With apologies to all the shippers out there…no offence is intended.

As they approached the hobbit house with a yellow door, Tivan saw two people turn into the lane at the opposite end. One was a short Man who looked like a smith, a successful one as his clothes looked newly made and expensive. His coat was stained with long travel, his face concealed by a broad-brimmed hat. The other was a striking Northern woman in traditional dress, fur-trimmed cloak, braided hair, blue stripes on one side of her face and long sword across her back. The man looked up and saw them, his eyes widening in recognition. Tivan heard Freya gasp loudly, she ran to him and threw her arms around him, burying her face in his chest. The man hugged her tightly, his face resting against her hair, his eyes closed. As Tivan approached he could hear Freya sobbing, heaving sobs, like all the emotions she had held in check for so long were suddenly draining out of her.

"Shhhhhh…," the man was saying softly, rocking her slightly in his arms. His eyes flicked up to meet Tivan's, the bard was immediately struck by his hard eyes. Steel all the way through, he found himself thinking. Could it be…?

After what seemed like several minutes, Freya pushed herself back, wiping her face with her fingers. She slapped him on the chest.

"How could you do this to me?!" She exclaimed, her words coming out in gasps. "How could you?!"

"Now I get to say I told you so," the tall woman said. Tivan was startled to hear her speak perfect Khuzdul. She looked at Tivan. "And you are?"

"Tivan," he said at once, feeling as though her eyes were looking right into his soul, and too startled to ask her name in return.

The man gently set Freya back from him, his hands on her shoulders. He looked into her eyes. "It had to be done," he said. "I had already lived more than twice the normal span of a Dwarf's years. It was time to leave my old life behind."

"You could have told me! I would have kept your secret!" Freya's joy seemed to be turning to anger. "I can't believe you didn't trust me!"

"Would your grief have been real?" The woman asked. "Would you have stood on your own two feet and fought for what is yours, or would you have come begging?"

Freya glared at her and started to speak, but seemed to think better of it. Tivan was shocked that whoever this woman was she dared speak to his queen as though she was a common child. Before the conversation could continue the round door of the house behind them swung open and a Dwarf stepped out.

"It is just past tea time," he said, with a smile. "Why don't you all come inside and have a cup? I am already going to have quite a time trying to explain this to my neighbors. If you stay out here much longer, I am going to be labelled an official disturber of the peace."

Freya and Tivan stared. It was Nain, dressed like a Hobbit in tweed vest, short pants that ended at his knees, and nothing on his feet. Thorin and Kaylea looked at each other and laughed.

"Oh, do come in!" Nain said, switching to Khuzdul. He motioned them inside impatiently. "Let us all sit down and be comfortable. Then we can have a chat!"

As soon as the door was closed, Freya hugged her son tightly. "Thank Mahal you are alive!"

Nain leaned back, looking a bit perplexed. "Of course, I am alive. Why wouldn't I be?" He hugged her again. "It is so good to see you, mother." He stepped over and gave Tivan a slap on the back. "I never thought to see you here, old friend! Still driving the girls crazy?"

Tivan laughed and slapped him back. "Of course, but in the Iron Hills now!"

Thorin was eyeing the walls of the house skeptically. "What on earth are you doing here?"

Nain turned towards him, bowing low. "Grandfather, I am honored. I never did believe you were dead, by the way. Please do come in and sit down." He ushered them into the sitting room and went into the kitchen, they could hear the clatter of china. The parlor was cozy and well-kept, but crowded with stacks of books. The guests had to move them off the furniture to make places to sit, there were old maps spread out on the low table, which Kaylea immediately started going over.

Tivan stared at the man sitting across from him he had taken to be a blacksmith. Grandfather? The great Thorin Oakenshield, and his warrior wife? Not dead after all? It was hard to believe. Thorin had to be more than four hundred, and he looked barely older than Tivan himself. Not to mention he was half a foot taller than any Dwarf Tivan had ever seen. In the portraits he had seen Kaylea Wolf was a blue-eyed blonde, this woman had red hair and green eyes. If it was a disguise it was an extraordinary one, but he could see they wore matching braids.

Thorin sat back, still looking at the walls. "I hate these houses. Why do they make the walls curved? It is a huge waste of space."

