humbly accepted, smiling and laughing the whole way through.

Some time passed in the evening and the light celebration had settled down into individual conversations, accompanied by plates of cake, which Abuelita had prepared and cut for the occasion.

In the corner of the gift shop, Wendy sat on her own, eating her own plate of cake as she looked around the gift shop, taking in the sight for what she knew would be her last time as a Gravity Falls resident. Soon enough, however, Dipper and Mabel began to approach her, with Waddles following behind.

"So how has the first half hour of unemployment been?" Dipper began jokingly.

Wendy smiled as she continued to look around the Shack reminiscently. "Still hard to think about. I've been working here for five years and it's the only job I've ever worked. I know it won't really be goodbye when I leave tomorrow, but still. Today feels like...I don't know...the end of an era...or something."

"Well, this still isn't really goodbye for the summer either, right?" Mabel asked. "You said you'll come back to visit later on."

"Of course. No changes there," Wendy nodded. "Still though, first real move and all, heading off to be on my own...still a lot of change going on. The norm's gonna be pretty different after this point."

"Well, at least you get to spend your last days of the norm with tears and chocolate cake!" Mabel claimed as she gestured toward the plate of cake in her hands. "The best combo!"

"I guess that's one way to look at it," Wendy said with an amused smile. "Though I gotta say, as emotional as all this farewell stuff is, it's kind of exhausting. This isn't even my final goodbye party."

"Whaaaaat?" Mabel said in disbelief. "You have another party after this?"

"But, you leave tomorrow morning, don't you? What do you even have planned?" Dipper asked.

"Yeah, my friends managed to set up a final going away party at Robbie's place for me later tonight," she explained as she picked her cake with her fork. "His parents are out of town for some sort of cemetery convention or whatever, so he invited a lot of the people we know from school and junk."

"Like...a college party?" Mabel asked curiously.

"Basically," she shrugged somewhat carelessly. "I'm kinda over the parties at this point honestly, but this one's for me and it's by my friends, so I can't not go."

"I mean, it's not like you have to either," Dipper claimed, subtly implying his distaste for Wendy's friends. Since he last confronted them at the cemetery, he hadn't been too fond of their definition of 'friendship'.

"It's the last time I'll get to spend with these guys before leaving, so even if I'm tired of parties at this point, I think I can sit this one through," Wendy reasoned.

Mabel leaned against the counter as her face visibly pondered a question that she wanted to ask. "So...what exactly happens at college parties?"

"Oh, just the usual chaos," Wendy casually answered without further detail as she examined her nails.

Mabel remained persistent, however. "What type of chaos?"

"Well, I mean, you guys have been to high school parties, right?" Wendy asked as she glanced between the two.

"Oh yeah! I've gone to one of my friends' sixteenth birthday party!" Mabel remembered. "Oh man, was that crazy! The three of us that showed up stayed over all night watching PG13 werewolf romance movies! It was so intense."

Wendy sat and stared at Mabel with a blank expression. She then looked over at Dipper and saw he didn't have an answer to provide for himself.

"Wait, have neither of you ever been to an actual party before?" she questioned in slight shock. "With tons of people who you don't know; all dancing to loud music, playing party games, making out in the empty corners, and unintentionally destroying the house?"

Dipper raised an eyebrow at her description. "Are you describing a party or a home invasion?"

"A party, man!" she said with a laugh as she punched him in the arm playfully. "It's a night of utter chaos and fun typically followed up by a morning of regret."

"Like how I felt after my night of Smile Dip at the convenience store?" Mabel asked before shuddering at the memory.

"Exactly!" Wendy nodded. "But that's only if you really push it, which I don't. Not anymore that is."

"Sounds terrifying, yet intriguing," Mabel said as she stroked her chin interestedly.

"I'm floored how you guys haven't even been to a real house party before," Wendy began, still processing the very fact. "You guys should come to the one at Robbie's place later then. High school kids usually aren't allowed at our college parties, but you guys can be an exception as my guests. It is being thrown for me after all."

