A lifetime of laughter, at the expense of the death of a bachelor

- Panic! At The Disco - Death of a Bachelor -

She was quiet for a moment. "I like it, when it involves you," she said, softly, uncertainly. "I never planned on it happening... But it could be nice."

He nodded just a little, his eyes closing as he breathed slowly. "So if I asked?" he ventured finally. His heart picked up pace and he willed it back down. This wasn't natural to him, it was breaking every rule he'd ever set. But Christ did he want it. "Hypothetically. What do you think you might say?"

She felt herself blush, and she was glad that they were both in positions where they couldn't see each other's faces. "I would say yes," she whispered, swallowing nervously.

"Okay," he said quietly. He let himself process that for a minute. Then he smirked, shifting around until he found her left hand, wiggling the ring off off of her finger and pushing her away from his chest a bit until he could see her face. He held the ring up between them with a bit of a smile, though his heart was pounding again and there was nothing he could do about it. "So. Lorna... even though I'm an asshole, would you think about marrying me?"

She took a deep breath, which hitched a little in her throat, and she teared up, emotions welling up in her chest again so that she couldn't speak, so she nodded and closed the space between them to kiss him, bumping into him a little hard in her fumbling rush. "Yes," she laughed, tears spilling onto her cheeks, and she kissed him again. "Yes."

He waited, and it took forever. And then she was kissing him fiercely.

He laughed in relief, kissing her back with equal enthusiasm. "Oh, good," he managed when he had a breath, smiling. "Because otherwise I was never going to want to talk about feelings again." He felt things he didn't have words to describe. Abject... happiness. Not the feral pleasure of a kill, or the quiet contentment of a night with Harrison, but something pure and intoxicating. It filled his lungs until there was barely any room for air, his eyes alight. Harrison was mirroring his expression, though with considerably more waterworks. He handed her her ring back.

She put it on, feeling stupidly giddy, a kind of high that not even heroin had ever offered her. She'd never even imagined that something like this could happen to her. Most of her life, she'd eschewed the ways of normal people, had gone against the grain and had done things that the average person would never dream of. She'd pitied Malcolm, when he'd bought that ring. He had never been her equal, and they had only been together for months before he thought to pop the question. When she had first slept with Sebastian, she'd been at the tail end of 24. Now? The other day she'd realized her birthday had come and gone while she was sick, and she'd turned 29. It had been a long time. "Christ, I love you," she said, and kissed him again, hands in the collar of his shirt. When she drew back again, she wiped her eyes, sniffling happily. "Fuck. We're engaged."

"Don't cry, you nerd," he grumbled affectionately, reaching out to push her hair back from her damp face, still smiling in a way he never really had before. "Yeah. I suppose we are. I'll get you a proper ring. A ruby though. Not a diamond."

"Rubies were always my favorite," she chuckled, holding up the hand with the ruby ring on it. Did people always feel this glow? "We have to get your initials engraved in the 'proper' ring, as a tribute, though. I don't know if I can change my name, so I at least want them there. I would scar them on me like you did, if not for my job." She kissed his cheek again, shifting excitedly. "Okay, I think I'm starting to get insufferably hype about this."

"Would you rather keep this one?" He reached out to take her hand, the other arm wrapping around her and pulling her against his chest, mainly so he didn't have to fight so hard to keep the giddy smile off of his face. "If you want to keep this one, that's fine, it's up to you. And for once, I'm going to say fuck it, be as happy as you want for a bit."

She laughed at that, pleased that he was willing to let them both bask in it. "I'll keep this one, for old times sake, but I think a new one is appropriate, don't you?"

"Sounds reasonable to me," he said, laughing, an oddly bright sound that surprised him. He shook his head a little, pressing his face into her hair and taking a breath. "I want to keep mine as well. We'll have to get you a new wedding band..." He trailed off, his thumb playing absently with the ring on her finger. The sentence sounded so strange on his tongue. Wedding. Would she want a wedding? He had no clue. He'd be content with a state official and a couple witnesses.

