Chapter 41: One Sweet Day (Mariah Carey ft. Boyz II Men)

"Thanks B."

I said as I checked my makeup and my hair for the tenth time before climbing out of the car. The moment that we were on the doorstep I could hear the yelling from inside, it was far cry from the night before. I gripped Britt's hand as I froze in place.

"It's going to be okay, Ana."

"How do you know?"

"I just do. You just need to have some faith."

"Why c-couldn't I just be like a normal funeral attendee?"

"Nothing about you is normal baby, you are exceptional." She leaned in and kissed my lips. Then her phone buzzed and she pulled away.

"Y-You can answer it."

She took her phone out and got a sad smile. Then she turned the phone so that I could see it.

Hey honey, just got to town. See you at the funeral tonight. Give my love to Santana!-Mom

Tears were in my eyes, it was amazing that her mom was showing up for me, a month after the death of her child.

"She's coming?"

"Yeah. She wanted to be here for you and me. Your family was there for her and she wants to show that kind of support. Dad...he's...he couldn't make it." She shrugged and I sensed that there was more to it but she wasn't sharing and I wasn't going to push.

There was another yell and I tensed up, I so didn't want to go in there.

My hands began to shake, I just needed something to take the edge off but there was no chance of that, well there was but I had been trying so fucking hard to resist. Britt had her hand on the doorknob when I frantically pulled at her arm...

"I h-have something w-with me and I need you to let me t-take it. Please?" I felt like I wanted to cry. "I h-haven't taken anything since...that day but right now...B."

She whipped around and stared hard at me.

"What do you have?" Did she think I had coke? Like...I'd never ask permission for that. Come on, B...know me a little better.

"In my p-purse. Side pocket. L-Low dose X-Xanax."

I expected a look of betrayal but she nodded and then dug in the bag that she had over her shoulder.

She patiently pulled out the little pack of pills I had stuffed in there, pulled out one and held it between us.

"The only way I can feel okay with you taking these is if you don't go looking for them yourself. So come to me, like you just did. Okay?" Then she put the rest of the pills in her pocket and patted it with a satisfied smile.

"Y-You're not mad?"

"Q told me that you had them after your seizure...they wanted to wean you off...she filled the prescription, did you think she wouldn't tell me?"

I shrugged, it wouldn't be the first time.

She handed me the pill and I swallowed it back before taking the water bottle she was handing me.

My heart felt like it was racing and my breathing still felt constricted. She smiled at me and placed her free hand on my chest.

"Breathe baby. It's just a panic attack. Just breathe through it, the pill will kick in and you'll relax...just think about Brenda...think about Ethan and Brendan. Think of Izzy and Dani...come on baby you have to breathe!" she now had me wrapped in her arms and was rocking me softly, singing that damned Lollipop song.

I closed my eyes and let my breathing slow as I listened to the silly song as the pill began to take the edge off.

After a few moments I could take a deep breath without feeling like my chest was going to cave in and I had my wife to thank for that.

Britt was still looking down at me waiting for me to give the go ahead as I wiped at my tears and prayed that my makeup wasn't ruined. Thank God for waterproof mascara!

I looked into her eyes and could see all the care and concern that she was feeling for me, my body tingled instead of trembling and the smile that followed was genuine.

"I love you." I said and she kissed me again.

"And I love you, through all of this. I've got your back as much or as little as you need. I'm here." I nodded, took a deep breath and squared my shoulders. I reached deep and pulled out my inner Sue Sylvester and then smiled.

"Okay, I'm ready." I said stepping past her and pushing the door open.

I wasn't going to let anyone bully me.

That was my job!

It wasn't hard finding my family this time because the yelling was even louder inside then it was on the front step.

I was passing the kitchen when I saw my nephews sitting with Mami, eating Popsicles. I poked my head in and Mami looked at me anxiously.

We were all on edge and I was hoping that I could reset everything today.

Enough was enough.

