Disclaimers: All right reserved of the originals "Star Wars" Characters, Names, Places, etc., to George Lucas / Disney. I pledge to return all characters after the story is complete.
Warning: Major Spoilers of TRoS.
Note: This is a Reylo FanFiction (slow-burn)
「Act 29: That damn Broom」
Ajan Kloss, 36 ABY
At the start of the nightmare, Ben was invited into a dark castle. Beyond walls that folks would normally assume were the dwelling's boundaries was a chamber of horrors, where people trapped below floorboards could be seen through areas with missing planks.
He ran. He ran towards them, the souls of those he had hurt. Upon entering through, shots fired, and he saw an old friend, whom he had not seen in years, in the path of one of the plasma bolts. He dove in front of him and shielded him.
The nightmare was more of a morning terror because he felt as if he might die from the pain in his brain; he was so desperate to wake up. He screamed for help, but nobody came.
Then in the dream, his skin became like the surface of a boiling stew. Beneath his thin skin bubbled toxins, which symbolized his past pains in his blood, seeking release. And released they were. One by one, the bubbles burst easily like pimples.
Then a mirror appeared before him, and he studied his reflection; perhaps these new injuries would take a little while to heal... but after that, the pain would be gone, and he would be ready to live anew, to feel strong, confident, once again.
Then, there was silence. He was paralyzed, naked, and cold. He tried to move, but it didn't matter which way Ben chose; each path always led back to the same spot, the entrance of the chamber of horrors.
There was only one way out. The ghosts beneath the floor were more silent than the graves they arose from, staring with heavy-lidded eyes and slack mouths. Instead of running or screaming, Ben stood stiller than the mossy statue of a young man with curling hair and a woman at his side that stood in the heart of the graveyard. Both wore chains around their wrists, but they wielded them like weapons. The woman was injured across her back, but she smiled in the face of danger. Somehow, Ben knew that that woman with her fighting smile and brave battle stance, she was not cowering behind the Jedi at her side, was his grandmother, Padmé Amidila. He glanced at her face once more; her smile seemed to say, "This is your destiny, Ben. This is the destiny of all Jedi. Face the past and conquer it." He turned back to the chamber; she was wrong; he would remain with them forever. That was the only way to atone.
The thought became a desire, and his insides lit with an intense urgency to make it possible. He took a step forward. Then his body crumpled to the ground, and his knees curled up to his face like an unborn baby in its mother's womb. It was then that he heard someone shouting his name over and over. Ben opened his mouth to speak, but no sound came out of it. He was drawn strongly towards the chamber of horrors; the souls there wanted him with them. Though the voice came louder, infused with power, "Ben, no!"
He shivered, and he turned away from the chamber of horror and gazed at the man. He noted, 'the young man with the chains calling him back. The voice was that of his grandfather, and if he listened intently, he could hear Padmé as well.
Ben startled awake, his heavy breathing echoed loudly in his ears, and his clothes were drenched with sweat. It was only a nightmare. Ben thought as he looked around the room. He sat up slowly, noting that it was morning, and Rey had already gone.
"Riddle me this. How can I call it a nightmare if it doesn't leave my presence when I awake?" Ben mumbled to himself as he dropped his head into his hands. He was his own worst nightmare because he knew it wasn't his own pain he feared; he feared the pain of those he had wronged, those he had killed, and those he loved.
"But there is a price, Ben; there is still a price to pay! But there is a price, Ben, there..." A voice whispered inside his mind. The chant only stopped when he was fully awake.
He lifted his head, and then, with a steady gaze, he picked a spot on the wall in front of him and stared at it until he had cleared his mind and clearly saw the room. His nightmare had ended, though the burden of it still burned his insides and the weight of his misdeeds still rested heavily on his shoulders.
Ben stood up without complaint; he would never grumble about the past he had created. He would stand his ground and take it all. He was lucky that he was treated like a human being; he wasn't worthy of that consideration.
