A/N: This is the last chapter! Thank you all for reading and please bear with me while I get ahead with part three. I don't know what it's going to be called yet so just keep an eye out of you're interested. Sorry this isn't much of an ending but there will be more.

Enjoy :D

Chapter 39

Arthur was glad there was a space in the car park beside Hunith's car when he arrived. He'd driven a long way and knew there would be a lot of stress in his husband's side of the family so he wanted to make sure he was in as good a mindset as possible to help them. And parking was one thing almost guaranteed to make him stressed. He knew that if Hunith's car was at the hospital, she'd be there with Merlin and there was no way Merlin would have gone to see Freya yet, so Arthur made his way to the NICU, following signs closely.

When he got there, Merlin was sitting beside a large incubator, hand through one of the holes and whispering quietly. He looked tired but happy to be with his new family members.

"Girls, then," Arthur came forward, noting the name tags on the incubator.

Merlin stood up quickly and leapt into Arthur's arms happily, "I'm so happy to see you."

"I'm happy to see you, too," Artur kissed him briefly, "I missed you. How is everyone?"

"Tired," Merlin said, "We've been here for over a day. Freya took a turn for the worst early this morning and we haven't wanted to leave her."

"What happened?"

"The bleeding started again. They had to remove her womb and stuff," Merlin looked down sadly, "They can't have any more kids now."

"They have two beautiful daughters," Arthur said, "She'll be ok."

"I think I want to go and see her," Merlin decided.

"You don't have to," Arthur reminded him, "There's no pressure."

"She'd want me to see her. I want to."

"Ok. Come on, then. But then I'm taking all three of you home."

Merlin led Arthur through the hospital to the ITU and into Freya's room. Hunith shot up immediately to greet Arthur and hugged him tightly. Merlin hung around in the doorway while Arthur said hello, not bringing himself to look at Freya yet.

"Your daughters are beautiful," Merlin said to Matthew genuinely, "Congratulations."

"Thank you."

"We all need to get some proper rest at home," Arthur said to everyone, "But could you give Merlin and I a minute up here?"

"We'll say goodnight to the girls and wait by the cars," Matthew said.

Arthur was surprised that no one even tried to argue as he took Merlin's hand and led him towards the bed while Matt and Hunith left. Merlin kept his eyes on the floor, surprised by how emotional he was.

"It's alright," Arthur squeezed his hand.

They sat in chairs close beside each other and Merlin immediately started bouncing his knee up and down, refusing to look at his sister.

"Come on, Merls. It's not as bad as you think."

"Matthew's right. I don't know how you do this."

"Come on," Arthur squeezed his hand, "It just looks like she's sleeping."

Merlin forced his eyes up and looked at Freya. Arthur was right. It did look like she was just sleeping peacefully, aside from the oxygen tube in her nose and lines in her arm.

"She just had children," Merlin said to Arthur, "She should be holding them, feeding them, playing with them."

"She will," Arthur said, "But even if she were awake she wouldn't be allowed to do that yet. It's not like she's missing something other people can do."

"She hasn't even seen them. Doesn't know if they're girls or boys. What if she never finds that out?"

"I grew up without a mother. I was blessed to be able to meet her but Morgana didn't. She never knew if it Morgana survived, what she'd be called, who she'd grow up to be. She was still her mother. It doesn't matter if she'd been away for years and suddenly came back. She's no less our mother than she was the day Morgana was born and she died."

"You think Freya's going to die?"

"That's not what I'm saying. It doesn't matter that Freya's asleep and can't see her children. What's important is that she loves them and when she wakes up, she'll still love them just as much."

"The doctors don't know if she'll wake up," Merlin admitted, "I didn't tell you over the phone, I was scared it would make you too desperate to be here and you wouldn't drive safely. But she lost a lot of blood then had a major surgery. Her insides are messed up and she's weak because her pregnancy was so difficult. We're too scared to tell mum. We're hoping, given my track record for getting out of intensive care, that she'll be fine. It's just so hard to know what's going on."

Arthur wrapped his arm around Merlin and pulled Merlin close into his side, "I trust these doctors, do you?"

Merlin nodded.

"She'll be ok."

"And if she isn't?"

"Then I'll look after you. All of you. Matt, your mum, the girls. I will, I promise. We'll sort something out."

"I don't think mum would cope with loosing Freya too. Not after Will and everything that's happened to me. I don't know if I'd cope, either."

"Everything's going to be alright, Merls," Arthur promised.

"Is this really what it's like to watch someone you love die? Is this how you feel every single time I-"

"Stop it, gorgeous. I know how hard it is better than anyone but it'll be ok. She has such important reasons to live."

