Chapter 11

Several months have passed as Leonard's relationship with Alex has become steady and stable. He was alone in the cafeteria having lunch when Howard and Raj joined him carrying their food trays.

"Where's Alex?" Howard asked.

"She's at her apartment. She's feeling a little under the weather today so she decided to get some rest and come back to work when she's feeling better. What's up?" Leonard said.

"Well I may have some good news for you." Howard said.

"What is it Howard?" he asked.

"Well….Stephen Hawking's team is looking to investigate his theory regarding Unruh Radiation and planning to go on an expedition in the North Sea. Their experimental physicist backed out and I recommended you in his place." Howard said as he ate his food.

"Wow! Really?….do you think I have a shot at this?" Leonard asked.

"Of course. I worked with Hawking and it looks like it's a done deal." Howard smiled.

"Congratulations dude. This is a fantastic opportunity and with Stephen Hawking no less." Raj said.

"Yeah. I think they already emailed President Siebert and Dr. Gablehauser regarding this." Howard said.

"I don't know what to say Howard…..thank you!" Leonard laughed at the good news.

"You're welcome Leonard…you deserve this." Howard added. "By the way….have you heard from the casting director of the movie?" he asked.

"Yeah…..Penny didn't get in." Leonard continued. "I did what I could." he said.

"I feel bad for Penny….I wonder how she took the bad news?" Raj said.

"We all feel bad for her but what can we do? It's not like we can dictate who they cast for the movie." Leonard said.

They continued having lunch while talking about the movie and other stuff with work.

Meanwhile, Amy was about to go out to lunch when her IPad rang. It was Bernadette calling her through Skype. Amy pressed the green icon on the tablet.

A: "Hi Bernadette! I was about to get lunch. What's up?"

B: "Did you hear about Penny's audition?"

A: "Yeah. Sheldon told me."

B: "I feel really bad for Penny."

A: "We all feel bad for her but it's not like we can do anything about it."

B: "Have you heard from her lately?"

A: "No. I haven't heard from her for a couple of weeks now. Why?"

B: "Me too. I've been texting her but she doesn't respond. She doesn't even answer my calls anymore."

A: "Me too. Maybe she's just busy with work."

B: "I don't know Amy….I mean….I'm beginning to think you're right about Penny going through that depression thing."

A: "What!?"

B: "Yeah. I mean she already missed her chance with Leonard again and then Leonard got her the audition but she never got the part….it's just one blow after another."

A: "Why don't we go to her place later and see how she is doing?"

B: "Okay...let's say seven?"

A: "Great….I'll bring the food and you bring the wine."

B: "Okay see you later."

Later that night, Amy and Bernadette knocked on Penny's door. Penny opened it and let them inside.

"Hi guys! What's up?" Penny said as the two made their way inside and sat on the couch.

"Well, we haven't heard from you for two weeks now and we're beginning to worry." Amy said.

"Yeah. We heard about the audition Penny. I wish we could do something about it." Bernadette said as Amy began to unpack the food she brought.

"Well it is what it is…." Penny said sitting on the chair.

Bernadette then noticed a stack of folded boxes in the corner. "What's with all the boxes?" she asked.

"Oh, I'm moving back to Nebraska." Penny said casually.

Both girls yelled. "What!?…. Why!?" they exclaimed.

Penny sighed. "Come on guys….it's not like I'm successful here in California….my finances are a wreck, my personal life is a mess, my career is going nowhere….I failed." she said as she started crying.

Amy and Bernadette stood up and hugged their friend. It was too much for them to process the notion of Penny deciding to leave everything behind and move back to her home in Nebraska. They felt really sad for Penny considering herself a failure.

"But bestie you can't leave…you're the best friend that I never had in high school!" Amy said.

"She's right Penny…...you can't leave me and Amy behind!" Bernadette said.

"I'm sorry but I already decided…..my dad's coming here in a few weeks to help me move. Please don't tell the guys I'm leaving….I'm already embarrassed as it is." Penny said as she wiped her tears.

"Penny please don't go….if you want you can stay with me in my apartment." Amy said.

"I'm sorry Amy but I don't want to be a burden. I've already taken too much favors from you guys." Penny said. The girls were silent for some time until Bernadette turned to Amy.

"Should we tell her?" she asked Amy.

"Tell me what?" Penny asked.

Bernadette hesitated then decided to speak. "Well, Leonard is sort of leaving too." she said.

"What? Where is he going?" Penny asked.

"Well he's been asked to join an expedition to the North Sea to join Stephen Hawking's team." Bernadette said.

