Every day is so wonderful
Then suddenly it's hard to breathe
Now and then I get insecure
From all the pain, I'm so ashamed
Beautiful-Katherine McPhee
When Julianne opens her eyes the next morning, the dread she felt the night before hasn't gone away. She slides her window open to breathe in some cool air to help with the nausea before going into the connected bathroom for a quick shower. Once she's dried off, she dresses in a white button-up and black vest and a red skirt that stops around her knees.
It takes so long to work a brush through her tangled hair that Julianne's almost afraid Elinor's already burning breakfast. That fear is proved wrong when she comes into the kitchen, Dustfinger and Gwin the only ones there. She can't help her sigh of relief as she walks over to the refrigerator and starts pulling out the necessary ingredients for omelets.
"You look pitiful," Dustfinger remarks, stealing a piece of bread and feeding it to Gwin. The little marten sits on the kitchen table and Julianne smiles, imagining Elinor's face if she walked in and saw Gwin. She loves that table and swears that it came from a monastery.
"And for that comment you've won yourself an empty stomach, Dusty." He smiles at the nickname, returning his attention to Gwin. "How'd you sleep?" He shrugs, not looking up, but Julianne can still see the dark circles under his eyes. He looks exhausted, like he hasn't had a good night of sleep in years. Hell, he probably hasn't in this world.
Julianne lowers her eyes back to the task at hand, pouring some eggs into a bowl with pieces of bacon, ham, and cheese, stirring the mixture before pouring it into a skillet. There's a vague memory that dances just out of her reach, a red-headed woman singing and swaying in front of a stove. Julianne isn't sure if it's real or just one she's conjured up from Mo's stories about her mom.
"That smells really good."
"Thanks," she says, quiet. When the eggs are nearly done, she gestures for Dustfinger to come over. "Come make sure the eggs don't burn while I start the toast." Dustfinger looks unsure when she passes him the spatula, poking at the eggs as though they might bite him. "You act like you've never cooked omelets before."
"I haven't. I normally stick to simple meals, especially since I've come to this world. My favorite thus far is called beanie weenies—they come in these little cans and they taste magnificent." Julianne snorts, deciding to cook his favorite meal for lunch alongside some macaroni and cheese.
A few minutes later finds the two of them sitting at the table and eating breakfast, Gwin enjoying a piece of toast Julianne had made specifically for him. They sit in comfortable silence, eating and daydreaming. It's peaceful until Elinor walks in and screeches when she catches sight of Gwin perched on her prized table.
"Get that animal off of my table!" Dustfinger quickly does as she says, nearly jumping ten feet in the air. Gwin hisses at her, unused to the strange old woman. "I'll have you know that the only animals welcome in my kitchen are flies and that's merely because I can't keep them out." Elinor is practically shaking by the time Dustfinger has Gwin outside, calmed down only by the smell of fresh bacon. She takes a suspicious bite of the omelet Julianne had set aside for her, her eyes widening in pleased shock afterwards. "Well, it appears you inherited your mother's ability to cook." Maybe if I keep feeding her, she'll pull the stick out of her butt.
"I'm glad you like it, Auntie," she says with a prim little smile. Mo joins them a few moments later and Meggie a few more after that.
"Where's Dustfinger," Meggie asks, looking around the kitchen as if she expects him to pop up at any time. Knowing Dustfinger, that's extremely possible. Julianne looks at her over the top of her book, sending her a wink as Elinor starts in about the marten on her table again.
"Have some more bacon, Aunt Elinor." Julianne slides the plate across the table. It does the trick, Elinor quieting down as she begins nibbling on the food.
"What do you want Dustfinger for, Meggs," Mo asks. He snatches the book out of Julianne's hand, sitting on it and nodding pointedly at the mug of what Elinor swears is cocoa sitting in front of her.
"No reason," Meggie shrugs. She scarfs down a slice of toast and some of the bitter cocoa before excusing herself and sprinting out to the backyard where Dustfinger is practicing with the tools of his trade. Julianne attempts to swallow some of her own cocoa, forcing it down with a wince.
"You should take a break from reading and go outside, maybe show Meggie that castle you used to explore." She laughs, picturing all the ghosts and monsters she used to imagine hid up there. Now they have real monsters though. Between Capricorn and taxes, she doesn't know what to do anymore.
"I have to memorize this poem for drama class," she says, snatching her book back. "If I don't, Mister Flanagan will have my head." Mo heaves out a sigh at her stubbornness, waving a piece of toast in front of her face until she takes a bite. "If I can finish the Hobbit in four weeks, then I can memorize a dang poem in two."
"It took you four weeks to finish that book?"
"Dyslexia and finals don't really encourage me to read for pleasure, Mo." He shrugs, taking the book back and walking off with it, knowing she'll follow him. They end up in the room next to the library that will serve as Mo's workshop. The room, like everywhere else in the house, is filled with books, the ones in here covering beetles, insects, and arachnids. The table Mo's expected to use is minuscule compared to the one back home.