He walked over to the table to where someone had left breakfast out for him. He laughed at the irony of it but wolfed it down. He would make sure he took care of himself and remained alive and well. Remained alive to pay the price, every day and every night. He would not run away from the past. He would not.
It was already past ten when Ben walked out of the small living unit and towards its main area. It was a busy day, like every day, people were running around finishing their jobs. Ben paused and gazed at everyone with confusion. Each knew what they were supposed to do, but unlike them, Ben didn't know what he was allowed to do, what he should do.
Kylo Ren had always been able to read between the lines, and he had known what his next move would be. Even when Luke was training him as a Jedi, Ben hadn't had to ask what came next. But today, as he was standing in front of the Resistance base, Ben Solo was lost. He stood silently like a child and waited to be told what he should do.
Rey was long gone into one of Ajan Kloss's deep jungles for her training, and Ben sensed her through the Force. Poe and Finn were behind the command desk, analyzing the data from the Analyzer one more time. The droids C-3PO and R2-D2 were arguing about a few assignments they had to run and were too engrossed in it to notice him. Honestly, Ben didn't understand the point in their fight, so he ignored them.
Rose was repairing the sub-alternators in an X-wing, the Chewbacca was disconnecting a fuel hose from the Millennium Falcon. Most of the ships were nearly prepped and ready, though it had only been 18 hours since the last attack.
Ben took a deep breath and searched around for a familiar face, someone to guide him through.
He turned his head, and suddenly, Maz was beside him, studying him intently. "Fighting and facing the darkest parts of the Galaxy and of yourself sometimes seem easier than knowing what to do?" she chaffed, somehow knowing what Ben was up against. Somehow, Maz always knew.
Ben turned his head and faced her, his curly hair covering most of his face. He hadn't had a haircut for a year now, and his damn hair had grown too long. "First time in my life, I don't know what I am supposed to do!" He mumbled, a bit ashamed.
"Give it time," Maz advised, "You found your way here. Now finding your way around will come in time."
Ben nodded, but he was still baffled. He couldn't just stand around without doing anything. It sounded silly, but if Poe had kept him as a prisoner, it would be easier. He was free to roam around, but freedom was nothing if he had nothing to do.
Maz pointed at the broom next to him. "You could start by sweeping the floors," she suggested. "It creates calmness when you clean, and you may find your way."
Ben's tilted his head like a confused child; broom, he thought. It took him a few long seconds to remember what a broom was. Was he supposed to clean? That sounded ridiculous. He had never in his life held a broom, not as Ben Solo, and never as Kylo Ren. Ben Solo was raised in luxury; whatever the problems he had faced, cleaning was not one.
As Kylo Ren, there had been others who kept his chambers clean and neat. Even during the last year, when he had lived alone on Jakku, he had never cleaned.
Ben looked at Maz like she had asked him to do the most bizarre thing in the Galaxy. It took a few seconds for the idea to sink into his mind.
Then Ben summoned the broom to his hand. "A broom...that's a cleaning tool," he mumbled, and Maz nodded, walking away, hiding a laugh.
Ben observed the broom, which consisted of stiff fibers made of corn husks attached to a roughly parallel and cylindrical handle called the broomstick. "This stick is quite short..." He complained, only to realize that Maz was gone.
Ben took a deep breath and let the broom face the ground. "Ben, we can do this!" He assured himself.
This was silly; of course, he could figure out how to sweep the floors. He was the man responsible for bringing down the whole galaxy; he would figure out how to sweep. "Right!?" He asked aloud.
Finn had stopped paying attention to Poe as he gazed at Ben in confusion. He was not sure if he should laugh or cry. Poe stopped talking and looked at him. "Finn!" he called, "What's wrong? We have to figure this out."
Finn lifted his arm and pointed at Ben, who was struggling to hold the broom. "What is he doing?" He chuckled, "Is the broom attacking him, or is he attacking the broom? Your new friend is odd!"