At that moment, there was a beeping coming from Wendy's phone. She quickly checked it and verified it was a reminder alert.

"Speaking of which, I should probably get going so I can start getting ready," she said as she stood up from her seat at the counter, walking over to the front door to grab her coat. "But if you guys wanna come, then it's at Robbie's place at nine. You know...by the cemetery. And you're welcome to bring friends if you want. I'll catch you guys later." She opened the door and gave the twins a quick wave as she exited, closing the door behind her.

"Later Wendy!" the two waved back.

"You hear that, Dipper!" Mabel gasped as she grabbed Dipper by his shoulders and pulled her in front of him. "We get to experience our first college party as high schoolers!"

"Eh...I don't know, Mabel," Dipper said as he pulled away, rubbing his neck hesitantly. "I'm kind of also burnt out from parties this month if I'm being honest."

"Whaaaat? What do you have to be burnt out about?" Mabel asked, crossing her arms skeptically.

"Are you kidding? In this month alone, we had both the Summerween party and the Welcome Home party for Stan and Ford on back-to-back days. Not to mention how wrong both of them went," he reminded her. Suddenly, his eyes lit up as another thought ran through his mind. "Actually, have you noticed that? How just about every Gravity Falls party we get involved in, something weird always happens? There were the zombies, the lumberjack ghost, the love cologne...hell, even the day you were planning our thirteenth birthday party was when the weirdpocalypse started."

"Alright, maybe our party track record isn't exactly the most normal…" Mabel agreed. "...but c'mon! This is Wendy's party in the end. Don't you want to make the most out of the time we have left with her before she leaves?"

Thinking over it, Dipper only felt conflicted. "I guess...I don't know. I just have this bad feeling inside me like something is going to go wrong if we do go."

"It'll be fine, Dipper," she assured him. "If Wendy has gone to enough of these and the most chaotic thing she has to say about them is teens making out in the corners, then I think we'll be okay."

"I think the part about house destruction is a greater concern, but...you're probably right," he admitted. "There probably isn't anything to worry about."

"There ya go!" she cheered as she happily patted him on the back. "Anyway, I'm going to go see if Ryland wants to come along too!" She then gasped excitedly. "Maybe he'll want to make out in a corner!"

As she ran off to find Ryland, Dipper was left on his own with a disgusted look. "Okay, that is none of my business. Gross."

Despite Mabel's reassuring words, he still felt somewhat reluctant about going to the party. Even despite his party burnout, he was generally never a party guy to begin with. He'd take a night at home watching anything on TV over going to any party. The only thing that pushed him hard enough to go nonetheless was the fact that it truly was the last opportunity to hang out with Wendy before her departure from Gravity Falls. He already dreaded her leaving, so why would he miss out on a chance to hang out with her one last time?

So, he was settled on going. Thinking about how Mabel was going to try and bring Ryland along made him consider bringing someone himself since he didn't want to risk being a loner if she did plan on doing couple things with Ryland most of the night. Of course, his mind jumped to the best damage control for such a situation.

"Hmm...a house party at a funeral home," he said as he pulled his phone from his pocket. "Sounds like the type of thing Derrick would be into."

In the kitchen, Melody stood at the sink washing dishes. As her back was turned toward the doorway, she was unaware of Stan's entrance. He looked over at her as he finished taking a sip from his soda can.

"Hey...uh...Melody, is it?" he questioned as he approached her.

"Oh, yes! That's my name!" she nodded cheerily as she turned off the running sink water and directed her attention toward him. "Hello, Mr. Pines!

"So, I've been meaning to talk to ya about something," Stan started as he leaned over the inactive oven beside the doorway. "Soos tells me you manage the Shack's finances around here, right?"

"Yep! That's what I do," she said as she dried her hands with a paper towel. "Kind of crazy to think about considering how terrible I am at handling a cash register. But, somehow putting me in charge of all the money we have is a better idea than leaving me to handle the gift shop's earnings. Heh."

