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Chapter 13: Claire
"Of course I would," Ness smiled warmly. "What's the plan for activities, since she's, uh," she motioned with her eyes.
I smirked, rolling my eyes. "Ness, she's pregnant, not a nun."
"Well, you know what I mean," she shrugged and crossed her legs on our couch.
I pulled part of my cheek between my teeth. She had a point.
"Who else is going to be there?" Ness scrolled through her phone looking at Harley's Facebook wall.
"I think it's just going to be us," my eyebrows furrowed. I hadn't even thought of asking if I should invite anyone else. "She wanted things to be pretty low-key."
Harley had met Ness several times when she came to visit me at college. They weren't best friends, but they mutually spent time with me on multiple occasions and seemed to get along just fine.
"Ohh," she exclaimed as an idea popped into her head. "If it's just the three of us, and she would be nothing but bored in a bar, why don't we rent a cabin on Bainbridge? We can book it for the weekend and watch movies, eat snacks, anything she wants to do!"
I smiled and rolled the idea over in my head. "Be careful, Ness— I think your aunt Alice is rubbing off on you," I chuckled and began searching online.
"Sounds like you guys came up with a plan," Quil noted as he bounded through the back door, Jake tailing him.
"We still have to pitch it to Harley, but it's a start," I explained as he kissed my forehead.
"She'll love it no matter what you do," he reassured.
"Are you guys coming to the beach on Thursday?" Ness asked, looking to Quil and me.
I blinked, reading Quil's face that looked as if he was caught red-handed. "Well, are we, Quil?" I asked pointedly.
He paused for a moment, switching gazes from mine to Jake's then back to me.
"I'm sorry, Claire, I didn't think you would want to go if you were leaving Saturday morning," he admitted, rubbing the back of his neck. "Yeah, count us in."
Harley loved the cabin idea, almost as if it was exactly what she wanted. Maybe Nessie was tipped off by her aunt— but why would Alice Cullen be watching Harley?
The week leading up to her party was relatively quiet compared to the week before. No intruders, no late-night patrol calls, and no surprise engagement announcements. Quil was busy, constantly coming in and out of the house as he managed patrols, barely stopping to eat or sleep. Apparently, they were working on new drills and patrol routes.
"Is it because of me?" I asked him one night as he got ready for bed.
His body froze as if his veins filled with ice. After a moment he finally looked at me, his eyes watching my face carefully. "Just the trespasser. Jake is concerned that whoever it was could get into our border so easily, so he's paranoid," he sat down next to me on the bed.
"Have you seen or heard—"
He shook his head before I could finish. "We haven't seen him since."
I could see the concern and frustration behind his eyes. I pressed my palm against the side of his face and rubbed my thumb across his cheek. "Well, I feel safe when I'm with you."
A meager smile formed on his lips as he took my hand and kissed it. "I worry that I'm not enough to keep you safe," he confessed, his eyes drifting off, surely thinking about the night of the intruder.
"Hey," I called him back, squeezing his hand. "You're enough for me."
Quil was on edge. I didn't need him to tell me that. He barely ate, which was rare for a wolf who would typically down 4-5 hot dogs in one sitting. There were some nights where I would be woken by him getting out of bed to check the house for the millionth time. And if he was able to fall asleep I would soon feel him jolt awake as nightmares tormented his mind. It was disheartening to watch my partner struggle with me unable to do anything about it.
As Friday night got closer, I hoped that maybe a night on the beach was what Quil needed. A break from the patrols, the late-night inspections, the nightmares. He needed his brothers and probably a few beers.
"Do we need to bring anything?" I hollered from the bedroom as I dug in the closet, looking for something to wear.
"Jake said it was Paul's turn," he responded from the kitchen.
I pulled out a yellow sundress that wrapped around the front. It was getting warmer outside in the afternoons, I could wear a denim jacket when the sun went down.
"Is that what you're wearing?" he spooked me as he suddenly appeared in the doorway.
"Shit—" I gasped. "Yeah, do you think it's too dressy?"
"Well, more eyes will definitely be on you than me," he winked.
