Nameless: After days and days of bugging me about it...here is a new chapter! Haha. After our hours of conversation, that's all I have to say right now. Oh...and...I stopped watching OW and doing Stats...just to update! Er...is it bad I was watching TV and doing Stats at the same time?
Kirei: Do not choke! I do not offer insurance! Lol.
Eva: Thank you! It was my fav to write.
Lessthan13: -points to review insurance disclaimer on my profile- Now, I was forced to put up another disclaimer bc all of my reviewer seemed to be dying!
JB: Well...Maybe this chapt will make things slightly better. Not too much physical damage...but eh.
KJ: You gotta admit...it wouldn't have been as intense if they'd kissed 10 chapts ago.
Bigblusky: Haha. Remy kicked his ass and you're all still cheering her on to beat him up a little more. Oh my. She's badass, but she isn't a ninja! xDDD
iBrit: Thank you very very much. I'm glad you're enjoying it.
Enigmatic: Well...I guess speechlessness is better than my dying reviewers! Heh.
Shan: Glad you liked it!
Angel's: Aha. The Russian Roulette scene was inspired by Lady Gaga's line, "Russian Roulette is not the same without a gun." I guess listening to her while typing is not useless after all!
Roronoa: Remy is secretly a ninja. Shhhh. Hahaha. Thirteen did not call Kutner nor Taub, btw. She didn't get the chance.
Anonymous: Thank you so so so much!
Melissa: Aw. I hope that you're feeling much much better by now! Totally cute story about your dog by the way! It made me giggle. My dog is a wimp too. Haha. She's terrified of mice and waterbugs.
Dino: Thank you so much! Glad you're enjoying it!
Final: Glad I was able to get the emotion across.
YDPP: There's always struggles and setbacks with me, huh? -wink-
WrongObsession: I should totally be doing Stats right now. I loved how you sent me the chapt as soon as I was sent my hw. That's totally how my life works...and then we see what my real priorities end up being. xD
Twampy: People are doing nursery rhymes outside. Sorry. I needed to state that...and they started doing them right when I started replying to you. It's creeping me out a bit. Haha. Anyway! Thanks for reviewing! I'm glad you liked it!
Setyourself: -points to review insurance on profile- I need to post a big, bright sign with a heart with a happy-face on it, don't I?! Haha.
Nijram: I'm glad you liked it!
Dida: Ah...the joys of deflecting. No need to be afraid to review if I scare you or something. Lol. I'm quite harmless...er...to most people. I often assault Plush Panda...but I'm harmless other than that! xDDD I'm glad I made it seem real. I agonized over that chapter forever. Don't we all need to be hospitalized in mental institutions? Haha.
Amazon: It hit me we haven't talked in awhile. Huh. That's probably my fault somehow. Sowwy! Anyway. Please breathe. Oxygen is important!
Ina: Pun intended? I killed a lot of reviewers, apparently! Why do my chapts make ppl think of weird songs? Haha.
Ilessthree: Thank you so much! Glad you liked it!
Ilive: 3 times? Haha. That's a lot. I read it so many times while editing it that I love it to pieces but never want to look at it again...which made it a pain to write this chapt!
Lessthan13: You're back! Haha. I should scroll up and add this to the last review...but...I'm lazy. Don't feel bad; I ditched Stats to update this chapt. While writing this...I realized I'd die to see the kiss I wrote on TV. Is it sad that I like my own chapt so much I'd die to see it on TV? Batman and a gun prolly wouldn't have ended well. And added disclaimer!
Murmurs: Thank you so much! Glad you liked it!
More: Thank you so much. You gotta admit...it wouldn't have been the same if they had kissed sooner!
JB: I know, I know. I'm sorry! Dx
Some important things!
1. I'm on a temporary hiatus. I just got back to school...I'm trying to adjust. It isn't easy. My schedule is crazy, my Stats class is very hard...so yeah. I realize I needed to give you something and Remy's POV of the last chapt is important...so here is this chapt. I will try to update soon...but no promises.
2. This story is not close to being over! I may be slow, but you'll probably be bombarded with chapts come break...if I don't have homework. I still have a lot in my head for this story. It will be M rated and if it took me 24 chapts to get to a kiss...just imagine how long you'll be waiting for sex.
3. I just feel like I must say...y'all can feel real fear if the characters lives are in danger. No one in this story is guaranteed life except Batman. I could totally find a way to kill someone important and keep the story going.
4. Sorry if quality declines for awhile. Like I said...school is hard. But I will try to get chapts written. But it could only be one a month for awhile...and I'm sorry.
5. Do you want the next chapt to be Cam's or still Rem's?
Remy's POV (Flashback):
"Just go back to the fucking bedroom!" you holler, unable to believe how Cameron is just standing there. Then again, she's probably in shock. You're close enough to being in shock and you weren't even the one playing Joe's game. "Call the police and lock the door!" You press your knee further into Joe's stomach and hold back a cry as he grabs your injured arm. You've pinned him with his back on the couch, one of his legs hanging off the side. You have one hand grasping for the gun and the other trying to prevent him from injuring you.
