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Chapter 22

~X~

"The greatest warriors are the product of their defeats as much as their victories."

Mand'alor Fenn Shysa~

Back on the Razor Crest, Ravana watched from the back seat in the cockpit as they lifted off from Leban, leaving the lush, green planet behind. She felt a mixture of emotions as they left the atmosphere and entered the darkness of space. Wrapping her arms a little tighter around the child on her lap, she couldn't help but smile, knowing that she wouldn't have to say farewell to him after all. At least not right away. Sure, Din had said he would attempt to locate these Jedi, but even that was a long shot, one Ravana wasn't sure she ever wanted to happen.

Why couldn't they just keep him? Din had done a fine job of protecting him so far, not to mention getting her out of a scrape or two. No one would fault them for continuing to watch over him, would they?

Or was that simply her wish, and not the Mandalorian's at all? Bounty hunting was his livelihood, and perhaps he wished to return to it? Not something one normally did with a woman, a kid, and a zaktan tagging along, she imagined.

"So…where exactly are we going?" Ravana questioned. He'd mentioned the Armorer before, but only in passing.

"When we were on Navarro, Greef said he and Cara had helped the Armorer get safely off-planet," Din informed her, not turning his gaze from the controls before him. "I need to find her and ask a few questions."

"Oh? And who is this Armorer exactly, and why can only she answer them?" Ravana tried her best to keep any signs of jealousy from seeping into her words, but she wasn't sure she succeeded. It was foolish to feel this way, after all, Din was her husband in name only. She truthfully had no claim on him.

"She is one of the leaders of our clan," he explained, thankfully sounding as if he hadn't noticed anything in her tone. "When the covert revealed themselves during my escape from Navarro with the kid, many were hunted down and killed because of it. She left a clue as to where she was going, and I need to find out how many of my brethren survived. She also has knowledge I need…answers to questions I now have."

"Oh…I see," Ravana felt a little better about that. A leader was not exactly someone Din might have had romantic feelings for in the past…right? "What clue did she leave?"

Here Din reached into a pocket and pulled out a small piece of cloth, handing it back for her to inspect. Unfolding it, Ravana found a beautifully crafted pendant in the shape of an intricately coiled snake, the likes of which she'd never seen before.

"It's a lovely piece…but what is it? What does it mean?" she asked.

"It's a taloo, a serpent found only on the planet Anoah, located on the fringes of the Mandalor system. It's one of the few places still sympathetic to the plight of the Mandalorians after the Purge by the empire." Din revealed. "That's where I'll find her, and hopefully any others of my enclave who survived."

"And if you don't find them there?" she tried to sound as sympathetic as possible, yet with the luck they'd been having so far, it was a distinct possibility.

"Then I'm no worse off than I was before," he said with a heavy sigh.

"I hope they're there," she offered, hating to hear him sound so downhearted.

"As do I," was all he would say.

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Ravana sat there in silence for a bit, until she noticed that the kid had fallen asleep in her arms. Smiling down at him she hadn't realized until now just how much she would have missed him had he stayed on Leban. He was the epitome of adorableness, and she couldn't help but feel a close bond with the little fellow. He wasn't her child, but he was as close as she had ever come to actually having one. Zax was great, but he was a pet, not a child. Granted, the kid was not of her species, but in her heart that didn't matter a bit. She loved him, and no one could ever take that away from her. Ravana could only hope that no one would ever try to take him away either.

"Is he asleep?" came Din's voice, breaking her from her maternal thoughts. "Here, let me take him," he offered, standing up and holding out his hands. "You mind the ship."

Ravana was about to protest, saying that she could put him down for his nap, but something in Din's tone stopped her. So, handing him over, she slipped into the pilot's seat and tried to remember everything she'd been taught about the control panel. She heard Din make his way down the ladder, and then a few happy yips from Zax, but after that there was silence.

It only took a few minutes before a light began to flash on the console, one Ravana wasn't sure what it meant. Was it a warning light? Were they running low on fuel? With a sigh of frustration, she turned and headed down to the hold, eager to get Din back up there to figure out what had gone wrong. When she got to the bottom of the ladder, she could hear the Mandalorian's voice, quietly speaking to the kid within his little cubical. She quickly ducked out of the way, so as not to interrupt, but she couldn't help but overhear what was being said.

