all was golden when the day met the night

The truth is, Kakashi really doesn't know the boy. He hasn't paid him an ounce of attention since he was still in ANBU and part of the guard rotation for his protection. So, of course he doesn't know anything about him, except for two things: he is the son of Minato and Kushina, and he is the Kyuubi's jailer. And those two factors are the entire reason Kakashi has avoided him up until this point. He'd been half tempted to fail him just so that he wouldn't have to see his face every day, so he wouldn't be reminded of the couple who'd taken him in and cared for him despite how indifferent he'd pretended to be.

But then he watches the Kyuubi's container mutilate his own hand, watches him rescue Kakashi, watches him tell anybody with ears that he will surpass every single Hokage.

He can't help but hope that dream comes true, just to spite the odds.

/

Kakashi fails.

He fails to teach the Uchiha his most important lesson, and in doing so also fails his sensei's son. A part of him wonders if he didn't do it on purpose. A part of him wonders why he can't stand to really look at the vengeful boy, though he looks nothing and acts nothing like Obito.

Perhaps it's because of those things.

And then he thinks of bright eyes and laughter and unorthodox methods that always seem to work. He thinks back to that first team meeting and hates himself a little more. Why invest so much time into a boy who clearly doesn't appreciate it, when he would rather be investing his time in a boy that smiles no matter what he's feeling?

He's screwed. How can he ever be forgiven, when all he's done is let prejudice and misplaced hate drive him away from the last living connection to his old life?

/

Fifteen years old, but he's changed so much in those two and a half years. Kakashi could weep.

All he's done is fail this boy, a boy who's still kindhearted enough to bring Kakashi a gift. Why? What possessed this boy to care about him when all Kakashi's done is earn his anger? Earned it, but rarely received it. Why?

But his parents were kind hearted, too, and Kakashi has to remind himself, once again, that this boy-young man-is not the Kyuubi. He is not the Kyuubi, he only houses it, and Kakashi thinks someday, he will be able to become stronger than any shinobi ever.

/

It hits him in the middle of a battlefield during the war: he loves the boy. Young man. Naruto.

He loves Naruto.

Maybe it would make more sense for him to love Naruto as a brother would, perhaps even a father, but that doesn't turn out to be the case. He catches sight of Naruto in sage mode, taking on too many enemies to count, and he thinks he's beautiful.

Because he is. There's no doubt in Kakashi's mind, Naruto is beautiful, on the outside, but on the inside as well. How can somebody who carried the hatred of his entire village for years turn out to be so kind, and good, and beautiful?

But Naruto wears his heart for everybody to see, wears it like a shield, and it works. How many times has he saved the day by simply talking, by showing people that good things do exist, that you can always find happiness?

Precious, he thinks, and his whole body hums with the truth of it.

/

Kakashi always thought he'd be happy to die for the sake of his village. He always thought he'd be okay with it, that it would end painfully, but quickly, and he would know nothing.

He hadn't expected to be stranded in a cave with wounds that won't heal and half a ration bar away from starvation when he died. He hadn't expected to face his demise because he got caught in a storm after a mission gone bad with wounds that are only fatal because they've gone untreated for too long.

He hadn't expected to have so much time to think about the regrets that have piled up in his heart, and no way to make up for them.

But his breathing has slowed with his heart-rate to the point that it's almost like neither are happening at all, and

Oh. Is this what it feels like? I feel no pain...

Bright light fills his vision, white and pure and clean, and Kakashi falls unconscious, succumbing to the darkness that closes in.

/

Kakashi wakes, the beeping of a heart monitor the first thing he hears. But then, footsteps in the hall, the rain against the window pane, and the steady breathing of somebody to his right.

He opens his eyes.

Naruto sits with his chin in hand, elbow on the edge of Kakashi's bed, eyes turned toward a sky that's dark with thick grey clouds, the kind that follow a heavy storm.

And he remembers. He remembers those last moments before he'd passed out, and the bright beam of a flashlight blocking his vision, and then blue eyes. He hadn't been able to make out what Naruto was saying as he fell unconscious, but Kakashi is alive, so he supposes he can simply ask.

He shifts under scratchy sheets, and those eyes land on him immediately.

"Kakashi," Naruto whispers. "Don't sit up, you'll hurt yourself."

"What did you say?" he manages, though his mouth feels like cotton. "When you found me?"

Naruto blinks. "Your name. And I told you not to leave me. I used nature chakra to heal the worst of it, but you were also suffering from chakra exhaustion, and there isn't a lot I could do about that, so I brought you home."

Kakashi hums. "Naruto."

"What?"

"Thank you."

/

When he wakes again several hours later, Naruto is still seated by his side, though he's writing out what looks like a mission report. His eyes land on Kakashi after a moment and a smile flits across his face.

"Did you know you talk in your sleep?"

Kakashi hums without giving an answer, because no, he hadn't. Why does Naruto grin like the cat that swallowed the canary?

"I'm not surprised you didn't know, you so rarely fall into a deep sleep around others."

It's true, he doesn't. He's a ninja, he's been trained to sleep lightly since before he could walk without toddling. But what could he have possibly said to make Naruto look like that?

A moment passes where Naruto just watches him, and then his expression softens. "It's true, too, isn't it? You really love me, Kakashi?"

Why aren't you panicking? Why aren't I panicking?

"Yes." Just a whisper. It's all he can force out of his mouth.

But Naruto smiles. "That's good," he says, and he rolls up the scroll he'd been writing in. "And you know something?"

He hums.

"I love you too."