Then, as gently as he could, so not to startle Sans and slowly ease him into it, he allowed for Sans to see into his own memories. Starting from when he and Azzy decided to make Asgore a Butterscotch Cinnamon Pie for his birthday, a happier setting with a happy family should be safe enough right?
"Hey Azzy, you got the Cimmanonam right?" a much younger looking Chara called out as Asriel pulled out the container of it from one of the many drawers and climbed up on the stepstool.
"Got it! And it's pronounced 'Cinnamon' Char!" Asriel laughed then looked over the Recipe Book, Toriel had written for the children when they bugged her for hours on end the day before. The two were so excited to make something for the King for once, him having always done everything for the kids himself.
"Okay, okay. How many cups does it say we need again?" Chara asked, getting the measuring spoons out.
"Umm, it says 2 'T S P.' I think that's 2 teaspoons." Asriel suggested, and Chara nodded getting the one labelled '1tsp' out.
Chara got the 2 teaspoons and poured it into the big bowl with all their other ingredients mixed in, Toriel was in the kitchen too, just to ensure the kids wouldn't accidentally cut themselves especially when it came to the knives, and to wash the dishes as they were finished with them. But for the most part, she left all the cooking to the kids. Since they wouldn't stop insisting they wouldn't need help and could bake the pie themselves.
In the large bowl the milk, heavy cream, brown sugar water, cornstarch and egg yolks were already mixed together. Most of the ingredients they had to use substitutes for as not all of them were readily available here in the Underground but still they made due. Now only 3 ingredients were still missing: the whipped cream which most likely they may have had to make due without, baked pie shell (which Toriel suggested they could use snail shells or something like it.) and finally- the cups of butter.
2 of the ingredients were already there in the kitchen. Only needing to be cut in the right amount, divided and put in the bowl.
As for the butter…
"Wait.."¼ cups of butter...like, buttercups? The flowers?" Asriel puzzled, reading and re-reading the recipe page Toriel made for them both.
"I don't know Azzy, you can read that language better than me still. Haha. What do you think bro?" Chara asked, innocently.
"Ummmm….I think it means Buttercups! I know where those are. Dad has some planting in the garden!" Azzy said happily, hopping off the stool and running for the door. "Mom! I'm just going outside for a sec!" He called out to Toriel, opening the front door and picking one of the golden flowers from one of the window sills, Asgore built for his plants then paused. "Wait, what does ¼ means? Like- 1 stem, 4 petals? Or.. 4 flowers, 1 stem?"
Asriel thought long and hard, then decided to play it safe, picking 4 of the golden flowers, before closing and locking the door again and heading back to the kitchen. "Okay, I'm back!"
"Haha, you got the buttercups bro?" Chara asked.
"Yup! I wasn't sure what the ¼ part meant. So I grabbed 4 of the flowers!"
"Hmmm…" Now it was Chara's turn to puzzle over the measurement, also confused. "Maybe...4 stems. 1 petal? 1 stem, and 4 petals?"
"Maybe...we can just put all 4 flowers in and hope for the best? 4 flowers, 1 bowl?" Asriel suggested, as he was getting bored thinking about the measuring more. "I wanna mix it all up already!"
"Fine, haha. I guess 4 flowers, 1 bowl makes sense. I think?" Chara said as he leaned over the sink, rinsing the dirt and stuff off the flowers before just plopping them in whole into the bowl. "MOM! Where's the mixing spoon?!" Chara yelled, seeing Toriel was in the living room, setting up the tables and chairs.
Chara can feel Sans basically cringing in the present, wishing that he could tell the children that they were making a huge mistake.
"In the drawer! With all the other utensils, my child!" Toriel called back.
"Thank you!"
Before Chara could open the drawer, Asriel had beaten them to it, reaching in and grabbing the biggest one, that usually Asgore used. "MWAHAHA!" Asriel laughed, diabolically.
"Hey!" Chara laughed too, grabbing the second largest one belonging to Toriel.
Together, they began to mix the bowl as Asriel read the recipe page again. Reading that the batter has to be thick but not lumpy.
After both of them mixed for a solid 3 minutes by hand, it was now officially ready for the pot and oven. Though, also by the end, they had batter all over their clothes and Azzys fur since the two had a little too much fun stirring. But a good majority of it still remained in the bowl for a decently sized Pie.
"Mom! The batter is done!" Asriel was the one to call out, stepping down the step stool and pushing it aside so Toriel could join them and inspect it and prep the oven. Not wanting to risk the children burning themselves.
"Oh, you two are so dirty!" Toriel said, seeing the mess they made in the Kitchen, and how some cinnamon powder and egg shells and so on was scattered all over the counter.