"Can we go?" Merlin asked, moving his gaze away and making to stand up.

"Yeah, come on. I'm proud of you."

Arthur led Merlin out into the car park to find Hunith and Matthew who were waiting by the cars. "You all look awful," Arthur said, "Are you alright to drive or do you want to come in my car? I'll pay for your parking here."

"No, no, I'll drive," Hunith said, "Matthew, you'll be coming back for dinner? You can stay the night if you'd like."

"No, I couldn't impose like that."

"Please," Huntih said, "I already have guests, what's one more?"

Matthew nodded, "Thank you."

"I'll pick up something to eat on the way," Arthur offered, "You get home, put the kettle on and sit down."

He and Merlin got into their car and Arthur started the engine.

"It's been over a month since I was last in this car," Merlin smiled, "It's covered in dog's fur."

"They looked so sad when I had to leave again," Arthur said, "I promised I wouldn't be away long."

"Let's hope that's true."

"It was the most wonderful holiday," Arthur mused quietly.

"I don't want to remember it now," Merlin said, "Not until this, whatever this is, is over. It'll make me sad to think about how quickly everything changed."

"Alright."

"It's exactly like Will, you know. One minute he was happy with a job he loved, the next minute that job killed him. And now Freya. One minute she was happy with children who she loved, the next minute, those children-"

"Don't," Arthur cut in quickly, "Stop talking in past tense, stop assuming what's going to happen. Not everything in your life turns out horribly."

"But everything else came full cycle. Remember in Camelot when it re-opened and we said that all of the previous accidents had come full cycle. The water, the fires, the explosion, all of it was like something which had happened previously. And then the second coma because we said this all started with one. But that's not true. Because what happened before I was taken to hospital and ended up comatose? My brother died. Just when I thought he was happiest in his life."

Arthur moved his hand off the gearstick to rest it on Merlin's knee, "You've looked worse than Freya looks right now," he said, "And you're still alive. She's going to be fine."

Arthur was very caring and considerate with making sure Merlin and his family were looking after themselves. He made sure they had big, healthy dinners and went to bed at a reasonable time so that they got plenty of rest. Merlin adored being back in Arthur's arms through the night and hadn't realised just how much he'd missed the way Arthur's body enveloped his or how Arthur's breath tickled the back of his neck.

He woke up to Arthur massaging his shoulders gently to stir him, "Matt's had a call from the hospital," he said, "Freya's awake."

Merlin looked at him with disorientated, sleepy eyes.

"She's still not well, Merls. Really sick. But the hospital have said they'll take her to see the babies somehow. Matthew's going to be allowed to hold them."

Merlin smiled sleepily.

"And I have a feeling I'm going to have to explain all of this again when you are actually awake," Arthur teased, pecking Merlin on the lips, "Hm?"

Merlin closed his eyes and sunk back into the bed, "I missed you," he slurred tiredly.

"It's time to get up," Arthur said, "Come on."

Merlin groaned and made himself floppy and heavy so when Arthur tried to sit him up, it was very difficult. "Come on, sleepy," Arthur laughed, "Get up."

Merlin leant against Arthur and hugged him, "I'm tired."

"You can have a nap later," Arthur kissed the top of his head, "Don't you want to see Freya?"

Merlin nodded.

"Come on, then. Your mum's made breakfast."

There was a long debate at the hospital about whether Freya would be brought to the babies or whether the babies would be brought to Freya. Matt and Hunith had gone straight up to see Freya while Arthur and Merlin waited with the twins for the decision. Merlin had wanted to see his sister but figured that Freya's mother and husband should probably take priority.

"Alright," a nurse came in, "We've decided that we're going to move the incubator upstairs, are you two coming?"

Merlin stood up immediately, his tiredness from the past few days gone. The thought of seeing his sister awake and holding her children was too joyous not to cheer him up.

He greeted Freya with the biggest grin he could manage. They were glad that the room he was staying in was large so that they were all allowed in to watch her meet her children. Once Merlin and Arthur had said hello to her and given her a hug, Merlin went outside with Matthew. For the sake of ease, they'd be carrying the babies into the room.

Matthew picked Briar up carefully and cuddled her a little bit, kissing her forehead before reluctantly handing her to Merlin. It did feel wrong for him to hold her before Freya but it made him happier that Matthew had been the first. The nurse who had come up from the NICU with them had told them already how to hold the babies properly and safely. Rose woke up and squirmed a bit at Matt's touch but she settled when she was brought closer to Briar who was still fast asleep.

The nurse held the door open for them and Freya immediately teared up at the sight of her children in the arms of her husband and brother. Hunith helped her sit up while Matt and Merlin sat on the side of the bed.