Nain laughed. "Because hobbits live in holes," he said as he brought the tray out and began to pour the tea. "They are really quite comfortable when you get used to them." He went out then returned with another tray of cakes and sandwiches, offering them around. Then he picked up his own cup and sat back in his chair, looking around the room. "So, why are you all here?"

"You don't know?" Tivan asked, incredulous.

"Know what?"

"Your father has died," Freya said. "You are King of the Iron Hills."

Nain set his cup down. "That explains it." He looked out the window, his mind far away. "Is there no one else who wants the job?"

"The throne is your birthright," Thorin growled, sitting forward in his chair. "You are Borin's heir, the crown can only be passed to you. And right now the armies of Moria and Erebor are making ready to defend it. After all the trouble and effort to find you, are you seriously going to tell your mother you would rather stay here and pretend to be a Hobbit?"

"I am not pretending to be a Hobbit," Nain frowned at him, recoiling from his fierce stare. "I needed a quiet place to write my book and when I came here to do some research, I thought it was perfect."

"You are writing a book about Hobbits?" Kaylea asked, looking up from the maps.

"No, no! I am writing a history of the Dwarves," Nain replied, giving her a curious glance. "But you will no doubt recall there was a Hobbit who played a small part in reclaiming Erebor, and later made a rather large mark on history." He reached for a cake. "There was also some gossip about him and Thorin Oakenshield that needed looking into."

"What kind of gossip?" Thorin asked, his eyes narrowing and his voice murderous.

"Oh, Bilbo Baggins was a lifelong bachelor who everyone considered a bit eccentric," Nain said absently. "And you did give him that mithril mail. You know, people will talk."

"You have to be fucking kidding me!" Thorin jumped to his feet, his face dark with anger. "People thought Bilbo and I were…a couple?! " He looked at Kaylea. "Did you know about this?"

Kaylea shook her head, trying to keep a straight face. "Must be some kind of rumor running around the Shire."

"I cannot fucking believe it!" Thorin raged. "Useless Hobbits! A plague on the whole lot of them! I only took that idiot along because Gandalf insisted! I gave him that mail coat so he wouldn't get himself killed, because the wizard would have skinned me alive if any harm had come to him. Not because I was in love with him! I have never heard anything more fucking ridiculous!"

Kaylea kept her face impassive, waiting for Thorin's rage to play itself out. She found it rather humorous, and having been the subject of similar gossip many times in her past she had long ago learned to shrug it off. Everyone else was trying to blend into the furniture in stunned silence. Thorin's rage was legendary, and when he was in a mood you did not want to be anywhere near him.

Thorin paced around the room, he slapped the doorframe with his hand causing everyone to duck as it came loose, angling into the entry hall. He turned to glare at Kaylea. "I am going to burn this whole place to the ground."

"Calm down, husband. Hobbits love a bit of gossip, you know that," Kaylea said calmly. "If Bilbo had male partners it would be an easy leap to include the Dwarf who gave him a priceless jeweled coat." She switched to Standard. "You are certainly aware in the Empire you have admirers among all the genders, it is not a reflection on your own orientation. An Exotic would say you are old-fashioned."

Thorin shook his head, then smiled crookedly. Kaylea had always been adept at diffusing his tempers. "Point taken," he replied in the same language. "Though in this case, I will proudly wear the title of old-fashioned." He took his seat again and leaned over to touch his forehead to hers. "I am only interested in women, one particular woman, in fact."

"You had better be," Kaylea smiled at him, tugging on one of his braids. "If I catch you looking at another woman, I will cut your hair off."

"Pardon me," Nain asked. "What language are you speaking? I have never heard the like. What is the root of it?" He had a notebook open in his lap and was furiously scribbling away.

"It is the language of my people, the Dorsai," Kaylea told him. "It is not spoken in Middle Earth."

Nain looked at her blankly for a moment, before sitting back in his chair. "Of course, you are Kaylea Wolf! I'm sorry, with the disguise I thought you were…someone else."

Thorin scowled at him. "Are you suggesting I would marry another woman?"

Before Nain could answer Freya jumped in, not wanting her father to get started again. "Can we please return to the subject at hand?" She asked. "I am sure Nain will set the record straight about this other business in his book."

