Ami stood there, confusion etched across her face. As she watched Makoto gaze into the distance, she felt her chest tighten. What was going on? Why had Makoto suddenly turned away? She had to find out. She would not forsake another chance to tell Makoto how she felt. So Ami walked slowly towards her friend.
"Hey, what's wrong?" she said, laying a hand on Makoto's upper arm.
The tall girl flinched slightly at the touch but didn't answer or turn around. This surprised Ami. Why would Makoto flinch at her touch? And then a thought hit her.
"I'm sorry", she whispered, removing her hand and lowering her head.
The sudden absence of the warmth on her arm finally jerked Makoto out of her thoughts. She spun around just as Ami started to slouch away. Makoto reached out and grabbed her friend's wrist.
"Wait", she said, "Don't leave, please."
The vulnerability in her voice surprised Ami as much as it hurt her to think that her friend was suffering. Ami stopped, noticing that Makoto was still holding on to her arm and was silently asking her to turn around. And Ami complied. When she faced her friend she remained silent and waited for the tall girl to speak. Makoto was looking at her but her expression was uncertain – something Ami had never seen in her friend.
"I'm so sorry, Ami", Makoto said finally.
Ami tilted her head, "About what, Makoto?"
The tall girl hesitated for a moment but then spoke, "I'm sorry I couldn't protect you and that you ended up here too. You deserve better and a genius like you should be out there changing the world. And without you the others' chances of defeating Queen Beryl are small."
She hung her head and Ami understood better. Makoto always felt that she had the duty of protecting all of her friends because of her natural superior strength and fighting skills. This put a lot of pressure on Makoto and she was often very hard on herself.
"Makoto, stop!" Ami said firmly. "You were amazing and you took out two of those demons with your powers alone. And when we lost you…"
Her voice cracked and she swallowed.
"Ami"
Makoto reached out her hand but Ami took a step back. She could not be distracted now. She had to tell her friend how she felt. She had to overcome her fear and risk disappointment should Makoto not feel the same way.
"Makoto, I thought I'd never see you again, that I'd lost you forever", Ami blurted out and Makoto stared at her, surprised by her friend's uncharacteristically frantic voice. "I haven't been able to get the sound of your screams out of my head. Seeing you hanging there … I … I felt like I'd died with you. I was totally paralyzed and then I finally realized something."
She paused and Makoto was itching to prompt her but restrained herself, feeling Ami's distress.
"I realized that I had not only lost a fellow Senshi but I had lost the best friend I've ever had – actually, the only best friend I've ever known."
Makoto stared, surprised and moved by what Ami was telling her. But before she could formulate an answer, her friend continued as if to get all her thoughts out before her courage left her.
"From the second we met, Makoto, I've felt a special connection to you. I've tried to explain it but I can't. And I finally understand, I think, why I can't explain it. … Because, Makoto, I think you might be my soul mate."
The tall girl's incredulous look prompted Ami to continue. She could not stop now – she would not.
"I know it sounds crazy hearing me talk about soul mates – me who believes in logic and reason – but when you died, I felt empty … lost … like a part of my soul was missing. And, I know you probably don't feel the same way about me. That's totally ok. I just needed to tell you, Makoto – before I miss my chance again."
Makoto was still gazing nonplussed at Ami and the shorter girl felt her heart sink at the lack of reaction from her soul mate.
To be continued…