"There you go…all snuggled in," Din said softly. "I'll have to fix up a larger spot for you if you plan on doing any growing. Not that you'll ever get too big if your people are anything to judge by. Still, you'll need room to move around." He was quiet for a moment, then he spoke again. "I'm…I'm glad you're still with us. I wasn't happy about the possibility of leaving you behind like that. I mean, I would have, if it had been safe and your parents were still alive. I'm sorry about that…your parents, I mean. I know what it's like to lose your family. But you have us. Me and Ravana…and the mutt here." Ravana assumed that Zax was once more snuggled up at the kid's side. "So, don't go worrying about anything. We'll keep you safe. I promise."

By now Ravana could feel tears running down her cheeks at Din's sweet words. Once again, he'd surprised her by letting his caring side show, as well as speaking such things out loud to the kid. For a man of few words, he sure managed to find the right ones when they were needed. He might be all beskar on the outside, but beneath that armor beat a heart of gold.

However, Ravana also knew the stoic Mandalorian would not be happy to know she'd overheard him, so she quickly made her way back up the ladder, waiting another minute before she called down to him.

"Din…there's a light flashing up here, and I don't know what it means," she said, attempting to speak over the lump that had formed in her throat. Ravana knew he would miss the kid as much, if not more, than she would…but it was nice that he'd said the words out loud, even if she had to pretend she hadn't heard them. It only made her care for him all the more.

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The light turned out to be nothing of consequence, and easily fixed by a flip of a switch, much to Ravana's relief. And though he'd given her a rather lengthy stare, he'd thankfully said nothing about the redness of her eyes or the fact that she was a bit hoarse.

Due to the fact that they would need to utilize a roundabout way to Anoah, their trip would take several days. It would also necessitate stopping at several ports to refuel. And that would require credits.

"We could stop here, or here," Din said, pointing at a few dots on the screen, indicating planets that might have work for him. "I should be able to find a job or two."

"Or…you could just take these and not have to work at all," Ravana insisted, reaching into her pocket and taking out the bag of credits he'd given her before they'd found out about the bounty on her head.

"No! Those are yours," he insisted, not even looking in her direction.

"Yes, mine to do with as I choose," she agreed. "And I choose to give them to you to support this quest in finding your people and these Jedi."

"That's my responsibility, not yours," he huffed, sounding almost offended.

"Oh, my stars! Don't tell me your manly pride is all bent out of shape just because I want to help!" Ravana gasped in mock horror, her tone ripe with sarcasm and annoyance. "Mandalorians aren't the type who think males rule the roost and women are subservient, do they? Egad! What kind of man have I married?"

"No, that's not what we believe," he growled, apparently not taking her kidding very well. "Some of our most feared warriors are women and they are highly respected. In fact, the Armorer could easily overpower most in the covert without breaking a sweat."

"Well, that's good to hear," she stated. "Then why won't you take the credits? It would save us time and trouble, as well as get us to our destination faster."

Din was silent for a few moments, something Ravana had become used to, knowing that he was mulling over how to answer in his mind before speaking. At last he found the words.

"You need to have your own money," he explained. "I don't want you feeling beholding to anyone. You should have the means to choose your own path."

"So, you want me to take the money…and what, leave?" she asked, her heart suddenly feeling as if there were a vice around it.

"WHAT? NO!" This time Din did swivel around in his chair to face her. "That's not what I meant!"

"Then what do you mean?" Ravana all but begged to know.

Once more he paused, taking a deep breath, and letting it out slowly. He quickly gathered his thoughts so as not to make more of a mess of things.

"I've seen a lot of women remain in a bad situation simply because they have no means to choose otherwise," he told her, sounding rather uneasy about this conversation. "I simply don't want you to feel like you have to stick with me out of necessity…that's all."

"You think I'm only here because I have nowhere else to go?" she questioned, before cringing slightly. "Well…maybe it's true that I don't have anywhere particular to go, but that would hardly keep me here if I didn't want to be." Ravana reached out and took hold of Din's hand, placing the bag of credits in his palm. "I like being here on the Razor Crest. I'm happy to help however I can in finding a way to keep the String-bean safe. Take the money, Din, please."

Once again he was silent, his expressionless visor staring at her while he thought this over. Oh, if only she could see his face, to look into his eyes and attempt to understand what was going on in that complicated mind of his. But no, Ravana was left waiting and wondering about his next words, whatever they might be.

"Are you sure?" he asked, holding up the bag she had given him.

"Din…I wouldn't have offered if I wasn't sure," she sighed.

"And you don't want to leave?" he pressed.

