Author Important Note: Due to beta-ing taking awhile, thanks to the wonderful Cute-but-psycho824 for beta-ing my writing. I am releasing chapters before they either completed in beta-ing or raw, these will be updated hopefully within the coming months, I will add an update note to chapters that have been fully checked and revised by my Beta. Hench why I have released two chapters today, since it has been a very long time since I've updated this story, I am sorry for the long wait and I hope this suffices. Thank you for your patience and continuous support.

"All those empty rooms

We could been anywhere, anywhere else

Instead I made a bed with apathy

My heart knew the weight

Ten years worth of dust and neglect

We made our peace with weariness

And let it be.

The moon will a song for me

I loved you like the sun

Bore the shadows that you made

With no light of my own

I shine only with the light you gave me

I shine only with the light you gave me" The moon will sing by The Crane Wives

Chapter 6: There is more to life than books

I sat before the mirror staring down at myself with my dark, muddy eyes. Flushed, apple red cheeks seem to glow and I breathe deeply, agitated at my current condition. My clammy hands clutch a blanket tightly to my shaking from; in some novels written words would call my skin paler than moonlight. My hair clung to my skin as cold shivers rack up my spin; I just continue to look at the person in the mirror. In this state I couldn't read, so instead I entertained myself by looking at my reflection instead.

I rarely look at myself, due to the strange out of body like experience it gave me. My hair was a colour only seen in fictional stories or when one has their hair forcefully dyed. My hair colour was a natural white silver. My face was rounder than the majority of the boys in my class, yet I had a jaw line that made me seem masculine. Eyes that seemed big, had sharpness to them and I frowned. Because I was becoming everything that the Honyakus wanted, a part of me wanted to wipe the mirror and hope, just hope I see someone else.

I guess when you can't have something you want it even more. I never cared much while in the orphanage, because it was entirely my own choice in how I was. I didn't realise how much this was going to affect me. I didn't care about being perceived as a guy, I don't care how people see me. I just don't like other people shaping me into anything but what I want. I guess in a way I am bitter about how Grandpa had forced his ideals onto me, how he wanted me to seem like a man. I didn't get any say in how I am shaped. That left a bitter taste on my tongue.

I shook my head out of my jumble thoughts, besides looking like a mess at the current moment. I knew I looked like a pretty boy to the other students, considering how loud the girls in class talk about it. Beside the broad shoulders, I still had quite a smaller body than the majority of my peers. People like Kyoya still tower over me by a head or two, Mori was a giant in comparison with his lanky limbs. Only around Honey did I not feel as tiny, as he was the shortest person I knew beside myself. Around even my female peers I feel small. A lot of them were early bloomers starting to have their own growth spurts. A few when talking to me hung over with their extra head of height reminding me of my own stature.

Around Adults, I never had let it bother me.

My feet and hands are just as small. School has brought back that feeling of being tiny, this body struggles with growth. I still get ill every so often but my immune system was luckily normal, I'd hate it if it was weak. Being ill just makes me overthink just like right now. My reflection sighs, huffs and glares before hunching back into the blankets as I shiver once more.

A knock at the door awakens me from my stare down with my reflection. I hum in reply and the door opens to Hikori entering the room, his eyes glossing over my bed, his eyes observing the little sanctuary underneath. He turns to me with his sharp emeralds and sighs, "Kid, you seriously need to rest." He says as he wanders over to me.

I hum back with a shrug as I turn my body over him, huffing with the effort as I watch him walk across the room. "Where's …Jon?" I rasp out. A little surprise to have Hikori to be the one to take care of me; it was the first time in my life staying here. He was mainly the driver, when not driving he manned some of the staff.

"He's out with your Grandfather on business matters." He answers honestly, as he leant down in front of me. His hand touches my forehead, wiping away a layer of sweat in progress. "Darn kid, you are no better than this morning."

He must've been the one to put me to bed this morning; I had assumed it was Jonathan. Though I don't know why I had fallen asleep in the library the other night, did all those exams knock me out? At least they were all done now before I got like this. Warm, strong arms wrap around me, picking me up from the floor. "Ah!" I squeak out as the world flows in a dizzying matter, my hand automatically gripping onto Hikori's shirt.