"I...what?" Stan asked with a confused stare. "Nevermind that. Just tell me this - has Soos been making more money as the boss around here than me? Just curious."

Melody glanced to the side, thinking about it. "Well-"

"Hey, Mr. Pines!"

"It's not a pride thing, I promise!" Stan shouted as he jumped up fearfully. However, he immediately settled down at the sight of Soos happily standing right behind him. "Oh. It's just Soos."

"I'm glad I caught you. I've actually been meaning to ask you something if that's okay," Soos said as his typical cheeriness began to dwindle down into a look of what seemed like concern.

"Well, you just startled a couple of years off of my life, so granted, you probably don't have long to ask," Stan nonchalantly replied.

"Heh, sorry about that," Soos replied with an awkward chuckle. "But seriously, I've just been wondering...how are you doing?"

Stan was somewhat addled by the question. At least by the way Soos had built up to it as if it was something vital. "Um...fine?"

"Are you sure?" Soos pushed further.

"Yeah? W-What is this? A trick question?" Stan asked, raising an eyebrow.

"No, no! Of course not!" Soos assured as he began nervously twirling his fingers around. "I was just wondering with all the weird stuff going on with you. You know...evil triangle stuck in your mind and stuff."

"Oh...that," Stan realized, looking somewhat unresolved. "Well, I mean, that's not completely fixed just yet. Still kind of a work in progress, I suppose."

"You're not gonna like...die, right?"

"Woah, what?" Stan replied, taken aback by the question. "No! I'm not gonna die! Well, I mean...I sure hope not."

"Well, I hope not too," Soos told him, looking apprehensive. "Because you see, I got a lot of stuff planned over the next month...like my wedding...and you know, I've been thinking about...a lot of things...and I just wanted to make sure that you're going to be alright."

"Well, I can't say I know that I'm going to be alright, but I guess I trust Ford enough to have all of this fixed up soon enough," Stan replied to the best of his own ability.

"That's good to hear," Soos said with a relieved thumbs-up. "Well, if there's anything I can do to help, just let me know. Nowadays, I may be Mr. Mystery on the outside, but I'm still a handyman at heart."

"Just worry about being Mr. Mystery for now, Soos," Stan dismissed. "Remember, those customers ain't gonna rip themselves off."

"Heheh, you got it!" Soos nodded as he walked out of the kitchen.

After Soos left, Stan took a moment to ponder over the words he gave him. He was more than aware of his current condition revolving around sharing his mind with Bill, but throughout the struggles and the general coping with the circumstances, he hadn't taken time to consider the possible threat to his own life that could arise. Not from the obvious scenario of Bill getting him killed from a takeover, but from the situation's longevity.

Was he truly at risk every passing second his mind was shared? Was he dying at that very moment? Could eliminating Bill from his mind potentially kill him too?

More and more questions began to form in his head that he became increasingly paranoid to the point where he wasn't even sure about anything anymore. Ford had been persistent about the idea of making a weapon to destroy Bill from his mind, but he had hardly gone over how it would actually work. Especially since they obtained all the necessary parts to make the weapon's power source, as they set out to do just days before.

Part of him had already felt that he didn't need to worry considering the amount of trust he placed in his brother. But still, the other part of him felt he needed to be sure about how everything was about to go.

"Ford, get your ass over here!" he called out from the kitchen as he turned his head toward the doorway.

It took a moment, but Ford eventually came rushing in to Stan's seemingly urgent call. "What is it, Stanley?"

"You see, I wasn't thinking about this before, but then Soos asked me a pretty valid question that I think I should redirect towards you," Stan began.

Ford's eyes glanced around the room, growing confused. "Um...okay?"

"Am I gonna die?"

Ford's eyes lit up suddenly by the question. "What the…?! From what?"

"From this whole Bill thing!" Stan answered. "Could I die? Will I die? Am I on a time limit or something here? What's really at stake?"