Much to whatever feelings of relief you can muster, Cameron turns and darts back towards the bedroom door. You feel less concern now that she's out of harm's way. If you die, it won't matter. Your life isn't worth very much anyway.
"Why do you care so much? Not like she's yours anyways," Joe grunts, trying to shove you off of him. He holds up a hand to block a punch you throw at him, but you strike him in the jaw anyway. "You bitch!"
His insult only spurs you on. You steady yourself with one foot on the floor and make another grab for the gun. This time you get a firm grip on the cold metal. It feels so wrong to touch. You shouldn't be in this position where you're forced to even be near a gun right now. The thought makes the weapon feel almost like it's sending shocks up and down your arm but you refuse to let go. You realize if you could get it out of his grasp, you could end it all in self-defense. Is it worth it though? Is Cameron really worth shooting and possibly killing someone over?
You don't know, but you have a feeling you're about to find out. "Let go!" you snarl, both of you freezing to stare at the gun in both yours and his hands.
He chuckles and shakes his head. "You really expect me to let go just because you told me to?" he asks. He keeps a tight hold on the gun with one hand and uses the other to trail his fingers from your cheek and down toward your breasts. "You just might be the only person prettier than she is."
He seems distracted by you and you take the opportunity to knee him hard in the groin. He cries out and lets go of the gun just long enough for you to snatch it from his hand and jump off of him.
You should feel powerful but instead you feel almost like a child. Your hands are quivering as you grip the gun and point it at him, taking a few steps back. "Don't move," you warn him, waiting for the sound of the police running toward your apartment door.
"You wouldn't really shoot me," Joe comments calmly with a smirk. "I don't think you have it in you." He gets to his feet and opens his arms wide.
"Sit back down!" you threaten, placing a finger on the trigger. Right now, he poses no threat. You have every reason to shoot him, but you can't while he just stands there.
"Feisty," he comments with a chuckle. "I don't think you can do anything though. I could go back there and fuck Allison senseless and you'd never have the courage to stand up for her." He takes a few steps to the side. "You'd never-"
A few steps toward where Cameron is hiding is all the reason you need. No longer thinking straight, you pull the trigger and shut your eyes. The gun makes a loud noise and is followed by strangled groan from Joe. Everything suddenly feels like it's going in slow motion. You don't want to look at him, but you need to make sure he's down and isn't going to make anymore advances toward Cameron. Biting back tears, you open your eyes.
Joe falls back onto the couch, his hand on his shoulder, blood seeping through his fingers. He stares at you in shock.
"You keep the hell away from her," you whisper, trying to keep your voice free of emotion. It's hard though because it hits you that if he would had shot at Cameron one more time, she'd be dead on your floor. For a second the thought doesn't even feel real, but it slowly sinks in. If you hadn't tackled him, he would have shot Cameron in the head. "You fucking bastard."
You hear the sirens outside and within a matter of seconds there are footsteps running down the hall. The door flies open without warning and three policemen step inside with guns. "Lower your weapon, Ma'am," one of them warns you, turning his own gun to point it at you.
You quickly drop the gun to the floor and hold your hands up slightly, trying to keep your fear at bay. If one more person points a fucking gun at you, you may just burst into tears. Even being held at gunpoint by the patient at the hospital wasn't as terrifying as this. But back then, you wanted to die up until the point where you were seconds away from it. You don't want to die anymore.
"We received a call from this number earlier stating that you received a threat, is that correct?" another one of the men asks.
The only thing you can do is nod your head.
"Is this the man who called?" the same guy questions you.
You nod again.
"Sir, you're under arrest…"
You tune out the rest, just trying to focus on not crying. You're shaking uncontrollably and you want Cameron. It frightens you that you've become so attached to her that you want her to comfort you. It makes you feel weak and being weak frustrates you. She's already hurt you once and risking that happening again isn't something you're sure you can risk that pain again.
"One of us will be back in less than an hour to get this situation straightened out," one of the men snaps you from your thoughts. They have Joe handcuffed and they're walking him out the door.
You're surprised they don't take you with them as you watch them leave. You did shoot someone after all. Then again, you probably look enough like a mess; standing there near tears in your nightgown, that they probably trust you to stay put. The door shuts and you press your palms hard against your eyes as your chest heaves with a few silent sobs. It takes you almost two minutes to pull yourself together before walking down the hall to tell Cameron it's alright to come out.
You're afraid to see her. You're afraid, that as soon as she opens the doors, you're going to launch yourself into her arms and start crying. Most of all, you're afraid she'd reject you if you did that. It's always easier to reject someone before they have the change to reject you first. You stop at your bedroom door and hesitantly knock. "Allison?" you ask, your voice slightly strangled and just above a whisper.
The door opens so quickly, you nearly jump back. "Rem," she whispers, her voice hoarse from yelling and crying. It sounds like your name is the only thing she can even manage to get out.
