Disclaimer: I own nothing

Chapter 25

BPOV

I don't know where the sudden boldness had come from but I wanted nothing more than to feel Edward-all of him-all over me. His words had unleashed something in me and I couldn't stand the small distance between us. So I said it-I needed to tell him to stop playing it safe. I knew we were mates-I knew how the others acted and felt around each other and wanted that for myself with him. Even as a human, I had been drawn to him. As a vampire, the pull was beyond my control.

I couldn't have prepared myself for Edward letting himself go. His eyes gleamed as he looked over my body before catching my mouth with his own once more. While I could, quite literally, continued kissing Edward forever, I knew it wasn't enough. I'd felt the passion for him while hunting, though I had suppressed it, but I let myself feel everything now. His hands were in my hair, roving over my back, cupping my backside as he continued to kiss me thoroughly. I moaned as he slipped his tongue inside my mouth, causing him to grip me tighter. Some need had begun building low in my core, a foreign but very welcome feeling that I was eager to explore. My hands feeling the perfect hardness of his chest, his arms, and lower towards his abdomen. I paused as my fingers hit the fabric of his waistband as Edward pulled away from me. He grabbed my wrists, halting my progress further.

"I am not doing this in the middle of the forest," he said with mirth in his slightly dazed eyes.

I decided to play dumb to see what exactly he was referring to. "Doing what?" I looked up at him with my best doe eyes.

His eyes crinkled in the corners as he gave me a crooked grin. He took my hand and started running again, this time I could tell we were headed back towards town. I was disappointed we had stopped but my belly curled with anticipation as to where we were going. Scenting my family, I realized we were coming upon the house. I pulled us to a halt.

"Nope. No way." I stated, pulling my hand from his, firmly placing both hands on my hips.

He looked back at me with confusion.

"There's no way I can be around anyone right now." I whined. I thought I was above begging, but with the way I was feeling right now, I didn't know if I would be able to control myself enough to stop touching him and focus on interacting appropriately with others around.

"Alice took care of that. They won't bother us. She has them all away for the weekend." He stated, with a smug look on his face.

My face must have slipped into one of pure shock before I recognized the gift she had given us.

"Remind me to get her a really good Christmas present!"

Edward smiled wide as he grabbed my hand again, resuming our progress towards the house.

Once inside, my nerves kicked in. He had dropped my hand as we entered to start a fire. Not that we needed heat, but I am guessing he was looking for something to do so we didn't walk in and start ripping each other's clothes off. In that moment, away from his body and scent, I was able to think about the fact that I had zero experience with anyone in this department. I had never even been kissed before today. The desire that had been coursing through my body moments ago was slowly replaced with dread. What if I wasn't good at this? I didn't know what I was doing? What is I did something wrong and Edward realized he didn't want me after all. Would he reject me again. I made an excuse aloud to him that I wanted to freshen up and ran upstairs, easily finding the bathroom.

I shut the door quickly, my back closing it before sliding down the length of the door before my head rested on my knees. If I were human, I would have been hyperventilating. It also didn't help that Alice had seen what we were doing and evacuated the whole family out so Edward could have his way with me. How embarrassing! Considering the things I had seen, heard and...smelled, I shouldn't feel any shame in wanting what I did, but it was natural for me to be a private person. For the whole family to know felt wrong.

I shook my head and stood up slowly, making my way over to the walk in shower and turning the water to the hottest setting it would go. Maybe I needed a breather. While I didn't actually need a shower, it had always calmed me as a human, and it seemed to do the same for me as a vampire. I needed whatever calm I could get right now.

I stepped in front of the mirror, taking off my clothes. I had admired my body since becoming a vampire but never in a sexual way. What would Edward see when he looked at me? Would I still be attractive to him? I supposed I was beautiful in the way that all vampires were beautiful, but would I be special to him? My breasts had grown, my waist had narrowed slightly, my butt and hips a bit bigger and I had gained some toning in my muscles. This was the best version of myself that the venom could afford. Would it be good enough?

Once I was fully nude, I stepped into the shower. The instant the water hit my body, I let out a deep sigh, feeling some tension release. What would have been too hot for me before simply felt warm and pleasant. I was once again lost in my thoughts when I heard a gently knock on the door.

Edward called to me from the other side of the door, asking if I was alright.

My belly swooped hearing his voice. I wasn't sure if it was nerves or desire, but I felt it nonetheless. Distracted by the sensation, I didn't respond immediately. He must have been worried because he opened the door and entered the room. Luckily, with how hot the shower was, the room was filled with steam, but with out excellent vampire vision, steam was easy to see through. My eyes shot to him, covering myself (unsuccessfully) to avoid him seeing me naked.

Edward was a gentleman, of course, and wasn't looking in my direction but was staring quite pointedly at the floor.

"Bella, are you okay?" he asked again.

I cleared my throat, "Yeah, I'm fine. I just needed a minute to...relax or calm down.."

He smiled, still looking at the floor. "Okay-sorry to come in here. When you didn't answer I got nervous."

I laughed. "I'm a vampire, Edward. What could have possibly happened to me in a bathroom?"

He looked up at me then, chuckling along with me, but stopped when he locked eyes with me.

I was like a deer in headlights. He was fully clothed, but the look on his face had shifted from mirthful to predatory. I slowly dropped my arms that had been shielding myself, the desire taking over again now that he was in my sight, his scent mixing powerfully among the steam. His eyebrows raised infinitesimally before he took a step closer, groaning my name, before covering his face with his hands.

