Note: I almost titled this chapter "In the Room Where it Happened" because I couldn't get that Hamilton song out of my head when I was writing this first scene. Enjoy learning about how the proverbial synth sausage gets made (…that sounded dirtier than I meant).
I'm sorry about the long delay. This chapter threw me for a loop narrative-wise and I procrastinated on other things while my mind could piece out how I wanted this all to go. There's a lot of moving pieces I'm trying to keep track of.
Oh and drama, drama, and more drama ahead.
Chapter 3 - Uneasy Alliances
Nora paced the Binet's living quarters as Dr. Binet poured over the Project Genesis reports. His dishwater blond hair hung in his face as he muttered under his breath. His grey eyes darted from diagram to diagram as he tried to formulate an answer to temper Nora's outrage.
"Did you know about Nick?" Nora asked through clenched teeth.
Dr. Binet looked at her with eyes that were full of regret and then nodded. "In a way, yes. But, Nora what you have to understand is that NiMA —"
"— His name is Nick." Nora interjected.
"Nick," Dr. Binet corrected himself, "was constructed generations ago. As perverse as it may sound, we've learned a lot from Nick's experience, and as a result of his sacrifice, our manufactured memory sequences adhere better and create less psychological confusion to the Gen-3 synths."
"Wonderful! I'm sure Nick will be happy to know that all his suffering wasn't in vain." Nora sneered.
He sighed, "Look, I understand your anger. There's a reason why we abandoned this project after what happened. Many scientists, myself included, question the morality and ethics of what we do here, but still we persist because we believe that in the long run our scientific findings will help humanity."
"How? How could this benefit humanity?" Nora gestured at the papers on his desk, "The more I learn about this Project Genesis, the more I believe in the rumors that the Institute's main plan was to abduct and replace all humans with synth copies all along."
Dr. Binet shook his head, "Nora, I know that your experiences with us have been less than ideal but I promise you that the current members involved in Project Genesis — Dr. Li, Dr. Secord, and myself — have no ulterior motives in achieving our goals."
She rifled through the papers and pulled out five that were paper clipped together and showed them to Dr. Binet. These were the very same ones that she read last night. "The terminal transcripts said that the Institute has been pulling from Vault 111 to help supplement the synth's memories. What does that mean?"
Dr. Binet sighed and sank heavily into his office chair. He looked weary and ill as a result of Nora's barrage of questions. "Nora, I know you're upset but you —"
"— tell me now." She growled.
Dr. Binet met her eyes. "When I construct the Gen-3 synths, their memories are vague and malleable. They have enough cognitive function to operate their vital bodily functions but the rest of the process happens behind closed doors. They are sent to a secure area in the Robotics lab to be processed."
"How are you getting memories from Vault 111?" Nora clarified. "Father told me that he terminated their life support when he released me. Are you pulling memories from dead people?"
Dr. Binet frowned, "I think you misunderstand. The memories from Vault 111 — yours and your husband's included — were downloaded onto the Institute's databases almost one hundred and fifty years ago. Forgive me for sounding callous, but you all could've died a long time ago and we would've still had your memories."
Nora gaped at him and let the gravity of his answer sink in. Even if she didn't make it out of the Vault, Nora would've always been a slave to the Institute in some way.
"This is insane. Completely and utterly fucked up." Nora seethed to herself. Then she rounded on Dr. Binet once more. "How are you all okay with this? The more I learn about the Institute's experiments, the less I'm convinced that the wasteland will ever be able to accept you."
Dr. Binet frowned and Nora saw that she struck a nerve. "Accept us? Nora, you'll find that very few of us want to be accepted by the wasteland. If my son wasn't already out there, I would've wrote the wasteland off as a world devoid of life. What the Institute does — what it's done for over two hundred years — is innovate and push the envelope of scientific discovery. Now I will not deny that some of our experiments had consequences, but not many of us in the Institute need to be accepted by the Commonwealth."
Nora knew that he was right. She felt like she was trying to stop a train from running her down through sheer willpower alone. It would be foolish and, frankly, a waste of her time to argue the point now. No, she'd table the discussion about the Institute's isolationist policies for now."
