Chapter Twelve: Then and Now

One Year Ago - The Southern Air Temple

The air was cool, kissed with the promise of a pleasant fall evening. The moon would be full tonight, but here at the Temple, only two individuals would enjoy using its powers.

Aang had suggested bringing Katara here, just the two of them, after they had found out that Kanna was sick. Pakku had confided in the airbender that it was much worse than they thought, and Katara was heartbroken and distracted.

With promises that they would send news if anything were to happen, Hakoda and the others waved off the young couple as they rode on Appa to the Air Temple.

Katara had protested at first, but Kanna insisted that she go, not wanting her granddaughter to witness this slow, inevitable end.

Even now, Katara did not feel the cool breeze, nor the moon's effects as it rose in the sky in time with the dying sun.

She wanted, desperately, for something to distract her.

"Katara?"

She turned at Aang's voice. She saw the concern in his eyes and tried to ignore it, instead focusing on the waterskin he offered her.

"I thought you would want to waterbend, since it's a full moon," Aang said, moving to her side. He draped an arm around her shoulders.

Katara looked into her boyfriend's eyes. She knew why he was doing this- she could see the love in his eyes, but something was different, and had been since they had found out Kanna was sick. It had happened not long after Sokka's wedding, and ever since then, she had withdrawn from the airbender. Suddenly, their relationship wasn't what grounded her. It was as if life had burst their bubble and now reality was washing in, cold and unforgiving.

So when she studied him, she couldn't help but wonder- would they be able to survive this? They had survived a war together, but this- this was something she could not walk away easily from. Losing her mother left a scar on her heart, but the thought of losing her grandmother nearly brought her to her knees.

Aang had been so patient through all of this and had never wavered from her side. A part of her wanted to feel guilty, but a small voice in her head acknowledged that this is what friends did.

Was that it then?

Katara could remember how she felt after the war ended- hopeful, in love. She had had a purpose and was driven to help others, and now it felt as though that control was slipping through her fingers. Those feelings she had once felt so deeply seemed distant, and she longed to hold onto them, to feel something instead of the cold grip of dread in her heart.

"Katara?"

The waterbender all but lunged for him, grabbing his yellow robes and hauling him against her. She pressed her lips to his roughly, clinging to the warmth she felt there. When she began tugging more insistently at his clothes, Aang's hands gripped her wrists to stop her.

"Katara, what are you doing?" he asked, wide-eyed.

Here was the line they had not crossed yet- although it had been explored time and again. They knew each other's bodies well, intimately, but they had both agreed they were not ready yet to finish what they had started.

With that, Katara pressed closer. "What do you think?"

Aang groaned when her hand drifted down his stomach, then lower. "Are you sure?"

"Take me inside," Katara whispered, before kissing him again. She didn't crave words- didn't want them, and when Aang pulled her inside the temple, she was grateful for the distraction.

Ooo0ooO

Same Day - The Fire Nation Palace

The moon rose unnoticed in the Fire Nation. Inside the walls of the Fire Nation Palace, there was barely a whisper, since it was late and most of its inhabitants had gone to bed.

Amongst them was Mai, who was lying in Zuko's large bed wearing a smug smile and nothing else. The noblewoman had snuck in earlier, knowing Zuko had dismissed his advisors early so he could return to his rooms to meditate.

Zuko stood at the balcony doors, allowing the cool breeze to cool his heated skin. His arms were crossed over his bare chest, and a frown marred his lips.

"Come back to bed," Mai said in a raspy voice, turning on her side.

"In a minute," he replied. His gaze turned up towards the moon, which was full and blue.

"I haven't seen you much lately," Mai commented, idly smoothing the wrinkled sheets. "These treaty meetings have been taking up a lot of your time."

"They are important. Plus, I am spending time with my mother."

"She's been back for a while, Zuko, and not much has changed since then. Don't you want to spend time with me?"

Zuko didn't miss the challenge in her mild question. His jaw clenched. He turned back towards her, ignoring her when she pulled back the sheets to reveal her naked body.

"Mai, I won't keep having this conversation with you," Zuko said firmly. "My duties as Fire Lord come before anything else."

Mai sat up, narrowing her eyes. "I see. So all I am good for is a roll in the sheets when you have a spare minute, but nothing else?"

"Do not twist my words," Zuko warned.

"You promised me that things would be different!" she exclaimed, showing her temper briefly before standing to dress. "You promised, Zuko."

"I could ask you the same thing, Mai," Zuko returned coldly. "I know you are never around unless it suits you. This attitude doesn't suit you."

"This attitude," Mai repeated through gritted teeth. "So what do you suggest Zuko? What do you want?"

I want to go back to after the war, he nearly said. When I was certain about us, because now, I am not so sure.

"Mai, this is not going to work if you don't understand that my being Fire Lord is more important than-,"

"Me?" Mai cut in sharply.

