It was clear that the world outside the door was far different than the Ruins. Cold winds rushed to them as soon as the door was opened, causing Wirt to try and bundle closer into his cloak. A blanket of snow covered the land and ended just at the edge of the door.
"Hooray! Snow day!" said Greg as he bounded towards the snow.
Wirt sighed and tried his best to ignore his brother. Leave it to Greg to forget they just had to fight the only friendly face they've met down here.
Greg did not fight back, actually. Once Toriel saw that Greg wouldn't fight back, she turned her attention to Wirt. Once Greg convinced Wirt not to fight back, she ended the fight. She had allowed them to leave, and asked that they try not to contact her again. That didn't change the fact that Greg had tried to call her every five seconds as they left the Ruins.
The sounds of snapping branches behind him shook Wirt out of his thoughts.
"Greg, come on, we're leaving," said Wirt.
"I know!" said Greg, from right in front of him.
Wirt's head snapped from Greg to behind him again. No one was there.
"Wow, that was a pretty big branch," said Greg. "Someone really strong must have snapped it."
Wirt pulled Greg up. Greg scrambled to grab his frog.
"Come on Greg, we're getting out of here as soon as possible."
Whether he liked it or not, Greg was his responsibility, and Wirt was going to make sure he got home safe.
"Kay," said Greg. "Are you sure we can't go talk to the guy following us first?"
Wirt started to run. He only slowed down as they reached a large gate.
"Hello, humans. Two of you, huh?"
"Hiya mister!" Greg squirmed under Wirt's arm as he put down the frog and held out his hand.
"hey kid. sorry, no handshakes today. left my whoopee cushions back at my checkpoint."
"Whoopee!"
Wirt spun around. Behind him was a skeleton. It was not a particularly scary skeleton, Wirt realized. He was short and round, wearing a hodgepodge of clothing that put what Wirt was wearing to shame. His teeth were stretched into a wide grin that hardly moved as he spoke.
"My name's Greg, and this is Wirt, and this is my frog Alexander Hamilton, but I'm thinking of changing it," said Greg.
"the name's sans, nice to meet ya," said sans. "now, we were on the lookout for humans, so you better—"
"SANS!"
"already?" sans asked. "okay, go ahead and go through that gate. i'll think of…something."
"You'll think of something?" Wirt asked.
"yeah, relax. i have some nice lamps you can hide behind."
The gate bars weren't big enough to block the four of them out. Without any other choice, Wirt ran through them.
There was a lamp out there. And even more surprisingly, it was human shaped. Not Wirt shaped, it was too short for that. Not Greg shaped, it was too thin for that.
sans muttered under his breath before he turned back to the others. "alright, maybe you can hide in my checkpoint?"
Wirt didn't even get the chance. Before he could move, something was behind him.
"sup bro?" sans asked.
"YOU KNOW WHAT'S SUP BROTHER!" The newcomer snapped. "YOU STILL HAVEN'T RECALIBRATED YOUR PUZ—"
The newcomer's eyes fell onto the three and he jumped back.
It was another skeleton. Much taller and angled than sans was, yet Wirt still didn't feel bone-chilling terror at the sight of him. He was dressed in some strange armor, topped with an orange scarf that hovered behind him like cape.
"SANS!" The newcomer snapped. "ARE THOSE HUMANS?"
"uh…i think that's a froggit, actually."
The frog croaked.
"I'm a human!" Greg spoke up. "My name's Greg and that's Wirt and that's my frog Thomas Jefferson but I'm thinking of changing it—"
"SANS! YOU FINALLY CAUGHT A HUMAN! AND TWO OF THEM! I'M SO PROUD OF YOU!" The newcomer said.
