Chapter XXVII

Manhattan, NY

Next day

She didn't sleep much after Castle left, so for the second day in a row she was running on fumes. Battle-ready and battle-weary all at once and it was barely seven in the morning.

She used to be so good at putting things into different compartments. Of not letting her dating life interfere with her work, but Castle had made that impossible, so she came to the one place that she always came back to when doubt and uncertainty clouded her path.

Her mother's final resting place.

She toyed with her mother's ring in the sunny but chilly morning air, as if the precious metal could show her the clarity she was seeking.

I'm so close, Mom. Closer than I've been in a long time.

I don't understand why it's suddenly so hard to push forward. It's what I've wanted since the day I put on my badge. So why does it feel so…empty?

She brushed away a tear. She'd give anything just to have her back for five minutes. Anything.

But instead of hearing the soft, familiar lilt of her mother's voice, it was Castle's that popped into her head. Entirely unwelcome.

"You don't even care that your partners are risking their jobs too. It's like I don't recognize you anymore."

She wished she could swat it away with the same ease as the mosquito that landed on the sleeve of her leather jacket when she first got here. But instead his voice droned on in her head, making her irrationally angry.

Her frustrated tears messed up the make-up she'd forced herself to put on this morning, and fell down onto to dry grass below.

I won't let you down, Mom.

I promise.

SoHo, NYC

"Look it's a launch party, not a corporate presentation, there's not much I need to rehearse," Castle told his publisher over the phone for the second time this morning. Before he'd even had his first coffee. "I know it's the first one in almost four years. Okay, fine. I'll swing by after breakfast. Go over the order of events and be sure I know whom I'm supposed to schmooze with."

He ended the call with a sigh and rubbed the last vestige of sleep from his eyes, only to see Alexis, still in her pyjamas, standing in front of him.

"So?" she asked him. "Did you buy the ring you showed me?"

She looked so excited that it was hard to answer with a subtle shake of his head.

As part of Operation Last-Minute Proposal, he'd taken two of Beckett's rings, costume jewelry that he'd borrowed from her jewelry box when she wasn't looking and hopefully wouldn't miss, in order to get the right size. Then he'd been convinced he'd found the perfect engagement ring at a small, exquisite SoHo jeweller. A three-stone platinum ring that was strong, beautiful and elegant, just like the wearer. Even Alexis had squealed in approval when he'd shown it to her.

"No?" Alexis looked almost as disappointed as he felt.

"No. We never had the talk we planned to have."

"So things didn't work out between you two? Are you breaking up?"

"What?" Castle rested his elbow on the kitchen island and cupped his face in his palm. It was a good question. He eyed his daughter's pretty face and wished he could give her a good answer. "I hope not. I don't want to."

"But…?"

"We did have a fight." He sighed. "Sometimes the people you love, they do things that terrify you and all you wanna do is pull them back from the ledge and make them stop. 'Cause you can't stand to see them get hurt."

"What do you mean?"

"She's tracking down the man who shot her, knowing he's looking to finish the job."

"Oh my God…" Alexis was horror-struck.

"I tried to stop her so she kicked me out."

"The NYPD is letting her do that?"

"Kick me out?"

"No…chase the guy who shot her."

Castle made a face. "That's the other problem. She's doing it without telling her boss."

"Oh…" Alexis stepped around to drape her arms over him. "That's not good."

"No."

"Is it bad that I'm happy you're not on the case, Dad? 'Cause I don't want you to get hurt?"

He turned around and gave her a lop-sided smile, grateful for the warmth of her hug. "No. It's not. I know exactly how you feel."

"So, is the launch party still on tonight?"

"Yeah…of course." He'd been looking forward to this for months. His first novel in years. One that was full of glowing advance reviews and had the potential to become his next big series. Black Pawn was sparing no expense tonight.

And now he was dreading it. How was he supposed to celebrate the launch of Nikki Heat without the woman who'd inspired her?

"Is Kate gonna be there?

"I don't know…probably not."

Alexis looked sad for him. "I'm sorry."

He mustered a smile for her. "Don't be. You and Gram are gonna be there. What more could I ask for? It's gonna be a great night."

Of course she saw right through him. So she planted a kiss on his cheek and gave him another hug.

12th Precinct, NYC

The boys were already at the precinct when she got there and they had good news, reminding her that she had two of the best partners she could ever hope for.

Thanks to the car-rental key chain that Esposito caught on the video, they actually got their needle in a haystack.

His name, or at least his cover ID, was Cole Maddox, and he still had the car. A car that they could track through the rental agency's built-in GPS.

They had him.

Kate Beckett could feel the adrenaline pumping through her veins. She was wide awake now.

"You stay on grid," she told Ryan. "Let us know if he moves. Espo, you're comin' with me."