"You're so small." Hikori whispers under his breath as he carries me back to the bed. His steps are slow and careful as he takes me across the room. His scent of tobacco and engine oil filled my lungs as I buried my face in his chest, his body radiated heat that my body begged for.

He lays me down gently into the bed, laying the blanket over top of me and tucking me in. He brings over a cloth and cleans away the sweat around my head and neck, before leaving a new cool cloth atop of my head. "Why, why did you come?" I ask, "You could've…gotten a maid."

His green eyes glaze over me as he smiles softly. "Jonathan assigned me as your new caretaker in his stead." He speaks, he flickers his hand back in his explanation. "And I know how stubborn you can get."

He got me right on the nail there. "Thank you, Hikori." I voice out, as I reach for the sleeves of his suit jacket and clutch the fabric between my fingers. For the first time, I really look at Hikori. His natural pale completion helped bring out his emerald green eyes, his face sharp, chiselled and clean shaven. His fingers look a little yellow now I really took the time to notice. It wasn't surprising, he is a known smoker. His hair was neck length which he always had tied up in a tiny ponytail, he looked almost like anyone's rich man butler beside the small oil stains on his uniform; it wasn't as obvious as he wore an all black suit.

He pulls his face to the left to look away from me as he clutches my hand in his own, his swallows mine up. He sighs, "I'm not going anywhere kid, so sleep." He throws out as with his other hands pulls out a small book from his pocket and begins to read it. I notice it to be a manual for one of the cars in the garage.

I hum and let myself close my hand as I give his hand a squeeze. He squeezes back and with that I find myself slipping into sleep.

I had woken once to Grandpa checking in for a moment, the door slanted open as he looked in. His brow frowns in concern. His lips twitch before speaking to; who I guess was either Jonathan or Hikori before shutting the door close and his footsteps echo as they leave with his voice simmering out. It warms my heart; he had never checked in before when I had been ill in the past.

In the week of slowly getting over my fever, Ayame Jounouchi had dropped off my summer homework to the manor. The girl, the one who I had met when I first went to Ouran and the head of the year had been a good acquaintance of mine, we mainly only ever studied together. It seemed like she liked my continuous need to read and learn. Though, she didn't fully appreciate me being above her and Kyoya on the leader board when it came to exams and tests. Though, I think even Kyoya was a little angered by this factor, seeing the last results I did see him twitch his hand for a moment.

And so summer began with nothing. This is the Honyakus we're talking about, they are workaholics. I don't even think the word summer holiday was in their dictionary. My summer was mainly stuck inside the manor doing my summer homework and catching up on my reading, and don't forget the paperwork and occasional lesson. On an odd occasion, Grandpa would take me out for a meal. His excuse was 'to see me put my etiquette lessons into action.' But we both knew really, we wanted to have a breather from the place for an hour or two.

Besides that, Mori and Honey have been texting me almost every day when they are free and not away in another country on holiday. Though, I held better conversations with Honey as he was the most talkative of the pair, sending me pictures of their holidays together and the things they have been up to. Mori texts were pretty unique to him and very random, especially when he'll send "How are you?" out of nowhere one day, other days it just be "Good morning." Or "Goodnight." They were sweet nonetheless. Both of their texts always left a smile on my lips, I had such good friends.

"What got you smiling, eh Tyler?" Hikori asks as he places his hand on my shoulder, leaning over to my text. It was one of Mori's Good morning texts alongside a picture that Honey sent of Mori watching the birds in their garden, Honey posing in front of the camera with a big smile.

"Just at what my friends sent me." I tell him, as I nudge the phone over to him. There isn't anything to get embarrassed over. "They've been messaging me pretty much every day."

Hikori seems to be looking closely at a picture of the boy's together, he smiles somewhat at my comment. "This is the Morinozuka and Haninozuka boys. " He states. "How did you become friends with boys a year above you?" He passes the Nokia phone back.