"Yeahhhh but we made the batter exactly like you told us to!" Chara said this time, looking quite proud of himself.
"Hmmm I suppose. You two did pretty well, I'm proud of you both." Toriel told them both gently, "Go get washed up, your father will be returning home soon from the Castle."
"Okay!" Chara and Asriel said before going to...wherever they went to when they needed a bath.
Toriel in the meantime, used Fire Magic instead of turning on the oven to cook the Pie.
About an hour later, King Asgore finally returned home, walking in the door, only to be attacked by hugs from his two sons who both leapt up at him, glomping him. "Oho! Howdy my children!" Asgore said, with a smile on his face as he wrapped up both Chara and Asriel into a hug affectionately.
Asriel pretty much looked like a white cotton ball, after Chara had a bit of fun with the hairdryer Toriel had gotten from Dr. Gaster who'd found it in the Dump months before, trying to help Azzy dry off his fur, and ending up frizzing it up. Chara looked normal but was also sporting pretty much an afro when Azzy had done the same to him as revenge.
Sans laughed quietly at this, making a mental note to use a hairdryer on Asriel sometime.
"Happy Birthday King Dad!"
"Happy Birthday Mr. Dad Guy!"
Both kids cried out happily, cuddling as Asgore continued to carry his children.
"Oh, you remembered. Thank you." Asgore smiled, as happy as he could be at that moment. Sniffing the air, he could smell the pie as Toriel took it out to cool down. "Honey? What is that smell?" Asgore asked, walking to the kitchen after setting both Chara and Asriel to sit over his shoulders as the kids clung to his horns so as not to fall off. Both boys grinning from ear to ear happily when they could see the Pie from their higher perch. Proud of what they'd made and the fact it actually LOOKED like a Pie too.
"Surprise Gorey! The kids baked it." Toriel informed. Showing Asgore the Pie.
"Oh, you two made this?" Asgore asked, looking up slightly at Chara and Azzy and they both nodded.
"You should have heard them yesterday. They would NOT stop asking me if I'd allow them to bake this all by themselves, They wanted to surprise you, since you've done so much for us and for our Kingdom."
"Oh, you two didn't have to do that."
"We did because we wanted to!" Chara gleefully announced.
"Uh huh, and cuz your the bestest King ever! And the best Dad in the whole world!" Asriel also admitted.
"Oh am I?" Asgore smiled, reaching a hand up to each of them, lightly tickling their bellies as his sons giggled trying to push his big ol' paws away.
"Hahaha! STOP!" They both laughed.
"Alright, Hun, put your robe away and go wash your hands then we can all have dinner together." Toriel scolded slightly, though she too was chuckling. Watching her boys, she couldn't dream she could be any happier than this day.
"Okay Tori." Asgore said in a loving manner, as Toriel set the Pie on the table, and he leaned down slightly, kissing her on the forehead, one hand holding the children to ensure they wouldn't slip off.
"EWWWW" Both Chara and Asriel said, like any typical child whenever they saw their parents being romantic in front of them.
Toriel smiled, returning the kiss, before reaching up to grab Azzy and Chara off of Asgore's shoulders and put them in their proper seating arrangements, then went to sit as well waiting for Asgore to return.
Asgore went to his bedroom, putting away his robes and crown and went to clean his hands, and came back a minute later seeing his family already at the table.
Sans seemed to enjoy watching this, though he also seemed sad that such a wedge had formed between Asgore and Toriel.
Chara smiled, sensing the bitter happy feeling, though overall, happy energy coming off Sans soul, that he almost felt bad for what was to happen next, also sharing the same feelings as well about how Asgore and Toriel were treating each other now.
Toriel and Asgore both helped in serving the same even amount of slices out. And Asgore was the first to take the first bite.
At first, everything was normal. Loving family of 4, enjoying a nice family meal and each other's company. Absolutely picture perfect. Like a portrait, it seemed this day was almost a little….too perfect.
Then, it happened.
A choking sound rang out in the quiet, happy home. An alarmed family of 3, each collectively turning their heads, seeing as one of their own seemed to be having trouble bringing it down. The struggle for breath, the frantic pulses of magic spewing out, more choking and gagging, a call for help.
Asgore collapsed. The chair fell back and he was unconscious.
Screams rang out around the house, Toriel telling the children to go find a Monster that knew healing magic as she cared for her downed Husband.
Chara and Asriel running out of New Home faster than they'd both ran before, tears practically streaming down Asriel's cheeks. An overwhelming amount of guilt fills Chara's soul and body, like a dam ready to burst open.
