This Night

Chapter 172

Author's Note: Nope, no baby name. I had a suggestion that the baby name shouldn't be revealed until Rick knows, and I think that's a good idea, Jewel doesn't. So, it's going to be coming up shortly. But not here. So I'm going to skip the whole Beth and Daryl drinking game, just couldn't figure out how to work it in with Axel. It still happened. Review please.

Axel, Daryl and Beth's POV:

Axel watched Daryl and Beth, knowing that Daryl just needed to get it out of his system. He was hurting like the rest of them.

"What do you want from me girl?" Daryl asked as he pulled out the arrows from the walker.

"I want you to stop acting like you don't give a crap about anything. Like nothing we went through matters, like none of the people we lost meant nothing to you. It's bullshit!"

"Is that what you think?" Daryl asked as he glanced at Axel. "You got something you want to add?"

Axel held up his hands. "I'm just standing over here keeping an eye out for walkers'. Beth seems to have this pretty well underhand."

"Thank you Axel," Beth said with a nod. "That's what I know, Daryl."

"You don't know nothing," Daryl told her.

"I know that when you look at me, you just see another dead girl. I'm not Michonne, Jewel, Carol, Summer, Maggie. I'm not Mar," Beth said as she looked at him.

"Beth, you may want to rethink this line of thinking," Axel suggested.

"No, let her go on," Daryl insisted. "I personally want to hear all she has to say."

"I survived, Axel survived. You don't get it cause we're not like them. But we made it and you don't get to treat us like crap because you're afraid," Beth insisted.

"I aint afraid of nothing," Daryl insisted.

Axel shook his head. "Now you're just lying to yourself, Daryl. We all got demons, things we are afraid of," he said.

"I thought you were stayin' out of this? Just keeping' watch on for walkers?" Daryl asked.

"I was staying out of it, when I didn't have anything to add. I had something to add right then, so I put in my thoughts," Axel answered with a shrug.

"He's right," Beth told him. "I remember when that little boy came out of the barn at the farm, right after my mom. You were like me. And now God forbid you let anyone get close to you again."

"To close huh? You know all bout that huh? You lost two boyfriends' and you can't even shed a tear," Daryl responded. "You're whole family is gone, all you can do is just go out looking for hooch like some dumb college bitch," he told her.

Axel moved himself out of the porch and pushed Daryl away. "Would you call Summer a bitch? Or Jewel? No they'd both punch you and kick you in the balls," he warned. "We can't be doing this, we can't be arguing among ourselves."

Beth looked at Daryl. "Screw you, you don't get it," she told him.

"Fine get it out of your systems," Axel said, as he stepped back to watch them.

"No you don't get it! Everyone we know is dead!" Daryl yelled at her.

"You don't know that!" Beth responded.

"Might as well be, cause you aint ever gonna see them again! Jewel, Summer, Merle, Mitch, Rick. Maggie, you aint ever gonna see her again," Daryl said.

"Daryl…" both Axel and Beth said.

"No! The Governor rode right up to our gates. Maybe if I hadn't stopped looking, maybe cause I gave up, that's on me," Daryl said as he started crying.

Beth wrapped her arms around his back while Axel placed a hand on his shoulder. "Daryl this isn't your fault, none of this," Axel told him.

"Your dad…maybe," Daryl said.

"Hershel wouldn't want you to blame yourself for this. You were out there saving lives," Axel told him.

"Lot of help that did," Daryl said sarcastically.

"A lot more of us would have been dead if you hadn't," Axel told him. "All of us have regrets, Daryl. But right now, the three of us, we need to work together, we need to make a plan. I don't believe that everyone is dead, because that isn't the group I know."

"He's right, we can't be it," Beth said.

"Right now I suggest we get inside, and a little more prepared for the night. The way you two were yelling, it's sure to bring some of these walkers' out," Axel said as he walked outside.

That night:

Axel sat on the porch, leaning against the door, as Daryl and Beth sat on either side of the porch steps. He looked at Beth. "You doin' alright? You had a lot to drink, being your first time and it being moonshine."

"I wish I could feel this way all the time," Beth answered.

Daryl gave a small chuckle. "That's bad," he said. "You didn't drink any," he told Axel.

"Nah, I gave up alcohol for narcotics, one addiction for the other," Axel said.

"I see why my daddy and Jewel gave up drinking," Beth said.

"Jewel gave it up for Summer. She was goin' to end up like our momma, passing out in bed with a lit cigarette, and killing herself. She saw that," Daryl said. "You're lucky that you're a happy drunk."