I shifted over, feeling brave again. "Do you want to join me?"

He moved his hands, dragging them through his hair, looking at me with a pained expression.

I cocked my head, "What?"

"You're killing me. You look so beautiful standing there under the water. So perfect. I want nothing more than to come in there with you. I just don't know what the right thing to do is", he admitted.

I smiled, feeling a phantom blush appear on my cheeks, and beckoned him with an outstretched arm. "Stop thinking so much. Let's just be together-there is no right or wrong here, Edward."

He nodded but still seemed torn. I decided it might be too much for him to decide with my eyes on him, so I turned around and busied myself with washing. I knew if I were in his position, I would be nervous to undress for the first time. With my back turned, maybe it would be easier. In a heartbeat, I felt the air shift and the magnetic pull that was Edward at my back.

His voice was low and gravelly as he pulled my hair to the side. "Let me wash your hair?"

I handed him the bottle, smiling at him over my shoulder. I could hear him squeeze shampoo onto his hand before gently massaging it through my hair. I sighed at the feel of his fingers kneading my head. I nearly dropped my head back onto him-it felt so good. I might have been purring.

I could hear Edward's quiet chuckle behind me as he leaned forward, "I love hearing you make those sounds".

My eyes shuttered in response.

"Turn around", he directed. I spun to face him, closing my eyes as he pushed me back slightly until I was under the spray of the water. He began rinsing my hair, stepping closer to my body until we were within an inch of each other. If I leaned forward slightly, I would feel his naked body against me. Before I got the courage to do so, he pulled me forward again. I wiped the water from my eyes, making sure not to let my eyes dip to his naked body like I wanted to.

"Your turn" I said instead of ogling. He smiled and nodded. He handed me the shampoo and let me work the liquid through his hair, closing his eyes just as I had done.

I had dreamed of touching his hair, even when I was a human. The copper shade, so unsual, and the riotous mess that it typically was always called to me.

"You have no idea how long I've wanted my fingers in your hair," I admitted openly.

He grinned in response before asking, "Really?"

"Mhmm. Though I never thought the first time touching it would be in the shower, washing it."

He coughed out a laugh, peeking an eye open at me and nodding before closing his eye again.

My hands dropped to his broad shoulders, guiding him to swap places with me so he would be under the water. He complied, keeping his eyes closed the entire time. I knew I should have been focusing in rinsing his hair, but with his eyes closed, I decided to take a peek at him and was stunned by the perfection of his naked body. I shouldn't have been surprised, given my attraction to him with clothes on, but seeing him in front of me like this made my heart swell and my desire bloom. I had to rub my thighs together to alleviate the tingling that had started between my legs.

When I finally dragged my eyes back up to Edward's face, I was startled to see him looking back at me with water cascading over his face. He just smirked at me, shaking his head and then washed the shampoo from his head.

Damn...I had been caught after all. I looked away, wrapped my arms around my chest and began biting my lip. A nervous habit I must have retained from my humanity. I felt guilty for peeking but also so eager to touch him and feel him that I didn't really know what to do.

Edward stepped towards me, one hand pulling my bottom lip away from my teeth, the other brushing my hands away from my chest. He smiled cheekily before saying, "its only fair that I get to look at you too". I couldn't meet his gaze as I sucked on my cheek, trying not to smile.

He was so close that my hairs were standing on end from his proximity. He brushed the back of his hand against my collarbone.

"Can I please touch you, love?"

My stomach dropped at the term. I looked into his eyes while furiously nodding my head in assent.

I swear the air stopped moving as his hand slowly drifted towards the top swell of my breast before his knuckle grazed my nipple. I involuntarily arched against the touch, earned a growl from Edward. He lifted his other hand and used both to gently cup both breasts, flicking his thumbs against my tight peaks. I made a sound between a moan and a sigh, letting my eyes shut, enjoying the sensation of his hands on me.

"Bella", his voice was strained, "You are so perfect."

His hands lingered there for a moment longer before moving down, tracing the arc of my ribs, sliding down the dip of my waist and the flare of my hips before settling on my hipbones. He pulled me into him and ran his rose up my neck before inhaling deeply right below my ear. I shuddered at the feeling of his attentions on my neck and the feel of his arousal against my belly. He had been hard when I looked at him under the water-clearly as affected by our actions as I was. But feeling him against me was entirely different. I pulled my head back to see his face as I asked him the same question he had asked me moments before.

He nodded as one of his hands left my waist to grip my wrist and guide me down to his hard, flat stomach. I laid my palm flat against him, rubbing against his abs. His skin was smooth, but I could feel all his defined muscles. I left my fingers trace the sharp V leading down towards the trail of hair leading below. I touched his penis delicately, not knowing exactly what to do when he grabbed my hand again, wrapping my hand around him. He felt big and hard in my hand, yet the skin was soft. I squeezed once before moving my hair down the entire length of him.

"God, Bella", he breathed. His forehead fell against mine, the water from the shower pounding against his back. "I want you so badly. Can you feel how much I want you?"

I could only nod in agreement, too lost in my exploration of his body. Suddenly, I was being pushed against the wall of the shower, Edward's lips melding with my own as he ground into my waist, my hand still on him. His hands gripped my ass and moved down towards the back of my thighs before he lifted me up. My legs automatically wrapped around him, my hand on his cock right against me, my other arm wrapping around his neck for stability.

"Bed?" he asked against my mouth between kisses.

I took a deep breath, shuddering breath before responding yes.