Love Struck Delusion
Chapter 31 – Understand That I Am Not Perfect.
Raptor's POV, Rebellion HQ, 1 hour later.
Getting back went pretty easy. But now that I'm back, I got two problems to deal with. The first being that Wreak wanted to hit G.U.N harder then ever for hurting me and Hunter. The second was figuring out how Monroe knew we would try to steal from him. Many options roamed through me, but I had an idea of what might have happened. Even Archer I think has the same idea.
For now, all I did was rest my face from that beating I took and continued to watch as Wreak looked for a way to counterattack G.U.N on the map.
Archer had the recruits outside training beyond the border for now. I heard Char and his men were doing pretty good. But to be honest, I was concerned for Hunter who I haven't seen since Marx got done checking out her head. I shouldn't go look for her, but I know better then anyone what's she's feeling. Even if she lied I still need to help her.
Getting up from the couch with Wreak watching my steps, I stated.
"I'll be back."
"I'll have something by then Commander. We'll get them back."
Nodding as I made my way outside. I looked towards the street, then to the area around the house to not spot a sight of Hunter.
As my mind drew a blank, I heard something above me. Sounded like a gun jamming or something close to it.
Looking up, I soon realized where she was. Next to our hidden little HQ was another, but much smaller torn apart garage. On the roof she sat facing away from me. In her hands I saw the desert eagle from that black ops trooper. She looked to be trying to fix it.
Making my way over to where it looked like she had gotten up. I carefully did my best to follow through and get on the roof of the small building. With her back still towards me, I heard from her.
"Fucking thing."
"Need a hand?" I wondered as she immediately jumped in her seat to turn around and see me smiling at her.
"Commander I...?"
Cutting her off, I urged.
"Let me see."
Making my way down next to her, she handed me the gun.
"What's wrong with it?" I asked as she calmly replied.
"It happened after you...you killed that man back on the roof. It jammed and I can't get it out."
Nodding as I reached behind my back, I pulled out my blade to jam the tip in between the shell casein and the gun itself. With some force, the round came out and landed on her lap next to me.
"There you are." I stated with a small smile as I pulled back on the receiver to make sure it was ready to fire for it's next conflict.
After it was good to go, I handed it back to her to be asked.
"You don't want it?"
Shaking my head as I pulled out Shadow's M1911from my side, I replied.
"Nah. I got this. Take it as your own. It may be a bit big but I'm sure you can manage it. Unless you want a smaller gun?"
Shaking her head as she took the desert eagle from me, Hunter replied.
"No. I'll be fine. Thank you."
"You okay?" I asked her as she seemed a little lost in herself.
"I'm just a little shaken up from all that happened earlier."
Showing her my confused face, I replied.
"Well if you don't mind me asking, when you came to us you said you were self trained and had killed G.U.N before. You didn't lie to us, did you Hunter?"
With her eyes locked to mine, she slowly stated.
"No I didn't lie sir. I have killed G.U.N before. I just never fired a gun before."
"Excuse me?" I questioned in loss as she calmly replied.
"I never shot someone before in my life. All the lives I've taken from this world I've done with my hands. I...like knives sir. The recoil of this just startled me is all."
Nodding, I then asked to be sure.
"So you don't know anything about weapons?"
Nodding back she replied.
"Not a thing. I guess I just got lucky today when I did what I did."
"You did fine Hunter. And listen for a second will ya?"
"Sir?" She said in confusion as I looked up to the sky above.
"Everyone caught in the middle of this cause is here because of me and my dedication towards the slim hope of regaining our freedom. Everyone here is good at something. And it's my job to put that to use. If your talent is with this." I said as I offered her my knife.
"Then stick with it. Here. Take it."
Her eyes stared into mine with such utter loss on how to react. All she could say was.
"I...I don't understand."
"You don't have too. Just take it. If you want to learn about guns I'll be more then happy to teach you. But in case you don't, I want you to at least know your not alone in this. At least if you take this you'll never forget I have faith in your abilities. Now go on. It's yours."
With her eyes still on mine, Hunter slowly looked towards my blade to gently take it from out of my palm. Lifting it up to her view she stated.
"It's beautiful."
"It's killed more then it's fair share of enemies. Take good care of it."
"I will. Thank you sir."
Slowly getting up, I urged.
"Just call me Raptor."
With a smile she replied.
"Okay...Raptor."
Giving her back a small grin as I was about to turn to leave, she stopped me with a question.
"Why did you protect me like you did back in the car?"
With my back towards her, I replied.
"Why did you shoot the man that was about to kill me back on that roof?"
Her eyes went wide as I replied.
"Cause I care about you. And so long as your in this rebellion and on the right side, I will always protect you. Same as everyone else."
"Raptor I...?" Cutting her off I urged.