When Zuko didn't respond, she scoffed. "You also promised that you wouldn't break up with me again. I guess you make a lot of promises you can't keep."

I didn't make that promise, he thought quietly, thinking of the day of his coronation.

When she stormed from his room, Zuko watched her go, trying to understand why he didn't feel regret or guilt.

Ooo0ooO

The Next Morning - The Southern Air Temple

A messenger hawk soared across the wide ocean, carrying a small letter bearing the seal of the Southern Water Tribe.

When Katara saw it flying towards her, her heart sank. She had woken up that morning feeling tired and a little sore, but it had all melted away when she had slipped out of bed and had looked down at Aang, who kept sleeping soundly.

There was no regret. No love, no happiness...just nothing. She had once had musings of how she would feel after making love for the first time, but now…

When she opened the letter, tears swam in her eyes.

Come home, was all that it said, in Sokka's hurried handwriting.

It would take her and Aang two days to return to the Southern Water Tribe. When they did, Katara left Aang the moment Appa landed and ran towards the healing hut where her grandmother was.

Later, Sokka would tell Aang that Kanna took a turn for the worse on the night of the full moon. Even with skilled healers from the Northern Water Tribe, Kanna's body was not strong enough to fight off the inevitable.

So for the next few hours, Katara would spend them with her grandmother, who tried to console her granddaughter. Aang sat with the other men in the main house, each looking lost and sad at what was to come.

And when the moon rose that night, it was followed by the deep, echoing sobs of a waterbender who beseeched the spirits to bring her grandmother back.

Ooo0ooO

Present Day- The Fire Nation Palace

Katara opened her eyes, her hand instinctively touching her moonstone pendant. It had been a while since she had dreamed of that horrible day and even now, her throat constricted.

She walked out of her room, wandering until she entered the Palace Garden. She sat next to the pond, watching the turtleducks swim through the lily pads.

"Katara dear?"

Katara looked up, and smiled softly. "Hello, Iroh."

The older general sat down next to her. "You had the look of someone far away. Do you want to talk about it?"

"I was thinking of Gran-gran," she whispered. "About the day she died."

"Grief finds us often when we are alone," Iroh nodded, folding his hands inside his sleeves.

"Does it still find you?" Katara glanced at him.

Iroh nodded again. "Oh, yes. Every year, I gather together a picnic and light a candle in honor of my son's birthday. I did it even during the war, because grief makes it hard to let go."

"I don't want to let her go," Katara blurted, touching her pendant protectively.

"You misunderstand me, my dear," Iroh said gently. "When we lose someone, letting them go does not mean we forget them. We let them go so we can remember them as we loved them. We let them go because they will always find a way back to us, even in the smallest of ways."

"Gran-gran told me she would always be with me," Katara confided. "Pakku gave me this necklace to remember her, since I gave away my mother's."

"It is beautiful," Iroh told her. He took her hand in his. "Sometimes when a love is so deep, so true, it can last in this life and the next."

"Like soulmates?" Katara asked, looking at him with wide eyes.

"Soulmates, friends, family. These bonds cannot be severed even in death. I believe that when you meet someone, and something about them seems familiar, it is because your souls recognize each other."

Katara turned her gaze back towards the pond. She lifted a hand and twisted the water up, allowing it to follow its motion. "Do you think something like that already exists?"

"Yes," Iroh said. "These things will find you in their own time, my dear, if you only open your heart to the possibility."

Katara bent the water continuously, not really thinking of the shapes she was making. It was Iroh who noticed two recurring shapes- the sun, then the moon.

Ooo0ooO

Zuko was stretching in the new sparring arena when Katara and Aang walked in. He studied them as they talked to each other.

"I was just asking Katara if she wanted to spar with waterbending," Aang said to him. "But I haven't sparred with my firebending in a long time. How about it, Sifu Hotman?"

"When am I going to get you guys to stop calling me that?" Zuko groused.

"Never," Katara said, smirking. "Plus, I want to use my sword. I'll find Sokka or Suki instead."

When she left them alone, Zuko was suddenly aware of what had changed between him and Katara, and how he was now facing off with her ex-boyfriend- who, like the others, was unaware of what was happening.

Shaking his head, Zuko began to stretch. "When was the last time you used your firebending?"

"A few weeks," Aang admitted. "I try to practice on my own, but when I'm travelling with Toph, she wants me to earthbend."

"Well, then let's start with the basics."

As they sparred, the tension between Zuko's shoulders gave way. It felt like old times, when it was just him and his friend, firebending then talking like they used to. There was an old, familiar comfort there, as it had been since Zuko's coronation, and even before that.

At the end of the day, Zuko and Aang left the sparring ring together, discussing strategy on tracking down Ozai and Azula.

Ooo0ooO

Disclaimer: I do not own ATLA or any of its characters.

Author's Note: "Some friendships are so strong, they can transcend lifetimes." - Avatar Roku

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