"uh…sure…"
The newcomer cleared his throat. Wirt wondered if he had one. "ATTENTION, HUMANS! YOU SHALL NOT PASS THIS AREA! I, THE GREAT PAPYRUS, WILL STOP YOU! I WILL THEN CAPTURE YOU! YOU WILL BE DELIVERED TO THE CAPITAL! AFTER THAT! I'M NOT SURE WHAT HAPPENS! IN ANY CASE, CONTINUE…ONLY IF YOU DARE! NYEH HEH HEH!"
They reached the next town by sunset. It was a tiny thing that is more farmland than houses, but that was not what intrigued Frisk.
There were skeleton monsters. Hundreds of them, really, disguised in costumes of pumpkin held together by straw. Frisk recognized them by the occasional gap that reveals bone, but more by their speech patterns.
They called for help, and were passed from one skeleton to the next until they reach the Pottsville Town City Commissioner, the biggest and meanest-looking of the group. He took a long look at Frisk, a longer look at the Cat, and welcomed them both to the party.
They also found the bluebird again. She kept her distance from the whole thing until Frisk invited her over. Even then, she was noticeably uncomfortable.
"Why are you even here? These guys are giving me the creeps," said the bluebird.
Frisk shrugged.
Their a bit weird, but their really nice! They add in the notebook and show to her.
The bluebird made a face.
"Oh. You can't talk, huh."
There was a hint of disappointment in her tone, but Frisk is used to it, so they shrugged.
"I assure you, I am more than capable of speaking for the both of us," said the Cat. There was a hint of something they did not recognize in his tone.
"Listen," said the bluebird. "You're still lost, right? I'm on my way to find Adelaide, the Good Witch of the Pasture. Maybe you can come with me, and maybe she could help you out too?"
The Cat made a noise as he starts to clean behind his ears dismissively.
"Forgive me for not being entirely trusting of women who say they have magic," said the Cat.
Maybe she can help us find beast, Frisk wrote down and showed to the both of them.
"What, you're looking for that thing?" The bluebird asked.
Think he's lost, like us, Frisk wrote.
The bluebird was silent for a minute.
"Well, you're free to follow me, if you want," she said quietly.
Great! Frisk wrote. My name's Frisk, and the Cat doesn't really have a name. What's your name?
"Beatrice."
The Snowdin Forest turned out to be easily navigable, even with the two skeletons trying to capture them. Greg handled the monsters, un-decorating the Gryphon and pretending to laugh at Snowdrake's jokes.
Or maybe that was legitimate laughter. There were too many puns in the Underground for Wirt's taste.
Wirt, meanwhile, worked on the puzzles. It was a generosity to call them puzzles, really. He was pretty sure the hardest one was the junior jumble. With puzzles like that, and with the fact that sans was never too far behind in case they needed some warmer clothes or help running away from the Jerry, it was hard to think of the skeleton brothers as anything but distractions.
Except for the fact that they were trying to kidnap them.
Toriel had tried to kidnap them, in a way. The ones that did not fight them would kidnap them in the end.
Wirt really hated the Underground.
Despite his bitter feelings, he was rather surprised to see Snowdin Town. It was a pleasant-looking town, with small buildings and Christmas decorations that lit the narrow streets. It looked too nice for a place in the Underground.
There was an inn. He didn't quite know how time passed in the Underground, but it had been a long time since they had slept. The Snowed Inn—
Wirt rolled his eyes. It would have to do.
"Come on, Greg," said Wirt. "We'll stay here for the night and think about what to do in the morning."
"It's noon," said Greg, but he still followed Wirt in. He was asleep before he was.
Frisk, on a general principle, did not like schools. They had too many bad memories of school, from the students that teased them to the teachers that let them get away with it. But when they saw the schoolhouse, and figured out that it was surprisingly easy to get in, they decided it was not a bad place to stay for the night. The Cat and Beatrice had not been happy about it, but they learned to deal with it when Ms. Langtree served the lunch meal.
Potatoes and molasses healed a surprising amount.
Animal monsters made up most of the student population. hey are more animal-like than the animal monsters in the Underground, the only thing that makes them look different from just an animal being their clothes.