I hum a little flustered. "Don't tell Grandpa, but I kept falling asleep in the library, Mori-senpai always woke me in time for class. That's how our friendship started, really."

Hikori chuckles, "It's good to know you have more friends than just books, Kid." He smiles softly. "I was starting to think all you do is read and breathe books, you can make the Master's obsession look normal."

That was true; Sousuke was always seen with a book when he did come home. Especially when he drops in, he'll steal one of Grandpa's personal stash of instant noodles to have for a quick lunch or dinner. He'll only drop in if he was working nearby, he'll eat with a book or two by him as he slurped his noodles down, his eyes never leaving the pages before him. It was a strange thing to walk into for the first time, especially when the years before I never counted on seeing him beside for the Christmas holidays.

"I just love books." I murmur back as I pick up the book that I set before me. "They've been my constant."

Hikori merely pats my head, his eyes seem sad at that statement I spoke.

Later that day, he drags me away from the library to the garage. He wanted me to see the new project that he had been working on; Sousuke had brought some classic car from a junkyard and left it to Hikori to fix. It was one of his favourite hobbies and Sousuke spoiled him with fixing them; since it saved the Honyaku's great amount of money they heavily allowed this hobby of Hikori's. If it benefits them, especially their wallet, they will easily let you do what you want.

Grandpa and Jonathan were once more away on business, leaving me under Hikori's care. Lately, I notice the protective nature the household has shown to me in the last few weeks. I was never alone for long, if not with Hikori or Jonathan, I either was with a tutor or another staff member hovering around me. I was rarely alone these days, even I notice Grandpa never leaves the place without at least Jonathan and a guard. It wasn't overly strange, we are an overly rich family and maybe something had come up that made Grandpa concerned for our safety. This happens often with my peers at school, so really it wasn't questionable.

I sat on one of the stools, as Hikori climbed under the car. He jabs on about the car, its history and anything else he could discuss about the car he was trying to fix before my eyes. Most of what he says enters one ear and leaves the other, as I continue reading the book that I had been rudely interrupted from earlier. His cheerful voice was just as nice as leaving the radio in my bedroom, I felt relaxed and at home as he chatted away. It was a different feel to Jonathan's brotherly affections. Hikori felt more like a gruff father who was scary at first but once you got to know him, he was kind and affectionate in his own way.

It was strange, how I found the staff more like my family than the two main adults that had adopted me. They felt so far away and near impossible to talk to, they were never around and when they were it was far too awkward between us. With Jonathan, there was never any judgement of what I do since I first started living here; he had left his arms wide open. Grandpa, it was like trying to climb a rocky wall. There was a grip but it could still be easy to slip, it was strange now I can sit on that wall and see over and see more of who he is now. Hikori, took a little of DIY to get him to be himself in front of me, it didn't take too long considering I had caught him smoking quite a few times, me not reporting it to Grandpa seemed to ease him up, he started to relax around me. This Hikori was far more human to me than that work persona. Those three are my family here, my constants beside books.

Hikori stops, sitting beside the car with his face smudged black with oil and dirt. He wipes his face with a cloth as he looks over me, his eyes in thought before uttering words that take me away from the book lingering words. "Hey Kid, I noticed. You never ask questions. Why is that?"

I stop, finger laying on the last word I had read. I stare at him, shocked by the question. I breathe a sigh, "To be honest, I don't know either." I answer him, "I just feel that, I don't need to."

Hikori huffs, "You should ask things kid, you're a Honyaku now, there are things you should know." He points out.

"Like what exactly?"

"You remember that you brought over Ootori kid and got in trouble?" He reminds me.

I rub my cheek, "How could I forget." I grumble.

"I thought you had informed your Grandfather like you had me, so I didn't say anything at the time." He tells me, "However the reason why you're Grandfather is weary of the Ootoris is due to complications between your Grandfather and the current head of the company, let just say they found information not meant for their ears."

"I kind of already concluded that." I told him, "I overheard some of their conversation about it, just them worrying if Ootori-san could've found out about anything."

