Content Warning: Character deaths
Chapter 18: The Eleventh Hour
The entire Brotherhood stood outside the Boston Airport in the middle of the sleet, cold, and mud as the giant construct powered on.
"Would you like the honor of pushing the big red button?" Proctor Ingram asked Dr. Li with a wry smile.
"No." Dr. Li replied flatly.
After this monstrosity was activated, Dr. Li wanted nothing else to do with the Brotherhood of Steel. She upheld her end of the bargain. She got Liberty Prime working again. Now the least they could do is let her go back to the Institute and die with some dignity.
Proctor Ingram pushed the activation button and Liberty Prime's central processors were brought online.
Heat pulsed from the robot as its nuclear-powered core drove power to each limb's actuator. The robot made two tentative steps in place as the stabilizing arms from the power frame released like a mother releasing her child to take its first steps.
Liberty Prime's voice boomed, "STARTUP SEQUENCE INITIALIZING. POWER OUTPUT … NOMINAL. ELIMINATION OF CHINESE COMMUNIST SYMPATHIZERS…IMPERATIVE."
Dr. Li felt her stomach clench as the robot's voice brought her back to the Capital Wasteland. She could almost hear the high-pitched whine of the Enclave's vertibirds as they descended on the Arlington Memorial bridge.
"He's a thing of beauty, ain't he?" Proctor Ingram said. The beaming expression of maternal pride and the sound of giddy excitement in her voice made Dr. Li's blood run cold. She witnessed a similar reaction from Dr. Ayo when his synthetic Watchers were brought online.
Elder Maxson watched the scene from atop the wooden scaffolding that crisscrossed the airport's barricades. His normally surly expression looked downright blood-thirsty as he watched his greatest weapon take its first steps.
"Alright…let's see what this baby can do!" Proctor Ingram cried. She pushed a series of buttons on the terminal in front of them and Liberty Prime's eyes pulsed a deep turquoise blue.
"TARGET PARAMETERS SET. INITIATION OF NUCLEAR STRIKE. HOSTILE FORCES WILL BE DESTROYED."
Liberty Prime turned away from the Prydwen and from Elder Maxson. It raised one hulking arm and two mini nukes fired over the wooden barricade and struck the concrete parking garage structure 400 meters away.
A black and red mushroom cloud rose into the air; the sheer heat from the blast and the telltale radiation that followed burned Dr. Li's right cheek like a bad sunburn. When the smoke cleared, the parking garage was in flames. The nuclear engines in the rusted out cars created mini explosions which shook the ground and threw more sulfurous and noxious smoke into the air.
Dr. Li bit her tongue against the terror that gripped her chest. God, even if the Institute somehow managed to survive this onslaught, she could never forgive herself for the part she had played in creating this sort of destructive power. Nothing she ever created in the Institute could compare to the sheer evil and destruction that Liberty Prime would wrought.
"Liberty Prime's power functions are fully operational with 95-98% efficiency. He's operating even better than he did at the Citadel." Proctor Ingram reported. "Elder, what are your orders now?"
The Elder took in a long, steady breath as he surveyed his soldiers. His voice was deep and clear when he issued his command. "Paladins, assemble your teams and gather your weaponry and report to me at 0500. All scribes are to report to Proctor Quinlan for battle assignments and instructions. Lancers will report to Lancer-Captain Kellis on the bridge. Scribe Asher assures me that the rain and fog will clear by tomorrow morning, therefore, we will march on the Institute by then. You may direct any questions to either Proctor Ingram or myself. Ad Victoriam!"
The chorus of voices cried out the response with zealous fervor that shook the very scaffolding Dr. Li was standing on. Proctor Ingram's eyes blazed with a wild fury. The hydraulics in her Power Armor were working overtime to keep up with her prancing-like movements as she ran from console to console pressing buttons and throwing switches to activate Liberty Prime's other terrifying features.