"Yeah, I'm lucky," Beth answered.

"I cried when I got drunk," Axel answered as both of them looked at him. "What? Alcohol made me weepy. Maybe that's why I liked narcotics better. So we got happy drunk, and weepy drunk, what kind of drunk are you Daryl?" Axel asked.

"I'm a dick when I'm drunk. Merle had this dealer. This janky little white guy, not much bigger then Axel, a tweaker. One day we were over at his house watching TV. Wasn't even noon yet and we were all wasted. Merle was high. We were watching this show and Merle was talking all this dumb stuff about it. And he wouldn't let up. Merle never could. Turns out it was the tweaker's kids' favorite show. And he never sees his kids, so he felt guilty about it or something. So he punches Merle in the nose, and I started hitting this tweaker like hard, hard as I can. Then he pulls a gun and put's it right here," Daryl said as he put his finger to his head. He says 'I'm going to kill you bitch," so Merle pulled his gun on him. Everyone is yelling, I'm yelling, I thought I was dead, over a cartoon with a talking dog."

"How'd you get out of it?" Beth asked.

"The tweaker punched me right in the gut and I threw up, they both started laughing and forgot about it," Daryl said.

"I bet Jewel wasn't to happy about it," Axel said.

Daryl shook his head. "The thing with Jewel was, even when we were younger, she knew when something was wrong. It's like she had this sixth sense, it tingled when I was doin' something wrong, and it screamed when Merle did something wrong," he said. "You want to know what I did before all this? I tried to keep the peace between Jewel and Merle, failed most of the time. I was drifting around with Merle, once Jewel and Summer got settled. Trying to keep him out of trouble. I did whatever he said we were doing that day. I was a nobody, a nothing. Some redneck asshole with a bigger redneck asshole as a brother. And, somehow those two redneck assholes had an angel for a little sister."

"You and Merle both changed," Axel pointed out. "It might have taken some time, and it certainly took a long time for things to be right between Merle and Jewel, after Woodbury, but they got there. You both miss your siblings, I had a brother. He wasn't much of anything either, and he had a money problem. He wouldn't give me any."

Beth and Daryl laughed. "I miss Maggie, the way she bossed me around. I miss Shawn, he was over protective and bossy. And my dad…I thought, well I hoped that he'd just lived the rest of his life in peace you know? I thought Maggie and Glenn would have a baby, like Rick and Jewel were doing. He'd get to be a grampa, and we'd all have summer picnics, birthday's and holidays, and he'd get really old. And it would happen, but it'd be quiet, it would be ok. He'd be surrounded by people he loved," she said as she laughed. "That's how unbelievable stupid I am."

Axel shook his head. "That's a dream we all have. I saw how after Lori died, we all bonded together to take care of Judy. I saw how all of us would do anything for Jewel when she got pregnant. Those two were on everybody's priority list, when this went down. That was a good dream, Beth, and it don't make you stupid."

Beth shrugged. "I wish I could change," she said.

Daryl looked at her. "You have."

"But not enough. Not like you, like you were made for how things are now," Beth told him.

"I have to agree with Beth there," Axel said.

"I'm used to it, things being ugly. Growing up in a place like this," Daryl said as he shrugged.

"But you got out of it," Beth told him.

"No, I didn't," Daryl answered.

"Yes you did," Beth said.

"Guess you're just gonna have to remind me of that sometimes," Daryl told her.

"No you can't depend on anyone for anything, right? I'll be gone some day, Axel too," Beth told him.

"Stop," Daryl told her.

"You're going to be the last man standing. You are. You are going to miss me so bad when I'm gone, Daryl Dixon," Beth told him.

"I think she's cut off," Axel told Daryl.

Daryl nodded. "You aint a happy drunk at all," he told her.

"Yeah I'm happy, not blind. You got to stay who you are now, not who you were. You got to put places like this behind you," Beth said.

"You know she's on the right track. She had to leave her farm, I had to leave the prison, things from our past. This, dwelling on something from your past, it just is going to hold you back," Axel told him.

"We should go inside, and burn it down," Beth said.

Daryl looked at the both of them. "We're going to need some more booze," he stated as they went inside and started to drench everything in the booze. He held up a lighter.

"You should do it," Axel said as Beth nodded. They both watched as he threw a lighter and set it on fire.

Beth held up her middle finger as the fire burnt, Axel doing the same. Beth hit Daryl's arm, to get him to do it. The three of them turned and started walking away, as Daryl gave a small smile.