Hikori nodded, "Yes, but your Grandfather doesn't have any relations with the Ootori's. Your father-" I grimace. "Mainly deals with them business wise, your Grandfather will not talk nor look at them."

"They must've had a big falling out." I mutter, I remember finding tucked away between some book pages in Grandpa's office was a picture of the much younger Yoshio Ootori and Grandpa shaking hands, both smiling at the other. "They had been good business partners right?"

Hikori nods, "Yes, but somewhere down the line it broke when Ootori listened to information that isn't is."

"What was that information that he overheard?"

"That's anyone's guess; you know how the Honyakus are." He wavers his hand with the cloth, "They conceal everything."

Considering they were able to conceal my gender from the public eye was evidence enough to me. I merely nod, "Was there anything else I should know?"

Hikori clicks his tongue in thought, as he rubs his tools clean. "Your Grandfather is especially good friends with Suoh; He's your chairman of Ouran academy."

I shut my book with a fold of the corner as my marker. "I also know he's president of Suoh Enterprises. Though, I didn't know he had any close relations to Grandpa." I put the book down on a stool beside me.

"They mainly converse over the phone, so it's understandable you wouldn't know." Hikori tells me, "Let's say, your Grandfather was one of the few people to stand up for Suoh. The Honyakus are all for breaking old traditional rules when it comes to business; they are a heavy backer for Suoh's love choices."

I hum at that, as I lean back in my seat. "Yeah, that sounds like the Honyakus alright."

Days passed by with Grandpa introducing business families into the manor. It wasn't too strange; he had done it a handful of times in the past, what was different was that they came almost every day of this week. Most came when I had a tutor session in the library, so most I did get to do was greet them. The ladies always squeal, making Grandpa smirk as I force a smile on my lips and politely leave. A text from Mori or Hani always made me feel better after.

One of the guests had shocked me. Standing before me are Yuzuru Suoh and Tamaki Suoh. Grandpa was talking to them happily; Yuzuru had a hand on Tamaki's shoulder in an affectionate way. Tamaki look a little like a fish out of water, as both parental figures talk merrily. His eyes caught mine and his flowery smile took over.

"You must be Tyler!" he exclaimed with his hand outstretched for mine, I grasp his softly. "I've heard a lot about you from father." He continues to really shake my hand; I wince at his forceful nature.

"Yes it's lovely to finally meet, Tamaki." I spoke to him in French. "I've also heard alo-"He pulls me tightly into a hug, taking away my oxygen as I gagged on my words and spit. "T-Tamaki?"

His grips tighter as I turn red in embarrassment, I was not used to affections from a stranger. I might know him as a fictional character, I don't know this him. Even with my friends, I have always found it uncomfortable. He shakes for a moment, and then he takes a breath and pulls away. "Thank you, Tyler." He utters as he smiles warmly.

I fluster under his gaze and confused about what had just quickly transpired. Suoh-san chuckles, as he pats both our shoulders. "I hope that you can be a good friend to Tamaki, Tyler."

I guess that promise to myself to keep away from the main story is broken completely now. I try not to sigh as I smile at the two, "Of course, a friend of my Grandpa is a friend of mine."

Tamaki seemed to glow at what I said, as Grandpa pats my back. "Don't you have a tutor session to get to?" he grumbled at me.

I nod, "I do," I reply as I turn to the two Suohs, I bow my head to the both of them. "It was lovely to meet the both of you; however I must take my leave."

They bow their head back with their own polite goodbyes. Thus I am taken away by Jon to the library where little old Inori waited for our regular class. Something's just don't change as much as you'd think, just the amount of people entering my life do.

A couple more days pass by relatively slow and filled with lessons and handfuls of the regular paperwork. That's when Jon sits beside me slipping over another stack of papers, I groan in annoyance. Every time I felt I was getting somewhere, Grandpa added more. Jon chuckles as he starts to check over the pile that I had finished and begins to sort them into their categorized sets. "You're almost done, Tyler." He points out, "That's the last lot I brought."