"Hey niños!" I said excitedly. Xavier waved at me and gave me his biggest smile. I looked at Evan and could see that the yelling was getting to him. His face was red and his eyes were puffy and swollen. Brenda had always tried to keep her boys in a peaceful environment and so all this yelling was not normal for them. "Where's Daniela?"

"I just put her down with Norah...the yelling got bad, I took her upstairs and put her to sleep. She's had a long day for a baby."

"Oh ok."

Mami got up from where she was sitting and came over to the doorway, she looked at me worriedly and then she pulled both Britt and me into a hug, pulling our ears close to her mouth in the process.

"Sal is here and Felicia is all wound up about everything. They are all in there fighting about the funeral arrangements and custody of the boys. Celia just got here with Quinn on top of that, so it's pretty tense in there. I'm taking the boys outside to walk in the orchard all of this is way too much for them. I was just waiting to see you, so you weren't going in there blind."

I nodded and kissed her cheek and could tell that Britt had mimicked me.

"Thanks Mami." I kissed her face and then turned to my wife. "B, go with Mami and the b-boys. I don't want you pulled into this. Y-You should also ch-check in on your mom."

"Are you sure?"

"Yes. I will call you if I need you."

Britt leaned in and kissed my cheek before pulling me into a hug. She was trying to hide it but I could feel her relief. I smiled as big as I could as I waited for the four of them to leave the house.

It was always easier to unleash my inner bitch when Mami and Britt weren't around.

Now I just needed to distract Q, so that we could have a family discussion without extra opinions.

I headed down the hallway and pushed open the double doors to the living room and stepped inside. All the yelling ceased and the attention was immediately on me. I spotted Sal sitting in the center of the room looking flustered.

Sandra was right by having me talk to him, because him here without me looked like it was driving him to quit. I couldn't have that. I walked straight over to him and he stood and wrapped his arms around me. As he held me against him, I could feel the tension in his body ease.

I don't think he had ever been so happy to see me.

"Th-hey beating you up, Sal?" I looked up at him with a smirk, completely ignoring my family.

"Yes. I thought you and Aden were a handful. Goodness. They are a tough bunch." he returned my smirk and then pulled me down to sit beside him.

I looked around at the open stares and grinned.

"So what's going on?"

A few moments ago everyone was at each other's throats but now they all looked hesitant.

How is it possible for me to have such a powerful role in my family? I think it definitely had something to do with my money and/or who my father was. My bet was on the money though, with my investments and assets I was now at a net worth of 100 million.

Buying a shares in Apple, Tesla and Bacardi had been smart of my father and when he transferred his shares to me unbeknownst to the family, my worth skyrocketed and kept growing. So while they knew I had a ton of money...I was glad that with the exception of Sandra and Sal, they didn't realize just how much I was worth. Britt didn't even know the full extent of my wealth.

Which was probably best, since throwing money around was a turn off for her.

Having the money, also made me nervous, I could send myself into the best drug high with it. It's why Sandra had control until I was 25...it's why I had safeguards to keep me from going off the deep end.

And I was becoming more aware of the fact that I was now than my father had ever been...the family valued that but me, I just wanted to hide from it because I was an addict. My mind kept going back to how much coke I could buy. I should be past those sorts of thoughts but in moments of stress...that's what I thought of.

I closed my eyes and then took a deep breath.

This was so overwhelming but I would control what I could.

I searched the room and saw Quinn standing in the far corner quietly going back and forth with Celia. Felicia sat just five feet away and kept staring at them with a look of disgust and huffing occasionally.

"Q?" I said loudly.

Her freshly colored, black hair whipped around and she looked at me with a huge smile on her face. I patted the cushion beside me and she nodded. Quinn had always been ballsy in a circumspect way but now...she was just willful. She leaned forward and kissed Celia quickly before strutting across the room and plopping down beside me.