She hummed in agreement, trying to process this newfound feeling. Life with Sebastian had always been a roller coaster, but this was a twist she had never seen coming. Marriage. For real, not for a job. Come to think of it, it was one of the few significant choices she'd ever been allowed to make for herself. And it was so worth it. "Where should we do it?" She asked after a minute or two, voice light and airy. "I don't care if we have an elaborate ceremony or any of that shit - who the fuck would we invite, anyway - but it should be somewhere pleasant, at least."

"Then it will have to be after we've taken the network back," he pointed out, a touch relieved that she didn't want to go elaborate. "I don't care, though. Somewhere I can secure. Other than that, take your pick."

"Alright, sounds like a plan to me," she chirped, running through a list of locations in her head. She wasn't sure where exactly she wanted to do it, but as long as it wasn't in a dingy courthouse and the two of them could enjoy each other afterwards, it didn't matter. She'd be happy with him. "Oh, this is going to be rich. Now I can tell Vince we're getting hitched and mean it."

He smirked at that. "I want to be there when you tell him, but I'm not certain that's wise, given how our last interaction went."

"Vince fancies himself a gentleman," she snorted, then shrugged a little. "And even if he does come at you, I still have a fast knife arm. He won't be able to touch you."

He snorted, rolling his eyes. "My knight in lacy, slinky armor."

"Hey, you watch it. It could be really unflattering armor, if you're not careful," she smirked, kissing his neck. "I'm talking ugly Christmas sweaters... Khakis..."

He laughed at that. "You could make anything look good. Let's not kid ourselves here."

"Psh, stop, you flatterer," she smirked, nuzzling into his neck a little, still reveling in the warm feeling in her chest. "Are you still gonna say things like that when we're married?"

"Nope," he said with a smirk. "Haven't you ever heard of the honeymoon phase? A couple months and then we're required by law to turn into crotchety assholes."

"I think that usually applies to people who get married after a couple of years of good times, not people who fought and got back together and then started having a good time," she scoffed, wrapping her arm around his waist and giving him a squeeze.

He smiled, but didn't reply. After a few moment's silence, he sighed. "Well. I know you're perfectly comfortable in my lap, but my arse is falling asleep. Let's at least shift to the couch.

"That couch looks like it's going to fall apart if I even sneeze on it," she said, glancing skeptically at the piece of furniture. "How about we go back to the good flat?"

"Yeah, not going to argue with that," he agreed, shifting her off of his lap and standing, giving her a hand up and into the wheelchair. He gave her another smile, full of quiet excitement, then opened the door enough for her to wheel through.

"We should have the kitchen bake us a cake or something," she said once out in the hallway, over her shoulder. "I would say we eat the one you made, but I was pissy and threw it out."

"I'd say that's a pretty valid reaction," he said with a chuckle, walking behind her. He stepped ahead to call the elevator. "Might as well make it good, if we're already asking for cake, and just get a whole meal. I don't know about you, but I haven't eaten much." He glanced at her, suddenly remembering the fact that she'd been in a hospital bed again just hours ago. "How are you feeling, anyway?"

She shrugged. "I ache, but otherwise I'm okay. Surprisingly good, considering," she replied, rolling herself into the elevator as the doors opened. "It wasn't the worst thing I've ever done to myself. Not the worst overdose."

"That sentence isn't as encouraging as you seem to think it is," he grumbled, following after her and hitting the button for her floor. He leaned back against the wall. "I should tell Jim sooner rather than later."

"Yeah, he might get a little upset if we wait too long to clue him in," she sighed, twiddling her thumbs. "You can make the order to the kitchen and then go talk to him while we wait. I mean, if you want to. I'd put it off because I am a coward."

"No, that sounds reasonable," he said as the elevator door opened and they stepped- or rather, he stepped and she rolled- out into the hall and toward her flat. He didn't speak again until they were inside and the door was closed behind them. "Any way we do this, we'll need witnesses," he pointed out, pulling his phone out and starting a text to the kitchen.