They were silent when they spoke. Frisk didn't mind; so are they. Ms. Langtree didn't mind; she can teach and go on about without interruption.
When they do speak, it is with music. The music is not perfect, as inexperienced paws and claws play instruments that were not designed for them. But when they perform together it is a celebration. Even Beatrice could enjoy it. It does not take much work for Frisk to show them that everyone would recognize it.
They never figured out what happened to the gorilla monster that was running around, or that no good two-timing Jimmy. They school stays open.
Greg woke up before Wirt. This was not hard, considering they were only asleep for about an hour. The bunny lady made a point of paying him back for the room considering they barely used it. Greg spent the money on Nice Cream across the street.
"Come on, Lucinda," said Greg to the frog, but mostly to himself. He would have to find a better name for the frog later. "Let's go find Papyrus."
The frog croaked in support.
It was not hard to find Papyrus. He was right at the end of the town, as the road becomes covered in fog. He was not hard to find, but he was hard to see. Greg wondered if that was intentional.
"HUMAN," Papyrus took in a deep breath before he continued. "ALLOW ME TO TELL YOU ABOUT SOME COMPELX FEELINGS. FEELINGS LIKE…THE JOY OF FINDING ANOTHER PASTA LOVER. THE ADMIRATION FOR ANOTHER'S PUZZLE SOLVING SKILLS. THE DESIRE TO HAVE A COOL, SMART PERSON THINK YOU ARE COOL. THESE FELLINGS…THEY MUST BE WHAT YOU ARE FEELING RIGHT NOW."
"You're not wrong!" said Greg. And, because that was the same way Wirt talked about Sara, "Does that mean you wanna go on a date with me?"
"WHAT!? F-FLIRTING?! SO YOU FINALLY REVEAL YOUR ULTIMATE FEELINGS! WELL, I AM A SKELETON WITH VERY HIGH STANDARDS!"
"Well, I think Lucinda and I could make spaghetti if we really tried," said Greg. The frog ribbited in agreement.
"OH NO! YOU'RE MEETING ALL OF MY STANDARDS! L-LET'S DATE LATER! AFTER I CAPTURE YOU!"
The fight began.
It was easy to dodge Papyrus' attacks. Very easy. Most times, Greg did not have to try. However, he quickly ran out of things he could do to escalate the battle. He would have to rely on his mercy.
Papyrus noticed that.
"SO, YOU WON'T FIGHT BACK?" Papyrus asked. "THEN LET'S SEE IF YOU CAN'T HANDLE MY FABLED BLUE ATTACK!"
The Blue Attack also was not hard to dodge. Greg learned from the cute Doggo with the bad eyesight how to remember blue stopsigns, and that was all Papyrus is throwing at him. He didn't even have to move.
Until his Soul sank to the ground.
"YOU'RE BLUE NOW. THAT'S MY ATTACK. NYEH HEH HEH!"
When Wirt woke up, he couldn't find Greg. It was only about ten minutes after Greg had left, but he did not realize that at the time. He rushed out of the inn, ignoring whatever the bunny monster was saying about payment. He ran through the streets of Snowdin wildly, trying to look for any sign of Greg…
And he found him casually leaving a rather large shed, the frog in the kettle he used for a hat.
"Greg, where were you?"
"I lost against Papyrus, so he kidnapped me," said Greg. "But he made the bars too big and he forgot to lock the door so I broke out. I'm a jailbird now, Wirt!"
Wirt wasn't sure if he should feel relieved or annoyed. He settled for focusing on the one thing he knows: Papyrus was going to capture them. He may not be very effective at it, but he could.
"Alright, fine. I'll fight him."
Wirt didn't realize he was wandering so deep into the fog it was already too late. He was ready to turn around when he saw a figure in front of him.
"HELLO BIGGER HUMAN! ARE YOU HERE TO FIGHT ME TOO?"
