The days were getting shorter but for Mariah, every moment felt so much longer. Suddenly, there was always something to do, somewhere to be. She hardly had time to stop and think before moving on to the next thing on her to-do list.

Which was fine. Busy was how she liked it.

Wiping the sweat from her brow at the end morning run, the chilly air fogged in front of her with each breath. The street lights were still on as she jogged back up her driveway. Her mom, already in her car ready to leave for work, waved as she passed.

Breakfast was an apple, swallowed in large bites before jumping in and out of the shower. Somehow, she'd managed to streamline her morning routine so that she was actually at the bus stop before the bus arrived and not just barely managing to catch it. Once on the bus, she pulled out a book in an effort to stay ahead of the game. She wouldn't let what happened in her Psych class happen ever again. Yes, everything was as it should be.

She was still at the top of her class, still tutoring Ray three days a week, and still keeping up with Mariam and Julia.

She had lived up to her promise to her parents and created the perfect balance, once again proving herself to be more than capable.

Except for one fact: Mariah knew she was lying.

Mariah leaned back against the uncomfortable bus seat, unable to focus on the material in front of her. In the quieter moments, the pit in her stomach gnawed at her, growing as it feasted on her exhaustion and anxiety.

Everything was perfect, but nothing was right.

Ever since that horrible weekend she didn't like to think about, there had been something unspoken between her and Julia, and by extension Mariam. They talked, of course, but there was something Julia wasn't admitting to, and Mariah couldn't figure it out.

The day after that horrible day, Julia confronted her in her bedroom about Tala's interactions with Hilary in particular. So, being the good friend, Mariah told her everything that had happened from Hilary's flat tire to warning Tala to leave Hilary alone.

She hadn't expected Julia to be happy about intervening on her behalf but she hadn't expected her to be so angry, either.

As soon as Mariah finished, Julia snapped, "Why did you even need to tell him that? He can date whoever he wants."

Mariah opened her mouth to argue but Mariam interrupted, pushing Julia away. "Whatever, Jules. Mariah was just looking out for you. Stop picking fights over that idiot."

Julia shrugged and left soon after, claiming she was over it, but if their rigid conversations since revealed anything it would be that she was not, in fact, over it. Which grated on Mariah's nerves. If Julia had something to say, she should say it. How many times had they warned her that Tala wasn't worth the trouble he caused her? Too many times for her to be this angry.

Yet, Mariah knew that Julia would relent eventually. Tala was a tender spot for her, no matter if the situation was good or bad. Any prodding at it usually caused a reaction. Mariah just needed to hang back until then. In the meantime, school needed to come first.

Which...wasn't as easy as it once was. Her classes were getting harder, quizzes and tests and exams and long-term projects were coming at her left and right. She broke down and bought a weekly planner to keep up with it all. And if her parents saw everything she had scheduled, they'd probably worry about her health. More than they already did. There were no blank spaces, every moment from five a.m. when she woke up for her run to when she finished studying before bed, was planned down to the minute almost.

And even if her schedule wasn't a problem, then her classmates certainly were.

For the past two weeks, anytime she looked around, she caught eyes darting away from her only to drift back over moments later. People laughed behind hands and over shoulders where they thought she couldn't see them.

At first, she rightly thought it was a result of the weekend. Mariah knew it'd get around school and she'd be at the center of it, and that it would only supply more evidence of why she didn't belong.

But going on the second week...it seemed a bit much. Normally another rumor would have come up and taken its place by then.

And if she could ignore their bizarre behavior, then there was Ray and their...friendship?

She'd had a long talk with Lee about it. He still wasn't in favor of Ray and nothing she said could convince him otherwise.

"It's not him, 'Riah. It's his background."

"That's a little prejudice, don't you think?"

"I don't care if it is," Lee huffed over the phone. She'd called him late and she could tell he had to pull himself away from something to speak with her. Her heart bowed under the weight of missing him, missing the time when he was immediately available to her. "He could be the nicest person in the world but it'll mean nothing when his friends and family come into play."

"His friends are really nice and Max even vouched for him,"

"Mariah," he said, sighing as if he were reasoning with a child.

"What?"

"What are you hoping to gain from this?"

Mariah didn't say anything. There was nothing she could say. The question he posed stayed with her the entire night, even after he hung up.

What was she hoping to gain? A school friend? A friend for life?

The obvious answer was just a friend, of course. Ray was nice and generous. He stood up to his mom over her – something she was keenly aware was still an issue despite the fact that they never talked about it. He asked her to hang out all the time and when she brought up problems, he adjusted so that they could continue as smoothly as possible.

She wasn't blind to his efforts. And as much as she wanted to be, she wasn't blind to the way he looked at her right before he smiled; the curious, intrigued glint to his eye like he'd found a new way to solve an old problem.