Dr. Li saw Elder Maxson descend the wooden barricade to catch a vertibird back up to the Prydwen, so she took her chance and raced down the slick metal scaffolding to meet him on the ground.
"Elder Maxson!" She yelled.
He gave her as much notice as a dog would give a flea. "I'm quite busy Dr. Li."
"I've held up my end of the bargain!" She yelled. "I've helped you bring Liberty Prime back online. Now it's time to uphold yours. Release me and let me go."
"You will be released once our mission is complete." He said.
"It is complete! I've helped you re-construct Liberty Prime."
The Elder shook his head, "Dr. Li. The mission was and has always been to eliminate the Institute threat from the Commonwealth. As we have not yet done that, you are not yet allowed to leave."
Dr. Li faltered and stopped in her tracks. "Y-you! God damn you Arthur! That wasn't part of the deal!"
Elder Maxson cocked a thick eyebrow at the pure vitriol in her voice. He walked towards her. Mud splashed out of his way with each heavy step. His eyes squinted against the rain which bled into a furious glare.
Dr. Li felt the heat of his breath on her cheek as he spoke in a low whisper. "Maddison, are you really that naive to think that I would let you go just as we are on the eve of battle? You ran from us once. Now I will not allow you to leave until I deem it necessary. In the meantime, you will report to Scribe Neriah back on the Prydwen. That is an order Dr. Li."
Dr. Li choked on the insults that rose to her throat. She had worked too hard and had fought for too long to be denied this now. "I am not your soldier to command Maxson."
Elder Maxson's lips pursed into an irritated scowl. "If you will not follow my command, then I will have you arrested and detained until the battle is over."
"You can't do —"
All Maxson had to do was snap his fingers and two fully armored Paladins marched up to Dr. Li and grabbed her by each arm.
"NO! DAMN YOU MAXSON!" The woman shrieked.
He looked at Dr. Li but addressed the two soldiers at her side. "Put her in the brig until I decide what to do with her. Bound and gag her if her hysterics don't stop."
"Yes sir!" They said in unison.
"Oh and there's one more thing." Elder Maxson said. He snapped his fingers and two Knights came out of the airport dragging James's half-ghoulified body between them.
By now, James had lost all of his hair. The skin that came off of his face revealed the red, bleeding tendons and muscles in his jaw. The sclera in his eyes was now a sickening yellow and red as blood vessels ruptured from the stress of the degenerative process. His breathing was labored and uneven and he collapsed face down in the mud when the Knights dropped him at the Elder's feet.
Dr. Li looked at James's body in horror and guilt. The muffled groans of agony that came from him were raspy and animalistic. And with every inhale, Dr. Li heard the animalistic sounds of a growling feral ghoul.
"James?" She croaked.
She had left James a mere twelve hours ago to begin her shift finalizing Liberty Prime for the demonstration. When she last saw him, he was in excruciating pain but he seemed otherwise normal. He was still James.
This creature was not him.
Maxon withdrew his laser pistol and shot James through the head. The red bolt of superheated plasma passed cleanly through his skull and fizzled out. James made no other noise as he collapsed face-first into the mud.
Dr. Li felt faint. All of the strength left her body and she sagged in the soldiers' grasp. Silent, cold tears slid down her cheeks as James's blood seeped into the mud. Elder Maxson looked at James's body and shook his head in disgust before holstering his gun and stalking away.
Maddison let the soldiers drag her into the airport to collect her things. Aside from a CIT rucksack that held another Brotherhood uniform and her Institute scrubs, she had nothing else that was hers. The supply room that had been her home for the past two weeks looked like a disaster. Blood splattered the walls and the hospital gurney that James was lying on had been knocked over. More tears welled up in her eyes which blurred the scene into mercifully oblique shapes. The soldiers grabbed her arms, spun her around, and marched her out of the room. She said nothing else to anyone nor did she resist. As the vertibird rose up from the airport's helipad and flew over the shoals and the harbor, Dr. Li felt an all encompassing emptiness consume her.