The nice thing about bonfires on the beach was that they were low-key. Pack members and imprints only. Mostly consisted of the boys playing football down by the waves while the girls sat around the fire and gossiped. When I was younger Nessie would play with me, building sandcastles and swimming in the waves before Quil would take me home at sunset. Now that I was of age, I joined the huddled women who would sip on small cans of seltzer or wine while discussing any drama from work or the tribes.
Ness hugged me when we trudged through the sand over to the fire pit. "I'm so glad you came," she smiled. She placed her hand on the side of my face, a vivid image of my first bonfire when I was five playing over in my mind. I had started crying because my sand pile was washed away by the waves, and just as Quil had turned in alert to see what was wrong, Ness had joined me in the sand, helping me pile it back up.
My heart clenched as she removed her hand, the warm, nostalgic glow filling my chest. I squeezed her hands as she walked me over to the logs that lined the pit.
"How is Quil doing?" she asked as if she already knew. We both glanced over as Quil watched me, hesitating before greeting Jake and Paul.
I sighed, there was so much to say. "I think he could be better," I murmured. It didn't matter how low I said it, I knew he would hear.
I didn't realize how much I missed this. The gorgeous sun that hung low over the water, the calming repetition of the waves crashing onto the beach, the feeling of the cool sand on my feet as the fire warmed my legs.
Down by the water, the boys had switched from throwing a football to arguing about something that Seth had brought up.
"That is not how I remember it," Embry scoffed, his arms folded over his chest.
"Ness? Would you come and clear something up for us?" Jake hollered, chuckling. They had each downed multiple beers by now and sounded like a herd of high school boys settling a bet.
She rolled her eyes at me, smiling. "Guess that's what I'm demoted to, huh?" she winked at me as she heaved herself off the log, treading down through the sand to the huddle.
Leah passed Ness on her way down, stopping at the cooler to rummage through it.
"How are you hanging in there?" she looked at me as she pulled a can out from the ice.
"Oh you know," I shrugged and shoved my feet deeper into the sand. "I feel bad," I blurted out.
I never really spoke to Leah about much. Perhaps it was because she wanted to distance herself from the female imprints, or maybe it was because she didn't really vibe with the gossip thing— not that I really did. Back in the day when we were part of Sam's pack, Kim was usually the ring leader with Rachel in tow since they were so close in age. Now that the packs were separated, it was typically Ness and I sitting on the logs. Until Embry, Seth, or Leah imprinted, it looked like it would stay that way for a while.
"Why?" Leah's face twisted in confusion as she sat down a few feet from me.
I shrugged and watched the embers. "I dunno, you guys are going through all this trouble because of me. I see what it's doing to Quil—"
I looked up at the group by the water. Ness's hand rested on Embry's temple while Jake and Seth watched eagerly to see who was right. Quil stood behind them as he finished his current beer.
"I feel so helpless," I clarified.
"Well, that's not your fault," she stated as she sipped her beer. "We've got it under control."
I admired her confidence. Leah was unwavering in almost everything she did. Me, on the other hand, questioned every move I made. I pulled my jacket over my shoulders as the ocean breeze coated my skin with goosebumps.
"I just wish I could reassure Quil that I'm fine," I grumbled as a commotion erupted down on the beach.
"I told you!" Jake and Quil laughed boisterously as Seth shook his head in disbelief.
"No way! Ness, you cheated!" he crossed his arms over his chest.
I smirked. This was the first time in a while I saw Quil laugh like that.
"It doesn't make sense to me," my eyebrows furrowed. The boys were still laughing and teasing Seth, their banter echoing off the trees.
"What doesn't?" Leah prodded as she tipped the can to her lips.
"Why would a vampire come to our house? I mean, maybe it was a mistake?" Nothing about it made sense to me as I rolled it over in my head for what felt like the millionth time. Jake couldn't find any trace of him, even though I could never get the image out of my head of the figure standing in the living room. He appeared only to be gone in an instant without killing me, what other reason would there be for him to break in?