But was that what she wanted?

As she tried to imagine a future where she continued to have Ray as a friend, there was nothing. Empty darkness. A void.

She was standing on a cliff and on one side there was everything she was familiar with – her friends and family, her home, the image of her achieving her goals one by one.

And on the other side was Ray, standing in the middle of the darkness, smiling at her, holding out his hand, an offering of friendship. The shadows swirled around him, lapping at his feet and concealing his face at times.

So, she imaged taking a step back from the edge, going toward what she knew. But very quickly, everything became distorted and what she thought she knew wasn't the same anymore.

Mariah didn't know what her subconscious was trying to tell her but it left her hugely unsettled and anxious. Some nights, she lay awake, thinking if only she could skip over the mess that was high school and flash forward to the life she was going to create for herself. She would in a heartbeat. No questions. She wouldn't even regret missing any of the important bits, not that there was any left for her. Once Mariah set her sights on the goal of higher university, she gave having the traditional high school experience. She'd work hard and study harder.

Sometimes – most of the time – she thought that's all high school was: the unimportant bits. She never bought into the 'it's the best years of your life' line. She knew the best years of her life were yet to come.

But ever since Ray entered her life...there was a part, deep down and far away from her conscious mind, that if she were to analyze it, she feared she'd find that she wouldn't mind slowing down for a bit.

For Mariah, school had never been about making friends and creating memories. But then, in her final year, Ray came along, and suddenly she was looking forward to lunches with him and worried when he said Hilary was acting weird and laughed when Tyson put straws in his mouth and pretended to be a walrus.

There were so many reasons making friends with any of them at this time wasn't a good idea, but the truth was...

The truth was she felt a pang. A thump. In her heart.

She hadn't said anything to anybody, but it was there.

When Ray had smiled at her and said they should hang out more away from school and away from their friends, her heart... leaped or thudded or something but there was a reaction.

And it shouldn't be reacting. This was not the time for it. She was getting ready to move on with her life and leave this horrible nightmare behind and here he was...causing heart palpitations.

She wouldn't stand for it.

So, Mariah did what she always did when the bus came to her morning stop. She put those thoughts and feelings away and pretending everything was normal.

Everything was exactly as it should be. Perfectly normal.

Because they would all move on with their lives and eventually Ray would just be a weird part of her high school memories. Admittedly, a good part.

Sauntering through the campus, Mariah kept her eyes trained in front of her, determined to at least look like she didn't have a care in the world. While taking the long way around to her locker while ignoring the eyes that normally followed her. She wasn't avoiding the parking lot where she suspected she'd find her new friends, she just wanted to enjoy the view from the other side of the campus. Of course.

Catching one girl openly staring, Mariah made it a point to stare back until she looked away. Maybe she'd have to do something drastic to remind them who she was. Something to ponder over when her mind needed distracting.

She rounded the corner, heading toward her locker when she stopped dead, unprepared for Ray to be leaning against her door. He was unusually alone this time, which both scared and excited Mariah for reasons she didn't have time to dwell on.

When he saw her, he smiled. Mariah knew her mind would create a memory around it. It seemed she had a nice little collection of all the moments he flashed her that smile, that played like a montage, each moment fading into the next and then replaying when it was done. Over and over until she was forced from her thoughts.

"What's up?" she asked once she got close enough. He moved away so that she could open up her locker and it gave her the moment she needed to collect her scattered thoughts of him and put them back in their box.

"We need to talk," he whispered, leaning in but careful not to be too close.

Strange words from the boy. He usually wasn't so coy and secretive.

"We have lunch and a tutoring session tonight. What's so important that you had to track me down?"

Mariah bit her tongue, yelling at herself for being harsher than intended.

"Can we just go somewhere?"

She looked at him. He was tense and stressed. She normally only saw him get that way when he was working on a problem he couldn't figure out.

The last thing she wanted was to be alone with him. The more time she spent in his company, the more she was drawn into his universe. "Sure," she agreed.

After finishing at her locker, she followed him to his car, trying to get him to open up but Ray was abnormally resistant. She tried not to notice how everyone watched them go. Once the doors were shut, she turned to him, demanding an explanation.

Still, he hesitated. "I just found out about this last night," he started as a way to fill the silence.

"What?"

"I guess it started after that weekend, but there's a rumor going around that we're...dating."

Mariah took a moment to process what he said. "Oh, is that it?"

"That's it?"

She slouched in her seat. "Rumors start all the time. And after what happened, I'm surprised more haven't come out."

He took a deep breath. "That's not the entirety of it, Mariah."

"No?"