"No," she insisted. "I'm happy to be here with the kid…and you." Ravana knew she'd stumbled over that last word, but it was the truth. Granted, she'd never really spent much time around anyone but her uncle, for even if she did have a few friends in the nearby village on Pessue, she knew less about their lives than she did this one Mandalorian. Din had also done more for her than anyone ever had, aside from her parents and her uncle. And looking down at the band on her wrist, she could honestly say she'd never been attached to anyone like she was to him. She gave a little laugh and an amused shake of her head. "Besides…we are married, you know. Where else should a wife be, but at her husband's side?"

"About that –" he began, but she cut him off.

"I know, we can deal with it later," she said far too quickly. "I'm fine with that, really." She then stood up and made to leave. "I'm going to turn in. Wake me if you need me to take over or something. Goodnight." Ravana was out the door and down the ladder before he could say another word, desperate to avoid any talk about their ill-fated wedding. Not because she was upset or ashamed by it…but instead she found she didn't want him to insist on ending it.

Heading into her small room, Ravana shut the door and sat down on her bed, leaning forward and burying her head in her hands. How did it come to this? When had her feelings for Din…her husband…grown so deep? He hadn't exactly given her any reason to assume they might be returned. But then again, he hadn't given her any reason to suspect they couldn't be either.

"Oh, what am I going to do?" she moaned, laying back on her cot and staring up at the metal ceiling as if it could possibly help. Sadly, it had even less answers than she did.

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Din had sat in the cockpit for a long time after Ravana left. The bag of credits weighing heavy in his hand. The money had been for her. To start a new life…and yet she'd made him take it back. Was her action symbolic somehow? Did her giving him the credits mean that she wanted this to be her new life? Din couldn't say he was opposed to the idea, in fact, he didn't mind it at all.

Oh, who was he kidding, he loved the idea!

"Now who's being an idiot?" he muttered to himself. Ravana didn't want him. Nor did she want this life. She only wanted to help the kid. That was why she'd given him the credits, and even if he would have rather she kept them, he knew it would assist them in getting to Anoah much faster. Hopefully he would find what he was looking for, as well as answers to questions that were burning a hole in his mind. Then, once that puzzle was solved, he would set his thoughts – and heart – to the matter of Ravana.

So, with that determination, he put the ship on autopilot and headed off to his chambers to get some much-needed sleep.

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"Are you sure you want to do this?" Ravana asked the following day, eyeing the man in front of her skeptically. "I mean…is it absolutely necessary? My uncle already taught me how to hunt and use a blaster."

"Which is all good and well, but knowledge of self-defense is vital if you wish to survive out here in the galaxy," he stated, stepping towards her as he reached out, positioning her stance and arms. He then looked over at the kid, who was happily flipping switches in the little activity box Din had brought down from the cockpit. "Now, remember…this is only for fun." He told the child sternly. "No one is getting hurt. So, don't do anything." The only answer he got was a few gurgles and coos, as well as a happy yip from Zax. Figuring that was as close to a yes as he was going to get, the Mandalorian turned his attention back to Ravana. "It's important you know how to defend yourself; it could mean the difference between life and death."

"But, isn't that why I have you, my bodyguard?" she smiled, batting her eyes at him playfully. She could practically hear him rolling his eyes at her teasing, watching him move to stand in front of her. It had been his idea to teach her some of the basics on their way to Anoah, and while Ravana was fine with the idea, she was a little nervous about being in such close proximity to him as he trained her. There would be touching, of that she was sure.

"I won't always be there to protect you, Ravana," he stated. "You need to be safe even when I'm not around."

This idea made her sad. Why wouldn't he always be there? Unless he was doing this in order to feel better about leaving her on a planet one day…perhaps one day soon.

"Fine," she huffed, now rather eager to vent her grief and frustration on something…even if it was him. "What do I do first?"

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Their lessons progressed for quite a while, leaving Ravana sore and sweaty, yet it would seem no nearer to being able to protect herself than she was to start with. Every move she made was wrong, every block she tried was easily outmaneuvered, and each time she thought she had done well…Din would tell her differently.

"Again!" he barked out, gesturing for her to come at him. "And this time, try and stay on your feet."

Ravana was just about at the end of her rope, and his irritating orders were grinding on her last nerve. So, with more speed and power than she thought she possessed, she lunged at him, taking him by surprise as she tackled him at his waist with all her might. This time, to her delight, he went down, his helmet striking the floor as she landed on top of him.

From the sidelines, the kid squealed and Zax yipped at her unexpected maneuver, the training session apparently highly entertaining to them both.

Ravana was probably more stunned by her victory than her downed opponent, but only by a little. The two of them lay there, her body plastered to his as they heaved labored breaths. She'd not been able to best him as yet, so she had no idea what she was supposed to do next.