"So what does this mean for Nick?" She asked. "He deserves to know the truth about how he was created. Are you ready to be held responsible for your predecessor's sins?"
Dr. Binet frowned and considered her question, "I can try to answer his questions, but at this point, his confusion over his identity is more of an internal conflict that he'll have to address on his own. Still, I'd be willing to speak with him."
"I need you to guarantee his safety if he comes here." Nora replied. She remembered Nick's insistence in coming to the Institute in the first place. It seemed fickle of her to now to open that door again after firmly shutting it, but she now had information about Nick's life that almost necessitated a change in heart.
"You're the Director. As long as he's under your guidance and under your protection, he could do almost anything — save for murdering one of us — and he'd be left alone." Dr. Binet replied.
Nora nodded. She felt weary and exhausted. "Is there anything else that I need to know about Project Genesis or the Institute's previous synth-related plans?"
She expected Dr. Binet to say 'no' but his silence spoke volumes.
"There is one more thing." He replied quietly.
"What?"
Dr. Binet sighed and pressed a button on the intercom near his desk. "Dr. Li would you please bring S9-23 to my residence. I think it's time that Nora meets him."
There was only a minute hesitation before Dr. Li replied, "Right away."
"Who is S9-23?" Nora asked.
Dr. Binet pinched the bridge of his thick, curved nose. "Before he gets here, it is imperative that you know that he was created against all of our wishes. Father insisted on it. Dr. Li and I tried to tell him that the experiment alone breached several lines of ethics — both out of science and out of basic human rights — but he wouldn't heed our warnings."
"What is he?" Nora asked. After Super Mutants and synths, she couldn't imagine what the Institute could create that would get this much of a reaction from their scientists.
"He's a child." Dr. Binet replied quietly.
"Excuse me?"
Dr. Binet's eyes met hers and she saw that he was telling the truth. "He is a child Nora. A synth child. Father asked us to create a child that looked like he was around nine or ten years old. He is kept in Dr. Li's Advanced Systems laboratory most of the time. After he was created, Dr. Li requested that he be kept close to her. Father agreed. Mostly because I was busy raising Liam and Dr. Li is childless but was more than willing to take care of him."
"What kind of child is he? Who is he suppose to be?" Nora asked.
Dr. Binet's watery blue eyes looked guilty. He wet his lips before he continued and confessed his sins.
"He was created based on Father's real DNA. He's similar to a clone, I suppose. A clone who was programmed with artificial memories of a life he never lived. Of a childhood he never had." He replied.
Nora tried to piece everything together. Kellogg had once taunted her by saying that her son was a 'great kid' but he was 'a little older than what she would be expecting.' Obviously her son's advanced age had caught her off guard, but the way Kellogg talked about Father — as though hew as a mere child — seemed off. Then it clicked in her mind.
"He was the one that Kellogg brought with him to Diamond City. He was the bait to lure me here!" She exclaimed.
"Please don't hold that against him." Dr. Binet warned. "He had no choice in the matter. He didn't ask to be created. Please just treat him with the same civility and kindness that you would treat any other child."
Nora sank into the empty plastic loveseat. She had just mourned the death of her real flesh and blood son not two weeks ago, and now she had to deal with the fact that her son had essentially created a clone? She didn't have enough time to sort through her own feelings before the automatic door slid open and Dr. Li walked into the Binet residence with the child in question.
"Thank you for coming, Dr. Li." Dr. Binet said and rose to meet the duo as they walked through the living room. "And Shaun, how are you doing young man?"
Nora observed the scene from afar and she picked up on three significant realizations. One, Nora saw that the tall, slender Dr. Binet knelt down to meet the child's eyes. He talked in a soft, soothing tone like one would use with a child who was either scared or prone to frightening easily. Two, she noted that he called the child Shaun and not his scientific alphanumerical identification. Three, she saw that the young child's youthful, innocent eyes were exactly like hers — almond shaped with thick lashes and green rather than Nate's deep blue.
But Father didn't have green eyes, she thought.