"Ok, honey?" Hunith asked Freya. Freya nodded, her eyes flicking between each of the twins in turn, "Can I?"

Matt nodded and scooted a little bit closer to her and, with a bit of difficulty, passed Rose across. She was still making little noises and moving around a bit but she gazed up at Freya in awe.

"Hello," Freya cradled her gently.

"This is-" Matthew started.

"Rose," Freya said.

"How did you know that?" Matthew asked in delighted surprise.

Freya smiled, "Instinct."

Arthur was standing in the corner, subtly taking photos so they could print them later and Freya could have them with her in hospital room. They wanted Rose to calm down a bit before handing Freya Briar but the baby wasn't used to not having contact with her twin and she was getting more and more agitated the longer she was away from her sister. It was starting to disturb Briar a bit so Matthew took Rose back and Merlin handed Briar to him so they could both calm down in his strong arms.

Freya wiped a few tears away without any shame and smiled at Hunith who also looked quite tearful. Merlin grinned over at Arthur who winked and smiled back. After a couple of minutes, Matthew passed the girls back across to his wife and then repositioned himself so he could help her. The girls were holding hands again and looking at each other, and Arthur was still taking photos.

Eventually, Hunith, Merlin and Arthur were all allowed to hold the girls too but Freya was starting to get a bit tired so, as much as she wanted to stay with her babies, they were much more sure now that she'd have a lifetime to do that once she'd had some rest. So the babies were taken back to the NICU with the promise that they could be taken home in a day or two.

Arthur took everyone home again, knowing that Freya and the babies would sleep until after lunch. Merlin went straight back to bed and slept while everyone else ate some lunch together. After they'd eaten, Hunith took Matthew back to his house to make sure the had everything ready for the twins to come home. Once Arthur had done the dishes from lunch, he went into the spare bedroom which he and Merlin were staying in and sat beside his husband, looking at him worriedly.

"Come on, Merls," Arthur stroked his hair softly, "Wake up."

Merlin opened his eyes immediately, not even pretending he'd been asleep.

"You haven't had lunch," Arthur said.

"I'm not hungry," Merlin said sadly.

"What's the matter?" Arthur pressed the back of his hand to Merlin's forehead, "Scared of all the Halloween decorations?" he teased.

Merlin smiled a bit, "I'm just tired. We've barely stopped for two months."

"I know. I thought you'd be happier than this though," Arthur said, "Everyone's going to be fine. The dream was wrong."

"Yeah," Merlin said tensely.

"What is it? No one else is here, it's just me, you can tell me."

"This is exactly what happened," Merlin said, sitting up, "In the dream, I mean. We were all so happy and then…"

"Is this what you saw?" Arthur said, "Tell me exactly what happened. From start to finish, every detail."

"It wasn't so much seeing actual things," Merlin said, "More just strong, really, strong feelings. I know I was here, in Ireland and I know you were here too. That's why I wasn't so worried about you not being able to come originally. Because I knew in my dream you were there when it all went wrong. We were happy at the start, I could feel the life, presumably the twins'. It lasted a while like that."

"But it changed?" Arthur presumed.

"So quickly. I knew someone was dead. I've only felt the way I did then twice before. When my father died and when Will died. It was horrible."

"You told me it had been all three of them," Arthur said gently, "You said you dreamt all three died during childbirth."

"I was wrong," Merlin shrugged, "I assumed that's what it must have been but I know now. Because we're all happy now and you're here. So it's going to go wrong."

"The girls are fine, Merlin. Matthew's taking them home tomorrow. And Freya's awake, they're all ok."

"But just yesterday they were saying she might not survive. It's going to go wrong," he repeated, "I know it is."

"So why are you hiding in here by yourself?"

"Because mum and Matt are so happy and if I don't want them to know that I'm not. If what I'm scared is going to happen does happen, they should enjoy all the time they have together."

Arthur held Merlin tightly, "It's not going to happen. Freya's going to be fine."

Merlin jumped as Arthur's phone started ringing in his pocket, "It'll just be Morgana. She said she'd call today."

"Check."

Arthur humoured him and got his phone out, "See? Morgana."

"Ok," Merlin sighed and rubbed his eyes, "Four times," he said, "I've had it four times. Can that really mean nothing?"

"It's paranoia," Arthur soothed, "Awful things have happened to you in the past. Of course you're going to worry about people."

"But it's not just worry. It's insanity, Arthur."

"You're not insane. You're concerned, you're anxious, it's alright."

Merlin was crying now, breathing unsteadily, "I don't want her to die."

"She won't."