Poe sat up straight and glanced at Ben, who had started a fight with the broom, before turning back to his work. Finn almost facepalmed himself. Really, the Supreme Leader of the First Order had no idea how to wield a broom. "Finn!" Poe cried in frustration, "You can go and teach him or help me out here!"
Finn looked away from Ben and shook his head, "No, thank you!" He exclaimed and went back at helping Poe with the decryption.
Ben set seriously to work on cracking the broom's 'code.' He was trying to sweep the ground with forwarding stokes, but he only managed to almost fall against the broom. It seemed that a fight had started when Ben tried to order the broom to sweep, and the broom didn't obey. Ben slowly became angry; never in his life had he been so clueless.
Rose wiped her hands and watched as Ben tried to use the broom. As she watched, Rose tried to figure out what he was using it for. "You know it'd stop attacking you if you stopped using it so aggressively," Rose informed him as he turned around the corner.
Ben kept struggling with the broom, almost ignoring her, "It's just not obeying." he muttered angrily and threw away the broom, "I can't figure it out!"
Rose admitted to herself at that moment that Ben Solo looked nothing like the Kylo Ren she had heard about. He even looked different from yesterday. His natural color was back; he seemed rested and well. Rose caught the flying broom and tapped her boot on the ground to get Ben's attention.
"Look!" she said and started slowly and softly sweeping the floors. "See, you work the broom this way, slowly..." Rose showed him, "... don't attack the broom... use it to sweep, like this,"
Ben sighed and watched her as Rose did it; it seemed really easy. He accepted the broom back from Rose and tried again. This time at least, he was not struggling with the broom, but he was not exactly sweeping the floors either.
Rose nodded and stepped away and back to working on fine-tuning the rear shields of a faded green X-wing. She sighed; she had yet to figure how to bring the shield's sensors back on. She had tried everything, but nothing had worked.
Ben went on with his sweeping; if sweeping, it could be called for he had yet to master now how not to create dust all around. He paused as a coughing fit, overcame him, and watched Rose. For a little, he stared blankly at her before he noticed her trying to repair the shields.
"You have to reconnect the sensors and restart the system." Ben recited as he walked a bit closer to the X-wing, "The system controls the whole craft. You need to restart it, and it will update the sensors automatically."
Rose jerked her head around in surprise, but she tried what Ben had suggested. It took her only a few minutes to reconnect the sensors and restart the system, and just as he said, it worked at once. "Maybe you should help me and give the poor broom a break." Rose offered hesitatingly.
Ben didn't complain after that. He worked with Rose, and she realized that Ben Solo was skilled in fixing or repairing spacecraft. He had Han Solo to thank for that. Ben had spent his early years flying around with his father and Chewie in the Millennium Falcon. It had been him who had most often ended up fixing the Falcon. After that, it didn't take Ben long to connect with others; he helped them.
When he was done helping Rose, Chewbacca dragged him along to fix the Falcon's compressor line. The Wookie had fixed the compressor many times, but it persisted in breaking down every few weeks.
It only took a few moments for Solo to fix the problem; after all, he knew the Falcon better than anyone. It had been his father's, and Han had taught him well. In another life, where he wouldn't have become Kylo Ren, the Falcon would have been his, and he would have roamed the Galaxy with it. He probably would have been a smuggler like his father had been; it was a decent job, better than being Kylo Ren.
It was only noon, but inexplicably, the repairs came to an end, and Ben found himself sitting surrounded by people eating lunch. Even Rey was back with BB-8, and she joined them. Ben was out of his comfort zone, he was now sitting with the same people he had wronged, and he was sharing a meal with them. He took a bite of his food and tried to hide his tears. Since yesterday, the Resistance had taught him how human beings should live and react. He was surprised by how the people here worked and helped each other in their daily routine when they weren't fighting for freedom, that was. This type of life was alien to Ben Solo.
"Your hair has grown too long!" Rey's voice came suddenly at his side as she tried to pull him out of the bitter thoughts she could sense through their connection. "Let me trim it for you!"