"God. James Moriarty, a witness at our wedding. Can you imagine?" She muttered, rolling over to the couch and transferring herself over without a fuss. "What if he wears a tux?"

He shrugs. "We've seen him in a tux before." He'd fucked him in a tux before, but he decided not to bring that up. He sent the text, and then glanced back up at Lorna. "What would you think about him being my best man? Since he'll be there anyway, I mean..."

"Doesn't matter to me, sure, do it," she shrugged, then paused. "He's not invited to our first post-marriage fuck, though. Second one, whatever, I don't care, but not the first one."

He gave her a withering look. "Honestly, Harrison, how much of a boor do you take me for?" He rolled his eyes, walking over to steal a solid kiss. "I'll be back soon."

"I was telling you so you can pass it on," she chuckled, kissing him back and then nodding. "Alright. Good luck."

"Oh, that'll be fun to bring up," he snorted sarcastically, heading out the door and for the lift.

Ten minutes later, he was knocking quietly on Jim's door in the infirmary.

If Jim hadn't recognized the knock, he would have refused entrance. He was eating a rare meal. But he did recognize it, so he swallowed his mouthful of potatoes, and said, "Come in."

He stepped inside, closing the door quietly behind him. He turned to look at Jim, resisting the urge to smile. It was good to see the man eating. "Sorry to interrupt, sir, but I thought this shouldn't wait."

Jim narrowed his eyes a little, looking at Sebastian suspiciously. What was different about him? He looked... weird. "What is it?"

He cleared his throat slightly. "Permission to speak freely, sir?" he asked after a moment.

His brows furrowed a little more, but he waved his hand, which he realized still had a fork in it. He set it down. "Yes, go on already."

He cleared his throat. "Harrison and I are going to get married, sir."

If Jim had had anything in his mouth, he would have sputtered. As it was he was still flabbergasted, and it showed. Moran? Get married? This Moran? What? "You're what?"

He straightened himself slightly, but didn't back down. "Getting married, sir. As you and I discussed earlier."

"Holy shit," he muttered, leaning back and rubbing his eyes. "I have been surprised before, but this... You, Moran? Really? Never could have predicted it. Next you'll tell me you're having a fucking baby. Which- by the way- No. No, you cannot, I'm not budging on that one," he said distractedly, eyes sharpening for a moment before they wandered off again, just trying to absorb. Him, needing time to absorb. Unbelievable.

"Wasn't going to ever come up, sir," he said with a small snort. He watched the man try and absorb. It was an odd thing to see, James Moriarty scrabbling with surprise. It was the first time he'd ever seen the man like this. But what could he say? He was surprised as well. The whole thing was rather ridiculous, but it was fantastic all the same.

He waited a few moments, gave him time to settle, then said, "It won't be anything big. Just a couple of witnesses and a judge. But I was wondering, sir... Jim... I was wondering if you'd be there. Be my best man."

Jim opened and closed his mouth, then cleared his throat, finding himself surprisingly pleased. "Alright," he agreed, after a moment of hesitation. He would examine his feelings about this later. "I suppose it could be... amusing."

He smiled just a little at that, relieved that that had gone over well. It very easily could not have. He nodded. "Great. Thank you, boss. Unless there's anything else, I'll leave you be." He'd considered bringing up Harrison's sex comment, but had decided Jim would likely see it as a challenge, and that it was best left unsaid unless it needed to be.

"Sure, yeah, mazeltov, or whatever," Jim snorted, waving his hand again. "Have some champagne. Bye."

He left quickly, a smirk slipping into place as he closed the door behind him and headed back upstairs.

Lorna looked up from her phone as he came in, smiling. "Hey, you're alive and seemingly unscathed. Went well, did it?"

"Much better than I thought it would," he agreed, flopping down next to her with a sigh, reaching up to rub at his eyes. "I've never seen him so shocked in his life."

"Yeah, well, it's a very unpredictable turn of events," she admitted, tossing her phone onto the coffee table and shifting to lean against him. "I'm still absorbing it myself."

"I don't think it's completely hit me," he admitted, arm around her. "It's fucking strange."