They heard the front door open and Merlin desperately wiped at his face just in time for Matt to open the door. "We're heading in to the hospital now, if you want to come," he said, "Apparently there's a lot to talk through with the nurses before I can take the girls. And we need to see Freya."

"Yeah, we'll come," Merlin said.

"I was wondering," Matt continued awkwardly, "Would you two mind staying? With me. To help. I just- well- I'm useless with kids and I think I'd rather it be you than Hunith and-"

Merlin and Arthur smiled at each other, "Of course we'll help you."

Matt grinned, "Thank you. You know it'll be like, no sleep and I really have no clue what I'm doing so it-"

"It's fine," Arthur said, "We don't mind. Right, I'll pack our stuff up here, Merlin you can go and get something to eat and then we'll head out."

Hunith sat with Freya while the nurses were telling Matt how to look after the babies. Arthur and Merlin were half listening but mostly were just making sure that the twins were ready to leave with them. As usual it was Rose who got upset at being disturbed and Briar who responded to her sister's fear. Merlin was hushing Rose gently, holding her in his arms and talking to her softly. They knew that once she was calm, it was most likely that Briar would calm too and Matt was currently holding Briar while the nurse talked to him.

"There you go, that's better," Merlin said, smiling at Rose as he rocked her gently in his arms and she finally settled, "That's better. There's nothing to be scared of. I bet you're just cold, are you? Nasty nurses took you out of your nice warm bed next to your sister. You were all warm and cosy but now look, hm? Not used to being out in the freezing cold. Don't worry, we'll wrap you up warmly soon. Then you can go give mummy a cuddle, how exciting is that?"

The babies were swaddled in blankets and Matthew handed the staff cards and chocolates to say thank you. Then he picked up Briar who was now sound asleep and led Merlin, still holding Rose, and Arthur, holding the bags, up to the ITU. Arthur quickly popped down to the cars to put the bags away and then returned to Freya's room. Merlin was nowhere to be seen but Hunith and Freya were each holding one of the twins and smiling.

Arthur smiled, said hello to Freya and asked how she was feeling. She looked a little confused as she said she was feeling much better before asking, "Is Merlin not with you?"

"No," Arthur said with a frown, looking to Matthew for an explanation.

"He didn't want to come in," Matt said, "Thought it would be crowded in here. He said he'd wait for us."

"By the cars?"

"I assume so."

Arthur sighed and apologised, excusing himself from the room. Before he could leave, Freya stopped him, "Is it me?" she asked

"Is what you?"

"Did I do something? Is that why he won't see me?"

"You haven't done anything," Arthur assured her, aware of the intensity of the gazes of all three of them on him, "He's tired. He'd been away from home for two months and we don't know how long it'll be before we get back. There are a lot of emotions swimming around inside him. I'll go find him."

He made his way back to the cars, taking a the most direct route he could think of so he ended up back in the car park. Merlin was sitting on a bench by a flower pot, jiggling his knee up and down.

"She looks so much better today," Arthur said as he sat down.

Merlin placed his hands over his ears tightly. Arthur carefully took Merlin's wrists and lowered his arms. "Do you want to go home?" he asked, "Have a rest, see the dogs and then come back?"

Merlin nodded, "I'm too scared to be happy here," he said, "Because I was happy in the dream and then… you know. I want to go home and then when she's better, when she's definitely better, come back."

"If that's what you really want," Arthur said, "The car's already packed, remember? We just have to drive home instead of to Matt's."

He nodded again and swallowed thickly.

"But," Arthur said, "If you ask me, when you were sitting with Rose earlier, talking to her and looking after her, you looked happy. And nothing disastrous has happened."

"You think I'm mad," Merlin sighed.

"No," Arthur squeezed his hand, "I'm more paranoid than anyone. But I think these dreams are something we're thinking too much into."

"Then why did I have them?" Merlin asks, "The only other dreams I've had which are so vivid are the ones about Will. And they're true, he's gone, he's dead and-"

"Stop it. You've said it yourself, the dreams you had about Freya are not anything you can actually see. They're just feelings, your fears. It's nothing like Will. She's worried that she's done something to upset you."

"Freya is?"

Arthur hummed, "They're worried about you."

"It's them that need worrying about, not me."

"And you're doing all that worrying. On your own. Two choices," Arthur said, "We go home or we move here."

"Move here?"

Arthur nodded, "Not forever. But if we want to be here to help Matthew and look after Freya, we can't have half a life in England. You're too torn. With your family here but work and the dogs at home. And you haven't been there for over a month. You need time in one place to sort everything out. We'll take time off work wherever we are, no one will mind. There's no reason for us to have to be there at the moment. You can choose, wherever you'll be happier."

"Here," he said, "I want to be here."