"Stanley, calm down," Ford ordered him as he placed his hands on his brother's shoulder in attempt to ease him. "Listen to me - you're not going to die. Everything is going to be okay."

"Are you sure?" Stan asked, not entirely convinced by his words.

"Yes, of course!" Ford confidently stated. "In fact, believe it or not, we're nearly finished with this whole thing."

"We are?"

"Come. I'll show you," Ford said as he redirected him out of the kitchen.

Down in the laboratory, the two brothers walked out of the elevator toward the back, past Ford's usual machinery and a tank of water where Berry the Snacken resided and watched the two. They then approached the back panel connected to the backroom, infamously known for where the portal used to be. Covering the glass that allowed one to look into the room was a drape, which Ford pulled to the side to show Stan, whose eyes widened as he looked through the glass.

Inside, he spotted a large amount of active machinery, which looked to be some sort of mini-refinery. In the middle of the room, there seemed to be a round pool of an orange substance which was being mixed and turned by a rotating anchor above it. The substance glowed brightly and the mix sparked a fair, but secure amount of electricity. Connected to the pool was another machine that looked to process and contain smaller amounts of the same substance.

"This is what I've been working on for the past few days," Ford stated.

"Woah...what is all of this?" Stan asked, having genuinely never noticed or even known about all of the machinery he looked at.

"I've been hard at work preparing the power source for the weapon we're using to safely eliminate Bill from your mind," Ford revealed. "All the anomalous pieces we've gathered from our adventure the other day have been placed into this refinery I've built, which is now generating the source of power needed to use the weapon."

"And how long has this thing been going?"

"Since last night. Prior to that, I was busy setting up the whole thing. I estimated it to take about thirty-six hours for the entire process to complete, and so it should be ready by tomorrow afternoon," Ford stated as he looked on at the refinery.

"Wow...really?" Stan asked in disbelief. "And then what? Is that everything we need?"

"Yep!" Ford happily nodded as he walked over to the corner of the room, picking up a large weapon from a counter. "As you can see here, Fiddleford already finished his work on remodeling the Quantum Destabilizer, which means all we need to do now is wait for the refinery to finish, and then we'll be able to get rid of Bill once and for all."

"And how is this all gonna work? Are you just gonna aim and shoot me in the head with that thing?" Stan asked, showing visible concern on his face.

"It requires a bit more precision than that," Ford said as he pointed out a corner of the room that had a chair with metal arm and leg straps. "You'll sit down in the designated seat over there and I'll safely align the Destabilizer with the side of your head, to which it'll fire a series of concentrated gamma rays, all of which will be amplified by our unique power source to be able to fire directly into your mindscape, which should slowly eliminate Bill from your mind over the course of an hour."

"An hour?!" Stan exclaimed. "You sure you're not gonna melt my brain with that thing? Aren't gamma rays like...bad for the human body or something?"

"When applied improperly, sure," Ford nodded. "But this weapon design ensures that the concentration of the rays aren't directly hitting you and are instead focusing on your mindscape thanks to what we've gathered to make the power source."

"This all just sounds like a load of fancy, sciencey-sounding bullcrap, but I'm gonna just take your word for it," Stan said, struggling to believe a single part of Ford's entire explanation for the whole process.

"Just trust me, Stanley. I've already inspected the gun and quadruple-checked the refinery before activation to ensure that no part of this procedure fails," Ford further guaranteed. "An hour strapped to that chair with the Destabilizer firing at your mind and you'll be back to normal. And the best part, we'll all finally be rid of Bill Cipher forever."

"Huh…it's that easy, ain't it?"

"Indeed," Ford nodded. "Well, if all goes to plan that is. Which, of course, it will."

"You're that confident?" Stan asked, raising an eyebrow.

"We've come this far, haven't we?" Ford reminded him as he began walking back toward the elevator. "Come on. As I said, it won't be ready until around tomorrow afternoon. Then, that's just about it. We're almost done, Stanley."