The ocean was black and the sparse lights from the Boston ruins glinted off the water's surface like jewels. If she listened carefully, she could still hear the hum of the purifier as James ran around the Jefferson Memorial like a schoolboy on a field trip. Oh what Maddison wouldn't give to go back to those days. Back before the Enclave grew to power. Back before the Lyon's Brotherhood collapsed and began Arthur Maxson's tyranny. Before the Institute, Father, and the synth projects that blurred the line between scientific discovery and human autonomy.
James used to go on and on about "the waters of life." He'd quote, "I will give unto him that is athirst of the fountain of the waters of life freely" and Catherine would half-heartedly scold him for using a religious text in such a blasphemous manner. Maddison preferred the second part of that verse: "And he showed me a river of water of life, bright as crystal, proceeding out of the throne of God."
The vertibird docked on the landing platform and the whole cabin shook. Both Paladins took their hands off of Dr. Li to brace themselves against the metal bird's hull. This was her moment. Boston had been Dr. Li's second chance. The Institute was her second chance, and like a damn fool, she threw it all away for a man. A man with a sharp wit, a strong jaw, and intelligence beyond measure. A man who made her laugh and frustrated her and challenged her. A man whom she loved…whom she'd always love. A man who fought through hell to get back to her, only to reach the limits of his own endurance, and be shot in the yard like an animal.
No. Enough was enough. Going back to the Brotherhood was a mistake, but at least she did what she could to help the Institute. But the Brotherhood couldn't use her any longer. Nor could the Institute. Nor could anyone. Maddison was done.
She got up with the two soldiers and clambered down the short ladder and onto the Prydwen's deck. Between the landing platform and the stairs that led up to the deck proper, a six foot wide gap sat calling out like a beacon of hope. One last finite moment of hope. And Maddison took it.
The fall was quick and the woman did not scream. Her splash was masked by the sound of an errant explosion that blew out part of the airport concourse, and the ocean currents carried her away from the Brotherhood and towards her eternal freedom.
Nora rubbed her face as the fractured Directorate, as well as DiMA and Nick, looked to her to walk them through the battle plan. God, how in the hell could she do this? She wasn't a military strategist. She knew absolutely nothing about fighting a battle, let alone one against the post-apocalyptic equivalent of the US Army.
She cleared her throat, "Dr. Filmore. Have you communicated with our Gen-3 synth population that this will be the last chance for them to leave the Institute? DiMA has kindly offered to take them in as refugees —"
"— as free men and women." DiMA corrected.
Nora deferred to him. "Yes. As freed men and women. Allie, do you have a list of those who wanted to relay topside?"
Dr. Filmore scowled but she slid a folded sheet of paper to DiMA who was sitting to her right. Nora knew that most of the Directorate abhorred the idea of losing valuable Institute property, but since Dr. Secord wasn't there to stir the pot, the rest of the Directorate finally shut up and allowed Nora to delegate.
"Far Harbor is outside the relay's range for transport. I can get them all out, but once they are outside the Institute's walls, their survival is in their own hands."
DiMA nodded. "I have plans in place to safeguard their travel to Acadia."
"Nick. Has Piper contacted you about the Diamond City effort?"
The synth sat rigid in his chair. His jaw clenched and his eyes flitted to each Institute scientist before they settled on Nora.
"Between her newest editorial about what life would look like living in a Brotherhood totalitarian state and Travis's glowing support of your cause, they've managed to sway a few people to your side. They aren't gonna come out in full military force, but you have some allies who will do more covert work. Arturo is outfitting anyone who wants to take a bite out of the Brotherhood. He has a daughter so he's not gonna be on the frontlines but it's about the best that Diamond City can do."
"I understand." Nora replied. "The Minutemen are sending those they can spare, but the Brotherhood has been raiding nearby settlements of their food and when faced with fighting in a battle they didn't start or work the land so they don't starve, most chose the latter."
