"I see trees of green,
Red roses too,
I see them bloom,
For me and you,
And I think to myself,
What a wonderful world."
‒What a Wonderful World
Louis Armstrong
Betelgeuse chuckled and nodded, pressing his lips to her forehead a moment before going to check on the girls. They were sleeping soundly, Bubbie curled up beneath the crib to stand guard. Satisfied, he went about stuffing stockings and wrapping the last of the gifts. Another cup of spiked cocoa was summoned from the kitchen and he dug his Santa hat out of a closet before popping it onto his head.
Before he knew it, midnight was rolling through and the sound of sleigh bells were heard on the roof. When the fat man appeared, Betel was waiting with room temperature milk and cookies he managed to conjure up from a bakery in the living realm.
"Nick. Good to see ya. Hope ya came prepared, the girls were waitin' for ya."
"Betel," the plump man greeted curtly, shaking embers from the fireplace off with a well-practiced jostle of his shoulders.
"Yet again, I never cease to be amazed by your astronomical luck."
Without wasting any time, Saint Nick went about placing randomly sized and shaped boxes carefully around the tree, as well as filling up each stocking with personalized treats and trinkets.
"Lydia Deetz has always been on my nice list, despite how often you insist upon her naughtiness."
With a sly smirk, Santa slid a slim box beneath the tree; a red teddy with a puffy white trim— but Betelgeuse had no way of knowing this. Charming wives and heckling husbands was just one of the perks of the job. Missus Claus didn't seem to mind too much.
"Let's hope my little snowmakers inherit more of her virtuous qualities."
"Your snowmakers huh? Last I checked they were mine." He handed the ancient man the cookies and cocoa, glancing back at his wife with a smile.
"N' yeah, I know. 'Lucky' don't begin ta cover it." He took a moment to tuck the blanket tighter around Lydia when she shifted in her sleep.
"They're asleep upstairs, though I'm sure you knew that. Am I Inchin up the list yet? I left my family for a week to help a woman I hated. Does that count fer shit?" As if he cared. Chuckling, he shook his head and lit up a smoke.
"Can't help noticin' ya didn't bring me coal this year."
"I know everything," the spritely, aged creature corrected with the heaviness of someone burdened with such exorbitant knowledge, snagging one of the cookies from the plate in front of Betelgeuse before he could be denied. Cookies and milk were a fair price, all things considered.
"I know that you worked a job you don't have to and don't particularly enjoy as much— anymore, I should say— just to make your wife feel better. I know that you haven't had anyone in that cellar of yours since… well. We both know who was there. I know that you showed your father-in-law mercy that you didn't have and didn't want to give."
A twinkle flashed across the old man's bright baby blues, and what he said next came out so smooth and easily on his jovial voice that the darkness of it was hidden behind an illusion of friendliness.
"You could've just gotten rid of him. Sweet Lydia never would have found out. Then you wouldn't have to worry about any other Daddy's coming to birthdays and Christmas dinners, spoiling all your little secrets."
Saint Nick let out a hearty chuckle, quiet enough to leave Lydia sleeping but still convey the sadistic joy he felt at bearing witness to the most notorious member of his naughty list's domestic plight.
"But you didn't. And now you don't get any coal. Isn't that nice?"
Betel scoffed and swiftly urged the man out of his house. He was getting soft, and it was all Lydia's fault. Glancing at his wife curled up as she was on the couch, that train of thought was forgotten at the realization she was going to get a crick in her neck if she stayed like that.
Carefully, he lifted her into his arms and carried her to bed, laying her on her favorite pillow and kissing her forehead, then went back down to decorate the tree. She wouldn't mind this year. They had the rest of forever, after all.
Come morning, the house was filled with delicious smells and bright, happy decor, a tray of fresh, hot cinnamon rolls waiting for the family to wake.
The magic that came along with Christmas morning was too enchanting for the disappointment that Lydia missed Santa Claus's visit to last very long. With just as much excitable energy as the previous year, she rushed to get the girls ready in their precious Christmas jammies and carry them downstairs.
She had woken alone, but it was alright. Daddy was taking care of things, and she had Percy and Luna to keep her warm. Tip-toeing down the stairs with a sleepy baby on each hip, she grinned at the sight of her husband in a bathrobe, boxers, his Santa hat, and a steaming mug of black coffee. There was a plate of cinnamon rolls on the coffee table, a couple already ripped into bite-size pieces for the girls.
"Mama…" Holly tugged lightly on her mother's hair, pointing at the tree. "Snow."
"Snow?" Ivy perked up at the word their mother had been hammering into them all month long, morning bleariness clearing from her little face as she noticed the bright lights.
"Snow!"
As if on cue, soft white flakes started to fall outside the window, the babies squealing and wiggling until they were freed, crawling at high speed to watch the snowfall. Betelgeuse stood, grinning, proud of his legacy and what they were already capable of.
"Wow! That didn't take much, did it..." He pulled his wife into his side, handing her her coffee and kissing her temple. "Merry Christmas, Momma."
The babies were slapping the window and yelling, and Betel chuckled and set his cup down before scooping them up, one under each arm. "That's my girls! Look at all that snow... you two ready for some breakfast?"
Brimming with delight at the sudden change in weather, Lydia gazed on with childlike wonder much as she had the previous year when snow started falling, before being forced into enduring the long, painful process of labor. There were no such distractions this year, allowing her to watch undisturbed as the white little puffs slowly blanketed the ground.
