He was just simply tired of this, he... he felt too tired. Rain drops hit his body, but they simply didn't feel like rain drops. It felt as if they could crush him under their weight, he sloppily dragged himself towards the tavern, he creeped towards the entrance and slid into the building, water dripped off his silver hair, he was drenched in rain water. The tavern simply looked like what could be described as trash, if he had to say so.

The people...

The smell...

The building itself...

It was all a portrayal of what could be called trash, and he came here, because that is what he is. Trash, someone who couldn't even defend his comrades, not even his sensei.. Eh, what could he just do... missions couldn't keep his mind away for too long, could it? He groaned in annoyance and sat down on a bar stool.

He glanced to his side, a drunkard had faceplanted himself on the bar counter, the man had long brown hair and was wearing a dirtied up, badly worn dress shirt and black trousers. The drunkard raised his head, and their eyes met eachother. His black eyes against the drunkard's blue ones.

"Greetings, sir! I see that you are a ninja, eh~ Very respectable job indeed! Ah, one minute please~" the drunkard sweeped the bits of hay clinging to his clothing and his hair. "Honoured sir, poverty is no vice! I am sure that you know of that~ Being a drunkard is no virtue too! But.. sir, beggary! Beggary is a vice, my honoured sir. When one begs, he leaves no honour of his left in his body! It is sweeped off with a broom, in fact, so is he~ But sir, I wouldn't expect you to understand such things.. - No offense, of course~ - yet, I could see through your eyes as if they were a window to your soul, my sir, what is your problem?"

"I would rather not talk about it." Kakashi stated in a dull tone, yet he was interested by the tirade of the man.

"Ah~ Of course! I apologize for asking for such a thing in a blunt manner! But sir, me? I personally can tell you about my problems! I am a pig, honoured sir.. A pig! I am ready to accept that I am inferior, if someone was going to humiliate me, I would humiliate myself~ 'Why' you may ask! Why wouldn't I? I am a pig after all! My life is one devoid of meaning! Of course, life cannot have a prescribed meaning, and you must find it yourself, but me..?" the drunkard chuckled before continuing. "I have no reason to, honourable sir. Life.. life is nothing, who cares about friends, who cares about relatives?! Life is only important when you are there! Why would I care about others, heh~ But yet... I am a beggar, I am worse than trash! While others build their own walls to isolate theirselves from society, people build it for me~" he said with a wink and picked up where he left up. "Sir, come and insult me! I won't feel hurt by it!"

That was a lot to take in, that is for sure. Kakashi stared at the man blankly for a few seconds. "No, why would I insult you?"

The tirade had pulled the interest of many individuals to the bar counter, even the bartender was now listening to the 'funny fellow'.

"Hm.. I thought that I already had told you why, honourable sir. Because, I am a pig~ I deserve being humiliated! Whilst you are a man of great honour, you are a ninja after all.. look at me! I am just an useless man, from the capital of the Land of Fire, who am I to even talk with you? You.. you are something greater than I ever could be, tell me honoured sir, have you ever felt as if time and everything inbetween feels pointless? When time passes as if it was nothing, and you rot~"

This man.. he was simply disgusting. First, he tells him that he doesn't care about friends, he says that he cannot care about others.. This.. this is a monster. This is what he used to be, and what he currently he is, because he couldn't defend the ones he cared about. He seethed but kept it to himself. But, even if he felt angry at the man he could sympathize with him. He felt as if they were the same, yet they were direct opposites of eachother. "No, not at all." he said, responding to the question of the drunkard.

"Honoured sir, you are in luck then! You.. you wouldn't wanna know how it felt. Days pass by, yet.. it doesn't matter, it feels like a poison inside of your veins, slowly damaging not only your body, but the mind aswell~ My sir, the intense feeling of stagnation hurts, even if time passes as fast as it can, you become emotionlesss.. you become careless.. you turn into a bomb ready to explode, my sir~ It feels like you couldn't withstand any of it, good things? They turn into meaningless and basic pleasures that you get sick of~"

Kakashi paused, he said that he hadn't felt so, but yet.. It felt so similiar, since Obito died.. and he.. he.. killed Rin. He felt as if the drunkard was a window to his own emotions, yet it was different. This man was one isolated by society, but not that he isolated himself, he was isolated by them. That was perhaps one of the many differences between them, yet. He was a pig aswell, he was trash aswell. He couldn't afford losing another comrade, he couldn't afford losing another friend..

He..

just..

couldn't.

And since his sensei had died, there was nothing left for him. Absolutely nothing. His emotions had simplified, all of his friends, Gai and the others.. He couldn't afford to lose them, he feared even looking at their faces. That is why he had dedicated himself to Anbu in the first place, wasn't it? Because he was too afraid to see them, because of his own pathetic feelings, because of his trashiness.. He almost felt like he had to leave the tavern by now, but he didn't.

"I suppose that makes sense.. what was your name again?" he asked the drunkard, the drunkard simply got irked by the question before responding.

"Ah! You want to know my name? I am honoured~ My name is Toshiro." He cut himself short, as if his voice failed him. He hurriedly filled his glass, splashing a bit of the drink on the counter and on his dress shirt, drank and cleared his throat. "But, I would like to ask you sir! What makes you wanna learn the name of an animal such as myself? Heh, sir! I would like you to know that I am a beast by nature! No good thing could come out of me, it is not in my nature! Ah~ Let me tell you one thing sir, I lay drunk because I am too much of a coward to face my problems! Sir, I do not mean to offend you, but you are here aswell! You came here.. because you are too much of a coward, just like me~" his lips twisted into a small smile.

Kakashi could only find himself nodding, it felt like the most natural thing to do. He felt as if he was.. enlightened, if that was the correct word to choose. Who knew a drunkard could represent his emotions so well, yet they were completely different. "I will pay for your drinks, I have to leave now." Kakashi stated and handed out a few bills from his pocket and left the tavern.