Stan still found it hard to fathom just how close he was to truly being free of Bill once and for all. Soon, he would no longer have to worry about himself doing crazy things out of his control or going into town or hurting anyone. He could roam around as freely as he desired and be content knowing that any crime he commits is truly his own fault.

Despite the fact that his condition hadn't been for more than a few weeks, it still like it had been much longer. As far as he was aware, this was the longest June of his life. And he was more than ready to go into July with a clean, demon-free mind in which he could partake in normal activities once again rather than confining himself to the Shack for the most part.

Soon, he'd be free again. Soon, he'd be entirely himself again.

And he smiled at the very thought. "Almost done indeed."

Later that evening around nine, Dipper had taken Soos' pickup to drive himself, Mabel, Derrick, and Ryland to the party at Robbie's house. Being a house party, none of the guys made much effort to change their usual outfit or appearance given the obvious lack of formality the occasion had. Mabel, of course, tried to make herself a bit more than presentable, but not necessarily overdone, as she sported a simple purple top with a matching headband with a large bow sticking out from the side.

The car ride itself had been relatively silent considering Mabel and Derrick's known disdain for one another. In an effort to prevent arguments and keep the peace, Dipper made sure to keep Derrick in the front passenger seat next to him while leaving his sister and Ryland to be content with one another in the backseat. Regardless, the bad blood the two had with each other simply resulted in neither really wishing to generally speak or converse, even if not with each other.

Although the silence was discomforting, Dipper would absolutely take it over constant bickering.

Squish.

"Hmph?" Ryland questioned as he looked down at his foot, which he had just positioned further under the driver's seat. As he pulled his foot away, he quickly realized what he had just set it on. "Welp, I just stepped on a piece of salami underneath the passenger seat."

"Awww! You should name it!" Mabel suggested as she pushed her cheeks together.

"Got an explanation for that, Dip?" Derrick asked as he looked over at him suspiciously.

"For the last time, this is Soos' pickup," Dipper clarified for him once again. "Any arbitrary pieces of food that you might find in this thing are of his ownership, not mine. That goes for the half-eaten burrito in the glove compartment, the unfinished box of Chinese food in the back pocket of my seat, and the untouched meatball sub in the trunk."

"Completely untouched?!" Mabel asked, eyes widening. "Is it still there? Pull over so I can get it out if so!"

"No."

"Aw…" Mabel moped as she looked down dejectedly. "Can you at least tell me what type of cheese it has?"

"I-I don't know! Provolone, I think?" Dipper assumed based on his very slight memory of the sub.

"Ugh! Nevermind," Mabel quickly changed her mind in disgust. "O-ver-ated."

Following her statement, a brief silence ensued, during which Ryland played her opinion on a loop through his mind, glancing at her several times as he thought about it.

"I like...provolone," he said as he subtly raised his hand.

"Aw, don't worry. You're valid," she told him sweetly as she patted his hand.

"Is this seriously what you guys are talking about?" Derrick asked, growing tired of the topic he had to overhear.

"Oh, please," Mabel rolled her eyes. "Like you're contributing to any of it,"

"I'm contributing by not adding to any of it," Derrick argued.

"Hey, you know what? You're actually right about that!" Mabel admitted with a smile of realization. "You are contributing that way!"

"Okay! Enough of that, now," Dipper quickly intervened before the bickering persisted. "Hey, Derrick, if you have a better topic, why don't you go ahead and share then?"

"I didn't say I had one," he responded. "I'm just saying, we're on our way to a kickass college party and the most interesting thing being talked about on our way there is provolone cheese. I figured there'd be some exchange of party stories or something more interesting."

"Great idea! How about you start us off?" Mabel asked as she sat back in her seat, crossing her arms with a continued look of amusement.

Derrick sighed annoyedly. "I didn't say that I have any."