Ryan rose from his seat. "Whoa, whoa, whoa…what are you doing?" he asked in disbelief. "If you wanna do this, you have to do it right. You put a team on that car and you bring back-up with you!"

Beckett didn't agree. There had been corrupt cops involved in this since the start, and who was to say that advertising this takedown wouldn't bring one of them out of the woodwork. She would not risk anyone alerting Maddox now that they were this close to capturing him.

She told Ryan as much.

But Ryan wouldn't back down either. "With all due respect, this guy put a bullet in your heart and then disappeared into the ether. You cannot go into this unprepared."

"Unprepared?" she questioned. "I've been preparing for this for thirteen years."

She could hear Ryan trying to convince Esposito too, but she was already halfway down the bullpen. If Espo was going to stay back too, so be it. She'd go after this guy on her own if need be.

Lower East Side, Manhattan

Of course Esposito didn't stay behind, and Beckett wasn't surprised. He was a former Marine and she'd known him longer than Ryan. He'd always been her brother in arms. He could be an asshole who'd nag her for days about getting him cronuts, but when push came to shove, he'd walk into a burning building for her, no questions asked.

The building they walked into wasn't burning. It was a long-stay suite hotel of sorts, and after they flashed their badges, the desk clerk gave them access to Maddox's suite.

Her heart was pounding. There was no way he was escaping them now.

Armed and ready, they entered it and once they cleared the furnished room from any present danger, Beckett spotted a file folder lying on a table. Not just that, but a wedding album, clearly stolen from Captain Montgomery's house.

"Why?" Esposito questioned.

"They were looking for someone." And as she leafed through the album, she noticed a missing photo, and a sense of dread rose in her gut. "Maybe they found who they were looking for."

"Let's call for back-up…" There was no way around it now. They needed help tracking down not just Maddox, but the person that he was tracking, whose life was likely in danger.

And that's when she was thrown against the wall with a force that took her breath away.

Maddox.

He had to have snuck back into the suite after they entered.

He knocked the gun out of her hand and she struggled to catch her breath as he attacked Esposito next. Watched as he struck her partner, a formidable opponent in any street fight, and disabled him with shocking ease.

Maddox struck Esposito so hard and fast that he knocked her partner out before she could even take a step in his direction to help him out.

And then he bolted.

Fuck.

Beckett grabbed her gun and gave chase. Almost shot him just as he turned a corner and then took off into the stairwell.

To her surprise, he went up instead of down.

She ran after him, until they got to exit door for the roof and she saw him run across the top of the building. She took aim again, and once more he got away by turning a corner, behind the brick wall of the top of the stairwell.

At first glance he didn't seem to be armed and that made her hopeful that she had a chance, because she wasn't sure she stood one against him in a fist fight. You had to be a well-trained machine to knock out Javier Esposito in two quick blows.

With steady steps, she held on to her weapon with both hands and slowly moved around the brick structure.

And that's when he pounced, from out of nowhere, stealthy as a tiger on a hunt. He jumped her from the back and sent her to the ground, and her gun flying across the roof. But the drop to the ground gave her a split second to get away and she was able to get it back.

But once again, he kicked the gun out of her hand the second she got a hold of it.

It was going to come down to a fist fight, and in spite of getting in a couple of blows, she desperately wished Esposito would make his way up here. Because fighting Maddox was like fighting a brick wall. She used every trick she had and as much force as she could muster but he fended her off as though she were a pesky fly.

She ended up back on the ground a second time, with the wind knocked out of her.

And then, just for kicks, or because she'd started to piss him off, he'd yanked her back up by the collar and rammed a knee into her gut and then an elbow into her back.

That left her doubled over and gasping for breath.

Beckett forced herself back onto her knees to look at him. She desperately needed a few seconds to get some air back into her lungs or else she was done for.

"Just tell me who's behind this," she hissed.

"You're wasting your time, Detective," He paused for a moment, just as she'd hoped. "You've no idea what you're up against."

Now.

"Neither do you." With all the strength she had left, along with her entire body weight, she plowed herself into him.

But Maddox moved aside with lighting speed and used the force of her attack against her. Without Maddox to ram into, Beckett propelled right off the edge of the roof, and suddenly the only thing stopping her from falling more than a dozen storeys to the ground was the iron grip she had on the concrete ledge.

She was literally hanging from the roof of the building.

"Help!"

Maddox hovered above her, watching her struggle to hold on.

And then he turned around and left her to die.

They were done.

Beckett fought to get toehold on the wall of the building, anything that would give her something to push up against, but there was nothing. No cracks in the wall and a sheer drop below her.

Her fingers were cramping hard and there was no way she could hold for more than a minute. If that.

"Come on! No. Not like this!"

And then one of her hands slipped from the ledge and she couldn't regain her grip.

One hand. She was holding on to the roof with one hand.

"Beckett!" He was calling her. Castle's voice.

