The moment Peter walked out of the lab, he got a notification on his phone from Alphys.

**OMG just realized i forgot to watch the Undyne/Human battle lol**

"Huh, thought she would have been all over that." Peter noted. His phone buzzed again.

**well i know she's unbeatable i'll ask her abt it later ^.^**

A few steps later,

**for now i gotta call up the human and guide them =^.^=**

"Geez, does she ever stop updating her status?" Asked Chara.

"She did have time to talk to me." Peter pointed out. As he strolled along a conveyor belt, he found himself in a fight with what appeared to be a volcano with a face and four legs.

"Char, status report?"

"That's Vulkin. It mistakenly believes its lava can heal people." Chara replied, a tad nervously. "Watch out."

Vulkin cheered and began launching energy all over the place. Peter considered his options while dodging.

"Uhh... Good job! I feel sooooo much better!" He encouraged.

Vulkin looked very happy. After a very hectic attack, they allowed Peter to leave.

"Geez, hope I don't bump into too many other flame monsters." Peter said. "This place is way too hot already."

"No kidding." Chara replied.

Alphys updated her status.

**gonna call them in a minute! =^.^=**

"Shouldn't you tell her you can see her messages?" Chara asked.

"I could, but this is kinda funny to me." Peter replied. "And currently, I could use a bit of funny."

The road was lined with piped spouting blue flame. The distant drone of what Alphys had called "The Core", combined with the heat and overall aesthetic produced a high tech, if uncomfortably hot environment. The path seemed to stretch on and on, with no sign of stopping.

"The whooshing sound of steam and cogs FILLS you with determination." Chara said gravely.

"Real funny." Peter replied, using the jets of air to help him jump over various obstacles. "All it fills me with is sweat and a headache at the moment. I need to install air conditioner into this thing."

**I HATE USING THE PHONE I DON'T WANT TO DO THIS LMAO ^.^**

"OK, this is starting to grate a bit." Chara said.

Peter went to respond, but found himself face to face with... An airplane wearing a beret?

"Oh no, a Tsunderplane." Chara facepalmed.

"A what-now?"

"A species of monster that seems mean, but tend to actually have a crush on whoever it engages in a FIGHT with."

"Great." Peter wouldn't admit it, as it wasn't the thing one normally brought up, but he had seen enough anime to know what to do in this scenerio.

Tsunderplane sputtered a bit. "I don't LIKE YOU, you creep!" It then launched several bomb-shaped bullets and bumped Peter with its wing. On accident, clearly.

"I can't believe I'm engaging with an anime trope airplane several miles below ground." Peter sighed, utilizing some web slinging to pass in close proximity to Tsunderplane. It looked slightly freaked out, but was also blushing furiously.

"This is weird." Chara noted. "Tsunderplane looked over for a split second. Then turned its nose up. I think you gotta flirt with it now."

"You think its weird for you?" Peter hissed. "Uh, Tsunderplane! You have very nice... wing? Flaps?"

The monster absolutely freaked out. After sputtering for about ten seconds, it allowed Peter to spare it.

"Wow. I can now say I've flirted with an airplane." Peter noted. "MJ is gonna crack up?"

"Who's that?" Chara asked. "Despite how much we've gone through, I find it interesting how little I know about you."

Peter's phone dinged again, but he ignored it. "Well you see, MJ is kinda my-"

His phone buzzed. Annoyed, he picked it up. "Jello?"

It hung up.

Peter sighed. "Anyways, she's kinda my girlfriend. We've been dating since a REALLY crazy school trip last September. She's one of the few people who managed to figure out my secret identity, and she helped to protect my friends when I couldn't reach them. She's really cool."

"Sounds that way." Chara replied. "I wish I could meet your friends. I've... never really had any myself. Asriel was the closest thing to a friend I've ever had. Too bad now I'm a ghost and all."

Peter now found himself in a fight with some sort of... rope coil? But it was on fire.

"Uh, Hi?" He asked.

"Oh, that's just a Pyrope." Chara said. "This monster is never warm enough."

"Great." Peter replied. "As though it's not hot enough already."

"Hot, HOT, HOT!" Pyrope exclaimed, sending bomb shaped bullets his way.

Peter had an idea. "Hey Pyrope, you like heat?" He stood on top of a vent and ripped it open. Blister formed on his hands, but the monster heated up.

"Hot, HOT, HOT!" It exclaimed happily, allowing Peter to spare it.

The FIGHT over, Peter's phone rang again. It was Alphys.