Dr. Binet chimed in. "If we could make some exchange for their help, do you think they'd reconsider? We have adequate food supplies and now that we are losing a significant population of our Gen-3 synths, we will have a surplus of food products. Would they accept food and medicine in exchange for some help?"
Nora considered this. "I will radio their General and ask once I get to Goodneighbor. I think the road to our survival lies in compromise at this point. The Gen-1 and Gen-2 synths can fight because they were programmed to, but when it comes to scientists, their families, their children, and our Gen-3 residents, we are out skilled by leagues when compared to the Brotherhood."
"So you want to destroy our way of life so we can rely on wasteland scavengers to come and save us?" Dr. Holdren snarled. "I've worked with the Warwick family for the past three years. They are all —"
Nora cut him off with a wave of her hand. "You didn't work with them, you experimented on them. You kidnaped the patriarch, replaced him with a synth, and then got insulted when the rest of the family noticed the switcheroo. Don't paint this as some sort of pity party. Wastelanders come in good and bad varieties just like Institute scientists."
Dr. Holdren's face turned red and he glared at the middle of the table but said nothing else.
"What is Liam doing during all of this?" Dr. Binet asked. His voice was quiet but the tension in the room amplified his voice.
Nora swallowed. She couldn't outright tell Dr. Binet that his son had joined The Railroad. Granted, his call-sign of Patriot was a bit 'on-the-nose' in terms of anonymity, but since they were going into battle, the chance at clandestine activity was severely limited.
"Liam is still in Sanctuary Hills. He's been helping the settlers and my old Mr. Handy with maintaining the town's turrets and other defenses. Sanctuary and the nearby Abernathy Farm are the largest inhabited settlements and they need to be as removed from the conflict as possible because they produce the bulk of the food for the Minutemen aligned settlements."
"But …" Dr. Binet cleared his throat. "So he's going to be okay? My son is safe?"
Nora's stomach churned and her answer tasted like venom. "Yes. Liam is safe."
She felt the heat of Nick's eyes on her face but she forced herself to look at the blueprints of the Institute. She and X6-88 walked the corridors and marked areas that would serve as tactical advantages should the Brotherhood break in from above.
"Are there any other concerns before I adjourn the meeting so we can start assembling the Gen-3 synths and get them on their way?" Nora asked.
Everyone except the two synths shook their heads but neither DiMA nor Nick gave any indication they heard her. Nick was still watching Nora and DiMA was watching Nick.
"Okay. Thank you for your time. The meeting is adjourned."
Nora waited for the directorate to shuffle out before she spoke.
"Yes, I lied to him Nick." She said. "What was I supposed to say? Your son left Sanctuary as soon as he learned how to fire a gun? That he joined up with The Railroad and is training with Deacon to do undeniably dangerous things to help our cause?"
"He's just a kid —"
"— Then why don't you go and get him and drag him back to Sanctuary. Jesus Christ, Nick. A paramilitary group led by a zealous bigot is a day away from crashing through our front door and all I got to defend against them is a handful of colonial soldier wannabes, half-starved settlers, and a contingent of trigger-happy chem addicts. The Railroad and their sabotage is our only hope of survival. Liam is intelligent, and with Tinker Tom and Deacon, I think he has a chance to help turn things in our favor."
The silence that fell between crackled like an electromagnetic field. Nora gathered up her things and walked past Nick. The synth's hand grabbed her wrist and his yellow eyes pleaded with her. He didn't say anything but Nora understood the message.
You don't have to do this, doll.
Nora nodded and swallowed. She didn't have to do this. She could relay to Goodneighbor and run off somewhere with Nick and Hancock by her side. But if she abandoned the Institute now, then synth Nate's death was in vain. It was a shitty excuse but Nora wanted his death to at least mean something. Otherwise it just hurt so damn much.
"Are you ready to go DiMA?" Nora asked while still looking into Nick's suffering eyes.
"I am ready when you are." He replied.