They entered the Castle first, only finding to see everyone had gone home as well, they then ran to Hotland, and found a Monster there willing to help the King. They brought him to New Home. Both children and Toriel feared the worst that Asgore had Fallen Down. Luckily he didn't, they were informed.
Several hours passed, as the Monster looked over what was wrong and finally, confirmation.
It was the Buttercup Flowers that did it. The Monster had found a whole stem stuck in Asgore's throat, and informed the family he'd need bed rest for at least a week, with a visit from the doctor once a day to make sure there were no more toxins left in his body.
Toriel waited a whole day before she questioned the children. Probably in too much shock, as a result from the scare. Chara informed Asriel not to tell their mother, and to just make an excuse if she asked them, to which Asriel agreed at first.
The day later, she indeed questions them, speaking to Chara first in private, as Asriel listened from the next room, standing in the doorway as Chara laughed his way out of the lie. That perhaps Asgore had the flower stuck in his fur and didn't wash himself well enough and it just so happened to get mixed in the food, he'd said. Smiling. Hiding the pain and overwhelming guilt of what they'd done.
Sans immediately gave Chara a big mental hug, sensing that this was something that they still carried a lot of guilt about.
Chara accepted the hug, not saying much as he mentally kicked himself for being so stupid back then.
Then it was Asriel's turn as well to be questioned. He pretty much said the same lie Chara did, only unsuccessful as he could not stop the tears from spilling out once he started which more or less gave them both away. However, Toriel never chose to bring it up for some reason.
Several months later, Asgore was back to perfect health, and the kids were pretty much never trusted into the kitchen again. Least not til they were a little older anyways, maybe.
Asriel and Chara were hanging around near the Dump, having both found a camera there and were using it to take pictures of each other making funny faces.
"Hey...remember that time we tried making a Pie for Dad?" Chara brought up suddenly, when Asriel had left the lens cap on, after making Chara make his "creepy face" as revenge for him doing the same thing before too.
"Huh? ….OH! Yeah, when we got the Buttercups and Cups of Butter recipe mixed up, right?" Asriel asked. To which Chara simply nodded.
Happy energy gone.
"I should have laughed it off, the way you did Cha…" Asriel pouted, his floppy ears looking even more droopier than ever. "Mom was so mad at us. I felt so bad… We really messed up, didn't we? Even though she didn't say anything about it, but..I could tell. But um, why did you bring that up Cha?" Asriel tilted his head slightly, confused.
"...I think...I may have a plan that will free us all." Chara said simply, not looking at Asriel and messing around with some random piece of plastic he'd found. "And it involves using the Buttercups from the Pie Incident."
"Huh?" Asriel questioned, now even more confused. "Wait, I don't get-?"
"You need a Human Soul to get through the Barrier right?" Chara continued, "Well...I have a Human Soul. Right here." Chara said summoning out his red one in front of Asriel to see, after finally learning how to do that, by watching the monsters do it, without the need to go into battle to see it. "We can use MY SOUL Az."
"B-But- It won't b-break the barrier just-"
"I know Az, That's why I'm telling YOU this. And, only you. Because…" Chara hesitated a moment as he sucked in a breath before continuing, "I mean...we don't know if we'll ever get another human to fall down here. We might not get another chance at this. Humans only live for so long anyways, and...well…" Chara swallowed, still holding his SOUL in his hands before he turned back to face his adopted sibling. "Azzy, I want YOU to be the one to absorb my SOUL and free everyone!"
Asriel gasped, mouth hanging open, not expecting that. "Ch-Chara…! I-"
"You've always said, you wanted to be a good King some day, when eventually YOU get the Throne! So, this'll show Dad you're ready for it, you won't even have to do anything to kill me. I just need those buttercups like, when we baked Dad that Pie. And, I can just...you know. End myself. It's my choice, right? It'll be easy, and eventually, when I'm...gone. You can take my SOUL, cross the Barrier and go to the Surface. Gather 6 more Human SOULs and BOOM! Goodbye Barrier!"
"I...Chara, I don't know…" Asriel hesitated.
"Please, I don't...I don't want to kill any Monsters." Chara said, his shoulders shaking. As he stared back down at his own red soul, almost seeming disgusted."It's either that or...this. I'd rather choose my own destiny, and I think, this is mine. It must be why I'm down here, and, I'd rather, my best friend and brother be the one to handle my SOUL."