"Who's that Dr. B?" The child asked and pointed shyly at Nora.
"That's a friend of mine. D'you want to meet her?" He replied.
"Is she nice?" He asked and looked at both Dr. Binet and Dr. Li for confirmation.
"She's nicer than me." Dr. Li replied with a small smile and gave him a little nudge forward. "Go on."
The child in question walked into Dr. Binet's small office. He clenched his hands and fiddled with the Institute grey tunic that he wore. His dark brown hair was neatly combed and his thin, angular face held both timid curiosity and childlike astuteness.
"What happened to your face?" He asked and pointed at the thick cybernetic scar that stretched from her temple to her ear.
"Um…" Nora's voice failed her.
"Shaun, is that a polite question?" Dr. Binet asked in a paternal scolding sort of way.
The child looked ashamed, "I'm sorry. Um …" The child tried to search for another question but his inquisitive mind won out. "How did you get that scar on your face?"
"I …" Nora paused. Could she blame Father, or perhaps Dr. Ayo, for the scar? Would the child understand the complex world that she had to navigate only a few months before? She looked helplessly at Dr. Binet who then gave the kid a gentle push forward.
"Shaun, try asking her something about herself. Remember how we taught you how to talk to my son? Ask her those sorts of questions." He suggested.
"Do you … like to read?" Shaun asked as though he was picking a question randomly out of the air.
Nora cleared her throat. "I read a fair amount before the —" She had to stop herself from saying bombs in case that particular detail scared the kid, and then said "— before I got here."
Shaun looked thoughtful as he considered her answer. "What's your favorite book?"
"That's a hard question." Nora replied with a small, approving smile. "I would have to say it's Bridge to Terabithia. My mom use to read it to me when I was a kid."
Shaun looked confused, "But what does it teach you? What do you learn from it?"
Nora shrugged, "I don't know what you can learn from it. It's just meant to be a story, a sad story, but hopeful in a way."
"Huh." He replied as though he was digesting and working through a complex math problem. "Nora, would you read me that bridge book? I'd like to learn about bridges."
Dr. Binet shook his head and gently led Shaun back to Dr. Li. "Shaun, Nora's busy working right now. But maybe she can read with you another time."
"Okay." Shaun sighed. There was unmistakeable disappointment in his voice. "Dr. Li. Can I play Atomic Command on your terminal? I have to try and beat Liam's high score."
Dr. Li gently touched his shoulder and guided him towards the exit. "We'll talk about it when we get back to the lab."
Dr. Binet waved to Shaun as though he was waving good-bye to his own son as he went off to school. For a man who hated Father, he treated a clone of him remarkably well, Nora thought.
When the duo left, Dr. Binet turned cautiously to her. "Nora. It was Father's plan to have me program the synth so it recognized you as his mother. I hope that I wasn't too presumptuous to disobey that order."
Nora wiped at tears that somehow dripped down her face. She wasn't even aware that she had been crying. "No. That's — That is probably for the best."
She cleared her throat and collected the assortment of documents from Dr. Binet's desk and clipped them together once again. Her face remained neutral and business-like as she faced Dr. Binet.
"I'll be announcing some more plans to connect some of our Gen-3 synths up with The Railroad. There's still a small faction of synths who want to go topside, and without Liam's guidance, they will need a direct connection to a Railroad agent. I already know the announcement will be unpopular, but can I trust that you'll stand behind me?:
Dr. Binet frowned. He disliked The Railroad and their simplistic and idealistic views as much as the next scientist, but he also thought about Liam. His son was probably out there risking his life to save these synths, so it seemed only right to support his son in whatever way he could.
"You have my support, Nora." He replied.
Later that night, Nora heard a firm knock at her door.
"Come in." She called out.
The door slid open and Nate stepped through. He was still walking stiffly but his face didn't betray that he was in discomfort or pain.
"Nora, can I speak with you for a moment?" He asked. His tone was serious and now that most of Nora's ire and frustration had been unleashed on Dr. Binet, she didn't have the energy or the desire to lay into Nate as well.