"You bet!" Greg said. "He's way stronger than I am!"
"WHAT?! SMALLER HUMAN?! YOU BROKE OUT OF MY PRISON?!" Papyrus asked. "NEVER MIND! LET ME PROVE TO YOU JUST HOW STRONG AND POPULAR I AM!"
Papyrus blocks the path.
"Try flirting with him, Wirt!" Greg said.
"YOU TOO?! WHY DO HUMANS FLIRT SO MUCH?!"
"No, I don't—" Wirt starts.
WELL, I SUPOSE IT IS VERY PROBABLE THAT THE GREAT PAPYRUS HAS MANY ADMIRERS! BUT LET'S DATE LATER! AFTER I KIDNAP YOU!"
Wirt felt a sinking feeling in his chest. His Soul dropped to the ground.
"YOU'RE BLUE NOW. THAT'S MY ATTACK! NYEH HEH HEH!"
Wirt willed himself to pull his Soul off the ground. The next wave of bone attacks started up. A few collided into Wirt's side before he could adequately dodge them.
"Jump, Wirt, jump!" said Greg from the sidelines.
Wirt jumped. His Soul followed him. He landed just as a slow moving bone crossed under his feet.
"HMM…I WONDER WHAT I SHOULD WEAR…" said Papyrus. "THE DATING RULEBOOK DOES EMPHASIZE THE IMPORTANCE OF CLOTHING…"
Another wave on bone attacks rushed towards Wirt. He jumped over it.
"DO I HAVE ANY MTT ANIME POWDER BACK AT HOME I CAN RUB BEHIND MY EARS? DO I HAVE EARS?"
"Hey Papyrus!" Wirt said. "You still wanna go on that date? Because I imagine I can't go if you kidnap me!"
"I DO SEE THAT, HUMAN!" said Papyrus. "BUT IMAGINE HOW MUCH MY POPULARITY WILL SKYROCKET IF I DO CAPTURE YOU! UNDYNE WILL BE REALLY PROUD OF ME! THE KING WILL TRIM A HEDGE IN THE SHAPE OF MY SMILE! MY BROTHER WILL….WELL, HE WON'T CHANGE THAT MUCH."
Wirt only caught some of that. More bones launched themselves towards him with every thought.
"I WILL HAVE MANY ADMIRERS! BUT…WILL ANYONE LIKE ME AS MUCH AS YOU DO?"
"I will!" said Greg.
Bones as tall as Wirt filled the area. Wirt jumped, and found himself sailing in the air. He soared over them, and landed back in the snow. His Soul landed with a thud.
"I like you too, Papyrus," said Wirt. "So maybe we can just forget about this human capturing nonsense and go on a date?"
Papyrus hesitated. He looked down at the ground as he weighed his options.
"SORRY HUMAN…BUT SURRENDER OR FACE MY SPECIAL ATTACK!"
Papyrus stepped back as he unveiled his attack.
The dog looked back up at him.
"WHAT THE HECK! THAT'S MY SPECIAL ATTACK!"
Papyrus threw a few of the smaller bones towards the dog in annoyance. It scampered off, special attack in mouth and tail wagging wildly.
"Wirt! Wirt, Wirt!" said Greg. "Here, eat one of these, it'll make you feel better!"
Greg ran out into the battlefield and took something out of his teapot hat. Wirt only had a second to really look at it. It looked like some kind of cinnamon roll, carefully pressed into the shape of a rabbit.
"SIGH…HERE'S AN ABSOLUTELY NORMAL ATTACK."
More bones emerged from the ground, forming a forest around them. Wirt shoved the cinnamon bunny in his mouth, grabbed a hold of Greg, and jumped.
There was a horse monster. His name is Fred. He thinks he's a lot meaner than he actually is. He does have a tendency to steal, however.