"Hey San!" she said as she nudged my side and planted a kiss on my cheek. "I missed you." she said. Looking desperate to be anywhere else and I would definitely help with that.

"M-Missed you too." I mumbled truthfully, even though it had just been like a little over a day since I'd seen her. "C-Can you go up and ch-check on the b-baby for me?"

"Of course! Don't be too hard on them...okay?" she said before jumping to her feet and heading straight out of the door. I had given her a way out of this tense situation and she grabbed it with both hands.

I wished that I could go with her but because of my status in the family, I had to stay put and handle things that I felt were way too much for someone who was barely twenty but that didn't matter.

Not as much as my bank accounts did.

I knew that money equaled respect in my family so I made sure to hold my head up high and tried to smile. I pushed thoughts of Brenda to the forefront of my mind and went to speak but was immediately cut off.

"Why are you here?" Felicia said raising her voice to a fever pitch.

I was fed up. I was done with her bullshit and wanted to convey that without too much stuttering...but I knew that would be an uphill battle but without Mami or B, here to reign me in, I looked her straight in the eye and stared her down.

Even my sisters were silent as I prepared to tear down their mother.

"Listen and hear me clearly, you wench! You will not d-disrespect me." Her eyes got wide and she stared at her daughters for assistance but they just nodded in agreement, so I continued. "I don't give a flying f-fuck who you are! Wh-When was the last time that you even spoke to B-Brenda or saw those boys?"

"Excuse me?"

"You don't f-fucking know, do you? Brenda told me how you have al-always treated her boys as less than because their dad was black. She told me how you laughed wh-when she told you how E-Ethan was blown to pieces in Iraq. You are the one that doesn't f-fucking belong here!"

She looked gobsmacked and indignant. I slapped a smile back on my face, as I maintained eye contact. The Xanax was keeping me from completely losing my cool.

I was waiting for the room to erupt but it didn't, not at all, instead all that I could hear was crying from across the room.

When I looked over, I could see Mari crying in Sandra's arms and Celia was rubbing her back. Had I gone too far?

They hadn't attempted to defend their mother so I thought it was okay. I bit my lip, wondering what I should do next. Felicia was shaking in rage, I had hit a nerve and said things that no one else had the balls to and I was glad that my mother was out of earshot.

"Mentiras! All of it." Felicia finally said once she picked her jaw up off the floor.

I went to speak but was distracted by Sandra coming across the room, yanking Felicia to her feet and pulling her out into the hallway. Mari sat down across from me and wiped at her eyes. She looked hurt...it was like staring right at Brenda but I swallowed that feeling of utter listlessness and smiled politely at her.

"Sorry if I went too f-far." I said and she shook her head and reached for me, her hand holding tight to mine.

"What else did Brenda say?" I was surprised that she was asking me since that was her twin sister and they had always been the closest, had Brenda not shared this with her.

"She only talked about F-Felicia and how she hoped none of us would ever turn out to be a mother like her. S-She told me how she hoped that your future children got the side of you that was compassionate and nothing like your mom. She also said how she has come to look at my mom as more of a mother." Mari nodded in understanding, I knew that all of my sisters felt that way about my mom and I knew that she cared a hell of a lot for them too.

"When did you two have this talk?"

"After Papi's fu-funeral last year and th-then a little bit after Daniela. I didn't mean to hurt you Mari..."

"No...don't backpedal now, Ana. I'm not upset with you. I'm just asking because I have a tough decision to make here."

"What decision is there? Do one fu-funeral, it will just be easier on the b-boys. Evan is cr-cracking apart." I pleaded with my sisters. "I h-have never known him to be so br-broken. He lost his tw-twin just like you did Mari. We should get it all over with tonight. Th-Then come back and try to celebrate his b-birthday that we missed yesterday. B-Brenda wouldn't want any of this fighting. You know that!"

Mari nodded her head and looked around at everyone and they were nodding in agreement.

"That's settled then. We will just do everything tonight."

"Good."