She nodded. "Do you want to sit down?"
He shook his head. "Sitting for too long causes me pain. Dr. Volkert says that I still have some internal injuries that are healing."
Nora scrutinized his demeanor. He stood upright and confident but his fingers fidgeted at his side. He looked tired and miserable. Dark shadows colored beneath his eyes betraying the truth that he didn't get much sleep despite being in the infirmary.
Nate spoke first and without prompting. His words came out in a long exhaled confession, "Nora, I'm sorry."
She rose from her seat and stood a arm's distance away.
"I know." She replied softly, her voice barely louder than a whisper. "I'm sorry too."
He looked at her balefully. "Nora. I'm sorry for the things I said to you. I was angry, in pain, and I was upset. I was out of line and my behavior was inappropriate. I'm sorry for interfering with your life, for showing up at the Starlight Drive In and again at the Vault just expecting things to be back again like they were."
"You didn't really have a choice to not show up." Nora replied gently. "Father sent you there to get me to come back."
Nate shook his head. "No. I wanted you to come back. You were the first thought I had when I woke up here. The rest of my memories were mostly of muddled, but you…you were clear, and when I overheard the scientists gossiping about what had happened between you and Ayo, I begged Father to let you come back."
"Nate, all of this is crazy." She tried to say that as gently as she could. "I care about you; not because you look like my dead husband or have his memories, but because the Institute has screwed you over the most. I care about you. I empathize with you. But I cannot be the Nora you want me to be. Too much has changed. I've changed."
"I know." He replied miserably, "I didn't want to admit that to myself. I realized that I'm afraid. I'm afraid that if I lost you, then maybe I've lost myself too. I'm only Nate Pendleton because that's what my memories tell me. I don't actually know if I can I be someone different."
Nora sighed. She wanted to embrace him, to comfort him, but she knew that doing so would already muddle the lines that he was trying to draw in the sand.
"This is a shit situation for both of us." Nora replied. "And I'm sorry too."
"For what?"
"For leading you on, I guess. For asking too much out of you when my son died. For expecting you to be my husband, when — when you're clearly not."
"Nora, no —"
She waved off his protest and continued, "Nate when I first saw you, I thought that my husband had come back from the dead. It was hard for me to differentiate between the truth that my husband is dead and the fantasy that Shaun wanted us all to live in. I think I let myself get briefly caught up in that fantasy, and that's not fair to you."
"So where do we go from here then?" Nate asked.
Nora thought for a moment. The terminal trilled its usual 'you've-got-mail' beep and Nate's eyebrow cocked in interest. "That's not a standard Institute terminal is it?"
Nora gave him a wry smile. "No. But it may help me organize a plan that will help both of us out. Here's what you need to do …"
"For the last time, I strenuously object Mother." Dr. Secord cried. "Teaching synths how to fight when they are not part of the Courser division - which Father disavowed, I might add - is like teaching a cannibal to be a vegetarian. It's never going to work! Furthermore, enticing them with false promises of being released topside is damaging to the firmly established hierarchy. Synths serve us, not the other way around."
Nora massaged her temples and exhaled in a long, frustrated breath. "Dr. Binet what do you think about this? Do you think our Gen-3 synths can handle life topside?"
Dr. Binet frowned as the considered the question. "Well, they are naturally more resistant to radiation. Most synths possess average to above-average intelligence and we've heard reports of previous escaped synths who are successful despite the wasteland's dangers. I'd say it's no more dangerous than it is for a normal human."
"You're just saying that because your son was exiled to the wasteland for this very reason." Dr. Secord seethed, "For all you know, your son could be dead out there. Do you really want to send our synths topside unprepared just because you can? Did you learn nothing from your son's mistake?"
Dr. Binet's normally kind face twisted into a cruel sneer, "Don't lecture me about rule-breaking. Consider how you came to your position as the SRB Division head and then we'll talk about it. My son made a bad choice, but he had the right motivation. Your predecessor on the other hand -"
"- That's enough, Dr. Binet." Nora commanded. The bite in her voice was half-hearted.