"It's not just that we're dating or whatever," he continued, taking his time finding the words. Mariah wanted to rip them from him. "But the main part of the rumor is that you're just climbing the social ladder, so to speak."

"Climbing the social ladder?"

"Yeah, it means, like-"

"I know what it means,"

"Right."

His eyes watched her carefully. Slowly, Mariah started to piece together things that she'd heard whispered without context, the stares she'd been getting, everything that had happened.

Before none of it really fit together and so she could ignore it. Now, she understood.

She shook her head. "It doesn't matter. They'll think what they want."

"Are you sure?"

"What else can I do? If we deny it, they'll call us liars."

"Yeah, but there must be something we can do. I hate the idea of them thinking of you that way."

Mariah's lips twisted into an ironic smile. "They will always think of me this way," she said. But you don't, do you? Again, she appreciated the way he didn't let others influence his thinking. She could tell by the way he frowned that he wasn't happy with her answer, and that he was trying to think of a way to fix it, to make it better.

"There's nothing to do about it, Ray,"

"Let's study at your place from now on,"

Mariah laughed, surprised by his immediate and outlandish response. "How will that help? They'll just think we're sneaking off to be together."

"Since when do you care?"

He had a point.

"We don't need to go to the library anymore now that we're friends. Plus, you could get more studying done. And we won't have to deal with these guys looking at us all the time,"

His points were getting better.

Now she was the one thinking. Ray didn't need her watching over him as he did before. Now, all she had to do was explain, give a few examples, and then correct any mistakes he made on his homework. It was more like they were study buddies than anything.

"Okay," she said.

"You sound unsure?"

"Well, I wasn't ever expecting to introduce anyone from this part of my life to my parents, but you've already broken that rule. I guess there's no stopping you when you want something, huh?"

Ray smiled. "No, not really."

Mariah rolled her eyes, telling herself the smile meant nothing.

Now that she knew why people were staring, it was harder to scare them away. Before lunch, Queen appeared at her side, gunmetal eyes narrowed in their usual haughty fashion.

"Just wondering when you decided to rise up the class ranks. I could've helped if I'd known you were interested." Her words were smooth as silk but Mariah had known King and Queen for too long to believe anything about them was soft. While she usually tolerated them for their generally realistic view of the world, she didn't support their selfish desire to entertain themselves at the expensive of everyone else.

And she had sworn years ago that she'd never become one of their victims.

"I've always been at the top of my class, so where would I be rising to?" Mariah said, daring Queen to challenge her claim.

Queen tsked, twisting around so that she was on Mariah's other side, "Story is golden boy Ray Kon and the bad girl Mariah are officially an item. But watch out, she's only after him for his sterling reputation and good looks."

Mariah thought of a hundred things she could say, and only a third of them would have landed her in the principal's office, which she considered progress on her part. She held her tongue and rolled her eyes, signaling the end of the conversation. With people like Queen and her brother, it was always best to be the last one to react. Anything else only gave them more power.

Queen gave up, turned on her heel, and walked past King who watched from the end of the hall. He blew her a kiss before following his sister around the corner.

Mariah sneered, disgusted by their actions.

After lunch, Mariah was seriously considering tracking down the kid who started the rumor, already fed up with the attention. She knew realistically there was no use in trying; she'd never find the source. The fact didn't stop her from dreaming of finding them and wrapping her hands around their throats. And squeezing. Just a little.

As she walked down the halls between classes, Mariah set her sights ahead. Now more than ever, she'd need her determination to keep her from collapsing under their scrutiny. Not since her first year at the school, when nobody knew her name and only knew her address, did she feel like she was a target. She'd made her mark and earned her place. And now she felt like that same target was painted there again, leaving her open for an attack.

Emily stopped by her desk in one of the classes they shared. "If I'd known tutoring was so much fun, I wouldn't have turned him down."

The others around them who heard her comment laughed to themselves. Mariah pretended she couldn't be bothered and shooed the girl away with a careless hand.

But during class, she imagined Ray giving Emily his smiles and it burned.

By the end of the day, Mariah couldn't wait to leave the nightmare behind. She beat Ray to his car and threw her stuff in the back alongside his. While he navigated the car out of the parking lot, she fiddled with the stereo, letting the music carry her stress out the window.

"You know, I'm getting used to being carted around," she shouted over the noise.

"Good,"

Mariah, for all her efforts, got caught up looking at him. His dark bangs blew wild in the wind and the sun streaming in gave him a halo that only seemed to make his eyes glow a deeper gold. One arm rested on the wheel while the other leaned on the middle console.

And if they were together, she'd reach forward and twist her fingers into his.

Mariah made it a point to look away.

There was no reason to walk down that path. Her time in high school was almost done and he'd be just a memory.