"That was just the tip of the iceberg, what I'm talking about though is custody. Evan wants to go with you."

"What?" I was thrown for a loop. "Why?" This shocked me completely.

Mari sighed really heavy and fresh tears came to her eyes.

"It hurts for him to look at me. He cried when I tucked him in last night and he specifically requested to go to New York with you and if not you then Sandra."

"Um...ok...I have to..." All I could think about was rehab and relapses...how would this affect my nephews if they were with me?

"I'm not going to split them up, Ana."

I looked around the room, it was just Celia, Mari, Johnny and Sal. No extraness...and while I should wait for Sandra to come back, she's dealing with enough.

"I n-need to be honest about s-something."

Mari's eyes got wide.

"What?"

"I relapsed on M-Monday. I pl-plan to go to rehab when we g-get back. I d-don't think I'm the best for them. I also h-have Isaac in the hospital, a new baby and now rehab. I th-think those boys need attention that I can't give."

My sisters looked concerned now on top of their worry and I felt like shit for dropping that bomb on them.

"And Brittany knows?" Mari asked, looking in my eyes. "Are you on something now?" Her doctor voice coming out.

"Yes she kn-knows. I t-took Xanax. Low d-dose...I n-needed it today. Britt is h-holding them for me."

Mari nodded and then leaned in and kissed my face. "I'm proud of you for being truthful about all of this. We will have your back however you need. Okay? We can't lose another sister."

I dropped my head and wiped the fresh tears.

Celia and Mari wrapped me up in a hug, then we were all sitting again and wiping our faces.

How hard was this week?

Mari then looked over towards Johnny. "Will you and Sandra take them?" she asked, while fighting back her emotions.

"We would be more than happy to take them Mari, I'm not sure if we tell them why they can't go to Ana...but Sandra and I have discussed this and are prepared to take them."

"We will just tell him a version of the the truth, he's 11 and doesn't need the minutia. Just that Ana just had a baby and can't look after them but that she will still be close by."

"Of course." I said.

"It's settled then." She nodded and then pushed up from the couch. She headed towards the door looking tired but then looked over her shoulder at the occupants of the room and then her eyes landed on me.

"Ana...I know it's a lot to ask but can you please take care of this," she circled her finger around the room, "take it off my hands. You're right...I'm barely holding it together. I just want to bury our sister and her boys in peace."

I nodded and watched as she left the room. I looked around at who was remaining. Everyone looked tired or angry.

"Okay...familia. It has been a rough day. L-Let's eat and just enjoy each other. We didn't fly all this way to fight."

If the glee kids could see me now being the voice of reason, they would be shocked. I had definitely turned a corner in my maturity. Everyone in the room seemed to agree with me because they quickly dispersed towards the front of the house.

"So then she stumbles drunk into my room and falls into bed with me. I tried to resist but Quinn just has this growling thing...ugh!"

"I do not!" Quinn screeched.

I was laughing my ass off as I chilled with my sisters and cousins in the kitchen. After our big talk, more family showed up and thankfully didn't have to deal with what I did when I got there.

Everyone was off in different parts of the house filling each corner with laughter and stories. After ten minutes of the family unity Mari came out from hiding holding Daniela in her arms, I could hear the whining. I tucked into a kitchen barstool and began to feed her. The women in the room glanced my way and smile but then began pressing cookies for the kids to decorate when they came back and didn't pay me any mind.

Thank goodness. I hated being gawked at.

My cousins Demi, Paola and Tito were joking around with Celia wanting to know more about her mysterious girlfriend. She was currently telling them how her and Q hooked up, Quinn stayed quiet and began to crack eggs into a bowl.

"So Ana...you have slept with this girl too?" Demi asked. I froze and shot Quinn a look, not quite sure Celia even knew that tidbit. Quinn, kept her head down and began to beat the eggs furiously as her cheeks turned red.