"Then let's go. We're going to relay you out of the atrium as that is the only area large enough to accommodate that many bodies."
The three of them walked out of the meeting room and towards the spiral staircase. Nora charged ahead while both synth brothers fell in step together.
"Are you certain that you'd rather stay here?" DiMA asked Nick. "You helped Kasumi and I value your input and perspective. I'm afraid that Faraday and Chase are too timid to really speak their minds in front of me."
"Chase seems like a good lieutenant. She's whip smart and fierce. I think she'd be able to advise you better than I could."
"I'll take that into account." DiMA said. Then there was a moment of hesitation and a tinge of insecurity crept into his voice. "But you do not like Faraday?"
"I don't have anything against the man." Nick said. "Do I like him? Sure. He's kind-hearted and he clearly cares about —"
— "Faraday has always been a loyal assistant to me." DiMA agreed mildly. "I'm grateful to have a friend like him."
Nick made a noncommittal grunt in reply as they walked into the atrium. Thirty wide-eyed synths stood in white Institute tunics with nothing more than the clothes on their back and an Institute pistol at their hip. Some men and women were clearly new as their hair was either shorn close to their scalp or it was just starting to grow out. Other synths looked more established, although not necessarily older, and they looked to Nora with guarded and dour expressions.
"Alright folks, this is the last call for anyone who wants to bail out. Once we relay you topside, you will not be allowed to come back for the foreseeable future. This decision isn't one to take lightly, and I will not judge anyone who wishes to reconsider their decision. You all know what the wasteland is like. I'd like to say that the rumors of the brutality, violence, and mutated creatures are greatly exaggerated, but unfortunately, they're not."
The group looked at her in uncomfortable silence and Nora waited until the anxiety and tension in the room became too much to handle.
"DiMA are you ready?" Nora asked.
The synth nodded and offered his hand to Nick. Metal met metal and their handshake emitted a couple of sparks but neither of them seemed affected by it.
"Take care of yourself DiMA." Nick said.
"You as well, brother." The other synth replied. "You will always have a place among your own kind in Acadia should you wish it."
"I'll keep that in mind."
The group parted to allow DiMA to walk into their ranks. Nora gave a thumbs up to signal to Dr. Filmore once the people were still. Each one disappeared in their own individual blast of blue light. With this many people, the light that came off the relay nearly blinded those who were unprepared. Nora squeezed her eyes shut but even then she could see the faint blue aura of the relay as the synths teleported away. The whole ordeal happened in seconds and the air smelled like warm electronics and ozone.
"Are you ready to go?" Nora asked Nick as she held out her hand. The synth took her hand and slipped it between his skeletal and ruined one and kissed her knuckles.
"You aren't coming with?" Nora asked.
Nick shook his head. "You'll be back in the morning, doll. I think I'll be okay here for twelve hours."
She scowled and cocked her head. When Nick first got to the Institute, he damn near acted like he was walking into the Underworld and now he was choosing to stay behind?
"What are you planning?" Her eyes narrowed on him.
Nick's expression was frustratingly neutral and vague as he walked her over to the atrium's center. "Don't worry, doll. I have a standing appointment with Dr. Binet after this. I — I've decided to do some minor upgrades. Hell, you saw the fireworks display back there. I'd like to shake DiMA's hand without short-circuiting a motherboard. His or mine."
There was something that still rang false in Nick's explanation, but she didn't have time to interrogate the detective. She'd just have to trust him and trust his judgement. "Okay. I'll see you tomorrow then?"
"It's a date." He agreed.
Nick gave her hand a gentle squeeze as a farewell. He was trying to be proper but the heat that passed between them was anything but
"The relay is ready Nora." Dr. Filmore said over the intercom.
A Gen-2 synth scurried forward with her gun, a satchel full of supplies, and her Pip-Boy. Nora pulled herself into Nick's chest and kissed him lightly on the lips. The kiss was chaste but half of the scientists gasped while some literally choked in disgust.