"No," he grumbles to himself as he sets the book down on top of a glass display case. "This won't do at all." Julianne's nose crinkles at the musty smell of a room that's been closed up for too long. "Help me out, Juli?"
"Yeah, no problem." The workshop ends up having fewer spiders than the attic, but it's just as filthy. By the time they get it cleaned up and partially organized, Julianne is tired all over again. Mo swears under his breath, and both of them know this room won't do in the slightest if he really wants to get any work done on these books.
Meggie wanders into the room with her cheeks flushed a rosy pink, her smile replaced with a disgusted frown as she stares at the display cases filled with bugs pinned to cardboard. Meggie runs her hand over the spines of the books, packed tightly together on honey-colored shelves. She snatches the book of poems back out of Julianne's grasp, flipping through it with a vague interest. It's a collection of Edgar Allan Poe's works and has illustrations throughout the book that Julianne enjoys looking at.
"This room is much too small for me to get my work done," he says. "I'd prefer the attic, but I'm not fond of all those spiders."
"Just ask Elinor for a bigger room," Meggie suggests. Mo shakes his head and shrugs, sorting through the books on the table and trying to decide where to place them that Elinor won't have a fit about. "Why haven't you ever read aloud to me?" The question catches both adults off guard and Julianne finds herself unable to do anything except sit there, staring at her sister with her mouth hanging slightly open. Mo turns to face her abruptly, his dark brown eyes suspicious.
"You've been talking to Dustfinger, haven't you? What did he tell you?" Julianne isn't sure what shocks her more in that instant, Meggie's question or Mo's harsh tone.
"Nothing, Mo. I was just wondering, that's all." She hands the book back to Julianne before picking up another, skimming over whatever's on the page. Mo turns so his back is facing the girls, laying his tools out on the table carefully. It's obvious to both of them that Mo is distracted and upset because there's silence in place of whistling. Julianne's never wanted to hear him whistle The Bare Necessities so much in her life.
Meggie continues to stare at him, and Julianne continues to stare at Meggie. The dread she'd felt earlier comes back, nearly choking her with its strength. After what seems like forever, Mo finally turns to face them again, sitting on the edge of the small table.
"I just don't like reading aloud, it's uncomfortable for me and you know that." The tension in the room ratchets up a notch as Meggie opens her mouth with another question. Julianne rises and leaves the room before she has to hear it, suddenly feeling dizzy in the stuffy room. If I can just get some fresh air, I'll be fine. I'll be able to breathe, and breathing is good to clear the head.
She rushes past Elinor, nearly knocking the old woman down in her haste to get away. As she shoots out the back door, she crashes face first into Dustfinger's chest, both of them tumbling to the ground.
"God, sorry... I-I just, I had to..." She trails off as she realizes the position they're in, a blush warming her cheeks. "I'm sorry." She rolls off of him onto the grass, laying there for a moment to take in short, hitching breaths that do nothing for her.
"Are you alright, little bird?" There's worry in his tone when she can't answer him right away. She keeps her gaze focused on the clouds drifting past overhead, doing her best to breathe through the anxiety attack. She hasn't had one of these since high school and she can't remember the technique to calm her down.
Dustfinger
Dustfinger stares down at Julianne, unsure whether to leave her here long enough to fetch Silvertongue or to stay with her and shout for help. His mind tends to shut down in a crisis. Julianne's chest rises and falls rapidly, as if she can't get enough air in her lungs.
He's seen this before with his youngest daughter, Rosanna had been a year old and her breaths seemed to get stuck in her throat. His instincts kick in and he rolls up onto his knees, forcing Julianne into a sitting position to lean against his chest, rubbing her back in firm circles. It used to help Rosanna and now it's helping Julianne.
"Is that better," he asks, holding her closely as her breathing evens out.
"F-fine," she manages, resting her head on his chest. He tenses slightly, he hasn't been so close to someone in the nine years he's been here, but he allows the contact since Julianne obviously needs the comfort. Her scent drifts upwards to him, a mixture of vanilla and rose water. It's a nice scent, a far cry from his wife's smell of oranges.
"Good, just keep breathing." She nods, hair tickling his jaw. It's as dark as her father's and soft, hanging loose around her shoulders.
"Will you come explore with me?" Her voice is timid, a shy little bird afraid to venture out on her own. "There's this castle I'd like to visit again, but Mo doesn't like me going up there alone." Dustfinger thinks for a moment, deciding there's nothing for him to do for the rest of the day. He won't be busy until nightfall and that's still hours away.
"I'd love to." His answer seems to surprise Julianne, her shockingly blue eyes wide as she looks up at him. This close, he can see small flecks of gold in them, a striking difference. Capricorn's favorite stone is Lapis Lazuli, Dustfinger can see the allure that draws Capricorn in. He's having a problem not leaning in and drowning in those expressive eyes. He stands suddenly, bringing Julianne up with him. "What are we waiting for?"
She smiles, taking his hand and beginning to run.