"Yes, yes, of course," Nain said quickly, trying to regain his composure. He eyed his doorframe nervously; a little trickle of dirt was accumulating on his floor. Thorin had knocked the whole thing loose with a swipe of his hand. How was that even possible? "As I suspected, there was absolutely nothing to the rumors. A sentence or two should suffice." He looked from Freya to Thorin. "What is this about armies?"

Kaylea studied his face, she caught something in his tone when he mentioned there was nothing to the rumors. Disappointment? Thorin quickly sketched out what they had learned on their travels, and Freya added the plans of her councilors in the Iron Hills.

"The armies of the Iron Hills lack only their king to rally round," Freya told him. "You must return with us right away."

Nain was looking down at his notebook, turning his pencil in his fingers. "What's the matter, my friend?" Tivan asked. "You always told me of your plans for the kingdom, you have done the things you told me you wanted to do before becoming a king. Why do you hesitate now?"

Nain looked around at his guests, but before he could reply they heard the front door open.

"Honey, I'm home!" Came a voice from the hall, followed by a Dwarf carrying a box full of vegetables. He looked up at the askew doorframe, then at everyone in the sitting room. "What on earth?"

"Cray? Is that you?" Tivan asked in astonishment.

Thorin put a hand to his forehead, Kaylea leaned to whisper in his ear. "Shall we step outside before you bring the ceiling down on us this time?"

Freya looked at her son's childhood friend, then at her son, then around the room at Tivan, her father and his wife, then started to laugh. A true, infectious sort of laugh, the kind that once started is very hard to stop. Tivan was the next to take it up, then Nain and Kaylea and finally Thorin, who sat back leaning against his wife. Freya was laughing so hard she laid a hand on Tivan's knee to steady herself. He took it in his and pulled her close to laugh with her. Cray meanwhile had put down his box and pulled up a chair next to Nain, looking a bit bewildered.

"Well, this certainly explains a lot of things," Freya said, wiping her eyes. Cray had been her son's closest friend ever since his teen years. He was the son of Trond, her chief counselor, and the two boys had been inseparable. She remembered Cray left the Iron Hills some years after Nain had disappeared.

"You see now why I hesitate to return to the Iron Hills," Nain said, shifting in his seat. "My people would not accept me, and I don't want to live a lie."

"What you want has very little to do with it," Thorin told him. "You can carry on however you want in private, but one of the responsibilities of a king is to produce heirs to insure the continuation of his line. I do not need to tell you that."

"I am not as strong as you," Nain replied, he met Thorin's gaze, his face anguished. "I cannot make the choices that you did. I tried to leave Cray behind, but all I discovered was I cannot live without him."

"My children brought me boundless joy," Thorin said. "And I would not have them if Kaylea had married me the first time I proposed. I resented her for a long time for making me marry a woman I didn't love, but in the end it was the right choice."

"So, that story is true! That Kaylea did not accept you at once," Nain exclaimed, suddenly the historian again. He scribbled a note in his book.

Thorin chuckled. "I lost track of how many times I proposed to her before she accepted me. Ten years after the death of Shurri, when she finally ran out of excuses." He glanced sideways at his wife, who was shaking her head.

"If you will excuse me," Cray said. "I think some introductions are in order. And I have had a long day and was really looking forward to some supper. I propose you all stay and join us."

Everyone thought this was an excellent plan. Nain introduced everyone to his partner, then explained dinner would have little meat, as it was a day before his regular shopping day.

"We can take care of that," Kaylea told him. "How about some fresh coneys?"

"That would be perfect!" Nain exclaimed. "But where will you get them?"

"Never mind that," she replied. "It will just take a few minutes." Skadi and Aeneas had been catching them with ease all day, now that it was growing dark they could easily slip into Hobbiton. She and Thorin stepped outside to wait for them.

"So, your grandson is living with a man and your daughter has taken up with a bard half her age," Kaylea said as she took Thorin's hand, intertwining her fingers with his. "Will the House of Durin survive?"

Thorin chuckled. "It has survived worse," he said, taking out his pipe. "Nain is hardly the first Dwarf to love another of the same sex, and Freya…," he shrugged. "If she is happy, then I am happy."

"And here I thought you were old-fashioned."

Thorin pulled her close to kiss her neck. "I am old-fashioned, my love. And politically this is a mess." They sat together on the bench outside the door, watching the stars come out. Thorin smoked his pipe thoughtfully, Kaylea leaned against him, her head on his shoulder. It was about twenty minutes before the wolves came trotting up the lane, each carrying two braces of rabbits. They leaped lightly over the fence just as Nain opened the door.