"You were the one who found me Az, and took care of me when I was injured, and we've been together ever since. You're the only one I can trust with my plan. Together, we can save the Monsters from this hellhole. You deserve to be up on the Surface with everyone! Please…"
"I…" Asriel hesitated, looking at Chara first, in the eyes and then also down at their red soul, as if sensing his determination from it. Asriel thought about it for at least 5 minutes before, finally, he looked back up at his sibling looking just as determined as Chara. "A...Alright. I'll help you, in any way I can. If...If you think this is the right thing to do. Then we'll do it. Together."
Chara smiled at him, "I knew I could always count on you."
"Of course, I'd never doubt you Chara. You're my best friend."
"And you're mine."
And maybe now, I can pay you all back this way finally for letting me into your lives...
Despite how tired Sans was, he seemed to be figuring out where this was going and he mentally hugged Chara again, almost seeming like he wished that he could somehow talk to their younger self and convince them to find another way. Gaster, meanwhile, had fallen asleep leaning against Papyrus.
Papyrus had also happily fallen asleep, he was so comfy resting against his father, unable to help it.
A few days later, Asriel had successfully managed to sneak away with as many buttercups as he could from their Dads garden. Asriel helped in secretly grinding the little flowers, mincing them into near-dust and, when Tori or Asgore weren't looking, sprinkling them in Chara's food and drink and always ensuring he'd be the one filling Charas plate to sneak in the ground flowers when he got the chance.
At the table, Chara did his best to hide the uncomfortable feeling from their parents. As he didn't want them to suspect anything and ruin the plan.
About 2 weeks passed of this, and eventually it got to the point where Chara would have to be bedridden. Monsters came and went to check on their human prince, but thanks to Asriel's careful grinding, they never could detect the toxins in Charas body. And everyday, Asriel continued to mix the flowers that he helped feed to Chara.
One month since the announcement of the plan.
"I...I don't think I like this idea anymore, Char." Asriel said one day, when their parents weren't home. Toriel was busy getting groceries from Gersons, while Asgore was out in the garden planting and watering as always. Asriel was by Charas bed, kneeling, both hands gently holding Charas own who was pretty much at this point at Deaths' door.
"I...th-thought..you said….you w-wouldn't doubt me…" Chara replied to them, weakly. Doing his best to look slightly angry at Asriel. They'd come so close. Maybe, just one more day and Asriel could absorb his SOUL and continue with the plan.
"Wh-What? No..I'm n-not doubting you! I-I just…" Asriel hesitated biting his lip. 'I just don't like seeing you suffering…' Asriel thought but he didn't say aloud. He sniffled fighting back tears, as he could only imagine the amount of pain Chara was currently putting themselves through to ensure the monster's freedom.
Chara seemed to mouth something, calling Asriel a crybaby. Their trademark nickname for Asriel cuz of how sensitive he was. It was meant in a teasing, affectionate sorta way, like how Sans would tease Papyrus with his puns.
"I-I'm not crying! ….B-Big kids don't cry." Asriel argued, hating the nickname as he rubbed his face on his sleeve, the other still holding on tight to Charas' hand.
"Yo...u're...going to..be a..g-great king...so-someday.." Chara told him, trying to comfort their brother, though he could barely speak as everything hurt so much.
"Yeah...I wi-will be.." Asriel whispered, still holding Chara's hand, trying to will the warmth back into their skin through his paws.
"A..And..d..you'll..b-be strong...f-for me…"
Asriel started to sniffle more, nodding fervently, "Yeah, we'll be super st-strong…!" Asriel started to sob, hating this so much. Hating seeing their brother in so much pain. Hating they were given such an impossible choice, and that Chara had made that choice for them all. Hating they were trapped behind a Barrier and that everyone was so sad all the time and suffering and-
"W-We'll free everyone t-together…! I know.." Asriel sobbed more, hiccupping between words. Not wanting to let go yet. He still had so much he wanted to do with Chara. So much more he wanted to say to them…
'Don't leave me…'
"O...one..m-more...day.." Chara whispered, knowing their end was soon.
"...I'll get more of the flowers…"
The next day.
"Chara...Can you still hear me…? We need you to wake up." Toriel's voice called out.
"Chara! You have to stay Determined! Please my son...You are the Future of Humans and Monsters...Please, wake up…" Asgore's voice called this time.
"..."
Asriel waited for quite some time for the doctors and everyone to leave the room. Waiting until they were just out of earshot before he bent down over Charas ear. "Psst...Chara..? Please...wake up...I REALLY don't like this plan anymore. Or at all…Please…"
Chara opened their mouth, but nothing came out. Asriel had to lean over them and strain his ears practically to even make out what they were saying at this point.
"..."
"N-no...you're right.. You're right Char. I..I said...I said, I'd never doubt you. And I won't." Asriel sniffled. "S..Six right? We just..need six more souls. That's it."