"I shot him in the shoulder," you blurt out, unable to get your voice any louder than a whisper. You clench your jaw and wrap your arms around yourself, trying to provide yourself with some sort of comfort. "I think you should leave now." You try to sound distant because you don't want her to leave. The last few days have finally slapped you in the face and you want her to hold you, but you're supposed to be the one comforting her. "The police took him. You can go home now. They'll come question you at your house."
Her face contorts in anguish. "Don't do this," she begs you, her voice cracking. "Everything is- Everything is spinning out of control. Please, don't do this." Tears start filling her eyes again and her jaw begins to tremble. "Remy, pl-"
"I shot someone for you!" you shout, needing her to just leave. You try to catch your breath and quickly lower your voice again. "I pulled the trigger on someone for you, but he was right." You're dying. Why would she want someone dying other than to try to 'fix' them? What if that was the real reason she was here instead of with Chase? "I hear what people say about you. It only makes sense you're here because you think I need you. Well, I just fucking shot someone for you. I don't need any of this!" You're not sure how much you could have gone on like this anyway. It hurts constantly denying that you feel something for her because you don't want to scare her and she has a boyfriend.
She covers her mouth with her hands to muffle a sob. "I don't," she chokes. "No, it's not like that, Remy!" She shakes her head, causing her brown locks to fall in front of her pale, tearstained face and you fight to urge to tuck her hair behind her ear. "Remy, I swear. I'll- I'll prove it to you!"
Her words sound pathetically earnest and you want to believe her. You want to believe that just maybe she isn't out to hurt you. "Yeah?" you ask, using sarcasm as a mechanism of self-defense incase she does really hurt you. Sarcasm is one of the best ways to protect yourself against vulnerability. "And how are you going to do that?"
She takes a step forward and shoves you back against the wall. Your damaged wrist is slightly jostled and as it hits the wall ever so slightly, it becomes engulfed in so much pain you have to bite down on your tongue to prevent yourself from crying out. "If you would have shut up while that guy was pointing a gun at my face, you'd already know!" she yells at you.
By now, you can't even get your chin to stop quivering. Your chest physically aches with the need to just let go and break down. "I was trying to save your life!" you yell back, trying desperately to prove yourself to her.
"And I was trying to tell you I love you incase you failed!" Her grip tightens on her upper arms and she's practically digging her nails into your skin.
Your eyes widen and you gasp before the words even process. The shock you're in intensifies and she continues talking before her previous statement even starts to sink in.
"I was scared to tell you," she states quietly. "But since I obviously just put you through hell and I don't blame you for kicking me out, I thought you should know how I feel," she continues. "Telling you would only be half of how I feel! You want to know how I really feel?!"
The fact that she loves you still hasn't hit you yet. It seems too surreal. No one has ever fallen in love with you before and it would have been a shock if someone ever did. But now the person you love loves you back and it just doesn't seem possible. Cameron does loves you though. You stare at her with your mouth agape, absolutely stunned by this. She told you she loves you and now there's more? How much more can there be?! "Yes," you finally manage to give out and nod your head. You try to seem confident and in control but you know you're failing. Even if she hurt you before, you've never felt so safe on the verge of breaking down in front of someone before.
She swallows and takes a deep breath then looks away from you for a moment. She seems to be considering something and it scares you as to what that something could be. There's going to be a 'but'; you can feel it. There's going to be an 'I love you, but', because that's just how your life works. You scrunch up your face as you try to hold back sobs and turn away from her, unable to look at her anymore. You're exhausted both mentally and physically and your arm is killing you. The feeling of her warm hands on your cheeks is enough to make you want to just melt into her embrace. You're still unsure of what she's going to do or what she wants from you.
She straightens up so she's more at your level then leans forward and lets her lips brush against yours. It takes a moment to comprehend Cameron is kissing you. She's delicate and gentle with you as if one wrong move might break you. It's a feeling you've never experienced before and you gasp as it sends chills up your spine. Your shoulders start shaking with repressed sobs and the tears finally begin flowing because you realize she's trying to comfort you and not hurt you. You slowly slide your good hand into her hair and twist the locks around your fingers as you find the emotional strength to kiss her back. It's sweeter than you ever dreamed. You choke back a sob, overwhelmed now by the feeling she gives you. Never in your life have you felt so much for someone that it made your heart physically ache. She soothingly caresses your cheeks with her thumbs and presses her lips to yours in a kiss that makes your heart skip multiple beats.
Her tongue slides across your lower lips and causes you to cry harder, everything from the past few days (or maybe everything since you found out you were dying) leaking out in the form of tears. You part your lips and allow her to deepen the kiss, trying to absorb whatever comfort and adoration she has for you. Allowing yourself to be broken in front of her seems like more than enough to show your trust and love for her until she pulls away.
She stands up even straighter and leans her forehead against yours. "I'll go," she whispers.
Even though your eyes are still closed, you can feel her staring at you. Her gaze is practically burning a hole through you. Your chest hurts at the thought of losing her again. "Don't go," murmur in a strained voice, trying to find the right words. "I thought- I thought…he was going." It's hard to speak and choke back sobs at the same time so you finally just let go.. "I thought I'd lost you. Please, just don't go."