Prompt- Kissing Scars
The story, where Duke admires the scar that Nathan has from something heroic that he did three years ago.
AU- no Troubles and Duke and Nathan have been together for quite some time and had a fairly well established relationship at this point in time.
"You're doing it again Duke," Nathan said with a slightly annoyed smile as he shifted slightly, propping himself up on the pile of pillows that were scattered on the oversized bed. Blue eyes shone brightly as they locked onto those deep brown orbs as they lifted to meet his, watching the man before him blush slightly.
"Sorry," Duke said as he leaned in and gently kissed the side of Nathan's neck softly, nuzzling against him. "You know I can't help it..."
Nathan moaned as he tilted his head back, a shiver of delight running down his spine at the feel of that mouth kissing and nipping lightly down his neck, Duke's beard tickling the sensitive skin.
"I will never understand your obsession with it..." Nathan managed to moan out as he ran a hand up through the long unruly hair of his lover. Firmly yet gently, his fingers curled through the tangled locks as he clung to the man who was sending every nerve in his body into overdrive.
"It is a part of you, Nathan..." Duke whispered into his ear. "Why would I not be obsessed with everything about it?"
"Because there is nothing attractive about this scar," Nathan said bluntly, causing Duke to pull back and look down at his lover, a flicker of sadness shining in his eyes.
"Scars are sexy as hell. I don't know how many times I have to tell you that," Duke said softly as he shifted so he was laying on his side next to Nathan, looking up at him as he reached out and brushed the hair back from his face, admiring how handsome his lover looked with his hair longer and a bit unkempt.
"You're weird," Nathan said as he closed his eyes, biting his lip against the moan that threatened to spill from his lips as Duke ran his fingers lightly over the large scar on his stomach. Duke lightly traced the large arch, smiling slightly at the way his lover trembled under his touch.
"If you have such a dislike for your scar, do you feel the same about mine?" Duke asked softly as he leaned back and watched the look on Nathan's face change.
"Course not. It's different with yours Duke..."
"How is it any different Nathan?" Duke said with a soft chuckle, still amazed at how weird Nathan was about this subject. " We literally have matching scars. You do remember that, right?" Duke asked as he took Nathan's hand and laid it over the same curved scar that ran along his stomach, just above the waistband of the pants he wore.
"Do you really think I would be able to forget, Duke?"
"No… though it seems you have forgotten that yours is no bigger or uglier than mine. So why this aversion to me even looking at yours? It's been what, three years? Why does it bother you so much still?"
"Because," Nathan said his voice soft and strained as he turned his head away. "You are Duke, sexiest man in Haven. Scars are sexy on sexy people. I… I am anything but sexy and…."
Nathan was silenced as Duke firmly yet lovingly grabbed hold of his chin and turned his face so he was looking into those deep blue eyes.
"Not another word," he said as he held Nathan's face gently and leaned forward so his forehead was pressed against his lover's. "You know how I feel about you, Nathan. You know what you mean to me. I may have had more exploits and I may have wilder stories to tell but you…" he said as he pulled away and looked at the man he loved more than anything in the world. "You Nathan Wuornos, are the one I love, the one I chose, the one I have dedicated my life to. It is you I want to spend my life with. It is you who saved me and it is you who are the only reason I am here right now. Do not ever doubt how much I love you and how much I need you, every single moment, with every breath that I take. I love every part of you… including your scar."
Nathan felt his face flush slightly as he lost himself in those deep dark eyes that always seemed to be able to read him like a fucking book. No matter what he was feeling or how well he thought he was hiding his emotions, Duke always seemed to know what his partner was feeling at any given moment. It both made him love the man all the more while also making him curse his name on more than one occasion. He moaned softly as Duke leaned over and lightly brushed his lips over the ragged scar, kissing along it with feather-light brushes that made Nathan's skin tingle.
"I know you do," Nathan said softly. "Doesn't mean I do."
"You wish it had never happened, that you hadn't gone through with it?" Duke asked as he glanced up at his partner, trying to read the emotions that rose and fell over his face.
"No! Not at all! Stop putting words into my mouth Duke!" Nathan said, his voice a little harsher than he had meant. He knew he was being unreasonable and that it didn't make sense why he felt that way. He wasn't at all ashamed of the scar or how he got it. He was embarrassed by how people treated him and how in the months that followed and even now nearly three years later, people still seemed to act differently around him than they did before... like they pitied him... Or thought he had done something he regretted. That was what he didn't like...
"Nathan... whatever your hang-up is... you have to know that I of all people understand and appreciate what you did. It took a lot of guts. Most people in this town wouldn't have had the balls to even entertain the idea of what you actually did. If the way they react is what bothers you, I say tell them to fuck off."
"Duke..."
"No, I am being fucking serious, Natahn. Your scar is a badge of honor and bravery. You should be proud of it and show it off as a testament to what a fucking decent human being you are."
Nathan watched his lover quietly. Duke didn't get this worked up about much these days but this was clearly something he cared deeply about...and Nathan knew better than to try and distract him or sideline the conversation at this point.
"You have reason to be proud of your scar. Mine...mine is a reminder of just how badly I have fucked up my life and of all the bad choices and terrible mistakes I have made. It is a reminder of the time I almost did the one thing I promised I would never intentionally do- hurt you."
"Duke... I did what anyone would do when their lover, their partner, their soulmate, their everything needed them- do whatever I could to make things right."