"..."
"Y-Yeah..And..we'll do it to-t-together..even if..it's not YOU. You're right.."
Chara looked at their crying sibling. There was a mix of pride, pain mostly, but..something else. Grief perhaps.. That this would be their last memory of their family, grieving over HIM.
A Human. And one of the very race of Humans that had locked them all Underground.
A Human, who couldn't even tell the difference between cups of butter, and buttercups. And could have helped cause the death of their King.
A Human, who couldn't even earn the love of their own parents, and had to go Underground for the warmth they never got. From a race of people who were all suffering just as much as he, and still practically gave him the world.
Chara accepted his fate. He'd had no doubt in his mind at this current point he'd done the right thing. How could he even THINK of taking a Monsters soul?
Monsters were better than Humans in every way possible, Chara concluded, and he saw it all in that of his sibling, loyal to the very end.
Chara gave Asriel the weakest, most genuine smile he could possibly give, all of his strength leaving his body as he died.
His red soul drifted in the air. And Asriel absorbed it.
Sans was silent for several seconds as this first part if the memories faded away. "so, you didn't die of an illness, or at least not a natural one." He said quietly, but not accusingly. "i'm sorry that you felt like you had to do all of that for us. i can't imagine what it would be like, seeing memories isn't the same as experiencing it. and then that wasn't even the end…" He continued before trailing off and giving Chara another mental hug, remembering the story that he had been told when he was younger about the only human that had ever lived as one of their own.
"...Hey, Azzy.." Chara thought, now one with Asriel's soul. "If I...could have just one more request...I'd like to see the golden flowers outside my village…"
Asriel thus, carried Chara's dead body, Chara in control secretly as his mind became semi corrupted by the sheer power he and Asriel now wielded in that of their half-Boss Monster/Half Human form. At least probably doubled that of what Charans could wield, although that was also impressive, but THIS Chara knew better. This former one did not.
Power had consumed him so much so he forgot what the original plan was and his mind wanted to use Asriel's power to get revenge on his human village, where Chara had originated from before he fell into the Underground.
Asriel was scared, simply allowing Chara to control their shared body, and not really knowing what to expect as he watched through their shared vision as Chara brought their own dead body to the surface and saw the flowers. There was a brief moment of peace, as Chara, controlling their hybrid body, laid their dead corpse to rest.
Suddenly behind them, voices rang out. It was Chara's human father that laid the first blow as they'd thrown a sharp sword at the hybrid. "YOU MURDERED MY CHILD YOU DAMN MONSTER!"
"MURDERER!"
Rage.
Asriel sensed this, trying to cull Chara and calm them down. Now realizing just a little too late what Chara was wanting to do.
"Let me go Az! We need their human souls!" Chara called, trying to use the SOUL collecting as an excuse to mostly justify their revenge plot, wanting to REALLY see what their shared body could do.
See how much he could tear his dad apart for all the times he'd caused his son pain.
"NO! Chara, please...Let's just go back!" Asriel shouted, still trying to stop Chara.
More spears, swords, Axes and so on entered their Hybrids body.
"I thought you said you'd never doubt me! THIS is what Humanity is like, Asriel! They all deserve death and JUDGEMENT for what they've done!"
"Chara, please! This isn't like you!" Asriel sobbed, no longer seeing the kind, Chara they'd befriended. "Chara, please, what's wrong?! Let me help!"
More Humans came to attack the Hybrid.
"Asriel please, we need to fight back or they're going to kill us! They're going to kill YOU! Asriel!"
The Hybrid had doubled over when a particularly sharp sword went through their chest, just barely missing their Godsoul.
Chara mentally turned to their sibling, "ASRIEL PLEASE! ONLY I WAS THE ONE WHO WAS SUPPOSED TO DIE! NOT YOU TOO!" Chara screamed, now even THEY were getting scared.
Still Asriel chose not to fight back, holding back Chara as their Hybrid body took blow after blow…
CRACK!
They both felt it.
Chara's human mother had thrown a kitchen knife, that just so happened to be at the right angle as it hit the Hybrids body dead center in the chest.
Their GodSoul Shattered.
Back in the present, Sans flinched at this, even though he didn't feel as much pain as Chara and Asriel had felt then, but even so, Chara may have caught a slight flicker of a thought where that kitchen knife was replaced with a pink spear...
Now, Asriel was the one to take over the control.
"Ch...Cha...c-come...come on..i-it's...t..time to go.." Asriel whispered, as bits of their Hybrid body was already starting to turn into dust.