When I saw my sisters raised eyebrow I knew that my inkling was right. Quinn wasn't offering any kind of assistance, instead she was acting like she wasn't even there.

"Um...yea we were kids th-though...not even in high school." I said trying to reassure my sister.

"Wow sis...I'm kind of shocked. At least you didn't hook up with Brittany, right, Q?" she said turning to Quinn.

Quinn still didn't lift her head...she flushed an even deeper shade of red and began to mix in the flour.

My wife and her fucking timing drives me so insane sometimes and this was definitely one of those moments. She had caught the tale end of Celia's comment.

"Oh we sure have, right Q?" Britt said as she bounced in the room with a sleeping Xavier on her shoulder. She came over and pecked me on the lips and then nudged Quinn's shoulder. "It was so last year you have nothing to worry about. We both had a little too much to drink. Anyway I'm going to go and lay him down...score you're making cookies!" she beamed and then left the room.

I looked over at Celia and she looked pale as she stared Quinn down. Celia was standing across the counter staring at me hard while Quinn stood there mixing her ingredients a little too roughly.

"Ceily...please don't be pissed. W-We are all in different p-places in our lives now." I looked down and brushed Daniela's little cheek.

"You know what, Ana, it explains so much. It explains the intimacy between you and Quinn. It's like you are closer than even you and your wife."

I pressed my lips together and tried not to look annoyed but I could tell that I wasn't doing such a good job.

"Me and Santana? Seriously? We would kill each other inside of a week!" Quinn laughed out as she looked incredulously at her girlfriend.

I looked over at Quinn with gratitude, happy that she finally said something and apparently it did the trick because Celia's face went back to a normal color and she didn't look like she was going to kill me.

"I know that you two aren't going to do anything and that I have nothing to worry about it, I guess it just makes me feel stupid. You three walking around...living together as if you haven't all hooked up with each other."

"Look it's not Ana's fault that I wasn't honest with you. She loves Brittany. She also fought hard for us to get back together." Quinn said as she rubbed Celia's back and kissed her lips. "I only have eyes for you baby, not San, Britt, or Rachel. Just you."

Celia looked over at me and stared for a long time. I tucked my boob away and began to burp Daniela softly. This conversation was just too much.

"Please don't be mad Celia." Britt said as she rested her chin on my shoulder. I felt her wrap her hands around my waist and then she kissed the side of my neck. "Ana only has eyes for me and I am totally committed to her now."

I felt the heat flood my cheeks and other places as she spoke against my neck. B had effectively steered my attention back away from such a touchy subject. Quinn saw me flushing and came and took Daniela from me.

"Um...why don't you two...go spend some time together while I spend some time with my baby girl here." Quinn made a face at Daniela and she smiled. It was the cutest thing in the world.

I was happy that Quinn was returning the favor of getting me out of the room.

I needed it.

Everyone went back to their tasks as Britt pulled me away for a make out session in the bathroom.

She pressed my body against the sink and kissed along my jaw and down my neck.

"Shit, I want you." I growled and she grinned at me then she rested her forehead against mine and stared deeply into my eyes.

"I want you so bad, Ana. After you promised me that this morning about sticking that strap on anywhere, I haven't been able to get it off my mind. I want to bend you over and...ugh." she leaned into me and nibbled my ear.

"Britt..." I whispered out.

"You want me, baby?"

"God yes!"

There was a loud knocking at the door that I was all set to ignore until I heard a squeaky little voice that effectively splashed cold water on all of my raging hormones.

"Titi Ana? I gotta go potty!" Fuck! It was Xavier awake from his nap.

Britt jumped back and straightened my jacket and wiping my smeared lipstick before opening the door.

Xavier stood there beaming. He pointed up at us and laughed.

"I tricked you! Ah ha!" then the little bum ran screaming. "Titi Ceily you owe me five dollars!"

He set us up!

So rude!