"How much longer…oh, my!" Nain blinked in surprise at the two huge wolves. "The famous wolves of Dorsai! Will they be needing dinner, too?"

Kaylea laughed as she took hold of the rabbits. "No, they found plenty of game today. Here, I'll dress these for you."

Back inside, Kaylea helped Nain in the kitchen, while the wolves stretched out in the hall. Out of the corner of her eye she watched Thorin and Freya, sitting on the couch together talking quietly. Freya held her father's hand in hers, her face the picture of adoration, while Thorin beamed at her with all a father's pride, like she was a girl of six sitting on his knee. Nothing ever changed between those two. His endless favoring of his only daughter had caused not a little family friction between her and her brother Durin. It surprised Kaylea that Thorin had agreed not to tell Freya when they sailed north. She had expected it to be a fight, but Thorin saw the danger. If his daughter knew he was alive, she would be visiting every year. Tivan was sitting in a chair, listening intently and trying not to look nervous. Thorin intimidated everyone, but it had to be worse when he was the supposed-to-be-dead legendary father of the woman you really shouldn't be sleeping with.

Dinner was a merry affair. There was far too much food, thanks to the wolves, and the conversation sparkling. Freya told the story of her journey with Tivan, and Thorin gave an account of the search he and Kaylea had been on. Inbetween there was quite a bit of catching up; Tivan was friend to both Nain and Cray, and Freya wanted to hear every detail of what her father had been doing. After dinner while Tivan and Cray washed up, the others discussed the next move.

"You must return to the Iron Hills, at least until this crisis is passed," Thorin told Nain.

Nain shook his head. "I agree the armies need a leader, but I do not think it has to be me." He looked around the table. "I left the Iron Hills years ago, and not many noticed my passing. For years after that I traveled the country, visiting all the Dwarf kingdoms. When I mentioned the Iron Hills there was a name on everyone's lips, and it was not the King's." He looked pointedly at his mother.

Freya blinked at him. "Me? Everyone talks about me?"

Nain laughed. "The daughter of the great Thorin Oakenshield, renowned for her beauty and kindness, of course they do! The army would only support me if you are standing by my side. Why not just lead them yourself?"

"Do you think the Dwarves of the Iron Hills are ready for a woman on the throne?" Kaylea asked, giving Nain a skeptical glance. "The ones from the Blue Mountains certainly weren't."

"We are not in the Second Age anymore," Nain replied. "They will certainly accept my mother after they find out about my personal life." He put a hand up to stop Thorin from interrupting. "I already told you, I am not going to hide who I am. I have done that far too long already. My father's line can continue through my sister. Have you arranged a marriage for Enya yet?"

Freya rolled her eyes. "What is it with you men trying to marry my daughter off?" She crossed her arms. "Why can't she just marry someone she loves?"

"That is not how it works, mother," Nain said reproachfully. "You know that."

"My father let me marry who I wanted," she looked at Thorin, who was studying the bottom of his glass. "Didn't you?"

He shrugged. "It was a good match." His eyes flicked to Tivan.

"I can't believe it!" Freya was indignant. "All this time I have been defending you for letting me marry for love, and it was really politics after all!"

"When you are royalty everything is politics, your majesty," Kaylea said quietly. Her gaze moved to Tivan, then back to Freya. "No doubt you have considered your choices carefully."

Freya reached for Tivan's hand as he returned to his seat at the table. "Admitting to myself that I loved Tivan was not easy. I agonized over it for a long time," she smiled at him. "And I won't give it up." Tivan leaned over and kissed her, then Freya turned to look at her father, daring him to refute her. Thorin had spent his years as King very publicly carrying on with his warrior mistress, he didn't have the right to tell his daughter she couldn't do the same. "Why not win the hearts of the Dwarves from the Blue Mountains by offering them a home in the Iron Hills?"

Thorin nodded. "Then Enya could fall in love with one of their nobles on her own." Freya frowned at him, but before she could respond Thorin went on. "This discussion needs to be put aside for another time. As we speak, armies are marching toward the Iron Hills. This Vidar intends to turn your own people against you, if you are not there to defend yourselves it only makes his job easier."