Chara said nothing. Even as Asriel commanded their shared body to pick up Chara's corpse and bring it back. Chara was silent.
Asriel shuddered when he felt Chara smiling the whole way back.
Hide the Pain. Hide the Anger. Hide the sorrow…
Eventually, with staggered steps. The Hybrid returned to the safety of the barrier, and into Asgore's Throne Room where the King and Queen were searching for them.
By this point the Hybrids body was already half turned to dust.
"ASRIEL!" Toriel cried, reaching their child first as Asriel collapsed into their arms.
Asriel had wanted to say something, but the instant he started to fall he'd burst into a pile of dust upon contact with the Queen. Dust spread across the floor of the Throne Room…
And the Memory ended.
"And now you know..And uh..sorry...for..yeah.." Chara didn't know what to say, noticing that little flinch towards the end and now worried he might have accidentally made Sans's trauma so much worse.
"it's fine." Sans said quietly. "i'm sorry that you had to go through all of that."
"It's..fine. Honestly, the only thing I regret about that day was that...it really was kind of my fault Asriel died too. It was only supposed to be me, and he'd become King and help the Monsters live peacefully with the Humans. Like I'm doing. Ugh, I seriously messed that up.. That's why I'm so hesitant if I should even tell Mom and Dad about it. I know, I probably should…And, that everything that happened between them and- maybe even those dead Amalgamates might have also been my fault. I don't know…Charans scratched at his elbow a bit feeling awkward again.
"And...for the record, I am still convinced Monsters are better than Humans. I mean..just lookit the mess Jessica caused! What she did to you and even sending Papyrus to jail- I know she was my friend and, she became better in the end even sacrificing her own life to save your Dad, but- if anything she should have been going after Dad! He's the one that killed her kid! It still makes me so mad you had to be the one to suffer… And you didn't even do anything…. but- I'd sooner actually try again and kill myself than hurt any living Monster. Screw what some demon kid-thing. Wants. I wouldn't even kill Jerry and you know how he's like." Chara chuckled, trying to joke a bit knowing this was a pretty dark subject, and he still wondered if he'd accidentally hurt Sans more than helped him to understand.
"I swore to myself that day, I'd never harm a Monster. Not in a million years, you've all been through a lot and- even though I do miss Alphys, and everyone...I'm not going to RESET. Not that I HAVE access to the button, but...you know- We're...just gonna have to live with what we got and make the most of it. And, I'm sure Undyne could get another girlfriend. She's tough, and like, the coolest person ever! Besides you, Az, Paps, Skeledad, and Mom and Dad of course! Heh. Maybe we can help her out, someday."
"yeah, maybe we can." Sans mumbled quietly, still seeming unsettled because of the memories but still giving Chara another mental hug. "and for the record, i trust you kid. i don't believe that you would hurt us, especially not after what you showed me. i'm so sorry that you had to be born to such awful people." Sans decided not to comment on what Chara had said about Jessica, as his own feelings on her were still somewhat complicated. On one hand, she had helped Betty do terrible things, but on the other hand, she was hurting a lot because of what happened to her daughter, it was quite possible that Betty had manipulated her to further the creatures own goals and she had tried to make things right.
"You do? I'm glad." Chara smiled, hugging him back mentally. "And thanks. But, I mean.. At least one good thing came out of it because of the way they treated me. I got to meet you, and All the Monsters, and the Dreemurrs. And, I'd never trade that part of my life- even if I messed things up, we're all free so everything worked out I guess."
"yeah. despite everything, we have survived and we are free now. and even though it would be nice if alphys was here with us, there's unfortunately not a lot we can do about that." Sans said, continuing to mentally hug Chara, before his thoughts seemed to drift to something else.
"Yeah...we'll find a way to make things work. Um, speaking of Alphys. Are you or Gaster good at robotics? Mettaton… I just realized he still needs repairing." Chara thought, only now realizing. "Alphys was the one who built his body though-"
"yeah, i'll take a look at him and i'll talk to gaster as well. though, robotics was never either of ours area of expertise and we probably shouldn't be doing any work while this tired, but i promise that i'll do anything that i can too help him." Sans replied quietly after several seconds.
"Yeah of course. Don't worry, I'm not expecting him to be fixed like- tomorrow or anything or...later? I just.. You know, I just don't wanna leave him like that. And since I kinda forgot he got broken but since we were talking about Alphys it just came back to me." Chara added, "Thanks. But please, don't push yourselves. I'd feel awful. Especially Gaster since he hasn't slept in days, he has a lot to catch up on. heh."
"yeah, i know." Sans replied quietly. "...how is mettaton doing?"