"Brenda Xiomara Lopez-Douglas, met her husband Ethan Douglas, when he was stationed in Puerto Rico. She was nineteen when they met and when she got serious about dating him she hid it from our mother until the day they ran off and eloped. He was then stationed in California so they moved with Ethan Jr. and Evan out to a place they had never been. Brenda was head over heels in love with her husband and her children; she also fiercely loved her sisters and nephews. She was on her way home from dropping Evan off at a friends house with her other three sons and was struck head on by a drunk driver. Brenda, Ethan Jr., and Brendan were killed instantly. Her second youngest Xavier was thrown from the car and landed in a bush. He was the only survivor. Brenda is survived by her two sons, Evan and Xavier. Our mother Felicia Nunez, her four sisters, Sandra, Celia, Damariz and Santana, two nephews, Johnny and Isaac and two nieces, Daniela and Norah. A host of cousins, in-laws, uncles and aunts. Today we come together to send them off with all the things that my sister loved the most, family, friends, stories and music. Our family asks that you please keep her sons in your prayers tonight. Thank you."

Sandra had always been the strongest of us that was of course, until it was her time to speak at the funeral so Celia stood up and took her place.

The night was truly filled with jokes, stories and so many hopes for Brenda's two remaining sons. We had intended to keep it closed casket even though all three of them just looked like they were sleeping but Evan begged us to let him see them all one last time.

How could we deny him that?

Xavier had ended up crying himself to sleep in Johnny's arms...he seemed to finally understand that his mom and brothers weren't coming back.

We allowed the rest of the family to go up to the front before us and then me and my three sisters, Celia holding Xavier, all of us surrounded Evan and walked with him to the front.

He stood stiffly in front of Brendan and brushed his fingers across his baby brother's face lightly as he sucked in a shaky breath. I bit the inside of my cheek and allowed the tears to run down my face but I wouldn't allow myself to cry out. Then we all touched Brendan at the same time and we bowed our heads as Evan said a little prayer for his baby brother.

My heart was hurting as we moved on to Ethan Jr.

Evan stood there staring at his own face lying there still. He covered his own face for a second as his body shook, I touched his back and he looked up at me with watery eyes. I nodded in understanding, keeping my hand on his back as he placed his hand on his twin's face and leaned over and kissed his forehead. He was whispering in his ear and then he placed his hand on his brother's chest over his heart and we all did the same while he choked through a prayer.

I felt like I was going to pass out when we finally made our way over towards Brenda. She had a ton of makeup caked on her face. Her hair was down but you could still see the scratches on the side of her face. She had taken the force of the impact.

It hurt so fucking much to see her laying there.

This time it was Damariz that stepped forward with Evan holding tight to her hand. She was talking to Brenda and then she was completely leaned over and sobbed against Brenda's chest. We surrounded Damariz closely and touched her and Brenda at the same time. I began to pray out loud for Brenda and the kids and for all of us.

I kept asking God to touch us all and stay with us through this hard time.

Things were really tense earlier back at the house but right now, the room was filled with nothing but love.

Brenda would have loved it.

When we stepped back towards the pews, the pastor closed the three caskets and made the sign of the cross. Evan stood there and just watched as they rolled his family and lined them up in a long row so that they could be carried out of the church. I was happy that I pushed my family to finish this tonight as I watched my nephew drop to his knees and cry into his hands.

"No, no, no...God please...no." Evan whispered as he cried. I walked over to him and pulled him to his feet and let him cry against me. I held him against me and refused to let go as his whole body shook.

At least I think it was just him that was shaking.

The pastor nodded towards us.

Johnny, Saul, Tio Manny, and Tio Eddie, Ethan's dad and our cousin Tito lined up on either side of Brenda's casket.

I knelt down and rubbed my hands up and down Evan's arms.

"We need you now, Ev...can you do this?"

He looked at me and nodded as he wiped his eyes.

"Yes, Titi...I can do it."

"Okay...go ahead then."