Ben looked at her, tilting his head apprehensive, "Is it safe?" he asked.
"I always cut my own hair, you'll see, I know what I am doing!" Rey assured him.
Poe almost gagged, and he spat some of the food from his mouth, "Never trust your hair in her hands, Ben!" Poe said, and Finn and Rose agreed unanimously.
Rey frowned and looked at him, "Ben! You'll trust me, right?"
For a moment, Ben wished he could be back in his old life and have a professional deal with his hair. He knew he shouldn't be picky; he was not allowed to be...but his hair was his breaking point.
"Should I?" Ben asked her, still not certain if he should let Rey mess with his hair.
"You can eventually get a haircut tomorrow; we will go to buy some refills," Poe suggested, and he felt Rey's eyes glaring at him.
"He wouldn't have the credits for that. Rey sounds like a good option." Someone else said.
Maz and Ben turned and looked at him confusedly. Then Maz spoke: "I'm sure Ben Solo retains enough credits to give us all a haircut, and maybe more."
Maz's words won everyone's attention. "Wait, you are rich?" Finn asked him, "How?"
"Well, I guess from Princess Leia's inheritance..." Someone muttered and then trailed off uncertainty.
Ben gazed at him, and he couldn't deny it. His parents had left him an enormous quantity of credits. Money had never been an issue. But as Kylo Ren, he had made his own fortune. Of course, he had never needed to check his balance, but he was sure his credits were still valid to use. "I don't need to use my mother's credits..." he wanted to say that he had made his own, but that was money he earned with innocent blood.
Rey stood up suddenly and grabbed his hand, pulling him from his seat and towards an opening. Ben followed her confusedly, and he ended up sitting down on a stool and waiting for Rey to return. When she did, she wrapped a towel around his neck and then began brushing his hair slowly. Ben stared at her in utter confusion.
"Don't!" Rey exclaimed loudly when he tried to move, "Let me fix your hair!"
Ben wanted to fight her away, but he didn't. He never let anyone mess with his hair, but if Rey wanted to... he would not deny her. He closed his eyes and let her cut and trim his hair. His heart beat faster, frightened of the outcome, but Rey was careful and made sure to cut his hair the way he liked. She snipped until it was the same length as he had used to have it. Of course, the trim wasn't a straight cut, but it wasn't jagged either. His curly hair hid the irregularities well.
A man's haircut is a statement of sorts, but the messages this particular cut delivered was entirely different from what Ben had intended. Even so, Rey somehow pulled it off, and the haircut was a success. She cleaned off his neck and pulled the towel away. Then she stepped in front of him, letting her fingers tangle in his curls as she checked to see if they were cut the same length. Rey smiled warmly at the feeling of his silky hair between her fingers, and she took her time checking his hair.
On his side, Ben felt his heart skipping a beat or two. The feeling of having Rey so close to him and her fingers tangled all through his hair made the poor boy blush. He was not used to being touched in such a gentle way. His cheeks slowly reddened, and he felt awkward, not knowing how to cope with the situation. But, the moment was soon lost, and Rey pulled back.
"You look much better now!" she decided and tapped his shoulder.
「 Upcoming Chapter: Act Thirty」
More than anything, thank you for taking the time to read this!
Feel free to Review and Follow!
Adelgado28: Yup, it surely will. But that will happen later in the story. ^_^
Kynria: Thank you. Honestly, I am curious as well how this story will end up. I hope it will get even better. ^_^
thereisaredeemer: I just noticed your reviews. I will edit the previous chapters as you recommended a bit later today. Thank you! ^_^ Yup, it was supposed to be whip. I have to fix that as soon as possible. It's really not easy trying to write each character. But honestly, I want to be able to add more characters through the story. Now about the way you write your reviews, it's perfectly fine. I am really so thankful to you that you take all the time to correct my mistakes. I guess you will see this response too late, so I'll PM you a thank you. ^_^