"I saw him yesterday, when I was checking up on everyone if we had any casualties from all the Kumus and- not so good. I mean- his soul in the robot body isn't shattered tho which is good. But like- he's literally in a million pieces. I think he's with Grillby and Muffet. They both got pretty beat up too."
Sans mentally nodded silently at this, seeming troubled. "are they going to be okay?" He asked after a few seconds, seeming worried and almost guilty that he hadn't asked earlier.
"I think so. Muffet had minor injuries tho, I think Grillbz got slightly more messed up trying to defend Metta from getting killed before me, mom and dad could get to the arena. But Metta suffered the most I think since he's pretty much just a torso right now." Chara said simply, also seeming troubled and made a mental note to go check up on them if Sans wasn't too tired later.
Sans was again silent for several seconds before Chara heard his quiet reply. "i wish i could have done more to help. i wish i could have resisted that thing somehow. then maybe it wouldn't have been able to hurt so many people."
"Sans.. You did all you could. I mean, you're just one skellie. Plus you did get zapped twice by that anti-magic gun thing. Honestly i'm surprised you even still HAD magic to use to fight with- No one blames you for what happened."
"but it used my magic to do that, it used my magic to make those other blobs, it used my magic to get those other human souls. and i feel like if i had been able to resist it better, maybe if i had been able to use up all of my magic before it could, or hell, if i'd even just pushed asriel out of the way instead of sacrificing myself, then it would have been stopped sooner and alphys and all of those humans would still be alive. a-and i know that logically it's not my fault, that i shouldn't blame myself anymore than asriel should blame himself, b-but i j-just can't shake the feeling that i could have, should have, done something to prevent all of this." Sans replied, starting to ramble, his feelings a mix of complicated emotions.
"Sans…" Chara hugs him mentally, "shh it's okay, it's okay… You are not the one at fault in all this. If anyone's at fault it's Betty. How would you even know that thing was going to steal your soul? I doubt you could have done much as a soul anyways. I mean, by that logic, maybe it's all mine too for holding in all HATE in the first place and for glitching the timeline so bad that all this happened. Or- for choosing to die instead of finding another way to set everyone free earlier..I don't know…"
"no, you were just a kid that was given too much responsibility. that thing said that it wanted asriel's soul, it's not like it just snuck up on me and stabbed me before i knew it was there. a-and maybe i could have burned off all of my magic before that thing could use it or something, i-i just don't know." Sans replied shakily, accepting the mental hugs.
"But- If I'd never died, or failed, mom and Dad would probably still be together and love each other and not just simply tolerating each other for Azzys sakes and mine. And, maybe Dad wouldn't have gotten as desperate as to order Alphys to start experimenting on SOULs that made the Amalgamates. And even if Betty DID say she wanted Asriel's soul, you still didn't know what she wanted it for tho- it's not your fault…"
"but you were only a child. a child that had been hurt so badly that you felt like you had to repay monsterkind just for showing you some kindness. a-and i know t-that it isn't my fault, b-but at the same t-time, i f-feel like it was."
"But still- there's only so much a monster can do. Even a Judge. And. I guess the same goes for me. It's okay.." Chara says, continuing to mentally hug Sans.
"that's true. heh, i guess it's like i said before, we're both pretty messed up." Sans says quietly, accepting the mental hugs.
"Haha yeah, I guess that's why we kinda make a good team though, in a way. I mean, we can understand each other since we've both probably done and gone through stuff we didn't like or aren't proud of, sorta."
"yeah, that's true." Sans replied, sounding a little calmer as he mentally hugs Chara.
"And… although I guess technically I'm semi doing the same thing Betty did, but know I'd never do anything to hurt you in any way unlike her. Okay? I mean- unless...ya know. If we were dying or something and I had no choice. Heh. And I also wanna give you that same permission too, and if for whatever reason you needed to use my determination and we're in a life or death situation, feel free to just take it or whatever, if there's absolutely no choice, okay? We're a team." Chara informed, still mentally hugging Sans in a comforting, friendly kinda way.
"chara, you're nothing like that thing. you wanted to save me, not hurt and exploit me. and i am grateful that you did save me, and i know that you would never hurt me unless you had no choice. and i promise that i won't hurt you unless i have no choice, okay?" Sans replied, still accepting the mental hugs.
"Okay," Chara smiled. "I just wanted to be sure, I know sometimes, especially in the middle of a breakdown or a panic attack it can be hard to tell the difference. And, even as much as I'd love to know more about you, I wanna do it through love, trust and consent and as friends. Not by the literal invading of the mind or anything."