His defeated sound prompted Mabel to snicker, to which Dipper rolled his eyes. "Mabel, it's not like we have any either."

"Oh, that's what you want to believe, Mr. Cologne," Mabel subtly reminded him.

"Mr. Cologne…" Ryland repeated as he thought it over. "Why does that sound familiar?"

"Uh...Hey Ryland!" Dipper nervously shouted in an attempt to drive attention away from the topic. "How about you, man? You got any party stories?"

"Eh, not really," he said with the light shrug of his arms.

"So we're all losers who haven't gone to a high school party before?" Mabel assumed. "Awesome! Look how much in common we all are! Except for Derrick, who I'm sure just doesn't go to be edgy."

"Is this edgy enough for you?" Derrick asked as he raised his middle finger at her in the backseat while continuing to look forward himself, to which Dipper quickly slapped his hand back down. "Ow!"

"Well, actually, I have been to one high school party," Ryland brought up. "Nothing worth going into though."

"Oh, well, you've already mentioned it, so now you gotta talk about it," Mabel told him.

"I, uh, don't think you'd want me to," Ryland claimed somewhat uncomfortably.

"Why's that?" Mabel asked with a light, confused chuckle.

"Because that was the night I had...my first kiss."

Mabel's amused smile instantly vanished at this revelation as she froze for a moment. After letting the thought completely pass through her mind, all she could do was stare forward wonderingly. "Oh."

Taking notice of the growing discomfort in the backseat, Derrick suddenly became interested, as he poked his head back in Ryland's direction. "Is that so?"

"Yeah, I kind of didn't want to mention that for...obvious reasons," Ryland stated as he briefly glanced back at Mabel.

"Pfft...whaaaaat?" Mabel said in a perky tone. "Why? Did you think I'd get jealous? Ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-haaaa..."

"I don't know…maybe a little...?"

"No! It's fine! I'm good, I promise!" she assured him. "I mean, come on, it's normal to have your past relationships. I've had mine too! It's not like you were my first kiss either!

"Right, I figured," Ryland nodded. "Just...ya know, it's still kind of awkward to talk about."

"Don't worry about it! Absolutely no awkwardness from me," Mabel said with a confident smile.

Ryland smiled back. "Alright, cool. Good to hear."

"Yep."

Despite there supposedly being "absolutely no awkwardness", yet another uncomfortable silence immediately ensued. Mabel and Ryland stared out separate windows, hardly daring to look at one another after such a topic.

"So, how was it?" Mabel indirectly asked.

Ryland turned his head toward her in confusion. "What?"

"You know...I mean, what was it like?" Mabel clarified, only glancing at him for a moment.

"Oh...it was okay, I guess," Ryland casually replied as he looked out the window again. "Happened during Spin The Bottle. It was with some girl I never really saw again. Nothing special."

"Mmmm…" Mabel said as she continued to stare forward herself. "Mine was when I was twelve. It was with a merman. It also wasn't anything special…"

"Cool."

Another silence occurred, somehow with even greater discomfort than before. Even Dipper felt somewhat uneasy from just listening in on everything, and he didn't even have to look back at Mabel to be able to tell how she was feeling.

Derrick, on the other hand, took a handful of popcorn from a bag he held and proceeded to stuff it into his mouth with amusement.

"Man, I'm so glad I found this unfinished bag of popcorn under the armrest," he said as he crammed yet another handful of popcorn into his mouth.

"Well, put that away," Dipper ordered as he snatched the bag from him and shoved it back under the armrest with a free hand. "We're coming up on the house now."

Dipper pulled up into a driveway packed with several other vehicles, all of which were surrounded by a field of gravestones of which belonged to the nearby cemetery of which the Valentino Funeral Home related to. As he parked, the four proceeded to exit the pickup and take a look at the exterior of the house. From outside, one could see the flashing party lights from the windows, as well as subtle movement, implying the house's activity, which seemed to clash with the house's naturally dark and dreary exterior aesthetic.