"You can say that again. Strange... But good. I like it," she said, nodding her head a little, to herself.

He shifted his arm around her, tucking her further up against him, smirking just slightly. "God... imagine us a few years ago if someone told us this would happen."

"I'd rather not," she chuckled, "That would have been unpleasant. I'm too busy being happy right now."

He shook his head a little, still smiling, and shifted a bit until he could bend down to kiss her.

She kissed him back, just enjoying everything about him, and then there was a knock at the door, and she sighed. "Food."

"Food!" he agreed, jumping up and heading for the door, glancing at the security monitor before opening it. He took the tray from the attendant and closed the door carefully with his right hand, bringing the food over, setting it down and pulling the lid off. He let out a hungry groan, eyeing seared ahi tuna, fried rice and veg, seaweed salad, wine, some sort of chocolate rum cake... "I love having a kitchen at our beck and call."

"Oh my god, this looks so good," she moaned, grabbing the plate closest to her and scooting to sit on the floor in front of the coffee table, her stomach rumbling. It was very, very odd to think that at the same time the previous day, they'd been in the middle of a terrible fight. Hell, a couple of hours ago they were still, technically, fighting. And now they were engaged. Life with Sebastian Moran was never dull.

He grabbed his own plate, starting to dish out food, his stomach rumbling now that the end of his distraction-induced fast was in sight. He took a huge bite of tuna, and then closed his eyes with a sigh, letting it melt across his tongue.

She tried to keep herself from gobbling it down too fast, but she hadn't eaten since the previous day, either - having woken up to a note like the one in her hand, she hadn't stuck around in the infirmary very long. God, was that only a few hours ago?

He didn't talk much until he finished his main course, sitting back against the couch with a contented expression and eyeing the cake. He looked over at her, relaxing, and was hit all over again with how fucking happy he was. It was frightening.

"It's a dumb thought and I know we can't ever do it, but I just wanna like, fucking announce it over the P.A. system and shit," she said after a few minutes, voice wistful.

"Yes, well, that is a tad bit beyond what Jim would tolerate, I think." He sat up, starting to cut a sizable chunk of cake.

She watched him, mouth watering. She regretted throwing out his cake. "Yeah, I'd say that's beyond what you would tolerate," she smirked.

He set the slice on her plate, molten center oozing, and turned to cut his own. "That's a valid point. But I'm more lenient than he is, it seems."

She nodded with her head tilted, her mouth already full of cake. "I know. S'crazy. Who are you even?" She teased.

"Mmm... Jim's lost faith in my judgment," he snorted. "The first thing- the first thing, mind- that he brought up was that he would not be permitting us to have children." He rolled his eyes. "Fucking honestly."

She laughed. "Sebastian, he said that because he was in shock and he needed to exert control again. Because he thought this was impossible too."

He sighed, reaching over to steal a bite of her cake. "Mmm... you got the better piece." He smirked, reaching for another bite.

"Hey, fuck off!" She laughed, shifting to push him away, making a mess of the mouthful she already had.

He laughed. "Oh come on, we're getting married, that means you're supposed to share," he shot back, smirking.

"It's only after we get married you get half my cake," she retorted, hunched over her cake protectively. "Until then, back off!"

He grumbled, sitting back, but returned to his cake with a small smirk. "Fine."

"Troublemaker," she rolled her eyes, eating another forkful of cake.

He raised an eyebrow, and looked over at her slowly. "...Duh...?"

"I'm gonna beat you up, better be careful. I'll roll at you in the dark, scare the crap out of you," she threatened, just the hint of a smirk on her lips.

He rolled his eyes. "Me startled means you're dead," he pointed out dryly.

"I've startled you before, and survived. I mean, it was close, but..." She hummed, grinning at him and winking once.

He snorted derisively, not responding because of his mouthful of cake. Eventually he just shifted closer, wrapping his arm around her and trying to use his fork with his bad hand, eyes a bit narrowed in concentration.

She finished off her slice and then just settled against him, her eyes closed, body weary and sore from disuse.