Nora pulled away from Nick and stood on the electromagnetic strip that marked where a relay nodule was embedded into the floor.
Dr. Filmore's voice echoed out, "Preparing relay in 3 … 2 … 1 …" Nora closed her eyes and felt several uncomfortable seconds of weightlessness before her feet hit cobblestone and the cool Spring air rustled through her hair.
The neon glow from Goodneighbor's sign lit up the sky. Her Pip-Boy said that it was half-past four in the afternoon. Most folks would be nursing hangovers or just beginning their daily routines. She debated about sneaking in through the back way but thought better of it. If she was going to build trust with the citizens, then she'd couldn't slink around in the shadows like the boogeyman.
She walked down the alleyway and saw the same kid as before sitting atop a guard barrack. His impressive rifle sat across the wooden ledge and he scanned the horizon for threats. Nora noticed that he didn't look down, at least not at first. His eyes were fixated towards the sky as though he was expecting vertibirds to drop out of the clouds and dive bomb them.
"Good afternoon MacCready. Is Hancock in town?"
The kid's sharp eyes flicked down to look at her, realized just who it was, and stood up in shock.
"Shit — uh — shoot! You're back?! The last we heard was that you got abducted by the Brotherhood of Steel. Hancock's up in the State House interrogating one of them right now."
"He's doing what?!"
MacCready opened the front door and climbed down the wooden ladder that led to the platform. He jumped the last two rungs and landed on the ground with feline grace.
"C'mon, follow me." He said.
The sniper ran across the Goodneighbor courtyard towards the front entrance to the Old State House. The citizens who were out in the courtyard avoided Nora's gaze. A couple whispered to one another beneath their breath. Even Ham, who was lounging up against the wall where Fahrenheit used to stand, pursed his thin lips and shook his head in pity.
"Who died?" Nora asked.
MacCready scowled. "You didn't hear? I thought you'd be the first to know since she was one of your own."
A shiver crept down Nora's spine. "One of my own what?"
"Doctor … or scientist or whatever."
Nora blinked and her blood ran cold. "What happened?"
The sniper shrugged. "The Railroad had a spy stationed at the stop of the Bunker Hill memorial keeping tabs on the airport. They've been radioing information over the Minutemen radio over the past few days. Late last night, the Brotherhood powered up their massive robot death machine. It frickin' nuked a parking garage nearby and then someone reported hearing a shot from inside the Brotherhood's gates. Then maybe a half hour later, the agent saw somebody fall off the airship and land in the ocean."
Brotherhood of Steel soldiers didn't just fall off the Prydwen. Whoever it was must've been so careless or inattentive that they made a tragic misstep … or they jumped.
"Did they find the body?"
"Yeah. Funny enough, she washed up on shore close to The Railroad's old HQ, pack and all. They took the corpse to Dr. Amari before the 'lurks could get it. They found a journal among her belongings. We're letting the pages dry out but they're full of intel on the Brotherhood. You should probably check them out before you leave. Uh … are you alright?"
Nora's throat burned and she didn't know if she was about to throw up or scream. Her hands trembled and she shook her head in response to MacCready's question.
"Take me to the body." She said in a hollow voice.
"Okay … but Hancock is waitin' — Fuck, Nora look out!"
Nora was about to cuff MacCready upside the head. This wasn't a time to play games. But then she felt something solid slam into her as an iron vice grip closed in around her throat.
Gunshots blared in Nora's ear and the beast deliberately slammed her head against the accent wood floor over and over until her vision started to fade. She heard screaming, more shooting, and Hancock's dry raspy snarl as he issued orders, or maybe insults, to the people around her. The words were gibberish to Nora but the pressure on her throat thankfully abated.
Someone grabbed her wrist but she let out a banshee-like scream and clawed at her attacker. Ayo wouldn't hurt her this time. She'd claw his goddamn eyes out this time. He wasn't going to tie her down. Not this fucking —
"Sunshine! It's me! It's Hancock. Calm down, sunshine! I ain't gonna hurt ya."