Leah snorted at this, finishing her drink. "Probably the same reason he was here thirteen years ago," she muttered. I saw her face freeze, her eyes widening as my brain repeated what she said.
"Wha— what do you mean, he was here?" My stomach began to churn. I noticed then that the commotion down by the water had ceased, everyone's eyes were fixed on us.
"Leah!" Jake snarled.
I stood up from the log, the air around me felt thin as I tried to fill my lungs. "What are you saying?"
My muscles tensed as I heard the tinkling of glass on the pavement, the creaking of bent metal. "What are you talking about, Leah?" I begged for her to respond.
"I'm sorry, Claire— I—" she started, looking frantically between Jake and me as I backed away from the fire.
Jake with Seth and Embry in tow rushed up the bank toward us. Quil was frozen in place while his eyes were fixated on me; as if he wanted to help, but couldn't convince his body to cooperate.
"What did you say, Leah!?" Seth snapped as they gathered around us. Ness ran up behind them, stepped closer to me, holding out her arms.
"You knew!?" Bitterness squeezed my lungs as I looked around to all the faces, each conflicted on what to do.
Renesmee's face drew back as if she could feel the pain in my chest and the lump forming in my throat.
"Claire," Jacob tried to grab my attention as I continued to walk backward away from the group. "Let us explain—"
"Get away from me," I snapped, tears filling my eyes. I turned away from them, wrapping my arms around myself as I stormed down the beach as I heard a wolf snarl behind me.
"Quil— No!—" Jake commanded as my brown wolf charged up the beach to Leah, who phased defensively. My head whipped around in horror as Quil pounced on Leah, their figures wrestling as their roars and yelps filled the night air.
I didn't know for sure if I was heading in the right direction of the house, but I didn't care anymore. My legs kept throwing the next foot forward, stumbling over rocks and sticks on the forest floor.
I could no longer hear Quil and Leah tearing into each other, all I could make out was my ragged breath and my pulse beating in my ear. The woods were dark, the moon hidden behind clouds, the trees and bushes all blending together into walls around me.
Why would he lie to me? I fought the tears that threatened to spill over my cheeks, wiping them from my eyes as I stumbled over debris.
Why would he not tell me? I gasped as my foot broke through a branch, my arms swinging into the blackness to catch my balance.
Is he what caused the crash— who killed Mom? I stopped to catch my breath, squatting down low to the ground as my chest heaved.
I wanted to cry, scream, and throw up all at once. Since I could make memories, I never felt alone. Even when Mom died, Quil was always there, two steps behind me. Any time I was hurting, when girls at school made me feel unwanted, whenever I doubted myself, Quil made sure that I wouldn't go through it alone. And now—
A snapping sound deep in the trees behind me cracked in my ears like firecrackers. I stood up, my senses on high alert as I tried to peer through the blackness. My pulse slowed as my lungs tried to stop from making any noise.
If it's him, you're a goner no matter what you do, my brain reminded me. I swallowed and kept my head on a swivel, turning it at any potential noise.
My breath came in uneven, leaving my body as quietly as possible. You won't see him when he kills you, I assured myself. It'll be fast.
I heard bushes shifting, closer this time. Tears steadily streamed down my face now, I could see Quil as he wrapped his arm around me in his bed. I saw Mom in the mirror as she braided my hair.
I was ready to scream, even if I died maybe it would be enough to alert the pack.
A loud breath huffed warm air onto my neck and I choked on air as I whipped around.
"NO!" I yelled at him, his ears laying back on his head. "No, I don't want to see you," I couldn't make my body move as I wanted.
Quil whined, sitting down on his haunches, his tail tucked.
My chest and spine shuddered. "I don't want to see you," I repeated, my voice cracking this time.
His eyes closed as his head tilted down, away from me.
My body broke into tremors, my voice giving way to wails and sobs as I gasped for air. My knees gave out from under me as I crumpled into a heap at his paws.
He waited a moment before laying down, his face nuzzling me as I wept. Pushing my stubbornness aside, I curled into him, letting his warmth and comfort surround me in the dark.