She turned the music up to keep herself from talking. Before she knew it and not a moment too soon, they pulled in front of her house and he turned the car, along with the music, off.

"Everything okay?"

Mariah turned to him. "Yeah, why?"

He nodded to the house. "You look more worried this time than last?"

She was. She should have called her dad to let him know she was bringing Ray over. Instead, she talked herself out of it every chance she got.

Now there was no getting out of it.

"Nope, everything's perfect." She grinned, grabbing her bag from the back and getting out of the car.

He followed her up the porch and through the door. Her dad looked up from his place over the stove when he heard the door open, greeting her with a bright welcome before his smile dimmed as his eyes landed on Ray.

"We decided to study here today," she said casually as if bringing a friend from school – not to mention a boy – not to mention the son of his college girlfriend – was a normal thing. "I hope that's okay,"

He was clearly uncomfortable and it gave Mariah a taste of what Ray might be going through in his own home every night, how difficult it must be. She looked to him from the corner of her eyes, seeing his profile as he looked straight ahead.

When her dad wiped his hands clean, he nodded, pulling the smile back. "I guess it is," he said. "I'll let you know when dinner's ready."

Mariah smiled, relieved. Grabbing Ray's arm, she started to pull him toward her room, eager to leave the uncomfortable air. However, her efforts to disappear were hindered when Ray didn't move, his attention on what her dad was cooking.

"What are you making?"

Mariah watched him as he walked toward the kitchen without regard for her. Her dad seemed as surprised as she was.

"Uh," her dad started, "there's baked chicken meatballs to go with the spaghetti and pesto. And parmesan cheese at the end."

"That sounds amazing,"

If Mariah couldn't see his face, she would have thought he was drooling. "You don't have any allergies, do you?" she asked. She'd never seen him so interested in something before. Maybe he was worried?

"Oh, no. Not at all," he laughed. "I've just always been interested in cooking. I used to help my mom, but it's been a few years since she's let me."

Mariah's eyes darted to her dad, worried about his reaction to the mention of Ray's mom, but he didn't seem bothered. Instead, he smiled affectionately. "She's a terrific chef," he said. "Taught me a lot back then."

A heavy silence fell over them as what he said registered. Ray seemed to suddenly remember who her dad was while her dad remembered who he was talking to.

Again, Mariah reached for Ray, hooking her arm through his and pulling. "Let's go," she said cheerfully with a smile, hoping to break the tension.

He came with her this time. As soon as she was sure he was following, she dropped her arm and lead him down to her room. She closed the door at the top of the stairs and watched as he slowly walked down the stairs and took in the messy state of her room.

"It's exactly as you described."

"Yeah, well a liar I am not." She laughed. "There's only one chair, so you can take the desk and I'll take on the floor. Make yourself at home,"

Mariah started clearing a space for her to spread out her books. She watched Ray from the corner of her eye as he gingerly picked around her cluttered desk. "What's this?" He held up her giant whiteboard, covered in the equation she was working through the night before.

"That's my homework. Scary, huh?"

"Hurts just looking at it,"

"Don't worry, you probably won't ever get there."

He laughed. "You calling me stupid?"

"I wouldn't call you a genius,"

Happy with the space she created, she took the whiteboard and started erasing it to start fresh for him. Ray continued looking around.

"This room is pretty impressive,"

She tried to imagine what it looked like through new eyes. The movie and music posters collage, pictures of her friends over the years, clippings from magazines, it all overlapped, almost impossible to decipher. She had a small collection of textbooks bought second had from the library stacked against one wall, mostly about different mathematic theories and philosophies. In one corner was the exercise equipment her brother left behind.

"Yeah, the piles and piles of clothes are really critical to my design,"

"They really bring everything together," he agreed, laughing still. "But I meant more about privacy."

The way his laughter faded and his eyes watched her carefully caught Mariah off guard. The air suddenly felt electric, like it could explode if she said the wrong thing.

She hid her thoughts behind laughter. "It's not like we're doing anything down here but studying,"

"Your parents don't mind?"

"No, of course not. They trust me." That was the truth. Kind of. "They know that I won't do anything stupid."

It wasn't that she'd never been alone with a boy. There had been opportunities, ones she had to create for herself considering her brother's watchful eyes. But even she had to admit that being alone with Ray now was different than those other times.

Because even she had to admit, when it came to Ray, she hadn't always made the smartest decisions.

Or at least she would if only she weren't lying to herself.

I want to apologize for being late posting this chapter. I missed my normal posting schedule because I was not feeling well, so if you were expecting and waiting for this chapter, I'm sorry that it's taken so long. I hope you enjoy and if you have any thought's you'd like to share, please feel free. I would love to hear from you. What you like, what you don't like, anything. Thank you for reading.