Nora's heart pounded in her chest. Her neck throbbed but her vision was starting to come back.
"Jo-hn?" Her voice sounded like gravel in a blender.
"Shhh. Don't talk yet." Hancock said. Then he looked behind him, "You got him?"
Three other voices including MacCready replied, "Yeah. We got him."
"Where the fuck is Reno? He's supposed to be watchin' this asshole. If I learn that he's been fuckin around with one of Markowski's girls again, I'm gonna —"
"— Let Haylen go you mutant freak!" The man roared. "If you fuckin' touched her, I'm gonna —"
The raucous mix of voices obscured whatever threat he was going to make. But Hancock heard it and hissed a response that Nora didn't catch. She was having a hard time concentrating on anything aside for the waves of pain radiating out from her windpipe.
Hancock rifled around in his jacket pockets and tossed someone a syringe. "If he can't learn to have some fuckin' manners then this will quiet him down. I want him back in his cell, but this time, chain him up to the fuckin' bars!"
The man struggled beneath the three others who pinned him down as the needle entered his neck. He was on his stomach and his arms were cuffed behind his back. As Nora's vision cleared, she noticed the face and she realized just what had happened and why she had been attacked.
"Paladin Danse?!" She choked.
His lip rose in a snarl and his dark eyes held nothing but utter contempt for her. "You destroyed … everything, Vault Dweller. My life … my career … your Institute created me to be a machine! I — I don't even — No. Maxson was right. You are just like her. I hope that you and the Institute get everything that's coming to you. We will destroy … you."
His eyes rolled back in his head as his forehead hit the floor with an audible thud. Whatever medication Hancock had given him finally took effect. Then the ghoul left Nora's side to help the other three carry the man downstairs. In the silence, Nora's wheezing sounded even worse and she tried to sit up but her head spun which made the nausea worse.
She brought her fingers up to her neck. The skin felt inflamed and the swelling would set in soon. Her entire body trembled as she tried to push out the intrusive thoughts. Ayo wasn't here. Danse wasn't him. She wasn't going to be raped again. She was in the Old State House. Hancock would be back soon. She was okay. Everything was okay…
Except everything wasn't okay. Nora was scared and exhausted. She grieved for what had happened to Madison Li. She thought about Synth Nate. She thought about the people she knew and the ones she cared about and how they were willing to lay their life on the line for her. More people were going to get hurt and some were going to die if she couldn't eliminate The Brotherhood of Steel before they used their death robot to nuke The Institute.
"Fuckin' hell, sunshine…" Hancock rasped.
Nora blinked several times as though she was waking from a daze. She was looking at Hancock's boots and his tattered pants. Her neck hurt too much to move her head.
"Did he break anything?"
"No." Nora rasped. "At least I don't think so."
"D'you need help sitting up?"
"Maybe … yeah."
Hancock slipped his hands beneath her armpits and hauled Nora up to her feet. The room spun and Nora's knees buckled. She collapsed against Hancock and he stumbled back a step while still holding on to her.
"I gotcha. Hold on." He picked up Nora and carried her into his office.
The place looked different since Nora was last here. The heavy curtains had been tied back with frayed but stately gold tassels and evening light streamed in. He pushed a ledger and an assortment of papers off to the side of his desk and set Nora there.
"Look at me sunshine."
Nora did. Her breathing felt labored but she didn't know if that was due to the pain and stiffness in her neck or if it was because she had so much shit built up inside her and the walls were starting to crack from the stress.
"John…" Her voice cracked and she glared down into her clenched hands. "I don't think I can do this."
"Do what?"
"This. All of this. Fight. Raise an army. Protect others. Negotiate and plan and lie and …" She shuddered. "Synth Nate and Dr. Li … they are dead because of me."