The coffee was perfect, as always; a lovely shade of light caramel brown with a heady hazelnut scent. The cinnamon rolls were even better, the first swallow of warm dough and cinnamon going down with a euphoric groan.
"Merry Christmas, Daddy," she returned, planting a sticky icing kiss on his cheek after he tugged her close. He gathered the babes then, both of them wide awake now and showing all their fangs, happy to have their Daddy back home.
"You feed Thing One and Thing Two," Lydia directed, giving each of them sticky kisses as well when they puckered their tiny lips up at her in request, "and I'll start sorting the haul into piles."
Comically large as it was, it would be best to start moving everything into Ivy, Holly, Both, and Lydia piles now. Make it easier to work through it all, or they would still be unwrapping by the time Adam and Barb showed up.
He nodded and kissed her once more before letting her go and settling the girls in their high chairs.
"Lil monsters! You ready?" He gave them each several bits of the breakfast and watched happily as Lydia started sorting, warmth furling in his chest. This was what he wanted in life and death had given it to him; happy wife, happy children. Everyone healthy. He couldn't ask for more.
Lost in his thoughts, he wasn't really paying attention and before he knew it Holly had her tiny fangs sunk into his finger. He stared at her for a long moment, hardly able to feel the sting.
"Holly... what the fuck. It's Christmas."
She let go of him and laughed. "Fuck! Kimmas."
"Betelgeuse." Lydia delivered sharply, sending a severe glance his way to remind that she could still banish his ass in a heartbeat if need be. Cursing in passing was inevitable. Cursing in direct speech with them was a big no-no in Mommy's book.
"Stop encouraging her."
Somehow, there were even more presents than last year. It didn't take long to rack up four sizable piles, an occasional box put aside for her husband. This year, Lydia had the foresight and time to wrap presents at the boutique, then sneak them home and into the closet under the guise of them being presents for the girls.
"This is excessive, Beej," Lydia complained at one point, shoving a heavy box into the twin's hoard of treasures. "If we do this every year, we'll end up with a hoarder mansion."
He shrugged and scooped up Ivy, carrying both twins into the living room where they immediately wiggled until put down to crawl toward the tree. His daughters' holiday spirit gave him ample time to pull his wife into his lap and kiss her firmly. With a crook of his finger, all the stockings save his own floated over.
"Girls, come here." The twins ignored him until he dropped the bomb. "Santa came and brought you goodies."
Just like their mother, they lit up at the mention of the familiar "happy" word and made their way over, Ivy crawling upright like a little puppy and Holly scooting along the floor on her butt.
He chuckled and scooped them up, putting them in Lydia's arm like some kind of family totem pole. He helped them go through their stockings. More stuffed animals that Betel swore were from St. Nick, new pacifiers, and clips to keep track of them. Their favorite snacks, and Betel's favorite. He picked them up in the living world.
"Sugar mice! They're like lollipops." He pulled one out and let Holly teethe on it, her eyes lighting up at the sweet, fruity flavor. "I used to make em for the kids in my town... but I ain't got the mold or the patience these days. Want one, Ivy-bug?"
Lydia sunk indulgently into his lap and closed her eyes for a couple beats, her babies comfortably nestled half on her, half on him. This was a position they knew well. Movie nights were a common occurrence and often ended with all three girls passed out exactly as they were right now.
Moment savored, she returned to admiring the twins' delight at their stockings' innards, then took her own stocking once Holly wriggled over onto her father's knee and she could loop her arms around Ivy to get at it. There was chocolate for days, as well as a lovely vintage choker in unusual white lace with gold accents, a square cut ruby demanding attention right in the center. It came in an oblong velvet box marked "from Daddy" so Lydia knew who to thank.
Just like last Christmas, she put his gifted trinket on immediately and festivities commenced. Both of the girls got home carved, polished, and stained wooden alphabet blocks from their father, rocking horses they weren't quite old enough to play on yet, and countless other toys that kept them solidly entertained while Lydia worked through her bounty.
"Open one, Beej!" She encouraged, pleasantly surprised to see there wasn't any coal in his stocking. "You have stuff!"
The choker-turned-collar looked perfect on her, just as he thought, and he couldn't help leaning over to nibble at the edge of the lace, pulling her farther into his lap.
With the girls entertained and his wife insisting, he pulled a box into his lap. Wrapped in festive paper, the tag read "to Daddy, love H+I." Inside was a candy-striped tie, and he had to chuckle. He had gotten a similar Father's day present earlier in the year and adored it as much as he did this one.
The next box was from Lydia and revealed that there was a new suit, just like the year before. Red and white pinstripes, there was even a sharp-looking fedora to top the outfit off. He grinned and pulled her into a kiss.
"It's beautiful, baby. Thank you."
"I'm going to make you a new one every year," she decided, beaming under his praise. "I promise not to do Christmas colors every time."
It always made her feel warm and fuzzy to see him wear the things she made for him. The candy cane tie from the girls, they helped but it was a creation of hers, would match the suit beautifully. Once about half of everything was unwrapped, the girls were babbling away and playing with their new toys, and Lydia was bedecked with jewels over her cozy pajamas, the holiday excitement dimmed down to a peaceful hum for a .
She crawled toward her husband, snagging one of the now cooled off cinnamon buns on her way, and settled comfortably between his legs on the floor, leaning against his knee.
"Promise you'll always love me this much?"
With his family happy and his heart full, Betelgeuse found that he couldn't feel more alive.
When Lydia settled between his legs he grinned down at her, his fingers tracing her features gently.
"Wouldn't have it any other way, Lyds."
THE END