He gave up trying to eat with his injured hand, setting his fork aside and leaning against her, eyes closed.

"I should probably go to bed," she murmured, eyes still closed. She didn't move. "Technically, I haven't slept at all. Just been unconscious."

"True. Sleep is important," he said softly, his fingers combing through her hair.

She nodded, falling silent. God, she loved him so much. And they'd both decided a while ago that reasons to split up would be unlikely to come up. But just the feeling of real commitment, of both of them deciding once and for all that they wanted to stay together for the rest of their lives, if possible... She'd never expected it would feel so good. In another life, she might have liked to take his name, too.

He shifted after a few minutes, standing, and stooping to shift her into his arms. Then he headed for their room.

She yawned as he put her in bed, and then tugged gently at his arm. "Bed."

He smiled a little, kicking off his shoes and undressing, before crawling in beside her. "Sleep, Lorna."

She mumbled something and managed to toe her shoes off before she passed out, curled up against him.

"Goodnight, fiancée," he murmured quietly, just trying the word out on the empty room. He immediately felt like an idiot, and rolled his eyes at himself, hugging her a bit closer and dropping off.

When she woke up again, she wasn't sure what time it was. She yawned, then shifted a little in Sebastian's arms to get a look at the clock on the wall. Huh. A decent, late morning time. Miracles existed.

She mulled over the night before while she waited for Sebastian to wake up. Some part of her was very insistent that it had been a dream, but she pushed that aside and let herself bask again. The urge to tell someone was overwhelming, but she hadn't had friends since she took over the grifting department, and her family was all dead. One by the fault of the man she was engaged to. Somehow, she didn't think her mother would disapprove too much. She herself had married both a hitman and a drug lord, and had been very much in love with both of them.

Well, there was only one way to satisfy this itch, then. She couldn't wait to see the look on Vince's face.

Sebastian woke slowly, enjoying the feeling of having slept in. It was rare for him. He shifted a little, tugging Harrison a little closer and burying his face in her hair. "Morning..."

"Morning," she murmured, smiling a little to herself. It was always cute when he got cuddly in the morning, but she wouldn't try to tell him that.

"How'd you sleep?" he asked, rolling onto his back and stretching out with a grunt.

"Really, really deeply," she yawned. "It was nice. How did you sleep?"

"Same," he sighed, rubbing his eyes. He glanced at the clock. "Shit... I need to go relieve Adler... Fuck, I'll be glad when Jim is back on his feet." He stood, heading for the shower.

She sighed at knowing he was going to have to leave, but decided it was better to eat breakfast than mope about it. So she gingerly got up, put on some fresh clothes, and went out into the kitchen to get a bagel and strawberry jam out of the fridge.

He came out of the shower a few minutes later, freshly shaved, and walked into the kitchen to find coffee. "Hey, you're standing! It's almost like you grew a little. Maybe you won't seem so short now," he said with a smirk, grabbing the coffee pot to fill.

"Hey, in an earthquake, you're the one who's fucked, not me," she snorted, polishing off the last of her bagel and sipping her coffee. "This is starting to hurt, though. Think I'll sit."

"How am I fucked in an earthquake, exactly?" he asked, filling his mug and replacing the pot, leaning back against the counter and taking a long sip.

She shrugged, hopping onto the counter. Alright, hopping wasn't the right term. Wiggled, maybe. "I fit in real nice in the space between debris. You? Psh."

"That just means I get to die quicker," he retorted with a grin. "Alright. Adler. I'll see you later. Don't die."

"Hurry back," she waved, "I really wanna crush Vince's soul tonight."

He snorted with laughter, almost putting a mouthful of coffee out his nose. "Alright. I'll be back as soon as I take over from Adler. Who says I can't multi-task?"

She laughed, nodding. "Alright, alright, go, or Adler is gonna make an attempt on your life."

"Because I'm so scared," he muttered, heading out the door and for Adler's office.

She rolled her eyes and settled down for a day in front of the television, deciding it would pass the time the quickest.