"And that is exactly what I am talking about Nathan! You did something good to get your scar. I got mine by being a complete asshole and idiot who nearly threw his life away!"
"Ok, so it was kind of a big deal..."
"No...No. Standing in the middle of the Grey Gull, surrounded by all our friends, and announcing our engagement... That was kind of a big deal Nathan. This... this was a huge deal. This right here" he said running his fingers along the scar on Nathan's stomach once again. "This right here is the reason I have mine... and it is the reason I am still alive right now."
Nathan fell quiet as he stared at Duke, watching as tears began to spill out from those dark eyes.
"I never had anyone so much as give me a second thought for most of my life. My own parents couldn't care less if I lived or died. Yet you... you somehow manage to love this worthless soul enough that you were willing to make the ultimate sacrifice if needed... And now. I get to keep living. Forever carrying a piece of you, literally, with me for the rest of my life. That is not something I will ever forget and it is not something I will ever take for granted, Nathan. I owe you my life...in more ways than one."
Nathan reached a hand out and gently held Duke's face his hands as he ran his thumb across his cheek gently, wiping away some of the tears. Without a word, he pulled Duke to him tightly, wrapping his arms around him and holding him close, quietly listening to that familiar thunder of his lover's heartbeat. Closing his eyes, his mind drifted back to those horrible months that in some ways seemed so long ago and in others felt like only yesterday.
He remembered sitting by Duke's hospital bed as they ran test after test to find out what was wrong with him. It hadn't taken the doctors long to confirm that their suspicions were accurate- Duke was well into advanced liver failure, brought on by years of a less than a healthy lifestyle of booze, drugs, and questionable business dealings. Nathan still remembered that terrifying moment when the doctor broke the news that the only chance Duke had of surviving was to get clean and stay clean for at least a year and then cling to the hope they could find a suitable donor before Duke's liver gave out on him completely.
Nathan blinked back the tears that were threatening to form in his eyes and listened to the heartbeat of his best friend, his lover, his partner and he pulled Duke into an even tighter embrace.
"I couldn't stand the thought of losing you, Duke. I knew I wouldn't survive without you. I knew I had to do whatever was in my power to make sure you were going to be ok. I would do anything in my power to make sure you were still here beside me."
Duke ran fingers through the brown hair and kissed the top of Nathan's head as he held him close.
"Not many people would even consider doing something fairly common like donate a kidney to someone... even fewer would go through with something as risky as donating part of their liver. I will never forget what you did for me Nathan...never. Every breath I have taken since that day... is because of you. And I will spend the rest of my life making sure you know how much that meant to me and how much it means to me still. It will take the rest of my life, but I will make sure you know how much you mean to me."
Nathan smiled sadly, his mind falling back to the terrible time that followed that shocking diagnosis from the doctors. They hadn't held much hope that Duke would make it, saying that he would likely not even survive the one year he would have to be clean before he'd even be considered for a transplant. In typical Duke fashion, he ended up proving them all wrong, though it was far from easy. They had been right that the odds were stacked against him- he barely survived those agonizing and painful 15 months but that was largely due to the strain that the struggle to get clean put his body through. Those first few months were the hardest as the doctors had ordered Duke into a rehab center to help with the detox and inevitable withdrawals that would come. Nathan would never let Duke know it, but deep down, he had been terrified at that time that Duke would not be able to get clean, let alone stay that way. He was scared to death to lose the man that meant the world to him and he promised himself that day that he was not going to let Duke fight this alone. He was there for him every step of the way, doing everything he could to help his lover get his life back on track.
"Now you're the one doing it again," Duke said with a soft smile as he ran a hand down the side of Nathan's face gently, drawing his lover out of his daze of memories.
"Sorry..." Nathan muttered as he blinked and slowly pulled back, looked once more at the man that meant absolutely everything to him. "Just... remembering those first few months..."
Duke nodded as he smiled sadly, his own mind drifting back as well for a moment.
"I know that no one believed I would be able to do it. Hell... I wasn't even sure that I could do it. What I was sure of was I was not going to go down without a fight and I was going to do everything in my power to make sure I was there to take your name, as I promised you I would."
"And I am so glad you did," Nathan whispered softly as he shifted his position on the bed and gently pushed Duke down into the mattress and leaned over him. "You are my reason for living…" Nathan whispered softly as he leaned over and lightly kissed along the scar that ran across his lover's stomach and side. "Without you, I would be completely lost..." He whispered as he trailed soft kisses along Duke's skin. "Without you, I have nothing left to fight for."
Looking up for a moment Nathan locked eyes with Duke, neither one able or willing to break the gaze at first. Nathan smiled sadly as he shifted so he was supporting himself with one arm and ran fingers down the side of Duke's face again.
"You are my everything," Nathan said, his voice heavy with emotion as he fought back the lump that he felt forming in his throat. "I love you... Duke Wuornos."
It had only been a few months, and though he had dreamt for years of hearing that name spoken out loud Duke still could not believe that it had actually happened. Duke threw his arms around Nathan and pulled him close into a deep and passionate kiss. He clung to his lover as the tears began to slip down his cheeks- tears of joy, tears of gratitude, tears of undying love, and tears of desire. Together they lay in their bed, held each other closely, protectively, lovingly as everything else around them faded and all they knew was the warmth of each other's embrace. Nathan held his husband close, reminding him in that one perfect moment that, no matter what lay ahead for them, they were going to face it the way they were meant to- together- always- forever.