"You should go get clean. Marx and Misty are making everyone dinner tonight. Can't have you stinking up the place."
Giving me a smile as I jumped off the edge of the small rooftop, I said to myself.
"I hope she understands now what she has in this rebellion. No one is alone."
With some effort, I soon made it back to the HQ. I'm sure Hunter would be going soon to get ready. I should do the same. With what running water we were able to get.
Ten minutes later.
Letting out a small breath of air, I shut my eyes to the feeling of slightly warm water running down my quills. In this state my body was bound to want to sleep after this, but I knew Wreak wanted to still come up with a plan to strike back against G.U.N. I had all intentions of helping him, but to be honest I couldn't agree more with Marx. I'm older like it or not. My chest was still fucked up from that round I took. And my hand was still slightly scabbed over from...?
I stopped myself from trying to remember what happened. To be honest I didn't know if it was really just a dream due to my condition that day, or if I'm really just going insane again. But it had to be just a bad dream. My mind has always been hurting me since that night. I swear it's my punishment for...not being fast enough.
Reopening my eyes to look up at the water spout, I ran my right hand along my neck to ask.
"What happened?"
In my mind, I was wondering how I got this far in life. How did I survive the first two wars?
"You didn't." I heard from my left as I went to look back down.
Slowly looking to my side, I saw Shadow leaning against the door leading out from this room. This time however his eyes were a slight black.
"Don't you knock?"
Giving me a smile with a gentle chuckle, he replied.
"You let me in remember?"
In confusion, I asked.
"What are you talking about?"
"Oh come on Raptor. You can't say you don't understand. You know this feeling better then anyone left alive today. You're insane."
I had no power to get mad at him. In fact I was just in the mood to reply.
"Whatever you say Shadow. You can keep telling yourself that but I'm not insane."
"Are you sure about that? Look at yourself and tell me your just fine." He urged as I calmly replied.
"I'm not fine. I'll be the first to tell you that. I know I'm not okay, nor even near ready for all this. I know I'm not fine Shadow."
"Then why be doing all this? Why go through all this trouble Raptor? Is it for Abbey and your wife? Do you think by somehow putting yourself through all this pain they'll forgive you?"
He was pushing it again.
With a bit deeper tone I replied.
"They're dead. Okay? Do you understand that?" I asked as he nodded calmly.
"Nothing I do will ever bring them back. I'm aware of that fact more then the odds I'm against in all this. And before you ask, no, this isn't for Alicia or my kids now. It's not for me, it's not for this country."
"Then what's it for?" Wondered Shadow as I looked him in his cold eyes to reply.
"You."
Giving me a deep smile, he began to nod.
"Do you think I'll forgive you if you do this"? He asked as I replied in confusion.
"What are you talking about?"
With my body no longer facing the water, I got back from him.
"You're the reason I died. You know deep down I'm upset you couldn't save me Raptor. Hell all this wouldn't be happening if you weren't slow."
Getting madder, I replied.
"I don't care if you forgive me. You did all that yourself. You pulled the trigger. At least I tried!"
Marx's POV.
"At least I tried!"
Raptor's voice caught my attention as I walked past his room.
"Who's he talking to?" I asked myself as I approached his door to look inside.
With him nowhere in sight, I looked towards the bathroom to hear.
"You threw...all away. I did my...to help you. I gave you everything. All I'm doing now is...what...left behind." The water covered parts of his voice as I couldn't understand who he was addressing in there.
"I don't care. You're not real." I heard him state as I now had my ear pressed against the door.
"Just leave." I heard him order with a dark tone I wasn't use to hearing from him.
After a few seconds he went silent, and I suddenly felt something cold pass through me.
Looking towards his window to see it closed, I questioned where that came from.
Refocusing in a matter of seconds, I brought myself forward to say.
"Raptor?"
I got no response.
"Raptor? Are you okay in there?"
"I'm fine Marx. What do you want?"
"It's time for dinner. Wreak and Archer are getting everyone together. I just wanted to make sure you were getting ready."
Hearing the water still going, he soon replied.
"I'll be out shortly. Don't wait for me though."
"Raptor you should...?"
"Marx!" He shouted as I slightly flinched.
"Okay. I'll make you a plate."
Going silent, I made my way for the door to walk back to the main room. As I made sure everything was ready I couldn't help but wonder what I just heard. Who was he talking to?
Raptor's POV, Five minutes later.
Sitting on the edge of my bed all dressed and ready to go to dinner. I couldn't help but think about what was going on around me. Maybe he's right. I might just be crazy. Hehehe...wouldn't that be something? I asked myself as I played with Shadow's M1911.
Rolling the gun around with my index finger, I tried my best to collect myself before wanting to leave this room. But I really don't have a choice. I need to be there for this. It wouldn't look good if I didn't show.