"My people will not be taken in by his lies," Freya said flatly.

"It might surprise you how easy it is to influence a man's mind, all that is needed is the right lever," Kaylea leaned forward on her elbows, looking around the table. "Dwarves have never been a numerous people, and their kingdoms are almost unimaginably wealthy. Now they see Men everywhere, multiplying across the land, even living amongst you. How long will it be before they come for the treasure of the Dwarves? The might of Men is great, the Dwarves might only stand against them if they are united, under one king."

"There is much of this kind of talk in the Ered Mithrin," Tivan said glumly.

"And Vidar will have sent his servants before him," Kaylea said. "You can be assured this is already being whispered around the hearths in the Iron Hills. Not everyone will listen, but can you be sure it will not be enough to turn the tide? Vidar has already forged the two kingdoms of the Ered Luin into one, and added the Ered Mithrin for good measure. He should not be underestimated."

The Dwarves shifted in their seats, the room was quiet for a moment, one of the wolves was licking its paws in the hall. "How do we defeat him?" Cray shook his head. "How do you fight against an enemy that is already inside the minds of the people?"

Freya straightened up in her chair, her eyes far away. "We show him the Queen of the Iron Hills has no need of his false promises. She has allies stronger than any he can claim."

Thorin looked at her searchingly. "Of whom do you speak, daughter?"

Freya repeated Lord Elrohir's promise, that the Elves would answer her call. While Elves and Dwarves had their differences over the years, if the Elves joined the army of the Iron Hills on the field Vidar's carefully built alliances would surely fracture. The fighting prowess of Elves was legend, and among Men they were revered almost as gods. Men would never take up arms against them, or any they protected. Suddenly it would be Freya that could protect the Dwarves from the avarice of Men.

Thorin and Kaylea smiled at each other. Elrohir certainly knew they were searching for Nain, his promise to Freya was also a message for them. "In the morning you must summon the ravens," Kaylea told the Queen. "Send word to Rivendell and discover if there is any news from your home. Hopefully you will have time to return before the fighting starts."

There was a long silence then Cray got to his feet. "Enough of this serious talk!" he exclaimed. "This is a reunion of family and friends and we have a famous bard in the house tonight. Let's have some music!"

Tivan got out his violin and Thorin his golden harp. Nain disappeared into the back of the house and returned with a flute and a drum for Cray while Freya took a seat at the piano. The next hours were spent with music and singing, letting their cares and worries fade away. When Tivan sang everyone fell silent to listen, his silky voice transporting them to firelit stone halls and moonlit forests. The wolves came into the room and sat listening politely, occasionally contributing a low howl. For a brief moment all the years of separation between them vanished, they were a happy family enjoying one another's company.

Nain insisted everyone stay the night. His house went far back into the hill. It had been built to impress, as the Sackville-Baggins were one of Hobbiton's most prestigious families. None of the rooms had a bed long enough for Kaylea, but she and Thorin made a comfortable nest of the bedclothes on the floor.

Some hours later, Thorin curled against his wife's back, pulling her against him. Kaylea leaned back, feeling the cool of sweat drying on her skin, basking in the glow that came after their lovemaking. Thorin moved her hair aside to kiss her neck.

"Now that the cat is out of the bag, can I have my wife back?" He asked, his fingers caressing her stomach.

Kaylea chuckled. "Have you been sleeping with some other woman I don't know about?"

Thorin tightened his grip around her and bit her ear. "I miss your golden hair, your real eyes. I never have liked redheads." Kaylea reached back and slapped him on the side. He snuggled her closer. "The field surgery unit can do it," he whispered.

"Yes. The eyes are easy, the hair will take longer," Kaylea sighed. "I suppose there is no harm in it. No one knows us out here, except your kin." She pushed herself up to look at him. "I don't know why it is I can never say no to you."

Thorin smiled widely at her. "Because you love me?" He pulled her down to kiss her.

Kaylea rested her chin on his chest, grinning back at him. "No. I only keep you around because you are such an amazing lover."

Thorin's eyebrows shot up in mock surprise. "You mean we are both doing that? I thought it was just me!" He pulled her up to kiss her again. "I love you, and I want to see my queen's real face again."

"I love you, husband," Kaylea said, as she reached for her saddlebags. "And honestly, I can't wait to get rid of this hair."

"