He nodded and headed over to the middle casket. He, Brittany, Titi Carla, and Celia stood on either side of Ethan Jr. and then finally Sandra and Demi stood beside little Brendan. I liked that everyone was falling into rank. My chest got tight as all at once the caskets were lifted and carried out of the church. Damariz and I held onto Xavier's hands following solemnly behind the caskets. With Saul and Mami following us, as they held the babies.

It was good to see everyone working together.

They had finally realized why we were all here.

Thank God!

The ride to the cemetery at sunset was insanely quiet. I took the opportunity to feed the baby as I laid my head on Britt's shoulder. I was so overwhelmed as I felt my eyes burning from all the tears.

We managed to get a plot next to Ethan so that Brenda could be buried next to her husband and children. It was in the center of the huge cemetery. It was fitting that we could put Brenda and Ethan back together.

This was all insanely tough so I was happy that I could at least be normal enough and calm enough to feed my baby.

Daniela was serving as a kind of sedative for me. I had to hold it together for her.

She needed me.

When we stepped out of the limo, I handed Daniela back to Mami as I walked Britt over to the casket and walked beside her as they carried the caskets over to the burial plots. Britt's whole face was red as she carried the casket. I watched her whole chest contracting as she choked back her tears. She had Evan on the opposite, side of her and she was trying not to break in front of him.

She had always been, happy Aunt B and she didn't want to show her emotions. She had spent way too much time around me because she was starting to build walls as high as a castle. I was just glad that they weren't with me or the family.

Small miracles were still at work.

Watching all three caskets being lowered into the ground at the same time was just an insane sight that I never wanted to see again.

I knew that Britt felt the same way.

After the burial everyone that could headed back to Brenda's house and for the repast, it was packed and this time the atmosphere was joyous and cordial.

Even Felicia was on her best behavior, for once. Halfway through the night, Johnny had to leave so he could meet his team. Damariz and Saul took it upon themselves to take the boys shopping for suitcases so that they could pack up stuff they wanted before they took the flight back to New York, the next day.

While they were gone, everyone rushed around decorating the house and making it look like a party. Britt had even gone out to get some gifts for them and then her and Sandra stood off to the side wrapping them with my cousins. Brenda would be so thrilled to see all of us pulling together to celebrate Evan. Once again even Felicia, laughed and participated.

I swear it was like being in the fucking twilight zone watching her laugh and joke with Quinn and Celia.

Whatever Sandra had said to her in that hallway, earlier must have really done the trick because she didn't have one off side glance or anything! Maybe she realized that this was about the boys now and keeping them happy and stable. Their whole lives had just changed.

Things were definitely about to be shaken up for them.

We needed to all be in their corners, including Felicia.

I was going to make sure of that!

"Surprise!" the room sang out as Evan walked into the dining room.

Evan looked around and then his eyes landed on me and the corners of his mouth lifted slightly as tears came to his eyes. It was bittersweet but I knew when I saw a little bit of light come back to his eyes as he looked at me, that we had done the right thing.

"Thank you!" Evan said as he flung himself at me. He was fair though, he went around the room and hugged and kissed everyone.

After Evan made it back over to me, we started to sing to him and then passed around presents as I cut the cake that Quinn had made earlier.

For that moment in time, we all forgot the painful evening that we had just had and we celebrated Evan and Xavier.

It was what they needed and in some way, it was what we all needed too.

After the house had cleared out late Friday night it was just the sisters and Britt. Mami had taken my uncles back to the hotel. I was letting them have it for the weekend. We were sitting around, me trying to book a million flights for the next morning when Felicia finally decided to speak up.

"So, Celia, are you serious about this girl?"

Ceily looked shocked but held tight to Q's hand.

"Absolutely, I just finished fixing up my place in Brooklyn and...I was hoping to ask Quinn here," she squeezed Q's hand. "to move in with me."

Quinn's face lit up as she looked at my sister. "Of course, baby!" she said as she wrapped her arms around Ceily and kissed her senseless.