There were other humans. Frisk was less interested in them. They were very interested in Frisk though. There were the customers of the tavern, who scrambled to label Frisk as something they weren't. They settled on the young pilgrim, and Frisk decides to keep it because it does not assume what gender they are. There's Mr. Quincy and Miss Margueritte and Frisk is disappointed to find out that they aren't ghost monsters. They send Frisk away with some gold coins and some tea. The tea feels familiar for reasons that Frisk can't quite place.
There were frog monsters. They are far better dressed than the Froggits of the Ruins. Frisk, the Cat, and Beatrice hop aboard their ship and are carried to the pasture. The band was nice.
They saw the Woodsman once more. They don't know if the Woodsman saw them, however. He seemed very distracted.
None of them, however, seem to know if they are monsters. If they did slow down enough to see what Frisk was saying, they would usually interpret monster to mean a very bad thing, get offended, and wouldn't wait for Frisk to explain what they meant. It was mostly the older not-quite-monsters who did this.
"I don't know what you expect," said the Cat while they were on the boat. "If you asked if I were a monster I wouldn't have an answer for you."
Frisk asked if the Cat was a monster. The Cat gave Frisk a lazy glare but did not answer.
Frisk asked if Beatrice were a monster.
"What?" Beatrice was distracted when they asked. She had been distracted the entire boat ride. "No, I….I used to be human you know."
Frisk hadn't. They turned their head to the side, to indicate how they want to hear more.
"Well, that's why I'm going to Adelaide's. Not much else to say about it," said Beatrice. "Listen, kid…are you sure you can't just leave this Beast business behind you and try and find your way home on your own?"
Frisk tried to answer. They try to write down that they don't know where home is to begin with, and they need to get back to the Underground. They try to write that if the Beast really is a monster, or if there are any monsters in this place at all, they could help.
But Beatrice notices that they're writing stuff down and answers before they can even finish a word.
"Great, then we're skipping Adelaide's, maybe we can go back to Pottsfield, you like skeletons, right?"
She flew closer in to the crowd before they could answer back. The Cat gave Beatrice a steady glare, but did not say anything.
"Wow," said Greg. "Nice shortcut."
"thanks."
The area where sans had taken him looked like a place that his dad had said he shouldn't go into. However, it was so cozy and warm that Greg not think of a reason why he couldn't go in. Even the monsters looked friendly. Even the man on fire at the front looked friendly.
sans guided him up to the bar in the front. He had to help pull him up on the high barstool.
"what sounds good, bucko?"
"Hmm...potatoes!"
"we got fries, kid."
"That'll do!"
"you heard it grillbz. double order of fry."
The bartender gave as steady a glare as one without a face could give towards sans, but left to the kitchen. The three sat in silence. Even Ross Valory the frog was silent.
"so kid. been meaning to ask you something," said sans.
The atmosphere suddenly grew very heavy. Ross Valory ribbited, but with something Greg didn't understand.
But he liked sans, so he decided to give him the benefit of the doubt. "What's up?"
"well, there's been something i'm worried about," said sans. "Papyrus told me something interesting the other day. when no one's around, a talking flower likes to show up and talk to him. offer him things; flattery, advice…predictions. think someone might be using one of them echo flowers in the Waterfall to play a trick on him. and if i'm being real honest…i think it might be a human."
Greg thought hard, and hummed as he did.
"Well, it can't be either of us, because we just got here," said Greg. "Were there any other humans in the Underground before us?"
sans sighed before he answered.
He grabbed the ketchup bottle off of the bar and drank it whole. Greg always wanted to do that. But Dad said that there was too much sugar in ketchup and it didn't taste sweet anyway.
"Well, I don't know about any Echo Flowers, but I'll keep an eye out for that one Golden Flower that likes to play pranks on people," said Greg. "Thanks for the eats, sans."
Sans was silent when Greg walked away. The frog croaked and tugged on his overalls. Greg looked behind him just in time to see the absolutely bewildered expression on sans' face.
Somehow, he didn't find that funny.