"Uhh! H-hi!" She said. "So, the blue lasers... Uhh! I mean, Alphys here! Hi!"

"Hi Alphys!" Peter replied, a touch annoyed. "What about the lasers?"

"The blue lasers wont hurt you if you don't move!"

"Just like blue stop signs." Chara spoke gravely. Peter chuckled.

"Orange ones, um..." Alphys stuttered a bit. "Y-you have to be moving, and they... They wont, um..."

"Hurt me?" Peter suggested.

"Exactly!" Alphys exclaimed. "You've got it!"

She hung up rapidly. A few seconds later she updated her status.

"I'm gonna mute notifications from her." Peter said.

"Thank you!" Chara exclaimed.

Moving through, Peter made sure to move through orange lasers and let blue ones move over him. In this way, progress was quite steady. At the end of the grid was a switch. Peter pressed it, and the lasers deactivated.

"This is quite over-complicated." Peter noted.

"It's better than Papyrus' puzzles." Chara replied.

In the next room over, Alphys called again.

"A-A-Alphys here! Th... the northern door with stay locked until you... s-solve the puzzles on the right and the left! I... I think you sh-should g-g-go to the right first!"

Peter shrugged. "Alright. Sounds simple enough."

Moving to the rightmost room, he came across a puzzle. It required moving some blocks around to fire at a target and complete the circuit. Peter solved it, as well as the other one, which was slightly more complicated. Along the way, he told Chara more about MJ and Ned. She in turn told him tales of the shenanigans Asriel and her had gotten up to.

"Once, we were baking a pie, and it called for cups of butter. Instead, we used buttercups." She chuckled slightly, then grew quiet. "We kinda hurt Mr. Dad Guy with that, though. Still, funny story, right?"

Peter felt that she was thinking about something else, but decided not to press. "So that's who you called Asriel's dad? Mr. Dad Guy?"

"Yup! To call his parents mom and dad felt weird, so I kinda mashed up their names."

Peter laughed. "I do that with my teammates all the time! Most of them are older than me and have a bunch of titles. I never know what to call them, so I combine all the titles and hope for the best! TChalla, the Black Panther, nearly laughed his head off when I called him "King Tchalla Black Panther Sir.""

Chara laughed. "Now that is funny!"

Next room over, like clockwork, Alphys called in.

"Uuuh, I think... umm... Hey! About the puzzles on the left and right-"

"I got those done." Peter replied, feeling sheepish. "Don't worry about it."

"Awesome!" Alphys sounded embarrassed, and promptly hung up.

"Couldn't she just shut all this stuff down?" Chara asked. "She is the Royal Scientist after all."

Peter shrugged. "Maybe Mettaton locked her out of the system? Who knows."

Past an array of vents lay a floor that looked suspiciously well tiled. Very homey. It didn't help that the next room was pitch dark. Alphys called.

"H-hey, it's kind of dark in there, isn't it?" A sound of button fiddling came from the other end. "Don't worry! I'll hack into the light system and brighten it up!"

"Told you." Chara stuck her tongue out.

Peter sighed, but suddenly his spider-sense went off. "Uh oh."

"What?" Alphys asked.

The lights came on to reveal what appeared to be the set of a cooking show. Peter could do the math.

"Oh no." Alphys said.

Light elevator music began playing as Mettaton rose up beside Peter.

"OHHHH YES!" He replied cheerfully. "WELCOME, BEAUTIES, TO THE UNDERGROUND'S PREMIER COOKING SHOW! COOKING WITH A KILLER ROBOT!"

Sparklers fell as Mettaton basked in the adoration.

"MAKE SURE TO PRE-HEAT YOUR OVENS, BECAUSE WE'VE GOT A VERY SPECIAL RECIPE FOR YOU TODAY! WE'RE GOING TO BE MAKING... A CAKE!"

"Is that a lie?" Peter asked with a grin.

"THIS CAKE IS NO LIE!" Mettaton replied as canned laughter filled the room. "MY LOVELY ASSISTANT HERE WILL GATHER THE INGREDIENTS."

"Do I have a choice?"

"FUNNY QUESTION! NO. NOW EVERYONE GIVE THEM A BIG HAND!"

More streamers fell as canned applause rang from Mettaton.

"NOW, WE'LL NEED SUGAR, MILK, AND EGGS. GO FOR IT, SWEETHEART!"

"This is embarrassing." Chara stated as Peter sighed and went to collect the ingredients. "Plus, this is clearly a trap."