"Nora is right." Dr. Li interjected. "Now that we have the nuclear reactor up and running, our next goal was to improve the Institute's reputation with the world topside. We cannot do that if we treat the very people who will be representing the Institute in the wasteland as prisoners."
"They are not people. They are tools." Dr. Secord hissed.
"See, this is where we have differing opinions Doctor." Dr. Li replied cooly. "People. Tools. At this point, we are arguing semantics. We need the synths who want to leave to do so. They are not doing us any favors by staying here. Nora has already explained that The Railroad has several safehouses set up to help escort synths safely through the wasteland."
Half the room groaned at the mention of The Railroad.
"Not those synth-liberating terrorists!" Dr. Holdren interjected. "As soon as we let our first batch go, they'll be looking to storm the entire Institute so they can free all technology - down to the last toaster."
"You don't have to like them, " Nora replied, "but like it or not, they are our allies."
"And who is going to go to make sure our synths meet up with The Railroad?" Dr. Secord asked. "If you leave, we are left vulnerable without a Director and we're screwed if you die topside. You were hand-picked by Father - for who-knows-the-reason - to lead us. The other scientists here will follow you unquestioningly because of that, but they wont give any of us the same support."
For once Dr. Secord was right, Nora thought.
"Send me." Nate said.
The entire Directorate turned to see Nate standing in the doorway. He was a little paler than normal and was favoring his right leg, but he was confident and determined.
"Excuse me?" Dr. Li asked.
"Send me to help lead the group to The Railroad." Nate repeated. "Nora is right. There's a sizable group of Gen-3 synths who want to be set free, and the longer you hold them, the more chance that you'll have a mutiny on your hands. I understand that you are concerned about their well-being, especially since our affairs topside haven't really been in the best interest of the people there. But I'm already battle ready. I've been trained as a Courser, and I have Sergeant Nate Pendleton's memories from his campaign in Anchorage. I know the wasteland, and I've proven my loyalty."
"Quiet synth, this is a closed meeting." Dr. Secord snapped venomously. "If you're as loyal as you claim, you'll shut your mouth and speak only when spoken to."
Nate obeyed but stood erect and confident in front of the Directorate. His piercing blue eyes never left Nora's.
"Nate, you would be expected to remain topside for an undetermined period of time. You could be out there for a couple days, or maybe a couple of months. Are you sure you are ready for that?" Nora asked.
"Yes, ma'm." He replied.
"Are you confident that your healing injuries will not get in the way of this mission?" Nora asked.
"Yes ma'am." He replied.
"And you're sure this is what you want?" Nora asked.
"Yes ma'm." The speed in which he said that cut to Nora's core. Although they had spent the previous night hashing out this plan, Nate's desire to get out of the Institute was not a ruse. After helping Nora with her own personal favor, he planned to stay in the wasteland and act as an intermediary between the Institute and The Railroad.
"Then you have my permission to lead a group of five synths topside. Let's meet after this and I'll brief you on your directive, is that understood?" Nora asked.
"Yes ma'am."
Nora was glad that Nate didn't salute her before he turned on his heels with military precision and left.
"You're making a mistake. "Dr. Secord seethed as she stalked out of the room after Nate.
Nora took a deep breath so that her stomach muscles would unclench. She had no idea if this plan would work. There were a ton of unknown variables at play, and each one could result in Nate's death, but Nora knew that this was a risk she had to take.
"Thank you for your attention. You are dismissed." She told the other four scientists who were watching her warily.
They rose from their seats and filtered out of the room without a word. She followed after them and climbed the stairs to her private quarters.
Earlier that morning, she had sent Nick a message briefly explaining that Nate would be stopping by to talk with him. She didn't want Nick to feel pressured, and didn't want Diamond City to think their resident synth detective was being abducted by the Institute, so she kept the details vague.
When she checked the terminal, she saw that Nick's response was short: I'll be waiting, doll.
Nora smirked as an old military adage popped into her mind. She had done all that she could do for the time being. Now she needed all of the moving pieces on the chessboard to reach their destinations.
Nora had to hurry up and wait.