"Stephen Hawking….that's the wheelchair guy right?" Penny asked.

"Yes. He's gonna be there for four months." Amy said.

"What do you want me to do? I mean Leonard is with Alex now and he certainly has no business being involved with a loser like me." Penny said.

"Come on Penny….you're being too hard on yourself." Amy said.

"It's true. Leonard's the only good thing that happened to me here in California and I threw it away…..I guess both of us leaving is a sign that we're not meant to be together." Penny started crying again. Amy hugged her best friend. "Please don't tell Leonard I'm leaving." Penny added.

"Come on Penny. He deserves to know." Bernadette said.

"No Bernie. I don't think I can face him like this." Penny said. The two girls stayed with Penny until midnight and promised to help her out for the remainder of her stay.

A couple of days later, Leonard was in his lab finalizing the details of his upcoming trip when Amy and Bernadette showed up in his lab.

"Hey guys! What are you doing here?" Leonard said.

"Nothing. Just visiting…making sure you're ready for your trip." Amy said.

"Well, I'm almost done with the preparations." he said.

"Have you heard from Penny?" Bernadette asked.

"No. Last I heard was she didn't get the part in the movie. Did anything happen to her?" Leonard asked.

"She's leaving Leonard." Amy said.

"Where is she going?" Leonard saw the seriousness in Amy's face.

"She's moving back to Nebraska." Bernadette said.

"What!? Why!?" Leonard was surprised.

"Well, she said she failed here in California and that her life was going nowhere." Amy added. "We tried to convince her to stay but her mind's already made up." she said.

Leonard couldn't it. He felt a knot in his stomach thinking that he wouldn't see Penny anymore. "I don't know what to say. Why are telling me this?" he asked.

"Maybe you can convince her to stay." Bernadette said.

"What am I gonna tell her? It's not like she's my girlfriend or anything." Leonard said.

"We don't know Leonard. She knows how hurt you were when you guys broke up and she's really sorry for what happened." Amy said.

"What? Then why didn't she say that to me face to face? You guys know I'm with Alex right?" Leonard said.

"We know." Bernadette said.

"I was pretty devastated when she dumped me. I thought I wouldn't be happy again and then she went with Zack, dumped him and slept with me. I thought we would get back together but she said she made a mistake…she called me a mistake...do you know how hurtful being used like that was?" Leonard said trying hard to prevent his hands from shaking.

"We know Leonard." Amy said.

"It took every ounce of strength I had to move on and tell myself that maybe we're not really meant to be together." Leonard said trying to calm himself down. "When will she be leaving?" he asked.

"I think she will leave the same time as you." Bernadette said.

Leonard sighed. "What do you want me to do?" he asked.

"Can you at least talk to her? Just so the two of you will have some form of closure." Amy said.

Leonard put his face on his hands. "Fine. I'll talk to her tonight." he said.

"Thank you Leonard." Bernadette said. The two of them decided to leave Leonard in his lab.

Leonard sat in his lab, deep in thought.

Later that night, Leonard knocked on Penny's door. Penny opened it after a few minutes and was surprised to see Leonard on her door.

"Leonard! Hi! What's up?" she said.

"Hi Penny. Are you busy? Can we talk?" Leonard asked.

"Sure. Come in." Penny let him in. Leonard walked in and sat on the couch.

"Penny I heard you were moving back to Nebraska." he said. Penny sat down on the chair.

"Amy told you?" she asked.

"Yeah. Why are you moving back?" Leonard said.

Penny sighed. "My debt is piling up Leonard...my career is going nowhere...my life is a mess…." she said.

"Why didn't you tell me?" he asked.

"Leonard…you've already done so much for me. After what I did to you, I don't think I deserve any more of your kindness." she said trying hard not to break down.

"Penny." he said.

Penny sat beside him and held his hands. "I'm really sorry for what happened Leonard. You're the greatest guy I know and I took you for granted. I broke your heart and I wish I could take it back." Penny said as tears form in her eyes.

Leonard squeezed her hand. "Penny, I already forgave you. I was angry at you for like two days but after that I realized my mistake. I shouldn't have pushed you into saying that you love me." he said.

"No Leonard. It was me who made a mistake. I never should have broken up with you." Penny started crying.

Leonard pulled her close to hug her. Penny hugged him back and cried on his shoulder.

"When you asked me to watch a movie with you, I got scared of getting hurt again." he said trying to console her.

Penny looked at him. "I'm so sorry Leonard. I know it's too late for me to get you back since you're with Alex now. You're so successful and has no business being with a loser like me." Penny said.