Gently placing the gun back in my side holster, I got up from my bed to approach the door leading out of my room.
To be honest I wasn't even hungry. Nor did I want to be around anyone right now. Its not because I simply don't care for this. Truth be told I want to have this dinner. Its a great way for us as a rebellion to spend some time together. Create bonds. Give us hope.
It's just when Shadow...or whoever my mind is trying to make me remember, mentions Abbey...I just recall that horrible night. It puts me in a dark place. A really dark and fucked up place I can't begin to describe. And I know it can be worse on me, but I don't ever want to go that far again into my pain. It's best if I just forget about it as best as I can. It's worked before. And once I understand that I'm not insane, it's just my mind, I'll be able to move on. It's all I can hope for.
With my body carrying me along in a slow pace. I soon came to the main room to find everyone spread out among the area. Archer, Marx, Wreak, and a nearly half the recruits took up the op tables. As the rest including, Char, his men, and Hunter, took the area around the couch.
"Commander!" Shouted Wreak as everyone looked to me as they ate.
Looking around at each of the faces, I asked.
"Is everyone enjoying themselves?"
"Yes sir!" They replied as I nodded to look at Archer and Wreak who had saved me a seat at the table with them.
Approaching the chair, I took my time to be asked by one of the recruits.
"Are you okay sir? You don't look good."
With eyes still on me, I replied.
"I'm fine. Don't worry about me son. Just keep focused and enjoy you're dinner."
"Yes sir." He replied as he went back to eating.
Slowly looking to Wreak, I asked.
"Did you find something?"
With a smile he replied.
"Oh I found something."
Looking to the plate Marx had in front of me, I pushed it back to urge.
"Well let's hear it Lieutenant."
Still keeping his grin, Wreak replied.
"Well Marx and I took a look through the data Hunter got earlier. Turns out Monroe is not a complete moron. Everything on there is basically useless. He must have taken everything important off his computer once he was aware of our plan. That leaves us down a loss here. We still don't know what he's planning. "
Keeping my eyes to Wreak, I suddenly heard from Hunter.
"Monroe isn't stupid. I could see it when I met him. He has to be looking for a way to flush us out of hiding. And when I did talk to him Commander, he said he wasn't going to declare war. He could have lied but his reason was good. He doesn't want to risk hurting any civilians. It goes against why G.U.N is said to be in our country. To protect us."
Wreak looked intrigue as I asked.
"Did he say anything else?"
Hunter went silent as I then looked back to Wreak who mumbled.
"He wasn't lying. G.U.N is here to so called "protect" us. If he was seen hurting the people of this country everyone would turn on him. Maybe we need to use that to our advantage. Get him to do something wrong. Or at least his men."
Nodding Archer then stated.
"Well we're not monsters here. Let's remember that first. We can't set people up to die. That goes against the rebellion ways."
Looking at my hands, I then added.
"Or we could get rid of something materialistic. Is there anything in Iraq we can maybe get them to fuck up?"
Everyone thought it over, and in time Wreak replied.
"Shadow's peace treaty! We can kill two birds with one stone."
Nodding Archer stated.
"Yeah, the contract is here in Iraq. After the incident in Pakistan with the dignitary, Commander Linnen had it pulled in case of something else happening. I think it's being held in one of their lock-ups downtown. If we can get them to destroy it somehow, this whole country will cry for war. G.U.N will have no choice."
It sounded like a good idea. But part of me felt bad for even thinking of ruining a piece of history like that.
With everyone looking to me, I then muttered to myself.
"I...I don't know how I feel about that. We're rebellion. Shadow Robotnik gave everything he had left in life to earn that piece of paper. What would we be if we destroyed it? What would he be?"
"What would we be if we got our own killed?" Asked Archer as Wreak admitted.
"I know a way to do that too if it comes to that Commander. If it makes you feel any better, they wouldn't feel a thing."
Marx now came in close to say to me.
"You can't be thinking of killing civilians Raptor. Yes it would get us what we want, and it would preserve the treaty, but you go against everything the rebellion stands for, just in the sake of keeping Shadow's legacy alive. What's more important to you?" Asked Marx in all seriousness as I kept my eyes down to my hands to think.
"Commander, we're behind you one way or the other. Even if we don't like it." Stated Wreak as I looked to Archer who was staring at me cold.
"I'll be by your side, but I'll be the first to tell you that if you do this you will pay for it Raptor."
Our eyes locked as Hunter soon entered my vision.
Gently looking into her eyes, I replied.
The choice is yours. Vote in review.
Sacrifice civilians?
or
Destroy Shadow's peace treaty?
Think carefully about all the outcomes each choice has. Ether way something will happen. Good or bad.
mT Shadow.