"yeah, i know." Sans replied quietly, seeming very tired.
"Okay." Chara told him, then paused. "How're you feeling?" He asked, still sounding worried.
"...m'feeling a bit better. even just having you here and knowing that you at least somewhat understand is nice."
"Well, I'm glad, you do feel like you're doing slightly better now than earlier. I just-... wish I could go into your dreams somehow and kick the butt of that weird fusion for terrifying you so much. Defend you even in your dreams ya know? There's times I wished Asriel could, in my nightmares. Even if he couldn't do much, it's comforting knowing you're not all alone when nightmares happen, ya know?" Chara said, gently mentally rubbing Sans back. "I wish I could help you more."
"'is fine." Sans mumbled in response. "you're already doing as much as you can."
"But, I wanna do more. I'm the future of Humans and Monsters after all, and now your Ambassador, even if I don't entirely know how to do that still. But… I don't want you or anyone to have to suffer alone. I just-" Suddenly, an idea came to Chara's mind. "Wait, since we share the same body, shouldn't I feel rested if like- maybe you slept? Or vice versa? Maybe- I can stay awake while you sleep and watch over you and your SOUL. Then, I can like- wake you if I feel a disturbance or something or...since...I can kinda read your thoughts, what if I could go into your dreams and protect you when you start dreaming? If you're okay with it that is. I mean, it's worth a shot anyways." Chara suggested, sounding like this could work. "Maybe you sleeping and me being awake too would like- cancel out the other and still feel like we rested. I don't know. But- I wanna help."
"Or, maybe we can just tire you out hella, so you'd be too exhausted to even dream at all, and sleep deeper and avoid your nightmares altogether. If you don't want me going into your dreams. It's entirely up to you, and I'll respect whatever you think is best. Okay?"
"maybe. sounds like it's worth a shot. but, i'm not sure if i'm comfortable with you going into my dreams. it's not you, i'm just worried about what it might...feel like." Sans replied, shivering.
"Heh, I kinda am too. I guess it'll be like when I saw your memories of your nightmare? But...I can interact in it?" Chara wondered, "but, again. It's up to you. I just really do wanna help you out. I mean, if all your nightmares are as intense as that one- jeez… it's no wonder Papyrus hardly sleeps. And thinks sleeping 8 hours is weird and too long. haha"
"eh, not all of my nightmares are this bad and i don't always have them. sometimes i even have quite nice dreams. but, yeah, they can get pretty bad."
"Oh.." Chara pouted, "well at least you do still get nice dreams every now and then." Chara said, trying to look at the positives, the way Paps would.
"heh, yeah. and there's the dreams that are just really weird."
"Oh? Like what?" Chara teased a little, trying to lighten the mood. "Once I dreamed Asriel's ears turned into pancakes. And apparently I sleepwalked over to him and tried eating them. That one was weird, I had fur in my mouth for an entire week after that and it sucked."
Sans chuckled quietly at this before replying. "well, one time i had a dream that another version of me was dueling a random human with a cucumber to win my hand in marriage. that one was really weird."
"What the heck?" Chara laughed trying to picture that. "That one's cute tho. And weird but adorable haha"
"yeah, it was, heheh." Sans replied, smiling internally as he remembers the dream. "and don't worry, i didn't end up having to marry some random human instead of the other me who i was in love with for some reason."
"Oh? Aww~" Chara smiled too."Thats sweet~"
"yeah, it was both weird and sweet." Sans replied quietly, still seeming very tired but also still somewhat reluctant to sleep.
"Haha yeah.. So...what do you think? I mean- which idea did you like more?"
Sans was quiet as he thought for a bit, then replied. "i think that i would like you to just try and wake me up and maybe comfort me if you sense that i'm having a nightmare, since like i said before, i really don't know what having you suddenly come into my dreams would feel like and it could just make things worse." He said quietly
"Alright," Chara agreed. "Sounds like a plan. D'you wanna go back inside? The Sun'll be out soon."
"well, i would prefer to stay out here, but i know that i should at least try and get more sleep before morning." Sans replied quietly.
"Let's bring the others inside first, you can sleep, and I'll take over for now okay? Looks like Azzy passed out as well." Chara said, smiling a bit as he turned his one red eye light towards the younger goat monster who had really fallen asleep, his head resting on Charans shoulder.
"that sounds like a good idea." Sans said quietly, smiling as well when he saw his father and brother snuggled up together.
Chara smiled too, also seeing Pappy and Gaster snuggling. "So cute~ I almost feel bad for this." Chara began to stand, careful to hold Azzys head, before gathering the little goat monster into his arms, trying to be careful not to wake him up.