"Penny you're not a loser. I don't want to hear that from you. Promise me you'll never say that about yourself again." he said holding her.

Penny looked at him. "Why are you so kind to me?" she asked.

Leonard looked straight into her eyes. "You know why." he said.

"I love you Leonard." she said and without warning, wrapped her arms around his neck and kissed him passionately. Leonard was surprised but found himself returning her affections. They were kissing for several minutes when Leonard slowly broke off.

"Penny…..what are we doing?" he asked.

"I don't know Leonard." she said as she stood up and pulled him into the bedroom.

"Penny?…..No….." Leonard protested.

"Leonard please…..I need to feel it again…." Penny said as she closed her bedroom door and began kissing him. Leonard tried to break free but Penny locked her arms around him.

"Penny please….this is wrong…." he said as Penny started to take her clothes off.

"Please Leonard…..no one has to know…." she said as she started to unbutton his shirt and pants. Penny was possessed with desire as she shed the last of her clothing. She then pushed Leonard on her bed and put her whole body on top of him while burying herself into his arms, taking off his clothes. Leonard surrendered to Penny's advances and started kissing her passionately while moving his hands to explore the rest of her body. They made love without saying a single word.

They laid on the bed, breathing heavily and looking blankly at the ceiling. Leonard couldn't believe that he just cheated on Alex. His head was now a pool of emotions - guilt, sadness, confusion, regret and anger for what he just did. Penny turned and rested her head on his chest, facing him.

"Are you angry with me?" she asked.

Leonard looked at her. "No…..I'm angry at myself….This is wrong….We never should have done this." he said.

"No one has to know." she said and continued. "I love you Leonard." she whispered.

Leonard sighed. "I love you too Penny." he said. Penny put her arm around his body and hugged him tight.

"Bernadette told me you were going to the North Sea?" she asked.

"Yeah. It's kind of a big deal actually." he said.

"I know….with that wheelchair guy?" she said.

"Well, he's not actually going with us. He's just sending his team." he said. They stayed silent for a while. "What are we gonna do now?" he asked.

"I don't know…..my dad's gonna come in a couple of weeks to help me with the move." she said.

"I know….and it's kinda late for me to back out on this trip." he said.

"So I guess this will be our last time together huh?" she asked.

"I guess." he added. "I have to go back before Sheldon gets suspicious." he said.

"No….don't go….just give me tonight….please." she looked at him.

"Penny." he said.

"Please don't go." Penny pleaded hugging him tighter.

Leonard sighed. "Why is it so hard to say no to you?" he said.

Penny smiled and kissed him passionately. It took no time and they found themselves making love again, saying sweet nothings to each other and savoring their stolen moment together. They made love until the early hours of the morning.

It was already four in the morning when Leonard decided to get dressed and go back to his apartment while Sheldon's still asleep. Penny sat on the edge of her bed looking at Leonard while he puts on his clothes. She grabbed her robe and put it on as Leonard finished getting dressed. She went to him and put her hands around his neck to kiss him. Leonard returned her kisses and hugged her tight.

"I guess this is goodbye huh?" Penny asked. Leonard nodded. "Leonard….I'll wait for you." she said.

"What?….Penny no!" he said.

"No Leonard….I already made my decision….I know this is not the end for us….I can feel it!" Penny said.

Leonard sighed. "Penny." he said.

"I'm not gonna stand between you and Alex….but if for some reason….you know how to reach me and I'll be there." she said.

"You really love me huh?" he asked.

"Leonard, with all my heart….I got scared before but I'm not scared now….I'll let you go because I love you." she said as she kissed him again. Leonard left her apartment and quietly made his way into his bedroom. He slumped face down on his bed knowing that sleep would not come to him.

Leonard never saw Penny again after that. Alex dropped him off at the airport on the day of his trip. He grabbed a baggage cart and put his luggage on it while Alex looks onto him.

"So this is it?" Leonard said as Alex hugged and kissed him.

"Take care of yourself alright?" Alex said trying hard not to cry. "Ugh...I miss you already." she said hugging him again.

"Me too." he whispered to her. "As soon as we're done, I'm gonna take the first flight back. I promise." he said kissing her one last time. They waved goodbye to each other as Leonard pushed his baggage cart into the airport entrance. He was done checking-in his luggage and going thru immigration and security in under an hour and went straight to the boarding gate of his flight. He sat on a vacant seat as he looked out onto the horizon. He felt like being torn in half, he was thinking of Alex but he loved Penny. He tried to shake the image of both women from his mind as he heard the boarding call for his flight joining the other passengers making a beeline in boarding the aircraft.