"No —"
"— Yes!" She insisted. "The fucking Brotherhood tried shooting us out of the sky, but Nate returned fire and gave us a chance to escape. He caught shrapnel in the chest because of it. And Madison…she — she — I shouldn't have let her go there. I should've ordered her to stay at the Institute. They pushed her too far. She was their prisoner just like I was Father's prisoner. She shouldn't have died! She shouldn't have died."
Nora buried her face into Hancock's chest. He held her and ran his mottled fingers along her back. God, what he wouldn't give to just take her away from all of this. They could just run away and let the Brotherhood and the Institute fight it out between themselves. Nora didn't deserve this. She didn't ask to be the Institute's leader. Just as Hancock suspected, Nora was their fall guy, and now that the shit was hitting the fan, all of the blame and all of the responsibility wrongfully fell onto Nora's shoulders. This was one matter in which Hancock wouldn't gloat over being right. He hated that he had been right.
He pressed his lips to her sweaty brow. The swelling in her neck had gone down and she was breathing easier. Thankfully Captain Metal Ass hadn't hurt Nora too badly.
"Sorry." Nora mumbled. "This is not what you need right now."
"I'll let you know what I need and don't need." Hancock growled. "Right now, you need to fuckin' let this shit out. Remember what I told you when we were in the Glowing Sea?"
"You told me to not push people away when they're trying to give a shit about me."
"Exactly." He said. "I give a whole lotta shits about you. So does Nicky. But you can't keep takin all this pain on yourself sunshine. Some things are not your responsibility or your fault, no matter how shitty they might be. They're just shitty because we live in a shitty fuckin' world. Feelin' upset, or pissed, or scared, or even happy over the bad things that happen doesn't make you a bad person. You need to cry, then cry your goddamn eyes out. I'll be right here. You wanna hit something or smash some shit, then let's go out and cause some mayhem sunshine. You wanna party and dance until you collapse from exhaustion? I'll be the one bringin' the good times and the tunes. But for the love of God sunshine, stop feeling guilty for feeling something. Okay?"
Nora blinked several times. The tears were starting to dry on her face and she felt like a washrag that someone squeezed dry.
"Okay." She nodded.
"Good." Hancock's grin was rakish. "Now I know you ain't gonna be in town long. Let's get business outta the way first. I got a small favor to ask you."
"What is it?"
"That Danse idiot was travelin' with a woman named Haylen. She's over in the Rexford right now. It's a bit of a house arrest situation. I tried to ask her some questions about what happened aboard the Prydwen and what happened with you, but I wasn't gettin' any new information. This bird seems to think that you are some sort of Devil reincarnate with how she talks about you. I wanna know why, and I want you to ask her about it."
"You mean interrogate her." Nora stated.
"Eh. Tato … tat-o. She won't speak to me on account of my stunningly handsome features and my winning personality, but she might speak to you."
"And if she doesn't?"
Hancock shrugged. "Then Goodneighbor has a couple of ex-Brotherhood jail birds until all of this shit is over. She knows that her freedom rides on giving us information. She's a Scribe with a grudge against Elder Maxson and the other muckety-mucks aboard. I'm thinkin' with the right incentive, she'd be willin' to share what she knows … ya know … woman to woman."
Nora sighed. "I'll try but I can't promise anything."
"That's fair." He replied and he helped Nora get off his desk. She didn't sway but the act of swallowing was still a little difficult.
"First things first." Hancock said. "Let's pay our respects to your friend and check in with Amari. She's got some information that might help grease the wheels with the jailbird."
Nora took the ghoul's hand. His skin was rough and waxy but warm. She squeezed his hand once and he squeezed it back. She felt a little better and prepared herself for the emotional onslaught that she was going to face. Maybe when all of this was said and done, Nora would actually enjoy trashing a room with a baseball bat or partying until dawn. It had been a long time since she acknowledged her rebellious side. It actually seemed kinda fun. God…that was a concept that she hadn't experienced in a while.
When it was said and done, maybe it was time for a little anarchy after all.