"The Big Switch-a-roo."
Chapter 3
"John's whining leads him to discover something about Mycroft."
"I hope you're happy." John grumbled to the man sitting on the opposite armchair, polishing a knife that wouldn't look out of place in those 'assassin' games the kids play these days. "You successfully doomed us all."
"Whatever do you mean by that, Dr. Watson?" Mycroft asked, his tone light and innocent, as if he didn't just give the most unstable man in London power to control an entire Country, if not, the World in its entirety.
"Don't play dumb, it doesn't suit you." His sandy haired companion, scolded. "And it's John. We're going to be flat-mates for a month, I'm not letting you call me by my job title that entire time."
"If that will make you happy, then so be it." The older Holmes brother simply smiled that infuriating dominating smile he was known for, which successfully managed to irritate the doctor even more than he already was. "I just didn't think we were on a first-name basis yet, that's all."
John snorted at that.
"Because we clearly just got to know each other." The doctor grumbled. "It's not like we've been acquaintances for years now."
"Your sarcasm was noticed and taken into account." The red-haired man said rather forcefully, his eyes sharp as they glared into John's own. "You may stop now."
"Does it mean I have to call you by your job title too, Mr. Minor-Position-in-the-Government-witch-translates-to-King-of-England Holmes?" But the army doctor decided to push his luck a little more knowing that, because he's Sherlock's best friend, no harm will come to him from the elder Holmes brother.
Mycroft actually blistered at the long, yet strangely accurate, title the smaller man gifted him with.
"That's not funny, John." He hissed.
"Really? I thought it was hilarious myself, Mycroft."
The two men glowered at each other for a solid second before returning to their previous occupations: Mycroft to polishing his weapon and John to complaining about the oncoming end of the world.
"I can't believe you actually agreed to this." The small doctor muttered, his face covered with his hands. "You were supposed to be the smart one, what happened to being the smart one?!"
"I am the smart one." the man's Gentleman status didn't allow him to add the 'you twat' that begged to be placed there, but John knew if Mycroft could add it and get away with it, he would. "But that doesn't stop me from also being an opportunist." Putting the knife up into the light to inspect it for damage, the elder Holmes continued. "I saw an opportunity to get dear old Mummy off my back for a solid month with little to no effort on my part, and I took it."
"That's really wonderful, Mycroft." The sarcasm in his voice has never been thicker, nor more evident. "But could this golden opportunity of yours not involve allowing your irresponsible, overgrown toddler of a brother control over the United Kingdom?!" John then ran a hand through his hair. "Remind me again, why did you thing this was a good idea?"
"Stop overreacting, John." Mycroft's ever calm, ever controlled voice did nothing to calm the doctor's nerves. "Or you'll give yourself a rather nasty heart attack."
"Oh, so you don't think Sherlock will cause mass destruction, like a five-year-old on sugar high, that he absolutely won't take advantage of the fact that he has the power and influence to do whatever he wants and nobody would dare to stop him, and, instead, will calmly sit down behind your desk and fill out tons of paper work." The army man gave his new flat-mate an unimpressed stare and grumbled. "And here I thought I was the stupid one out of the two of us."
Mycroft just let out a long-suffering sight.
"There is no need for insults, John."
John just snorted again.
"Clearly there is if you still don't realize just 'endangered' the Englishman race became, the minute you shook hands with your brother!"
The older man just looked at him, perplexed.
"We are endangered?" He asked, completely missing the point.
The doctor just threw his hands in the air with an anguished scream.
"Bloody hell, Mycroft!"
"Alright, alright." The fox haired man finally conceded. "I do understand your concern, John. Truly, I do. But you have to trust me when I tell you there is nothing to worry about."
"If you can dismiss the 'annihilation of all that is human' as one would do a small bug that they found on their shoe, then yes, I suppose there isn't." The ex-army doctor was relentless, clearly having no intention to stop his insults before the point he was trying to make got through the older man's thick skull.
But by this point Sherlock's older brother has lost all patience he had reserved for this rather one-sided conversation they seemed to be having, and John has suddenly found his Adams apple being held hostage by a rather nicely polished, and familiar looking, knife.
"Perhaps you should actually listen to me first before you judge my actions too harshly, doctor." Mycroft's pissed off voice hissed form behind his ear, laced with more emotion than a man dubbed 'Ice Man' should be able to express. "Do you really think I would just leave a man with such disregard to authority and rules as my brother in charge of my daily job, without making sure his, undoubtedly, irresponsible actions don't end up drowning my beautiful country?" John heard a 'tsk'. "Despite what you may think occurred yesterday, the two of us actually discussed this situation in great detail." He then added, as if reading the medic's mind. "Even if you couldn't hear us."
After that the stinging pressure on his neck was gone and the poor doctor could breathe normally once again. Rubbing the spot touched by the knife, John glared suspiciously at Mycroft, who appeared to be back in his place on Sherlock's armchair, polishing the damned weapon as if nothing happened.
He knows it's been a while since he last wore his military uniform, but reflexes gained from months spent on the brutal frontlines of the Afghanistan war should have warned him of the upcoming attack. And it wasn't as if he we allowed those instincts to expire, if anything his time spent running after murderers with Sherlock only made them even stronger, and yet, despite all that, Mycroft managed to noiselessly sneak up on him, an experienced war veteran, without being noticed.
A trick like that required skill and battlefield experience, two things he would have never thought the older man would have. Mycroft seemed like someone who didn't like to get his hands dirty, he obviously has minions and little brother for that, so it didn't make sense for him to have abilities that classify him as a professional assassin.
That train of thought got the blond thinking…just how little he actually knew about the elder Holmes.
All he knew was what Sherlock was willing to share which, in of itself, isn't very much since the curly haired man would rather choke on a porcupine than speak about his older brother in sentences that aren't composed entirely of curses, and things he found out on his own such as the man's fondness of umbrellas and almost Big Bother-like stalking tendencies.
But other than that?
He didn't even know the man's favorite color, let alone anything concerning his past.
When John blinked again his new flat-mate has apparently disappeared into the kitchen to make some tea. Hardly a difficult deduction to make, especially with the kettle whistling to the high heavens.
The ex-army doctor smirked.
If he knew anything about how a 'Holmes' works, it's that they liked to give beverage-shaped apologies whenever they thought they screwed up.
It looked like Mycroft 'Ice Man' Holmes was feeling a bit guilty about the little loss of temper and decided to offer tea as a peace offering.
That alone showed that he wasn't nearly as bad as Sherlock described him to be.
His suspicions were confirmed when the fox-haired Homes appeared in the doorframe with a rather sheepish look on his face, and a tray with two steaming teacups in his hands.
Perhaps it was time John Watson heard the older man's side of the story.
AN: Hi! Sorry about the long wait and about Sherly not being in this chappy, but I PROMISE the next chapter will be ALL about that little rapscallion and his attempts to fill his big brother's shoes (cross my heart and hope to die!)
See ya soon!
JA107
Over and out!