I sigh, thankful for that heads up. "That's good; I was thinking it was never going to end." I mutter. The scratching of my pen is much louder than my own voice. The radio chattered away in the background like a soft hum in my bedroom, it brought life into the room that mainly only echoed pen scratching, shakes of paper and the flipping of pages.

Jon stops my pen, something he's never done in the time since I've lived here. I let go at the command, let it drop as I turned to him with what I bet was a face of bafflement. He lets go and sets his hands back together. "It's been a long time since we've both talked." He says, in which was the truth. The first year, we spoke almost every day even if it was about nothing. He had been my best friend, my brother in those days but with Grandpa declining health, Grandpa needed Jon more than I did, making our time much more infrequent together.

"It has been." Is all I can say back. I find myself fiddling with my sleeve, why was he acting like this? I wonder.

He smiles, the same soft smile I have always been shown. He reaches out and touches my hand with the fading scar, where the ruler once hit. "Tyler, we're, let's say..." he begins, trying to say to find the correct words. "Concerned about you." He finishes.

"Huh?" I splutter, confused to what they can be so concerned about.

Jon coughs, as if to clear his throat. "For someone so young, you don't act out. You don't ask for anything-" I couldn't help but smirk at that, Books Dearest Jon, Books. "You don't go out to see friends; you just stay in, read, fill paperwork up, eat and sleep. You barely ever talk to any of the staff unless necessary, beside Hikori or me. You're 12, Tyler; sometimes I think you forget that."

The smirk drops as he continues, I never notice how strange a person I must seem to Honyakus at times. I know they like that I didn't act like most children did, I was far easier to converse with in comparison. Though, I guess my habits might seem unhealthy for my age especially in the eyes of Jon and Hikori. The ones who have spent a good amount of time with me, the ones who have noticed the odd quirks that I don't change. He was right; all I did do was work, study and read. I wasn't really living in their eyes, but reading was all I wanted. It made the cold and quiet nights just more bearable, people come and go but a good book will always be there. Then I realise my problem.

"But that's me." I tell him, I found myself spilling out for the first time in this life. "That's me, Jon. I don't know how to be anything else." I blab on, tongue slipping the thoughts I had for years. "People come and go but I will always have a book, they have always anchored me." Those are sentences I have repeated alongside I'm a girl easily bribed by books.

Jon fingers grasp my shoulder as he leans over, pulling me into a hug. "No, no. Because you're not there anymore, you're not in the orphanage anymore. I promise we are your constants. We, the Honyakus and staff are your constants." He murmurs to me, he holds me close and I find myself gripping tightly the back of his shirt, tight between my fingers. Tears I never knew I had, dripped from my eyes as I realised what he had told me. "Let us anchor you." He whispers as I cry deeply, my body shakes and trembles. I felt relieved and happy by his words, words I had hoped to hear since I was little.

Words that meant more than anyone could ever understand. As I let go, Jon slowly drifting apart from me, I found myself telling him these exact words. "You better keep to that promise." I tell him, drying my tears with my handkerchief I had in my pockets.

"I promise." He says ruffling my hair.

This chapter is partially been Beta'd.

Chapter 5 Reviews:

Bored411: I can't wait for her to eventually interact fully with the crew! Thank you :3

Mr Meowington: Thank you so much, I am so happy to hear that I am able to give you a sense of familiarize with the relationships. I wanted them to be come across as such, I didn't want them all to be easy, since no relationship is fully without its trails. Once again, thank you for continuously supporting this fanfic!

Animie02fruit: Thank you, I'm trying my best to make a story people can relate too and symphonise with, relationships are the core of any story. I am always up for criticism as a learning writer, so if I ever come across like that, please be honest with me. Thank you once more.

James Oliver Wood: Well here's the next chapter!

CritiqueGirl101: Thank you, I always aim to make original content so I'm happy to hear!

Elisablackcat: Tyler, Mori and Honey friendship is my joy to write, I bet he did lol. That's the point, we all had family we argue with or done things that we hate but the good kind, come back and say "sorry." And grow, I want characters and people to grow in my stories. Thank you!