Felicia didn't flinch as she looked on. She just nodded and said to Quinn.

"I like you for my daughter," then she looked at Celia and smiled. "She's a keeper...don't mess it up!"

We returned to the hotel late that night and didn't plan on sleeping very much. Mami took the baby to her room for the night because she was returning to Lima the next morning and wanted to spend as much time as she could especially since Britt and I had an early flight. The chartered plane was leaving at a little after six and we were not going to be late this time. We were just planning on sleeping on the plane.

A whole group of us would be heading to the airport around the same time, this time it would be Damariz, Saul, baby Norah, Sandra, the boys, Celia, Quinn and then me, Britt and Daniela. It was going to be a packed plane and so we were all trying to get ourselves ready so that we could all be there on time.

We had to stay awake.

I was still feeling antsy and shaky as we packed our bags.

"Are you hungry, Ana?"

"No...not really." I smiled as we walked hand in hand towards the suite. My uncles and cousins, headed out right out after the funeral and Quinn was staying in Celia's room, so it was just us.

"Too bad."

She whispered as she shut the door behind me and pushed me up against it.

"How can you be in the m-mood?" I asked as she nipped at my bottom lip.

"You don't want me?" she asked as she kissed my neck. "When's the next time we get alone time like this, babe?" she said as she began to peel off my jacket.

"Um...uh." I felt like a teenage boy...all the blood rushed from my head straight to my clit. I was on fire.

"Tell me to stop and I will." she mumbled as she sucked on my neck and continued to undress me.

"Uh, uh...oh...shit..." Britt had moved quickly as she hoisted me up so that I had my legs around her waist.

"How about a shower?" she mumbled as she walked us into the bedroom.

I was lost in her kisses as I clung to her and kissed her back.

She was able to navigate us to the bathroom without injury and before I knew what was happening, I was naked and pressed against the cold tile.

"I need you, B." I moaned as she sucked on my breasts lightly. "That feels so good!" I had been worried that after breastfeeding this would be awkward but it felt so different.

She dropped to her knees and lifted me so that both my legs were thrown over her shoulders.

It was like the first time all over again.

My body was shaking uncontrollably as she sucked my clit into her mouth.

"Oh God! Britt! Just like that! Fuck!" I squealed out.

I pressed my hands to the back of her head and pulled her as close to my body as possible. Her head bobbed as she sucked and licked at me. I was teetering on the edge of an orgasm when she shoved her fingers deep inside of me.

"Ay! Brittany!" I kept chanting as she pounded into me over and over again. "I'm soooo...ahhhh...God...right there!"

I came hard, my body shaking as I gave in to her touch.

As I stood there catching my breath, Britt slowly washed my body. I was like a rag doll as she massaged my muscles and then began to make her way back down to the throbbing in between my legs.

"You're really wet, Ana."

"Yea...it's w-what you do to me."

"Yea?" she said as she pressed me against the wall again. I nodded as I sucked her lip in my mouth and wormed my hand down to touch her. She trembled and dropped her forehead against mine. "Oh God...Ana I want you so bad."

"Your wish is my command."

We rocked on our feet as we came together, over and over again.

The water was ice cold when we finally made it out of the shower.

I was a different person as I made my way into the bedroom and began to lotion my body and get ready for the day. Britt and I were going to be returning to New York more united.

Every time our eyes met it was like we were schoolgirls again, it was like that first time we had seen each other.

"I love you so fucking m-much, B." I said as I leaned up and met her lips.

"I love you too, Ana banana...so fucking much!" she said as she nibbled on my lip.

We ended up back in bed until it was time to leave.

It was a great way to end a heavy weekend.

Brittany had managed to take the darkest thoughts and deepest cravings and push them completely from my mind.

As the flight took off back home, toward rehab and Cancer...I held fast to Britt's hand and knew that no matter what was coming my way...everything would be alright.