"Yep. That's about as fun as a funeral home has ever looked," Derrick noted.

"Imagine living here when there isn't a party. Must be depressing," Ryland claimed.

"Nah, I've met Robbie's parents. They seem genuinely happy with their livelihood," Mabel told him.

As they walked toward the house, Dipper glanced around at the surrounding cemetery with unease. He still partly had his paranoia about something going wrong at the party and the idea of another zombie attack wasn't off the table of potential possibilities. Of course, it would require him to actually summon the zombies for such attack to happen, but it's not like there weren't alternative ways for such paranormal events to occur. Under the circumstance that the entire graveyard rose up from the dead and attacked the house, he knew to set his focus on finding the nearest karaoke machine.

Though, he tried not to let such paranoid thoughts get the best of him. The last thing he wanted to do on Wendy's last night in town was spend the entire time anxiously expecting things to take a sudden turn.

"So what's the deal with this anyway?" Dipper asked as he as they stepped on the front porch and up to the front door. "They don't like having high school kids at these things?"

"Being in high school is a likely indication of being a minor, and so I'm pretty sure you can figure out the rest from there," Derrick briefly explained.

"Well, Wendy said we're her guests, so I think we should be in the clear regardless," Mabel reminded him.

Dipper did remember Wendy's word and so he hoped the same. As such, he knocked on the door and made sure it was loud enough to be heard under the thumping loud music that the four could hear and feel being played inside.

After a quick minute, the door unlocked and opened, and the four were greeted by the sight of Robbie himself, who scanned the four relatively quickly before his expression dropped into a look of utter annoyance.

"Ah, hell," he said as he realized who they were.

Not quite getting his cue, Mabel raised her hand and eagerly waved at him like she was his pal. "Hi, Robbie!"

"What are you pipsqueaks doing here?" Robbie asked aggressively.

"Pipsqueaks?" Derrick asked, raising an eyebrow. "How much older are you? Like two years?"

Dipper sighed. "Robbie, you know us and you know we're Wendy's friends. She invited us."

"Yeah, right!" Robbie gave an unbelieving chuckle. "To a college party? Get the hell out of here. This isn't a party for shrimps like you."

"Again, how much older is this guy?" Derrick asked the others.

"Dude, c'mon. Can you just get Wendy out for us?" Dipper asked, not in the mood to get into conflict with the likes of Robbie.

"How about...no?" Robbie refused. "For one, you guys shouldn't even be here. This is our going-away party for Wendy. You already had your time with her at your little get-together at the Mystery Shack. Second, I'm not obligated to respect you or your requests just because you're her friend."

"Hey, hi, Robbie! Remember me? Mabel Pines?" Mabel waved at him yet again, this time while aware of his attitude toward them. "The one who brought you happiness by getting you together with Tambry? I thought we had some sort of connection after all of that?"

"Oh, Tambry?" he questioned in a sarcastic mocking tone. "You mean the girl who constantly goes out of her way to make my life a living hell every second she gets? Oh, how could I forget about how you brought me together with her?"

"That's what I'm asking!" Mabel said, completely missing his sarcasm. "How could you forget the whole reason for us becoming friends in the first place?"

Robbie facepalmed at her obliviousness. "Look, none of you guys are coming in and that's that. So you squirts can either beat it or I'll get one of the jocks to kindly escort you out."

Ryland was hardly the type of guy to argue, even during unfair circumstances, and so he was settled on just caving into his requests. "This is a waste of time. We should probably just get going."

Dipper, on the other hand, had grown enough to the point where he knew just how tired he was of Robbie's belittling, especially after four years. Instead of backing down and turning back, he took his own commanding step forward, getting right in his face now that he shared the same height as him.

"No," Dipper refused as he stared Robbie down. "We're not children anymore, Robbie. You may still be older, but we're not obligated to respect you or a word you say. We're not going anywhere."

