Author's note: Again, again blown away by your amazing reviews, the new followers and simply all your support. Your words have honestly helped me through a rough couple of weeks where I lost someone close to me and another family member suffered a stroke. Knowing you were waiting for a new chapter, I found the enthusiasm to write again and I hope you'll be happy coming back from the flashback. Also, Alicia's point of view!
Summary: force ma·jeure noun \ˌfȯrs-mä-ˈzhər, -mə-\ 1: superior or irresistible force. 2: an event or effect that cannot be reasonably anticipated or controlled. Alicia & Will, seven months after she left L/G: What part of my dream was real? All of it? I touch my face and cringe in pain. This is real. The parking garage was real. It all happened. This isn't a nightmare. This is reality.
Thanks: to my lovely beta Jen or RomanticSoutherner who's always there to help me improve!

Force Majeure

Chapter 9 – Morning After

"You dragged me up and out, out of the darkest place."

- Snow Patrol (Give me strength)

Friday, 6:20 AM

Can you tell me your name?…The neck brace is just a precaution…have to stay awake.… I'll get you home… CT…Tell me what year it is…Dilaney…Alicia…Want me to call Peter?… Does it hurt anywhere else?...Lay down…Go back to sleep…Alicia…Alicia… It's Will...I'm not here to talk…M&M's anyone?...Wake up for me…Go back to sleep...Alicia…Can you hear me?...Alicia…It's OK…Alicia… I was waiting for you…Shut the fuck up…Bitch…Don't come near her again…

My eyes shoot open.

I gasp for air.

The ceiling I'm staring at tells me I'm home. Thank God.

I'm sweating. The back of my neck, my forehead, my chest… I feel hot and clammy.

I lift myself up to turn on my bed lamp. An immense throbbing pain in my head forces me to close my eyes again. Everything hurts. I groan as a sharp pain rushes through my chest. Exhausted, I fall back in my pillow. I try to keep my breathing shallow, hoping it will reduce the pain in my ribcage.

I stare back at the ceiling. Any attempt to turn sideways just makes the throbbing pain worse. How did I get here? Dilaney, the ambulance… the paramedic telling me I needed to stay awake… Will.

Oh God.

Will.

Where did he go? I tense up as I realize he was the one waking me up somewhere this evening. Did he leave? Stressed out by the idea of him possibly still being here, I force myself up from my pillow. My eyes fall on the alarm clock that tells me 06:24. Next, I spot the untouched glass of water. Did he put that there?

Where's my phone?

I manage to sit up straight. The pounding in my head makes me close my eyes again. I need painkillers. I can't function like this. I keep my eyes closed for a little while and try to focus on my breathing.

What part of my dream was real? All of it? I touch my face and cringe in pain. This is real. The parking garage was real, the ambulance ride was real, the hours in the hospital, the ride back home… It all happened. This isn't a nightmare. This is reality.

I push myself up off the bed. Grinding my teeth in pain, I slip into a cardigan and some sweatpants.

Carefully, I step out the bedroom. Supporting myself on the counters, I move through the kitchen and then my eye falls on the dining room.

Will.

He's sitting on the table, behind his laptop. His head rests on his arms. Sleeping.

I lean against the doorpost for support. The throbbing in my head tells me I really shouldn't have gotten up in the first place.

I don't make any noise. For a brief moment, I simply stand there and watch him sleep like that. He stayed. An incredible sense of guilt takes over me. He shouldn't have. He didn't want to. So, why did he?

I know, it's inappropriate and wrong in a way, but I can't help to enjoy watching him sleep. There's something about the vulnerability in his face that brings me back to better, different, days. I wish, I could walk over to him and rub his shoulders. He would rest his head against my stomach as I did, take my hands in his and pull me closer against him. Stop.

"Will?"

He lifts his head up at my voice. "Oh shit," he mutters. "What time is it?"

Done dreaming.

"6:30."

"Dammit." As he looks up to me, I see how narrow his eyes are and the dark circles that formed underneath them. He's exhausted.

He rubs his face and lets out a yawn.

"Will… you shouldn't have stayed."

He doesn't respond to that and closes his laptop.

"Did you get any sleep at all?" I ask concerned.

"I wasn't planning to sleep," he scoffs at me as if it's the most ridiculous question he ever heard.

I simply nod. I have no idea what I'm supposed to say now. The throbbing in my head isn't helping. I want to tell him thank you. And to, please, stay a little longer. And that I'm so, so sorry.

Instead, I quietly stare at him as he puts his laptop back in his briefcase.