"That…that was very good," came his rather shocked voice from beneath the helmet at last, breaking them out of the trance they appeared to be in.

"It was?" she gasped. "You mean I actually did something right for a change?" In a flash she was up on her feet, her hands raised in the air as she gave a hoot of joy. "I, Ravana the Great, have beat the Mandalorian! I win at last!" She began to dance around his prone body, something that had the kid squealing with laughter. That is, until she felt a hand grip her ankle and down she went, landing on her back right next to Din. "OUCH!" she cried, cringing as she rubbed the spot on her hip where she knew a bruise would surely be the following day.

"Never celebrate a win until you know your victim is completely immobilized," he told her in a stern voice. "Over confidence can kill you faster than inexperience."

"Hey! What happened to 'that was very good'?" she whined, rolling over to face him as they lay there on the floor. "You're a mean instructor, you know that?"

"If being mean is what it takes to train you correctly, then so be it," he stated.

"Still, it wouldn't kill you to be a little nicer," she grumbled, moving to rise once more, but he stopped her by capturing her wrist in his hand, pulling her attention back to him.

"I only want you to be safe, Ana," he explained, yet the tone of his voice said a great deal more than his words alone. That, and the fact that he'd just called her Ana…a nickname no one had ever used before. Rav, yes…but never Ana. She found she liked it a great deal.

"Thank you…Din," she whispered back, unable to take her gaze off his visor. She found herself wondering what color his eyes might be, and if they were staring at her the same way she was now looking at him. "I appreciate that. Really, I do."

"Yes…well," he stammered, clearing his throat as he practically leapt to his feet. "I think that's enough for today. Keep practicing the basics you learned, and we'll have more lessons when possible."

"Yes, Din," she agreed, gazing up at him with a small grin.

"Watch the kid, and keep an eye on the com-panel," he told her. "I'm going to use the refresher."

"Yes, Din," Ravana repeated, not moving a muscle.

"Good," Din muttered, turning and heading for the small room without a backwards glance. Shutting the door, he once again slid the lock in place with a loud thunk.

"Well…that was interesting," she whispered, a wide smile spreading over her face.

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Inside the refresher, Din quickly removed his helmet and splashed cold water over his face, scrubbing at it vigorously before leaning back against the wall with a sigh.

What was wrong with him?

Never had a woman affected him so greatly, turning his mind to mush and his body against him. When she'd been sprawled out on top of him like that, he'd lost all sense, not being able to move or speak. She'd taken him quite by surprise but as they lay there, their limbs tangled together, Din couldn't help but wish it had been for a completely different reason.

Oh, how he wanted her!

Raking his fingers through his hair, he shut his eyes, attempting to drive visions of her from his mind. It was getting more and more difficult to keep his thoughts about her chaste, for every other moment it seemed that all he wanted to take her in his arms and…and what?

Kiss her?

As if that was even possible without removing his helmet, which of course he couldn't do without breaking his oath. If only he could know what her thoughts were on the matter, yet he couldn't seem to find the words, or the nerve, to ask. Some hardened bounty hunter he turned out to be. Brought to his knees by the vibrant emerald eyes of a woman.

It wasn't like he could hide in here forever, and the Razor Crest was not the most spacious ship around – he was going to run into her, a lot. Thankfully they would be landing on Anoah the following day, allowing him a bit of a breather. If he was able to locate the Armorer, perhaps she might be able to help him. Or at least offer some suggestions on how to deal with this rather embarrassing situation.

Yet, for now, Din stripped off his beskar and clothes, stepping into the refresher and setting the temperature to ice-cold. He could only hope this would help for now.

Well, it looks like Din is having some trouble dealing with is feelings for Ravana...and she's not doing much better either. Oh, if only they would just talk things through. (sigh)

Did you enjoy the training session? Din's confession to the kid? Ravana's short-lived victory dance?

Let's just hope some of the training Din gave her will come in handy if they ever run into more trouble. Oh, who am I kidding...it's not a case of IF...but WHEN! ha ha.

Thanks again for all your kind reviews.

Guest Reviews:

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Lizzzz: You know, I have NO idea what the Mandalorian rules are for taking off a helmet. If it can be done, when it can be done, and with whom it can be done. Sooooo, I'm making up the rules as I go along. ha ha. I do hope you like what I came up with...and good eye there, you're not the only one who picked up on that little tid bit. I guess we'll just wait and see. Thanks for reading and for your insightful review. T.O.W.G.

DinJarrenslover: I'm glad you are enjoying the story. I'm having a lot of fun writing it as well. Hope you liked this chapter as well! T.O.W.G.