Guest Requested: Raph's brothers comfort him after 'Slash and Destroy' and try to understand what he's going through.

Hope you enjoy xx

Slash and Destroy: The Aftermath

Raphael sat alone in front of the blank screened TV; his family were in bed after the evening they'd had. He closed his eyes, sick of staring at his own knees.

He needed to go to bed but he was afraid of the visions he would see.

He didn't want to see Spike-… no, Slash fall off the roof backwards again, he didn't want to see the fury in the bigger mutant's eyes. The pain he caused his little brothers.

How could he have been so childish? Why did he have to complain about his brothers to his pet, he loved them dearly and knew he would be worthless without them.

His family were his everything, even Leonardo.

His selfishness and immaturity had nearly lost him everything.

He felt sick with himself, even sicker as he felt tears sting his eyes.

He had no right to cry, he messed up.

But he missed Spike so damn much, his little pet was now gone forever.

His brothers were nearly killed by his pet, how messed up.

"Raphie?" Mikey's tired voice came from behind. Raph tensed and pointedly ignored it.

He couldn't deal with this right now; he didn't want his brothers to see him like this.

It seemed to have worked, he heard Michelangelo's footsteps walk away and back to the bedrooms.

He could feel himself shaking with the effort not to cry, he hated himself for it. He was meant to be the strong older brother, the protector, the hothead! Not some little girl crying over a lost pet. He buried his face into his hands as embarrassment burned him.

He was so glad Mikey left.

He tensed again when he heard three sets of footsteps come up behind him, he ignored his brothers.

He didn't want Mikey to laugh at him.

Donnie to tell him he can cure Spike.

He could never forgive his pet for what he did.

He especially didn't want Leonardo to lecture him.

"Donnie, Mikey… Why don't you two go back to bed?" Leo whispered gently.

"No way! What if he's hurt!" Donnie sounded so worried.

"He is hurt dude" Mikey sighed, "His little turtle's gone. Leo, he needs us!"

"Ok… why don't you two go grab a couple things then" Leonardo changed tactic; Raphael was actually grateful his eldest brother understood him so well.

He heard Leo whisper to the two youngest brothers before they ran off in different directions.

Leonardo gently sat beside Raph, he didn't say anything or look at him. He just placed a hand on his brother's shoulder. Showing he was there for him.

"You gonna lecture me?" Raphael asked after a minute.

"No" Leo shrugged, "Why would I?"

"Cause I'm a terrible brother and pet owner. I was irresponsible, childish, stupid-" Raph stopped when he felt Leo's hand grip him harder.

"I'm putting an end to that immediately" Leo scolded gently, "It hurts to hear you be so hard on yourself. You made a mistake Raph, that's all"

"A mistake which turned my pet into a bloodthirsty mutant who tried to kill our little brothers" Raph scratched at his face as he felt tears leak from his eyes.

"Hey" Leo now grabs his wrists and pulls them away, "Don't do that, there's nothing wrong with crying"

"There's everything wrong with it" Raph snapped as his tears continued to pour. "Big brothers aren't supposed to cry"

"Everyone cries Raph"

"Even you?"

Leo smiled at that.

"Oh yeah, all the time" He shrugged.

Raph stared at him in surprise.

"You lost a confidant today. Our brothers got hurt and I left you to deal with it all alone… it's ok to be upset" Leo soothed.

"At least you were doing something productive" Raph sighed, "I was getting my brothers killed and my own shell kicked"

"Raph. I had a tea party with a little girl just to get a canister of mutagen" Leo chuckled. Raphael half laughed, half sobbed. "You were protecting our brothers"

"I'm sorry I made him come after you guys" Raphael cried; Leo pulled his brother into a hug. "I'm sorry I couldn't kill him! What if he comes back? What if he gets one of you alone? I bad mouthed you the most Leo, he'll kill you without any thought!"

Leo just listened silently.

"I'm a terrible brother. I'm worse than the Shredder"

"No way" Leo frowned. "listen Raph, you really think you're the only one who bad mouths his brothers? We all do it, the only difference is that Spike became a twisted mutant. He didn't become a monster because of you, the mutagen does weird things to people… I'm sure Donnie can- "

"I don't want him back" Raph shook his head as he calmed down, "I mean I do but… I don't. It's hard to explain"

"I understand" Leo nodded as he released his brother, knowing he didn't actually like hugs very much. "It'll all be ok, I promise"

Raphael nodded silently.

"Thanks Leo" He smiled weakly.

"WE GOT THE STUFF!" Mikey yelled as he charged into the room.

"Shut up Mikey!" Donnie growled. "If Splinter wakes up, he'll kill us!"

Mike just shrugged sheepishly.

"What stuff?" Raph frowned, he watched his two youngest brothers as they hurried over.

"Blankets, pillows, my teddy" Mikey listed as he dropped them all on the ground.

"Tea" Donnie handed them each an empty mug and passed the flask around, "This is all I could carry with one good arm"

Raph felt a pang of guilt.

"But it'll keep him out the lab so there's worse injuries to have" Leo smirked.

"Yeah!" Mikey cheered, "We're gonna have so much fun D!"

Donnie cringed before sitting beside Raphael as Leo helped Mikey arrange the blankets and pillows.

"Hey" He smiled gently. "I'm sorry about Spike"

"It's ok" Raph sighed as he looked at his younger brother, "I'm sorry about what he did to you"

"That's not your fault" Donnie waved him off, "Mutagen affects the brain"

Raph just nodded.

"Can you protect me from Mikey though?" Donnie asked tiredly, "I don't know if I'll survive hanging with him until my arm's healed"

Raph doesn't know why but that struck something in him. He straightened up and grinned at Donnie.

"Of course," He nodded. "I'd never put a brother through something like that!"

They shared a laugh.

"Besides" Donnie yawned. "It feels like we haven't hung out in a long time, you usually hang with Leo and Mikey likes spending time in the lab."

Raph nodded.

"You're right… We'll fix that" He agreed, Donnie smiled.

"C'mon you two" Leo called. "Bedtime"

The four brothers lay down in the nest of blankets and pillows together, mindful of each other's injuries.

Mikey and Donnie fell asleep quickly due to their medication while Leo and Raph stared up at the ceiling.

"Don't worry about Slash coming back" Leo mumbled tiredly. "We'll be ready next time… you won't have to fight alone"

Raph nodded as Leo fell asleep.

He frowned in determination, if Slash ever came back to hurt his brothers Raph would kill him. He was no longer a beloved pet but a threat to his family, Raphael would not hesitate next time.

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