"Castle! I'm here!"

"Beckett, hang on!"

She was trying so hard but it was impossible. She was going to fall.

Going to die.

The hand that was still barely holding on to the ledge was slipping off.

And just as it did, a pair of hands gripped her wrist hard.

"Beckett!"

The hands pulled her up, slowly and carefully, until she was back on the roof and staring into her partner's face.

It wasn't Castle or Esposito, but Kevin Ryan.

He was the one who'd pulled her up, and behind him, as Kate was still catching her breath and trying to remain standing on shaky legs, a very visibly pissed off Captain Gates slowly came into her view.

Ryan had saved her life.

But he'd also gone to their boss and brought in back-up.

SoHo, NYC

"You look great, Dad." Alexis exclaimed. "Like, kinda cool and hip. Not, like, stuffy and formal and Dad-like."

Castle raised a single brow, not sure whether or not that was a compliment. "Thanks…I think."

"No, really. I love the black on black, and skipping the tie is a good idea too."

"Thanks," he repeated. Meaning it this time and turning around to look at his daughter, who was looking all sorts of gorgeous herself. It still did a number on him sometimes, when she dressed up to go out and suddenly reminded him that she wasn't a kid anymore. A teenager who was quickly blossoming into a stunning young woman in front of his eyes.

Part of him marvelled that he'd had a hand in creating something so lovely and exquisite, and another part was terrified because he knew damn well the kind of effect that she'd have on every straight young man in the room. It made him want to lock her in a panic room and throw away the keys until she was at least 28. Or maybe 35.

"You're beautiful," he told her. Because it needed to be said.

Her face lit up. "Thanks, Dad. I'm kinda hoping there'll be some cute guys at the party."

He felt his stomach churn. Why did she have to say things like that?

"I was kinda hoping you could keep an eye on your grandmother. You know how she gets at these things."

"You mean when she turns on her graydar and goes on the prowl for old, rich guys?"

"I heard that!"

Martha burst into the room and the sight of her made him grin. Larger than life as usual. Bold colours, a deeply plunging neckline, and a purple bauble on one of her delicate hands that was the size of a baby's fist.

Martha beamed at him and Alexis, unapologetically. "It's the absolute truth."

"Are you excited, Dad?" Alexis asked.

He took a last look into the mirror. Seeing himself flanked by two of the three women in his life made him even more starkly aware of the one who was missing. "Yes…I am."

He'd be lying if he said he didn't love launch parties. Granted, he enjoyed most parties, but celebrating the launch of a new novel was about so much more than having a good time. It was a culmination of months of work, the launch of a labour of love, and the nerve-wracking possibility of success or failure.

He used to have a reputation in publishing circles for hosting the wildest launch parties in the city, and this one tonight was A Very Big Deal. Tonight would end his longest stretch between launch parties – it had been nearly four years since he'd last published a novel.

Castle knew that all eyes would be on him this evening. This party would either be a giant comeback, or the beginning of the end.

So, yes, in spite of her absence, he was excited.

So much so that his entire body was thrumming with an electric, nervous energy.

"Is Katherine meeting us there?" Martha asked, and Castle saw that Alexis shook her head at her grandmother, silently gesturing not to go there. But of course his mother was oblivious to it.

"She might not make it," he told her.

"What?" Martha thought he was kidding. "Surely she has to be there and…"

Alexis, gently took her by the elbow, mid-sentence. "Apparently Kate's on some really important case. Come, I'll tell you about it."

Castle watched as his wise-beyond-her-years daughter deftly changed the topic before they both headed downstairs to the stretch limousine that Black Pawn had sent to pick them all up.

He'd join them in a second, but first he pulled out his phone from his pocket one last time.

He'd sent her a couple of texts a few hours ago and now it finally looked like she'd seen them. But there was still no response.

-Tonight is happening because of you.

-Please come.

He'd added a third text initially

-I love you.

But he'd deleted that one before sending it. Not because it wasn't true but because it felt too manipulative.

If you care about us, you'll drop the case.

If you love me, you'll show up tonight.

No, he thought. He'd learned his lesson yesterday. It had to be her choice. He couldn't force it. Even if it broke his heart.

Even if it got her killed.

And the truth was, deep down, he didn't really want it any other way. That bullheaded, relentless, stubborn streak made her exactly who she was and was a big part of why he loved her so much. He needed it to be her choice as much as she did.

He wouldn't want her any other way.

"Dad! Are you coming?" Alexis's voice boomed from the hallway. "The limo's waiting."

He took one last look in the mirror, satisfied with what looked back.

He did hope that she'd show up, because he really wanted her at his side tonight. Wanted the whole world to see her there, standing next to him.

But even more than that, he desperately hoped that she was okay.

"Coming!" he shot back.

Then he turned off the lights and made his way down to his waiting car.