"BUT A VERY TASTEFULLY CRAFTED ONE!" Mettaton replied with a wink. "NOW THAT YOU'VE GOT THE INGREDIENTS, PUT THEM IN THE MIDDLE OF THIS COUNTER!"

Peter did so.

"PERFECT!" Mettaton cheered. "GREAT JOB, HANDSOME! WE'VE GOT ALL THE INGREDIENTS WE NEED TO BAKE THE CAKE! MILK... SUGAR... EGGS... OH MY! WAIT A MAGNIFICENT MOMENT! HOW COULD I FORGET! WE'RE MISSING THE MOST IMPORTANT INGREDIENT!"

His voice dropped an octave as he picked up a chainsaw. "A HUMAN SOUL!"

He advanced on Peter menacingly until a phone call interrupted.

"HELLO...?" Mettaton asked, annoyed. "I'M KIND OF IN THE MIDDLE OF SOMETHING HERE."

"W-wait a second!" Alphys' voice came through the phone. "Couldn't you make a... couldn't you us a... couldn't you make a substitution in the recipe?!"

Mettaton looked confused. "... A SUBSTITUTION? YOU MEAN USE A DIFFERENT, NON-HUMAN INGREDIENT? ... WHY?"

"Uhh, what if someone's..." Alphys thought for a moment. "Ve... gan?"

Mettaton seemed unimpressed. "... VEGAN."

"Uh well I mean-"

"THAT'S A BRILLIANT IDEA, ALPHYS!" Mettaton exclaimed. "ACTUALLY, I HAPPEN TO HAVE AN OPTION RIGHT HERE!"

"Aren't eggs and milk not vegan anyways?" Chara asked, dumbfounded.

"HUSH CHILD." Mettaton replied. "RIGHT OVER THERE IS MTT-BRAND ALWAYS-CONVENIENT-HUMAN-SOUL-FLAVOR-SUBSTITUTE! IN A CAN, RIGHT ON THAT COUNTER!"

He pointed.

"WELL DARLINGS, GO OVER THERE AND GET IT!"

Peter sighed. Chara still looked confused.

"Is he talking to me?" She shrugged. "I thought only ghosts could do that."

"In this place, I don't even know anymore."

As Peter reached the counter, it suddenly flew up fifty stories high.

"OH, BY THE WAY, OUR SHOW RUNS ON A STRICT SCHEDULE." Mettaton interrupted. "IF YOU CAN'T GET THE CAN IN THE NEXT MINUTE... WE'LL JUST HAVE TO GO BACK TO THE ORIGINAL PLAN! SO... BETTER START CLIMBING, HANDSOME!"

Alphys called as Mettaton flew up.

"Oh no! There's not enough time to climb up!" For sounding so worried, Alphys seemed rather unenthusiastic. "F-f-fortunately, I might have a plan! When I was upgrading your phone, I added a few... features."

"Such as?"

"You see that huge button that says... "JETPACK"? Watch this!"

The phone expanded into a jetpack and landed on Peter's back.

"Talk about airplane mode!" He quipped.

"There! You should have just enough fuel to reach the top!"

"Way convenient, Doc." Chara was floating on her back, inspecting her fingernails. "A bit too convenient, actually..."

"No time for that." Peter replied, readying himself and blasting off.

Mettaton attempted to hamper his progress with some well aimed cooking supplies (which appeared to be the ingredients Peter had gathered earlier), but using his spider-sense, Peter was able to avoid them and make it to the top.

"MY MY." Mettaton said, sounding unimpressed. "IT SEEMS YOU'VE BESTED ME. BUT ONLY BECAUSE YOU HAD THE HELP OF THE BRILLIANT DOCTOR ALPHYS! OH, I LOATHE TO THINK OF WHAT WOULD HAVE HAPPENED TO YOU WITHOUT HER! WELL, TOODLES!"

He flew away.

"What about the substitution!" Peter yelled.

Mettaton returned. "OH YES! ABOUT THE SUBSTITUTION... HAVEN'T YOU EVER SEEN A COOKING SHOW BEFORE? I ALREADY BAKED THE CAKE AHEAD OF TIME. SO FORGET IT!"

He flew away as the jetpack slowly lowered Peter to the ground. Alphys called.

"Wow! We... we did it! We... we really did it! Great job out there, team!"

"Your jetpack did come in handy!" Peter exclaimed.

"Gee, thanks." Alphys chuckled. "W-well, uh, anyway, let's keep heading forward!"

"You are right, Char." Peter mused. "That was a bit too convenient."

"Let's just be careful."