He looks at me as he gets up from the table. He walks to where I'm standing. For a brief second, I think he's coming towards me. But he walks straight passed me, inches away, into the kitchen.

I turn around and follow him. I see him take a phone charger out of the outlet. He walks back to me, my phone in his hands. "It still works," he states. "Just lost the battery cap."

He hands it to me. Carefully, making sure our hands don't touch. One quick glance at the screen tells me three new messages and nine missed calls. I look back up to him. "Thanks…"

He rolls up the cable around the charger and puts it in the pocket of his pants. "Couldn't find yours," he explains.

"Thank you," I try again, in an attempt to make his eyes look into mine, hoping he'll accept it this time. He doesn't. He just stares at me, cold and blank.

Next, he breaks off eye contact as he grabs his keys out of his pocket.

"Will…" I start. "Look. Last night is a bit hazy, but I know… I should have called someone else. I'm sorry, I didn't. I forced you to stay. I didn't mean to put you in that position."

No answer. The silence makes my thoughts trail of to last night events. I lost track of what happened once we left the hospital. How did we even get home?

"We drove here." He interferes my thought process. "Remember?" There's a slight worry in his voice as he asks me that question.

"Yes." I try to state decisively. I do remember. Vaguely.

I'm starting to feel dizzy again.

"What time did we get back here?" I ask.

"Midnight."

I nod. I do my very best to process all of it, but I'm still so numb. The pain is not only in the back of my head, I notice. Now that I started talking I realize how bruised my jaw is.

"Alicia, do you remember what happened?" His question is more demanding now.

I remember. I just don't want to look him in the eyes and think about what happened because I know I'll break down. And I don't want to break down. Not with him around. Not now, not how we are, not… "Yes," I state.

The dizziness is taking over control of my body once more.

"Ok."

"I need to sit down," I mumble and sink down in one of the dining chairs.

"I should go."

"Will, no, wait. Stay."

He frowns at me. "I need to go home."

"Will, I know. But you stayed up all night. The least I could do is offer you some coffee. Or take a nap. You can use the guest room," I offer. "Really, it's fine. You need some sleep."

"Alicia." He cuts me off with a bitter voice. His cold stare tells me I'm not supposed to care, I realize. I'm not supposed to talk, and I'm most certainly not supposed to offer him anything. I don't remember him being like that last night. Then again, I don't remember much of last night.

I just nod. "Ok."

He walks over to the hallway to get his coat. I get up as well. He already has the door in his hand as I reach the kitchen.

I watch him stand there.

He watches me. Silence.

I stare in his eyes, and this time, he looks back in mine. It's not as cold as before, there's sorrow in those eyes this time.

"How are you feeling?" He then asks.

It makes me want to cry, that question. I'm so tired. It hurts so much.

Will, it hurts. I want him to hold me, I want to cry and sleep in his hold. I realize I'm tearing up. I take a deep breath and regain myself.

I sigh and bite my bottom lip, fighting back tears that are burning up behind my eyes. For a second, I think he's going to let go of that door and walk back to me. He doesn't. Of course he doesn't. So I simply swallow back the tears.

"Better." I lie. But it's worse. Much worse.

"Ok," he replies. There's still this frown on his face. It seems as if he's asking himself whether he should hate me or not. It's the first time since it all blew up that I've seen him doubt that. It's been full on coldness all this time. Last night was different, but I was too out of it to really notice.

"Will, thank you."

He purses his lips and sighs. I don't get a response. He doesn't want to be thanked. He hates me for needing his care last night.

Without saying another word, he crosses the doorstep. I get some sort of nod. "Take care," he mumbles, but it doesn't sound sincere.

He closes the door of my apartment.

Gone.

I stand there, staring at the door that he just closed. Then I force myself to move again and close the lock from the inside. My hands are trembling. I turn around and stare back in my apartment. I can't do this. I'm so tired.

I let myself sink down against the door and hit the floor. It hurts.

Everything hurts. Sitting down on the floor hurts, the crying hurts, my stomach hurts, my head hurts. Tears start streaming down my cheeks. The crying shoots sharp pains through my chest, and I just want it all to stop. Through my tears, I notice the red streaks on my wrists. It takes me back to that parking garage, to Dilaney's hot breath on my face, his knee pushed up between my legs and me panicking. I pull up my knees against my chest and hold myself, shaking uncontrollably. Exhausted.

Thank you for reading!

A welcome for the new followers, thank you for coming along! Please let me know what you think and if I'm still making you guys happy

Preview for next chapter: Alicia realizes she can't do this herself and calls her family and work.