Mabel, Ryland, and Derrick were admittedly impressed by Dipper's sudden ability to stand up to him, and so was Robbie himself for a brief moment. But his words weren't brave or convincing enough to make him change his mind. Instead, he narrowed his eyes even more and took a step back into the house.

"Suit yourself," he said with a malicious smile as he turned his head back inside to call out for the jocks. "Hey- WENDY!"

"Robbie? What's going on?" Wendy questioned as she suddenly approached him at the door. "Who's ther- oh, hey, guys!"

"Hey Wendy!" the four teens casually greeted.

Wendy immediately shot a suspicious look at Robbie. "Were you trying to prevent them from coming inside?"

"What?! No!" Robbie quickly denied with an innocent chuckle. "Absolutely not."

"He absolutely was," Derrick immediately snitched. "I'm not even gonna lie and pretend to defend him. Hardly know the guy, so yeah, he tried to kick us away. We nearly caved in too. He deserves all the blame."

Everyone glanced over at Derrick with somewhat shocked expressions. Even Robbie was absolutely stunned by his shameless snitching on him. Derrick, however, just looked at everyone without a single ounce of regret.

"Anyway, I assume we're allowed in now?" he simply asked Wendy.

"Yeah, you guys just go on ahead," she nodded at them as she pointed back behind her at the party. "I'll meet you all in a sec."

The four casually walked right past the two and into the house, where they were met with the sight of several other young adults, many of which even Dipper and Mabel had never seen before, dancing and partying to the blaring music. As soon as they were far enough away, Wendy turned her attention back to Robbie and gave him a hard shove in the chest.

"The hell is your problem?!" she asked, incredibly irritated.

"My problem?! Why did you invite them? You know how people get about high schoolers at our parties!" Robbie asked as he rubbed his chest.

"They're my friends and this is the last night I'll get to spend with them before I leave tomorrow!" she argued back. "You think I care about most of the other kids you invited here? I don't even know half of them!"

"I just invited them to pack up the place!" he defended. "I'm taking advantage of having the house to myself!"

"Of course you are," Wendy said with an annoyed eye-roll.

"Look, you know how it is! If those guys step too far out of line and the cops get involved, we're all screwed!" he reminded her with a look of concern.

"Oh, grow a spine, Robbie," Wendy told bluntly. "You know these guys. They're not gonna do anything crazier than whatever most of these people you invited end up doing. Knowing you though, I know I have to tell you this: don't do anything stupid to try and get them in trouble. Got it?"

Robbie gave her a confused look. "Get them in trouble? What are you talking ab-"

"Got it?" Wendy repeated with a stern glare.

"Alright, I got it!" he fearfully replied with a slight flinch.

Wendy continued to glare at him for a good moment as she walked back before turning away and joining the others. Robbie stood at the door silently for a moment before letting out an annoyed sigh and closing the door. He knew better than to go against Wendy's wishes, especially at her goodbye party, but the idea of having the Pines kids and their friends around his house didn't sit right with him at all. Beyond his general lack of respect for them, he knew whenever they were around, something weird always happened.

While he wasn't about to disobey Wendy and get them in trouble, he certainly wasn't going to go the entire party without keeping a close eye on them and their actions.

Especially Dipper, for all the nerve that Robbie thought he had to get in his face the way he had a moment ago...

I didn't anticipate this one being as short as it was but as it turned out, it didn't really need to be much longer. Guess this could serve as a bit of a breather before things actually, ya know, actually.

And yes, I know I said in the last chapter that this episode was super important and it may not seem like it...yet. I know what I said, trust me.

Oh yeah, maybe some of you might've noticed but I redid the cover again. Same background and generally the same logo, but I redrew Dipper and Mabel. As someone who's not nearly as much an artist as I am a writer, I'm quite content with it, so I probably won't change it again for quite a while (even though the previous cover was already around for about a year anyway).

So yeah, I'll just leave it at that. Start putting on your curious hats and skepticles, and I'll see you all again next chapter.

-Absolute Rift